Well, here we go.  A journal on my hair...and a bit about life I guess.

I had short hair for years.  I hated it.  It made me look boyish.  Then a couple of years ago I decided to think about having children and decided that long hair I could tie up would be easier (I think I might have been wrong about that idea).  To cut a long story short, no kids are in my future, but by the time I realized that, I had my hair to my shoulders and people said it suited me!!  

Last year I ended up in hospital for a few months, and while I could not go to a hair dresser, the boredom of being in the hosptial drove me half mad so I started conditioning my hair out of boredom on days when I was well enough to wash it ... which was every 3 to 4 days...even though I did shower each day.   I conditioned because I knew the meds I was now on would fry my hair if I did not take good care of it.  I never styled or blow dried it ...to much effort for a sick person.

After 2 months of being in hospital, nurses and fellow patients started telling me what great hair I had.  It was funny to me.  I have been totally grey since I was 21 and have used highlights and root coloring to cover it.  By this time, my hair had about 3 inches of grey showing and I felt terrible.

When I got out of hospital, I went and got my coloring fixed up and was amazed to find, with my hair now just to the base of my shoulder blades, people at the National Arts Center, restraunts I went to and even the grocery store, told me I had great hair.  Even my hairdresser wanted to know what I was doing to it to keep it so healthy and nice looking (since when I first started with her 4 years ago it was fried and I cut what little I had off).  My hairdresser is even encouraging me to grow it...as long as it stays healthy of course.

My hair is now 21 inches long....not long to most of you, I know, but a start for me.  I want to grow it about another 15 if I can.  We will see if it will take it, since it is very fine, I have to color (since my hair is a terrible steel grey color), I am on meds that affect it and I have severe psoriasis which requires tar shampoo at least once a week and other icky stuff I have to put in it.

Once of the meds I have been on has made my psoriasis much worse and they are taking me off it and replacing it, since the psoriasis has been bad enough to progress to psoriatic arthritis.  Hopefully that will help.

I have my hairdresser trim off the dead end every 8-10 weeks and touch up my color.  I love the products I use...but will not mention what they are since I have not seen anyone else mention theirs.

This site has made me think about a lot of things I never did before but that I am sure will benefit my hair.

On an off the hair topic, the commradory (sp?) I have seen on this site and the boost having hair that people like has enspired me to start losing the 40 some pounds that the medication that cause my psoriasis to get bad put on me.  And hey...who knows...from there I might quit smoking.  I would not want to set myself on fire by accident!!!!  In short...the dream of long healthy hair is encouraging me towards a healthy lifestyle altogether.

Thank you all for being out there to talk to and question.

Hey, welcome to the world of journals! It's okay to talk about your preferred products, we actually do it all the time!  I'm sorry you're sick. I'm glad that long hair has made you want to be healthier though. Not pushing, but you really should consider quitting smoking. Not only is it dangerous to you, but to your furniture! I can't tell you the number of sheets and pillowcases that have burned holes in them because my guy dropped a lit ciggarette on it.  :-/ Including the satin pillowcase i spent three days making.
anyway.
I hope the new meds they put you on help more than the last ones did, and that you continue to enjoy your time here, and your hair. if you ever decide to put pictures of your hair on here, I'd love to see them.

Best wishes for health and hair,
Kiraela

Glad to see you've started a journal.  Many find their journals to be a great way to express themselves on anything, not just their hair.  Yes, it is OK to mention your products - everyone likes to compare what works for who and what type of hair they have.

You have started your journey towards long hair and have a reasonable goal - good luck on the rest of your journey.  I look forward to following your experiences in your journal.

Congrats on starting your hair journal, Joeydog.  :)

While I agree that smoking is TERRIBLE for one's health, I am pleased to say that I do not allow ANY smoking in my house (even when it is minus 30 degrees celcius and I have a cold) so my furniture and my animals do not suffer.  I had this house built for me and wanted to keep it fresh.  Even in the days when I did smoke indoors, I did not smoke in the bedroom.  Now I worry about you Kiraela, that is a quick way to have a fire start and die a horrible death.  Nag that man of yours!!!

Bikerbraid, you solved a problem for me.  I was going to complain today about my animals pushing me off my silk pillows at night!!!  They think that is a great place to sleep and try fighting 2 border collies and 3 cats for pillows.  I saw you mentioned the Silk Sox for Long Locks and I have contacted the appropriate person to purchase a couple...one for sleeping and one for housecleaning!!  

On a different forum I was looking at yesterday, I posted that I was suffering from psoriasis.  I recieved a link for natural shampoos under that forum (it was the one about vinegar and ACV rinses).  I am going to look at that today and hopefully find something more user friendly than the tar shampoo I use now.  Everyone is sooo helpful here.

With the help of yet another person on this site, I have learned that I have 1b fine hair.  Who knew there was sooo much to know about hair!!  So, since everyone says telling about the products we use, here we go, these are mine.

As previously mentioned, I have to use a tar shampoo twice a week.  Even when I use this, I try not to get it on the length, just the scalp, sooo, for regular (non-tar shampoo washes) and for the length, I use AG 2WO shampoo for color treated hair.  I follow this with the AG 2WO conditioner on days when I do not use tar and follow up with AG Conditioning Mist once out of the shower (I love this stuff!!  can use it when hair is dry too).  When I use the tar shampoo (twice a week) I deep condion.  On Fridays I towel dry my hair (with a turbie twist...thank you for that idea too) then mix some AG Deep Conditioner with a bit of AG Varnish, put on my hair and wrap it in saranwrap for 5 minutes after which I rinse and leave it at that.  On Tues or Weds I do my tar thing and then turbie twist dry the hair, put on AG Ultramoist Moisture Treatment for 5 minutes in the same fashion as the Deep plus Varnish mixture.

I try not to wash my hair more than 3 times a week, but when I get hot and sweaty, I rinse my hair and just condion it with the AG 2WO Conditioner for Color Treated hair and follow with the AG Mist.

Ya, I know, it sounds complicated and seems perhaps like a lot of conditioning, but with the oral meds I take and the treatments for psoriaisis, it does not seem to be over conditioned.

Also, one of the meds I use for my psoriasis is REALLY greasy.  I used it yesterday and followed it with a vinegar rinse before I shampooed.  That was GREAT.  I only had to shampoo once instead of two or three times, which has to be better for my hair.  Thanx for the idea folks.

Now I am going to do some exploring and see what I learn today...before I start the dreaded house work.  Ugh!!

Thanx everyone, for all your help.

Well, I have started using the recipes on the threads.  Today I tried Lisebelles recipe for avacado, cocunut milk and EEVO.  It worked well.  I want to try Curlygirls recipe too...she has such nice shiney hair.  Both are found under the recipes threads.  If you have trouble finding, let me know.

This reminds me...for those who did not know...I have started a thread for food recipes for quick, easy and healthy food.  If you cannot find it, let me know...to be honest...at this second I cannot think where it is or I would tell you.

So, I have decided...I am going to grow my hair to my.........well classical length and then (I know...terrible) chop it off for the people who need wigs for cancer.  I KNOW you all think the cause is good.  I just know the idea of cutting it off is terrible.  But if I wait to do it once my hair is bottom length...I will still have some length since they need 12 inches.  Hey, could be one of you or myself I am donating to.  Would you rather have a wig or be bald.  I would like a wig...if I had to.  I have a friend who does this...oriental...most beautiful hair I have EVER seen.

I cannot give blood because I am always anemic, the meds I am on and I am AB + which helps very few.  I can give my hair to a woman in need.  No, it will not save a live...but maybe a womans self esteem....so if any of you Long Haired Beauties ever decide to cut it off...don't let it go to waste in you hairdressers garbage...give it to people who make wigs for cancer patients.

    I think it's absolutely wonderful that you want to donate your hair to women with cancer! Best of luck in that goal.  Just, do me (and yourself, and your hair) a favor, and do as much research as you can on where to donate. Some organizations out there *cough*locks of love*cough* sell far more than 50% of the hair they recieve on the open market, rather than make it into wigs.  
   Pantene has a charity called Beautiful lengths, which is one of the few, if not the only, charity that actually donates wigs to adult women with cancer. Locks of love only gives wigs to children with permanent hair loss from alopecia areata, scalp burns, or something similar.

Thanks for the info about the charities and what they do with the hair.  I will make sure I do my research well.  LOL, I have 3 or so years to do that.  I think I can fit it in.   ;D

:) I'm just trying to look out for a friend! Like I said, good luck on your hair growing!

Well, so much for my plans to donate hair to cancer patients!!!  Your hair can only be a maximum of 5% grey (and I am completely grey) and you cannot color your hair (which I do because I am completely grey).  Oh well.  I guess I will just grow it for me then!! ;D

Not much news on the hair front except that it does seem to be getting slightly healthier due to the advice, recipes and helpful hints I get from people here and it has only been 2 weeks since I joined.  I cannot wait to see you my hair is in 2 months!!

On the life side, I checked my weight today and have dropped some despite not dieting or excercising as I was ill.  I guess being ill reduced my eating!!  I also started back on my running today.  It seems so sad that I can only do 2 minutes run and one minute walk five times after being able to run 10 k just 6 months ago.  Oh well, as the weight comes of and I regain my health after being sick for so long...it should come back to me by the end of the summer.

I have decided that once I lose the next 10 lbs, I am going to treat myself to a dermal abrasion treatment and take on the task of quiting smoking.  That will get me out there running and biking...speaking of which...I should pick up my bike from the city.

By the way, I have read in some places that one should only condition their hair from the ears down and other places say to condition the scalp too  :-?

Can anyone tell me which is right or does it depend on what you are using?

When I am going to shampoo, first I apply conditioner to the ends from ears down.  Apply shampoo, rinse and then apply about 1 teaspoon of conditioner on top, which I distribute by running my fingers through my hair.  Then I rinse most of the conditioner out.  However, I add the 2nd application of conditioner only if my hair feels like it needs it.  Most of the time it does, but sometimes not.

Good Luck!

Thanks Sakina.  I will let you know how it goes.

Ugh, bad day today with the disease and it is only 9:30 am.  Had a terrible night sleep...nightmares all night...waking me up in a sweat.  Was wide awake early but had no desire to get out of bed and face the day.  It is one of those days where nothing seems right or good enough.  You know the days where everything you look at has fault with it and it all seems too much to fix.  It is a shame since it is a beautiful day out.  

I recieved a new OHIP (health insurance card for those of you in other countries) card with my pic on it.  Good God, do I really have to live with it for the next 5 years?  I look like the Good Year Blimp.  That said, I know I really do look that bad with the 40 lbs I have put on.  I know what you are going to say, don't complain and do something about it.  I am trying.  Once I am done this, I am going for a run (or what passes as one - can only do about 1k compared to the 10k I was doing a year ago when I was fit).  Its just the me I knew just  8 months ago seems so far away that she will never come back.  Sigh.  I know that is not the case.  

As for my hair, it is greasy today.  I have never had greasy hair before.  I think I put too much jojoba oil on last night.  I guess I will try a vinegar rinse and a light condition.  I don't really want to wash it properly today since I have had to wash it every day for the past week due to the psoriasis and that shampoo is sooooo harsh.  I want to jump in the shower right now and wash it out...but there is no point until I have been out running.  

Well, I guess I should stop wallowing and start doing.  I think I will feel better about the house once I vacuum (5 animals leave sooo much fur around on my pale carpets), then I will run, shower and maybe go to my favorite health food store (which also sells produce) and think about my menu of healthy food for the week.

God I miss work.  I will be soooo glad when I am well enough to go back.  I miss the work and I miss my colleagues.  I do not miss getting up at 4 am though!!

Thanx for tolerating my whine.  I think writing it out helps put things in context for me.  I can't fix my world in a day, but at least I can do something to make the day worth while.  

Ok, the day is looking up.  Sorry about the previous whine.  I got the house half clean, went for a run, took the dogs for a walk, did my weights, went to the store and bought some ingredients to make some healthy snacks, soups and smoothies which I spent the afternoon making.  And best of all, the vinegar rinse did a fab job of fixing my greasy hair!!!  It is back to shiney and healthy looking.

I tell you what though, I hope I lose the weight faster than my hair is growing!!!   ;D

Tomorrow has nothing fun going on in the hair department and I have to finish my cleaning.  Then the big day is on Thursday when I spend the day at the hospital and find out if I get to go back to work any time soon or not.  Oh I hope so.

I had no idea they were still handing out the photo OHIP cards?  I still have my nasty red and white one. Strange eh? :)

Lisabella, I will tell you, it is one of those things the gov't never got right.  Ony 2/3 of the country got switched over to the pic id.  This was not intentional, they just missed that many people.  The result is that those of us who are using  the correct cards have to renew them every 5 years while 1/3 of the population is still using outdated cards.  It really is crazy.  How they missed so many people is beyond me but if they could not get that right, imagine how much health insurance fraud is going on.  Funny thing though, they never miss you if you don't do your taxes, etc!!!

wrote on May 30^th, 2007 at 9:06am:

Lisabella, I will tell you, it is one of those things the gov't never got right.  Ony 2/3 of the country got switched over to the pic id.  This was not intentional, they just missed that many people.  The result is that those of us who are using  the correct cards have to renew them every 5 years while 1/3 of the population is still using outdated cards.  It really is crazy.  How they missed so many people is beyond me but if they could not get that right, imagine how much health insurance fraud is going on.  Funny thing though, they never miss you if you don't do your taxes, etc!!!

That's our goverment for ya'.  The left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing. :P

Well, to heck with the diet today!!  Today is a day of celebration for me.  After being off work almost 8 months due to illness, my doc told me I can go back to work in a month...assuming the new meds go well!!!  I have decided that the reverse to the placibo effect is in order here, I AM going to do well on the new meds.  

I am soooo happy ;D.  I miss work.  Yes, it will take me a couple of years to pay off the debt I have taken on...but the longer I am out, the more I will owe.  Yes, it will be intimidating to go back...but hey...when I was off work for 3 years and told I would never go back I had to go back into a new job with new people.  At least this time I am going back to people I know and people who care.  In fact, to give credit to my work mates, when I was in hospital, they bought me a small screen DVD player to watch movies on (plus 5 movies) and made sure that one of them came to see me each day for 3 months!!!!  I LOVE my work and my work group!!!  I am a lucky girl.

I have  a million things I want to get done around the house before I go back to work (dry wall the garage, seal the garage floor, put up shelves in the garage, prime the basement walls, dig new flower beds, finish painting the house...etc).  My friends and work mates are soooo cool, they told me (since my hubby is away for 2 months minimum due to work and I have jobs I cannot do alone) that they will come and help me on weekends in shifts (as in 3 or 4 at a time).  


On the hair front...nothing new to report.  Sorry since I know that is what we are really here for.

I am just a happy woman today...too bad I cannot lose 40 lbs in 1 month...or even 20 for that matter!!

Congratulations!!! You definitely have cause to celebrate!:D  It's great that you're able to go back to doing what you love and your coworkers do sound very cool and very thoughtful!

Good luck with getting everything done around your house!

Don't worry about not having any hair news, your journal is here for you to post whatever you want. ;)

Oh, that IS good news!   :)  Very happy for you, my dear!

Ok, I am going crazy here.  I am desperately trying to change my photo of the little dog to a photo of my Joey (hence the screen name).  I have spent about 30 minutes trying...any help would be appreciated!!!!

So, I am declaring war on my psoriasis, now I am off the meds that made it so bad.  I am slopping cream on the patches on my skin and living with greasy hair as I use the oil with corticosteroids added prescribed to me.  Them there are the terrible shampoo sessions with tar shampoo.  Yuk.  Still, I will live with greasy hair and stuff for two weeks if I can beat this flaking and itching out of my life!!

Actually, while the shampoo is nasty and I have not liked the oil stuff because of the greasy hair, I have found that using and AVC rinse takes away the greasiness and my hair ends up looking great once shampooed...until I grease again, which is pretty much as soon as it dries.  I have to oil it twice a day and leave it in for 12 hours.  Once a day I use the tar shampoo after an AVC rinse.  Sooo, while it makes my hair very greasy...I am trying to find out what the oil is that they use as a carrier.  I have not had any luck yet but have contacted the company to find out...since some of you might want to try it...if you can tolerate washing out after a night in a shower cap.  I find it works better than anything I use for soft, shiney hair, even if it is medicinal (sp?).

I bought a new boar bristle palm brush today to keep in my purse once I go to work again.  I hate it.  It is too soft even for my fine hair.  Oh well, live and learn I guess.

I have a really nice wide tooth comb from Burt Bees and I have been looking to buy another one to keep at work since I usually run at lunch and then shower at work.  Sadly, it seems it was a promotional thing and I have not been able to find anything like it since.  I am open to suggestions from anyone.

Tomorrow I get back to the diet.  I wish I could magically lose at least half of it by the time I go back to work.  I suppose I could if I used a fad diet but I don't do those.  I would only pack it back on again if I did that.

Tomorrow I am at the folks (delayed today due to rain as they wanted me to BBQ for them and do some chain sawing) and will ask mom to measure my hair.  I cannot do it alone.  

Have a great weekend folks.

Is the comb for wet hair or dry hair?  If it is for wet hair, you might want to consider a wide tooth comb made out of celluloid(?)make sure the seams are smooth though!  Conair and a host of others put out good ones.  Try the Body Shop,too!  Some members have gotten theirs there and really like them.  
If it is for dry hair,well Ric the combmaker is the best if not one of the best!!! You can even get your name on it!  Hopes that helps some!

Thanx for your response Curly.  I guess I need one for each....I did not know it made a difference to be honest.  How come?

Ric the comb maker?  Is there a website I should link into?

Funny you should mention the Body Shop.  I was just on their website.  Guess I will go back and have a look.  Thanx.

joeydog,
congrats on being able to go back to work.  :D best of luck with the transition! and i admire your work ethic with the garage...that sounds like a huge project!
have fun bbq-ing and chain sawing!  

Hey, I'm glad you're getting to go back to work! Also that you managed to get the avatar to work, that is one seriously pretty pup. Is he a border collie?

Hey Kiraela,  I was just getting to coming on my journal and thanking you for your easy to follow instructions for creating an avatar.  Yes, it is one of my bordercollies.  He is the real Joey Dog.  1992 is the year he was born...he sadly will not be with me much longer.  And thank you for the compliment.  I think he is a real cutey but I am a little biased.

Thank you everyone for the support about me going back to work.  I can't wait.  Then again, I can.  It is a nerve racking idea, but my life will be much happier and fuller once I am back...although my dogs are not convinced!!!  I had to break it to them gently with a dentabone. ;D

Went and did the stuff at the folks and intended on cutting my grass, and all that out door maintenance stuff today, but it started to pour rain on my way home and has not stopped.  Perhaps I will get a chance tomorrow although the forecast is for rain for the next couple of days.

Th psorisais war continues.  Obviously, no big change yet, expept that the keys on my laptop are getting oiled from the greasy stuff that is on my hair and gets onto my fingers when I play with it (must stop doing that).  Still, this is the way that it will be for a couple of weeks until I win the war.  

Hair - greasy...what can I say.

Take care all!!!

I have a question for you people that are wiser than me with hair.  I could not find an appropriate place to put this...so here it is in my journal.

If any of you have read my last couple of entries, you know I have to lie with greasy hair, 24/7 for probably 2 weeks.  It is already driving me nuts so I have used a scrunchy to tie it up in a ponytail/bun.  I don't want this grease on my face and clothes for the next 2 weeks!!!  So, the question is...do any of you wash your scrunchies and how does it work out with the elastic.  I presume cold water to save the elastic.

And as a complete aside, how do I get the oil off my keys on my key board?  Gawd this stinks!!!

I wanted to see if I could manage getting a photo in my text.  If this worked, here is a REAL CAT that I met in the Dominican Republic.  He is only 2 years old  (will still grow a lot) and weighed over 200 lbs.  He was amazing...dogs don't want me to bring him home though, much less my kitties.  And yes, i did take this photo.
http://i207.photobucket.com/albums/bb272/joeydog_1992/100_0918-1.jpg

Cute Joey Dog!!  I had a dog as a kid that looked a lot like Joey, brought back happy memories.

Love the tiger-did you pet him?  I've always wondered how their hair compares to a domestic cat's.

***super good secret alert***

My secret for getting oil out of anything (fabric and off skin) is....

water and baking soda

Impressive, eh??

I don't measure it, just throw it into the wash machine along with the detergent and then add the clothes.  I think you could add your scruchies and just let 'em air dry.
Mix some warm water and baking soda and wash your face if you get the oil on it.  I've never used it on my face, I don't know if you'll need to use your regular cleanser after but I'm sure you'll want to moisturize.

Let us know how it goes!!!!

I've pet tiger cubs before, never adults, but I remember their fur was courser.

Joeydog, I'm glad the instructions I sent you worked! That's one heck of a pretty kitty!

Well, I will tell you a secret Sakina, yes I did pet him...but I should not have been allowed.  He was behind glass in the photo but because my friend was soooo interested in them (there is a white too...I will post pic later if you are interested) and told them she was with a vet who worked with exotics...although never this exotic, they asked me if I would like to go back and meet him!!!  There were lots of rules and I actually met him in water!!  It was sooooo cool.  And their fur is much rougher than our little pets.  Gawd he was nice.  I had to feed him a steak first!!!  How cool is that!!!

Thanx sooo much for the baking soda thing.  I have actually used baking soda on my face.  I do gycolic acid peels and use baking soda to neutralize the acid.  Yes, I would say moisturize really well after.

I will try it on the scrunchies...and to be honest I use it on my running/wicking outfits that have to be done in cold water...so it would make sense.

I am glad my Joey brought you happy memories.  Hopefully no tears though!!!  Gawd losing them is hard.

Ooh, as a true tiger lover, I say "bring on the kittehs!!!!"  ;)

It's cool that you got to meet him in person! I've loved tigers ever since my second birthday, when I got "kitty" a stuffed tiger, from my oldest half brother and sister. They lived with their mom, and I with mine, so it was our first meeting.  :-? Anyway though, I've always wished I could get the chance to pet an adult tiger. *envious*  maybe one day.

Pretty kitty! :D  We have a friend in Tweed, Ont who has a zoo with tigers, lions, wolves, a Kodiak bear who is such a sweet heart! and many other critters.  When the lions were cubs we use to go into the pen and play with them! :D There star was a camel named Haji, he died a few years ago.  I got to pet and feed him, what a big suck!  The bear liked hubby very much, at that time hubby had a beard, a nice thick red beard (sigh!)  Well we where sitting next to the bears enclosuer and the bear was right next to us when his tounge, of which is about a foot long!  Licked hubby from ear to ear! :o :P :-? It goes without saying these animals are very tame, most were rescues.  The bear was from a zoo out west that closed down amd just left him there.  The tiger was a retired film star and others were saved from varoius bad situations.  Neat place! :D

You must have so  much fun at that zoo.  I wanted to work in a zoo when I graduated, but it is really hard to get a vet position at a zoo because EVERYONE wants to.  Anyway, here you go, one white kitty!!

http://i207.photobucket.com/albums/bb272/joeydog_1992/100_0919.jpg

Ooh, I love big cats!  Nice pics.

Have you ever seen the documentaries on Sigfreid and Roy?  They live in a mansion with cats just like those and they roam all around the house, even sleeping in the bed with them.  I think its so beautiful, just like the garden of eden.  Too bad it's dangerous to live like that though, I'll stick with my bengals.:P

I love white tigers but they have so many health problems from being inbred to such an extent.... pretty much all white tigers in the US trace back to the same four or five. Even quite a few of the ones in the rest of the world have the same genetics. :( Sometimes they come out with serious birth defects, which sucks because then the zoos won't want them, nor private owners(who usually shouldn't have big cats anyway) so they end up put down. That is a fine specimin of the color, though, Joeydog.

LOVE tigers--great photos, joeydog.   :)  And the real Joey dog is great, too.   [smiley=thumbup.gif]
I wash my scrunchies, too.  I place mine in a lingerie bag and toss them in with my regular wash.  I think I used cold water.  Hang them up to dry (or dry flat) as opposed to machine drying.  

Thank you all for your comments on my pics...especially the one of my real Joey Dog.  Actually, he is just Joey but whatever.  After I have done this, I will post my favorite freind from my visit to the DR.  Stay tuned.

Yesterday was a good day.  It was supposed to rain all day but it didn't until later afternoon.  As a result I got my grass cut (I live in the boonies so there is lots of grass) and I got my whipper snipper up and running and did that.  Then I went to the nursery and bought my plants for my planters and planted them.  I also got a bunch of house cleaning done.  Oh, and I found that I have a sparrow nesting (with 4 eggs) in a blue cedar in my front flower bed....so much for edging the bed as I do not want to scare her away.  I got my humming bird feeders up too and am getting a lot of business on those.  Love to see my birds at the feeders.

Today has sucked to be honest.  Rain all day and today was weigh in day for my diet....no gain, no loss.   Even though it has only been 4 of the 14 days I have to grease my hair with mecidation for my psoriasis, I could not stand having geasy hair all day so I washed it at lunch time and did not remedicate...yet.  I have to say, it looks really shiney and is soft, but I hate this medication.  Short term pain for long term gain I guess...I will medicate it again shortly.

Ihave really dry skin and have not looked after it since I got sick so it is terrible.  I tried an experiment tonight...I will leave it at that and let you know what it was if it works well.

Kiraela, I wanted to talk to you about nails...but I have written a novel already, so I will do that tomorrow instead.

Take care folks.

Here we go, a pic of my favorite part of my trip.  I got to swim with this guy for an hour while I was in the DR.  It was GREAT.  It was something I had always wanted to do.  There was a second one in the pool and they were my foot boards for water skiing.  It was great.  I have the whole thing on video too.

http://i207.photobucket.com/albums/bb272/joeydog_1992/100_0885.jpg

And I finally got the pic the right size!!

Well, half way through the battle of psoriasis on my scalp.  I washed my hair today with the terrible tar shampoo and found my scalp seems to be clear or psoriasis...but since there is nobody to actually look at it with a 'fine tooth comb' I will continue the treatment for the next week (argh) to be sure.  I aam positive I mentioned that (other than the gawd awful tar shampoo) I have to put this greasy....crap on twice a day and leave it.  In an attempt to prevent the meds going on the length, I put 1) jojoba oil 2) coconut oil OR 3) cocoa oil on the length.  Yup, I am a grease ball...which the meds would do anyway...but for the couple of hours a day after I wash my hair and wait for it to completely dry before I medicate and oil again  :(, it look and feels GREAT.  I think the cocoa oil is the best for me...and lets face it, it depends on how the molecule oil fits in with your hair...so it will be different for others...but it is fun to experiment before I go back to work and cannot have greasy hair!!!  Oh ya, I was introduced to AVC rinses by this site...and I use that each day right now after the oils to get them out so I do not have to shampoo so much.  I will be glad when this 2 week war on psoriasis is over.  On the bright side, I am seeing a big difference in my scalp and infected areas on my skin (I think the daily 15 minutes with cocount oil on my skin...grr, cannot sit down or where clothes while I do it before I shower and you should see me trying to stop my animals licking me) and hope to have it under control when I go back to work.  Thank God I am off the medication that made my psoriasis sooooo bad.

So, ya, find the right oil for you...based on what your hair absorbs...and have it shine and look great...

Oh ya, a friend is coming over tomorrow, so while my hair is only 21 inches and not all one length, I will ask him to photograph so I can share, because I have learned now...it is not the length that matter for a large part on this site...it is the health...and I believe my hair is healthy, although not long.

Nite all

I completely forgot the photo.  It has been a long day but I am happy to say the my garage is completely dry walled and the first coat of mud is done.  Tomorrow is mudding and sanding, and when that is done, how ever many coats and days it takes, I spend a day putting up shelves, then a day spray painting the lot...then putting 6 inches of rubber up the walls so I can still hose out my garage...and then putting everything away.  Hopefully it will all be done in 5-7 days.  But today was the worst day in terms of physical labour...so I am glad it is done.

Of course, after the work I showered and did...and I have decided I am not doing the greasy psoriasis treatment tonight...just putting it up in a pony tail and going to bed....exhausted, and tomorrow promises to be another really long day in my hot, humid garage...but it will be worth it...and it is an investment in my house...and good practice for when I finish my basement (gawd, too much to think of right now).

Sweet dreams all.

Not much exciting to say about hair.  I just spend my life working on getting the garage done.  Tomorrow I have to go see my doc and hopefully he will say I am good for work in a couple of weeks.

I think I have gained weight instead of losing any.  Not getting out running, doing weights, etc, and because I am so tired by day end, I tend to eat poorly.  Oops.  I am joining a running group tomorrow, hopefully that will help.

I saw a story in the local rag today that I thought I would share with you all.  It is about a Rev from a church who had grown her hair for 17 years. In an effort to raise funding for cancer, whe was pledged $2000 to cut off her hair.    She was going to shave her head completely until the memebers of the congregation thought that would be a shame so instead she cut it at shoulder length to get the plegde money and then she donated the hair to Locks for Love.   Talk about long hair though...there is a pic of her holding the cut off hair at the same level as the top of her head and still goes to her waist AND she still has shoulder length hair.  Isn't that amazing!!!  When I researched donating hair, they said it was 6 X 6inch pony tails to make a wig.  She must have donated enough to make more than half a wig.    While I am sure she must feel bald, I say "Good on her" and she looks to be in her late 20's so she can grow it back.  

J-dog, those tiger pix are beautiful. I pet a tiger when I was little, because my uncle was the tiger handler for that zoo.  In high school I got to hold a lion cub in Egypt. He was heavier than a lab, and had huge paws, but very sweet and sleepy when I held him. I love big animals.
For hubby's birthday I just bought him "Planet earth", the series done by BBC about land animals and climates. It's fantastic footage, and lots of lions, tigers, and polar bears. :)

hmm,wow , that sounds like a ton of hair that woman had. I don't know if I'll ever be able to donate my hair when it's finally long, since it's taking me so much blood, sweat and tears to get it long. Ok, maybe not blood, sweat and tears, but lots of determination and patience.   ;D

Roomtogrow,

I agree it would be hard to cut it all off.  I had planned on doing that once I had grown mine but apparently my hair in not suitable.  I am rather sorry.  While it is a quest to grow long hair, I cannot imagine ending up bald one day because of cancer...I would want a wig for sure!!!

I think I also thought of it because I cannot give blood and I would like to do something to help people....guess I will have to keep trying to come up with ideas.

You can give of yourself, without giving part of yourself, you know? Other options to consider are volunteering at soup kitchens, or talking to your local hospitals or nursing homes about volunteering to come talk to, and sit with, patients. Childrens' wards are usually grateful to have someone come read stories to the kids, or just take the time to talk to them.  Actually, one of the things I learned researching harps, is that music therapy is a big help and comfort to critically ill patients, and often, patients that have been visited by a harper or other music therapist do far better than doctors gave them any hope of doing.

There's a couple of ideas, anyway. I don't know if they help, or are feasible, but...  

K, those are some great ideas.  In the past I have volunteered at hospitals and done everything from 20 hours a week of doing laundry (not pleasant I can tell you, but needed) to taking the real Joey in as a Canine Good Citizen to visit alzhiemer patient...like music therapy, Joey did them a lot of good.  I cannot pend too much time away from my dogs once I am back at work, since I am out a good 14 hours a day with work, but you got me thinking that once I have a new dog (not that I want that at all, but Joey is not long for this world) maybe I can spend a year training him, get him through the Canine Good Citizen exam and get him to a hospital near by.  I will ponder that.

I have over done it this week.  Trying to hard to be well again.  I had to take today off from the chores I set myself.  I woke up around 7, took care of the animals and sat in bed drinking coffee and reading until 10 when I went to pick up a package that was sent to me.  It was my new wood combs from Ric the Combmaker.  THEY ARE GREAT.  I love them.  Thank you Curly for suggesting them to me.  Now I just have to figure out where to get a colloid comb for when my hair is wet.

When I got home I did an ACV rinse and washed my hair.  Thank God tomorrow is the last day of greasy hair in the battle against my psoriasis.  It seems to be gone on my scalp.  Still battling a couple of spots on the body, but a combo of the meds and coconut oil seems to be getting rid of it...whereas the meds alone did not seem to.  That said, it may also be because I am off the meds that made my psoriasis worse...couldn't say with scientific certainty.

After that, I kinda did nothing all day.  What can I say?  I needed it.  Still tired, but hoping tomorrow I will feel alive again.

