New year. New hair journal. New start.  ;)

This morning, I did the usual clarifying routine with Purity shampoo, an ACV rinse, Daily Moisture Renewal and Ice Shine conditioners. Plenty of cool water as well, naturally. All of my hair "stuff" is still Pantene, obviously.

It's been a reasonably good 3-day weekend. My parents spent the time galavanting around Disneyland and the Queen Mary, leaving the rest of us to do as we wished. hehehe While the cats are away...  ;)

My father's homeless friend didn't stick around much. In fact, no one has seen him since yesterday afternoon when my sister dropped him off at the trolley station. We're all relieved that he's gone, though. Even if only temporarily.

Unfortunately for my sister, she had to spend NYE working, just like the night before. She hasn't had much of a "weekend."

As for me, I spent the evening watching '80's movies like Ghostbusters and Moonwalker, and talking to my distant sweetheart on AIM.
   Just before the hour struck, I ran outside and looked around to see if any of the neighbours were lighting fireworks. But the first thing that caught my eye was the magnificence of the sky that night! The moon was very bright and illuminated the edges of the heavy gray clouds that stretched in large patches all across the darkness. Between them, you could see the black sky underneath and a few tiny but gorgeous stars. It was breathtaking.

A couple from the house across the street came out to see if the neighbours were lighting fireworks, just like I had, and we exchanged Happy New Year wishes. At that very moment...fireworks. About 4 or 5 houses set them off. Just small ones, of course, mostly red and green.
   Eventually, the frigid winter air became too much for the 3 of us standing out on the sidewalks and we went back into our respective houses.

As I was making up my resolutions for this year, I also made some hair resolutions:
1.) Stay away from Suave entirely
2.) Take vitamin E every day for 6 months
3.) Take a multivitamin every day for 6 months after that
4.) Determine whether either one of these affects my hair in any way

Is it unnatural that I should have more hair resolutions than otherwise?  ;D  My only non-hair-related ones were to eat healthier and get more exercise. I do make it a point to keep my New Year's resolutions realistic and attainable. Much higher success rate that way.  ;)

Anyway, as promised, it is indeed a brand new year. Thankfully, all of the woes from the previous one have been shed and I look to the promise of every new day and welcome the opportunity that it brings. A rebirth. I like the sound of that. A fresh start. A new beginning.

Hope everyone had a great New Year and that 2007 finds everyone happy and well.  :)

Congratulations on your new journal.  I hope this year is everything you want it to be and more!!!

Thank you kindly, Sakina.  :)

So today was another simple WCC day. The usual wet datangle + oil, then braided when dry. I'm still not very good at braiding my own hair, but whatever. At least it's out of the way.

So, onto the randomly assorted current subjetcs...I started a daily vitamin E regimen on December 30th. As per my resolution, I'll stick with it for 6 months. The bottle should be just about empty by then.
   On Sunday, I ordered 6 new pairs of the "sexy jeans" that I love so much (thanx for the check, grandpa!). Finally, I will be able to replace the black khaki "fat pants" in my closet with something decent. lol
   Also on Sunday, I gave myself a new matching mani-pedi for New Year's, but I'm not thrilled with the colour. It's called Midnight Magic by Cover Girl and is sort of a metallic black, I guess. But the metal flakes appear more of a very dark navy blue or something. Rather odd. It's like...if you're gonna do black, do black already! Don't try to doll it up  and make it trendy by adding some other colour because the masses don't have the guts to actually wear black. Or maybe it's their "creative spin on the traditional black." hehehe Ok, I'm done now.  ::)
   My birthday is in 6 days. Huzzah.
   Looking forward to Valentine's Day, so hurry on, February! And that concludes our assortment of random facts.

On the subject of hair once again, I'm currently at 23" and counting.  :)  This year will find me reaching a few milestones: one being my short-term goal of 2 feet, another being my next short-term goal of BSL. I will also reach Stardust level here at LongLocks.  :)

Lots of things to look forward to this year.

Hair: Yesterday was another fairly simple day. WWCC, detangled as usual, oiled the ends. Once again, I forgot to take a hairtie with me to work, so my hair stayed down all day.
   Today was a wash, treat, condition, condition. I squeezed the excess water from my hair with my microfiber towel before applying the Deep Fortifying Treatment and leaving it on under a shower cap for the usual hour. My hair was soooo soft when I rinsed it out!  :)
   Detangled as usual and oiled the ends. And yes, today I brought a hairtie, so I'll make another wonky-looking braid when I get my break at 3:00.

Products I'm currently using are: Ice Shine shampoo & conditioner, Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, Detangle leave-in spray conditioner for detangling, Purity shampoo for clarifying and Deep Fortifying Treatment for deep conditioning. All by Pantene.
   For oiling, I've gone back to a simple solution of baby oil & water. For clarifying, I'm using ACV rinses between 2 washes. For detangling, I've given up on brushes altogether and am now using an assortment of seamless combs by Conair and Rachael Stephens. Oh yes, and for drying, I use a microfiber towel and...air. That's it. No fans, no blowfryers.

Work: The phone is ringing off the bloody hook today, and I have a box of files from Human Resources to go through. All this work, man! Can't they see that I'm trying to surf the net? lol
   Today, I was supposed to have the morning shift, but here I am in the afternoon. I was informed last night that I may be switching to afternoon shifts only. That would be a freaking dream!!  :D  I'd finally be able to reclaim my old nightowl schedule. hehe

Love: So *he* didn't make it out for NYE.  :(  Ah well. It wouldn't have been convenient anyway. Once again, we're waiting until time and money permit...and when my aunt & uncle ask me to housesit again.
   These days, I'm still fluctuating between certainty and worry. Long distance relationships require a great amount of faith and trust. When you don't have that, it weakens easily. Sometimes, I have to be strong for the both of us when fear and doubt creep up on *him.* But that same fear and doubt affects me as well...probably more so. But that goes back to faith and trust. You've got to believe in something if you want it to work.

Life: Life? That's a joke, right?  :P  There's a homeless, lying, smoking sponge who thinks that he knows everything living in my house. Homeboy lives on a steady diet of Pringles and diet sodas...I have no idea how.
   Last night, I learned that I am more or less the only legitimate Christian in my immediate family. Possibly the only one out of all of my family in CA. Somewhat disturbing, because I was raised Christian (albeit loosely) by the very people who now have little or no faith at all. Of course, it's their choice. Makes me that much more grateful for my awesome, musical, Christian guy.  ;)
   Speaking of *him* again, were it not for more impending dental work in May, I'd use my tax return to visit *him* in MI. Someday...

A new year, a new age. Today is my 27th birthday. Nothing particularly significant about it, unless you count the many people who died at that age. Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Jim Morrison, Robert Johnson, Brian Jones...

Anyway, tonight I'll be going to dinner with my immediate family. Not sure where...I originally wanted to go to an awesome local Mexican place called Casa de Pico, but my mother insisted that I choose between Claim Jumper and the Olive Garden. *shrug* Not sure whether my sister will be there or if she's working tonight. So...yeah. But I get to go out just the same.

The real bummer is that "my guy" can't be here to celebrate with me. *He's* always here in spirit, of course, but it would be nice if he could be here for real. But there I go dreaming again...  ::)

On the hair front, today was a simple care day. Just a WCC, detangle, oil. After about 100 attempts to pin it up on the sides, it finally worked. I even put little rhinestone hair spins in for fun.

Actually, I managed to go all out with makeup, jewelry and perfume today. Being totally put together is a good feeling. I do wish that I had more time to do that every day.

hahaha One of my favourite Tool songs just came on the radio. I haven't heard it in ages. And yes, I am at work.  ;D  So long as the customers and my co-workers can't hear it, I can listen to whatever I want. Now it's The Shins...and my sweetheart is right. They are pretty Beach Boys-ish. But now I'm rambling.  :P

Aside from drowning in work and the recent addition of a paper cut, there's nothing else to report. In fact, it's almost time for me to shut things down here. Hope everyone is doing well.

Happy Birthday!   I hope this year will bring you much joy, happiness, and love......

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!  [smiley=birthdays.gif]  ;D

Happy Birthday, Angel!!!!!!!!!!!!!

New year, new age, new outlook, everything's fresh and new!  I only wish that I could have gotten this wish to you yesterday!  Hope you had a great time with your family, and that your sister was able to be there too.

I like your resolutions for this year, I'm not much of a "resolution" person myself, but I've agreed to stay persistent with a few changes myself.  Like you with your vit E, I'm on myself to take magnesium, biotin, and brewer's yeast daily, and have been good about it.  I am staying clear (as best I can) of all but Pantene, our steady faithful, and I also am doing my best to use my products up from start to finish- to avoid the "left overs" in the closet. :P  I've actually committed to these about a month ago, and am doing pretty good.  :)  I'm also going to try to do my best to avoid procrastination, something I am queen of...but we'll see how that one goes.  Don't want to put my body into shock overload!

Has Pringle-boy come back yet, or is he gone for good?  Maybe he's finally off to continue life on his own...

Thanx, everybody!  :D

Maggie: LOL @ "Pringle-boy." That's good. Where he's concerned, he is living in an RV that my father bought him, which is parked on our property. Cleaning it up has kept him busy, but he still takes his meals with us, goes places with us, uses our bathroom, etc. Heaven knows how long it will be before he's really on his own.
   And your "resolutions" sound good to me.  ;)

Birthday Stuff: Dinner was great, despite having to sit next to my father's homeless friend. And having to endure the reek of lingering cigarette smoke as he rode up and back with us in the car. Ahem. But aside from that, it was fun.  :)
   We did end up going to Casa de Pico as I'd wanted. I had 2 enormous tacos with lots of guacamole and an absolutely amazing drink...I don't remember what all was in it, but it tasted like sour Skittles.  ;)  When everything was done, the waitress brought a dessert with a candle in it, which I later learned was a flan, and the mariachi guitar guys came over and sang Happy Birthday to me...in English (for the most part). haha
   As for presents, I got jewelry from my parents and sister, a giftcard from my parents, and my grandfather in WA even sent me a check in the mail. Woohoo!
   I have to admit that I teared up when I saw his card signed with just "Grandpa" rather than "Grandma & Grandpa."  :'(  Guess I'll just have to get used to that.

Hair: Yesterday was the usual clarifying routine. 2 Pantene Purity washes, an ACV rinse in between. Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Nothing else. I combed it once after it was dry and just left it alone.
   Today, I washed once with Ice Shine shampoo, then treated for an hour...only, I forgot my microfiber towel and shower cap in my room again, so I had to just do things as I used to: squeeze the water out of my hair, load it up with the Deep Fortifying Treatment, then pin it up with my beak clip. When that was done, I rinsed it out and followed with DMR and Ice Shine conditioners. Detangled as usual, and oiled the ends. And typically, I'll comb and braid at 3:00 when I get my break here at the office.

Life: Resolutions are going well, though I have been eating a lot of cheap chocolate lately.  :-[  Chalk it up to starvation, availability and, of course, Aunt Flo.  :P  Still taking vitamin E every day. I take one when I wake up every morning, since I store it in the same place as all of my "shower goods" anyway. So it's easy. I'm also looking forward to measuring on the first of February.

The 6 pairs of brand new "sexy jeans" that I ordered arrived a few days ago. Now I will finally be able to replace all of my khaki "fat pants" from years ago with something decent.  :D  Looks like a new size comes with everything else as well.  ;)

On the work front, it's still busy as heck. Every day, a different department brings us stacks of old documents to destroy. I don't mind that. Gives me a good excuse to take out some pent up aggression. hehehe Not really.  ::)  We're still going through old Human Resources files, and the phone is insanely busy, which doesn't make either task easy. Such is life.

As for the boy...ugh.  >:(  Sore subject once again. In fact, the only reason that I bothered bringing him up at all is because that's the majority of what's been on my mind all day. When your heart's involved, you can't help it. Otherwise, I would, because I'd rather not dwell on it. Any guy that acts the way he does sometimes isn't worth dwelling on. I'll say that much and nothing more.  >:(
   More and more often, I've been wondering whether this will be the year that I finally throw in the towel. It's not what I want, but it may be what I need. Perhaps one of my resolutions for next year will be giving up on guys entirely. They have never brought me anything but misery. *sigh* Confusion...

This, this is our new song
Just like the last one
A total waste of time,
My iron lung
       -Radiohead, My Iron Lung

Simple WCC day today, as I had to get up early. I've actually been up since 2:00 am.  :-/

Still using Ice Shine S&C + DMR as a second conditioner. My supply of Detangle leave-in conditioner and Deep Fortifying Treatment are both running low, and I seem to be going through my oil solution faster than usual as well. Probably because I'm actually using it every day now. heh

Hair is down, dry and waiting to be braided. Not sure when I'll get a break today.
   In case anyone's wondering, I write almost all of these entries at work. That's what the breaks are all about. Sometimes I write them from the computer in my uncle's landscape office when I can sneak in there late at night (I have a key). But that's a whole 'nother story in itself.

When I return home, I'm planning to do laundry and hopefully wash out my cleaning gloves, as I suspect that my father's homeless friend may have used them.  :P  I don't know for sure, but that's exactly what bothers me.

After that, I'm going to clean up, goth myself out and head up to Viejas for some much-needed shopping therapy. Mountain air always does wonders for me.

Hair: Been doing the simple WCC thing for awhile. Detangling with Pantene's leave-in spray conditioner and my broken Rachael Stephens #45 comb. Random thought: if I could get my hands on another RS #45, I'd be happy as a clam. But I can't seem to find them anywhere anymore.
   Anyway, today was the first day in a long while that I haven't oiled the ends. Someone was in my bathroom and I couldn't get to my oil bottle before the ends dried. *sigh* Oh well.

Also, I haven't been able to get away with more than 1 hair treatment this week. I usually try to cram as many as I possibly can into a week, but not this time. Perhaps I'll do a heavy EVOO overnight treatment tonight to compensate.
   Still anticipating measure day on 2/1. I don't know why. It's not like I'm expecting to see a sudden surge of growth or anything. Maybe I'm just looking forward to yet another new month. Who knows...?

