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divewench Ruby Offline Posts: 96 Pacific Northwest Gender:	Daughter wants to cut! Aug 8^th, 2005 at 6:26pm Okay, so it is her hair. But it's gorgeous! Down to her waist, and I literally just trimmed it for the first time in her life two weeks ago (she's five). I keep stalling, hoping she'll forget about it, but then she says she wants to cut it again a few days later. I know it'll grow back, but it just makes me sad.
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AtlantisAllure

Sapphire

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Hot and humid...For now.
Gender: female

Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #1 - Aug 8^th, 2005 at 7:45pm

Being that five is quite young and jedi mind tricks may still work well at that age...You could take more time out to do fun things with her hair. Make interesting braids, buy her pretty things for it. Tell her how pretty she looks with her long hair and say but only boysss hair short hair. lol I don't know, I am not a parent...But I often wonder about things of this sort, because I know if I ever had a daughter, I would want her hair long. Good luck! Wink

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PreciousLocks

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Turning my gold to silver
one hair at a time

Posts: 812
Gender: female

Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #2 - Aug 8^th, 2005 at 8:50pm

I haven't raised any girls, and my boys only had short hair, but here's my 2 cents worth -- Undecided

Has she said why she wants it cut? and how short she wants it? You may be able to "fix" the problem if you can get to the source of her request. On the other hand, if her request really seems real, maybe you can compromise and do successive "trims" until you and she can find a length that works for her and for you.

You're right, it is her hair. And she does need to be able to start making some of her own decisions - and then you have to Lips Sealed

and

behind closed doors.

Pick your battles, 'cuz if you're like most of us moms, you don't have energy to fight 'em all, so prioritize the important issues and let the "little" ones go. (You have to decide if this is a big one or a little one!)

IMHO, HTH

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30.75" ~78cm/waist&&1bFii&&&&"No chance at all if you think you can pull it off by yourself. Every chance in the world if you let God do it." The Message Mark 10:27

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khrome

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1bM/Ciii

Posts: 1035
santa barbara, ca
Gender: female

Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #3 - Aug 9^th, 2005 at 6:54am

That's a good point - to find out the *root* of the problem. *drum beat* Sorry that was a bad pun! Anyway, I don't have kids, but I can tell you my experiences.

When I was about 6 I wanted a perm and a pixie cut - similar to what my mom had. It could be your daughter admires someone's hair that she's seen. I'm not sure about tips here because my mom gave in, and I got my cut and perm. I HATED it. But it grew back in a few years, and I never asked for that style again.

When I was little I also liked the idea of being "grown up" and that meant getting your hair done. If she's thinking something similar, maybe you can play "beauty parlor" and just tell her both of you will make-believe you will cut each other's hair.

It's true that it's her hair, but 5 is a little young to be making decisions like that. We have official drinking age, driving age, and voting age. Some parents have you-can't-date-until-you are X age or you-must-move-out-of-the-house-by-X age. Why not a Hair Cutting age? Maybe you can tell her she can get it cut when she's 7 (and hopefully convince her that long hair is cool before then.) Wink

Keep us posted if you find out anything, and maybe we can come up with more ideas.

Cynde

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divewench

Ruby

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Posts: 96
Pacific Northwest
Gender: female

Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #4 - Aug 9^th, 2005 at 6:17pm

Thanks for the replies! Actually, I only did her recent trim because she was bugging me about cutting her hair, and I was hoping she'd be satisfied with that. No luck.

I love the suggestions for talking to her about *why* she wants to cut. Almost all of her friends have short hair, so maybe she just wants to fit in. I'll do some digging, and keep you posted.

Thanks again, you gals (and guys too) are great!

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Long hair is considered bohemian, which may be why I grew it, but I keep it long because I love the way it feels, part cloak, part fan, part mane, part security blanket.&&&&Sir Arthur Wing Pinero

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novusfemina

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La nuit a des douceurs
de femme

Posts: 476
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Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #5 - Aug 9^th, 2005 at 8:02pm

It might possibly be that her hair gets in the way?

Ask her what about it being long bothers her...

I know when I was little, my mom used to put my hair in pigtails EVERY day and there was this one awful girl who teased me and called me Pippy Longstocking.. Cry

So sad!

At any rate, when I was that age, I thought the only way to fix that was to cut my hair off... Roll Eyes

Thank goodness I have a better head about me now!

And do the girls she runs around with have lots of pretty clips and things for their hair? I keep thinking it might be fun to take her to Claires or some place like that and have her pick out some hair toys she likes... maybe even have her friends over for a hairdressing party!