I have a question about cleaning a brush I have.  Now, pls nobody yell at me!!  Remember I inherited this brush and it is 200 years old!!!  I do not advocate this type of thing.  It is a vanity set brush like you see the woman in old movies using.  Here is why you might freak...the backing is made of tortoise shell (ducking).  The backing and the brush part are held together with good silver.  I suspect the bristles are made of boar hair.  I have had it for about 10 years and never used it...but I tried it about 2 months ago and discovered it was the best brush I had ever used.  It is perfect for my hair...but if I use it, I must clean it...and I am worried about damaging it.  When I clean the silver every month, I have to oil the tortiose shell.  I am not worried about the silver, just the shell.  Any suggestions?

Well, better run. Time to eat.  Tired still.

Actually, that sounds like a beautiful brush. My best friend's mother when I was growing up, had a silver vanity brush like that, with a matching silver mirror and comb. I don't know anything about cleaning it, however.

K,

Thanx, it is actually beautiful.  It does not have a comb, but it has the mirror and a tray to put the brush and mirror on.  They all match.  I know they  must be worth a small fortune...which is the other reason I want to figure out a safe way to clean the brush before  use it to much.  After all, they are old, in perfect condition and being made of tortoise shell (which has been illegal for over 50 years due to the endangered species thing).  It is dark brown because of the shell, but matches my mahogonay bedroom really well.  Maybe I will take a photo of it to show people.

Did NOTHING today, but still feel beat.  Still, going to go back into the garage and work tomorrow...must be done.  Damn this disease.

As for the hair conversation, somewhere in this forum, I said I suspected that the size of the oil components of the oils we used to oil our hair (how many times can I put oil in this sentence!) is more important than the nutrients it supplies.  While I have not proven this theory to any degree, some research today showed me this (based on the three oils I checked since I use them):  cocunut oil is molecularily medium size:  cocoa butter or oil 'seems' to be large....got conflicting data here....: BUT apparently, jojoba oil is the same size as sebum!!!  One would presumbably assume that jojoba is best then...but I have to say, my hair seems to like coconut better.  Perhaps it depends on the individual, or perhaps I need to rethink my nutrition thoughts.....I have no idea...maybe after I am finished my garage, I will investigate that more.

Still, in the meantime, if anyone has suggestions about cleaning my brush (see previous entry) would love to hear it.

JD

BTW, I am mad at me for not washing my hair until 9 pm when I am tired because I wanted clean towels and turbie twists.  Now I have to stay up 2 hours before I can oil my hair (tonight is jojoba oil...I alternate).  Grr, since I am up at 6 tomorrow.  Silly me!!!  What we do for our hair!!!

JD

I would try looking for an antiques dealer that specializes in such things.  Of course, what they will tell you is to stop using it immediately to preserve it.  But they might have an idea on cleaning.  

Unfortunately, I don't have any idea as to how to clean your brush either.  My grandmother had a beautiful silver set as well but without the tortise shell.

I think your hair type determines what type of oil works best for you.  Typically those with fine hair need lighter oils and coarser hair types need thicker oils.

wrote on Jun 16^th, 2007 at 12:12am:

I think your hair type determines what type of oil works best for you.  Typically those with fine hair need lighter oils and coarser hair types need thicker oils.

LD, I have been pondering that exact thing, however, I have found that with my extremely fine hair, the medium weight oil works best, not the light.  I have no explanation for this....ahh, maybe I do....my hair is grey...which changes the texture somewhat from when it was not.  Perhaps that is the reason.  Geez, that is an obvious solution.  Sorry for thinking out loud folks.

I saw something today that I have to tell you all about.  I thought it was adorable.  First I have to set the scene though, especially for those of you that do not live in Canada.

I live in the country.  The nearest convenience store (which is so terrible I will not buy a thing there) is 6 km away.  After that...I have to go 20 km in to town.  Now, in town (not the city, town) we have a big box grocery store.  Here in Canada, these stores set up a garden center at this time of year which is always close to an island of grass.  Now the scene is set.

So, today I go to get some groceries from the big box store, and as I drive in, I see a guy tying up his horse next to the garden center.  I assumed it was for some publicity thing.  I resisted all urges to buy carrots for the horse while I was in the store (having owned horses myself...in the past  :'(.  wish I still did).  So, when I came out of the store, I just had to look back at the horse and there was the guy loading his saddle bags with groceries!!!  And I watched him ride out!!!  Over 30 years of living in the country I have never seen that.  When I had horses I would ride to the convenience store and I see that with my crumby little store here...but this was something I had never seen before....SO GREEN WITH ENVY.  Want to have a horse to ride there myself!!! :(  Well, if kids aren't in my future, maybe having my own horse again is.  OHH I hope so.  One day I will tell you all why I have nothing to do with horses...think alchoholic or gambler...just with horses.

Just thought I would share that with you all.  Sure says something for the environmentally friendly, doesn't it!!!  

That's funny! ;D   I have a mental picture of the guy looking like Matt Dillon from Gun Smoke.

LOL, I have to admit, he was not THAT cute, but he was wearing a cowboy hat!!!  And he was not hard to look at...to be honest...Darn, should have bought the carrots now I think about it!!!  He would have cursed me though...feeding animals with a bit in their mouths makes for a lot of work...but then again, maybe I would have been cute enough to put up with it?  Blonde, blue and 5'2 as my hubby used to say.  Ok, forget it.  Got too fat.  Catch me in a few months though!!!

That's neat!  I always said if I moved up to Caledon I would get a donkey and ride to the general store!  I haven't has a horse in years either, maybe one day ::)

This is for our site founder Susan,


As a small part of my disease, I suffer from agoraphobia.  I am lucky...when I am well I can get to my little office (at 6:30 am) and I do not have to see people.  When I do have to deal with people because of my work...well, I have a prescription for valium...at a high dose.

Today I had to see over 4 couples...in my home...stunning for me...that is a year supply for me.

The first thing after a hug from the women was them touching my hair and telling me how shiney and beautiful it was.  Now I am not quite BSL, but these woman know that my meds...well sorry to be tactless...screw my hair.

The first thing they all asked me was what products I was using for my hair because it was so 'long and beatulfri;' some my meds do seriously mess with my hair ( 3 years ago I had to chop it to about 1 inch because the meds made it like straw).  Now, thanx to this site I am using the recipes that YOU, the members of this site give me....coconut, avacado, aloe, jojoba oil, cocnout oil, cocoa oil, etc... and my friends think that my hair is a whole lot better than theirs.  YOU the members have helped me find things for my hair that I can afford and do much better than anything I have bought before.


I thank you all for what you have told me...and will continue to learn...but most of all, I have to say Thank You to Susan...had you not made this site free for discussion...I would never have learned what I have in the short month I have been here.  Yes, I have over 2 years to be a Rapunzil, but thanx to the free access that Susan has given me....I might be able to....for the first time in 20 years of being on these awful meds, grow my hair so its really nice, classical length.  

Susan, I solute you for this gift.  Thank you for this site...you are a wonder.  And thank you to all who contibute.

JD

We're all here for the common cause, Jdog.

Thank you for being here with us. You rock, sistah!  ;)

J-dog,
I was out of town for the weekend, and off the site. Now I just caught up on your journal. I'm jealous that I don't have cowboys riding horses at my grocery store. LOL. I also love riding and horses, but have never owned one, so I know what you mean about wishing you could run errands on a horse.
As for having you on the site, I love reading your journals and hearing about your success! It encourages me too and I've got a least two years of growing to get to any real length. Also, I have really bad eczema and other skin issues, so I enjoy these all natural suggestions and recipes on the site too.

Thank you ladies for your kind words.  I should warn you, the typing might not go well here, I have a dog helping me.  LOL.  She is kinda cute.

I forgot to mention last night that I have FINALLY finished the mudding and sanding of my garage dry wall.  I had a lot to do today, such as cut my grass, etc so no work in the garage today.  Tomorrow it will be 32 C which is too hot to be in there, plus I am going out for lunch with my work tomorrow which will take up 4 hours smack in the middle of the day.  Weds I will prime it, Thursday I will reprime it and hopefully on Friday I will paint it.  I am painting some shelves black to go up in the garage.  I hope to have them done by Friday so that on Sat I can finally put my garage together.  My husband is going to seal the floor and put up rubber 'baseboard' next month so the garage can be hosed out without damaging the drywall.  LOL, he told me that we should eat dinner on the garage floor then and take a pic because then everyone will know that my garage is finally sparkling clean.  Um, I should mention, I am a bit of a clean freak.

I had a terrible shock this morning though.  During the night one of my cats knocked a glass of OJ off my bedroom window ledge (I never keep it on the night stand since that always results in the animals knocking it over).  My bedroom is carpeted and I did not notice when I first got up (dogs rushing to go out and 5 animals wanting food tends to give me tunnel vision until that is done).  When I came into the bedroom to make the bed I saw the spill  AND about 30 tiny ants cleaning it up for me.  Gasp!!!  I have an ant nest somewhere in my bedroom.  

Of course my first thought was to vacuum up the ants and clean the mess up...but then common sense prevailed.  I have to kill the queen to do this (and I am not expecting her to stop and pay me a visit for tea) so I need those little worker ants to work for me.  Having 5 animals in the house, pesticides are not a plan.  So, i mixed a 50/50 mix of icing sugar and baking soda and placed it over the juice.  The ants will take this mix back to the queen to eat and she will literally blow up because most bugs cannot expell gas.  Then the colony will die.  So, now as I look over at the patch I did this with, I have about 100 little ants busy collecting it.  Ugh.  Hopefully this will not take more than a couple of days...I dunno.  I have never had to do this before.

As for the stain, well, I was planning on steam cleaning my carpets next week before I go back to work and after all this reno stuff I have been doing.

BTW, my neighbour tells me she has been infested by these little ants this summer too.  We think that maybe they have come in on the dogs coats.  I suspect this because (while I am not 100% sure where the nest is) I do know it is close to the dog beds.  Why else would they be in the bedroom and not the kitchen or closer to it?

I hope everyone is having a great day.  Take care all.

JD

wrote on Jun 17^th, 2007 at 8:26pm:

This is for our site founder Susan, Susan, I solute you for this gift.  Thank you for this site...you are a wonder.  And thank you to all who contibute. JD

Awwww JD, you are MORE than welcome!  I am so happy the site has helped you out and brightened your days.  Your post certainly brightened mine!  :)

j-dog, wow, that is quite and anti-ant plan! i've never heard of having them blow up from too much sugar and icing, but i hope it works. i've had a lot of ants this summer so far, which is odd, since i'm on the second floor of a city apartment. but we've had our seventeen year cicadas surfacing this summer, so the ants are fleeing to higher ground to avoid being food for them. i found an ant in my bed the other day, oddly enough, not anywhere near the kitchen. i don't use pesticide either in the house, as my fluffy cat eats ants. she actually finds little trails of them and walks behind them licking them off the floor! and i do feed her enough cat food, so i think it's just a hobby of hers to keep her busy in between her other important cat duties: sleeping, cleaning her fur, eating, getting pet and playing with her toy mouse.  and now i haven't seen any ants, except right by my front window and our balcony. since this is an old building, i think they come in through the space between the floor and baseboard.  

and btw, you should post more hair pix!

Roomtogrow,

I am sure you feed your cat enough!!  It is just a fun little game for the little guy/gal.

It is not the sugar that does it, it is the baking soda, but ants will not take the baking soda unless you make it sweet.  That is why you do a 50/50 mix with icing sugar.  Actually last night as I watched them, I couldn't decide if they were taking my little recipe or the stain, so I clean it all up including the oj.  I then found the attraction was not so great.  Sooooo, I mixed the baking soda with liquid honey (which I would have done in the first place had I realized I had honey).  Well, I put out abut 2 tsp of this mix and it was gone by morning.  Today I found the place they are coming from (floor boards as you mentioned) made another batch and put it right outside the hole they come up.  Lord there are hundreds of the things....and I did give in and vacuum a bunch of them up.  I also dropped this tasty little treat in the kitchen to see what would happen.  None in the kitchen it seems...just in my darned bedroom...so tomorrow I am going to very seriously inspect my window but I may have to think about keeping something on it to kill entering ants as I can't imagine finding a hole that small (these guys are only about 3 mm long and 1 mm thick).  Hopefully my theory that the queen came in on a dog is right and once I get this little infestation done...it will be over....Pls God, pls.

JD

be gone ants!  ;D
hope your ant problem is gone soon. well, i'm off to get some coffee and read a book after a frustrating start to the day, which i'll probably compain about in my journal later.  :)

wrote on Jun 24^th, 2007 at 10:24pm:

wrote on Jun 24th, 2007 at 10:50am: Wow, Joeydog. I really wish there were a way to make certain people unable to obtain pets, like the way there are screenings for adoptions, because some people just shouldn't have them. . LD, here is a story for you.  We will have to go a long way to make laws about pets...they are considered possessions.  But you talk about adoption.   My husband is infertile.  We started the whole process for artificial inseminition ( well I had to do all the test including a 22 inch catheter put in my uterus....sorry guys, don't mean to offend anyone).  Oneof the other tests was a psych profile on both of us.  I am eligible to do this procedure for 12 months...despit the fact that my husband and I split.  We love each other ...but he feels entitled and I believe we work for what we get in life....LOL we are the same social class and all...just cannot agree on work or home ethics... Anyway...I refuse to go ahead because I believe that a child should have both parents...at least to start...since we can not gaurentee (sp?) that the parents will stay together.  It is my life dream to have a child...but I cannot do it morally without a father there. I am turning 39 in the next couple of months...and I cannot imagine getting involved with a man, finding him to be right and marrying him before my time for having children is up.  I mean, I cannot see dating for a year since hubby and I have split, and then I would not want to except a marriage proposal until I had dated for at least 2 years...and then the time for the wedding...so I would be at least 43!!  I know women do it...and if I can...I will....but than is if a guy I like shows up in the next year!!! Now, don't get me wrong...I believe I will find the right man....but here is where I am going...if I meet him when I am 45 and cannot have kids...even if he agreed an adoption agency would refuse me.  Oh I can meet the rooming thing ( one room per kid), in my mortgaged house, I can pull up enough salary for them...and as you will know you do not have to be married to adopt...but I have a disease they do not like.... I have a kitty named Yoda.  He came to me at 5 days of age (eyes and ears still closed) to be euthed.  I convinced the owner to sign him over to me instead.  I fed this little persian EVERY 2 hours ( they don't cry for it like a baby and you just go when then cry), 24 hours a day.  Everyone said he would die.  He has been with me 8 years now.  I worked 16 hours a day when I took him in (in a clinic so he could come with me...lol, in my pocket).  He got his name because when I fed him his baby bottle his ears waggled like Yoda from Starwars.  Tell me I would not look after  child...but the adoption agency would say no.  Is that fair? But just anyone can adopt an animal. JD JD

Yeah, you're right about having a long way to go with the animal adoption process.  It's just way too easy to adopt an animal and they're too easy to obtain and unfortunately, disgard because people don't spay and neuter the way they should. :(

And I don't get the whole animals are possession thing.  Just like if you fly with an animal they stick them under the plane with the luggage.  Animals can die down there.  And if something does happen, you have no recourse because they're just animals or possesions.  It's absolutely crazy.

When I got custody of my mothers cat after she passed, it was a very difficult road because I already had two cats and they didn't take too kindly to my moms cat at all.  It was very frustrating for us all and I didn't think I'd be able to keep the new cat.  After my mothers friends and my sister who don't have any animals declined to take him, I called my local shelter for assistance.  I asked if they could help me place him in a good home and they said they would evaluate him and if he didn't prove to be adoptable, (because they said it's easier to place kittens and he was 6 at the time)  they would euthanize him.:o  I then asked if they could go ahead with the evaluation and if he didn't prove adoptable, to call me so I could pick him up but they said no.  They said once I signed him over that I no longer had any rights to him and that I couldn't even call to see if he was okay.  I couldn't even bear that thought so I kept him.  I'm glad I did because even though he and my one cat still don't get along and she's still at times stressed by the situation, we have made a good home for him here.  But, I still can't understand why they would be so quick to euthanize if I agreed to take him back if they couldn't place him.  One would think that they would do everything possible to save a life.

Now tell me this, why can't a 45 year old woman adopt?  I can't imagine what the reasoning for this could be.  No one tells a 45 year old man that he can't procreate.

Sorry to be so slow in replying joeydog (from Kiraela's forum) but thanks for your very thoughtful and detailed reply to my question what it must take to succeed as a vet? I just know I could never do it, the more so now.

I've no idea if animals are considered property here in the UK or not but I did rather suspect something along the overall lines you described, though not about vets unable to cope and sadly taking such an awful final step. So I take your point about better the vet dealing with the final sad solution rather than the owner. And in a way I can now understand a possible need or motive for some or many (?) vets to want to concentrate on the income sides as it must help to take their mind off things ?

Overall I guess anaesthetizing the mind seems the best answer to the emotional/ clarity of mind mix for animal lovers whether owners or vets. Certainly the pub in modest doses can help too…

Oh I'm a guy btw lol no wonder your reaction !  ;D

Cadie

Oops, so sorry Cadie, I wondered if you were male when you said you were 6'4.   :-[  I am glad I could answer some questions for you thought.

LD, I agree with you entirely.

I am too tired to say too much tonight.  I wanted to come on to say that tomorrow I have to go to the dreaded hairdresser....although mine seems pretty good.  I will be interested to see if she sees a difference in my hair since I have not seen her since joining LL.  I want her to trim the 0.5 inches of uneven hair...but I don't see any split ends so I am hoping that is all she will need to take.  I color my hair so tomorrow my roots will be done so I am doing a store bought deep conditioner tonight to make sure that it takes well and that it does not do too much damage to my hair.  My hair dresser does a 15 minute deep condition after the color and before the cut so that helps too.

I have been really busy...and will be until Monday.  I will give you all a run down then but I am tired and want to look what other people are doing right now rather than writing about me.  Take care all.

JD

Good luck at the hairdresser. :)  Have you ever considered coloring with henna?

jd-how did the hair dresser go?

LD, I know NOTHING about henna.  Maybe I need someone to give me a crash course.  I thought henna was to make hair dark...I am going from grey to blonde and I worry too about how I get henna to the right shade of blonde...too blonde washes me out...too brown does the same...I can really only move within 2 shades. If I could I would have brown hair!!!

Anyway, if anyone out there wants to give me a crash course on henna...I could sure use a cheaper and healthier way of doing it.

JD

Hey, thanx for asking Roomtogrow.  I am out to lunch on a decision about my hair appt.  She did the roots really nicely.  That looks good.  She fixed my bangs (I need bangs...my forehead is quite high) .She evened out the end since my Mum told me that I had some straggly bits that were about 0.5 inches longer than the main hair growth and she trimmed a little to take care of any split ends.  I told her not to dry and style it for me...  She even used my wood comb from Ric the Combmaker to save breakage when she had to comb it out to cut it.  And she told me it is very healthy and I am doing all the right things.

Last night I did a deep condition overnight and I am trying to decide what conditioning would do it the best tonight.

Why I say I am out to lunch on my decision about my hair is that it seems frizzy and shorter now.  That said, there is actually a humidity warning out today where I live so the humidity could be the cause for the frizzy thing and my hair curls more when it is humid so that might explain why it is feeling shorter.

Actually, a question came up for me at the dresser today which I would love an answer too.  I usually do let her dry and style my hair and not doing so is fine right now in the hot summer.  Winter will come though and in the depths of winter my  hair will freeze within 2 minutes of walking out of the dresser...which cannot be good for my hair and I know is not good for me.  What do other people in really cold climates do?  Do you let the stylist blow dry it, wrap it all up in a ski hat?  What do you do?

JD

Joeydog, I found this excerpt on the henna for hair site...

I wanted to post this here as I don't think this is a well-known fact. I first read about this over on the long hair community forum and I told my sister about it since she is a blonde and getting some early gray hair. She is now successfully covering her grays with this mix.

Here's the recipe:

One tablespoon of Catherine's henna

One tablespoon of Catherine's indigo

Mix them both with a light conditioner and let set thirty minutes. Apply to hair and leave on for 45 minutes. Wash out.

Her grays turned a very light blonde and just look like lighter highlights in her hair. She's been doing this for several months now and loves it. She does this about once a month.

My only advice is don't even think of doing this with anything less than Catherine's henna as who knows what you would end up with.

Thanx LD.  I will look into it.

JD

JD-my hair's not very long yet, but I'm in a cold climate (Very cold and windy) when it is winter here. during that time, i shampoo at night and gently towel dry, then sleep with it on a clean towel. it dries over night so it doesn't freeze when i go to work next morning. the only problem with this, is that now as it's growing out all weird and short, i don't like how it lays in the morning. when it's longer i'm sure it would work a little better from the weight of the hair holding it down.

Hello All.  I have been so busy, all I have had time to do is check on other people's journals rather than my own.

I have finished the garage, at least until I seal the floor and put rubber around the bottom of the dry wall so I am able to hose the garage out without damaging the walls.  That is planned for September.  All these things cost money!!

The house has had a really good clean.  The walls have been washed down, the carpets cleaned, the windows done and I have cleaned out all but 2 closets in the house.  I will get those over the week.  I even pulled everything out of the crawl space and cleaned that all up.  My basement is not finished (stay tuned...that is in a couple of years I hope) but I did scrub down the cement floor.  I do that about once a year because of the animals hanging out down there.

Saturday my sister and I spent the day together cooking and made up about 45-50 individual dinners for each of us.  Much cheaper and healthier than buying premade meals.  They are now frozen in my big freezer for when I go back to work.  Oh ya, have I mentioned yet that I am going back to work on July 16th.  Finally.

As for my ants...I got it down to seeing one or two feeding for days and thought I had it licked.  I guess some breeding happened before I put down the lethal food because I went to get rid of the ant feed today to discover about 100 ants there.  GRRR.  Okay folks, if I have not gotten rid of this problem before I go back to work, I am pulling out the big guns.  Yup, pesticides :o!!!

Ok, I know, you are all going to be nice and smart and tell me the risks, especially with the animals.  I appreciate that and I think it would be a good things...except...well as you all know, I used to be a vet.  I mentioned I was a toxicologist.  Well, I study pesticides so I figure I have all this covered.  

And just so you all know, I do not believe in the cosmetic use of pesticides (lawns, etc) but trust me that we would be in a lot of trouble without pesticides.  Every year we have molds and bugs try to take out crops.  I mean these things are huge and lethal.  Think of a mold taking more than half the wheat crops on the praries (for you North Americans).  People would starve, cattle would starve (leaving lots of dead rotting caracasses for farmers with no income to dispose of the cattle), the deaths would cause new bacteria to form and that would become lethal, etc...  And if you think that 'pesticides' haven't always been used...think of creosote which thousands used because it was natural...and happens to be banned now because it is VERY carcinogenic.  Natural is not always better.  At least I work for an Agency that makes sure that things are safe for the public.  It is all to long to explain here unless someone wants a run down so I will shorten it by saying this...I look at these studies and determine if they are something I would let my family near (including my 4 legged ones) when I am regulating them.  Oh, just in case anyone forgot, I have no shares in these products (forbidden under gov't rules) and do not produce them.  I review the data, place safety factors and determine if they should be allowed on the market at all.  Just so you all know (and I know this applies in Australia, NZ, Cnd, US and the UK) even once I have reviewed the data and made a decision, I must present the data to 2 separate commitees and get them to agree with me....meaning, no single person does the decision.  Ok, enough about defending myself.  

Hair has nothing interesting to report.  Still waiting to measure my hair in July (which I could do any time now) so I can figure if my hairdresser took off more than I wanted.  I like to get my mom to measure it since doing it on my own I always get different lengths each time I measure.   :-[  

My hair does seem much healthier since I have joined LL.  I am grateful to everyone here for that, as you have all helped me so.

As for my weight, notice the ticker is not going down.  In fact I have not weighed lately since I am afraid that it is going up.  Grr.  Oh well, once I get back to work it should start to drop.  My meals will be much better planned, I will be dying to walk or run at lunch to get out for a little, and then there are the floors and floors of stairs (I don't use the elavators so I can burn calories).  

Ok, this is a long entry.  Sorry folks.  I think I will go do an avacado/coconut milk and jojoba oil deep condition and maybe a facial.  BTW, I have liquid Vitamin E here for my poor Joey.  Does anyone know if putting that into the deep conditioning mixes I do will help my hair?

JD

jdog, i like your rants that you go into (i.e. the pesticide one) ;D very informative and i like how they just come out in your posts..
congrats on finishing the garage! that sounds like a huge project that you should feel pretty darn good about finishing.
i don't know about vitamin e on the hair, but i do know that when i took as a daily sup. in college, it seemed to improve my skin texture-which at the time was part oily part dry.  

oh and don't be discouraged about the weight. sometimes it just hits a plateau and then moves down again soon. keep up your good work!

Thanx rtg.   You are kind.

JD

Today was nothing special.  I took Joey to an Old Folks Home to do a visit and cheer them up.  He liked it and I know they did!!  I wish I could get Joey back into that (he is a certified Canine Good Citizen) but I think it is too much for him on a regular basis.  Maybe I will look into something once in a while.

I went to see the folks.  Dad is quite ill...but will recover.  I did a few jobs for them that they can't.  Parents (or perhaps I should qualify with 'good' parents) are great.

I did go for a nice massage today.  It was much needed and relaxing.  My massage therapist has been trying for a couple of years to have kids and has had to very nasty miscarriages that almost killed her.  She found out last night that she is going to Africa to adopt a little 4 month old boy.  LOL, I thought only pregant women glowed.  She is so happy.  I am very happy for her, but I cannot help feeling envy.

My hair got a trim this month and apparently was cut enough that no length has been gained this month.  Sigh.  Oh well.  And just to add to things, that darned psoriasis is back.  So, I have just greased my scalp with the darned medication and think I will do a EVOO infused with rosemary treatment tonight on my little ponytail.  Hey, I have to wash my hair tomorrow with that awful tar shampoo anyway, even though it is not a wash day.  

I try to remind myself that this horrible bout with the disease will be a memory in a year, I will be thin again, I will have another 6 inches of hair (I hope).  Patience right?

BTW, I had asked about Vitamin E on hair.  Someone said that taken internally it is good (which is true) but nobody seemed sure on hair.  I did some research and found it does work topically for some people but is hard to wash out.  Last night I added a bit to my avacado/coconut milk/jojoba oil and sweet almond oil mix.  I liked the results.  I did not even do an AVC to rinse it out.  My hair was soft and shiney after.  I think I will keep doing that, although I just realized I forgot to put cocoa butter in my mix.  Oops.

I think I will go on Ebay and see about a couple more satin pillow slips.  I do rather like them.  LOL, so do my animals.  Maybe one day I will buy sheets to match them.  One day...but not today...for everything must be earned, one step at a time.

JD

Ok, change in plans.  Shower cap had not dried after last nights deep condition (didn't have time to rinse it and set it to dry) so instead of the EVOO treatment I put cocao butter on my pony tail.  I have not seen anyone talk about doing that...but I LOVE it. My hair is so shiney and soft after.   But then I am a cocoa butter addict.  I use it on my skin...ya try it ladies...my hubby told me I had the softest skin he had ever felt.  WARNING...as funny as it sounds, the smell makes me crave chocolate so I never keep any chocolate in the house and the nearest store is 20 km away so it works out ok for me.    :-[ Ok, I admit it...My name is Joeydog and I am a chocoholic.  

JD

hehe! I have to hide any chocolate that comes in the house from my boyfriend... he's even worse than me with that. Me: self control, only eats 4 hersheys kisses at a time. him: eats whole bag. looks for more.  ;D

Actually, I didn't think of this last night but the real Joey had a run in with chocolate once. It was hilarious (but sad).  I had just finished school and went home to the folks for a few months when I moved back to Ottawa (I love my parents).  I left for work around 6 and my parents got up and ate breakfast around 8.  My mom was watching Joey and noticed he seemed disoriented and to lack some control over his limbs.  My parents began to think he might have had a small stroke after I left that morning.  They were trying to decide whether to phone me and bring him in to me to check out when mom went downstairs to put a load of laundry in.  When mom got downstairs she figured out what was up.  Dad had left a box of brandy chocolate beans on the floor next to his chair.  Joey found it and Joey was DRUNK!!  

Anyway. mom called me to make sure he hadn't eaten enough to suffer chocolate toxicity or anything.  Then the folks stayed with him for a couple of hours until it passed.  Happily, he was not unhappy, just a bit odd for a couple of hours.  

We have all heard "Wait 'til your father gets home!".  Mom told Dad "Wait 'til you daughter gets home!!".

Poor Joey.  Don't get me wrong, I would never wish any animal drunk...but since he was...I wish I had seen it.

I hope I don't bore you all with my little animals stories.  I do miss working with animals.  

I have nothing to report on the hair front right now.  I need to wash it with that terrible tar shampoo but I woke up with a REALLY sore neck.  I can hardly move.  I am hoping it is just because of the way I slept and as I move around it will go away.

And Kiraela, I have no self control with chocolate, I would be like your hubby.  When my hubby and I were courting, he used to bring me belgian chocolates all the time.  I had to tell him to stop, I was gaining too much weight.   ::)

JD

Well, one week from today I will be preparing things so I can go back to work on the Monday.  Half of me can't wait.  I have worked out my budget so that I should pay everything off after being off work for 8 months by about April and I hope to take off the extra weight by then too so that this is just a bad memory.  The other half of me is terrified. What if I relapse?  What if I cannot manage everything anymore?  You know, all those little fears and a lot of anxiety coming up. I will be glad when the re-adjusting time is over.  That said, I do not want to wish the summer away.  I so love summer.  Fall is pretty but with the hour change, the shorter days and the pending freezing temperatures and short days (did I mention short days?) bother me.  My health is at its worst in the winter.

I put coconut oil on my hair last night.  I was woken up at 2 by a kitty trying to lick it all off.  I guess he likes coconut oil.  I figure 1) it is not good to have his little raspy tongue on my hair and 2) coconut is a laxative so I don't think I should let him do that.  I might have to put it up in my satin sox when I oil it like that and hope I can get the oil out of the sox with baking soda.

I have a few hair questions;  actually, hair accessory questions.  I was speaking with someone about  Holly Marie Combs yesterday and it came up that some of her hair do'es were quite nice.  One I loved was the hair sleeve.  So, the first question is:  will they damage my hair being made of leather?  The second question is (assuming that they will not damage my hair) where can I get one without the celtic symbol on it indicating it is a "Charmed" prop?

The next question is about where I can get hold of snoods?  I don't sew.  I am useless on the artistic level.  I am a scientist...pure and simple.  Can anyone tell me where I can buy them?

Thanx for your help as always,

JD

go j-dog! you can do it!

LOL, thanks RTG, I will call on you when I get down on life.  You are sooo cute (and yes I am a woman and do love men...just so no one takes that wrong).

JD

Quote:

I put coconut oil on my hair last night.  I was woken up at 2 by a kitty trying to lick it all off.

ROFL    ;D  This reminds me of something my cats would do!!

As to the anxiety you're feeling  *hugs*  Stop, take a deep breath, hold it for a second, and then release it slowly (repeat often, if necessary).  There's no sense in worrying about things that may or may not happen.  All it does is waste time and energy, and make us sick.  Just take each day as they come, and let tomorrow take care of itself.   :)

lol, joeydog-no misunderstanding here. and you are right, i am cute! jk.  ;D
anyway, in a similar experience, my cat tries to lick my facial moisturizer off at night, since it's all natural and made of flower extract.

Sigh.  Long day ahead today and I am not into it at all.  I thought I had everything under control so that I would be home around 3, but that isn't going to happen now.

I have to go to the hospital from 9-11 this morning.  That promises to be painful.  I will have to leave here at 7 to make it.  It is a 1 hour drive when it is not rush hour, but I can't get into worse rush hour traffic.  I had thought my appointments started at 10 so I had planned on going in to work before the hospital, but that wont work now with the time of my appt.  When I am at work under normal circumstances, I start at 7, but today  I need IT to come and set up my computer for me and they do not get in until 8 so going in before 8 would just be a waste of my time.  Clearly, I cannot contact them, get them to my desk and have them done by 8:30 when I would have to leave for the hospital!!  No point in going in for 8 the way my hospital appointments are.

I am being taken out for lunch right after my hospital appointments.  I wish I could say that is a good thing, but it isn't really.  My friends have good intentions and are taking me out in celebration of my birthday which is kind, but there are 2 problems.  The first is that one of the people that is coming I can't stand.  He is always trying to touch me and act like we are dating or something.  He turns my stomach.  On the bright side, I am hoping to cut all ties with him after today.  