Health: This morning, I jumped on the scale, filled with dread. I was sure it was going to greet me with a 125 or something. But no...119!! I'm in the teens again! And I haven't even been working out! I guess all that power walking in the fall really picked my metabolism back up! I can't wait for the weather to warm up just enough that I can get back out there again. After years of being messed up from harsh steroids, my body is finally responding to exercise.  :)  Maybe that little rock & roll figure of mine will show itself again after all!

Love: *sigh!* Yesterday was the 2nd day this week that he and I didn't speak at all. All of this after he blew up on me at the tail end of Tuesday night, all but destroying our once great connection. I can't help but feel as if he took a seam ripper to our common thread and severed us completely.
   For about a year and a half, he's been my life support. My iron lung. The one who has understood me and kept me going even in the toughest of times. But now I'm beginning to realize not only how volatile and unstable a person he is, and therefore how volatile and unstable our relationship is...but also that it's been a pretty one-sided relationship in general.
   Now that we aren't speaking, I can't help but look back and notice all of the instances, great and small, where I didn't get back what I was giving out. It's been like that for almost as long as we've known each other, and that is certainly not a good omen for the future. Plus, I don't need to go down that road again!
   In short, I don't need this. So I've been weighing my options.  :-/

Life: I never made it to the mountains the other day. But my soul still longs for them. For the air and the quiet emptiness. And of course the shopping.  ;D  It's all very therapeutic, and I need new socks anyway.
   Another thing I've been meaning to do is drive out to the shoreline to watch the sun set. Only God remembers the last time I did that. I miss it. I've been missing a lot of things lately that I used to do. The art and music that I used to live for have been neglected for far too long. So perhaps this year will bring yet another rebirth on the creative end. We'll see.

Right now, however, I'm waiting to see what (if anything) transpires with "The Distant One." He's never been so distant as he is now. And without him, I must learn to breathe on my own. I certainly can't wait forever.

Everything In Its Right Place: Well, once again, the divine powers have intervened and the boy and I have managed to work things out. Fences are mended, turbulence cleared. Breathing normally. Thank God.

Hairy Beast Of Burden: Today was a WWCC day. Ice Shine shampoo twice (my hair needed it), then Ice shine and DMR conditioners respectively. I ran out of Pantene leave-in spray conditioner this morning and had to replace it with the TRESemmé leave-in conditioner that I bought yesterday. I tend to prefer the latter because 1.) it is oil-free, which is important in most every product I buy, and 2.) it smells a bit like old fashioned roses. We goths usually dig that sort of thing.  ;)
   Anywho, sprayed, combed, oiled the ends, air dried, then braided at the office. It's one of the wonkiest braids I've ever done, but whatever. If I ever make a decent one, it will happen by pure luck. It's back, it's out of the way, it's oiled. Forget about it.

Odds And Ends: Picked up 3 new CD's over the weekend: Loud, Fast Ramones - Their Toughest Hits, Tool's Undertow and Radiohead's Kid A. The latter has sentimental value attached to my distant sweetheart. *giggle* That's all I'm gonna say. The Ramones one has 30 songs on it, which isn't that shocking when you consider that most of their songs were only 2-3 minutes long, but it's one that I've been coveting for quite sometime. Has all my favourites on it.
 
Amidst the last conflict between my distant guy & I, I got another offer from a bartender who works at the restaurant with my sister. And though I was trying to keep my options open, my heart still cried out for *him* all the while. *He* and I salvaged things, and that other offer was history. Stopped it dead in its tracks before anything had a chance to happen, really. The bartender guy is cool enough as a person, but not right for me. If nothing else, at least I know what I want.
   
Jamba Juice had badly burned something as I stood waiting for at least 15 minutes for my order before rushing off to work. And the stench became trapped in my hair.  :P  I tried rolling down the window while driving to let it air out, but it didn't help much. So now I get to go through the rest of the day with hair that smells of charred something or rather.  :(  Ah well.

Alright, time to close things up here for another night. Hurry on, February!

In an interstellar burst,
I'm back to save the universe
            -Radiohead, Airbag

Hey! Ho! Let's go!

Another late night, another late morning. Nothing wrong with that in my book as long as it isn't too late. Some mornings, I do need time for hair treatments and such.
   Today, however, was not one of those mornings and I rolled out of bed at 9:30 am, still tired. I keep wishing for just one day where I could do nothing but sleep. Just sleep! My weary bones would be so thankful.
   Part of the problem is that I don't sleep consistently through the night and haven't in a long while. That's also, I surmise, why I never dream anymore...not that I miss it. My unconscious dreams have never been positive. But I don't suppose that I ever sleep deeply enough to dream. Such is life...

In any case, today was a clarifying day, so I didn't need tons of time. The usual Purity shampoo & ACV routine, but this time I left the DMR conditioner in my hair on until the end of my shower. Force of habit, I guess. So I didn't condition twice. My bottle of ACV is now empty, so I'll soon be replacing it with the largest bottle of distilled white vinegar that I can afford. I just prefer it.
   No leave-ins or detangling. I didn't really even separate the strands while they were still wet. Just let them air dry as they were, then finger combed. When my break came at 3:00, it was off to the restroom to comb and braid. Another wonky braid, I may add.  :P  But at least my hair doesn't smell like "burned stuff" today.

Homeless homeboy (can I still technically call him that?) is still living in his RV on the side of our house. He comes in to eat and visit, but aside from that, he keeps to himself. I think that he may be moving to a trailer park eventually...not sure. At least he hasn't been disturbing the peace so much anymore.

20 minutes left here at work and not much else to report. The boy and I are good, things are back to "normal," though I am not about to let things go unchecked. A girlfriend reminded me the other day that love is an action, not just a feeling. So I'm still waiting for *him* to stop procrastinating and produce a little bit more. Minimal effort gets you nowhere fast. Laziness is for suckers. And all that pseudo-motivational jazz. We'll see how things go.

Anyway, tomorrow will probably be a much-needed treatment day. I'll see if I can score some time alone with the bass as well. hehe Later, gaterz!

As a person who is chronically sleep deprived and does not dream, I know what you speak of.  ;)  I've found a glass of wine before bed helps me to relax and improve my sleep a bit.  (Of course the sleep inducing drugs the doctors have given me guarantee sleep, but I prefer to stay away from those).   8-)  But sleeping until 9:30am!!   :o I wish I could be so blessed!  If I'm not out of bed by 6:30 (and that is sleeping really late) my body aches all day.  My usual out of bed time is 4:45 in the summer and 5:00 in the winter.  I'm in bed by midnight, but don't usually fall alseep until 2 and I awaken every 20 - 60 minutes.  I've been like this for 25 years.  I've learned to live on little sleep, but I don't recommend it.  Try to work at getting some quality sleep before you totally ruin your sleeping habits.

wrote on Jan 16^th, 2007 at 7:35pm:

Laziness is for suckers.

;D

I'm sorry but I had to laugh at that!  Laziness is not a good thing but for some reason, put that way it tickled me.  I'd love to see that on a bumper sticker or something. ;)

I've had sleeping issues all of my life so I definitely feel for ya.  Bikerbraid is right, wine before bed works well although, I do take prescription sleeping pills from time to time too.

BB: 25 years of sleep deprivation? Quel horreur! I totally sympathize. 9:30 sounds luxurious until I mention that I went to bed around 5:00 am. Nocturnal tendencies are common for goths, musicians and goths in love with musicians.  ::)  Such is life. But you're quite right, I should develop a better routine before these bad habits take hold forever.

La Diosa: hehe thanx. That's not to say that I'm not guilty of it on occasion. As for the wine, well, I NEVER touch alcohol, with the exception of a rare sip here and there to taste something. So that's out for me.  :P

Last night, I set my alarm to wake me at 8:00 am, but my father came pounding on my door at around 7:55 and announced that he needed me to go to the ranch within the hour and take the blankets off of our horses. I knew that this would cut into my alotted time for a hair treatment and was not pleased, but I did as I was asked. It was nice to see the boys again anyway.
   Before heading out to the ranch, I whipped up my version of a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment, using Pantene's Deep Fortifying Treatment as a deep conditioner. So after returning home and jumping in the shower, I left this on for an hour. During that time, I started a load of laundry, washed and dried all of my seamless combs, straightened up my room a bit and ate. No "quality time" with the bass, sadly.  :(  I seem to be inexplicably avoiding it. Not good.

After rinsing the concoction out of my hair, I followed it with Daily Moisture Renewal and Ice Shine conditioners respectively. During my rush to get ready for work, I sprayed on my new TRESemmé leave-in conditioner, detangled with my broken RS #45 and oiled the ends (fairly heavy by accident). The Ramones blared from the stereo in my car as I flew to work...and arrived late. Again.  :-/  After waiting for my hair to finish drying at the office and finally getting my break, I discovered that I'd forgotten to grab a hairtie this morning and therefore, couldn't braid today. And that sux because the lower half of my hair is quite greasy.  :P  A co-worker even asked if my hair was still wet. Blugh. I shall have to mix up a new oil solution soon.

Anyway, I am anxious to get out of here, as I have many errands that need tending to. Tomorrow is Thursday, which means the morning shift for me. Ugh! Hopefully tonight, I'll be able to get some decent rest. haha Right...

Small entry for a simple hair day. Just the usual WCC, detangle & whatever else. The curious thing was the water this morning. Sudden and dramatic fluctuations in extreme temperatures had me adjusting the water (mostly in vain) every few seconds, which extended my shower time quite a bit. Both of my parents reamed me for this, of course. *sigh* And they wonder why I procrastinated moving back home for so long.  >:(

Egads, I just found what seems to be the most freakish hair growing out of my head. Contrary to the rest of my spiderweb strands, this one is coarse, dark and curly.  :o  This may be natural or an effect of my medication. And the curliness could be the result of having been badly stretched. Either way, a frightening discovery.

And on the subject of sinewy strands, I have considered, of late, sending a lock of my hair to my distant sweetheart once it reaches my first short term goal of 2 feet. Since I've known him throughout much of my hair's journey, and as well since he's shared so many of my experiences whilst growing it, I think it might be fitting that he have something to commemorate it also. A small part of my physical self as much as of my achievement. *He* seems to think that it would be romantic. It's an idea, at least.

Many tasks await me when I return home. One of which will be cleaning out my oil bottle again and mixing up a new solution. This one will have aloe vera gel in it. I think it may be in my best interest to experiment with the oil to aloe to water ratios to find a suitable blend for my hair. One that will moisturize the very ends and prevent their splitting, without causing the oil to "climb" up my hair as it commonly does when applied heavily.

Alright, enough of this mindless jargon. Back to work.

Today was another Snowy's Treatment day. My version, of course, consists of 1 tsp. of EVOO, 1 tsp. of aloe vera gel, 1 tsp. of honey and 4 tsp. of Pantene Deep Fortifying Treatment. Before mixing this up, I nuked it for 12 seconds, which I've learned is probably not long enough. Perhaps 13 next time.
   I'll be doing treatments this way until I run out of Ice Shine S&C. I'm trying to find out whether my hair prefers Snowy's Treatments or Pantene treatments by themselves.

So I left this concoction in my hair for an hour after washing twice with Ice Shine shampoo. Then rinsed and followed with Ice Shine and Daily Moisture Renewal conditioners. Detangled as usual with TRESemmé leave-in and my broken RS #45, then sprayed my new oil solution on the ends. I mixed the latter up last night after cleaning the bottle. Now there is far more aloe vera gel than baby oil in it and the other ¾ of the bottle is water. It still needs some tweaking.

My mother woke me up at 7:00 am, announcing through the door that she needed me to "unblanket the horses" again. And rather than saving some time and getting up right away, I laid in bed for an hour in quite a depressive mood.  :P  Not because of the horses or anything.
   It was good to see the boys again. Our rodeo sorrel, Ricky, came to me when I called him and wouldn't stop licking my hand. haha He's like a big dog.

Still haven't managed to get around to all of the little personal maintenance things that need attention. My nails aren't looking so hot lately, but I can't find any of my manicure tools to save my life. Stupid things like that. I've also managed to lose the folder that I often carry with me to write or record certain things so as not to forget them. My dread is that I've left all of these things in my uncle's landscape office and that he'll discover that I've been sneaking in.  :o

Alright, well, not much else to report. Hair is braided as usual...I actually made a semi-decent braid today - don't ask me how! And I'm still anxious to measure on the 1st, which I realize is about 2 weeks away. Oh well.

Peace.

Standing in the shadows at the end of my bed
                                         -Radiohead, Kid A

Finally another WWCC day. Woo! My roots needed it.

Every day, I'm becoming less and less fond of my TRESemmé leave-in conditioner spray. I like that it's oil-free and has the scent of old-fashioned roses, but it doesn't detangle worth a deuce! When I go back to Target for new hair stuff, I'll be sure to pick up some Pantene Detangle Light Spray Conditioner, and use the TRESemmé to lightly mist the top half of my hair. That part never gets touched when it's wet anyway because I only detangle from about the ears down.

Yesterday was a "naughty" hair day.  :-[  I didn't oil the ends, and actually used a blowfryer!!!  :o  Yes, I used the low, cool settings and my hair was about 97% dry beforehand, so it was pretty much just to finish, add body and smooth out the frizzies. My hair behaved quite well afterward and I left it down all day, even though I was wearing a hooded shirt...and even though it was a windy day. I know these decisions will come back to haunt me.  :-/

Today, I forgot to throw a hairtie in my purse before leaving for work, so I can't make a braid. But no blowfryer today and I did oil the ends. My oil solution seems to be diluted enough to where it will absorb into my hair. I'm still unsure about the oil-aloe-water ratios. Oh! Another thing I'm almost out of - aloe vera gel! I'd better make a shopping list while what I need is still clear in mind.