That way, when the girls with short hair see how many more styles your daughter can have done to her hair due to it's length... well, maybe your daughter will suddenly find her friends envious of her... Wink

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divewench

Ruby

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Pacific Northwest
Gender: female

Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #6 - Aug 10^th, 2005 at 11:15pm

Talked to my daughter today. She couldn't really tell me *why* she wanted her hair cut. So I asked her how short she wanted it. She showed me about an inch off the ends. I told her that's what a cut two weeks ago when I trimmed. Then she wanted to make sure I had trimmed *all* the hairs. Grin

She also asked me to get some beads to put in her hair, so I stopped by Sally's at lunch today. Hopefully putting the beads in will make her happy (she's such a girly-girl), and it gave me a great excuse to get some new hair toys for myself, too!

I do always let her choose her hairstyle for the day, and she's got more hair toys than I do! Usually she just wants a ponytail, but sometimes a braid. Today she insisted on wearing it down, even though it gets in her eyes. I think she's a true longhair at heart, just a bit confused by the idea that she's *supposed* to cut her hair. I think/hope we've nipped that in the bud!

Thanks again all for the great ideas!

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Long hair is considered bohemian, which may be why I grew it, but I keep it long because I love the way it feels, part cloak, part fan, part mane, part security blanket.&&&&Sir Arthur Wing Pinero

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PreciousLocks Diamond Offline Turning my gold to silver one hair at a time Posts: 812 Gender:	Re: Daughter wants to cut! Reply #7 - Aug 11^th, 2005 at 11:19pm Thanks for the update. Glad you were able to get some feedback from her and gain a better understanding of where she is coming from. Longhairs Forever!!
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Beesan16 Diamond Offline Posts: 677 st. louis, MO Gender:	Re: Daughter wants to cut! Reply #8 - Aug 11^th, 2005 at 11:34pm i think you should try hairsticks, because they might seem grown up to her especially if you wear them too. another thing you could do is get chopsticks(or some solid color hairsticks), sand them out so they don't hurt the hair, and let her decorate them, and paint them herself. hope this helps, good luck
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divewench Ruby Offline Posts: 96 Pacific Northwest Gender:	Re: Daughter wants to cut! Reply #9 - Aug 12^th, 2005 at 5:52pm Oooh, Beesan16 that's a GREAT idea! I've been wondering what to do with the several pairs of Mei Fa sticks I have that won't hold my hair anymore. I'll give them a try in her hair this weekend! Thanks!
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Beesan16 Diamond Offline Posts: 677 st. louis, MO Gender:	Re: Daughter wants to cut! Reply #10 - Aug 13^th, 2005 at 1:20am Quote: Oooh, Beesan16 that's a GREAT idea! I've been wondering what to do with the several pairs of Mei Fa sticks I have that won't hold my hair anymore. I'll give them a try in her hair this weekend! Thanks! yaaaaayy! glad i could help, i always loved arts and crafts
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divewench

Ruby

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Posts: 96
Pacific Northwest
Gender: female

Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #11 - Aug 15^th, 2005 at 5:32pm

So, we had an outdoor wedding to go to on Saturday, and it was over 90 degrees. Seemed like a good time to try her out on some hairsticks. I put our hair in braids, then put mine up in a bun with my LL Swirling Sea Foilstix. I then gave her a choice of any of my five pairs of Mei Fas. She wanted my Longlocks stix, since the Mei Fas were "not as pretty." Grin

I finally talked her into trying the Mei Fas, and they held her hair very well in the braided bun. She got lots of compliments at the wedding too, and was very happy!

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Long hair is considered bohemian, which may be why I grew it, but I keep it long because I love the way it feels, part cloak, part fan, part mane, part security blanket.&&&&Sir Arthur Wing Pinero

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bikerbraid

Shooting Star

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Life is short, Break the
rules

Posts: 6569
Bike Paths of the Midwest
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Re: Daughter wants to cut!
Reply #12 - Aug 15^th, 2005 at 7:14pm

Quote:

So, we had an outdoor wedding to go to on Saturday, and it was over 90 degrees. Seemed like a good time to try her out on some hairsticks. I put our hair in braids, then put mine up in a bun with my LL Swirling Sea Foilstix. I then gave her a choice of any of my five pairs of Mei Fas. She wanted my Longlocks stix, since the Mei Fas were "not as pretty." Grin

I finally talked her into trying the Mei Fas, and they held her hair very well in the braided bun. She got lots of compliments at the wedding too, and was very happy!

Your daughter has excellent taste! Grin

It sounds like everything worked out well - congrats.

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Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile.&&Life may not

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Beesan16 Diamond Offline Posts: 677 st. louis, MO Gender:	Re: Daughter wants to cut! Reply #13 - Aug 15^th, 2005 at 9:42pm glad everything worked out well
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khrome Stardust Offline 1bM/Ciii Posts: 1035 santa barbara, ca Gender:	Re: Daughter wants to cut! Reply #14 - Aug 15^th, 2005 at 10:55pm That is SOO cute!! Did you take any pics? Cynde
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