The second problem is that I am feeling some what agoraphobic and and socialphobic and of course they have chosen a buffet just to add to my problems.  A quiet table would have been easier on me as opposed to having to get up and go through a line with strangers.

I probably wont get to work until 2.  I had liked the 8 am thing.  Less people to run into.  When you have been away from work a while and come back, everyone wants to be nice and say hi.  Like I said, not up for that really.  Plus, having just realized that I wont get to work until around 2, I just figured out I will be lucky to be home by 5.  Chances are IT will take upwards of 45 minutes to show up, then about 30 minutes to get the computer up and running and then I will have to do some quick paper work on the computer so that I get a pay check when I get back.  I probably wont get out of there until 4...and once again be trapped in rush hour.  Ugh.  This is why I work 7-3, so I can avoid rush hour.

I had wanted to cut my lawn and edge my flower beds today.  It is not likely as things stand...not enough hours in the day and of course it is darned well raining out there.

Sigh, I am not doing well with the determination to get the rest of my life together here.  Hopefully once I get out there it will not be as bad as I am thinking it will be.  I guess the best why to find out is to get on with it.  Ya know, a year ago I loved going to work.  I hope that feeling comes back soon.

JD

It'll be ok. :) Just breathe and try to relax.  Sometimes just deep breathing will help ya out.  Tonight you can look back and say you made it through.  Keep your eye on the "end of the tunnel",you'll do just fine!  I know you will!! ;)

yeah j-dog you'll get through it. also at work, wear a head set  even if you aren't listening to anything-maybe folks will think you are busy.  :) best of luck

Thank you ladies for your support.  RTG, you make me laugh.  I am so grateful you write the things you do.  Today went worse than I anticipated....bs for the most part...but today I want to 'rant' about something else.

"Pride cometh before the fall".  I wrote that to a member about a month ago because I was concerned that they were not asking for help when they might need it.  I have noticed that the member has not made a comment on my journal (which the used to) and that the member has not discussed thing relating to the topic I said that about.  I was not trying to tell them that they were to full of pride, but to think about it...Now, I still stand by what I said, but just to show I am not a hypocrit (sp?) I want to talk about me doing the pride before the fall.

Sorry, I have to do a bit of history here...and I will really try to be short...but I have some doubts...

As you all know, my hubby and I are split...why...well, when my disease started up again (I don not have cancer but I go in out of remission like cancer) and the pain was unbareable, he ran up the bills, did nothing (and I mean NOTHING around the house and said I was to much of a ... well it rhymes with witch) to deal with.    Ya, I could be a witch...but the pain was terrible and I was trying to work (and I was out an hour longer than him every day), pay off his bills (did I mention he had 2 bankruptcies (sp)) and run the house alone.  Not pretty.  Anyway, he ran home to Mommy (yes he is 49 and has lived there most of his life).  Now that I am getting better again, he wants back.

Now, I am not letting him back.  My disease will come back and if he cannot be there for me unless I am the "Rock" then I cannot deal with it.  There is no future in that.  What if I did get cancer, or need a heart surgery or something...would he run home to mom until I was well.

So, 2 days ago I told him to come and get the rest of his stuff on Sunday and be on his way.  (Thankfully the house, my car, and everything I own and he has no claims on it as I covered myself before we married and was actually able to claim that he was a tenant due to his bankruptcies.  All I had to prove was that my finincial obligations had not been covered by his ... corruption of creditors, which I kept all my reciepts for and could prove).

Now, as I mentioned, I had said he was...lazy.  Since I bought this house almost 3 years ago, I have had certain jobs for him which I felt were 'man' jobs...things like drywalling the garage, wiring electricity into my crawl space and stuff like that.  

Well, he never did it and I have done most of those jobs myself over the past 2 months...but here comes the point, having got the history out of the way...

Tonight I found myself walking around the house figuring out the few jobs I had not done (all of which would take me about 2 full days).  I suddenly got it in my head that I could have that done before he comes to get his stuff on Sunday.  

Now, if you have been following my journal... you know I am going back to work for the first time in 8 months (due to illness) on Monday.  I need to rest...but because of pride, I thought about busting my....behind instead of resting.  Wrong answer, JD!!!  The hospital is concerned about me working 8 hours a day 3 days a week as it is...I do not need to wear myself down before then.

"Pride cometh before the fall".  JD does not need help with these things...but JD will put herself back if she follows her pride to show someone she is ok alone.  Tonight I remind myself that my pride could hurt me too.

Pride has many forms...today that was my form...and today I accept that my pride was going to get the best of me...and I am withdrawing.  We ALL ( I don't not care who you are) let pride govern us at times.  Today I am pleased to say...I know my pride was getting out of hand...and I stand down.

To the member I wanted to have this read...pls, start talking about the things you used to talk about...I was not judging you and I do not believe anyone here does either...we all have our moments...This was mine.

JD

Aww, JD.

All I can say is you go, girl!

Sorry that your ex was such a  :-X  and didn't stick with you when you needed him most. I'm not sure if you follow the bible, but there's a passage in there that says love believes, hopes and endures all things. A guy who bails out on you at the first sign of trouble is not the right one. Believe me, I have been there!

If you can do what needs to be done around the house on your own, then you're better off. Otherwise, I would suggest hiring out rather than relying on your ex to take care of things. He's already proven that he can't be depended upon.
   Some guys are just totally spineless and can't manage anything on their own. I'm sorry that someone like that ever believed that he deserved to marry you. Try not to fault yourself too much for giving him a chance. He's the one who blew it.

In any case, you're an independent woman who doesn't need the assistance of someone like him. But it's also good that you know your limitations and don't let yourself get overburdened. Trying to take on more than you can in a day only leads to disappointment. Trust me, I have some experience there as well.

I hope that things clear up for you soon, JD. Just remember that life is a continuous stream of phases, none of which are permanent. Remind yourself that "this, too, shall pass" and clear skies are ahead. Hang in there, dearie. *hugz*

I have to agree with Angel... If he cut and ran when you were ill, and now wants back... well.. he reminds me of a fish I had named Bofess (short for Bottom feeding scum sucker  :P)

And even if one is not religious.. that passage still should be the guide to life and love! If you can't find a romantic partner that will be there for you through all things... good AND bad... at least know you have friends who love you and will support you.   ;D *hug* I'm glad you realized what a lousy chit he was.

Thanx for the support ladies.  Life goes on...and so will I!!

Some guys.... http://smilies.sofrayt.com/fdm/pain.gif Thank god your done with him!  (((hugs)))

yeah jd, i think k has aptly named him bomess or whatever the bottom feeder term was. don't overdo it with all the new projects, as you don't want to overwork yourself and make your health decline. man, i'm still impressed with all the garage work you did!  :o
as for the whole pride info, that's totally true. i've been learning that recently as well-job searching for me is a complicated balance of finding peace instead of pride and alternately insecurity!

LOL, I have visions of me calling him Bofess when he is here getting his stuff on the weekend.

I spent some time last night making up one of Curly64's deep conditioning mix and infusing EVOO so that I don't have to worry about such things when I first go to work.  One of my friends who is a gourmet chef called while I was making up my mixes.  He laughed and told me I was like a witch brewing potions.  It made me laugh.

As I have mentioned before, I love Holly Maire Combs.  I watch Charmed religiously actually.  I know, I am probably a bit old for it, but I relate with the character of Piper.  Her obsession with cleaning, family and always striving for a normal life are things I get.  Ok, so I am not a witch...but I feel like I am always struggling for a normal life because of my illness...which is my personal demon to be vanquished!!  So, being compared to a witch made me laugh.

Anyway...I used the Curly64 'potion' today and my hair is great now.  It is nice and soft and shiny.  Thanx Curly.  I still have 3 batches left for once I am at work and maybe I will make more tonight to freeze.

I ordered 5 shampoo bars from Ida of Chagrin and they arrived earlier this week.  Ida was really sweet and put a couple of sample bars in the package for me.  I usually use the Mud and Clay, and sometimes the Neem, both of which I love.  I tried the sample of Rosemary and Mint today.  As is the case with the other bars, it is great.  I love it...but I still feel the Mud and Clay is the best for my hair.  I can't remember what the other sample is...but I will tell you about it when I try it.

RTG, I am flattered that you feel that was a good project for me to have done (garage).  Hopefully in about 2 years I will be posting things about how finishing the basement is driving me nuts.  Oh will I be glad once that is done.  I think next year I will be building a shed...if I can find the money.  Just because I don't have a man here, it doesn't mean I wont get things done as they were planned when he was here!

Quote:

Just because I don't have a man here, it doesn't mean I wont get things done as they were planned when he was here!

Amen, sister! That's the right attitude.
One of my most popular quips right after my divorce was, "I don't need no man's help, shoot."  ;D  That self-reliance will always be with me, and I'm grateful for it.

To ge the full effect, the proper pronunciation of Bofess is something like "boo-fuss"...  ;D so that it rhymes with dufus  ;)

ROFL....boo-rus it is!!!  Thanx K.

JD

You're welcome,JD!  Glad you like the conditioner recipe!  For a hair refresher when you need it,try Prairieland shampoo bars,they have great lather!!!!

Cool, I am going to google those bars right now!!

JD

EEEKKK.  Okay, here comes a rant that is not about hair or educational!!!

My b-day is tomorrow.  I went to get my mail today and found a rainbow of colorful cards...11 to be exact.  I thought, as I walked up the driveway, my friends have this snail mail thing down pat to get them all to me on the last mailing day before my b-day.  Then I started thinking...wait, other than my family (who I will be with tomorrow) I have already got cards from everyone.

Flash back---if you remember, earlier this week I said I had to go for lunch and one of the people coming I could not stand...in fact, he repusles me.  

You got it...all  11 cards are from him!!!  Five of them = one from one of each of my own animals, 2 = cards from each of his two, and the other 4 are from him.   Gawd.

Look, I know the guy is really rich (at least a million and with his mom going to die before Xmas, a multimillionaire) and that his sister (who is the 3rd best brain surgeon in the world and owns a Castle in Scotland and one in Florida) I could find worse guys...but the fact is...I can't stand him.  

We fought 2 nights ago when I told him there has never and will never be anything between us, and he told me ....ugh..."I won't let you go, you are too special."  I told him he never had me to let me go but he can't get it.  AAAAAHHHHHH

About 3 months ago he came over with a group of my friends.  Now I am not confrontational, but after he got to friendly with me in my kitchen in front of our mutual friends...I threw him out of the house with a "Don't ever talk to me again" message.

At 4 in the morning I was woken up by my phone ringing and his name coming up on the call display.  I did not answer, but he called every 10 minutes until 7 am when I finally answered.  He told me I had hurt him so much he had slit his wrists (are you all getting why he freaks me out yet?).  Of course I asked him if he was serious and then called 911 (with no address or anything since I have NEVER been to his house).  911 used his phone number that was on my phone to hunt him down.  He ran from the house knowing they were coming and the cops had to break down his door to figure he was not there.  The found his massive GI Joe set (covers the bottom 5000 sq feet of his house from what they told me) and asked me if he could be armed.  This was a week after the massacre in Virginia so I hardly knew what to say.  The cops spent 12 hours looking for him when he suddenly phoned me from home again!!!!

I told this idiot I had to go to the bathroom and ran outside and called the police on my cell.  They asked me to go back on the phone with him (he was on hold) and to take my cell so they could hear what I was saying.

He kept on going about how he had now taken pills.  His dogs started barking in the background so I told him it was the police and he had to answer the door.  Get this...he said no so the police broke down his door....AGAIN and hauled him out of there...btw, the cops told me there were no cuts on his wrists, etc when they took the phone from him and reported their badge number for me to tell 911.

You will loooove this.  The cops took him into hospital and he maintained he never told me he was trying to kill himself and they let him go.  Thank God 911 had me keep them on the phone while talking to him.  They were telling me in one ear what to ask him and I was telling him I had a bad connection so I was repeating what he replied to make sure I had it right.  I could have been charged with mischief had that not been happening.  I think that is why 911 asked me to ask the cop that took the phone from the idiot to give me a badge number so there was no doubt what I was saying was real.

My friends are trying not to get caught in the middle, but frankly, this guy really worries me and there is nothing I can do.  I did put in a court order that he cannot phone me (and silly me accepted the call last night to try to get him to understand I have no interest in him)...but unless he harms me...I cannot stop him sending mail or showing up where I am.  I don't like to ask friends to take sides, but I really think they should take enough of a side with me to stop inviting him with us when I am going.  He has even admitted to them that he did do all those calls about suicide and they tell me to play nice!!!  AHHHHHHHHH.

Oh, by the way, he is married and his wife put him in a psychiatic institute (against his will...which is the important part since lots of people self admit and are fine socially) after he punched her out.  Of course, according to his side of the story, he never touched her...gee, why don't I believe him.

Sad part is, this guy makes my hubby look like an angel.  My hubby wants a piece of him.  I don't think I had better mention this latest violation to my hubby.  Hubby might be immature and unthoughtful...but at least he is sane.  (and I hate to call anyone anything bad when it comes to mental health, but I don't think the idiot is sane).

I know some of you are going to say to put the letters back in the mail unopened marked 'return to sender' which would have been smart, had I not opened them all to find out who they were from.

Thank you for putting up with my newest rant.  This guy is such a piece of work.

JD

BTW, Cadie, can I borrow your 6'4 stucture to take care of the guy for me?

JD

wow jd, stay clear of him if you can. maybe even send the letters back? sounds like he is crazy and dangerous, and at the very least just not the guy for you.
as for your birthday-happy birthday. please be safe and maybe hang out with other friends on your big day so this guy doesn't try to come around.

RTG, trust me, spending the day with my family...far away from this guy.  Also am calling my friends to tell them I am no longer 'playing nice'.  When we go out, it is him or me!!!

My day is getting better by the minute.  I wish I could talk about what has got me going now...but it is work related and so it is "top secret'  ::) although, oddly enough I am not supposed to know about it either.   Lets say that a sly move is being pulled that would pit me against ... well someone very close to me and because it is 'top secret' this person and I could have ended up in a room arguing against each other without knowing it until we got there since we would never have discussed it outside of work.  And we are not talking a friend here, this is a relative and the company knows it all to well.   I can't say anymore...just that I am not happy and don't think I can even tell my relative about it since...ya here is that phrase again ... top secret.  I love my job...this is the first time I have been put in this situation, but since the last name is famous...guess I should have realized they would use it to their advantage at some point, even though I am not the one that has/had the ability to make the name famous in this field.

Tears...sorry, off subject, I just watched someone play the harp on TV.  So romantic and wonderful...Thinking of you K.  To be able to produce something that sounds so wonderful...I am just a cold scientist...based in fact, black and white and no artistic ability at all.

Ok, I have rambled enough for one day.  Oh well, I guess tomorrow is the start of a new year for me...hope it gets better than it has been this year!!!  More to the point, I hope it is not worse!!!!

Nothing like a man who just can't let go, eh?  :P  :P  :P  Why oh why don't they ever take NO for an answer? Pathetic...

Anyway, you need to steer clear of this guy. Don't answer his calls, whatever the circumstances. If your friends invite you out, find out if he is going along first. If so, do not go along. Explain to your friends that you'll have nothing whatever to do with this person for your own safety.

If you remove yourself from the situation long enough, eventually he will get bored and move onto another victim. But continuing to take his calls and socialize with him not only encourages his behaviour but also puts you at risk. Just don't do it, hon. Guys can be absolute nutcases and we don't want to see you get hurt.

If he continues stalking you, you might consider filing a restraining order. BUT be advised that if you do so and then agree to see him or willingly place yourself in an area where you know that he will be, you will be in just as much legal trouble as him.

Don't feel like you're all alone in this either. I think that just about every woman has an unwelcome suitor that won't leave her alone. The trick is all in how you handle it. If you really want him to go away, remove yourself entirely from the situation. Don't see him, don't talk to him, don't have anything to do with him, period. As for the cards, that's just pathetic. Feed them to your shredder...and maybe take a self defense class.

LOL, thanks Angel.

I have tried for a restraining order...cannot have unless he harms me first.  I phoned my friends tonight and say I will not socialize with them if he is here.  I am thinking of changing my phone number.  It would be a pain in the ...back end...to do an unlisted number but better than deleting 20 messages a day from him.

As for self defense, I have that covered.  I have a black belt in karate and in Tai Kwon Do.  I have not practiced for years and would not want to meet a REALLY bad guy, but I can still handle him.

As for nutcases, I have had my share.  You would think I was a cute model or something instead of a 5'2 nothing.  Last year the police arrested a guy who tried to assualt me when I was out running.  I mean he got out of his car and tried to ... hump me...thank God my hubby set me up with pepper spray.  Funny thing was, I warned all the women that run in my area and he happened to hit on a female OPP officer (who lives 2 doors down from me) next who used my testimony to seal the case.  I don't have to worry about him for another year or so.

Here is another one for you.  When I first moved here, it was/is a small country neighbourhood where everyone was new and so someone did a little BBQ for meeting the neigbours.  This one guy kept hitting on me and so I said "I am not into STD so go away".  He showed up at my house the next Sat.  You will laugh but I swear this is true.  He parked at the end of my 60' driveway, got out of his car and ran up the driveway with a string of condoms in his hand yelling "NO STD, it is good, I am ready for you".  My neighbours across the street heard this and started to run over while I just walked into the back yard, where I had the OPP officer and her hubby over for drinks.  I was just putting my dogs out front when he showed up.  That ended really quickly.

It is soooo good to hear that I do not have 'sucker' or something on my forehead and that other women who are not models (which as I said I am certainly not) have these problems.

You know, there are a lot of good men out there...why can't I find one?  Sometimes I am glad I have gotten tooo fat for men to really look at me...too bad my self esteem can't take it and I will be working hard to get healthy again.

JD

JD, I'm sorry to say that I've been stalked and had it escalate to the point of a succesful restraining order.

Write down when and where he shows up, and what he says to you if you can.  In the future, if he harms you this will be a great help.

I'm sorry you're going through this.  It really sucks.  Luckily you have caller ID-DO NOT TAKE ANY MORE OF HIS CALLS!

You might want to compose a cease and desist letter(keep a copy for yourself), and then be sure to document all the crap he pulls 'cause he's obviously a control freak.

You deserve to be happy and healthy.  It is not your fault these nuts have come after you.

Stay safe!  Oh yeah, Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!

Thanx Sakina, I am changing my number to an unlisted number tomorrow at 8 am sharp when I can call in to get it. I have already told my family so they will not freak if they try to call before I go to my family b-day party and they cannot get through.  They all know they will get a number at the party, and if they are worried, from my folks before that.

As for the mail, I have been told to send back all the card (even though I could not have done return to sender because there was no return address) using the reverse call to get the address and register the envelope saying I wish no further contact.

The game stops right here.  Gawd...do women do this to men as much as men do it to us?  Like I said, I know there are great men out there...where is mine???


Thanx for the b-day wishes.

JD

JD, I'm sorry to say that I've been stalked and had it escalate to the point of a succesful restraining order.


Sakina, I just realized what you wrote...I said I could not get an order unless he hurt me first....I hope you were not hurt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :o >:( :'(

JD

I know that in at least some, i think most, places here in the US, all you have to do is prove threatening/stalking behavior to get a restraining order, but I also hope you weren't hurt, Sakina.

This guy sounds like a real piece of work. Frankly, I agree that you should flat out tell your friends, "do not bother to invite me if he will be there. If he is there when I arrive, I will turn around and leave. If he arrives when I am with you... I will turn around and leave." Any friends who refuse to accept your wishes in this matter do not seem to have your safety and best interest at heart.

I pray all goes well for you, and that this... being* goes away and leaves you alone.

*human, man, person, etc. being far to ... nice for this creature which has obviously given up his right to be considered of our species

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/i/partysmiley.gif

Happy Birthday Joeydog!

  Yes, that guy sounds like a real nut!  You had better be careful of him for sure!  Even though he has lots of money, he has even more problems!  Be careful!

Blondestorm

Happy Birthday,Jd!!!  Enjoy to your hearts content!!

Thanx everyone.  Going over to the parent's place soon.  Just relaxing over coffee an marvelling out have fast time goes when you aren't in a rush to get going!!

JD

Happy Birthday!

Happy birthday, JD!  :D

Thank you everyone.  I had a good day at the folks and a really yummy dinner.  Hope you all had a good day.

JD

Hey Everyone,

Yesterday was a nice day.  I enjoyed myself, and having changed my phone number, was left alone by the idiot.

My hubby is not being so nice to me today though.  You may recall I had told him to get his stuff out of the house today.  He was supposed to come at noon.  He woke me up at 6 this morning to tell me his was on his way.  I thought that was really swell of him since I had said I wanted to sleep in today, sit in PJ's and drink coffee until noon and then take care of the last few things I have to do before returning to work and 16 hours days out tomorrow.

When I told hubby I was annoyed and that he was supposed to come at noon, he said he was angry that I was treating him like that and he would come another day.  This is the 3rd weekend in a row he hasn't shown up.  Anyway, I was so annoyed I could not get back to sleep so I put his stuff on the driveway and called him suggesting he gets it before it rains since it is not rain resistant.  He emailed to tell me he would not be here and that if his stuff gets wet he will sue me.  Good God, the man has not lived here since October, when is he going to let go????  Anyway, his stuff is still on the driveway...he cannot sue me...I have emails indicating I have had his belongs ready to go and pls get them for the last 3 months.  I had checked this with a lawyer before...if he is not paying storage fees, as long as I give him ample opportunity to pick up his stuff, he has no come back.  I think me being home 6 days a week for 3 months and telling him over and over to come and get it (on email  no less so I have the documentation) is considered reasonable.

I am returning to work tomorrow...although only 3 days a week.  I am nervous I must say...but I am hoping that by the end of the week I will be in a better head space.  I love work and want to get back...it is just going to be that beginning time that is tough...lol, it is not like I am going to a strange place ...I have been there 5 years.

I am trying to work out a regiment for my hair once I get back to work...Ugh...I am clueless.  See, I live in the country and I work in the city.  I have found that I need a toner to really get the dirt off my skin when I work in the city but when I am home on weekends (or the past 8 months) I get no dirt off using it.  The cotton ball is clean (unless I have been chain sawing, dry walling garages, gardening).   My hair is 4 inches longer than when I worked last and I didn't take very good care of it then either (thought I did but you have taught me I did not really).  Guess I will play it out this week and see what I can come up with.  I have some ideas...but I will let you know how it goes at it goes.

Again, thank you all for your b-day wishes.  You are all very kind.  Take care and talk to you tomorrow night (maybe if I am alive still) or on Tuesday.

JD

I forgot how much work it is to set up lunches, snacks, meds, gym clothes, travel mugs for coffee, thermos for coffee, etc for work could be...The day is over half gone and I have only just finished...although

I went to my health food store to buy some things for my hair, including the ingredients for the recipe, thanx Curly 64, GREAT

http://www.longlocks.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?num=1180916663/0

Anyway, when I had to ask for help to find the aloe, the clerk stood next to me as I took a quick look at the ingredients...and as we stood there she said to me "What do you use for your hair...it is sooo shiny.".  I had to laugh as I told her that was what the aloe and other little goodies in my cart were for.  I told her about LL and she is going to be checking it.  

As you all know, my hair is not all that long...but obviously what I am learning here is doing me some good.  Thanx to you all.

Now I have to do some ironing...ugh.  I really hope I can sleep tonight.

JD

Glad to hear that you had a good b-day, JD.  :)

And LOL @ you leaving your husband's stuff out in the driveway. hahaha You go, girl.
I actually did a similar thing with my last bf about a year ago. Some guys just deserve it!

Well, first day back at work.  As I suspected, I did not sleep much last night, and my cat climbing on the counter and turning on the blender at 2 am did not help!!!  God love them...

Work was fine.  I was honored when I got there and found my office decorated both for my welcome back and my B-day and cards for each, both signed by all my co-workers.

By 1 today, my trainees from months ago were back in my office asking questions...which instilled a lot of confidence in me since I could still answer them all.  And when I had to explain something (work related) in great detail to my boss, I was thrilled!!!  I still know my stuff!!!

The morning routine went much better than I expected since the animals seemed to understand they had to get moving.  On top of that, I even did my usual routine of cleaning my kitchen (Monday night job) once I got home from work.

My friends at work wanted to know if I was running today.  I had decided to start next week to give myself a break, and that is what I told them.  I did tell them I had brought running shoes for a lunch time walk though.  At noon sharp, 4 of my female friends showed up to walk with me and said they would each of the 3 days I am in a week.  Now I think I might start running the 4 days I am off and walk with them the other days.  I HAVE to lose this weight.

I keep meaning to try my belly dancing tape.  I haven't... ::).  I think I am motivated enough now to do it tomorrow.  Heck, I ran up the stair (5 floors each time x 7 times) today, ate right, walked...this is diet material!!!!

Hair - OMG...the worst day I have had in weeks.   Even though it was not hot I guess the humidity was up.  I had frizzy hair huge!!!  Just awful!!!

When I got home tonight I had gotten (in the mail) my Curly Girl Handbook as Indigo had said I would PLUS I got my new silk pillow slips!!!  Cool.  I have looked at the book quickly and one thing I live is that there are no models (well, ok a couple of movie stars to help you learn what type of curly hair you have) but rather normal, average people.  I see me sitting here tonight reading it.  Excited about that....DARN, forgot to get popcorn to sit and relax with.  Guess I have to make a real dinner after all.

I am happy.  I loved being at work today.  I hope I can get back full time soon.

JD

Angel, I was typing my journal when you posted...was not ignoring you.  Well, it was cool and I could have thrown his stuff in the garbage at the end of the day (as today was garbage day)...but I decided to be bigger than that and I dropped it outside his (well his mothers-remember he lives there and is 48) place on my way home from work tonight.  Either way...I have no more ties and I think I took the higher road even though it was annoying after my first day of work and he did not deserve it.

JD

hehehe It's cool, JD


Quote:

I could have thrown his stuff in the garbage at the end of the day (as today was garbage day)...

lmao I've done that before too.  :-X  Different ex though. Granted, I ended up fishing it all back out of the trash and washing it, but nevermind that. Why must guys be such jerks that it drives us to trash their stuff? Literally... lol
   Oh well. Good for you getting the irresponsible mama's boy out of your life and moving on.

Glad to hear that you enjoyed your first day back at work. I know that even better things are ahead for you.  :)

:-[  Thnx Angel...I appreciate your encouragement.

Life will be good...and I am on the right track.

JD

I had a very quiet day today.  I could not sleep last night until after 2 and having been on the go since 3:30 am yesterday morning, I ended up sleeping in today.

I sat quietly reading until about 2 this afternoon at which point I cleaned my living room and dining room, got my things together for tomorrow (work), went for a run (if you can call it that), had a shower and then make dinner.  Here I am now.

My hair is not behaving.  It is frizzy again.  I dunno what is going on.  Grr.  I dunno what to do.  I guess I will have to think about that for tomorrow night when I can do any kind of conditioning I can think of and then wash it out on Thursday when I am not at work.  Any suggestions?

I watched the belly dancing video today (I like to watch something once before I do it).  I can't imagine my body ever moving like that but it sure wont unless I try to learn.  It is longer than I expected.  I am trying to figure out how I will fit in an hour of that and an hour of weights in one day.  I mean, the day is only so long and I think that both should be done the same day so that the muscles get a day to rest inbetween.  Lets not forget too, that I want to get back to running so I can run a marathon next summer.  That will take up at least an hour each of the days I do weights plus one.  I do have a job too!!!!  Sigh.  But I can't help feeling that I would be in such great shape if I could do it all, plus the belly dancing will strengthen my core which is good for running.  Help you keep your chest lifted so you get lots of air in the lungs. Not to mention that little issue of 40 lbs that I have to lose.  It is so bad (my weight) that it causes me stress all the time, even in my dreams.  That can't be healthy and the weight sure isn't.

Oh well, I guess I will have to work it out.

JD

I do the same thing when I get a new video too.  I first I thought, god --- I can't do that!  But you learn.  I know its hard fitting these things into your day.  One idea is to just do say 10 to 15 mins of the video. You can take a move and practice it alone for that time.  This can leave room for the other excerises. http://smilies.sofrayt.com/aiw/kiss.gif.  Holy crow!  Your doing a marathon?  Cool!!  Oh I wanted to ask, which Belly Twins DVD do you have?  

I have the DVD "Belly Twins Bellydance Core Conditioning".  It looked like a good place to start.  You do know it is all your fault I am starting this!!!  ;D

I would like to run a marathon.  Hell, all the people I taught to run the 5k last year have run a half marathon or marathon since then.  Now here I am trying to get back to the 5k.    Notice the ticker below...I have a long way to go to get back to it.  

Actually, if I train straight though it will take 52 weeks to train (10 weeks for each the 5 and 10 k, then 16 weeks for the half marathon and the marathon.  That is okay though.  By then I should have peeled of this disgusting fat and be in time for the cancer run in September.  The hard part about the training is when freezing rain comes down or the temp is 30 (celcius) below in the winter.  I do have a treadmill which catches a lot of dust that I can use though.  I just hate it though.  I get so bored on it.  The treadmill makes enough noise that one cannot hear the TV though so thats out.   Truth be know, I would just be happy if I could do a half marathon.

I have been thinking about how to fit all the exercising in.  For now, while I am only working 3 days a week, I can do the weights and DVD on my days off.   What I will do when I get back to full time I don't know.  I guess I will take that as it comes.

Anyway, the battle of the bulge is on.  Today I will use the stairs all day (5 floors up and down each time I want a smoke and when I arrive and leave) and then I will take a walk at lunch.  Tomorrow is running day...and all the rest I guess.  It is a lot easier to watch what I eat on work days since I take my own food (no caf for me) and that controls my choices and amounts.

Hair is a bit less frizzy this morning.  I used a bit of jojoba oil last night to try to get it under control.  I might be using the AG tonight.  We will see.

Well, better finish getting ready for work.  Need to drink my smoothie and today it will empty the blender so I will have to clean that, which is always a chore after smoothies.

JD writes too much and people find it too much to read.

Ok, work was good, day was good.  Good old routine is coming back.  Used stairs and walked 3 k at lunch.  Ate well.

Hair...HELP

hair still frizzy.  want to know what I should do tonight as I can wash it all out tomorrow since I am not working...talk to me folks.  I have lots of goodies here.  

When I know that I'll be washing all of my hair the next morning, I usually just do a heavy EVOO under a sleep cap the previous night. What will absorb absorbs during the night and the rest washes out easily.
That's just me, though.

Thanx Angel, I have been thinking that.  I have some infused with sage and rosemary.  Going to do that now and go to bed.  Tomorrow I will wash it out, do an ACV and then a aloe scalp massage.   I just wasn't sure if that was the right move, but now that you have said it...going for it.

JD

PS(Kitty says..."why did you say that now...i just got comfy on my mom's lap)

Aww poor kitty. hehe

Sounds like a plan, JD. Have a good night.  :)

jd, yeah for getting back in the routine of work and working out regularly! sounds like angel's evoo suggestion is a good one. btw, did you infuse the rosemary and sage into the evoo yourself?!?  :o or can you buy it like that? if so i'm impressed, and if the latter, where can i get some? hee hee.

Well, today was not the day I expected at all.  I did NOTHING.  Hard to do much when you can't stand up. My arthritis kicked in badly today with the rain and all.  I just started suffering this in the last year.  It sucks!!!  But it is all the more reason why I must lose the weight to take the stress off the joints.  Anyway, that will mean a busy day tomorrow getting the groceries done and meds picked up after work.  Hopefully on Sat I will get in my run, belly dancing and weights.

RTG, I make my own infused EVOO.  I buy my sage and rosemary in bulk at the health food store.  Then I mix 1/2 cup sage, 1/2 cup rosemary and 1 cup EVOO, let it stand over night, sieve off the oil and put it in a dark container (or you can just wrap the container with tin foil) and use as needed.  Chamomile has been suggested to me too...but I can't find any, unless I buy the tea and take it out of the bags...which would be expensive.

My hair is just drying right now...so I can't say how it is doing.  EVOO can't have hurt though.  If it dries badly, I will use my AG Deep tonight and just rinse it out before I go to work tomorrow.

Ok!!!  I have started a poll and a challenge.  See

http://www.longlocks.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?num=1184878889

to learn about it.

Today sucked when I was out of work, fine in work and now  better within the last couple of hours.  Won't bore you.  All that I need to say on a personal note was work went well for my fist part time week back.  Going to ask the hospital if I can go back for more hours when I see my doc on Weds.