Alright, I've got: Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal shampoo, conditioner and treatment; Pantene Detangle Light Spray Conditioner; distilled white vinegar; and pure aloe vera gel. Anything else?

Oh yes, and I found all of my manicure tools over the weekend. My nails are now short, smooth and a deep shade of crimson. My folder may have been in the armoire in my bedroom all this time. So my computer-borrowing habit is still a secret. I hope.

As for braiding, I'm getting pretty turned off of it. I can never seem to divide the strands evenly enough and it always seems to come unravelled during the day and get ratty-looking. Perhaps I need to find a better contained style for my spiderweb hair. Like an easy updo or something.

Anyway, my father and his homeless friend are working on the RV whenever they have a spare moment together. All's well on the romance front (except for the distance, of course!). It looks as though I've finally reached Stardust level here! Woohoo!  ;D  And the phones are ringing like crazy, so I'm gonna get going!

Haven't made an entry in a few days as there's not much to report on the hair front. It's been the usual stream of washing, conditioning and treating. Same old song and dance.
   I am still taking vitamin E every day and doing Snowy's Deep Moisture treatments whenever I have time. Most days, I oil the ends. Some days, I don't. Same goes for braiding.

In other news, life's still pretty crazy. I've had the most annoying twitch in my right lower eyelid for over a week now - it's driving me batty. I know it's probably from sheer lack of sleep.
   Still riding through the ups and downs of the romance roller coaster...and getting quite ill in the process. haha I just got to thinking that romance isn't really like a roller coaster at all. It's like the Tower Of Terror...shooting up to the sky and looking down at the world below, then falling one or two stories, then shooting straight up again, then freefalling almost to ground level, shooting back up, dropping back down...and never knowing what's going to happen next. Yeah, that's what it's like.  :P

Work is nuts, too. 'Nuff said there. And my skin is terrible these days thanx to hormones and my own negligence. *sigh* I need a more disciplined schedule. Haven't touched my bass in forever, which sux because I tend to forget everything I've learned the minute I put it down. It's only like that with music. For some reason, I'm terrible at retaining it. It's always been that way.

Anywho, phones are going crazy, so I'm outta here. Peace.

Today has been particularly horrible. One of those Murphy's Law type of days.  :P  And frightfully busy, to mention! I couldn't even list all of the things that I had to address this morning! *sigh* But anyway...

Another Snowy's Treatment this morning for over an hour with the usual ingredients. All of my current hair stuff is nearly gone, so I may run to the store tonight. After a month of using Ice Shine S&C, I have determined that my hair does indeed respond better to Pantene Restoratives. So I'll pick up some Time Renewal products next.  ;)

In other news, both yesterday and last night, I finally slept deeply enough to dream. Pleasantly, even. Both times, I dreamed of my distant sweetheart, who has unfortunately been anything but sweet lately.  >:(  So it was quite disheartening to wake up to the bleak reality after such lovely dreams. *sigh* I'm afraid that things have not been going well for us at all. He's losing faith...and I'm losing patience.

But there's an old mantra that says "accentuate the positive." I have far better things to focus on, like the fact that today is payday! Woohoo!  :D  I'd rather think about (and be grateful for) all of the things that I can afford now. And relish with quiet satisfaction the fact that I've earned everything that I have. I've worked for it.
   If I accentuate the positive aspects of my life, it should be a happier one (I hope). So once again, I'm going to distance myself from the freefall drama and negativity of the "relationship." If he wants me, he'll put forth the effort. But my life is my own.

So don't cry to me
If you loved me
You would be here with me
You want me
Come find me
Make up your mind
             -Evanescence, Call Me When You're Sober

Thata girl!  Look to the good things.  Life is never really as bad you might think when you dwell on the negatives.  Just remember - don't sweat the small stuff, and don't worry about things you have no control over.

True enough, BB.

Let's see...over the weekend, I did one Snowy's Treatment and bought new hair stuff!  :D  Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal shampoo, conditioner and replenishing mask, a huge bottle of DWV and new bottles of Pantene light spray conditioner and aloe vera gel. Huzzah!

Yesterday was a clarifying day, as I didn't get to do one last week. The usual method of 2 Pantene Purity shampoo washes with a DWV rinse in between. Time Renewal conditioner, followed by Ice Shine conditioner...I still have a bit left over.

Today was the usual WCC with Time Renewal S&C and Ice Shine for the final conditioning. Had to use warm water on my hair this morning because that's how it goes when I have to get up early...I end up taking a shower while the sprinklers are running and am stuck with very low pressure water that's either warm, scalding or freezing. I know that cold water is best for hair, but not when it's 50° outside. Sorry.

Anyway, it was much easier to detangle today, having used Pantene leave-in conditioner on the length rather than TRESemmé. The latter is now my "extra" leave-in that I use but don't need. I oiled the ends of my hair just before leaving the house this morning and allowed it to air dry at work. During my break, I braided as usual. All is well.

So it's almost measure day. Only 3 days to go. I still don't know why I'm looking forward to it so much. I'll probably only have grown ¼" anyway.  :(  But maybe I need to get shot down that way so I won't have so much anticipation for next month.
   For a long while, there's been this naive part of me that desperately holds out hope when the odds are stacked against me. That may be what's happening here. Or maybe I'm just curious to see how much my hair has grown since last month. hehe

In other news, my guy and I are getting along quite well. I swear, this is one of the strangest relationships ever. I can never harbour an aversion to him because he's my best friend and no matter what, we always seem to work things out. But still, something doesn't feel quite right. I'm not even sure what it is and I want to just let it go...some things you just have to let go of. But for some reason, my mind won't let me. Like unfinished business or something, which I hate. But still, we're getting along well and I'm glad for that.

While running amok gathering hair supplies this weekend, I also picked up 2 new CD's: Jet's Shine On and The Beatles' Abbey Road. The former reminds me a little of my guy's band and that cracks me up.

Also, I'm working both the morning and afternoon shift today and racking up full-time hours. Possibly overtime.  :D  Why? Well, because my parents spent the weekend in Vegas with my father's family from WA and won't be back until tonight. But I don't mind - please! A weekend all to myself and extra hours on my next paycheck? I think I can handle that.  8-)

Peace, people!

Another early morning.  :P  Typical WCC again, but no funky water action from the sprinklers today, thank goodness. But then, we didn't need to run them. More on that later. I also emptied my bottle of Ice Shine conditioner today. Not sure whether I should finish off my sister's bottle of Smooth & Sleek also. Homeless homeboy used almost all of the matching shampoo and the condioner is just sitting there under the sink being ignored. But I'm really into my Time Renewal stuff right now.

Ok, I've been wondering...WTF is up with my ticker? Yesterday it said 1 month exactly until I reach my short term goal, today it says 1 month, 1 day. Neither are correct. It's 1 month and 2 days! Ahh, technology.

Yesterday after the longest day ever at work, I tried to catch the sunset at La Jolla Cove. It must have been years since I'd done that, so I shut down the office, gathered my things and tried to get out there as soon as I could only to miss the sunset by minutes.  >:(  There were only a few reflected embers remaining on the clouds above which faded shortly after I arrived.
   So I strolled quickly along the sidewalk that edges the cliffs of the CA shoreline, following the fading light and weaving a coastal daisy into my hair. I knew that it was too late, that I'd missed it and suddenly, I was quite ashamed of the language I'd used against the traffic on the way.  :-[
   I ended up watching the daylight die from the Wedding Bowl...that's a little part of the land that's dug out and looks out over the water. It's manmade, well-landscaped and a popular spot for weddings, hence the name. In fact, it was where my childhood best friend was married last year. The whole area is quite a popular hangout for lovers, which made me long for my far-away friend even more than usual.
   Night's shadow had covered everything in sight by the time I left.

So the big story for today? RAIN!!! It actually started at around 8:00 last night and even though I already had half of my pajamas on, I had to run outside and frolic in it.  [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]  Ended up getting wonderfully soaked.
   This morning, everything was covered in a dense fog. You could just barely see the black outline of the leafless, skeleton trees around. Buildings, signs and traffic lights were almost invisible until you were quite close to them. I saw a lady on the sidewalk wearing a cloak and hood and I was at once reminded of a London setting in a classic novel. Very cool.

It started raining a little bit more again shortly after I got to work, but it has subsided. It doesn't look as though it has any intention of stopping completely, however. I hope I didn't just jinx it!  :-X

Anyway, I forgot a hairtie once again, so I'll have to face a frizzy hair day without a braid until I get home. As if I care. hehe Rainy hair is sexy.

Quote:

So the big story for today? RAIN!!! It actually started at around 8:00 last night and even though I already had half of my pajamas on, I had to run outside and frolic in it.    Ended up getting wonderfully soaked.

Isn't playing in the rain a wonderful feeling?!  --No matter how old we get!!   :D

Quote:

Isn't playing in the rain a wonderful feeling?!  --No matter how old we get!!  :D

Too true, Trish. Age has little importance over how something makes you feel.

Ok, seriously...what the deuce is up with my ticker?! Now it's counting upwards for some reason??? I don't get it.  :-?  29 days until first goal length...hopefully.

Anyway, ugh, I am sooo full! I went to McDonald's during my break because I was totally starving and on the verge of a hypoglycemic attack. 15 Chicken McNuggets and an Oreo McFlurry later, I feel like I may explode.  :P  Man, I knew I should have just gotten the Fruit & Yogurt Parfait!

So...yeah...hair. This morning, I washed once with Time Renewal shampoo, treated for an hour with the Time Renewal replenishing mask, then followed with Time Renewal conditioner. My hair treatments now consist of squeezing the water out of my hair with a microfiber towel before putting the treatment in and covering the whole mess with a shower cap.
   Detangled and oiled as usual and today, I've left my hair down. I partially combed through it just before my break when it was dry, but I haven't really seen what it looks like. I can tell that the ends are greased rather heavily because I'm running low on my oil solution and it is more concentrated. Ah well.

For the past 3 days, I've been listening to nothing but the Beatles album, Abbey Road. Not intentionally or anything. I guess I've just been too absent minded to switch the CD's in my car.  ::)

The rain has pretty much stopped. *sigh* And there's nothing else that I really feel like reporting. Peace.

Hooray! It's February!  :D  I don't know why I'm so excited about that, nor why I've been anticipating it for so long. Now I can't wait for it to be March.  :-/

Maybe it has something to do with progress and the idea of moving forward. Maybe it's about putting time between myself and the sorrows of last year; perhaps I'm anxious to enter a new stage of life or something. I really don't understand what the hurry is. Maybe I just can't wait to finally have really long hair! hehehe

It was a strange morning. Started out by waking up at 5 am, getting into the shower and doing a WCC, typical of any Thursday morning. Then, just as I'd gotten out of the shower, my mother knocked on the bathroom door and said that she wanted to work this morning instead. It was a spontaneous decision which she tried to justify with anything that she could come up with and even partially blame me for. Must be the full moon. >:(  Confused and mildly angered at the inconvenience, I let her have her way. I hate working mornings anyway.
   There was no way that I was going back to bed, though I wanted to. When I'm up, I'm up and that's usually it. So I used the extra time to "get things done." I hung out and ate, did laundry, cleaned out my car, actually braided my hair at home for once and talked to my sister about upcoming plans for her birthday. Apparently, we -that is, as many friends and family are available- are going to a fondue place on Saturday night, followed by a club. Her actual birthday is the 6th, so we'll be going out for a "family" dinner that night. Family, of course, meaning my immediate family and a few close family friends. That's just how we roll. If you know us long enough, you become one of us. Like a mini Mafia or something...without so much blackmail, murder, embezzlement, etc. lol

On the romance front, I still have no idea where "we" stand. *sigh* The love is still there, but it's not like it used to be by a long shot. I wish that the faith I once had in our inseparability was still as strong as it used to be. But I am every bit as uncertain now as I was a few months ago when *he* had his last emotional crisis. I could hold onto my faith now as I did then, knowing that everything would turn out alright, but what would be the point? These breakdowns he's having can't keep happening every few months. They break "us" down and we won't survive at this rate.
   Even if our love is strong enough to endure the onslaughts of senseless drama, it shouldn't be tested so often. Neither should my faith, nor my patience. I'm tired of it and I have my limitations. Not because I can't withstand it but because I shouldn't have to. Argh!

Wow, sorry for the rant.  :-[  This has been festering for awhile.

On a happier note, the sky is still heavy with clouds and we apparently even got more rain last night. I do hope that more is on the way. I love it and the city needs it.
   Anyway, work is swamping me right now, so I'd better get going. Late!

Quote:

Even if our love is strong enough to endure the onslaughts of senseless drama, it shouldn't be tested so often. Neither should my faith, nor my patience. I'm tired of it and I have my limitations. Not because I can't withstand it but because I shouldn't have to. Argh!

No, you shouldn't have to.  I don't enjoy roller coasters, especially the emotional ones.  Just remember:  you are in control of your life and it's your decision what direction it takes.  *hugs*

Thanx, Trish. *hugz* Although I think that *he* might benefit from that insight a bit more than I could.

Alright, after accidentally erasing my last entry just as I was finishing it, I thought I'd try another one today.  >:(

The weekend was alright. Saturday night, I went out with my sister and a bunch of her friends to celebrate her birthday, which is actually tomorrow. There were about 11 of us total. We had dinner first at a place called Forever Fondue. Neither my sis nor I nor any of her friends had ever had fondue before (though I had read quite a bit about it), but we figured it out. It was fun to do once for the experience, but not something that any of us would do regularly. It took about 3 hours and the bill totaled almost $300 just for the 5 of us at one fondue pot!!  :o

After that, we rushed downtown to my sister's favourite club and danced away the remainder of the night. Most of the couples in our group ended up fighting and leaving early and most everyone was quite intoxicated, save for my sister and myself.
   A lot of guys asked me to dance, but I turned each and every one of them down. haha My sister and her friends protected me from them for the most part, but a few of them still got a bit familiar, and I'm not cool with being touched, no matter how slightly, by complete strangers.  :P
   I had borrowed a pair of my sister's shoes, and by the end of the night, my feet were screaming and my toes were numb. She was in the same boat, so we ended up leaving the club before it closed. All in all, it was an ok night, though my feet are still badly blistered.  :(

Tomorrow, we're going out for a "family" dinner - that is, my parents, myself, my sister, her bf, one of her friends and that friend's mother. We'll probably end up going someplace like the Corvette Diner or something, so says my sister. Saturday night was pretty disappointing for her, so she's hoping that tomorrow night will be better.