Hair:  Angel, your suggestion worked well with the EVOO.  Thank you.

I am not going to wash my hair until Sunday now.  I did not wash it today so that will be 3 days...I am going to test scalp remedies that do not require a wash....just a rinse.  See above link.  I will oil hair with coconut tonight (I did jojoba last night...I like cocount and cocoa but need to wash after since I have not found the right amount...but on a work day...cannot wash in the am as I am up and out of here by 5:30 am-with a 1 hour dirve to work).

Pls look at my link and vote or comment.  I believe it is a good subject...and...well see link.

JD

Well, I am feeling flat this week.  I am tired and not interested in much.  I haven't even been reading all your journals.  It just seems like too much effort.  

My hair is driving me nuts.  It is so frizzy.  I don't know what to do for it.  I am wondering if it is the shampoo.  I am using a sample from Ida of Chagrin and the more I think about it, the more I think my hair started getting frizzy when I started using it.  So, when I next wash my hair I will go back to my mud and clay shampoo from Ida.  

Oh, my hubby came by today.  He has the part I need to download pics from my camera onto the computer.  He is bringing it to me on the weekend (if he remembers...if his head wasn't attached he'd forget that when he went out).  At that time I should be able to get a pic of my hair on here.  Hopefully it wont be frizzy when I take the pic.  

JD

So tired.  Still no energy to read journals..sorry.  They are important to me...but so is sleep.  Got up at 4 am this morning to get to work in time...got home at 9 pm.  Thank God for the folks putting out the dogs!!

Got a great compliment on my hair from my top boss today.  She told me it looked 'so much longer and fantastic'.  Thank you all at LL.
Without you, my hair would look...blah, even if it is relatively short.

Was going to do an EVOO infused with rosemary and sage tonight but I went and had a body shower (was very hot and sweaty) and forgot my shower cap was directly in the line of the water!!!  Oh well, it is drying now and I am going to do a Curly64 treatement tomorrow since I took it out of the freezer tonight.

Miss you all, just been so tired going back to work...and I wont do it from work because that is not what they pay me to do!!!!

Hey, Roomtogrow, you doing ok?  Haven't heard from you in so long!!

JD

JD, I hope your energy level picks up soon.  Maybe it's simply a case of your body trying to readjust to working again.  'Least I hope it's as simple as that.  *hugs*  Feel better soon.   :)

Trisha, thank you for your encouragement.  Hopefully my energy will pick up soon as I adjust to working again.  At least my phobia about work is gone and I enjoy my time there.  I do love my job.  I am going to go to MEC (Mountain Equipment Company) tomorrow and buy some running clothes that fit me.  The ones from 40 lbs ago are no good to me right now.  Next summer they should be fine...I hope!!!  Losing weight is so hard.


Yesterday was a really long day.  I left here at 5:30 am and got home at 8 pm.  I feel drained today... but that is not a surprise.  I got up this morning and did groceries, filled the car with gas, went to the pet store and went for my electrolysis.  I am trying to psych up to cutting my lawn, cleaning up the basement a bit and getting ready for work tomorrow.  I have a busy day on Sat and want to rest on Sun so I want to get as many chores done as possible today.  I just have no energy to do them!!!

As for hair, well, I haven't done anything with it yet.  Once I have cut the lawn I will put one of Curly 64's recipes on my hair to deep condition and then I will wash...but this time with my mud and clay soap which I remembered to take out of the freezer about an hour ago.  I just put jojoba oil along the length of my hair and on the ends last night.  Ah, heck I might as well throw in an ACV rinse today too.  Why not.  Hopefully all of that will help with the frizzies.

Oh ya, yesterday I ran into a colleague I had not seen since I went back.  After welcoming me back the first thing she said was about how long my hair had gotten and how pretty it is.  Gotta love that.  

Well, better do what I came on the computer to do.  TTYL.

JD

Wow, JD. I know I've probably said it before, but I'm amazed at how much you get accomplished every day. If I had a "to do" list that long, I'd probably accomplish half of it in a day...but you do it all and I find that sooo respectable. You're unstoppable, chica.

Just be careful not to try and take on too much. It's no surprise with as much as you get done that you run out of energy at some point. It's ok to pace yourself. I just thought I'd mention how impressed I am with your level of ambition.  :)  I hope that you attract a driven guy who is as much a mover and shaker as you are and who makes you really happy.

:-[  Thank you for the compliment Angel.  And thank you for the best wishes about a guy.  You are so sweet.


I got everything done today.  Tomorrow is work, MEC at lunch (oh ya, I seem to have lost a couple of pounds since I went to work  ;D), a full house vacuum and I need to do a bit of cooking too.  I am making spinach and cottage cheese stuffed crepes to freeze.  Mmmm.

Saturday I am taking my generator in for a long over due tune up and doing a tonne of little jobs around the house.  My next project is to put up crown molding (I bought it before I got sick) in the spare bedroom.  I am planning that for next weekend.  Should be interesting.  And I plan on painting all the trim in the kitchen, hall, living room and dining room that weekend.  I have already painted those rooms...just never got to the white trim.

As for the hair...it is almost dry after doing the Curly mix, the ACV, the scalp massage with aloe, the poo with my good old mud and clay shampoo and then a quick condition.  Hair is not frizzy!!!  Yahoo.  It was the poo that was the problem. Phew, so glad I figured that problem out.  

Better run.  Still have the dinner dishes to do before bed.  Have a great night all.

JD

Just reading your to do list exhausted me, I couldn't imagine actually doing all of that in a day.  I'm such a slacker. :P

LOL, my docs tell me I do to much too when I am well.  LOL, it is part of my disease.  ...ok, you all deserve to know...I suffer badly from depression.  Now, many people suffer depression at some point in their lives...but I have a literal chemical disorder (which is a relatively small part of the population) and hit a depression every 6 months.  You can set your watch by it.  Winter.  Yes, for those of you who know about it, I have SAD, but I also have a 'predisposed susceptibility to depression".  In 2000 I was put on disability for life.  I could not accept that and went back to work in 2003 in a good, and well paying job (not to be confuse with rich).  I hit a big blip in the last year, when I had a change of doctors who changed ALL 8 of my meds in one night.  I crashed.  Fired him!!!!  But a little too late and ended up on this funk for 8 months.  

This doc, well he was set up to be one of the best surgeons in Canada until he was in a car accident and he was burned alive.  One hand is a hook, one hand is a stub, he has half a face, a wig  and God knows what the rest of him is like (clothes, can't tell and don't want to !!)  He says he has never felt depression.  How can you go through that and not feel depression.  Hell, grieving a perons you love is a form of depression, much less your own life...  Anyway, when I self admitted myself to hospital for the six weeks needed to recover at all, I found out that every patient there that had ever had him had sued (sp) him.  Nice guy, huh.  Why he can still practice I don't know...but I know that there are shrinks out there trying to get him out of the profession!!!  Thank God.

Docs can be great and they can be bad.  Let me tell you a story about a woman I knew that had a C-section in the days where they knocked you right under.  In those days they used a catyleptic (sp?) which means that is the first part of anesthesia.  We use it on animals too.  It stops you being able to move but you can hear and feel everything.  It was used to relax you in the old days.  The anesthesiologist did not administer the anesthetic to her!!!  She felt the whole C-section and could not move despite the pain!!!  She sued them and won because...and you will love this...she was able to repeat all of the conversations they had while she was being cut and stuff...including the docs latest golf game!!!

Then there are the great dosc, like my GP who has even given me her home phone number in case I am really in trouble.

Ok, so I am recovering from a crappy doc.  BTW, my old doc of 20 years (for depression) retired which is why I got this prick (excuse my language).  Oh man did he screw me up (the new one).

For the many of you that do not understand this disease...think how past partum depression felt, or the loss of your husband/wife or a child feels.  I suffer that feeling 6 months of the year every year.  The best I can say is it is like a cancer of the soul.  It actually physically hurts...and if you look at a cigarette pack in Canada, it is the second biggest killer of all diseases (suicide).  Cancer is the only one that beats it.

I am lucky.  I came from a strong family who supported me and taught me to be strong.  I have put myself in hospital 4 times (from 6-8 weeks each time).  For each of those times, I have gone to at least 15 funerals for the people I met there and got to know.  I have suffered this disease for 25 years.  I have learned that I will never quit because I have learned when the disease tells me there is no hope...there always is some I cannot see.  I have learned to have faith in that.

There are people out there who milk the system.  I chose not to.  There are people out there who feel so sorry for themselves that they are worthless to anyone.  I WILL NOT be one of them.  I fight this disease 6 months of the year...but I have only had to stop my life 4 times in 25 years and I always come back.


Something else you should all know.  Think of the person who is grieving the loss of a child or a spouse.  You know how they lose weight and look terrible for a while.  That is because the saying that a healthy mind is the key to a healthy body.  It is very true.  This illness doesn't only make the world so dark to a person who has it (like a horse with the fly mask on, even in bright sunlight-meaning when I am sick, it actually seems like a dark stormy day everyday even if the sun is brilliant) but it starts to make real and psycological (sp) physical problems.  For example, I believe the headaches were in my head and did at the time.  I also believed that my thoughts that I had multiple unirary tract infections was in my head until I ended up in hospital for a week with a septic kidney infection!!!

It is not a small disease...and sadly, so many people like the killer in Virginia and the people who milk the system make people like me (which, BTW is the majority, deal with it).  I deal with it.  RTG, this is a rant!!!.  Hope you all still want to talk to me, knowing I am 'crazy'

JD

You have my sympathy, JD.  My family has a tendency toward depression, although not nearly to this degree.  Perhaps the tendency is in part mitigated by living in the south.  Hmmm.  I'm trying to think if I did better living in Saudi Arabia.  

I don't think I could tell, since living there was so VERY high stress.  Locked on a compound, unable to leave the country or the city, unable to rent or buy a car, able to socialize with only about 50 more people, only one restaurant, no movie theater, church fellowship of less than 20 people, the people I worked with were the same I lived with who were the same I socialized with...After living in the 5th largest city in America...Nah, I don't think I could tell if the quantity of sunlight made a difference.  

I think my worst bout of depression was when I was pregnant.  I started having contractions that my doctor ASSURED ME were not labor.  It was my second baby, and it sure as heck FELT like labor.  They would start about an hour and a half after I went to bed, last the next four or five hours, then stop about an hour and a half before I had to get up.  I had a four year old, so not getting up and functioning wasn't an option.  This went on for five weeks.  

If you had taken a man, and for over a month given him 3 hours of sleep a night and subjected him to wracking pain for the other five, you would have called it what it was.  TORTURE!   >:(  Instead of "the discomfort of late pregnancy."   ::)

The worst part was having to choose to live every day.  Walking up or down a flight of stairs and choosing not to throw myself down them.  Slicing a tomato and choosing not to use the knife on myself.  Driving my car and choosing not to drive it off a bridge, into a wall, or whatever happened to occur to me and be available.  It was exhausting.  I cannot imagine it doing six months out of every year.  You have my admiration as well.  

Thanks for being brave and sharing your challenges with us.

When I lived in Michigan (for 15 years) I was misserable.  I could hardly get out of bed and was really unhappy.  Michigan is lucky to get 30 days of sun a year.  Now I live in Arizona and am mostly better.  I have Cushing's Syndrome from taking Prednosone in 1999.  I have atypical depression from the Cushing's in addition to weight gain.

I am not on meds 'cause I know my depression is not a true chemical imbalance and I am getting better with exercise, psychotherapy and adrenal tablets.  Oh, and stubborness.

What bugs me most is the lack of joy in activities I have always enjoyed.  However, it is getting better and I don't give in either, but I do take care of myself, too.

Sounds to me like your strength of spirit has seen you through and will continue to do so.  

Brava!

I understand as I too have depression.  It runs in my family :-[.  I have been medcated and seeing a shrink for over 10 years now.  Some meds I would never recommend as they make you worst.  What I'm on now is far better then years ago.  Still I do have minor panic attacks from time to time.  I think the saddest part is when people treat me like I'm a looney.  My one SIL treats me like that. :-/  When it came to doctors, well, my GP almost killed me with the pills he gave me.  I told him I need a shink dammit! You don't know what your doing!  I got the shirnk and thinks got better.  It took a long while to find the pills that worked for me.  Some were horriable and I hope I never have to go through that agony again.  Prayer, Love and Determination keep me going. :)

Lisabelle, Tex and Sakina, thank you sooo much.  I was afraid to see what the responses were to my admission.  You all validated and understood my disease.  I am grateful.

I would love to tell you all more about it...as I believe if there is one thing I can do that is good because of this disease, is spread the word that it is not uncommon to suffer it at least once in you life (in fact, 1/5 Canadians suffer it in their life time once or more).  And I, suffering from it so badly, can offer some kind words and support and do know a bit about the meds...both from taking them and from the job I do.

FYI, for you people who might wonder if I can function and be normal with it...I own my house (no parents involved....although I have great folks), I work a great job and make decent money, all my plants live and my animals (all over 14) are healthy and happy.  And yes, I have many good friends...and yes...they are all what you would call sane!!!

As for hair...got a pic taken today and the owner of the camera is supposed to send me it.  I will post when I get it.  Remember, only 21 inches!!!  Just going to oil with coconut oil tonight...hair seems to like it...but have to wash after using it.  I guess I have not figured out the right amount yet.

Lisabelle, I am going to get the hairpins and will post a pic with the snood once I have done that.  Want to get your opinion.

JD

*hugs JD* You inspire me. I've been dealing with depression for roughly 7 years, some months are better than other... but winter seems to be worse for me too. I've been put on meds for it twice, but the first time it didn't help, and the second... made it worse. I still have the scars from that one, actually, mental and physical. After that I figured out I'd have to work it out on my own. I've been miserable these past few days with my semi-self inflicted voice rest... but I will survive this as all other challenges.

By the way, I got the DEEP yesterday, and I'm going to try it tomorrow(wash day)... I'll let you know how it comes out!
ooh, pic! *wants to see!*

as promised:

http://i207.photobucket.com/albums/bb272/joeydog_1992/100_1002.jpg

Wooooooo JD! What great waves and curls you have! Are they natural?
Reminds me of Vannah White!  :)

Oh Wow!  Love the colour and the waves! :)

oh wow, JD. you have LOVELY hair! very very pretty color, and I love the waves.

I wish I could see your beautiful picture!  My computer will not let me see it.  Gotta find another PC.  I am sure your hair is very beautiful!!!!!

Jim

Thank you all for the compliments.  The color is fake (but as close to the pregray color as possible) but the rest is natural.

JD

great pic!!  thanks for sharing! :)

pretty waves jd

Thanx Curly and RTG.  RTG, I was getting worried about you...had not heard from you so long.

Today sucked and was good.  50/50 I guess.  Work did a HUGE screw up.  Umm, how can I put this in short...Well someone who has only been with us a year did some basic work based on the high level work I was to do.  To put it short...she totally screwed up...BUT WAS NOT HER FAULT since she was not trained to do it.  It is going to take an evaluation I should have 2 years to do...and yes...our evaluations do take that long...to 3 months.  No way I can do it.  Will have to talk to boss on Weds when I am back at work.  Two problems...a junior evaluater should never had looked at this...to much for them...and second, my work is forcing us to do a 2 year evaluation in 9 months which is impossible...even for the level of my Dad who was #3 in the world...much less me.  I don't have the 35 years of experience, etc...

Anyway, this poor junior evaluator...I had to tell her what she did wrong (nicely might I add) so she would learn.  (I am going to bring it up at the next staff meeting so this does not happen...a senior evaluator needs to check the work of a junior, which obviously did not happen in this case). She felt so bad she was in tears.  I told her I could fix it and all was well and that it was not her fault and I could fix it.  I even put my arm around her to console her.  Still she is devastated.  Poor  girl.  Short staffing did this to her (and me) but WAS NOT HER FAULT.

On the flip side...while all I said to her was true...it is going to make my job murder!!  Yes, I know you are all anti-smoking...but I had to go out and have a smoke and bang my head on the picnic table...better that than hurt her...she REALLY did nothing wrong based on her training.  Regardless, without the data I need I have to do a 2 year review in less than 3 months when I should have 24 months.  So much for part-time...I will be working at least 80 hours a week overtime.  Still, as I said, not her fault..and I did not tell her what it would do to me.  She is feeling bad enough.  I am mad at the other senior evaluators for not seeing it.  They had lots of time to assess her and figure it out...and the mistake was SOOOO understandable...but it would take me too long to explain..so just take my word.  Poor girl.  She felt so bad she was in tears...but I blame the system...not her.  And I spent time explaining that to her and making sure she went home not feeling bad.  And she felt sooo bad, that took a couple of hours...but I still think she will not sleep and will feel bad about her understandable mistake....damn, I hate that!!!!  MAD this poor girl is going to be upset tonight when it was NOT HER FAULT!!!

As for me, I told my boss that a mistake that should have been caught  was missed because the 2/3 (am the 3rd evaluator who was not there) missed it and so the submission would be late.  Failure of the senior evaluators to deal with it...which is why we make more than the 'junior' (I put that in quotes because we are either senior evaluator or evalutors...we could not politically correctly call someone a 'junior evaluator"...although that is what I called myself when I was one) caused this mistake.  It seems that at my work, the title just means more money, not the responibility of training the new ones...GAWD!!  If the seniors will not train the new...how do the new learn...Don't get me going here.  Let me put it this way...of the 3 'senior evaluators' I am the newest to the ranks.  The oldest (who really has the wealth of knowledge since he has been there for 20 years) says it is not in his job description to do training!!!  Isn't that a given ...since in my line of work there are no "trainers".  The ones with the knowledge, teach.  

Argh.  So then the second highest evaluator just tells people to do what they think.  Gawd, this is not a moral evaluation, this is supposed to be scientifically based (now do not panick...the SH (section head...or boss) picks up the wrong thought or decisions so the public is safe!!... but that is not her job...that is what the SENIOR evaluators are SUPPOSED to do alone and TEACH the newbies!!!).  But this particular senior evaluator figures it is up to the SH to figure out ALL the errors.  Hell, ya, we have a higher up to pick out what we miss...but the goal is not to miss anything!!!.  And just so you all feel safe...after the SH we go through 2 more commitees to make sure we are safe (each committee comprising of 20 -50 people!!).  Believe me...an error on one parties part would be found.  As a senior evaluator I might miss things my Sh would see...but that senior evaluators depend on my SH to do it... PISSES ME OFF.  She has a whole lot more to do than fix what the senior evaluators missed...Oh I think I forgot to mention, that Senior Evaluators check 'junior" evaluators do before it goes to SH.  In fact, as a senior evaluator, even what I do goes to another senior evaluator before it goes to my SH.

Okay, there is my rant for the week.  People slacking off!!

As for hair...nothing much to tell.  I did my run today at lunch and got really hot and sweaty .  I just rinsed and did conditioner... and one thing I love about my work shower is I can take the shower head off and do that really cold rinse (as I can at home) because I cannot stand the cold rinse all over my body....brrrr.  Sorry so long today...

Oh what a day!!  Got up at 4 am to go to work.  My computer was on since I had done a 12 hour download last night (which did not work by the way  [smiley=angry.gif].  Suddenly I hear an email come in and learn at 4:30 this morning that I am a victim of identity fraud.  Thank God I have paid all these years for instant reports on SIN, HealthCard and credit card uses.  I was able to stop everything by 9:30 am and only lost about $100.  Is that cool or what (all things considered).

Anyway...a whole morning on and off the phone while at work and it comes together to me that my predator is my beloved ex.  Go figure.

So, being a nice person, I called him and suggested that he come clean, give it up and I would let him go if he agreed to stay out of my life for good.  He hung up on me and then sent me harassing emails at work.  I had work block his email address (and being in gov't) inform he would be charged if he tried to email again.  (oh ya, when I got home I 'blocked him" and then found it odd when I got home again (of course with all this I had to go to a baby shower until 10:30 tonight) I found nothing from LL (or anyone else) but emails from him.  Go figure, I blocked everyone BUT him.  Duh!!!  Blonde moment I guess.

Anyway, to back track to between work and the baby shower...I guess I am a bit of a softy because I decided to call him mom (who he lives with) to tell her she might want to rein (sp?) him in before I had the opportunity to put him in jail.  To put it short, she was quite rude to me and would not even let me speak past telling her who was calling.  

After I left for the shower she phoned my folks (btw, how is it that the parents are getting involved in a 49 and 39 year olds relationship?).  Anyway, it turned out that 5 minutes before I called she found out her 47 year old daughter has ovarian cancer...so maybe 2-5 years to live.  Ok, I can see why she was rude to me.  She knew me calling meant I was REALLY pissed at her son because I have only called her once before when he ran up my credit cards to $10 000 (in one month) and refused to pay it!!!  She paid it.  

I have little respect for this woman.  That is a whole different story.  Not for here and now.  I do feel for this woman though...because I DO respect her strength.  She had 5 miscarriages, a still born and a child that lived 2 weeks before she adopted the 3 she has now.  She lost her husband 12 years ago to brain cancer and Parkinsons disease and her...partner/lover  (2 years ago) to lung cancer.  She has lost enough!!!  To lose another child...gawd... She has suffered more than enough loss.

When she spoke with my folks they explained why I called...which was a whole different story from what my ex gave her when she pulled herself together and asked him why I called.  Apparently she broke down into tears... told them she cannot take supporting her 2 children that are over 45 anymore (has been doing that for about 5 years) along with the stresses that they bring when she is 76.  I get that.  She told my folks she would deal with my ex and be in touch with me within the week.  Fair enough.  I will wait.  Wanted this wrapped up within 48 hours...but clearly that is not practicle for the poor woman.  Oh, BTW, she told my folks she had had it with my ex and was coming down on him big.  I would like to believe it...we will see.

Now here is the thing.  I feel REALLY bad for her about her daughter.  I would like to send her a sympathy care about what is happening and apologize that my timing sucked.  Even if I don't really like the woman...I feel those things.  Would it be wrong to do it?  I mean, I genuinely (sp?) feel so sad for her about her daughter and bad that my timing sucked.  Do I have to like the woman to express that?

JD

Its your good heart showing that you have empathy for her in this difficult time.  No, you don't have to like her one bit to feel for her.  I say let her know, 'cause she's already surrounded by insensitive people who are her family.  Everyone needs to know someone cares.

Sakina, thank you.  I believe in my heart I should do the right thing...and you have confirmed my belief.  One does not have to agree with the actions or beliefs of a person to reckonize a strength (which she must have to have got through all of the things she has) and/or hardships that a person has.  I will do the card.

I write again because I did not tell you the good in my day.  I said I was at a baby shower last night.  The 'mother to be' has been a friend of mine for 8 years.  She is a woman that nobody could dislike in the least (unlike me).  She had 2 pregnancies...each of which ended up in miscarriage and her spending 3 weeks in hospital and almost dying.   So she has adopted a child from Africa.  She found out 4 weeks ago she had gotten a son and was to get him this coming weekend. Amazingly enough, I was at her house with her when she found out.  And oddly enough (she is also my massage therapist) I am her last appt for therapy on Friday and she leaves on Saturday.  I have a funny feeling she might be a bit hyper for my message (sarcasm intended).

So, I went to the shower (remember I am social phobic and borderline agoraphobic) feeling terrified.  I met this woman with BEAUTIFUL hair.  Now it is not truly Rapunzel length...but getting there and it is so healthy and nice.  Which is more, she is one of those staggering beauties (and I don't mean the fading cute...just extremely beautiful).  Well, with my low self esteem, I wanted as far from her as I could get!!  But,  her personalilty was even nicer than her looks.  

Anyway, she and I hit it off great!! AND we discovered we had talked on the phone (with her business) and hit it off 1 year ago!!  At the end of the night, having found many things in common, but important to this site, a love for long hair.  I refered her to LL and I think she will join us soon.  But, for my selfish interests...she thought my hair was great and when we were talking she said she usually had her hair up.  When I said I wanted to buns and stuff but was not sure my hair was long enough she told me it was plenty long enough and that she would teach me to do neat buns, braids, etc....I am soooo excited.  You see, I am a woman that could never learn from reading something...need to see it happen.  That is why I was GREAT at labs...not so good at exams...oh well.  I made it through school.  Thank God in science, labs are worth more than theory!!!  Well not quit, but enough to push me up to my grades because once I did a lab I got the theory too.

Anyway, I think she will teach me to do something with my little 21 inches, and if she does that I know she will do pics.......darn, ex took my camera and is being a #@%$.  see above journal.  Well, hopefully I will get it back and we can get pics up!!!

Ohh a lab on hair ...um...designs?  Well you get what I mean.

JD

JD, I think sending a card to your ex MIL would be a kind gesture and she would probably think the world of you for doing it.

hey jd i've been off the site for a few days. i really like your waves-it looks great and somehow is longer than i pictured. guess i need to read back a few pages in the journal to see what you guys are all talking about on topic of depression.
how's work going so far?

Hey, RTG!!!  I am glad you are back.  I hope you are doing okay.  So sorry for your loss.

Work is GREAT.  My phobias about being at work are gone.  I enjoy it just like I used to and I feel strong there...if you know what I mean.  Next week is my last week of 3 days a week and then I change to 4 days a week.  That will be a real challenge.  I am not nervous about the work, just about whether I can handle it ok.  I chose to do 4 days in a row instead of taking Weds off.  I think that will help me get ready for 5 in a row better.  And if I have trouble, I will simply switch which days I work so that I have Weds off and Friday on.  So far, work is great, the house is running well, the hubby is completely out of my life (he will be charged with harassment if he calls, emails or shows himself here again.  My life is truly starting over...and I am happy with that.

Now if I could just lose the extra 40 lbs of me!!!  Sadly it is way to hot to run right now.  It is more than 40 degrees out there this week, and since body temp it 38 point something, there is no way I can run and hope to regulate my body temperature, especially since I am so out of shape.  I have said I want to do at least a half marathon next year.  I am thinking about a sprint triathalon too.  Training to bike and run is not hard...it will be training for the swimming that is hard.  Still, a sprint marathon is not big.  It is just a 5 km run, a 0.5 km swim and a 20 km bike ride...and to be honest...I do not wish to win or anything...just to be able to do it in a reasonable amount of time.  I am usually very competetive (sp?) but right now, just being able to finish a half marathong and do the triathalon would make me happy!!!  OH, I say training for the swim would be hard because of finding the time to train.  It is not the swin itself.  With work, the house, 2 hours of driving a day, the cats, my again parents (not that they need a lot...but they need help with some things) and then needing to rest with my disease...time is short!!

I am hoping that once I get my behind going, people here will be my moral support coaches.  I have no doubt.  Everyone here is so supportive.  On that note, I am going to check the local pool fall events and see if I can get my fat ... behind into something that fits with my schedule!

Oh, and a friend of mine downloaded that program I spent 12 wasted hours trying to do today.  He put it on a disc and did it for me at work.  Isn't it great to have friends.  Now my computer is compatible with work which is great because (haveing an hour drive to work) my boss lets me work at home if the weather is bad (freezing rain, excessive snow).

JD

Don't you love it when thing finally start to come together?!

glad to hear you are getting in the swing of a work week again. good luck with the extra day-you can do it! and you'll find time for some excercise. is there anything you could do inside at your house while it's so hot? i have a yoga dvd and pilates dvd, and they get me moving when i don' have time for anything else.

http://braidedimage.com/

I've been hunting and finally found it!  On this website you can order dvds on how to braid your own hair.  I have both of them and find them very informative.

http://www.hairrific.com/bridalstylesmadesimple.htm

I also recommend this dvd.  Don't freak out 'cause it says bridal styles, its a really good dvd.  I finally "got it" on how to do a rope braid from this dvd.


Have fun learning to braid!  You're at a really good length to start!!

Wow, all kinds of fun things wehen I came on tonight.  I LOVE this site.

Curlygirl...yup..cool when things start working out.

RTG, Thans for your support about my work weeks.  Nice to know people are rooting me on.

Sakina, funnily enough I was coming on to talk to you.  Funny you responded to my journal at the same time.  

As you know, Sakina, I have to use a tar shampoo at times.  I took your suggestion tonight and coated the length of my hair with conditioner before I did the scalp with the horrible tar shampoo.  It worked beautifully.  Thnx for the idea!!  To go one step futher...you suggested the curly girl hand book for me.  I had to use the oily mix to deal with my psoraisis and so my length was greasy.  I did not want to use poo so I did the 50/50 mix of conditioner and lemon juice and it did the job great!!! Thanx for the ideas on both fronts.  My hair liked that much better than what I would have done!!!!

You, Sakina, also suggested a particular non-poo and stuff to me and I told you the shipping for a $27 product was $53 bucks.  OUCH!!!!  To follow that up, I contacted the company and asked them what was up with that and they told me it was more than certainly a mistake.  I have to tell them exactly what I want and they will contact me with the right price.  Hopefully the shipping will be ok and I can try the trial kit you suggested.  Hope I can!!!

Sakina, thanx for the info about braiding, etc.  I will look it up!!!

Lisabelle, the snood you sent me is GREAT.  Having finally got the hair pins to keep it in place, I have worn it to work and had many complients.  Thank you  for your kindness!!! You are a saint.  

Ok, that is all I have to say tonight.  Gotta run,animals want my attention in a BIG way.  Take care all.

JD

Oh, BTW, I watched "Out o Africa" this morning.  I have seen it about 4 times and I still have not seen the begining of it or the ending of it (fustration).  If you are wondering why I brought this up, if you look at Susan's guide to ultimate hair care, she references it at least twice!!!

JD

Ugh, been sick in bed all of yesterday and until about 3 today.  It think it was nothing more than the stress of returning to work and the ex and money thing.  Seem to pretty much fine.  However, I did not get the crown molding or painting done this weekend.  Oh well.  Shame since here it was a long weekend and it would have been a good time and I had plans for the next 2 long weekends.  Guess I will have to fit it into a normal week to stay on schedule and since the other 2 weekends are out door weekends, I cannot mess around with those!!

Good news, I have not heard from ex.  Of course, I have made that next to impossible to do...but we will see.  I cannot block him phoning me at work!!

Since I am only working 3 days a week this week, and Monday was a Civic Holiday, I am not at work until Weds, which is good because my house is really behind in terms of cleaning after being out after work on Friday and then sick the last couple of days.  I got some jobs done since I got up...but need to do more...which I might do tonight so I can live the life of leisure tomorrow...stay in bed, relax with my animals, enjoy the weather (assuming it will be nice!!).  Oh and I need the house looking great since the folks have to come to put my dogs out on Weds since yet again I have to be out after work.  I think next Weds is the last time I have to do something after work.  Good thing.  I can't take the 16-18 hour days!!!!

I dunno about you folks, but after being sick, I feel like I need to shower, wash my hair, wash my bedding and crack the windows!!!  If I wash my hair I cannot go to bed before 10 so I might as well vacuum, finish up laundry, clean the bathroom and dust the bedroom.  Then my house work is up to date.  Then I can wake up without any stresses and just putt through my day.  Next week a go to 4 days a week at work (Mon-Thurs) so I think I should soak up this time!!!

Ok, so that is the plan...shower, clean and bed.  Hmm, hair.  Well, being sick I did not do my usual dose of Curlygirl64 deep condition so maybe I will use AG Deep tonight, leave it on for an hour end up staying up until 11.  That should have me up by 8 feeling rested and I can spend the day reading a book before going back to work on Weds.

Oh ya, I watched the movie 'Premomition" with Sandra Bullock tonight.  It was kinda slow in places but I must say, the ending was not what I expected.  I wont give it away.  From the trailer though, you know her days get all screwed up (I mean in accordance with a timeline).  One thing I could not get (for those of you that have seen it) was why she did not put the stickers on the window when Sunday finally came around, when she knew what would happen if she hadn't done it by Weds!!!  For those of you that have not seen it, you will get what I mean when you do.

Take care all.  If I get all my chores done and my hair is still wet, I will check out journals since I see I am way behind again!!!

JD

glad you are feeling better. i have the same thing too...need to get my room all aired out after being sick.
someday, you need to finish "out of africa" it's a great movie.

Happy to hear your feeling better! :)  Say, if you want to see something really crazy and scarey you should see the japanese verison of Premoniton.  I love japanese horror flicks, there twisted and off beat.   ::)

RTG, I am betting you are European.  I find that people here in Canada do not feel that need to freshen the house with fresh air after being sick (as a rule).  I think the reason is that in the winter it is AWFULLY cold here.  Window open (if you can get it open because it will likely be frozen shut) means you are frozen in about 10 minutes and then you might run the risk of the window freezing open which is VERY bad (nothing much you can do until a thaw...which could be a couple of months).  I live in Canada but my family (including both my siblings) where brought up in Europe so my families house is like a little piece of Europe in the middle of Canada.  When I was little and had just gotten over being ill, Mum would send me for a long hot bath while she changed the sheets and cleaned my room, then she would open the window and close the bedroom door (as I said, assuming she could open the window) and send me to sit in a blanket with a pillow in front of the fire until my bedroom warmed up again.  I think with heating costs and the terrible cold we can have in most parts of Canada, the fresh air after being sick...not always needed as much as you or I might need it!!!  Another problem in the part of Canada I live in, is that in the winter it can be minus 40 Celcius and in the summer it can be +40 Celcius in the summer so even in the summer it can be a problem because going into a room where you melt after venting it out, can be bad!!!  I really must look up what these temps are in F for you.  I will do that now, but I will post first incase I lose you all!!

Okay, did the conversion ( and did lose LL in the process).  Our temps typically range between -40f to 104f over a year.  I know that the city I live in is supposed to be the second coldest capital in the world (and I mean my country's capital..so no I am NOT in Toronto despite what many think...that is the capital of my province...I live in the capital of Canada).  Pls don't ask me what the first is.  Not living on the equator, I am kown we are no where near the warmest.   Hmm, no I am wondering where in the world (outside of the poles) has the widest variance in temp...something to look up tomorrow!!)

JD

Hair is doing okay.  I just don't think it has grown at all in the past couple of months.  I am due for a trim and color in 2 weeks, but my roots aren't really showing yet so I dunno.  Frustration.

I got the scalp massager.  It is pretty good.  I have noticed that using the whipped cream, the aloe vera massage and the massager are making my psoriasis a bit better.

I can't remember if I mentioned I would like to train for a triathlon.  I looked into doing the master swimming course.  It runs from Sept - June, costs $500 and is 3 days a week.  The real problem is that on Tues and Thurs it is at 9:30.  That would put me home around 11 with wet hair, and up for work at 4 the next morning. I dunno.   :-/  I mean, I don't want to make myself sick again!!  Oh ya, and of course it starts the first week I go full time!!

Saw my dermatologist yesterday.  He put me on new meds.  I think I mentioned that there is a treatment for my terrible nails (from psoriasis).  It involves needles under the nail.  He told me it would be extremely painful (talk about stating the obvious!!) and I would have to do it every 4 weeks for life.  Ok, not that vain!!!  He says they  might clear up now I am off the meds that made them so bad.  He said I will know if that is the case in about 6 months, although it will be a year before they fully heal if they will heal at all.  Say a little prayer for me.

That is it for me today.  Hope everyone is well.

wrote on Aug 9^th, 2007 at 6:43pm:

I can't remember if I mentioned I would like to train for a triathlon.  I looked into doing the master swimming course.  It runs from Sept - June, costs $500 and is 3 days a week.  The real problem is that on Tues and Thurs it is at 9:30.  That would put me home around 11 with wet hair, and up for work at 4 the next morning. I dunno.   :-/  I mean, I don't want to make myself sick again!!  Oh ya, and of course it starts the first week I go full time!!

Umm.  I forgot to check how many people had read this before I posted it.  Frankly folks, I want you all to hit me with your thoughts and opinions.  From extreme no to extreme yes and all in between, I just want some one else's opinion so I can think on.  Pls comment as you will ... as extremely as you would like!!!

JD

Triathalons are a huge commitment - especially if you have lots of other new things going on.  If you do decide to go ahead with it, I wish you lots of luck!

BB, you are right about the commitment.  I think I am going to work on getting myself back into work, lose the rolls of fat, train for the running portion, and then in the summer I will get the biking going.  Then maybe next year I will try the swimming and see how that goes.  Thanx for your support and thoughts BB.

JD

I also was considering training as a triathlete.  I decided that since I have a broken foot it would not be a good idea, even after I get the foot fixed.  Since it has been broken for almost 14 years, I am not at all sanguine that it will come back 100%.  Couple that with my two bad knees and...I just don't think running is in my future.  

However, I remember that the websites I looked at said running should come LAST in the training.  It said something about the damage to knees being caused primarily by runners starting training too quickly, especially when they had weight issues.  

I don't remember which sites I looked at, but one had a training guide.  I would google it.  And I would suggest doing the bicycling first.  Less stress on the joints than running, and less of a time committment than swimming.  

Oops.  I just remembered.  I'm thinking like a Texan.  I have that problem.  My husband and I got our first international jobs at a recruitment fair in Iowa.  We were blithely saying, "So we'll rent a car so we can stay in a cheaper hotel and drive in to the fair..." when we realized that the fair was in February and road conditions were probably not going to be anything we were used to driving in!  But as it turned out, that part of Iowa had a freakish warm spell that week, and the temperature was in the 50's.  Anyway, here we can bike year-round.  Probably isn't an option where you are.  Start with walking and lose the weight before you stress your knees.  'Cause once they go, it's bad news Charlie!  Trust me.  I know.  

Tex, you beat me to the punch.  I was about to say that cycling is not a reality in the winters here.  Some crazies do it but I am not getting out there and biking when it is minus 30 degrees celcius and the road are covered in snow!!!  That was why I said about starting cycling in the spring.  

I hear what you are saying about the knees.  I appreciate your input and certainly see your point.  My brother has been running for years, marathons and stuff, and he had to have knee surgery last year.  He still can't run.

I used to run daily until I got sick.  It got me really fit and, while getting out was tough at times, I always felt better after.  Of course, I am no where near fit now.   >:(  I have a proper running schedule for starting out again.  You know, start with 2 minute run, 2 minute walk etc, that last 10 weeks until you reach running 5k in 30 minutes or so, then another 10 weeks to the 10k point.

My GP told me to get back to running...despite the weight gain.  I was diagnosed with arthritis recently and she told me to get out there and work on the weight to help that.  She just said not to use the joints when the arthritis was flaring up.  Still, I am ruminating on what you are saying.  Maybe I should walk until Oct when I can sign up at the work gym again ($80 for a one year membership!!!!  you CAN'T beat that) and then I can start on the eliptical (sp?) which wont bother the joints.  Perhaps then in January I can start running...even if it must be on the treadmill for the most part with the weather such as it is here.  I have a treadmill here and of course work has them too.  I just hate running on my treadmill at home...I get soooo bored.  At least at the gym I can watch other people doing things!!  They have bikes at the gym too.  I wonder how much it would cost me to get a bike in the house to work on.  I think I could probably hear the TV over that...but cannot with the treadmill.  

JD

Ok, does anyone know anything about stationary bikes out there?  Treadmills and elipticals I know about...but not bikes!!

JD

Swimming is the least stressful for joints since there is no weight bearing while you swim.  Biking comes next since the joint stress is pressure, not weight.

I don't have a stationary bike but I do put my recumbent bike up on a trainer for the winter.  (No, I am not crazy enough to bike on snow and ice!).  If you have a bike that you are comfortable riding, you can purchase a trainer for it.  They connect to the back wheel and provide resistence while you spin away.  This is the least expensive option (although some trainers can be expensive, you can get them for less than $100).  Biking on a stationary or trainer is just as boring as the treadmill.  I recommend reading a book or watching a video/TV to keep you going.  Expensive stationary bikes can have computer programs built into them just like the treadmills, that will change the resistence to simulate going up hill, etc.  On a trainer, you can do the same thing by changing the gears on your bike.

If you don't already own a bike, I'd suggest you start looking into getting one.  They are a great form of exercise and transportation.

BB, thanx for the cheap fix.  I will look into that.  I have a bike, although I don't use it much.  The closest thing to me is over 20 km away and I am usually buying groceries which wont all fit in my saddle bags.  40 lbs of dog food, 30 lbs of cat food and 20 lbs of cat litter....a bit much!!!  I used to leave my bike at a girlfriend's so I could drop my car and bike to work.  I live 65 km from work so biking from here doesn't work and my girlfriend isn't around this summer.  Next summer!!  If I train for a triathlon I will have to buy a new bike at some point.  Mine is a Canadian Tire special that I have had for 24 years!!  It would be a little heavy for a triathlon!!  I would like to get a hybrid (is that the right word) so I can manage dirt roads.  I have a lot of those out here and with my 10 speed, it is a bit dicey!!  I will have to remember to talk to you when I can afford a new bike to see what you recommend.

JD

BB, I looked into trainers today.  They seem to start at about $150 here.  A friend of mine who likes biking as much as you is advising me so I don't buy one that is too cheap or too expensive for my needs.  He is really helpful with things like that.  Last year he revamped my 24 year old bike that I thought was useless for about $100 - everything from new tires, new gears, new handle bar tape, new brakes to a bell.  It was a lot cheaper than a $500 bike!!  Anyway, he is looking at a used one that he thinks would be good for me.  I wouldn't know what to look at so he is doing that and letting me know if I should look into it.  I will find out tomorrow...if it is even still available.  Meantime I am going to pull my bike down, pump up the tires and take her for a 5-10 k ride on Sat and Sun weather permitting.  Hell, maybe I will even go Friday depending on how my run goes and how long I am at the Harry Potter movie.  I think it is supposed to rain though.

Hair...Good God it is unhappy today.  I dunno what is up.  I think it hates Pantene.  I am going back to my AG once I get to a hair dresser.  That might be Friday too!!!  Actually it might be Weds when I go to the hospital.  There is a hairdresser there.  I washed yesterday with the icky tar shampoo using conditioner to protect the length.  It seemed ok.  Then today I went for a short run at lunch (ok, I know what I wrote yesterday...but I thought I would just give it a try for a week or so) and then I rinsed, conditioned and rinsed again.  It just seems...ugh.  I can't describe it.  I hope to take a short run again tomorrow but I think tonight I will set up an ACV rinse to take with me.  I don't want to poo it.  So I will try an ACV and condition.  I don't want to oil tonight because I am not sure what is wrong with it...on the flip side, it may be up in a 'bun' tomorrow so if it is bad it will work out ok... I guess.  HA, I just figured the problem with Pantene (or at least the one I have).  It has 3 cones in the first 10 ingredients!!  AG has one cone (about 20th on the list) in the whole thing.  Yup, AG it is for this girl.

The new meds for my body psoriasis seem to be working well.  It itches like crazy normally and I tend to scratch in my sleep so my doc told me to put a tensor on to protect myself.  That did not work.  The tensor made it itch so badly I could not sleep for trying not to rip the thing off and scratch it to bleeding (and I have done that before).  Now, as we all know, when sores are healing they itch...so if I thought it itched before I started using a good med on it....WOW!!  Hopefully in a week that will be done.

As for the nail psoriais...oh how I miss my beautiful nails...I will post pics of what they look like (although not mine since my hubby took my camera) in a sec so you can see how gross they are.   I have done some reading and it says to put the scalp medication under the nails (that oily stuff) and then massage the skin stuff on the cuticle and skin just below the nail and then wrap it in saran wrap.  Great...more to add to the bedtime routine.  It may or may not work...but I will try...but let me tell you it sucks.  I have great difficulty setting it up and then put cotton gloves over the hands so it does not come off.  Great.  Last night I just about died with the gloves, the tensors on my legs, arms and hip, the satin wrap on my head....It is too hot for this stuff....especially for a girl who sleeps nude in the summer.  Anyway...it is just for 2 weeks and then it will either work or not.  They tell you not to do it with the saran wrap for more than 2 weeks.  

I miss my beautiful nails that I had a year ago...and being fit and 40 lbs lighter like a year ago...and having skin that people remarked was nice...instead of the mess it is now...and having a husband to come home to...and planning a pregnancy. I feel like I was in a tornado and landed in Oz...but as the wicked witch instead of Dorothy.

I know, whining will do me no good...must work on getting fit, finding happiness with myself and THEN a man (and not before).  Hey, nobody told me I had great hair a year ago and they do now!!!  Patience and some hard work will make it all ok...except perhaps the nails and the baby...but we can't have it all...can we?

JD

My nails look like the ones in the pic with the subtitle "Total Nail Destruction".  Painting them is useless.  2 of my finger nails are no longer than the quick on your nails.  Plus they are so pitted, nail polish would look terrible even if they were not so short!!  Doc says keep them as short as possible, treat as aforementioned and hope for the best.

http://dermnetnz.org/scaly/nail-psoriasis.html

Wow!  That's gross.

I don't think you're whining, JD.  In order to move forward and beyond, it is important to be truthful about where you are now.

I hope your nails come back better than ever, sorry you have to endure so much to get there.

One foot infront of the other!!

Thanx Sakina

JD

jd, i'm sorry about your nails and skin giving you so much trouble! hope you are feeling better soon, and these symptoms go away for a while.
i have a stationary bike, one of the lower end ones, proform 70. it changes resistance based on what you program into it. it's pretty good, i use it in the winter while i watch tv. kind of boring, but gets me moving in a season when i'd prefer to be under the covers reading all the time b/c of the cold.
as for the triathlon-don't know if you already settled this one or not-it sounds like a great thing to try for next year, not this one. maybe this year you could keep working at getting into the shape you want to be in, and also let yourself adjust back to the longer work week again.
then next year you could plan time for the biking/swimming side of it too. i think you should go for it, could be very motivating and satisfying to complete, but don't burn yourself out with taking it on too quickly.

RTG, thanx for the encouragement.  I have decided against too much swimming this year...but am toying with an adult learn to swim.  I need to check into it.  Obviously if it is a staight course for adults that can't swim...I would not be welcome there, but I thought if I could go it might help me improve and have me on a set schedule to be there.  It is only on Thurs night, costs $79 for 10 weeks and is done by 8:30 at night.  It would get me used to swimming again anyway.

As for the bike thing...I found a good trainer for $100 off.  It is usually $239 + 15% tax, but I found a used one (which my biking buddy checked out and said if I didn't buy it he would) for $160 flat.  I am getting it on Friday.  Meantime, I clocked it is 14 km round trip to the convenience store down the road.  I would NEVER shop there...it is so dirty and the prices!!!  Anyway, it is a landmark to get me started.  I am hoping for Sat....but not sure of the forecast.

Hair...still awful.  Did the ACV at lunch after my short run and a light condition (if I don't my hair is a huge knot).  I have to get a conditioner that works for me.  Pantene and I are through... as soon as I can get my old conditioner.  In the meantime...I will have to wash tonight.  I was trying for Friday morning (not working on Fridays yet)  after a short run.  Not practical.  I have to look professional at work. I can't do the shabby look.  Sigh.  Oh well.  Such is life...and on that note, I had better get it washed now so I am not up with it too late drying.

Hope all are well.

JD

I called the pool and am going for a tour on Sat to see how I feel about the Thurs night course.  It finishes at 7:45 so I would be back here by 9 with almost dry hair and I would only have Friday to get through.  Thinking on.

Did not wash hair after all.  Used my antique brush I mentioned many posts ago (and hae been trying not to use since I am not sure how to clean it) and hair looks ok now.  Maybe it just needed a brush instead of a comb???  Ok, so I might regret this decision if I have to get in the shower at 4 tomorrow morning...but I have done EVERTHING I can go make my morning really easy if I have to wash it.  Coffee pot set to brew at 3:50, cat tuna set in cat dishes in fridge, dog bowls FULL (they only eat what they need these days as opposed to when they were young and were vacuums), lunch is made and in the fridge, smoothie for breakfast is ready, clothes are laid out for the morning, makeup is on the counter ready to use, animal water bowls are filled to the max, car is reversed into garage, keys and work pass are by the front door, alarm is set 15 minutes early, leaving the curtains open to let in the cooler night air, left a bunch of stuff on the kitchen counter for my folks to take when they come to let the dogs out tomorrow (will be out about 16 hours tomorrow so doggie day care needed)...I think that is it.  Wish me luck...day 3 in a row at work for the first time in 9 months, might have to wash hair and have 2 hours at the hospital on top of work tomorrow.  I'm ready though!!  Going to bed early...night all.

JD

Yup, had to poo this morning.  Didn't condition.  Hopefully it will dry okay now!!!

JD

jd-please come to my house and organize me for mornings!!!! wow, you have it down to a science there. i don't mind relaxed mornings, but hate having to rush to get ready really early.

LOL, no problem RTG, next time I can afford a holiday, you put me up in Finland (?) and I will organize your life to death!!!  I have had many friends say I should quite my job and contract myself for organizing homes, bills, files, offices (personal ones that is) etc.  I love organization and routine.  I am kinda fanatical about it.  I couldn't do it for a living though...not enough stimulation for this scientific brain.

Went to the hospital today.   Doc is pleased with my health.  He says I am doing all the right things and seem strong and sure of myself.  I will feel better once I am not a round ball!!!  Good news is that I don't have to go to the hospital for a month.  This is much better than every 2 weeks.

My hair is still funky.  Now it is frizzy.  Lord.  I will have to think up something to do with it this weekend in an attempt to fix it.  I just have no clue what!!!

Oh I mentioned about the Thurs. swim.  It would not be nearly enough to do a triathlon after...but it is a start to get my feet wet so to speak.  I have not swam in about 5 years and then it was only a leisurely breast stroke without submerging the head.  Maybe I will do the Master course next year if I feel good.  I might be making an assumption here, do people outside of North America call it the Master program or should I find and supply a definition?

Day 3 of 4 done (back at work 4 days a week instead of 3 this week) and going okay.  I am a little tired...but not a big surprise since I am not used to being on the go so many days in a row and today was a long day.  Enjoying work and am glad to be back.

JD

lol jd-finland sounds cool but i think that's a different longlocker you are thinking of. i'm in north america.

I think it's galadriel that's in finland, where she has that pretty garden and all.

K, you are right, Gad is in Finland but for some funny reason I thought that RTG was too.  Blonde moment I guess.

Hair:  It is really not liking Pantene...I know it works for many here but it makes my hair greasy and flat....different hair, different needs.  Still, I have not given it up yet...have a half full bottle and no money to replace it...and my hair is really showing it.  Money is money and I will get the AG my hair seems to love on Thursday when I get my hair cut and colored.  Told hairdresser I did not want her to trim the length (after losing an inch the last time after she told me I had no split ends!!!) but I want my color done (she does an awesome job of that) and my bangs.


Life:  Work is great...but still tring to figure how I fit it all in (based on the past) considering that I leave for work at 5:30 am and get home at 4:30 pm.  To boot I get up at 4 am to deal with my animals and after work I have to clean my house and look after 5 animals.  It ends up that I am on the go from 4 am until 6-7 pm and go to bed at 8 pm....Remember that dinner is not calculated into the equation between doing what I have to and the work!!!

While it is tough...I would not give up my little four legged kids for the world...and I know if I had my dream and had a human kid it would be much worse. Guess I couldn't balance it all...what I cannot figure is why God would refuse me kids....but have taken me out of the vet business PLUS left me in a situation where I cannot bring in puppies when these precious babies are gone....

Gotta to go...sorry, I have had no time to read other journals the past few days...you are all in my thoughts...and I will read them all...when I can.  Happy to be busy again...just wonder why it has to be all or nothing.

JD

Hello All,

Tired again today.  I did a lot of house cleaning last night so I have a quiet weekend ahead of me which makes it worth it!!!  Sooo, I will not be reading journals tonight...need to work out a budget tonight.

Hair:  Psoriasis is bugging me and since I cannot do the oily medication treatment when I am working (makes hair super greasy and no time to shower in the morning...get up at 4 am as it is!!!) I have been using the tar shampoo at night.  Last night I didn't use any conditioner after since Pantene seems to be bugging me...hair was good today.  Tomorrow I will get my old conditioner when I get to the hair dresser.  That will help and I can treat the psoriasis Thurs night thru to Sat night (3 days) with the oil stuff since I only have to take the dogs to be groomed on Friday and I will just shove a baseball cap on or tie my hair up and put a bandana over it all!!!

The Good:  I have mentioned a friend with whom I used to leave my bike and then we could bike to and fro work but she was on French training so I have not been able to do that this year.  She showed up in my office today to tell me she finally got her Level C (God the testing is tough!!!) and she will be back to work on Sept 3rd.  So after she has had a week to adjust to working again...we will start biking and we will run together at lunch (great motivation for me!!!).  Ok extra 40 lbs...we are now officially getting the motivation to get rid of you!!!!!

Also, I got a disability check yesterday which seemed to me was double what I should get.  I phoned and questioned it and it seems it is right.  A whole bunch of rules changed when I went back to work part time.  This is great since it will help me get rid of some of the debt I accumulated during my 8 months on disability.  YAHOO!!!  All being well, I really will have got rid of all the debt by the end of March and will hopefully have lost about...28 of the extra 40 lbs.  Now I just have to pray my car lasts at least 2 years (frankly not likely I am afraid) and I will be okay!!!

The Bad:  Well, I still have not lost any weight, the real Joey has what appears to be an abcess on his foot so that will cost me about $100 to get fixed...assuming it is only an abcess...not something worse, having gained 40 lbs since I left work...I have no fall clothes so I have to go buy a minimal wardrobe for the fall/winter, winter is coming (which is when my health really suffers and I have no sick leave or vacation time until April...pray I do not get so much as a cold...much less my big health problem), I have several $100 extra (as in not bills, mortgage and food) expences coming up in the next 2 weeks (about 5) and that does not include Joey and I am finding the 4 days of work very tiring (sp?) so I am worried about going to 5  in just 2 weeks!!!  Tell me that was not a run on sentence!!!!!!!

Of interest (at least to me):  Saw a woman today with beautiful blonde classic length hair today.  She was a lollipop (sp) woman...oh sorry, that is very English.  She was a flag peron...you know...the people who have the "stop/slow" sign when road construction is going on.  Three things came to mind for me with this:  i) her hair must need washing every day with the dirty from the road construction, ii) sun damage and most importantly iii) the damage to the hair with the construction hat!!!.  I dunno if you have every looked at one but they have a really hard, often rough plastic thingy inside to make the hat adjust to your head size!!  I would be putting it up in a bun and wearing a bandana.

Ugh...I have the TV on right now and an Australian Sheep Dog just died in the show...too close to home for me right now as I watch my beautiful Joey age in body but stay so young and sweet in mind...Not much time left...Gotta go, must do something to take my mind off it.
LOL...one sign I am not doing well emotionally is that I rock like a child when I am upset....and I just started rocking.  

Later folks.

JD

you hang in there,JD!  Rock if you have to,it's ok.  Your baby is just fine and he'll let you know he's fine!

*hug* I hope everything works out well for you. Cherish the months/years you still have with your Joey and let that comfort you, as well as the knowledge that you do have good friends behind you.

(((hugs))) We are all with you and I know you can loose the weight! :)

Hang in there!  We are all rooting for ya.  

*hugs*  Just take life one day at a time; in reality, that's all any of us can do.   8-)

Holy Cow!!!  Gee ladies...I am so touched that you all read this and responded to me.  Thank you so much for your support!!!  It is nice you will all be here when it comes to be...  Tonight I went out and spent a tonne of money buying him the best dog food for him...he has always had that as has Tatty (my other baby dog or 'Puppy as I call her...who is 14) but I didn't just buy the hard food, I bought the soft too so he will eat better (Tatty has always been a grazer but Joey was always a vacuum but isn't anymore).  Of course I had to run out of cat food too and my 3 cats get the best of everything (but no soft food...just a teaspoon of tuna in the morning because that is the only way I can get the potassium I need into Adam and what you do for one you must do for all).  So, the animal shopping cost me $107 today.  Ouch...but they are so worth it.

Tomorrow is a busy day.  I have to have the dogs in to the groomers by 8.  I used to do it myself but with Joey being so arthritic and me not having proper tubs and stuff...I am afraid of him falling in my tub so I send him to be done at a vet clinic.  I could do Tatty myself but I worry about separating the dogs.  Tatty never takes it well but if I was bathing her she wouldn't have time to think about it...but I worry Joey might stress so I am sending them both.  $120 dropped there.  Unfortunately Joey is unsteady on his feet but Tatty still jumps on him...when he is peeing and pooing and he falls into his own pee and poo.  I wipe him down and he does not smell or look bad...but it worries me so he needs to be done.

Naturally, it never rains but pours.  I have a himalayan named Yoda who is impossible to brush.  When hubby was here, we would pin the poor little guy down once a week and give him a quick brush but there is no way I can do it alone...at least not his belly.  So I had phoned an old colleague from my vet years and asked if she could help me clip the matts on his tummy.  Naturally she called tonight and said tomorrow at 11:30.  Oh great.  Oh well, the other two kitties are domestic short hairs so they don't need anything doing.  They both enjoy a little brush and don't need much to get the job done.

Oh, of course this will involve over 100 km of driving for me since I live in the boonies!!  Still, I could never leave here.  I love it.

Hair:  I went and got my roots touched up tonight at my hairdresser's.  I bought my favorite conditioner again...will be so glad to have it again...pantene did not fair me well.  Actually, it was interesting...I mentioned to my hairdresser that I had bought Pantene but did not like what it did for me and also asked her how bad my psoriasis looked.  She said the psoriasis wasn't too bad, why did I ask.   I told her that my scalp was itching so badly that I was waking up at night.  She told me some clients with sensitive scalps have told her pantene does that to them after using it for about 3 weeks.  True?  I dunno.  Frankly it does not matter because I don't like what pantene does to my hair.

I told my hairdresser only to trim the ends if their were split ends...she did not cut anything off the length.  I have bangs so she did those for me.  She also respects that I do not want my hair blow dried.  She just blow dries the bangs to make sure they are cut right...and that is ok since they literally double in length between visits so I know that it is all new hair (once cut) that can take one blow dry.

She did a good job of the color.  While I was there I bought some shampoo for my hair too.  Again, my favorite commercial poo but I bought a small bottle because I only use it after I do the oily psoriasis medication.  Usually I use my Ida of Chagrin poo and of course the tar poo.  Anyway...the conditioner will last me a year (2L bottle) but the whole venture was $128.  Ugh again about money.  

You all probably think I have money right now.  Nope.  I do not.  Still, the babies get what they need.  So does the hair.  I see a lot of eggs and toast in the next month or so for meals.  Good thing I cooked and frozen other dinners and avocado that I can make soup with (intended for hair recipes)...and I have frozen veggies.  Oh, and I have about 10 meals worth of frozen chicken.  I might have about 10 meals of frozen cheap fish, which is freezer burned...but wont make me sick.  So, really...keeping it down I just need milk, decaf coffee and gas...to bad I need so much gas!!!  House renovations will have to wait for a while I guess.  

I never measured my hair this month.  I need someone to do it for me and I didn't see the point in having Mum do it tonight when I might not have all that length after being there (going to hair dresser and all.  I will wait until September now.  I can have one of the women at work do it for me.

This weekend is a 'treat psoriasis' weekend.  That means oily, icky hair for the next couple of days.  Oh well.

Again, thanx everyone for your support and being here.  You folks are the best.  Tomorrow I will get to all your journals...just to wrapped up in me and tired tonight...sorry.

JD

Hello All,

Well, I finally got through some of your journals today.  I hope you all understand that with being out of the house for 10-12 hours a day on the days I work, 5 little animals and a house to clean...it is not disrespect...just a busy life!!!

It was a busy day today.  The dogs went to the groomers for 8 today...20 km east of where I live.  Yoda went and got clipped (where needed, not the lion cut by any means) today...20 km the opposite direction from (to the dog thing) from my house.  I did groceries (20 km yet another way today).  Then I went and picked up the dogs...yup 20 km.  So today I drove $160 km just doing jobs.  LOL, I drive 130 a day for work...weekends are supposed to be easier!!!

I fired my dog groomer today.  She told me she would have them done in 4 hours and it took 8!!!  Not a problem normally but with these guys are so old...they stress...especially Tatty.  On top of that, I took them out of the clinic and they both squatted instantly to pee...they had to go for more than a minute!!!  Obviously they had not been out all day.  Also (and perhaps what makes me the maddest) when we got home I gave them each a Dentabone (for those of you who don't have dogs...only death would keep a dog from taking one of these 10 minute chews) and they were too busy drinking up my two  2 L (full might I add) bowls of water for the cats!!!  And when they finished they saw the bones and each left to hit a toilet bowel for more water before they came for the bones!!!!  Obviously they had no water all day and I hate to think how warm it must have been for them to need so much!!!

Yoda's clipping went well.  He was not impressed but it only took about 10 minutes because I caught it before there were a lot of matts and they were not all the way down to the skin.  He is just getting over it having been home for 6 hours now...and I restrained him the whole time so he was not alone like my poor little dogs.  Oh, don't think Lion Cut, he just had a few matts on his tummy taken off.

Hair:  Well, doing the psoriaris battle for the scalp so it is coated in the oily stuff right now.  I am getting ready to wash with the tar shampoo in a few minutes.  Ugh.  Iteresting point...my hairdresser told me that the stuff is so vicsious it takes polish off a polished floor.  Just out of curiousity this morning I put some polish on a piece of wax paper, waited for it to dry, put the tar poo on it and left it for 5 minutes (as I am supposed to) and then rinsed it.  She was totally right!!!  Ok, glad someone (either BB or Sakina) suggested putting conditioner on the length when I poo with this stuff.  Think I will condition all but the inch near my scalp from now on!!!  But as my hair dresser said...it works to use the tar poo so you have to use it!!

That is all...except that I don't seem to be getting notifications from Lisabelle's posts for some reason so I will check that and then wash my hair!!

JD

Hello All,

Thought I would drop a quick note to let you all know I am still alive.

Saturday I decided on a quite day without the computer.  I do that all day every day at work now.  Then Sunday I sank into the new Harry Potter book.  Wow, I loved it.  You should have seen me trying to make lunches and care for the animals while still reading!!!  Monday I worked and then came home and read the last 100 pages of Harry Potter.  Then, with my house cleaning 3 days behind I got a call from my cousin asking if he and his family (wife plus a 2 year and an 8 month old) could come and stay with me this weekend.  I have 3 days to prepare.  Yahoo!!!  It will be fun...but what an awful weekend for him to chose.  It is my last before I go full time, I am behind on my house cleaning and now I have to make the cleaning better than usual, prepare meals AND change my office into a bedroom for me so that the children and parents can stay in my bedroom (big bedroom with ensuite).

Anyway, as you can tell I will be busy the next few days so I am sorry I will be very behind on your journals and wont be around for 5 - 10 days (but all is well).

Oh, btw the owner of the groomers called me to apologize for the staffs behavior and is doing my dogs for free in December.  Since I had never had trouble there before (and the owner was away due to an emergency surgery this last time) I decided it should be ok.

Hair, nothing to tell that is new.

JD

Oh, btw I do love my old conditioner.  Hair is much happier.

JD

Eek, it sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now. You can do it!

Hey there folks,


What can I tell you, life has been busy.  Hmmm how do I cut this short.  Well, my family left England when I was 3.  I am the ONLY menber of me family (either side...inclucing siblings) raised outside of England.  I told you I had family coming with kids from England.  Peter (the cousin that came) came with his wife Jo (or Johanne) who are the only relatives I have seen since I went to England when I was 14 (and btw I paid my own way with airfare while the folks paid my stay there and I am now 39).  Peter and Jo came 9 years ago when they were not married.  Now they have come, married and with two children.

Well they came to stay with me this weekend and then they are going to the folks...LOL they (my folks) have not had a baby in the house since me!!!  Could be tough on them.  

Anyway...here is where I am going.  As soon as my cousins (because I really consider Jo as a cousin..not a cousin in law...well lets say we hugged when she came and she held on much longer than I antipated...but I was happy to see that) showed up we were ok.  They stayed the first night in my room and they had the little one on the floor to sleep next to the bed...and go figure, it started crawling that night!!!  Sooo, while they had been comfy with her just sleeping on the floor with padding next to them...it was not okay when she was crawling!!!

Okay, so Jo is a cool Mum and said she would deal and I was not happy because I knew she could not be sleeping well worring about the little tike!!!  And here is where the real story starts...I knew I had friend with beds they could afford to give up for the little sweety...but they were over 100km from me (each way) and they were probably away.  Sooooo, I went to my next door neighbout to ask them where I could rent a cot.  I hit the hubby who said he would have to ask his wife who was outl  An hour later she showed up with a bed, insisted on setting it up for my cousins and laughed and smiled and said "NO PROBLEM!!!!"  Some people are SOOO GOOD.