On the romance front, nothing's changed, really. The boy and I are getting along as always (we are best friends, after all), but God only knows when/if he'll make it out this way. I really hope for our sake and for his own that he gets his act together quite soon. I'm certainly not going to wait forever.

Anyway, so...hair. Really not much to report. Still doing the WCC routine every day with Restoratives Time Renewal. Detangling with Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner and my broken RS #45 and oiling the ends.
   Yesterday, I made up a new oil solution where I am now filling ¼ of my oil bottle with aloe vera gel and baby oil with aloe (mostly the aloe vera gel and very little oil) and filling the other ¾ of the bottle with water. It seems to work decently enough, though I need to add either more aloe gel or more water, I'm not sure which. But the ends of my hair are not nearly as greasy as they have been.

Oh yes, and good news at work. We're getting a scanner!!!  :D  As soon as I learn how to work the thing, I'll be able to share all sorts of pix. That may mean hair pix in the future, if I can ever get my camera repaired! Believe it or not, its gears are still crusty from the Fruit Salad Incident of 2002. lol So maybe this year, I'll finally address the issue. Man, talk about procrastinating!  :P  In any case, yeah...scanner...soon. I can't wait!

Nothing else to report, really. I haven't had time to do any sort of treatments yet this week. I've been wondering about alternatives to deep conditioning treatments, to be honest. They do eat up a lot of precious time when I'm able to do them.  :(  So I've been wondering whether it might helpt to leave EVOO in my hair overnight every night and just do deep conditioning treatments when I can. Or perhaps I could use a deep conditioner every day after washing and just leave it on my hair until the end of my shower...then follow with a regular conditioner. Decisions, decisions...  :-/

Also, I've been debating sending a lock of hair to my far-away friend in MI once I hit the 2 foot mark. On one hand, it would be a poignant, romantic gesture, seeing as he's been along for much of my "hair growing" journey. Plus, he'd have a physical token of myself and my affection. On the other, hand, however, it would bond me to him and I'd have no choice but to marry him. I wouldn't want to be with someone else whilst a piece of my hair was still missing from having given it to some other guy. Awkward. *sigh* Decisions indeed...

Angel, try using a good conditioner as a leave-in.  That's what I'm doing this winter.   8-)  

Unfortunately, Trish, I am not troubled by "winter hair" as SoCal does not have legitimate winters. *sigh*

Last night was pretty cool. My family + 3 others went to the Corvette Diner for my sister's birthday dinner. Our waitress tied my sister's hair up with big red straws, which she'd been dreading because she'd just done her hair before we left. But the funky straw 'do was pretty awesome. As for my hair, it was neatly braided. No straws allowed. heh heh  8-)

After eating quite well and sharing a huge dessert, we all went home, where I took out one of my seamless combs and helped recover my sister's hair from the straw 'do. She liked my seamless comb and said it was "nice" on her hair, which for the record, is a dark, sandy brown and layered. I think the longest layer reaches about 26" (I measured her hair once) which is just about BSL on her.
   Anyway, she made my mother put hot rollers in her hair after I combed it to straighten out the kinks left behind from the straw 'do. Meanwhile, I learned what a rain lamp was.

Today is my 2nd day experimenting with deep conditioner in the shower. I wash first with Restoratives Time Renewal shampoo then work the Time Renewal Replenishing mask into the length. Then I pin the whole mess up with a beak clip and leave it in for the rest of my shower. At the end, I rinse it all out, then follow with Time Renewal conditioner. I'm trying to see if I can virtually eliminate the need for weekly deep conditioning treatments or at least rival them with other methods.
   So far, I haven't noticed any difference, but then, it's only been 2 days.

My roots feel excessively polished from the leave-in conditioner/detangler that I've been misting on them. They're also noticeably darker and flatter. So I shall stop doing anything to the roots besides washing them and only detangle from the ears down. A naturally oily scalp needs no assistance.

Yesterday, I oiled and braided. Today, I did neither. I'm feeling pretty uninspired with my hair lately...so it's just hangin' there for now. Of course, it is suuuuper soft and has that luxe liquid gold characteristic that Restoratives gives it, so that's working out fine.
   After I've restored my hair with Time Renewal for a month, I think I shall return to Breakage Defense. I think it just works better for my hair in general, and I may even get the strengthening spray as well.  :)

Also, I added more aloe vera gel to my oil solution, which has just about perfected it. It gets completely absorbed by my hair and is left feeling unbelievably soft. Aloe vera gel has never done much for my skin, but my hair sure seems to love it. Go fig.

I've not clarified in 10 days and don't plan to at least until the end of the month. I want my Time Renewal products to work their magic as much as possible without having to start over all the time. And I'm wondering whether my hair would feel more luxurious if I didn't clarify so often. Guess we'll see.

In other news, the scanner is now in my office, but the IS guy is having some problems hooking it up to my computer. I've been reading the user's manual and trying to learn how to scan things anyway. It's not brain surgery. I'm hoping to have my camera cleaned and restored so I can take hair pix when I reach my first goal...then post them here. *fingers crossed*

Alright, I've rambled long enough. Peace!

3 weeks until my first goal? I can hardly believe it. Years ago, it seemed like I would never reach it and now it's practically upon me.  :)  I wonder just how long I can drag this growing period out before the inevitable trim.

Nothing special to report today. I had the morning shift, so it was the usual WCC with Time Renewal S&C. Still using both Pantene and TRESemmé leave-in conditioners and my broken RS #45 to detangle from the ears down. I also oiled today, but the ends of my hair show no signs of it. Perhaps my solution needs more baby oil...

Well the weather is warming up and I've decided to resume power walking every other night starting in March. It was probably a mistake not to start at the beginning of this month, but now I know better when to start next year. I might devote one week to my arms and abs respectively to firm them up a bit before the more intensive stuff begins.
   Last year, I got very nice results in just a few months from power walking. Not just with weight loss and metabolism, but there was quite a difference in the way I felt health-wise and emotionally.

Anyway, back on the hair subject, it's such a trip to think that I'll not only reach 2 feet this year, but BSL also!  :D  Speaking of which, I'm going to try and make up a new hair chart so I can figure out what kind of growth I'll really be getting.

Hope everyone's having an awesome day!  :)

Hair: Bare minimum today, as I had a very late start. Simple WCC. That's it. No detangling, no combing, just air drying. I wonder how badly the ends would dry out if I just did this all the time.  :-?

Love: After yet another weekend of tears and frustration, I called the boy early this morning, though I'd been awake for hours already, and told him that I just couldn't do it anymore. The emotional roller coaster had become too much to take and I needed to step off of it. For good.
   He neither disagreed with nor blamed me for the decision, as he understood that his actions alone had caused it, but he was deeply wounded...which hurt me in turn. But then something happened that I did not expect. As I was unloading my "I've had it" spiel, we began talking, and again I realized just how difficult it would be to let the guy go. In a sudden stroke of total insanity, I offered him one last chance...and he opted to take it. All I can say is we'll see how/if things go.

Work: Busy as heck today! The phone rings so often that I barely have time to finish the various Human Resources projects lying around my office...in addition to everything else that I normally do here. Oy!

Life: This is probably the scariest part of all. After over 30 years in water distribution and sales, a corporate hostile takeover may be forcing my father out of his job...with nothing to show for all his years of backbreaking service. The other distributors are trying to put together a class action lawsuit against the corporation which bought out their company (and forced relocation). But everyone wonders how this can be done and whether it would really be worth it. My father has already considered stepping out of it completely and following another career path. God help him.
   This puts my mother and sister and I in an awkward and rather desperate place.

The homeless Canadian is still living in his RV on the side of our house. He comes in to use our bathroom for whatever *ahem* purpose he wishes, leaving me to clean up after him.  >:(  It's pretty gross...and why do guys have to shed so much in the shower? Honestly...  :P

Well, it's just about time to start closing up and shutting down. Why does that sound like something my mother would say? Egad.  :-X
   In any case, time to go. Laytah!

Aw, honey...Life is just stepping all over you right now, isn't it?  *hugs*  Keep praying.   :-*

((((((Trish)))))) Will do. Always have, as I am unfortunately more than used to being stepped on.

Hair: Had a little time today, so I did a WWCC. Man, do my showers take a long time when I do that!  :o  I detangled in the usual manner but didn't have time to oil. My hair is neat and braided now. I might try a heavy EVOO overnight treatment tonight...if I have time.

Love: Well, the guy and I have managed to save our pseudo-relationship from utter disaster once again. I'm never sure just how that works out, but I guess the important thing is that it does. Oh, it's still weird and the whole thing feels as if it's sitting on eggshells right now, but it beats not having it there at all. God give us strength.

Life...? This morning, my father pounded on my door and demanded that I start paying a quarter of my income as rent. Fair enough. I understand that they need it and I don't mind helping out. What bothers me a bit is that neither my sister nor homeless homeboy are paying rent. Just me. As punishment for being sooo difficult to keep.  ::)  Unfortunately, this sorta thing is typical of my family. Just one drop in an ocean of examples. But whatever.
   So once again, I can pretty much kiss my much needed dental work and dreams of returning to school goodbye. No one ever said that life would be fair.

Happy Valentine's Day, all!  :D  Feel the love.

One benefit of being my music man's best friend is knowing that his favourite colour is red. That made picking out his Valentine's Day present rather easy. I sent him a big bouquet of blood red overkill.  ;)  A red vase with a dozen red roses and red berries or some type of filler mixed in. I tracked it a few minutes ago and read that it was delivered, but left on the front doorstep. I guess no one was home to receive it.  :(  It's been snowing in MI for days, so I hope the roses don't freeze! God let him find them soon...

Today was another late start as I was on the phone with said MI music man from the moment I woke up until an hour before I had to leave for work. My hair didn't suffer too much, however. It was a simple WCC, both conditionings were rinsed by the tub faucet and finished with the showerhead. This method is more effective, but also more time consuming. *sigh* I have so little time to consume these days...  :-/

Detangled in the usual manner, but didn't oil. Again. I meant to do a heavy EVOO overnight treatment before bed last night, but didn't get around to it.

Having washed every pair of pants that I own this morning, I had to go to work rockin' a skirt with tennis shoes. Great look! lol I ordered a brand new pair of Ariats yesterday, however, so this fashion faux pas should not repeat itself. I'm not even supposed to wear tennis shoes to work anyway.  :P

Yesterday evening, the thing that I'd long feared would happen finally did. After finishing my shift at work, I usually stop over at my uncle's landscape office to use the computers while I wait out rush hour traffic. I used to work in said office, so I have a key, but no one knew that I'd been sneaking in...until yesterday. In the midst of an AIM conversation with my sweetheart, who should walk into the office but my uncle himself?! I was mortified, though not the least bit surprised, and pretended to be briefly looking up something on the computer before flying out of the office. Eeek!
   Mental note: don't go to the other office until after 6:00!  :-[

Anyway, with just 20 minutes left in this particular office, I lose hope in hearing anything from my guy about the roses before I leave. *sigh* Perhaps he'll call me tonight and let me know that he got them...and then, of course, I'll forget to oil my hair again.  ::)

Have a lovely day, all.

What style of Ariat did you order?

Trish: Heritage II Paddock. First pair of English boots I've ever owned. They only have 4LR construction, though, so I'm a little apprehensive. http://www.ariat.com/images/products/small/57305F.jpg

Hair: Yesterday was a simple WCC, as I had the morning shift at work. But I did oil. Today was a WWTC. That is, a double wash, 1 hour treatment, then conditioning. Didn't have time to oil today, nor did I get a break at work, so I didn't braid my hair either.  :(  All I've done is comb it and leave it be. It's not in too much danger, I guess. Tonight, I must do the overnight EVOO treatment. No more excuses!

So...a lucky 13 days until first goal length, eh? We shall see if my hair can live up to such demands. I have my doubts...

In Other News: Well the scanner at work is hooked up and works quite well. I've just sent tons of pix to my sweetheart in MI...so if they go through, I'm an overnight success in learning to use the thing properly. If that is the case, then I have only to get my camera repaired before I can become a hair pic posting nut like so many others here.  ;D

My beloved received his Valentine roses and absolutely loves them. They didn't freeze to death! Phew! A few of the leaves fell off and his cats tried to eat them. They're actually trying to eat the entire arrangement.  :o  He does have some bizarre pets.

Well, I guess that's about it for now. Hope everyone has a rawkin' weekend. Peace!

Glad your flowers made it!  The cat's may be bizarre but, I've always found men that choose cats as pets are very sweet.

I love those boots!  Since my late teens, I've consistantly owned pairs of similar looking boots until now.  I pretty much wore my last pair out about a year ago, and I'm looking for a new ones.  I've never heard of Ariat, I need to check them out.

Gorgeous boots, I love them.  They appear simple yet rich and supple.   :)  

Trish: Yup, I dig 'em. They're pretty similar to Victorian boots, which I wear quite often, although far more comfortable! I hope they get here soon...

La Diosa: Ariat is the best brand out there. Bar none. They're well known among people who have horses, so I'm very lucky to have been introduced to them. Every pair that I've owned have been more comfortable than my tennis shoes and last a lot longer, too!

Hair: So for the past 2 nights in a row, I've done the heavy EVOO treatment before bed...and my skin is now horrifically broken out.  :o  :'(  Last night, I tried putting my hair into a satin slumber cap so the oil didn't get onto my pillowcase, but even that didn't help. After several hours of tucking, pulling, pinching, slipping and readjusting, I pulled the bloody thing off and slept without it!  >:(  What a waste of $1.50.  :P  By the way, does anyone know whether you're supposed to wear them with your ears on the inside or on the outside of the cap?
   In any case, it looks as if overnight oilings are not in my future. The only good news, I suppose, is that the EVOO comes completely out of my hair after just one washing...even when my shampoo is diluted, as it is right now. Another stupid "hair mistake" that I made this weekend.

Lately, I have been rethinking the whole oil thing entirely and am wondering if there isn't something else out there that will just as effectively moisturize the ends of my hair. I have never been completely comfortable with using oil for a wealth of different reasons, and I wonder if it would be naive of me to believe that there might be another product out there, natural or not, that could work just as well. I may have to do some experimenting.  :-?

Today was a simple WCC. Detangled the length and oiled the ends as usual. It's raining today  :D  so rather than face the frizzy "rain hair" that never dries, I pinned my hair into a double bun updo while it was still damp. Ended up getting a compliment on it from my mother when I arrived at work.  :)  She loves when I wear my hair up.
   This particular style is almost easier than braiding for whatever reason, and much more elegant. Plus, it prevents my hair from dragging along my back, which messes up my braids. Oh yes, and I can wear the black rose barrettes that I made with this style if I wish.  ;)

Other: Only got about 2 hours' sleep last night, as I was up on the phone with *him* until dawn. My parents were already awake before I'd gotten to sleep. And when I woke up, I overheard my father talking trash about me with his homeless friend again. *sigh* It still hurts every time, even if you're totally used to that sort of thing.

On a more positive note, IT'S RAINING!!!  :D  I know, I've already said that, but the excitement of it never goes away. My favourite kind of weather.  :)  I like being able to smile whenever I look out of the window...and know that I'm not going to melt into the pavement when I step outside.

Anyway, the Area Vice President is in the office today, so I'd better post this and get back to work. hehe Happy freaking Monday, all.

Hair: WWCC today. I've learned (again) that diluting my shampoo is a bad idea. Tonight, I must pick up another Time Renewal conditioner, as I ran out of it this morning while I have another full bottle of shampoo sitting in my armoire, waiting for a mate. Thankfully, I have a coupon for $1.50 off of any Pantene Restoratives product. Huzzah!

Detangled with both Pantene and TRESemmé leave-in spray conditioners as I usually do. But today I used aloe vera gel instead of oil, and now the ends of my hair are starchy and sticking to each other as they would with ordinary hair gel. Blegh.  :P
   Now, I cannot wait for my break here at the office so I can dash into the ladies' room to either braid my hair or put it up in the double bun 'do that I wore yesterday.

Oh yes, I forgot to mention that over the weekend, I bought a pack of plastic "sectioning" clips made by Goody. The idea was to replace the plastic beak clip that I'd been using for the past several years to pin my hair up in the shower to let the conditioner soak in while I tend to my other shower duties.
   Upon opening the pack and looking them over, I was very pleasantly surprised to find how "hair safe" they are! No rough edges, harsh seams, teeth or anything of the sort. Needless to say, that beak clip is now history. And good riddance! My former husband bought it for me years ago, while we were still married. After we divorced, I began a desperate search for a worthy replacement. Er, for the beak clip, not the husband. lol Now I have 6 new sectioning clips which will be far more gentle on my hair (not to mention my mind, because I bought them). The one and only objection that I have to them is that they aren't as easy to open, especially one-handed, as my beak clip was.

So 9 days until my 1st goal, eh? Now we're finally down to the single digits. I've been trying to ignore my curiosity and not measure until the 1st of March. I don't know why...I guess I feel like that would be cheating?

Other: My new Ariats arrived today. They fit like a dream, as usual, but next time, I will definitely be ordering Cobalt level instead of 4LR. You can't put a price on comfort, I guess.
   The laces on them are very thin, stiff and leathery, and they come untied quite easily. The boots themselves are new and rigid, so it will take awhile to break them in. Otherwise, can't complain. They look sharp.  8-)

Last night, I finally managed to get to bed at a decent hour. And by decent, I mean midnight.  ::)  But I didn't even wake up until 8:00! That never happens. But I was very tired, and my guy understands that we both need to get on a healthier schedule.

My skin is recovering well from the nightmarish EVOO incident. I've been using my peel-off masque every night since and am trying to stay on top of things with a good routine. I've also washed all of my pillowcases as well as all of my seamless combs and am slowly but surely cleaning everything that came in contact with the EVOO.

Alright, enough for now. Peace.

Today was a clarifying day. Finally. After weeks of letting it go, I have learned that my hair does respond better if I clarify weekly. I like how my hair feels and smells after clarifying, too. Fresh and clean. New start.

Lately, I've been flirting with the idea of trying out the new Herbal Essences.  :o  Somebody please change my mind, and fast!

I've also been coming around to the idea of using an oil solution again. Just on the very ends of my hair. No heavy treatments or anything like that. At least, not just yet. Oh man, what's happening to me?  :P
   Well, I'm in no rush, of course. I'd still like to find an alternative to oiling, if there is one.

In any case, no leave-in's today. Just a smooth, simple braid in really clean hair.

Last night, I picked up another bottle of Time Renewal conditioner and brought it home to realize that I do not, in fact, already have a bottle of the matching shampoo. Guess I'll just have to pair the conditioner with the remaining bottle of diluted Time Renewal shampoo that I'm trying to finish off.
   After that, it will be a matter of deciding whether to get more Pantene Restoratives or Herbal Essences.  :P

The power died in the back part of the house last night while I was asleep. I woke up in the middle of the night and thought it strange that I couldn't see the glowing red numbers of my alarm clock. At that point, I knew that the power had gone out and wondered how I would wake up on time without my alarm clock, as I still had a few hours of sleep left. I decided to chance it...and woke up 40 minutes late, which sux, but I'm lucky that it wasn't later!

By the light of my cell phone, I gathered my "shower stuff" and found my way to the bathroom, then proceeded to take a shower in the dark. That was interesting. It became easier after dawn broke. Once back in my bedchamber, I drew back one of the curtains, opened the blinds and dressed by the pale light that came through my window. After quickly spraying and combing through my hair, I grabbed my purse and raced off to Jamba Juice, as there wasn't time for breakfast at home, and then on to work, where I ended up clocking in 1 minute late.  >:(

In all of my rushing to get ready this morning, my hair doesn't seem to have suffered much for it. Though, before my shower, I whipped my seamless comb through my hair without finger combing first. My pace was pretty frantic, whether the task was combing, washing, detangling, what have you. So I'm surprised not to have suffered more breakage than I did...these poor little spiderweb tresses don't respond well to much trauma.

On a good note, I have more or less gotten used to using my new sectioning clip one-handed in the shower. I imagine it being far nicer on my hair than my old beak clip. Plus, it isn't rusted out or encrusted with old conditioner residue.  :P  And...I have 5 more! In different colours, even! hehe The one I'm using right now is a shiny black, but the pack also came with matte black, 2 "frosted" clear and 2 tortoise shell pattern. All very nice. They should last forever.  8-)

After some consideration, I have more or less decided to get another bottle each of Restoratives Time Renewal S&C. I should run out of them, along with the conditioner that I just bought, at about the same time. Then I'll go back to Breakage Defense. Herbal Essences can kiss my gritz.  ;)

Still not sure what to make of the whole oil situation. heh To oil or not to oil, that is the question. My hair certainly looks and feels better without it, and my skin could certainly do without it...as could my bathroom floor.  :P  I find myself questioning its supposed benefits, as the ends of my hair still seemed dry when I used it.
   Then again, I certainly don't want them to dry out even more. I only get trims once every 9 months now (my scissor lady likes to hack off 1½" at a time  :o), so the ends must have good care in between.

On the subject of trims, it would be best to take off the usual ½" every 6 months, but I can't find anyone who is willing to do so. And even if I did, they would be far beyond my budget. *sigh* Local stylists would try to convince me that my hair must be short, coloured, highlighted, lowlighted and sculpted into "perfection." Plus, they charge a bloody limb and your firstborn child to do so. Thus, I fear and avoid them.
   The lady who does my trims is a bit scissor happy, so I have to see her less often to compensate. But she only charges $5. This is exactly my sort  of luck.  ::)

Finally, I have calculated that if I put away $5 every month, I would be able to afford a pair of custom LL Hairstix in under 2 years. hehe We shall see...

Ah yes...and just 1 week until I reach my 1st hair goal. Can it be?

Two things:
(1)  Yay-rah for you that you came to your senses and snubbed the ever alluring Herbal Essence products.   ;D

(2)  You were speaking of the scissor-happy lady who trims your hair.  --What about trying a barber instead?  When it comes time for me to get my ends trimmed for the first time (who knows when?), I'm seriously thinking I'll have hubby's barber do the deed.  He was the one who shaved my head for the cancer thing and I kind of trust him more than those gals at the fancy-schmancy salons.  Just a thought.  *hugs*

Trish: A barber? What a novel idea! I may indeed have to try that, depending on cost. I'm a little apprehensive about just who would be working on my hair, but it might be worth a shot.

Haven't posted in a few days. Heck, I haven't even been here in a few days. For one reason or another, I just haven't felt up to it. Things haven't been going well in all different areas of life, and anxiety and depression have been finding their way in. I'm dealing, though. No choice.

So anyway, here it is. Last day of the month. Tomorrow is not only measure day, but also when I begin power walking again. How fun.
   This past weekend, I cheated a little bit and measured early. Curiosity got the better of me, and I figured that it's my hair and I have a right to know how long it is at any given time. So I measured. hehehe And it's right about at 24."  ;D  The first person to whom I relayed the good news was, of course, my far-away friend. I told him that I'd more or less decided to send him a lock of my hair once it reaches an official measurement of 2 feet. *He* then told me that he'd considered sending me some of his after getting it cut this weekend. Awww...  ;)

What else? What else...? I've been using oil again. Just on the ends for during the day. And I seem to be getting the hang of heavy EVOO treatments at night. Apparently, you're supposed to sleep with your ears inside the sleep cap. Good to know.
   Yesterday was a clarifying day. I've decided to make Tuesdays my official clarifying days because that's the first day of the week that I have to myself. My father stays home on Mondays, so my showers must be as quick and simple as possible to avoid drama.

So, right, I'm supposed to reach 2 feet tomorrow. I wonder what the tickers look like when you reach the day of your event. Guess I'll find out tomorrow. I'm really hoping for a legitimate, official measurement of 24." No approximations. We shall see whether it falls right on the mark... tomorrow.

Bye for now.

I'm not sure whether I'll have access to a computer tonight, so I figured I would just make an entry now.

As yet, I have not been able to get an official measurement for March. The 1st fell on a Thursday, when my early morning consists of waking up, showering and throwing myself together (barely) before rushing off to work. I'll measure when I get home, but it may be tomorrow before I'm able to report back. Such is life.

Right now, it sucks not yet knowing whether I've reached my goal. The suspense is killing me...kind of. I have taken down my ticker anyway. Apparently, when your event is reached, it starts counting forward how many days since the event. How silly. And "0 days since I reach 24 inches" wasn't proper English anyway, so...away it went.  ;D  I may have to update my sig tomorrow.

Official measurement or not, my hair is finally starting to feel "long" again. Actually, it has felt that way for awhile already. I have to pull it over my right shoulder when I drive because it feels strange when pressed between my back and the seat.
   Pantene Restoratives is also making my hair feel smoother than it ever has in its life. I'll be returning to the Breakage Defense line after my Time Renewal S&C have run out. I ran out of the 1st bottle of Time Renewal conditioner this morning.

In other news, I have fallen madly in love with Revlon's new limited edition dark collections. My nails are now a wicked dark shade of cobalt blue called Midnight Affair. But I have all of the Dark Pleasures nail colours...save one. I also bought one of the Midnight Swirl lip lustres, one of the Crushed Velvet lip crèmes and I totally have my eye on one of the Just Bitten lip stains. lol Companies usually don't start making stuff this great until the fall! I may need a bigger makeup box.  ;D

More little aspects of life are going to start picking up fairly soon. I don't want to give too much away just yet. But things are looking up.  ;)

More later.

Here's to things looking up--CHEERS!!!   8-)

hehe thanx, Trish.  ;)

Alright, it's official. 2 full feet of sinewy spiderweb strands are mine!  [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]

I measured yesterday after coming home from shopping after work. My trip was lucrative because I brought home 2 new purple shower caps (my last one mysteriously disappeared recently) and the Revlon lip stain that I'd been after.

Also, I have indeed decided to send a lock of hair to my sweetheart in MI. Despite the occasional doubts and drama, I believe we're both in this for the long haul. Plus, he's my best friend of nearly 2 years, so I really don't have a problem sending him a little part of myself. He already has the rest of me.
   I'll just try to ignore the one short section of hair as it grows out.

Anyway, that's about it. Another weekend awaits.

I´ve been using pills to help me go to sleep for three years. I love them (they are lighter then sleepingpills)!!!!I´ve never been able to really sleep deeply and I had a boyfriend that snored like a pig for a hundreds of years.....so I really have a sleep debt for many years.

I started to be able to dream when I had written down my "problem list" for the next day, before I went to bed. The brain then doesn´t have to have five things or more to remember during the night.

and you can sleep like a baby



zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

hehehe fata morgana. Pills aren't really for me as I can barely remember to take the ones that I'm supposed to take during the day as it is.  :P  You might be onto something about writing down a problem list before bed. I might give that a try...

So we're having yet another Santa Ana. Typical SoCal weather.  :P  My hair and skin are drying out considerably. My hair is staticky and my hands are flaking and feel terrible. I did another heavy EVOO treatment last night and I think that was a wise decision with the weather behaving as it is. Lordy, this summer is going to suck!

Today was another simple WCC. I didn't get the chance to deep condition last week, so I'll try for it tomorrow perhaps. Maybe do another heavy EVOO treatment tonight.