Well I had better run.  Right now "Mum and Dad" are having rest and the 8 month year old and the 2 year old are asleep on my bed with me...but I see the 2 year old is waking up...and I want to keep her busy.  I think I can scoop up the baby and keep her in my arms asleep while the 2 year old can play outside with the dogs...who she loves..while Mum and Dad can get some sleep.  And feeling  baby...I diaper change might be order before she cries!!!  Want the parents to get some sleep!!!

JD

BTW, my cousins and my parents have both decided I should have had a dozen children because the kids love me.  Jo is feeling she is getting a real break because while they may start crying for her....for the most part I can play the 'class clown' well enough that they are okay without her for an hour or two longer than they would be without he normally.  See...I think animals are a lot like children in their needs...I can make them happy for a while... :'(  Dunno why God never granted me children.  I love them so...

Glad to hear your doing okay!  (((hugs))) please don't be sad about childern.  You never know what life has in store for you.  Me, I am happy to be Mummy to my bunny and Aunt to my neice. :)

Hey K,

You are sweet.  My family was astounded how the kids reacted to me so postively.  Ithink they are alot like my4 legged kids.  I love them to death and I will spoil them all!!  And they all seem to love me.  But for whatever reason...I have been foresaken 2 legged kids.  Computer seems to be having trouble.  At least 20 times I have had an error message as I write this...so if you even get it is dubious...plsu kitty is helping me type!!!.

Alright, I am having a paddy, temper tantrum, pity pot moment or what ever you want to call it.  I swear to God the way I feel right now, the hair is all coming off this week!

I spent 40 minutes trying to braid it tonight.  I do this a lot, trying to learn.  Still I can't manage it.  In fact, tonight was the worst because as I tried to do it I could feel and hear my hair breaking.  Just to make it worse, I decided to comb my hair into sections and now it is all greasy...having just washed it today ready for work tomorrow!!!  I oiled my combs and I guess they still had oil on them between the tines.  So know I have to get up at 3:30 am so I can wash it for the 4th day in a row since I had to do the psoriasis treatments all weekend.  For crying out loud!!!  Clear I am not fit to care for it or competent to do anything nice with it so why bother????

OH!!!  Sorry, had to vent...just maybe tomorrow I will change my mind...but I can tell you it is not looking good right now!!!!

JD

Sorry, JD, for your hair struggles.  I know it can be really frustrating learning to do a braid.  Can you put your hair in a bun?  I do that with slightly greasy hair to hide the grease.  Got any scarves?  That's great camo for a greasy head.

Good Luck and don't give up!!!  THAT would be worse!!!!!!

Can you braid rope?  Maybe practice with rope or yarn will help get your coordination going.  Also, maybe consult a hairdresser for tricks/tips.

JD (((hugs)))  I've had those fits too.  Sakina has the best advise.  When my hair goes nuts it into a bun or under a scarf and the hell wiht it for a while. http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/a0/rude.gif

Sakina and Lisabelle,

Thanx for your kind words.  I guess I was a little impatient by last night.  You know how it is when even separating coffee filters gets you annoyed!!  Probably was after having the kids here all weekend.  I loved it...but it involved a lot of patience as children always do!!!

Sakina, your suggestion about rope braiding is excellent.  Thing is I  can French braid (which is as tough as I have done) other people's hair...but I can't seem to braid mine at all.  Grrr!!

Buns....well, I can do a messy type bun...in other words where you loop it through a scrunchie and leave the ends out so it looks like a kind of bun.  I haven't worked on those, but maybe I should instead of braids since I seem to be all thumbs.

As for scarves...you know, Dad used to have to go to Italy evey 2 years around Xmas and he used to bring all we women beautiful silk scarves.  I still have them all...some still with the plastic envelope.  I think I have about 30 and they are wonderful.  Maybe I should start playing with that.  I hve bun covers from Lady Snood but even the part right next to my head was greasy.  Heck, I was so frustrated I would HAVE to wash it...I covered it all in coconut oil last night.  Made it nice and soft.

And of course I have the snood that Lisabelle sent me.  Again, about 1 inch from the roots the grease was showing!!!

Of course you are both right!!!  Cutting it all off would be worse!!!  I will learn to do these things!

I was thinking as I signed on that, come the New Year, I hope to change my journal name to something a little more positive like..."Joeydog recovering from a bad spell" or something.  I dunno.  Lots of time to think about it.  Heck, 8 months ago I was in hospital unable to work, run my house or anything else.  Ok...ya, I have to lose the 40 lbs I gained, pay off the debt, try to get my skin healthy, start a new relationship when the time is right, etc...but I am on the right track now...just a big set back.

LOL, speaking of big set backs, today I went for electrolysis after work and I mentioned to my spa person about having the 8 month and 2 year old here for the weekend.  She asked me if they were my grandkids... >:(.  Okay, with that statement I had the startling revolation that it could be so if I had started relatively early and my kids had to...Hell, I am only 39!!!!  Funny, I have always been told I look to be in my early 30's.  Guess this round with the disease had its price to pay (other than the husband, the finances, etc..like that was not enough!!!).  But worry not, I am not aging gracefully...No, no surgery for this gal, but a good diet, some good skin and hair care and I should be okay again...I hope!!!

JD

Phew, the weekend whizzed by!!!!  I was really busy but did have time to do stuff for my hair.  On Friday I did an EVOO infused with rosemary and sage condition.  Then I had to wash on Sat morning because I had to go see my family (God Bless them, they are great).  Saturday night I had to do the awful psoriasis treatment on my scalp so I COVERED my hair in coconut oil (my cats love that!! the lick and lick and lick while I try to send them away nicely).  Today I did a scalp care with an oil that is not for my psoriasis.  I then massaged my scalp with my scalp massager for at least 15 minutes.  I then put cocao butter in my hair because it really loves it....but I always have to wash after.  When I hit the shower tonight I exfoliated my scalp using a 50/50 mix of brown sugar and conditioner, then I massaged my scalp with aloe juice.  After that I did a rinse with ACV.  Then I washed my hair with my soap for Ida of Chagrin, conditioned, put my hair into a tubie twist for 30 mintues (in between which I did a facial) and then I used Curly 64's recipe for a leave in.  Hair is happy.

I have not taken care of my body skin for weeks...well months.  This weekend I put coconut oil all over my body at least 10 minutes before I showered.  I did dishes and stuff because you can not sit down with that stuff on you.  As a moisturizer, I personally love the Body Shop Cocoa butter.  To cut a very long story short, I was compelled to add vitamin E to the mix. I am THRILLED.  It is like I never neglected my body.  My skin is like silk again.  I am soooo happy.  Plus, since the moisturizer is not cheap...the vitamin E expanded the amount a lot.  I had about 1/2 container of the moisturizer left.  I put 3 tbsp of vitamin E in (gradually to ensure I would not end up with an oil like texture).  I love it and will continue to do it.

As for my poor nails....well...I don't have much hope they will ever be okay again thanx to the psoriasis.  I keep them cut short...and I cannot explain short.  Well, let me try....my pinky nail is 3 mm from the cuticle!!!!   It is hard to imagine that a year ago they were beautiful and long...and I was thin and fit.  Sigh.  Okay, so the nails may never be fixed.  I hope my body will!!!

JD

I LOVE the body shop's cocoa butter body butter.  Its the best for my skin, plus hubby loves how it smells.

I cannot survive winter without it!

Good for you for taking time out to pamper yourself!!!

Hey all,

Well my first week full time is off to a great start (this statement is dripping with sarcasm!!).

Last night I started to feel icky.  By bed time I was roasting hot and could not sleep.  I did not sleep all night.  Morning (gave up and got up at 3 am instead of 4 am) found me with a sore throat, sniffles, a stuffed up head and feeling terrible.  I must go to work, I have NO leave until April.  I take care of the animals and sit quietly with a cup of coffee until 4 at which point a go into the bathroom, brush my teeth and wash my face.  For the first time, I then look in the mirror.  Great, my facial skin has not looked so bad since I was a teen.  Add this to the apparently permanent loss of my nails and being the size of a beached whale.  Then I see it.  The whole white of my right eye is red.  I don't mean blood shot red...I mean hematoma red.  Lovely.  Can't take time off, can see okay and eye does not hurt.  Life must go on.  No point in putting on makeup though.  I moisturize skin in a desperate attempt to make it look better...no luck.  I drop my hair from the satin sox and the pony tail and my hair is flat and nothing.  I mean it looked terrible.  No time to wash now and no energy.  It is only 16 degrees out (Celcius) and I only have summer clothes (seemed this was okay as I had to run the desk fan in my office all day as I was still ROASTING while all my colleagues are putting sweaters on).

I work hard all day.  I don't even have time for lunch anymore between work and running on the 3 days I run.  Lets not forget that Thurs at lunch I have to go get some clothes.  Keep in mind, for me to buy clothes I have to drive 100 km round trip to get anywhere with clothes...and lets not forget that I have a different outfit for each of 2 weeks easily...if I wasn't 40 lbs heavier than last year.  Grrr.

Oh, I forgot, when I got to eat lunch I realized my lunch had gone bad!!  Great, I have a headache at the time because I am so hungry so I go downstairs to buy an unhealthy and expensive lunch at the caff.   Better yet, crowds...I can't stand to be near more than about 6 people at a time and now I am in a room with about 200, don't like the daily specials and since I don't know what else the caff offers for lunch (as in 5 years I have never eaten down there) so I end up with a stale sandwich that was probably made 5 years ago and is wrapped in God knows what.

Of course, feeling tired and sick, I forget on the drive home that I do not have a lunch for tomorrow (the food I made for lunch today was supposed to last me until I did groceries on Thurs and I don't know what went wrong but the cold meats were greasy and smelly!!!!).  There is a quick little grocery store I drive by on the way home but I forgot.  Great, now I have nothing for lunch tomorrow either considering that all I have in the house is carrots, celery, lettuce and cucumber.  That will not sustain me when I am running at lunch tomorrow.  Guess I get another stale sandwich tomorrow because I am not driving 45 km round trip tonight!!!  I think I will buy it first thing in the morning so I can avoid the crowds. I can put it in my lunch room fridge for when I want it.

Okay, so I get home and I am determined that I am going to start cleaning my house and I start...but the cold is winning so I sit down with a glass of water and think "There is time before the busy weekend and I will just do a blitz on Friday night."  I curl up on my bed with my water and relax.   I think I just have to set up the animals' food tomorrow morning, my coffee, set up my running clothes and do a couple of dishes.  Oh, wait, the hair is terrible.  Ok, I hit the shower.  

Of course as soon as I get out of the shower the folks call and tell me that they would like to come and bring dinner for me on Friday night.  I can never say no to them.  I love them dearly...and they will not be here much longer.  I love to see them.  As I speak to them I look around my house and think that unless I get moving cleaning tonight I will never have it clean by Friday.  Its not that I run a bad house but with 5 animals (one that vomits a lot because of the diabetes, one that loses control of his bowels...which of course I clean all of it up as soon as I find itbut that alone can take 15 minutes twice a day, the fur from them all, the basic mess a kitchen and bathroom gets into in a week, etc).  

At first I just about freaked...and then I said to myself, this is silly.  I am sick, I am tired and I have enough on my plate.  Fine, the house will not be from House and Home when my folks come.  Such is life.  

I am thinking a nice spicey coconut milk soup (yes I know coconut milk is a laxative), lots of water and a REALLY early night.  Hopefully my hair will be dry by 7 which will give me 9 hours to sleep...and if I wake up early, maybe I will get the kitchen clean.  Heck, folks have no need to be in my office, me bedroom or my bathroom.  Maybe I can still get the rest clean.

So, while I luv you all...no time for other journals tonight.  This was my personal rant so I wont do it all in my head when I am trying to go to bed.

Now, I am going to set up my coffee and finish setting up for morning.  Really hoping to be in bed soon.  Of course, that is all up to the hair!!

Thanx for listening folks.

JD

oohhh,feel better!!!

I'm sorry you're so sick!  I hope you feel better soon!!!!!

(((hugs))))  Feel better soon! http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/950/bouquet.gif

Thanx everyone.  I am feeling a little better today.  I did't sleep again and got out of bed wondering how I would make it through the day.  
Work kept me busy enough that the day went by ok.  I am a fire warden at work (as in one of the people that evacuates and stays until all are off my floor).  When I got into work the new idiot of a safety manager had given us hints that a fire alarm was going off today.  I say she is an idiot because the gov't tests the wardens by not telling us if it is a drill or not AND blocks off certain routes of exit so we have to adapt.  She even told us what routes the gov't were blocking  :o.  The end result (having been a warden for 5 years) I had all the new wardens from my floor in my office from 8-9:30 questioning me on the protocol, etc since we haven't had a fire alarm drill for 3 years  :o and they have only been in the role for 1 year max.  End result, being that I am in a cubicle, everyone around us heard and EVERYONE on my floor knew a fire alarm was coming.  What kind of drill is that?  If it was happening on my floor, I am sure it was happening on others!!!

Still somehow the drill went to hell.  I admit that my floor did well, but others had wardens that did not report into security (set place to do this) that the floors were clear of people, etc. Darn, if we can't do it right when more than 1/2 the people (I mean staff, not just Wardens) know it is coming....God help us if we have a real problem.  OUr last safety officer NEVER gave us a clue and we got through in 9 minutes, not 12....and at that they sent the firemen in to check that the floors really were evacuated because of the 2 floors that did not report (this is easy for firemen as we put out cones if the floor is clear...but imagine if there was a real fire....would there be cones left for them to see!!!).

After the drill all the wardens go to the caff to discuss how the drill went or problems we had.  As I think I mentioned, I am the head warden on my floor (just because I have been there longest, not becuase I have done anything great or wonderful...all been drills).  There I learned that 'my' wardens were locked out of rooms (high security so need a pass with recognintion for those rooms to enter) they are supposed to 'sweep'.  I (and many other head wardens with the same problem) were told to contact the 'safety head' with this type of info so it could be rectified.  This was told to us by the Director.  I did so.  I got back an email saying we were all DENIED!!!!!!  Which is more, in the email she sent me, she did not know I was a warden, much less the head warden, she did not know which alternates (people who help the wardens and who fill in if we are sick, on holiday or not on the floor when an alarm goes because we are in a meeting...we are NOT to return to our floor in such a case but to follow the word of the warden in the area we are in) worked with which warden and did not even know who my alternate was.   Wow, am I impressed.  She started this job 2 years ago.

In my annoyance, I requested to meet with her immediately.  At our meeting, she suggested to me that my alternates and wardens HAD access (might I add I watched them all swipe their passes and saw that they did not) and that one of them was damaging and stealing from the 3 rooms in question!!!!  Keep in mind that she did not even know who we all were which means, without her ok, we did not have access...which all but me (and even I was locked out of one room) were locked out of!!!!

I asked her if cleaner had access to these rooms.  She looked shocked.  I repeated the question about 10 times before I grew angry and DEMANDED an answer.  Yes, they do.  In the 8 months I was gone the cleaners were stealing endlessly apparently.  In the end they were nailed because they used to work nights and a couple of them started stealing USB keys.  Those keys show when people last logged in on the gov't computer.  NOBODY, but NOBODY is allowen in the building between 11 pm and 6 am...except security and the cleaners.  The keys were 'recovered' and showed transactions at 1-4 am.  The gov't rhen ruled they could only come in the offices between 9 am and 3 pm.  Still keys disappeared, head phones, coffee mugs...but the killer was a single credit card taken from a friend of mine's wallet when he had an emergency and left his desk without thinking about the wallet.   Now we believe the culprits have been fired but clearly it makes more sense that the culprits did the harm, not the wardens and alternates that did not have access!!!!!  And while I did, the damages were done while I was not there!!!  Lets do the math.  Anyway, access still denied and mine will be revoked.

I gathered the wardens and altenates from my area and told them this pathetic story.  Then one, who reminds me sooo much of my brother (and I adore my brother) said, in the same tone and manner as my brother would, "Fine, I want it in writing that we are not responsible for people in these rooms and then, so be it.".  No attitude, just pure common sense in his mannerism and voice.  

So that is what I told them.  Oh, and my alternate (that they didn't know existed and went to first aid training in Dec got an invo to go to the training again this month and I have not been trained for 4 years.  Man I love this new safety person!!!

JD

Ok, thanx to all who read my rant last night and continue to read my journal.  Sorry, needed to vent.

Tonight is hair alone.

Hair is doing okay although I have found it is getting knotted only using the wood wide tooth comb.  I notice because twice I have been in a situation where I have had to use a brush (could not find my wide tooth wood comb at work).  My hair looked so much better after the brush even though I know it damaged it. Especially since the brush was a brush in my purse that pre-dated being on this website...so it is not even a gentle brush!!!  :o So, I have put in an order for a horn comb to brush when my hair is full of conditioner.  Will let you know how that goes.  

I don't like the long hair on my currently fat body.  Still, it will take years to grow my hair and only one to lose the weight.  Am now running 4 times a week and am setting up to do weight lifting with 2 colleagues on Tues and Thurs (I run M, W and F with another colleague).  I like this plan becuase I know that at least one of them will want to go each time so there will be no bowing out!!!  So, wihile I think the hair is ok and I love if...but I feel it does not suit me with all this extra fat...I know I will lose the fat far sooner than I can grow classic length hair, so I do not give up.

I currently have a liter of EVOO enfusing with sage and rosemary, and just for fun I added rosemary EO.  Will tell you how it goes when I try it.  Still have a little of my old EVOO to use so it will be a couple of weeks.

Last night I took out some frozen avacado mush to thaw and tomorrow I will set it up for a weekend deep condition.  Can you believe that most of this summer avacados were...$1.89 EACH.  Subsequently I froze the mush when I could get them cheap.  Still, I only have about a 10 week supply frozen!!!  That will not last the winter when the prices really rocket.  Might have to find another good deep moisturizer.

I love my scalp massager and an oil I bought for my scalp.  It seems to be working well.  I strongly believe that if my skin at my scalp is not healthy, my hair cannot grow through the scalp and expect to be healthy.

I still have Pantene at work and when I run at work, I only rinse and condition.  MY hair hates Pantene.  I know many are ok with it, but my hair hates it.  I must dump the pantene and fill the container with the conditioner my hair loves.

Well, I am pooped.  I will read journals this weekend.  Sorry, it is not that I don't care about you all...but the reality is...I will probably only catch up with all your news on weekends.  

Thanx again to you all for your patience.  Take care,

JD

Joeydog! I'm sorry the people at your job are such total idiots... well, some of them anyway. the rest of your wardens seem like they're all good people.. but your security head... Not so bright. maybe you and lisabelle are sharing the canadian idiots? *hugs* to you...

my hair's the same way about being combed.. If i don't use my brush too, it will snarl, look horrible, and even worse, end up more damaged from the tangles and dryness. I don't think all brushing is bad, just rough... If you're cautious, gentle, and take time with it, I honestly can't see why brushing is any worse than combing.

I love your idea of freezing the mushed avacado's as they're typically expensive and it's rare to find them cheaply.  I supposed when I do, I need to be smart and take advantage of that.

I also have a vision of what I want to look like physically once my hair has grown out so I can understand what you mean.  I believe you can do whatever you put your heart into so I wouldn't stress over it too much.  Just continue with your workouts and it'll happen, just try not to be tough on yourself.  Good Luck! :D

K and LD, thank you so much for your support.  To be frank, I had complained so much on those posts I wanted to delete them...but knew others would have read them so there was no point!!

LD, yes, I buy avacodo when it is cheap and mush it up with a bit of lemon and freeze it, just marking on the jar how many avacados are in it so I can adjust my recipes, be they for hair or eating.  Heck, any recipe you use with avacado involves lemon or lime to keep it from going brown!!!

I have started running 4 days a week.  Funny, last year I could not find a soul to run with, but this year I have several.  In fact, they are calling it the "JD" Fitness Club and people email me regularily to see if they can join.  We are up to 10 people running together.  Gee, there is no way with that number of people I will be able to bow out since I am expected to be there.  GOOD THING.

The same is happening with my gym aspirations.  My work gym costs $80 a year (you really cannot beat that!!!) and I plan on starting weights there in Oct (one bad thing about the membership is it is Oct to Oct.  If you join in Sept, it is still $80 for the one month).  I have about 8 people that want to do that with me on the alternate days from running and the funning thing is, only one of the 8 runs with me.  We are going to the gym on Tues to have the newbies check it out.  Do the math, even if 50% decide not to do it by Oct, and 50% bow out after a short time, I still have at least on person that will drill me to get there!!!  I will do weights here at home (have everything here) on the weekend to make the 3rd time of the week.
And I will get belly dancing in somewhere (Lisabelle, ran behind sending the video....my fault, will do tomorrow.)

Personal Note:  ex-hubby is trying to get back in my life.  I am not letting him.

Hair:  Did a scalp treatment on Friday (love those...involves a massage and an essential oil mix which I bought so I cannot tell you how to make it).  Yesterday I did an EVOO infused with rosemary and sage.  Nice.  Need to wash and condition tonight.  Dying for my horn comb as I agree with LD that the combing is great...but not fine enough to take care of all the tangles.  I am hoping that doing it wet with the horn comb and then dry with the wood comb will reduce the need to brush as I now realize, I need to brush, and not with a boars hair brush, every once in a while!!!

The weekend went by so fast.  I have not been on since Thursday night.  I now have to shower and get ready for work tomorrow.  I will try to check some journals while I let my hair dry.

I feel soooo bad.  You are all here for me...and I am not there for you.  

I worry about Room to Grow, have not heard from her for so long.  Guess I had better check her journal tonight for sure.  So many others I think about to.  Night all.

Oh, about the real Joeydog...his fur is good, his ears are up, his eyes are bright, but he could barely walk today.  Dunno if it is just a bad day or if this is the end.  I carried him out to sit by me while I did planting today.  He looked soooo happy sniffing the air and watching the world go by.  A couple of dogs came over to visit and his tail wagged and he sniffed at them with BRIGHT eyes and a happy face.  Even I as an ex vet do not know how I will put him down if he looks so good but just cannot stand.  I have never had to face putting any dog down that still looked good but couldn't cope.  Today...he could not cope.  He could not get up alone and could barely walk when he was up...but he looks so darned happy.  Hopefully it was just a bad day.  All I can say is I was teary the whole time I was planting which took over an hour.  My poor little baby.

JD

*hugs*
I had to go through that with Jack, the first dog I ever owned... Mom got him when I was 8 weeks old(so was he, we shared a birthday!) and we had him for almost 12 years, until his hip dysplasia caught up and started causing pain, and the tumor on his back started affecting his spine... it was at that point, once he started hurting, that we put him down.

I live in fear that the next time I talk to my parents, they'll tell me they had to put Maxx down :( he's another shepherd mix, with the same problem (hip dysplasia) and we made a promise to him, that when he starts hurting bad enough that he can't get up and walk anymore, we'll put him at peace. I don't know how old he is, but he was fully adult, probably 3 or 4, when he showed up at the doorstep when I was 12... I'm 19.5 now... I love that dog to death though, and I wish I had a place for him down here... So I know something of what you're going through with Joey... I pray he feels better and can get up and move again, and I pray that you can deal when it's his time to go(may that be far away). Remember that you've got friends IRL and here that are always willing to be a shoulder to cry on...

*hugs*

Aye, it's a sad thing to watch something that you love deteriorate right in front of your eyes and know that there's nothing you can do to help them.  :(  Can't even tell you how many times I've been there...with cats, dogs, horses, husbands, family members, friends, you name it.

K and Angel, thank you for your support. I am happy to say, it seemed Joey was just having a bad day...but who knows how much time is left.  I know it will not be long...Still, I knew the day I took on ANY of my animals, this day would come.  Does not make it easier, it will break my heart...but life is what it is.

What I am asking for help with is my sister.  Now, for those of you who have not read my journal, my sister is 49, a functional alchoholic and not my favorite person.  Still, I try to get along with her in her drunk episodes (I do it for my folks or I would tell her to ....umm...go away? and since she is drunk 90% of her non-working or sleeping hours, it is a trial) because she is a really nice person when sober.

Usually I go to my folks for help...you will see in a minute why I cannot.

My sister met a guy in an airport a few months ago (she travels a lot with her job) and talked to him for 1 hour.  Since then they have communicated by email and phone.  A couple of months ago he wanted her to meet him in Boston and she set it up so that she was in a different hotel that he did not know where she was.  I told her to tell him I was travelling with her but doing my own thing so that she could tell him she had to report to him.  I told her to call me here in Ottawa no matter what she did.  He cancelled...his bosses would be where he had planned on meeting so it would not be cool.

Well now she is meeting him in New York.  Fine.  Who am I to judge until she told me she was sharing a room with him and DEMANDED that it be a room with 2 beds.  OH PLEASE!!!  I hesitated and, over about 5 minutes, brought up the 'rape' issue.  She said she would have her cell and the rooms were small so she could get to a phone in the room.  Then she went on to tell me if that failed she would get out of the room and go to her car (she plans to drive) but then she said she would leave her car out of town because she is afraid of driving in NY (trust me, this is ALL too true) so she would just get a cab.  

Ok ladies (or men) tell me if this guy decides to rape her he wont account for those things and do it anyway?  Do you think she will get to a phone, much less a cab?

Lets face it, IF she gets raped, she is RECORDED as his guest in HIS room.  The courts will toss it out.  Heck, woman get tossed out of court for rape because they where short skirts and tank tops, much less agreeing to share a room, two beds or not.

BTW, my sister has an undegree in law so should know all this....but the booze and loneliness are making her forget.  I don't know how to get through to her.  It could have been Boston, NY or Timbucktwo...doesn't matter...in my eyes she is setting herself up.

Yes, maybe this guy is ok.  But maybe he is not.  I can't talk to my folks about this because they will freak and worry and there is nothing more that they can do than I can.  Can anyone out there tell me SOMETHING I can say that she might listen to.  And if not...worry not...his name is Rob.  Now it is recorded before hand on the net if something happened even if she asked for it in some ways.  Hell, today we are supposed to believe when a woman says no....it means NO!!!

Even if you all have no ideas....it is recorded before hand that I had worries.  Will it help in court...who knows...I hope I never have to find out.  Yes, she drives me nuts...but her heart is GOLD when she is sober and she is my sister.

JD

What a terrible spot to be in, JD.  Your heart is in the right place, however, she is an adult.  I don't think you can stop her unless you pray really hard that he has to cancel again.

Perhaps there are stories out there on the web that describe this exact situation that would scare her into changing her mind.  Its a yucky tactic, I know you want to keep her from making a terrible mistake.

Can you convince her to stay in a separate room or different hotel?

Even as a functioning alcoholic, her response time to trouble must be slower than if she didn't drink and NO ONE knows how they will react in such a situation.

Sorry I can't be much help.   :-/  Good Luck!

Oh dear, that is just...ugh. I don't think I even have words for how beyond-stupid of a risk your sister is taking. I hope there is some way she changes her mind about staying in the same room as the guy.

I'm sorry I don't have any suggestions about what to do either. I sincerely hope nothing bad happens.

(((hugs)))

((((hugs)))  She's taking a horriable risk.  I agree with Sakina, maybe stories about meetings that have gone wrong might help. :-/

Oh my,  :-[  Let's face it - you share a room with a guy, there is implied consent, regardless of how many beds there are.  I am sure the guy is also assuming that night-time activities are to be expected, since she has agreed to stay in the same room.  If this is their first face to face meeting, it is not the best plan for one.  She will be limited in what actions she can take.  I hope one of the decides to back out before something bad happens.

Hey Folks,

Well, you all affirmed my thoughts.  As for helping her...I got an email at work the morning after I posted that message "suprise trip".  She went that night to Boston (instead of NY to meet him).  Crazy girl.  Anyway, she is home now but won't speak about the trip.  Obviously she is alive...I presume nothing bad happened but it is not like her to not talk.

Hair:  Doing ok.  Still have not worked out a great routine for while I am working (as in for the next 25 years!!).  Did an EVOO infused with sage and rosemary + a scalp condition this weekend.  

Personal life:  What personal life?  House, work and animals are all I have time for.

Sorry to say I am still neglecting people's journals.   Wish I had time.  I just don't right now.  My thoughts are with you all.  Take care,

JD

Hmmm, I hope it's a "everything was so wonderful I want to keep it to myself" kind of quiet because the alternative is too horrible. Still, I really, really hope that nothing bad happened to your sister.

Don't feel bad about neglecting other journals. There's so many that it can get overwhelming once one falls behind. You have a lot of things to do, so just concentrate on taking care of yourself. :)

Thanx for the understanding Juri.  LIfe just runs so fast.  As for sister...she has not spoken to me...just the parents.  She might open up with me...especially if she is sloshed as usual.

I was told my hair was very pretty today.  LOL, I thought it was having a bad day.  I still do so I am going to wash it and condition it.  It seems a bit greasy to me which means it will be very greasy tomorrow and i have no time to wash tomorrow night...electrolysis after work.  

Life is just way to fast and working is overloading me which is frustrating me.  I have a heavier work load than my superiors that make $10 000/year more than me.  Oh and just to be clear, I am not taking into account the simple submisions, just the complicated ones so we are not discussing a difference in difficulty.  My boss and I will be discussing this next week when she returns to work.  This is not the first year I have seen this happen!!!  My attitude is to promote me to thier level or give me the work expected for my level.  Besides that, did anyone notice I have been off work on sick leave for 8 months and could have got a medical certificate saying I could only do the work load of someone a level LOWER than me for the first 6 months...much less one higher than my superiors in 6 months.  

Yes, I  could apply else where and get a job with equal pay and benefits which it seems everyone I know is doing.  Still I cannot see the reason to do it.  My boss is good to me. She cannot help what senior management does.  Also I have no desire to jump from the frying pan into the fire.  If I am not promoted in March I will appeal and I have the grounds to.  There are 6 evaluators to each submission.  One is randomly chosed to lead the 6.  I was randomly chosen as the leader.  The submission was a pilot so it involved a lot of unknown ground and I worked 80 hours a week to make sure it came together due to my unfortunate random position.  All the other 5 evaluators were promoted.  I was not.  Which is more, I can prove that for 3 of me 5 years with the company (the first being a training year and call it one year off) I have done more work than one of my superiors.

Now this all said, I accepted not getting a promotion 2 years ago after the sub I have told you about (well I did until I learned everyone else got a promo) and I did not apply this last year (the period considered for promotion is from March to March) as I was off work from Oct to March due to sick leave...but I resent coming back to a work load that is too heavy for my level...much less my health.

Darn...what is wrong with me.  Somehow I just spent all this time justifying how I will not kill myself to do this...but ended up convincining myself to do the impossible so I am ensured of the promotion.  Damn, why did my folks have to teach me such ambition and work ethic????

News flash, I just ended up with less time to talk to you all.  Damn me!!!  This is the only promotion I want in my life (since from here I would leave science and go to politics---shiver) but if I am doing the work, why shouldn't I get the pay???

JD

You're welcome. As for your sis, I hope she has...um, news.

I'm sorry to hear about all the crap you have to put up with at work. I would have been seriously pissed if I were in your shoes and had been passed over for a promotion despite putting in 80 hours a week. I hope things end up working out in the end.

(((hugs)))

Again, thanx Juri.  I still haven't spoken to my sister.  That is because if I do, I have to have 2 hours to give her.  She talks a lot when she is drunk...which is all non-working or sleeping hours.  Sigh.  Don't think me mean. I tried to help her.  Me ex was a recovering alcoholic and even he gave up on her after time.  In AA they say 'never say never about a drunk quitting".  He figures never.   Sad..but I cannot change it.

Work:  well, I decided to speak with a colleague who is a level higher than me but a cool guy.  I just needed to vent.  Now he is not in my section (there are 4 toxicology sections) so I figured I was safe.  Gawd.  It turns out he just became an Acting Section Head...which means...well, I spoke of my superiors in the last email...but like me they are evaluation officers...the next step up is a Section Head who oversees the work of all the evaluators.  An Acting Section Head is someone who fills in for a section head because they are away of...say French training (important here in Canada) or maternity or whatever.  So, while this guy is not my boss, he is her equivalent...and I thought I was just talking to a fellow worker who is cool and experienced.  

So, I tell him my woes and he says "As an Acting Section Head..." and my head goes down on the desk and I go "Oh God, I didn't know that!!!!  Oh man!!".  Now I said he was cool.  He just laughed, patted me on the head and said "Relax, nobody could do all that work!!!  But as an Acting Section Head, I can help you."  

Now let me try to explain something else on the short.  I said there are 4 groups of toxicologists.  2 of us review and evaluate new pesticides.  2 evaluate and review old pesticides (the idea being that because our knowledge grows and so our demands become higher, we can relook at older pesticides based on new knowledge in the science field and our goal...but this has only been going on for about 7-10 years...is to re-review all chemicals every 5 years).  Now please understand, I have really over simplified this to keep it short.  Trust me, this is all great for the environment and for our citizens.