As of right now, I'm not really sure what to do about my hair. The problem is that there are short pieces that stick out everywhere and are quite obvious. Even though my hair is quite straight, the short pieces get very frizzy and tend to stay that way until after I've slept on them. I'm not sure whether it's new growth, breakage or both. But it sucks any way you look at it. So, I'm wondering if I may grow to BSL and just maintain that length for awhile while I attempt to grow out the frizzies.

So, Daylight Savings has been extended in the US by a freaking month. I can't even find the words to express my dissatisfaction with that. I may have to rebel and become completely nocturnal. But of course, that would not work while living under my parents' roof. *sigh* Guess I'd better stock up on sunblock...  >:(

Anyway, something frightening happened at work today. A guy who literally looked like a corpse walked into the lobby and, with a terrible stutter, asked if I had a trash. He spoke as if he'd not done so in quite sometime. He had wild hair, awful skin and crazy zombie-like eyes that were badly bloodshot. He wore a suit and looked as though he'd been dead and buried for many years and had just recently crawled out of his own grave. He carried with him a plastic bag of strange particulars that I dared not ask about. I only asked him to repeat his question...and with the same stammer, he asked me again for a trash can...and began passing something through the window, into my office. I had no idea what this particular item was nor what it might contain, so I dared not touch it, but rather held up the trash can from under my desk so he could dispose of the item in question. There seemed to be a very odd smell about it...or was that merely my imagination?
   After that, the undead man left the building and seemed to disappear completely. Many a curious glance into the trash confirms that what the corpse guy threw away resembles a blanket, with a cottony white texture on one side and a pink plastic on the other. But my curiosity is not so great that I would permit myself further examination. I don't even wanna know...but I do hope that the cleaning crew takes care of it as soon as possible.  :P  Man, that was like some kind of nightmare...

Anyway, just thought I'd share that little experience. I hope that the freakish visitor quota for my office has now been fulfilled for this year.

Quote:

A guy who literally looked like a corpse walked into the lobby

Yeesh, it's no wonder you have trouble sleeping at night what with these types of visitors!!  *cringe*  :-?

lol Trish

Happy Hair Day: This morning I actually woke up early enough to do a hair treatment, so I did. First, I washed twice with my Time Renewal shampoo, then pinned my hair up with my sectioning clip whilst finishing the other shower duties. Then, I took my hair down, rinsed it again and squeezed the extra water out of the length with a regular towel. I next applied the Time Renewal Replenishing Mask to the length and left it in for an hour, under a shower cap.
   After rinsing the treatment out, I followed with Time Renewal conditioner and then with a horse conditioner that I'd found in the garage. The latter seemed to work excellently (even though it contains oil)!

Detangled as usual today. I'm still using Pantene and TRESemmé leave-in conditioners for the moment. And today is the 2nd day in a row this week that I've remembered to oil the ends. And of course, my hair was woven into another wonky braid when I got my break at 3:00.

The Necessities: While I was treating my hair, I took care of a few essential things as well...like doing a load of laundry, eating breakfast and spending some quality practice time with my bass.  ;)

My Roots Are Showing? This afternoon, as I was rushing off to work, I couldn't find my sunglasses anywhere. Unhappily figuring that I'd left them in my uncle's office, I drove to work without them. It was a typical white-hot SoCal day so everything to me was one big, painful blur of blinding light. When I arrived at the office and picked my purse up off of the seat next to me, there were my sunglasses. They'd been sitting in my passenger seat the whole time.  :P

Anyway, it's just about time to head out of here. Peace and love, all.

On Monday, I completely forgot about power walking, and didn't. So I had to make up for it last night. And I'm walking tonight.

Today was an interesting hair day. I did a WCCC. The first 2 conditionings were with my Restoratives Time Renewal conditioner. The last was with the horse conditioner that I found yesterday. It seems to work alright. I don't mind using it if my family doesn't need it.

I detangled and oiled the ends as I normally do, but didn't get to braid my hair, as I didn't get a break at work. It's cool, though. I don't mind leaving my hair down once in awhile. That's why I'm growing it long.

Also, I did another overnight heavy EVOO treatment last night, wearing my satin sleep cap. I'm getting the hang of it, but I wish the elastic would loosen up faster. It's always pulling on the bottom of my ears or trying to slip off of my forehead.  :P

Looking forward to the end of the week. It can't get here soon enough!

wrote on Mar 6^th, 2007 at 7:53pm:

lol Trish My Roots Are Showing? This afternoon, as I was rushing off to work, I couldn't find my sunglasses anywhere. Unhappily figuring that I'd left them in my uncle's office, I drove to work without them. It was a typical white-hot SoCal day so everything to me was one big, painful blur of blinding light. When I arrived at the office and picked my purse up off of the seat next to me, there were my sunglasses. They'd been sitting in my passenger seat the whole time.  :P

LOL! ;D  Don't worry about it, things like that happen to the best of us sometimes. ;)

hehehe La Diosa.  ;)

*sigh* So...I did it. No turning back now.

Yesterday, I washed and detangled using my usual methods, but purposely neglected oiling the ends. This was the day, you see, that I'd decided to sever a lock of my spiderweb hair and get it ready to send out to my long-distance lover. I didn't want the ends to be greasy for this reason.
   After my morning shift was over, I hit Target on the way home to pick up some new hair stuff, as my Time Renewal S&C were finally almost gone. I ended up getting Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense S&C, the Detangling Leave-In Crème and Strengthening Spray.
   I also went a little nuts and bought 2 CD's (Tool's 10,000 Days and the special edition of Michael Jackson's Off The Wall) and 3 DVD's (Peter Pan, Cinderella and The Little Mermaid, all platinum editions).

Anyway, I got home, set my new stuff down and gathered a few mirrors, a comb, a brush and a sectioning clip and headed into the bathroom. I arranged the mirrors on one of the shelves on the wall so I would be able to see the back of my head in the bathroom mirror. Then I carefully gathered a top section of my hair and pinned it out of the way. Then, I gathered a small section of hair underneath the one I'd just pinned up. This one was right about in the middle of my head...and I took up a brand new pair of scissors...and cut the section free!
   I bound the severed ends with a rubber band and covered it with a black satin ribbon, which was wound around and hot glued in place. I then used the same ribbon to make a bow with long ends, and hot glued that on as well. Then, beneath the middle of the bow, I sewed on a pewter skull charm and then went to work trimming and "dusting" the lock for æsthetics.
   In the process, I realized a little something about the way hair grows. The scalp is constantly regenerating, shedding old hairs and growing new, so the notion of having all one-length hair is impossible. There are always going to be hairs of different lengths all over your head at any given time.
   I also realized that "dusting" my hair all over would be pretty pointless. It didn't fix all of the little ends sticking out everywhere on the severed lock...only made them shorter. So I'll leave the frizzy ends on the rest of my hair alone. Just let them grow out in peace.

As for the top section of my hair that was pinned up, I took it down after binding the lock. I combed and even brushed the rest of my hair out to smooth it and you can't tell at all that I'm missing a small section in the back. Mission accomplished.  :)

Anyway, I laid out the decorated lock on a towel in my room, along with the pressed black pansies that I would also send to my far-away friend the next day. I'd found the latter of which in the planters at one of the local malls at night and they looked so rich and velvety, I just had to take them home and press them for *him.* And *he* swears that he isn't sick of me sending him things yet. haha

Also, I forgot to add that I had terrible anxiety about cutting the lock. I literally felt ill and faint...and I shrieked like a little girl when I did it. There is most definitely an energy in your hair, and it's impossible for a person with long hair to cut it off at the scalp without some stir of emotion. It affects you not just emotionally, but physically, mentally and psychologically as well. All day long, I'd been dreading doing it. I had my doubts, second thoughts and all that good stuff.  :P
   But ultimately, I knew that I would still go through with it. I guess that despite all of my worry on the surface, there was a deeper part of me that knew and trusted that I was doing the right thing. And I followed it.

Today, I did a WWCC and detangled...and oiled the ends. And my hair was braided during my break as usual. Though I've not been able to resist occasionally touching the short pieces underneath where the lock was severed. The short section has been on my mind constantly ever since. I'll probably get used to it.

Once at work, I wrapped up the strand of my hair and the black pansies, placed them all in an envelope and sent them on their merry way. I hope and pray that they reach *his* hands in one piece. And I have to admit, it's a strange/cool feeling to know that he'll soon be holding the piece of my hair that's been with me for so long. I let it catch its last California breezes as I was shopping yesterday. And soon, it will be over 2,000 miles away, in the frigid air of Michigan. God speed.

Angel, I think you sending a lock of hair to your man is so very cool!  Romantic, old fashioned and yet timeless, all at once.   :)

Aww, thanx, Trish!  ;D  I really hope that *he* thinks it's cool, too.  
   The short pieces in the back of my scalp aren't on my mind as much anymore, and I'm pretty well recovered from the shock. My hair feels pretty natural in its entirety, and to look at it, you would never know that a strand was missing. Sometimes, I still run my fingers up to touch the short pieces, but otherwise, I barely pay them any mind. They'll grow out and catch up to the rest eventually. lol And I told my far-away friend that we're bound to each other at least until then.  ;)

Speaking of the boy, I blew off walking last night to sit and talk with him. We still talk every day, but it's been tougher of late as I've been without a cell phone.  :(  Of course, that problem will be solved in a few days. I've already ordered my own brand new RAZR phone, plan and accessories with freebies and rebates attached. And it will cost me less than half of what I was paying to stay on my father's plan. Ha! I'll have unlimited everything, so it will be much easier to stay in touch with my MI music man...every waking second. hehehe
   We're both still hoping that he'll be able to visit soon. The whole long-distance part is a terrible inconvenience a royal pain in the keister to put it mildly. But *he* says he's certain that it will work out.
   
Alright...HAIR. Over the weekend, my spiderweb strands endured some serious trauma. I was out of Time Renewal shampoo and didn't want to get into my Breakage Defense products yet, so I used my sister's Shine Seduction S&C from Victoria's Secret, which smell lovely, but are cone-free and dried my hair out considerably. And oh, the tangles after it dried...  >:(  Even though I'd used 2 detangling leave-ins and oiled the ends, my hair was still dry as a haystack. Ugh!

Wow...I just heard 3 Libras by A Perfect Circle on the radio. heh Man, does that take me back...

Right. Sunday, I didn't wash at all.  :o  Just lots of rinsing, then ran the last of my sister's Pantene Smooth & Sleek conditioner through my hair...and finished with lots more rinsing. Cool water all the way. My skin didn't like it, but I couldn't clarify like I needed to since my parents were home and I didn't really even have time to wash.
   After my hair air dried (no detangling), I took my EVOO bottle and dry oiled the length rather heavily, by accident, but it didn't matter because I ended up weaving it all into a braid anyway. hehe With all of this oiling and not washing, I was beginning to feel like a true longhair. lol Or maybe just a dirty hippie.  :P

Anyway, today I had no choice but to use my Breakage Defense S&C. My father was home, so I couldn't clarify. Again.  >:(  Whatever. Good news is, we got a new showerhead for the bathroom that my sister and I (and homeless homeboy) share. I suppose it's an improvement over the old one, but it's not perfect. It has several different settings on it...so I suppose I'll have to get used to at least one of them.

At the moment, my hair is down and waiting to be braided, though my break isn't for another hour yet.

In other news, the carpets in my parents' house are being professionally cleaned today, the phone is ringing off the bloody hook at work and I'll be walking tonight and tomorrow night. Things will be easier in a few days. Ciao!

HAAAAAAALLELUJAH!!! Clarifying day. Man, did I need it! My delicate strands have been purged of evil....and I will never use that Victoria's Secret S&C again! For today I realized that it had also dried out my scalp, so I've had to deal with the consequent flakes.  :P  I may have to do a scalp massage tonight to get rid of them.

Also, after only 2 days, I officially hate the new showerhead in my bathroom.  >:(  Of all of its fancy settings, there isn't one that I like. I want the new one that my parents have in their bathroom. Grrrrr....

Lately, I've been toying with the idea of not detangling anymore while my hair is wet. Granted, the lack of leave-in's would leave my hair vulnerable and prone to static. Perhaps I could find a leave-in that I could apply by hand. The idea is to skip the wet combing part altogether. Not sure how that would work out, but I may give it a shot for about 6 months or so, just to see if I notice any difference.

Man, can you believe that March is already almost half over? Crimeny! It will be Christmas again before we know it...  [smiley=cheesy.gif]

My grandfather (now my only living grandparent) will be arriving from WA either today or tomorrow and staying through my father's birthday on the 17th. Assorted other members of the family will be coming along. I'm not sure what all we'll be doing, but it's bound to be a good time, whatever it is. I only wish that when my grandfather returns to WA that I could go with him. I'm sooo sick of SoCal, it ain't funny.  :P

No word yet on whether my new phone has arrived at the house, nor whether my last little gifts for *the boy* have arrived in MI. Suppose I'll find out soon enough. heh Is there such a thing as "soon enough" when you're waiting on pins and needles?

Tonight, I'll probably do a heavy EVOO treatment. After the recent ravages to my hair, it could use a drink. And that's about all for now.

Quote:

I only wish that when my grandfather returns to WA that I could go with him.

So...why don't you?!   8-)

Trish: Because all of my obligations are here in SoCal, unfortunately. And with so much riding on me financially at the moment, I cannot take any time off of work.  :(

So today was a veritable "hair day."  :)  I took a shower in my parents' bathroom this morning. haha They have the better showerhead, after all, and if they're going to keep it, then I'm going to use it. And that I did...smiling and laughing wickedly to myself the whole time.
   I washed twice with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo and my hair felt instantly luxe and silky. Then I squeezed the excess water out of my hair with my microfiber towel and applied Restoratives Time Renewal replenishing mask. After leaving that in under a shower cap for an hour, I rinsed and followed with Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner and then with the horse conditioner that I'm still hanging onto. My hair really needed that kind of a moisture boost, and I knew that when it dried, it would probably (hopefully) feel better.

Detangled as usual. My TRESemmé leave-in conditioner was almost gone, so I just emptied the rest of it into my bottle of Pantene leave-in. Which totally reminds me that I forgot to clean my RS #45 comb and rinse out the TRESemmé leave-in bottle and recycle it. Whoops.  :P  But I was in such a blinding rush this morning to get things done...I can't remember everything.  :(

After oiling the ends, I let my hair air dry as usual. Now it's braided and behaving. Seems a bit better off today.

I didn't get a chance to do a heavy EVOO last night, as once again, I got home way too late. I'll probably do it tonight, as my hair still needs it. It feels pretty replenished now, but it could still benefit from an EVOO slumber.

Also, I must go to Target tonight and buy another Conair seamless comb. The one that I'd been keeping in my "hair drawer" at home has mysteriously disappeared.

In other news, my new RAZR phone is on its way. It's currently in Oakland, CA, so I'm not sure whether it will arrive later today or tomorrow. Either way, I'm stoked and can't wait to get it! Soon, I'll be talking and texting to my heart's content...and no one can say a darn thing about it. Well, they can, but I won't listen.  ::)

My long-distance sweetie received the things I sent him, too. And they arrived intact. Huzzah! He really dug the black pansies that I pressed for him, and he loved the little skull charm on the lock of my hair that I sent him. Our hair is very similar in nature, though he says that mine is "a little bit darker and a whole lot better-kept."  ;D

Anyway, I'm off now to plan my evening. Morning shift awaits...oh goody.  :-/

No, dearheart, have you considered *moving* to WA where your grandfather lives?  --not just visiting...  :)  

Ahh, Trisha. "Considered" would be a grave understatement. Moving to WA has been a lifelong dream of mine. But even the dreams that we've always carried with us can be interrupted by "life."  :P

Last night, I was finally able to do the overnight heavy EVOO treatment. I was desperately tired and went to bed at around 10:30. But with the infernal sleep cap, I was waking up every couple of hours.  >:(
   For the past few days, I've been so tired that I could've dropped dead at any minute. My body wants to keep nodding off, whether I'm at work, online or even driving.  :o  I need to get some sleep soon, but the daily obligations won't permit it. Not an inch of leeway. Quite typical.

Today, I must go straight home from work to finish my laundry. Hopefully, I'll get that done before the 'rents get home. Then, it will be time for my power walk, after which I'll wash up for bed. After that, I'll either head up to my uncle's office to score some chatting time with my guy or go with my family to do something with...well, my other family who is here from WA. *sigh* No breaks. Really, I'm used to this.  :P

In the midst of all of my running around,  I suppose it might be helpful to eat something.  :-/  heh We'll see...

Haven't heard from my sweetie all morning. I'm really hoping that he's already hot on the job search rather than sleeping half the day away, as usual. *sigh* Don't say anything there...I already know.

So in addition to the overnight EVOO, this morning, I washed once with Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo, conditioned the length with the like conditioner, then conditioned half of the length with the Cabellina horse conditioner that I've taken possession of.
   Detangled as usual (it's nice having just one bottle of leave-in conditioner to worry about) and oiled the ends. Oh drat, I just realized that I forgot to use my other Breakage Defense products. Zut alors...well, it might help if I actually took them out of the armoire in my bedroom and put them in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. That way, I could see them every morning, and if I could see them, I'd use them. Probably.  ::)

Anywho, hair is down and completely dry now. Thanx again to Pantene Restoratives, it has also been returned its luxe liquid gold properties. Now all it needs to do is just keep growing.
   At this point, I'm not sure whether I'll stay at 24" for awhile or continue to BSL. The ends of my hair could really use a trim, though that would probably mean needing another in 6 months...which would total 2 trims in a year. Typically, that wouldn't be a bad thing, except, as I've mentioned, my scissor lady likes to take off about 1½" at a time.  :o  Not condusive to the whole growing it out thing. If I did it that way, I wouldn't make BSL by the end of this year.  :(  Not sure what to do.

Anyway, it's almost time for my break, so I'll catch y'all later.

Argh! My poor hair!  :'(

After using every setting on the new showerhead this morning, I've reached the determination that none of them work well on my hair...or anything else for that matter!  >:(
   What I was attempting to do was a WWCC, but the water settings either blasted every living ounce of conditioner out of my hair or didn't rinse it out well at all. So I finished my shower with poorly conditioned hair, which feels strange.  :(

Figuring that I would compensate with leave-in conditioner/detangler, I sprayed and combed as usual. But again, I forgot to use my Breakage Defense strengthening spray and leave-in crème. Grrrrrrrrr! In any case, my hair was sopping wet with leave-in conditioner, so I squeezed the length with a towel after detangling. The strange, dried-out feeling endured.  :(

Of course, I also didn't have time to oil the ends today, so I just let my hair air dry. When my break came at 3:00, I gratefully escaped the madness at my desk and rushed to a restroom to braid my hair. Only when I'd finished did I realize that I didn't have a hairtie with me.  >:(  So upon returning from my break, I twisted my hair into a bun as a last resort and stuck a pencil through it like a hairstick. There.

Tonight I may apply a heavy dose of EVOO to my tortured tresses and put them under a sleep cap for overnight. See if tomorrow brings a better hair day.  >:(

In other news, as I was finishing up my morning shift yesterday, my mother told me that I'd gotten a package in the mail! So I rushed home to find it waiting on my bed. I grabbed a pair of scissors, tore it open and found...the charger for my new phone.
   Yeah. Not the phone itself, not even its protective case - just the charger! I guessed that the company was planning to send my order in 3 separate shipments...one piece at a time. And this afternoon, I discovered that that was exactly what they were planning to do. Today, they've shipped my phone. Lord knows when they'll finally get its shell in stock. Whew - thank God for free shipping!  :P

My grandfather, his sister and her husband arrived from WA yesterday, and I actually had time to put my face on before they got to our house. Grandpa even said that I looked beautiful. *blush* They, my parents and I then went to dinner at the Olive Garden not far from my parents' house. Sitting between my father & grandfather was interesting...especially when they started fighting over the bill.  :P

Homeless homeboy seems to have disappeared for the moment. I guess my father told him to make himself scarce while his family was in town. Although his RV was parked in front of our house this afternoon. Hmmm...
   In the meantime, though, I realized that he won't be using our shower for awhile, so I cleaned it before getting into it this morning. Nice to know that it will actually stay that way for a few days!

Anyway, it's about time for me to get out of here and find some dinner. Bon weekend, tout le monde!

Alright. Saturday night was my father's b-day. I had enough time, surprisingly, to put my face on before we left for dinner. Actually, I wore makup for 3 days straight up until today.  :o  With my relatives here, the pressure is always on.
   We went to a local fish restaurant, and at the end of dinner, the staff brought out a guitar-shaped cake with chocolate music notes everywhere...candles on top and an airbrushed message wishing my dad a happy birthday. It turned out to be a carrot cake that my father's cousin had made from scratch. Very cute! I wish I had a picture of it to post here.

Anyway, after dinner, the lot of us (12 total, I believe) went to the bar where my father's band was playing that night. Mother and I and a family friend blew up balloons with a helium tank from work, then I carried all of them in and we tied them to things in the area where we would all be sitting.
   It was a good time. All of us talking, laughing, dancing...the band sounded great. Especially the lead guitarist and keyboard player, who attributed their musical magic to the fact that I was there that night (they both have raging crushes on me).  :P  They said that I was their inspiration...and I muttered something under my breath about "liquid inspiration," being that we were in a bar.  ::)

In any case, it was fun. I really don't remember the last time I danced before that. And at the end of it, we all helped the band unplug and tear down...in record time. After exchanging hugs and handshakes among my family and the band, we all went our separate ways.

Sunday morning, I'd been absolutely fed up with the new showerhead in my bathroom, so I took a bath instead. Not sure how clean I really got, but it was interesting. Floating my colourful can of shave gel in the tub and watching my hair sprawl out underwater like a mermaid reminded me a bit of bathtimes as a kid.  ::)

Rather than spraying and combing my hair while it was wet, I simply ran Restoratives Breakage Defense leave-in crème through the length and let it air dry. Thus, I also learned that the Breakage Defense leave-in crème does my hair no favours whatsoever. My hair stuck to itself and felt gummy. So there's $4 down the tubes.  :P

I also finally made it to Target in hopes of replacing my missing Conair seamless comb. And discovered that Target either no longer carries them or Conair no longer makes them or both.  :(  So I'm sunk unless my other seamless comb happens to turn up. Or I manage to find an even better one. *sigh*

What else...? I'm still taking vitamin E every morning, and I'm still walking every other night. I didn't get to walk Saturday night because of my father's birthday, so I had to walk last night. My legs are still sore and I have to walk again tonight. heh I'll get used to it.

My new phone should be here no later than Wednesday. I'm excited...even though they're sending my order in 3 separate shipments! Whatever. So long as I get all of it eventually. My phone, my plan, my business.

Anyway, today was a slightly better hair day. I suppose I'll gradually adapt to the sucky new showerhead. That or throw a screaming fit until it's replaced. hehe
   Another simple WCC today, then wet detangled as usual, this time using my Pantene leave-in spray conditioner and Restoratives Breakage Defense strengthening spray. They both contain castor oil, which I'm not thrilled about...but so long as it stays away from my skin, it shouldn't be too bad.

Now it's time to (say goodbyyyye...to all our companyyy - wait, no) run home, have dinner with the family, walk and see about maybe getting a load of laundry done, as my sheets smell terribly like burnt peanuts or something.  :P  My mother gave me these strange rice and herb-filled items that can be frozen or heated in the microwave...I usually throw them in the microwave for a few minutes and put them in my bed to warm it up (my room naturally maintains the average temperature of a morgue and my parents refuse to run the heater, so I have to compensate. God, I am forever compensating...). Well sometimes the herbs burn when overheated.  :P

So, yeah. See ya.

Hair: Today was a clarifying day. As I first washed with Pantene Purity shampoo, I realized that it didn't lather up as well due to the Breakage Defense strengthening spray that I used yesterday. *sigh* I should just learn to leave well enough alone, shouldn't I? If the Detangle leave-in conditioner and my oil solution are working, why add anything else to the mix? My life certainly doesn't need any further complication.  ::)
   Anyway, after the first wash, I used the DWV rinse that I'd mixed up that morning, followed by another Purity wash. Lots of cool water in between...I used my parents' shower this morning.  ;D
   After working Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner through my hair and rinsing it out, I pinned it up with my sectioning clip and finished my shower. Much faster than yesterday, and with much less frustration being that I didn't have to worry about the showerhead. Theirs suits my needs well enough.

I also didn't have to worry about detangling today. On clarifying days, I just use my microfiber towel and leave my hair be until the air dries it completely.

Just before I left for work, I mixed up a new oil solution for the ends of my hair. Didn't use any today, as I don't oil the ends on clarifying days, but it's nice to have a fresh supply for when I do need it.

As for the length, I have pretty much decided to just keep on growing it. BSL isn't far off, so why not? That's the whole point of being part of these boards, is it not?  ;)

HELLOMOTO: Huzzah! My new RAZR phone arrived today! [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]  I officially have the coolest phone in the family.  8-)  What a thrill it was to open up the box, take everything out and actually see it for the first time! The phone itself is wider and flatter than my last one, but very thin when viewed from the sides. Already, I wonder how the protective shell I bought for it will fit on it. Hmmm...
   The thing reminds me of R2-D2 from Star Wars with all of its little blue lights and funny little sounds. And the keypad is shiny and reflective, like the bottom of a CD. It was fun peeling off the little protective plastic sticker deals, putting in the battery and charging it up. I'd never gotten a brand new phone from scratch before, so I'd never had to go through any of the initial "setting up" stages. hehe
   They say that the new battery needs about 24 hours to charge, so it's at home doing just that. I hid the thing under my bed so that if, on the offhand chance that someone goes into my room, no one will find my new phone. It's MINE!!! hehe In the meantime, I've been sitting at my desk, pouring over the user's manual, learning about every last little feature.  ;)

Burnt Peanuts? Yesterday, I stripped my bed and washed my sheets and my blanket, fluffed up my pillows in the dryer and sprayed them, as well as my mattress pad with disinfectant spray. When my sheets were dry, I put them back on my bed and sprayed them with a body splash from Bath & Body Works. No more burnt peanut smell.  :P  And I don't think I'll be using those bloody rice/herb heat things anymore.
   After returning from my walk and some other "nightly errands," I came home and finished putting my bed back together. My blanket got a body splash treatment as well, so my whole room smelled girly - which is better than burned, I'd say.

Anywho, that's the news so far. With any luck, I'll have more to report soon.

So...at the risk of rehashing what everyone else has already brought up, it's the 1st day of spring. Whoop-de-friggin'-do.  :P  This means that it's time to buy new sunblock and set aside my "summer makeup"...and that I'll have to wait 6 months before the seasons are decent again. *sigh* Until then, I guess I'll just focus on growing my hair out and staying indoors.

But new seasons mean that time is progressing, so what better way to greet this new phase of life than with a stress-free WWCC? I used my parents' shower again this morning, which is actually less comfortable than my own, but their showerhead is far better, as I've mentioned. It really helps things.

Wet detangling now consists of Pantene leave-in spray conditioner, Restoratives Breakage Defense strengthening spray and, of course, my broken RS #45 comb. I didn't have the chance to oil today, as my hair dried while I was on the phone with tech support, manually activating my new MotoRAZR.  :P

I need to do some sort of treatment soon. Late nights mean late mornings and I rarely have time to deep condition before work...at least not at often as I'd like. So tonight, I may do a heavy EVOO and deep condition on Friday.