Anyway, I am in the area of reviewing and assessing new pesticided as is the colleague I spoke with.  Anyway, he is Acting Section Head for a re-eval area.  He told me that he felt that the re-eval could use learning to document more and that his group had no deadlines as tight as mine so he would offer his whole section (5 evaluators) to help me and he would teach them how to do it the way we do!!!  In other words, he will help me AND improve our system.   I love this guy!!!  He is just too cool.  And smart....gawd I wish I was as smart.  Now I should say this...this does not mean that all of re-eval does not document as well as us.  The second re-eval folks have over 10 years of experience (each person) doing what I do before they went into re-eval.  They are amazing.  It is just that my colleagues section is made of fairly new people who did not do the original reviews.  I should also point out that my colleague is very picky an he is acting for a woman who did what I did for 20 years before the re-eval area was born.    What I am saying...the reviews are all good, just the documentation could be better.

Hair:  I am feeling icky about it but not a surprise I guess.  I have a chest cold...you know...the type where your chest hurts when you breath, lie down, use any energy, etc.  I know I sound like I am sick all the time but remember, I was away from people for 8 months due to my mental health and my immune system is low.  It will get back up there.  Just give it time...an no, I am not taking time off.  I have warned people to stay away from me so I hope not to spread it especially since for the next two weeks only one of the 6 cubicles that surrounds me has anyone in it.  And that is occupied by Mike.  I should tell you all about Mike one day.  He is like the class clown.  He is fun to have next to me.

LOL, he stresses about nothing but I stress about everything.  We have been office mates for 5 years.  I watched him move in with his girl and marry her.  No stress for him.  Work never stresses him.  BUT he was terrified about having a kid.  He wanted one...was just really scared. His wife wanted a pug and he asked me one day to help him find a good pug.  So I started doing that with him but being an ex-vet I asked a lot of questions and discovered he hoped getting a pug would slow his wife down on the idea of a kid.  WhenI realized this, with him sitting next to me, I started to LAUGH.  I mean I laughed so hard everyone in my area heard.  They all asked me what was so funny and I told them I would tell them one day..but not today.  I then turned to Mike and told him "Hon, you are having a baby and getting a pug!!!  Except it!!!"

He has a 3 month old daugher, still no pug.  LOL.  A month ago he and his wife asked me to look into a good pug for them to get.  Today Mike came and told me his wife wants a second child as soon as possible.  I had my hands on the keyboard looking for a pug and stopped and said "Pug or not?"  He said l "Do you think if she gets the pug..."  I started typing again and said "Sooner or later you will have 2 kids and a pug."  He said "Ya, I guess".  Now don't take that wrong, he LOVES the kid and dogs.   He asked me if I thought, well you get it    So cute.  Jealous.  But he makes me smile.  I like to smile.  No, no interest, he is like a kid brother to me.  

You're welcome, Joeydog I don't have any sibs so I can only imagine what a pain it would be to have a sister like that. I don't think you're mean at all.

Glad you're going to get some help at work! Oh, pugs. They're so weirdly cute, but the shedding is something else.

Well, a pug would not be my choice...but the woman wants what she wants!!!

Hair:  thought it was doing okay.  I woke up at 2 am last night (morning) and could not get back to sleep so at 2:45 I got up and did the 30 minutes of animal chores.  That left me free until 4:00 to do anything with regard to getting ready for work (did some house cleaning inbetween).  At 4 I went and washed my face, brushed my teeth, moisturized my face and then I let my hair down from my satin sox....OMG, hair was SOOO greasy.  Into the shower I went!!

I think this is what happened.  I mentioned before I love the Body Shop cocoa butter.  Well, I was running out and I called to check on getting some (I have to drive 100 km out of my way for it!!) and was stunned to find that it was now $22 for 6.0 oz!!!  Heck, when I started buying it 2 years ago it was $14!!!.  So, as you all know, I am not doing great financially for now...I had to bow out and turned to what I had in my own house.  Well, I had pure cocoa butter and 28 000 IU vitamin E, so I combined the two and found it better (and cheaper) than the Body Shop stuff I love so much!!! Now the problem is that is is kinda greasy (but the skin takes it in within 5 minutes and smells so great....umm chocolate cravings).  I think that last night I moisturized and immediately combed my hair (during that ritual I tend to run my free hand down my hair after I comb...don't ask me why) and then I spent the time gathering it between my two hands into a pony tail to put on the satin sox.  In short, I think I over greased my hair by accident!!!!!  Lesson learned!!!

About the Body Shop.  It was bought by a new company recently (I think Lauriel?).  I loved their cream (and it has not changed) but I refuse to pay that much money for a body cream when I have found a combination that works just as well for less!!!!!  I also love the cocoa butter body wash...but it has gone up way too much too.  Just not sure how to compensate for that.  ALSO, because I do not have a man in my life to rub cream into the skin on my back, I loved the coconut oil spray that I could just spray on my back...which is discontinued.   I guess I am back to my boycott of the Body Shop though.

You wonder why I boycotted it?  Very fair question.  Remember what I do for a living.  Anything that touches a human MUST be tested and approved by the gov't (well at least in the 'civilized' world).  That means the pesticides I do, the prescription drugs I used to do, the house house cleaners you use, the foods you eat...I mean everything.  Body Shop made me mad because they said they did not test on animals.  That was true...but only because they used things OTHER companies had had tested on animals and then approved by the gov't.  

Now, don't get me wrong...I love that they did not create new things that had to be tested and kill animals...I mean...how many animals have to die before we figure out a good moisturizer or cleaner or whatever!!  Understand that while my job does involve companies sacrficing animals...I want no more sacrifice than is REQUIRED.  There are GREAT cosmetic things out there...no more animals need to be sacrificed.  But the Body Shop implied that the ingredients in their recipes for poos, conditioners, etc, had never been animal tested, while the truth was...all the ingredients had been tested previously...at another companies expense!!  True,THEY did not animal test.  It made me mad.  If you aren't following...how would you like to use a moisturizer all over your body that might be a carcinogen, cause reproductive problems, liver failure, etc...in order to save about 100 (in total) rats, mice  and bunnies..and I hate to admit it...about 20 dogs.  Believe me...I would save them all if I could...but then we would all die.  That is reality.

Anyway, Body Shop was the first and now every where does it so I stopped boycotting them...but now I think I am boycotting them for the prices they are charging!!!  Heck, an almost 100% increase in 2 years!!!  Figured out my moisturizer...guess I will have to find another body shampoo though!!  No ideas...anyone got one?

JD

The Body Shop does WHAT?! That sucks. The claims about no animal testing seem a bit underhanded now. I have to wonder about my own supposedly "cruelty-free" shampoo and conditioner (not from the Body Shop).

Not sure about the body shampoo. Have you heard of Chagrin Valley Soap? They don't make body shampoo, but I've heard that their bar soaps are really moisturizing and you can order sample bars for about $2 each. I was thinking of ordering some from them after my *sigh* Body Shop lavender body wash runs out. However, if you have hard water, there's a chance the bars will feel wonky on your skin.

I use to use Body Shop, but they got really exspensive.  Eww they got bought by Loreal?  Well the owner of Body Shop just died so that answers that eh?  I've been to Loreal head office and found that they have lots of brands under there belt and it's all the same stuff just in different packages.  :P

Lisabelle,

Yes, I believe it was Loreal (and I am so ashamed I spelt it so incorrectly last night...I thought of that while I was brushing my teeth at 4 am but did not have time to fix it before I went to work!!).

Juri,

A lot of companies make this claim now...but if you live in Canada, the EU, Australia or the US (and probably many other places but those I know for sure) the law REQUIRES that the ingredients in a product that touches a human are tested on animals.  Now let me try to explain how companies get away with not testing on animals.

Lets talk...eye liner to make it easy.  Now, eyeliner can get into your eyes and anything you put on your skin can be absorbed into your system.  Going into your eyes, IF it is not safe, could cause a lot of problems.  Think putting ammonia in your eyes!!!  Not good.  Will damage your eyes.  Equally, the skin absorbes things and gets it into your blood and causes trouble.  I am trying to think of an example that everyone would know...but I can't because they are pretty regulated.  

Now of course, we would all say that we would rather a bunny (which is what is used for eye tests since they are closest to humans with regards to eyes) be tested on rather than us being the .. well...guinea pigs (which are used for some tests).  But you see, eyeliner is common and we have tested it for years on bunnies so why does any company need to come up with new formulations that need to be tested?  

Now, I now work with pesticides so we talk about technical grade actives (TGAI's) and formulants which in presciptions meds is medicinal or non-medicinal ingredients.  An example of a formulant or a non-medicinal ingredient is water.  So, my point is, for these formulants or non-medicinal ingredients...there is no need for further animal testing (because water is just the simplest example...but look on your labels...it is always there in makeup or hair products).  We know these are safe.  It is the TGAI or medicinal ingredient we worry about.  I am not sure what the techinical term would be for makeup, hair or body stuff...but you are getting the idea.  Anyway, to really simplify this, we only worry about a new chemical in products that is not previously investigated (but that is really simplifying because think of mixing bleach and laundry detergent together (both not too harmful) and the problems that arise with fumes, inluding death...so sometimes we do have to look at formulants mixes with actives so I am really simplifying here).

BUT, my point is, while medications and pesticides have to be checked all the time because we are always looking for better cures for..cancer, diabetes...etc or trying to find a way to keep crops healthy and fruitful (no, I do not agree with pesticides for cosmetic reasons) so we all have food...with the thousands of types of proven cosmetic out there...why do we need to sacrifice any more animals for woman's vanity!!!!!!

The Body Shop was honest.  I will give them that.  THEY did not test what their products because other companies had paid to test the 'formulants or non medicinal' ingredients they use.  10 years ago it made me angry they made this claim, because everything in their products HAS been tested on animals...just not by them.  I stopped boycotting them because everyone started using this claim...but none have ever admitted that what they use was once tested on animals...but on the other hand...while these companies are wording things to infer that testing was NEVER done on animals...I am sure as heck not going to a company that is still testing on animals when there is more than enough info for cosmetics already.  

So, I think it is great that companies are not testing on animals anymore, but I hate when they infer that no animal testing has ever been done of the ingredients.  In fact, if I hit a company that could honestly tell me that the ingredients in their cosmetics have NEVER been on animals...I would run as fast as I could...and I would with a company that is still testing today.

Juri, stick with what you are doing...but remember that they are sorta decieving you since the ingredients should have been tested on animals at some point!!

So, if you all like that...lets talk 'organic food' tomorrow if you are interested.  You might be shocked.  I will need to do a touch of homework but I could still write paragraphs on that.  Let me give a lead into it to see if you are all interested.  All of us have done science in school, whether we were interested or not (which you can tell I was and many others here are too I know) but the basic lesson in like grade 7 science was organic = anything that contains carbon.  Do you really think that adding a pesticide to the mix takes all the carbon out of a veggie, a crop or animal?  Oh please!!!  I can't figure why they used the term 'organic' except to tantilize people since it is organic with or without the pesticide!!!  Talk about using wording to suck people in.

And to really tantilize you...remember a few years ago (well in North America) low fat had to be defined by the gov't because everyone was saying their things were low fat...but only compared to the orginal as opposed to a strict set standard for what was considered low fat (later set by the gov'ts)?  Yup, you guessed it...same with organic...pesticides MIGHT still be being used on you 'organic' food but at much lower doses!!


Leave you with that...

JD

Wow, thanks so much for explaining that, JD! It was quite interesting to read. I guess I feel a bit better about my hair products, but still a little sad for the animals (though I do realize that animal testing is needed for other things).

I think I remember hearing about the term "organic" doesn't automatically mean pesticide-free. I wouldn't mind reading a bit more about that--but only if you have time. I know you're really busy so don't feel like you need to write a huge, long thing about it.

Juri,

Feel good about using cosmetics (face, hair and moistusers) that are not tested on animals.  There is NO NEED for us to test those things anymore...there are more than enough on the market that are tested!!!!

I have not had time to check into the stats on organic stuff.  I will soon though.  I did a whole input on my journal about health food places...so I will not repeat it...but 'organic' falls under the same heading...which means...you cannot be sure about what you are buying.  ALWAYS look for a DIN number on vitamin supplements.  ALWAYS check with your pharmacist about using natural products if you are on meds.  Example:  Acutane is a med commonly used to prevent  acne.  The presciption is VERY high in Vit A.  You can go into a health store and get tea, supplements, etc that have Vitamin A in them....which would have caused on overdose in a natural thing...vit A...and could kill someone.  Most people that work in a health food store have a high school education or less.  They are not qualified to tell you if a natural product will interact with any medications you are on.  A phamacist can.  Always check with your phamacist before you put a natural product into your mix.  Remember....Penicillin comes from mold and is, therefore, natural.  Look at all the problems it can cause.  

Anyway...been awake for over 24 hours...need to sleep.

Before I go ..hair:  my psoriasis is bugging me so I will be doing the oily treatment and the harsh poo all weekend.  Yuk.  I am going to do a deep condition treatment later today (Curly 64 recipe) before I wash the crap for the psorasis treatment  Take care all.

JD

Don't worry about getting info about organic stuff or feel like you have to get it in the near future. If you have time, great! If you find that you can't get around to it, that's totally fine too! I don't want you to feel pressured or anything about this.

I'll definitely have to do a search for your entry on health food stores. It sounds like something I'd want to read. And thanks for the info you wrote in Sept. 30th's entry!

Well, turns out I have pneumonia.  Not contagious so I can continue to go to work...as I have no leave...but such is the case for most of the world...not having leave I mean.  Obviously that will take all my energy soooo for yet another week, I will not be able to check the journals of my friends...been so long, I do not even get notifications anymore!  Feel terrible about that.  Gawd I am going to have  alot of reading!!!  I do care and want to read...thank God it is a long weekend in Canada next weekend.

Have I mentioned I have the best folks in the world????  When I first became ill and hit financial obligations...they covered me...and told meif I have not paid it back by the time they die...I owe my siblings!!!  I'snt that cool?  Have this rotten feeling I will owe my siblings.  Would rather pay folks to they can travel...but life is what it is and the folks are just tooooooo cool.

Sooo, when I told them I was sick and going to the doc today...they grouped together (yea, I am fortunate because they are still together) .  They showed up at 9 am (I had  to leave for doc at 10 am) with soup and meals for me AND...get this Dad was taking me to the doc while mum did my house cleaning!!!  Now, I have kept up with bathrooms, kitchens, dusting, vacuuming and that sort  of thing, but while dad and I were out mum cleaned widows, window sills, marks on walls, floor boards and stuff like that.  Some of you fortunate types might have folks like that...but even if you are that fortunate..I think we have the BEST PARENTS IN THE WORLD!!!!  I have ALWAYS said my folks are the best.  They have helped all three of us through hard times (emontionally and financially) plus they do a lot of extras like this.  They are great folks!!!!  Remember as I tell you what they did for me today, they are both in their 70's.  I challenge anyone to tell me they are not great folks and what we (should we have kids) aspire to be!!!!  Some folks cannot afford the moeny...and make no mistake, my folks are not rich but get buy...but even the poorist of folks...for them to give the time to clean my house and take me to the doc at their age...isn't that just tooooooo cool?  That they can and will afford to help me financially is GREAT...but I now I am fortunate that way.  But they give their time and effort too.


One lucky gal.  Too bad my drunkered sister doesn't get it.

Hair:  Well, having been sick...it is not doing great.  I  kept up with the psoriasis yuchy oil treatment longer than I would have had I been going to work.  Psoriasis...well...doing ok.  Hair always loves the oily treatment involved with the psoriasis...still have to check what the oily vehicle is for the med since my hair seems to love it.  Let me tell you though....it means a SERIOUS commercial poo after using!!!!

Skin:  Well, the psoriasis on my skin was doing ok until I got a big itch and caused a scap on my leg (BAD BAD GIRL since I scratched).    The medication is good but I have found that my 50/50 mix of cocoa butter/vitamin E was GREAT for it...but I ran out of cocao butter.  See, here in Canada, 7 0z of pure cocoa butter costs about $14.  I am shipping in 5 lbs of pure cocoa butter plus 14 bars of cocoa butter wash bars for about $70...(ya, you can see the savings) that will be in by Friday...but my skin is complaining until then.  Do any of you know where I can get 28 000 IU vitamin E cheap?

That is all I have to say.  Life is good...expept that I am single and not expecting a baby...LOL...but that is not a surprise.  LAUGH...IT WAS A JOKE!!!  Ok..sorta joke...wish I was but not surprising  anyone, including me down, because I am not!!!  Sigh. Laugh with me folks...I need to laugh that I do not have a child at my age.

Hope to get to your journals on the long weekend ( next weekend is Thanksgiving for Canada)...but cannot promise.  Doing Dad's 76th B-day on Friday and Thanksgiving on Saturday...here at my house next weekend.  So long weekend might fly by.  Miss you all.  REALLY not ignoring you....just sooooo busy and sick because my immune system  is down.

JD

JD,I hope you feel better soon,girl!!!  Take care of yourself!!!

I'm sorry to hear you're sick! I hope you get better soon!!!

Yep, I think your parents are super cool!

Get well soon! :)

Hope you are feeling better soon.  Sounds like you have wonderful parents - you are very fortunate.

Feel better soon!   :)

Feel better soon, JD. I can only imagine what a pneumonia would add to your busy lifestyle.  :P

You are lucky to have such supportive parents.

MY BOSS IS THE BEST.  I think I have mentioned that before.    She got back to work today (after an WHO meeting got the past 2 weeks).  She was horrified to hear that she had accidentally given me more work than my superiors would have (and she really did not know as I suspected because one of my superiors did not do their job...well...period). We talked and she saw I was..ummm screwed...and so she was pleased to hear I had pulled in help while she was gone.  BUT...get this...

She is offering to give me 2 days a week work at home...which means I work 10 hours those 2 days...but that is work time instead of driving (2 hours over my 8.5 normal hours plus I can do it in PJ's!!!)  PLUS...for the 1.5 hours I get for working extra...I get 1.5 times for over time...which gives me leave I do not have right now after being sick!!! AND  she is willing to pay me for work over what I should on weekend...since the gov't has given me too much work..  That means..if I work 8 hours  to 16 hours on the weekend...I get 8 to 16 hours off work if I am not well since I have worked it on weekends.  In short...I work to get time off...but my boss is giving me that option... DONE in my world.  Told you she was great.  Now...she has to appeal for it...so while she is offering it...it it not for sure.  It is looking good though.  

Hair:  doing okay seeing as I have pneumonia...hair and skin always show when we are sick!!  The horn comb is great in combination with the wood comb but I still find I need to brush with a good penetrating boar comb about once a week though...to get all the knots out.


Sorry, I feel bad I have no time right now (between work and trying to get back to work after all these months) for other people's journals.  I have resolved that if I cannot rectify that by the New Year...I will quite writing...Not fair to ask all of you to listen when I am not doing the same.  Until then, I hope you all understand...I am going though an adjustment phase...but if it goes longer...i will sign off as it is not fair to you all.  Fair is fair.

JD

Your boss is doing the right thing.  By making accommodations for you, it creates a win-win situation.  It is easier for you to get the job done, and they GET THE JOB DONE!  It also means they don't have to hire and train someone new which saves them a ton!  Not knowing the specifics of your medical leave, they may be legally obligated to make accommodations for you.  Many employers try to ignore those requirements in hope that the employee doesn't know they can request/demand it.  But even if the adjustments are not mandated, it is nice that your situation has been recognized and they are doing the right thing to help you out.  I hope things continue to go well for you.

Wow you do have a great boss!  I wish when I was working that I had such a nice one.  My last job was horrid.  In seven years I never called in sick, then, when I was really sick and called in twice they got really mad.  This was with the new boss or shall I say cow! >:(  I am happy to see that someone is not getting screwed by the system! :)

I'm sorry you've been sick, JD...*hug*... also, there's no need to quit writing just because you're not reading anybody elses' journals... I for one will still read, to catch up on how you're doing. BTW, you do have great folks.

That's a great boss! I hope the appeal goes through!!

I'm with Kiraela. While I understand your feelings, I hope you'll keep posting. I enjoy your entries and I'm sure many of us would miss them (and you!) if you stopped writing.

JD-i've been busy and not on the boards... but now i am, and catching up on your journal. hope you are feeling better soon! sounds like you have a good boss, which i'm sure helps a lot. thinking of you!

So much support from so many people.  It really is like having a second family coming here.  Thank you all.

Well, so much has happened, so for today I will just tell you about last weekend.  For all of you that have read my journal you know I have a little white, declawed, diabetic, deaf, 14 year old kitty that loves EVERYONE and EVERYTHING!!

Well...about 2 hours after I gave him his insulin (have to give it to him every 12 hours) on Sun evening...he got outside..in the boonies with foxes, wolves, coyotes and the whole 9 yards out there to prey on him.  I saw him go and went after him at 9 pm on Sunday night.  BIG storms came through that night (I mean trees fell, etc) and I hunted for him and I sat in the garage with all the doors open for him to come home.  I stayed up all night.  At 9 am on Monday (it was a long weekend) I started to knock on the doors of my neighbours to ask if they had seen him and if had permission to check their propeperty.  Before I knew it (God love my neihbours) they were out and had sent their kids on a mission to find my little Adam.  By noon we had all given up.  I knew that even if a predator had not get him...the lack of insulin was counting his time.  Finally at 3 pm on Monday I called of the search.  I told the wonderful neighbours there was no point anymore.

My parents had wanted to come all day to help but I did not want to stress them so I said "no, it is clear it is over".  My mom wanted to at least find his little body so I would know what had happened to him (which I must admit was bothering me).  I realized that Mum loves the little baby rat sooo much, she needed closure too so I said ok.  
Again I searched the same places with my parents...crying...feeling responsible..etc.  Anyway, at 6 pm on Monday my parents gave in as I had.  

As they were driving out of the driveway (oh,my family tradition is we wave good-bye so I was standing outside, crying and waving goodbye to them) when my mum flew out of the car and yelled "White Cat!!!! while pointing in a particular direction.  Well, I can tell you I can still run if I have too!!  oK, i can't run just to do it...but I CAN run when there is a reason.  I ran a huge distance in about 30 s.   I mean..out hear the lots are each 2 acres and I did 4 times that in no time!!!  The cat was so far away I could not tell anything but that it was a white cat.  Well, I can't yell for a deaf cat so I just had to keep running.  It WAS Adam and when he saw me (when I was about 20 feet from him) he started running for me. It was like a movie scene where the guy and the girl run into each others arms in slow motion.  At least, that is what it felt like to me.  And boy did he purr when I picked him up.

I ran home with him, put him down in front of food and gave him his life line of insulin (amazing he survived his own life not to mention predators plus it was the coolest night we have had all year).  He has a good cold but I am dealing with that and he is even more cuddley than usual and he is always cuddley.

As you can imagine, I had been up since 4 am the day he disappeared and he did not reappear until 6 pm the next day all the while I searched for his little tiny sweet soul...I was BEAT!!!  I had nothing done in the house that I should have and I was BEAT.  I just crashed. I only got up about 12 am to put the dogs out because they really need that!!!  And then up at 4 am to go to work.

Adam has a nasty cold from his adventure and I am having to hit him with Notravin (which I hate, much less him) twice a day because a cat that cannot smell will not eat and a diabetic that cannot eat and subsequently have insulin...dies.   He is eating and stuff and right now he is sleeping on me knee.  He needs a full strip down his lower back shaving due to burrs and mud...but he is ok.   Gawd these babies can stress us right out.

The rest of the week:  worry about Adam, hand and knee cleaning of floors, washing floor boards, cleaning windows and all that kind of fall work before I start working 80 hours a week.

Thank you all for being willing to read my journal when I cannot find the time to read yours.  Factually, it looks like it will be March before I can...but I will try to address one of you regulars each week...but when the overtime is done...I will do much better.

Thank you all for being here.

JD

OH, HAIR:  most important on this site!!!  I have not washed since Monday.  I did a rinse and condition on Wednesday.  The psoriasis is itching so I am doing that awful treatment tonight.  Tomorrow I plan an EVOO while I do a facial mask (if I have time), after I do groceries and have the folks over.

Would like to wash and do something on Sunday too.  Hey folks...with my life as it is...it means if I do an EVOO or a deep condition with cocnut oil  each over the weekend (one each night).  I tend to feel I should do both of the aforementioned treatments over the weekend.  Is that bad?  

JD

Oh thank the lord you cat is okay!  I was reading and reading thinking oh no...  I hope he gets over his cold soon and you get some rest! :)

What a scarry thing, to have a fur baby go missing.  I'm so glad you found him safe and sound.  I hope he gets better from his cold quickly.

I do not have psoraisis, but I get a really itchy scalp.  I think its seborric dermatitus (I know, its totally spelled wrong) and I've just started doing cider vinegar rinses after every wash.  Its not drying me out, but I can go the whole day without scratching my scalp bloody!!  Good Luck with your yucky shampoo stuff.

Lisabelle and Sakina, thank you for your thoughts about my little Adam.  I am so happy he is home.  In fact, while I have been so swamped and busy for several days and am pooped, when he woke my up at 1 am today because he had fallen asleep around my head and was sliding down the satin pillow in his sleep (to the point where his whole body was across my face...hence me waking up) I lay there listening to him snore and appreciating him for ages..after which I could not get back to sleep so I have ended up since then!!!  I got up at 3 am when I could stand it no longer.  I left for work at 5:30 am, got home at 4:30 pm and then did house cleaning until about 10:20 pm.  The good news, I have my house clean and can spend tomorrow doing groceries and fall house shut down and have Sunday ALL to me....except caring for the babies (animals that is).

My week...work, cleaning, doctors appointments. That is the boring part...here is the short version of the freaking part.  My ex husband decided to sue me for custody of MY dogs (note, not cats of which I have 3) based on abuse and neglect on my part.  You know, murderers and stuff get months to years to set themselves up with lawyers and stuff.  I got told at 8 pm on Monday night that I was in court about it on Tuesday morning.  To put it simply, being an ex vet and having had the same vet (who was my teacher and my boss in the past) for my dogs for the past 15 years, and a wonder boss who(when she I phoned her at home to tell her I could not be in the next day) phoned my vet and asked her to accumulate the days I had brought the REAL Joey dog in for siezures, Adam for his diabetes, etc and that she would look up the work days I had taken off for my animals, plus the fact that the cops came in and saw the litters clean, the poop scooped and Joey in his wheel chair....it was thrown out of court.  Bugger of an ex to think he could pull that crap.  Who did he think he was!!!  I wont even mention the friends who showed up at court because they have been to my home and seen me with my babies.  I didn't tell my friends or my family about the court date...thought it better to keep it to facts...but my boss IS a friend and called on my in work friends who sent out the word.  My family did not find out until it was over.  I thought them showing up saying I was great with my pets wouldn't help me...of course they would help me.  I told the family once it was all over since it was a 24 hour blitz!!

Yes Ladies and Gents, I did tell the cops and the court that I wanted NOTHING more to do with my ex.  His stuff is out of my house (it was always MY house) and any debts owed were from him to me.  That chapter is sooooo closed.  The pets and I were a family for 9 years before he showed up!!!  Screw his debts to me...I want him GONE.  And so it is.

So as you can see, when Adam woke me up in his sleep this morning, it was so precious I had to let it happen and enjoy the moment of him being so trusting that he just slipped down the pillow across my face.

Oh, about Joey and the wheel chair.  I think for the most part, doggie wheel chairs are bad.  I have a high (sp?) ranch which means there are (in my case) 7 stairs to the basement and 7 stairs to the main floor from his outdoor activities.  He used to come downstairs when I fed the kitties and cleaned the litter...which is ALL I do down there...sigh, I miss him coming down, watching me and following me in anticipation of me going upstairs to feed him after.  As for going upstairs, he manages but he waits for me to support his butt because he has fallen and fears it.  On the main floor where I live he is okay on his own.  I only use the wheel chair to take him for little walks so he is happy and not bored. In the summer time he has been happy to just slowly wander the 2 acre lot I have (no wheel chair) with me following him...but in the winter the snow will be to deep and he cannot wander on my land....so I am training him to walk with the wheel chair on the road because if he gets too tired, he is awfully heavy to carry  all the way home!!!  You know, he always wants to go further...but he just can't.

Hair:  doing well.  I need to record my length on measure up (23 inches but getting a trim next week).  Tonight I have done my psoriasis treatment on the scalp and jojoba on the ends.  Tomorrow I am going to do olive oil infused with rosemary.  Oh ya..must come on tomorrow to tell you all about the GREAT horn combs I have purchased and the GREAT service I got!!!

Take care all,

JD

Awwwww!! Adam is so cute!  I love those sweet moments!  It reminds me of when my bunny falls asleep on my chest.  He just falls over slowly, has his head against my neck and tickle me with his wiskers!! :D

JD, I'm sorry your ex is such a complete and utter arse... *hug* as long as you and your animals are still a family, you'll be fine, I'm sure. You've also got plenty of friends in the real world, and here online that love you and are here for you.

Hey K and Lisabelle,

Thank you for your support.  The 'kids' and I are fine and this week has been wonderfully quiet.

I have been very busy with cleaning and caring for the house and work.  No time for much else but my babies.

Hair:  It seems healthy.  It is 23 inches long now.  I cannot remember if I put that on measure up or not or how long it was last month.  I will have to check.  I do know I have a trim next week so the 23 inches is probably going to be wrong once that is done.

A few months ago I ordered bun covers from Lady MacSnood and she made them smaller because of my fine shorter hair.  I tried one today and it was too small!!  I guess this is a good thing.  I will contact her in a few days (when I have the time) to get more.

I had wanted to oil my ends tonight and put the bun cover on in the morning to cover anything that might be greasy (I am still a terrible judge of how much to use!!!).  I guess I will try the snood next (thanx again chum).  I am SURE that will still fit.

I miss reading all your jounals.  I thought I would have time on the weekend, but the weather was so nice I did my fall shut down, the windows I hadn't done before, cleaned my car and cleaned out the garage and presto...the weekend was gone after fitting in laundry, ironing and house cleaning!!!

I promise that in Feb/March, when I am done the overtime, I will spend hours checking you all out...and thank you to those of you who still read even though I am neglecting you!!!

JD

Don't worry about it, hon... we all have our lives to live. I hope things continue to work out well for you.   pet the kids for me, kay?

Ok folks, help me out.  This week is the beginning of my OT.  I get up at 4 am from Monday to Friday.  On these days I take care of the animals, put on make up and get my stuff together and then I leave for work at 5:15.  I work until 3 pm and come home, arriving back at 4:15.  I look after than animals (feeding, poop scooping, kitty litter and such) until 4:45.  I then cook dinner and spend an hour cleaning the house.  Then I work on my home computer until 8 pm at which point I go to bed (that gives me 8 hours to sleep).  

Friday at 2 am I woke up to the real Joeydog crying. I thought he needed to go out. He could not get up.  I had to carry him outside, hold him while he did his thing and then carry him back up the stairs.  I started working at home on the work supplied computer at 3 am.  I put him up on the bed with me.  He needs a medication that I have not used before because it would compromise his already compromised liver and kideys.  At this point it is the lesser of two evils.  I put him to sleep (known as a PTS in my world) for the pain now  or I give him 2-4 more good months with meds that will take away the pain but will kill his aforementioned organs after that time period.  I put in a call to my vet asking them to advise me and supply the meds.  I worked through until 4 pm with no call from the vet.  I called the vet office at 3:55 before they closed at 4 and was assured the vet would call me.  Well, it is 3:30 am Saturday night...or Sunday morning and no word yet.

Sat morning (this morning for me), I got up at 6 am (alarm and all) and did house cleaning, then left the house at 7:45 and drove to the grocery store and did groceries, then I went and had my hair trimmed and colored (and while I waited for my hair to 'cook' I took my work laptop in and did work for an hour.  Then I went for lunch with the folks as my cousin (remember, from England and working in the US for 3 months) was up.   Cousin wanted him and I to go out alone tonight so I flew home, cooked up 24 meals, washed the dog bedding and my bedding, did the ironing and set out 3 hours from the time I got home.  Cousin and I went into the city (60 minute drive) did a site seeing tour, had dinner and I got home at 10:30 pm at which point I folded laundry, packed and froze the 24 meals I made, finished up the ironing, vaccumed the house, cleaned my kitchen, had a quick shower and now, here I am at 3:30 am.

So, what do I want help with?  Well, when I spoke with my boss on Friday at 4 I questioned my vet not getting back to me.  She said that the vet had not because my vet "had a life".  These words have haunted me since she said them.  I mean, when the alarm went off at 6 this morning...that was all I could think about...other than the fact the night went by too fast.  Does she mean I am too demanding or that I don't have a life because I am too busy trying to be...perhaps perfect?  Or does she mean both?  Ugh.  I honestly don't know how people fit everything in.  I just can't and yet all my friends tell me I must have an invisible twin in my life since I do 2 peoples work in a day.  Am I totally screwed up?  Why can't I run my house, my work and my animals and have any time left over for a life?  What am I doing wrong here?

Well, 3:43 am and I have to sleep now.  Alarm set for 7 am so I can get tomorrow's jobs done before I start the week again.

Oh, go figure, still neglecting all your journals.  Done it so long, I don't even get emails telling me you have posted something.  How pathetic is that!!!

JD

I'm sorry the real Joeydog is not doing well.  In high school I was faced with a similar situation w/our dog, Mandy.  We were out of school (my sister and me) and mom was at work.  I know Mandy was suffering and we were on the verge of taking her in to PTS.  I really didn't want to make that call and so I got my sister, we held hands and I prayed that if it was for her highest and best good that God take her so we wouldn't have to feel guilty about PTS.  After the prayer, I layed down to nap being emotionally exhausted and then there was a thump against my bedroom door.  She had been sleeping in the hall when she couldn't move much.  She was laying up against my bedroom door.
God took Mandy in less than an hour of my prayer.  Even now as I type this I'm crying from grattitude, and that was 20 years ago.

Maybe ask your boss to clarify what she ment.  People who fit everything in have maids and buttlers.  The rest of us simply don't get it all done.  If we were sitting at your table having a cuppa, I'd ask you if you are working so hard in your daily life to avoid feeling.  Something.  Anything.  I don't know, but you might just be distracting your self from your feelings.  Maybe this is just who you are.  However, her comments hit a nerve and that usually means something is there, you may not be aware of it yet.

I agree with Sakina. If your boss' comment is bothering you that much, it might be a good idea to ask her to clarify. I remember when my dad died and a whole bunch of other crap was going on at the same time, I threw myself into my school work so I couldn't have to think about all the bad stuff in my life. I'm not saying that must be what you're doing, but there's a chance.

I'm sorry to hear about the real Joeydog. I hope the vet has called you back by now. I know no matter what course of action you'll ultimately take with him, the decision will be a hard one to make. Lots of hugs to you and the real JD.

Hey folks,

Been about a week since I was last on.  Too busy.  I hate it.  I work 60 hours a week, drive 10 hours a week and then life begins.  Life for me right now involves physio (45 minute drive each way and then physio for an hour) since I have ripped all the tendons in my leggs.   So much for running to lose the weight!!!  The real Joey (again 45 minutes driving each way) is in a chiropractic thing once a week.  Add into that my weekly appointments with the hospital or my doc and of course it is dentist time.  Then you add in my family and animals.  I am beat.

Hair is doing well.  Had it trimmed last week so can't say how long it is but it is health.  

Will talk soon....I hope.

I pray you are all well.

JD

Hang in there!  And I hope your feeling better! http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/950/bouquet.gif

I'd be beat too.  It beats me how you do so much but at least your hair looks good! ;)

Hey,

Thanx for the support LD and Lisabelle.  Not much new to tell.  Still doing the same things as written before.

One of my male friends (and his wife) came out this weekend to take some of the wood I chainsawed in the spring and he was kind enough to do my eve troughs (ok, spelt wrong but you get the idea).  Phew, I just CANNOT do heights!!!  I think I manage pretty well out here, but I am still a woman who cannot do all!!!  I work with both parties of the marriage and the wife told me I can borrow her hubby for things like that anytime.  It is good to have friends!!!  The hubby (I am not using initials because they have the same initials) and I are closer than wife and I...but that is only because I have known him longer.  I met her 2 years ago (they were not married then but were engaged) when they came out for wood and then she started working with us about 1.5 years ago so I started to get to know her.  I have known him for 5 years now.

I colleague of mine has hair down to her butt.  I can't say it was the healthiest I have ever seen...but it was that long.  She cut it all off 2 weeks ago.  It turns out it is because she has breast cancer and she has to do chemo.  I have seen a link here where people disagree with hair donations.  Imagine how she feels right now.  Darn, I wish that my hair was suitable for donation.  Sadly, it is not, nor is it long enough.  Perhaps she donated her own.  Her prognosis is good.  I keep her in my thoughts.  She is a not what I would call a friend...but working in a place with 1000 people, you can't get to know everyone well enough to be friends.  I know her to work with her, but not as a friend if you see what I mean.  I do like what I know of her.

Hair:  well, it seems healthy.  I have not measured it since my trim.  I guess it is mid-November and I should do.  Perhaps I will get it done this week.  I put the measure in my purse but I often forget to ask one of my friends to do it once I get into my work in the morning.  I am in at 6:30 and the next person arrives at 8 that I would ask...so by then it is far from my mind.  

On that note, I have to shower.  I have 90minutes until bed and it will not dry in that time.  The drier the better though.

LOL, this is the only place I know where I can say I have to go wash my hair and nobody will take offense.  I will try to do other people's journals soon.  The next week is hell.  After that, some outside of work things will lay off.  The OT will go on for a few months though.

JD

Hello All,

Just a quick note to let you know I am still alive and thinking of you all.  Haven't even checked my personal email for 3 weeks.  With the physio, doctor appointments, xmas coming and the over time....there is not time.  Heck, tonight for the first time in my life (remember my currents dogs are 14 and 15) I interviewed a dog walker.  Wish I could afford a maid!!!

I will get time to chat around xmas I reckon.  Take care all.  Hope you are all doing well.

JD

Hi there!  Nice to hear from you! http://www.smilieshq.com/smilies/happy0099.gif

You take care as well. ;)

I wanted to take a moment to wish you all a merry Christmas...or what ever you might celebrate at this time of year.  I hope to catch up with you in the New Year.  Take care all,

JD

Happy Holidays JD!! :D

Happy Yule and Merry Christmas to you too, Joeydog. *hug* I hope things calm down for you in the new year.

Merry Christmas, JD http://www.smilieshq.com/smilies/char1/character0181.gif

Merry Christmas! :D

Hello All,

Well, work is still so busy it is crazy.  I work 7 days a week and try to keep up with the house and all.  Ugh.

Okay, I have lots to do today so this is just a quick update for you all.

As I mentioned before, I had a lot of debts to take care of after being sick all those months.  I am down to taxes when tax time comes up.  I don't have the estimated $5000 I need for them but am looking into the info about paying it to the gov't in installments.  I had hoped to have the money come tax time but life has lots of surprises including coming home last week in the middle of a freak wind storm to discover that all the shingles had blown off my house.  Sigh.  That meant I had to take the next day off work to have the insurance people and roofers in to fix my house.  Oh well, I guess it comes with owning a house and I should just be grateful that I have a house.

The real Joey is doing okay.  He still has a happy little face and follows me around.  I had to buy him a winter jacket because while he loves to sit outside and watch the world go by, he gets cold.  Silly little guy doesn't come in when he is cold, he just sits out there shivering.  I have learned to put a coat on him, get him to lie on a blankie instead of the snow and bring him in after 30 minutes whether he wants to or not!!  I had to take him to the vet yesterday to get a prescription for an ear infection.  I weighed him and my poor little baby has lost 10 of his 55 lbs in the last month.  Time is certainly running out.  I just hope he lives to see spring.  I am feeding him soft food now...but even that he turns his nose up to more often than not.  Today I am going to look for liver for him.  While I can't eat the stuff and even the smell of it when I cook it repulses me...I will do it for him twice a day if I need to.  

The ex is STILL not working apparently.  Thank God we don't have kids that he would have to pay support for.  A friend of mine worked out that over the 9 years I have known my ex, he has worked less than 2.  Isn't that impressive????  He is still living with his mom and his sister is too because she 'can't' work either.  Mom must be so proud that she has raised 2/3 kids that wont make their own way in life!!!  As I have mentioned before, it is not even genetic because all the kids are adopted.  It is purely upbringing.  So sad since, while I never met dad since he died 10 years before I met my ex, dad had an industrial park named after him and made the family very comfortable financially.  Sadly the kids think he was a terrible dad because he was out working all the time.  Heck, the man died in his early 50's after 5 years in a sick bed.  Most people in their 40's are working hard...just not my ex's family I guess.  Oh, and he told me a couple of months ago (the last time we spoke) that he had a new girl who had an 11 and 13 year old.  Poor girl, now she has 3 children. It won't last.  He is toooooo selfish and lazy to have any kids around.  I am just sorry that the kids will get hurt in the process.  Nothing I can do about it though.

Me, well I am still single and not looking.  I have no time.  My animals are aging and take a lot of work (which I am glad to do to keep them comfy and happy).  I work a lot.  Soon I will have to tell my bosses it is too much.  I thought this big push would be over by the end of Jan and needed the overtime to pay off my debts....but now it looks like it will go until June/July which is tooooooo much.  But then there is that issue of $5000.  Sigh, my health because I am working too much or my health because I am stressing about debt... tough decision.

I am still as big as a beached whale.  My tendons in my legs are not healing so I cannot start running again.  I am going to go to a sport medicine doctor about that.  I need to start running at lunch just to cope with the overload of work!!!!

Hair: Well, I have to admit...I have not had time to do much for it.  It still has a nice shine to it and looks good but not because I have done anything good for it other than wash it 2/week at most with a very gentle cleaner and use Curly64's spray.  I don't even have jojoba oil in the house to oil the ends.  I am going to fix that today!!!  I am also going to do an EVOO infused with herbs deep moisturize!!!  I haven't measured it for a couple of months so I have no idea how long it is.

Some of you may recall that my finger nails were falling off because of psoriasis.  I have a medication I can take now that will supposedly fix that.  It will take 6 months to fix things because nails grow so slowly!!  It should also stop the scaling of my skin.  I LOVE THAT IDEA!!  Oh, and I am going to a sleep lab in April to figure out why I can only sleep 2-3 hours a night.  Hopefully that will increase my energy levels during waking hours!!

What do I think 2008 and hold for me?  Well, unlikely to be a man since I don't want one right now.  This is a time for me to figure me out.  I still hope to be happily married...but my dreams of having kids are becoming dim despite me desire.  Hopefully losing at least half, if not all, of the extra 40 lbs I am carrying around although I haven't gotten on to a diet just yet.  I want to do work on the house.  Because of finances I will be limited on that but my family gave me money for Xmas and I have some materials here from last summer to do things so hopefully I will get some stuff done.  K. out of room.  Sorry for the long rant.  

J

Your journals still make me tired after I read them ;), I can never believe how much you work and accomplish daily.  Just keep looking on the bright side because of all of the things that happen in life, your attitude towards it is really the only thing that you can control.

And don't worry about the IRS too much, even though it's tough not to worry about having outstanding debt when you don't know how you'll pay.  I just know from experience that the IRS can be very flexible and will work with you as far as a payment plan is concerned.

Take care sweetie!

LD, thanx for the ideas.  I checked into payments (I am actually in Canada so I don't do the IRS...but it is all the same really).  I found out that I would pay 8% interest.  I will have to check out what prime is when the time comes and think about doing it with my bank.  They will give me a loan for prime +2 which might be better.    Sigh, if I could just lose the weight, get past the psoriasis and pay off my taxes, this whole round of being sick would be behind me!!!  Hopefully by 2009 it will just be a bad memory.

I have taken tomorrow off work.  It is kinda funny to take a Tuesday off but the weather is supposed to be really bad tomorrow (freezing rain which is the worst in my opinion....I would rather a big snow storm when I have an hour long drive to work).  Sooooo, tonight I am going to watch a movie and am taking a moment to work on my hair since I have been neglecting it.  I just put EVOO infused with rosemary and sage into my hair.  I am going to wash it out in a few minutes, do an ACV rinse, do a scalp exfoliate with my conditioner and brown sugar mix, moisturize my scalp with aloe vera and then put on a leave in mixture of aloe vera/water/jojoba oil.  Once my hair dries I will put some jojoba on the ends.  I know it sounds like a lot in one night....but my hair has been soooooo neglected.  Maybe tomorrow I will do an avacado deep condition (Curly 64's recipe).  I should get it out of the freezer tonight so it thaws for tomorrow.

I haven't measured my hair for months.  I think the last time I did that was in October.  I wonder how long it is.  Well, I can't measure it myself but maybe on the weekend I will get Mum to measure it.  I can't even remember how long it was the last time I measured it!!!  22.5 inches I think?

Well, my movie is about to start.  I will have to wait until a dull moment in it to wash my hair out.  I ordered the movie on my satellite so I am stuck with the time it is on as opposed to being able to pause it.   >:(.

See you all soon,

JD

hey jd, you'll get it all taken care of. just take a deep breath, take care of your health first and foremost and your animals-since you want to enjoy your time with them. sounds like a good plan-the movie and hair treatment. those things always help me gain perspective when i'm in a stressful situation.  take care!
;)

RTG, I still cannot get over your hair!!!  It has grown soooooo much.

It is a rough week.  I have done nothing for my hair.  In fact, I need a shower period!!!  Ugh, I feel gross!!


Dad went into congestive heart failure on Monday and Joey (the real Joey) almost died on me this week.  Joey is 100% better today.  Dad is being treated and doing well.  Work is driving me into the ground!!

On the bright side, I am about to go grocery shopping and buy health food and hopefully I will finally get a good "diet" going.  When I get back I think I will shower, exfoliate, do stuff for my hair and all that good stuff.  A little pamper me time.  Heck, why not, after 6 days of diarhea from Joey, my house is sparkling clean from the constant cleaning!!!   Work can lay off for the rest of the day as I have already put in my 8 hours.

Gotta run,

JD

Sounds like you've had a really stressful time, JD!  I'm glad both Joey and your dad are doing better!


Take care of yourself, you are worth it!!!  Enjoy your pamper time!  ;D

I hope your dad's recovery is quick and full and the same for Joey!  Hope today is a better day for you.

(((Hugs))) Hang in there. :)

jd-i hope your dad and little joey are doing better soon. that is a lot to deal with.
thinking of you.   :)

Ugh...sorry about your dad and Joey.  I hope everything is beginning to look up now.  You've been doing so much for others, now it's time to take care of YOU.  Enjoy your pampering! :D

((((hugz)))) you hang in there!  I hope all will be better soon!

Thank you all for your support.  Dad is back home from the hospital and Joey has recovered.  I figured Dad would be okay but I am amazed Joey survived.  He is eating a hamburger and rice diet for a few more days but it doing pretty well.  Remember, he is coming up on 16 and is showing signs of age.

I got up at 4 this morning to start working.  Happy Sunday!!!  I got behind with work this week with Joey and Dad being sick so now I am playing catch up.  I working from 4 AM to 7 PM yesterday.  Oh well, I think this whole nightmare of too much work will be over in about 3 weeks and then I can have a life again.  Do you realize it has been 5 months of overtime for me!!!  And they say we Federal Gov't type don't do anything!!!

Tomorrow is a Provincial holiday.  Back in the fall the turkey that ran for .. gee I can't think of the position name...ok, leader of the province...oh ya, Premier (sp?) promised the third Monday of Feb off for everyone if they voted for him.  They did and the holiday exists...but some how the Prime Minister didn't take too kindly to being told what his Federal employees would do so I have to go to work.  This doesn't upset me too much as I get Rememberance day and 'civilians' don't.  What does bother me is that a big storm is coming through tonight (freezing rain followed by 30 cm of snow) and the ploughing will be done as though it is a Sunday.  Sigh.  You see, ONLY the Federal Gov't works tomorrow.  Pls note, the provincial and city gov't workers (who also get Rememberance Day off) are not working tomorrow.  Frankly, I think everyone should get Rememberance Day off to remember the lives given for our freedom.

Today I am going to oil my hair with EVOO infused with rosemary and sage.  After that I will give it a good wash (haven't washed it for about 4 days) and let her dry.  I have a trim coming up next weekend.  I have no idea how long it is.  I asked a male friend of mine to measure it for me last week but he calculated it was shorter than my mom measured it to be in November so I figure he screwed up.  I have never heard of shrinking hair.  Besides, shrinking hair does not create roots and I have had to have my hair colored at least twice since I last had Mum measure it.  And since Mum does a lot of successful sewing...well I trust her far more than this guy.

I am hoping to starting losing some weight once this overtime is done.  I have some people in the neighbourhood that are interested in starting running in April which will motivate me.  I am supposed to teach them.  I guess I can.  I mean, I might be so out of shape I have to retrain but I still know the routine and principals.  Also, by then the temperatures will get nicer, the days longer and I will want to be outside doing things.

Well, better get back to work.  Thank you all, again, for all your support and well wishes.  I hope you are all doing well.  I plan on taking a week off at the end of March so then I can catch up on what is up with all of you (although I will be busy doing jobs around the house).  Take care,

JD

Well Folks...the dreaded day has come.  Today I will put the real JD to sleep.  I don't think I could be in more pain than I am now.

Every where I go, I see him running around as a young dog.  The memories are flooding my life.  Yesterday, having made the decision, I took him for a two minute walk (it was all he could manage), a long car ride, down to the 'candy store' (the pet food store), over to see 'grandma and grandpa' and brought him home and fed him liver (yuk, but he loves it and it is all he will eat now).  Last night many people stopped by to say goodbye to him.  To be honest, I didn't want anyone to come here but I thought it best for him to have company other than my sobbing self.  My little dog walker had eyes as red as mine.  Joey enjoyed the day.

This morning Joey woke me up at 4 am wanting to go out.  I took his collar off and let him wander outside with Tatty (my other dog).  I fed him a bowl full of liver which he loved.  Tatty loves it too.  Poor Tatty.  She does not know that by bedtime tonight, the love of her life will not be here anymore.   I am not sure if she will fret away or get past it.  Only time will tell.  Right now Joey is sleeping comfortably.

Joey and I will enjoy the few hours we have left when he is awake.  At 3:30 my parents are coming over and we will cook a prime rib roast (that I will not be able to eat a bite of) and Joey and Tatty will be given freshly roasted meat, enjoy the smells and have the family around them.  At 6 pm my vet will arrive, I will try to say goodbye, Joey will go outside and lie on the blankets I have prepared for him...  I don't know if I will stay with him while it all happens.  That I am leaving until the last minute to figure out.  If I can't, my father will stay with him.  Then my vet will take my baby away and he will be cremated and ashes returned.  As for me, well I have asked my parents to leave right away and let me disintegrate alone with my poor Tatty.  Oh, I forgot, Tatty is getting valium ahead of the ending.  She has always been such an emotional dog, I want to make things as easy as I can for her.  She will have a nervous breakdown because I am having one.  By morning she will have figured out what has happened.

I have taken the week off to heal myself and to heal my Tatty as best as I can.  I bought her a tonne of doggie junk food when we went to the candy store yesterday in hopes of getting her to eat.  I have also asked my dog walker to come and walk her each day (after tomorrow) for the next two weeks so that she gets some time doing different things other than hanging with me.  I wont wash Joey's bedding for a few days so Tatty can still smell him.  I plan on taking her out each day to new places to walk and to distract her as best as I can.

As for me....I dunno how I will get through the next few days.  I see Joey is awake.  I think I will take him for a little drive right now.  I have found that I cannot download the pics from my camera and I only have space for 6 more photos.  Maybe we will drive to Walmart and see if they can download the pics to a disk for me in a very short time.  The candy store doesn't open until 9 so maybe I should wait a few minutes and then I can let him do a little walk around the candy store one last time.  I was sorry I didn't have my video camera with me when I took him yesterday.  He still had to sniff everything...even if he didn't want any treats.

Ok, gonna run.  I can't believe how fast time is going.  My beloved Joey will be gone in in less than 12 hours....after 15 years of joy.  I wish I had some poetry in me....I would write a poem for him.  I guess the song 'Ole Shep' will have to do.  It is by Elvis.  Don't read it if you are prone to  getting teary.  It is a heartbreaker.

God help me through this day.

JD

((((hugs))) I am so sorry to hear about your dog. :'(  I know how you feel, my bunny of many, many years died this year.  There not in pain anymore, there happy now with all the other pets in pet heaven.  Remember all the good times with him as do with my sweet little bunny ((((hugs)))

You have my complete understanding and utter sympathy.  In 2002 hubby and I had to have our beloved Sparky dog put to rest.  He was a month shy of being 14 years old, and had starting suffering mini strokes.  It is never easy saying goodbye to such faithful companions as our pets are but, for their sake, we must.  There are times when I still cry for that dog (like right now) but mostly I am now able to remember the good times.  I wish you a quick sense of peace and lots of fond memories.  *hugs*

JD, of course I'm crying having just finished your post.  No need for me to read "Ole Shep".

Your plan sounds wonderful.  I wish I had had the time to plan when my Magus died.  You are such a loving mommy, JD and Tatty are lucky.

I know nothing I have to offer will make it hurt any less, so I offer you a cyber (hug).

Bon voyage, real JD, to the rainbow bridge!!!

:'( :'( :'( :'(I am so sorry to hear of your gigantic loss!  My heart breaks for you,JD and everyone else that is there sharing this with you.   I wish and hope God's speed in healing.  I know Rainbow's Bridge will be honored to have such a wonderful companion as JD is grace their presence.

Hello All,

Thank you all for your support.  Joey died quietly in my arms at 7:29 tonight.  I wasn't sure I could stay with him but I did and I am glad I did.  I stayed with him to the end.  

He had a good day.  We did all the things I said and he ate better than he has in the last 6 weeks.  Of course I fed him liver and prime rib which would have made him make terrible messes had he not...........left me tonight.  Sorry, that is wrong...he died tonight.  I took about 60 pictures of him and I video taped him.  

About 3 years ago I bought 2 jasmine candles.  They are set in 8 inch high glass, have actual jasmine flowers at the bottom...preserved, and 24 hours of burning compasisty.  I have never burned them since they were $50 each and were bought to look nice. (and they still smell great).  Tonight they are burning in my window with Joey's 8 X 10 photo in between them.  I will not let them burn until the candles are gone all at once as I must sleep and Tatty needs me.  I will burn them every night (while I am awake) until they are gone.  

LD and Lisabelle, once you told me how to post photos and I know I set up an account but cannot remember where I was told to do it.  While this is about me....I would like to post some photos of Joey and, since none of you have seen Tatty, a few of Tatty.  Can you remind me?

I thought about changing my user name because using Joey will hurt for a while...but I think that would be wrong.  Joey will always be a part of me.

But right now, I have to look after Tatty.  I think she knows Joey is gone...but she is acting like she wants me to bring him back.  If only I could. I cannot.  So from here on she is a priority.  But Joey will never be forgotten and I hope you will indulge me when I speak about him.

BTW, I learned tonight that losing Joey was harder by 1000X than losing my husband.

JD

PS, I am drawing a blank but I know either Lisabelle or LD is a poet.  If I told you some things about Joey, could you write a little poem about him?

PPS, I saw that a couple of you mentioned Rainbow Bridge.  I thought I must have mentioned it but I see I didn't.  When I was a vet I used to send that poem to my clients after they lost an animal.  I told Joey today "Go to Rainbow Bridge, run, be happy and herd all my other bables for me when I come."  

I'm so sorry about your loss.  I know how much you loved your Joey.

The site you want to go to to be able to post photos is http://www.photobucket.com You can upload photos from your computer onto that site and insert the links into your posts.

I'm no poet, that would be Lisabelle.

Take care.

Thanx LD.

JD

((((((JD))))))

I am so sorry to hear about Joey.  :'(

Having to put down a pet is one of the worst things ever, and it never gets any easier no matter how many times you go through it. If it does, something's wrong.
But be relieved in your knowledge that Joey is no longer suffering, will never have to hurt again and will love you and be with you always.

Personally, I have lost 2 dogs to cancer, so I understand the grief that you'll be carrying around for awhile. One day, I hope you can look at pictures and videos of Joey without crying and feel blessed to have had him in your life.

Take care.

Hello All,

Thank you all so much for all your support the last couple of days.  You are all great.

I did okay for the most part of the day.  I have been crying for the past 3-4 hours but made it until then.  The candles are burning and the picture of Joey is now in a frame.

Tatty is fretting.  She wont leave the bedroom unless I drag her out.  I gave her some of the left overs from the prime rib dinner last night and she carefully put then on Joey's bed and then sat in her own.  I took her out to the candy store today and for a walk.  When we got home I gave her a Dentabone (her fav snack) which is now sitting on Joey's bed next to the uneaten roast beef.  Some believe animals do not feel, think or communicate.  Tell me she is not hurting and has found a way to tell me!!!! Hopefully tomorrow she will feel a little better.

On that note, while I am heart broken right now, I must blow out the candles and try to sleep.  Tomorrow I will get up bright and early and take Tatty for a walk and maybe to see my folks.  I must keep her busy so she heals.  

JD

Tanya,

   I am so sorry about Joey!  I am praying for you at this sad time in your life.  I have experienced loss recenlty and know just how you feel.  Thinking about you, dear!

Blondestorm

Thank you Blondestorm.  I will be in touch with you soon.

4days since I lost my son.  I cry myself to sleep each night.  I dream of him every night.  I dreamt he took me out for a bike ride and we found a little girl dog named maggie the he felt would be perfect for me to have as a new dog.  There is no Maggie and I am not looking yet.  Still, maybe I should name my next female Maggie....althouth Tatty is doing so badly there will be no new dog until she is gone.

Today is day 3 since I lost my son.  Tatty still will not eat.  If I leave her alone she is shaking when I come back.  Tonight she literally jumped 7 stairs.  As a pup she could have done it.  Tonight, she broke her leg.  She is hurting worse that I am and I cannot help her.  

I went to work for part of the day today.  Apparently that hurt Tatty too much.  I am still burning the candles for Joey.  God I miss him.  I want to hold him, etc.

The 'pup' is not doing well.  As I told you she broke her leg tonight and she still will not eat.  Poor little baby.  For over 14 years she has never spent a day without him.  She came to me and woofed before she jumped the stairs.  I had cuddled her, offered her food and took her outside....she is not asking for those things...she is asking for Joey...which I cannot give her or me.

I am afraid I will lose her soon.  

Why is life so hard at times?

JD

Reminds me of Where The Red Fern Grows...  :(

Angel, I am not familiar with your reference.  Can you expand please?

Tatty is doing better today.  She ate a little.  The family spent the day here with her today and the dog sitter came to see her.

One day at a time is the only way to go.

JD

Where The Red Fern Grows is a novel by Wilson Rawls about a boy and his 2 hunting dogs. Very memorable story - most folks read it in grade school.
   Anyway, at the end of the novel, the male dog dies and the female dog refuses to eat, having lost the will to live, and dies also.

I am so sorry to hear about your loss.   You are in my prayers and i wish you beautiful long hair. xo curlygirl

Hello All,

Well, it has been just a little longer than 2 weeks since I lost me precious son.  I miss him terribly.  The emptiness can be unbearable at times.

On the bright side, Tatty decided not to do like the Fern story Angel mentioned.  She is eating and is doing okay.  She seems pretty content with life.  Sometimes I think she must be lonely and I feel sad for her, but she does okay.

Thank you all for your support two weeks ago.  It really helped.  Talking to people in my life was difficult because I got all teary.  You guys couldn't hear me crying on the computer!!!

Take care,

JD

Hello All (that remember me),

Well, I guess I should start with hair since that is what this site is about.  I dunno how long it is.  I have not measured it since November I guess.  It is past BSL anyway.  I get a lot of compliments about it and have refered people to this site.

I know you are all going to think I only show up when things are bad....and maybe you are right since the time I returned to work.  As you know, I lost my 'son' at the end of March.  Since then I have been diagnosed with a heart disease, sleep apnea, my car died (which living 20 km from the nearest store and 45 from the nearest bus stop is a rather large problem).  Work has had me overloaded with overtime for months.  All this has kept me too busy to contact any of you.  As difficult as this has all been, I have struggled on.

But tonight I am facing one of my worst nightmares.  There will be many of you that have faced this and for those who have not...you all will.  Still, today is my day.  My father died at 1 am on July 10th.  My sister (who some of you will know is a bit of a problem) has been a trooper to this point.  My mother has kept strong.  My mother wanted to see my father's body.  My sister, although she has done much over the past...almost 24 hours...could not face it and so I went with my mother.  It was hard but best for both of us I believe.

I am, of course, teary, heartbroken and unsure how to survive this.  But life can be cruel.  My father will be buried on Monday July 14th.  That is my b-day.  Of course I kinda knew when he died on a Thurs. morning, it would be on Monday and I knew it was my b-day.  I thought it kinda sucked but thought it is just one b-day and it would be .... well okay I guess. "So one b-day would suck" was the  sort of attitude I had.  That was until I thought about it more.  For the rest of my life my b-day will be the day we buried my dad and that will be in my siblings minds each year too.  And my poor sweet mother.....it will always be the day she buried her husband of 51 years.  God bless my poor mother.  While I hurt, I cannot imagine the sorrow and pain she must feel.  I watched her take the wedding band off my father and tell him how proud she has been of him and how much she loves him and will miss him.  God bless her...she is being so strong and so selfless right now.  I know she will survive this...but where she finds the strength I do not know.

My parents met when my mother was 19 and they dated until they married when she was 21.  For the next 51 years she raised 3 children, held my father's hand thru 4 open heart surgeries, two cancers and countless other things.  At 72 she has lost her husband and we are not even sure what caused his death.  We will never know.  He died in hospital while they were trying to figure out what was ailing him.  We do not wish to autopsy.  They did EVERYTHING together from shopping, sit down meals 3 times a day, etc.  They were never apart.  Now after 53 years she is alone.  Tonight she lies in a bed alone knowing Daddy will never come back.  In the morning she will eat her first breakfast without Daddy, etc.  Yes I know I am being dramatic...but these are my thoughts.

What we children are going thru can never compare with that.  But on my selfish note...how can I ever really celebrate my b-day again knowing that my family is going to be constantly reminded that this day is the day we buried my dad?  

I know that someone out there is going to tell me that one of their parents died on their b-day.  Yes, that is worse and I cannot negate that.  My condolences to you since I know it must be terrible.

I am sure that all of you that have lost a parent can tell me the date of their death in a flash.  How many of you can remember the date of the buriel without thinking about it for a second is what I would like to know.  My family will always remember that my daddy died on July 10th...and because of my b-day they will always remember he was buried on July 14th.  They will never have to think...and every year they will gather on my b-day and remember.  Unlike my name, I cannot change my b-day.  Right now I just want to forget my b-day from now on.

Yes, I know many of you will feel I am full of self pity.  I cannot refute that.  Yes, I am.

But tonight my 'son' is sleeping at the feet of my father.  In this I take some solice.

JD

PS (I planted a lilac bush in memory of the real Joey Dog once spring came.  Today a planted an apple tree in memory of my father.  This is my place to remember them.  God bless them both.)

I'm so sorry very for your loss.  One of the toughest things that we have to go through in life is losing our parents.  So, far I've lost 3 (including my grandparents who helped raise me) but the losses never get easier.

Hopefully, your birthday won't be a constant reminder of the day that your father died however, if it becomes that, I promise that as time goes on, eventually you will be able to reminsice about the good times that you spent with him instead of focusing solely on the sadness of his no longer being here.

Take it easy sweetie,
La Diosa

JD,I am so sorry for your loss.  I keep you in my prayers all the time.  Yet I know I feel there are no words to express my sincere sympathy to you and your family.  Have faith,keep looking at the light at the end of the tunnel.

JD you are in my thoughts.

You have all my condolences, JD.  :(  And I've said a prayer for you and your family.

I'm sure that while your family may remember the day that your father died, they probably won't remember that he was buried on your b-day. And even if they do remember, there's nothing that any of you can do to change that.
   But you mustn't let that ruin future b-days for you. I'm quite sure that that's not how your father would want it. So smile for his sake and be relieved that he did not die on your b-day.

Peace and blessings.

JD, I'm very sorry for your loss.  While it is good to hear from you, I'm sorry it is under these circumstances.

The lilac bush and apple tree sound wonderful!  When my Magus died I planted a lime tree in his honor and it is a comfort to me when we use the limes.

That sucks about your car, and your health issues.  I hope you'll find a way to take care of yourself-more important than housework.

I am very sorry for your loss.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Jerry