In other news, after some minor setbacks, I finally got my new phone working.  :D  Oh, I haven't actually customized any of its settings or used it for anything yet, but it's nice to know that I can. When I get home tonight, I might finally begin programming numbers into it and really making it "mine." And who knows? Tonight, my far-away sweetheart may get the call that he's been hoping for for days.  ;)

Good News: Used my parents' shower again this morning and did a WTCC. Right. Washed once with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo, squeezed the excess water out with my microfiber towel and then treated for an hour with Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal replenishing mask.
   After rinsing that out, I conditioned with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner and then with the Cabellina horse conditioner.
   
While my conditioning treatment was in, I found my Conair seamless comb that I'd been missing for sometime!!  :D  Then, I washed all of my seamless combs.

Detangled with Pantene's light spray conditioner and Restoratives Breakage Defense strengthening spray...and my broken (but very clean) RS #45. I also oiled the ends today.  :)

This morning, I also went through my "hair drawer" at home, picked out the hair toys that I never use and put them in a Ziploc bag. Then, I organized the rest of my drawer by content, according to how often I use each item.

Oh yes, and I also did the heavy EVOO treatment last night. I think I even woke up less often during the night to adjust my sleep cap.

Bad News: I'd wanted to do "princess hair" today, and brought a pair of metal barrettes to work with me so I could pin the sides of my hair up when it dried.
   Unfortunately, the ends were too greasy to leave down, so I ended up just braiding as usual. Thankfully, I'd brought a seamless hairtie along with me as well.

Also, I learned today that my brand new cell phone does not work inside my house. The minute I step through the front door, it looses service.  >:(  WTF?! It also didn't come with AIM Mobile, and I cannot download it to my phone as the model is too new. ARGH!!
   Something has got to give. Either my carrier fixes at least one of those problems pronto or I'll scream until they give me a refund for everything.  >:(

The no-service problem sounds familiar.  Hubby and I don't have cell phones, but my daughter (who lives w/us) does.  We live 10 miles away from a good-size town, but there are no towers out where we are.  The only place daughter can get reception on her phone is sitting on her bed.  --Not outside the house, not anywhere in the house, and not anywhere else in her bedroom.  ONLY while she's sitting/lying on her bed can she get reception!   ;D  

Hair: Doing well. No complaints. Just hangin' in there.

Long-Distance Love: Rock solid. No complaints there either. I'd be an axe murderer without *him.*

Everything Else...  :P  :P  :P  Details to follow.

Alrighty...

On the hair front, all's well. Been doing the usual WCC's, detangling, oiling when I remember, all that jazz. Hair is luxuriously soft & getting longer every day.

Everything's cool with the boy and myself, too, as I mentioned. For not having a steady income (>:(), he's managed to save up quite a bit for his trip out my way. Hopefully it won't be too much longer before he's finally here. Cross your fingers for me, if you would.

As for the bad news, and there is a lot of it, well...

On Friday evening, as I was pulling out of a parking space at the bank, I accidentally backed into someone's fender!  :o  At first, the lady who owned the other car freaked, but she ended up being pretty cool about it. We exchanged info and gave each other a hug. Nothing like that had ever happened in my life, so I was terribly shaken and have been beside myself ever since.
   At first, I was overcome with guilt and felt bad about deriving enjoyment out of anything. I haven't even been able to listen to rock & roll.  :o  The first few days after the accident, it was all classical. Today, I finally branched out into pop. Slowly and cautiously working back to my hard rock roots, I guess. It's weird the way stuff like that will affect you.  :P
   But it was hardly limited to music. I felt tremendous guilt for things like going to dinner with my family, and I stopped shopping altogether, unless absolutely necessary. I don't think I really got much enjoyment out of my hair - everything in that regard had more or less become routine, free from passion. Any little thing, it seemed, that could be perceived as pleasurable...I either denied myself or felt guilty about doing. *sigh* And you best believe that I was driving like a paranoid old geezer.  :P

On Tuesday, I finally called Cricket and cancelled the service, which had been completely useless to me. The past few days have been spent arranging a refund for the products that I purchased through them. I had to fight through this and jump through a lot of the proverbial hoops - to a pretty ridiculous degree - but then, the whole situation was ridiculous. Anyway, hope all goes well there, too.

Tuesday night, I had to say goodbye to my grandfather, as he was heading back to WA the next morning on an early flight. He'll be back in late May.
   My mother had to take him to the airport on Wednesday morning, which meant that I got stuck with the morning shift.  :P  And again today.  :P  :P  Sooo fun.

After work yesterday, I stopped by the bank and opened up a savings account. I've not had one in years, but I needed a safe place to put the check that my grandfather had given me during his visit, after emptying my IRA. It wasn't a staggering amount, but most certainly life-changing and very helpful.

I also arranged for a lovely arrangement of spring flowers to be delivered today to the lady who's fender I hit on Friday.
   My insurance covered everything, I suppose. I didn't agree with her decision to go through our insurance companies to resolve the issue, because I am still on my parents' plan, and it caused their rates to go up.  >:(
   However, I am not without sympathy or compassion and I most certainly don't wish to be ill-thought-of. I hoped that the flowers would properly convey a sincere apology on my behalf, and I hope that they will help her to feel better about things for the moment. And that they will help to offset the otherwise negative impression that I've imposed upon her memory. Hopefully time will help her to forget it.

Anyway, so...today. I have the bloody morning shift again, as I mentioned. And I've not eaten a thing all day. I think I'll head out to Panera after work for some soup in a breadbowl. After that, I'll do what I can to ship my stupid phone and its components back to the stupid company that stupidly screwed me over. Argh!
   This evening, I'll resume my power walking routine, come home, clean up and head out to my uncle's office. My MI music man owns me after that.
   Busy day.  :P  But it sure beats having nothing to do, I guess.

Anyway, I'm collected, braided and ready to take all of it on.

This too shall pass.  Hang in there!  *hugs*

((((((Trisha)))))) Thanx, girl.  :)

Yesterday: After lunch (at Panera, of course  ;)) and a nap at home, I did finally get my useless phone shipped back to Cricket. Good riddance...and they'd better hurry with my refund.  >:(

That evening, I resumed my power walking routine, which I'd taken a break from for a few days, as I'd washed my shoes and was waiting for them to dry. My shins were screaming halfway through it, but I pressed on without sympathy.
   After I'd returned home, rested for a few minutes and had started to wash my face, the rest of my body broke out in a sweat. I felt weak, ill and shaky, as though I would faint, and I knew that I was having a hypoglycemic attack. A big one.  :(  So I tried to finish washing up as quickly as possible, when all of a sudden, the phone rang.

My father answered, and I knew within seconds that he was talking with the lady who's fender I'd backed into last week. She had called to thank me for the flowers.  ;)  Apparently, she'd been moved to tears when she got them, and she thanked my father for raising such an amazing daughter. *blush*
   She broke down in tears again when my dad handed me the phone and she got to thank me in person, using terms like sweetheart, beautiful person, wonderful human being, etc. etc. etc. It was a great feeling knowing that I'd made her day and that I'd succeeded in leaving a better impression of myself upon her mind.  :)

After that, I adjusted my metabolism by stopping by a local drive-through before heading out to my uncle's office. It took an hour or so before my hands stopped shaking, but at least I knew that I would live. hehe I even ordered an Andes mint shake, which was quite awesome.  ;)  The rest of the night was spent in the office, chatting with my sweetheart. All of our communication has been reduced to online and snail mail while I don't have a cell phone. It sucks rocks. But it won't be like this forever.

Today: Oh how I longed to stay in bed longer than I was able to this morning.  :(  But time waits for no one and I had much to do. So I got up, gathered my shower things and took them into my parents bathroom for a WTCC. Washed first with Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo, then treated for an hour with Restoratives Time Renewal replenishing mask.
   While the treatment was working its magic, I rushed around the house in my sexxxy shower cap, robe & slippers doing laundry and dishes and refreshing my new manicure (wickedly dark, metallic purple  ;)).
   After an hour's time, I rinsed out the treatment and followed with Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner and the Cabellina horse conditioner respectively. Ahhh...

In the rush to get ready for work, I didn't have time to spray and detangle as usual, so I just let the wet, snaky strands air dry.
   I had some difficulty braiding this afternoon, but managed to make it work. All's well enough.

Musically, I'm still gradually breaking down my barriers and cautiously approaching rock again. I've been listening to mostly edgy pop and progressive stuff, so it won't be long before I'm Back In Black, as we say.  ;)

Today, I've also completed my 3rd month on vitamin E. I should be able to start seeing the results, if there are any, after now.

So I've managed to survive the immediate issues at hand. Thank goodness. Now all that's left to do is eagerly greet a much-needed weekend. Peace!

So what's new in the realm of hair? Not much. I'm still doing the WCC with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense S&C and the Cabellina horse conditioner, which is probably half gone by now.

On Sunday, the 1st, I measured in at 24½" right on schedule. Of course, it wasn't January's, February's or March's growth that concerned me...it's April's. Last year, I only got ¼" of growth for the month of April, so I've been worrying that the cycle will repeat itself.
   See, my hair is as heretical and unorthodox as the rest of me and its growth actually slows down during the warmer months...which sux, being that I live in SoCal, where it's warm almost year round.  :-/
   But I've just entered into my 4th month taking vitamin E every day, and I'm wondering whether that will help to stabilize the growth.

Yesterday I also mixed up a new "misting" solution, which consists of a little bit of baby oil, a little aloe vera gel, just a tiny bit of EVOO and the rest water. I used this new solution to mist the length of my hair today after detangling it. When my hair dried a little more, I misted the very ends again.
   For whatever reason, I waited until it was abut 75% dry, then got a wild hair up my butt and decided to finish with the blowfryer.  :o  Of course, I used the gentlest settings possible and tried to add volume to the roots while taming the short ends in the length that poke out everywhere. This strategy barely worked. Plus, my hair was a bit greasy from the misting spray, so I ended up just braiding it anyway.  :-/

What else...? I've been debating switching to Ice Shine S&C again. Maybe add a few of the Daily Moisture Renewal products in with it...maybe not. It might be a bit more economical and the back of my neck might not dry out so badly. *shrug* Maybe I'll just keep switching between Ice Shine and Breakage Defense. Who knows?

Anyway, that's all for now.

Clarifying day!  :)

The usual routine in my parents' shower with Pantene Purity shampoo, a 1L vinegar rinse, Breakage Defense and Cabellina conditioners (didn't leave either one in as I finished the rest of my shower, just rinsed them out).
   One thing I noticed about the Purity shampoo is that during the 2nd wash, after the vinegar rinse, its scent is akin to a dry, grapey white wine. At least, it strikes me this way. Not that I ever partake of anything alcoholic, mind you.

The usual air drying, nothing extraordinary. Hair is down, at least for the moment.

After a brief review of my records, I've learned that my hair is ¼" ahead of its progress last year. Encouraging...

Not too much going on on the hair front these days. Still doing the usual WCC routine every day, with the occasional overnight heavy EVOO treatment or replenishing mask treatment thrown in when I can. Still spraying, combing, misting and braiding. Pretty uneventful.
   The short pieces underneath (from where I severed a lock of my hair and sent it to my guy) are still short, but slowly growing. The short, frizzy ends throughout the length are still there. I don't like them, but I'm getting used to them. Nothing else to do while they're growing out...if they're growing out. And the length is still slowly creeping down my back. It's encouraging to think that I'll reach BSL this year, even after my upcoming trim.

Had to take a shower in my own bathroom this morning. The inconvenience of the new showerhead makes me mad enough to swear. A lot.  :-X  It took me almost an hour and a half this morning because the infernal contraption doesn't rinse anything for crap and the water pressure in there is a complete joke.  >:(

But anyway, I finally updated my résumé yesterday and was able to print out a simple, fax-friendly version on plain white paper. It still looked great.  :)  After tomorrow, if the finances allow, I'll get some new ivory (or maybe even gray) parchment paper to print it on for the instances where I'll actually be handing it out. A great-looking résumé is an important and empowering tool for any woman to have, I think. And it seems even more an accomplishment when said woman has a.) finally found stability in the corporate working environment and b.) finally conquered the Résumé Wizard program by learning how to duplicate the #@%& fields!  ;D

Why all the fuss over a résumé? Well...next month will mark my 2-year anniversary with my current company. With this sort of stability on record, I must venture out in search of additional, possibly other employment altogether. My current job is very secure, which I greatly appreciate, but it fails to support my financial obligations entirely. It covers the basics, but there is very little leeway for crucial things like savings or unexpected disasters (the latter of which occur quite often in my life  :P). So, the time has come to explore the deeper waters...or at least supplement the shallow. A new phase emerges.

As for the long-distance love affair, it's still going strong. It should only be a matter of weeks before *he* finally arrives for a visit. We've had enough of waiting for luck to bless our unfortunate situation (the distance, I mean). It's time to make our own luck. No more unanswered prayers or pennies tossed into fountains carrying wishes for our present and future. No more waiting for the perfect opportunity to present itself. That might never happen. It's up to us now to make the perfect opportunity. Perhaps only then will our hopes be validated. God helps those who help themselves.

If I sound melodramatic and incoherent, it's because I am.  :P  9:20 in the morning is too early for my nocturnal cells to function. And I've been trying to make them work since 5.

Well, Happy Easter, all.  :)

The bunny was kind to me this morning and gave me a plastic storage container full of treats...robin eggs, jelly beans, Reese's white chocolate eggs...along with a Calgon Hawaiian ginger gift set, a nail brush, a gel eye mask and a shower cap. hehe My sister got a storage container with the same stuff, except her Calgon gift set was Tahitian orchid. Mmmm...
   Now all that's left to do is find things to put into the storage box, which shouldn't be difficult for me.

Hair-wise, nothin' special. Still doing the WCC's. Yesterday I switched from Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense to Time Renewal. Friday and Saturday, I didn't comb my hair until it was totally dry. Just applied whichever leave-in that I happened to pick up at the time and let it air dry.
   Today I wet combed, though. The difference is that combing distributes the leave-in's evenly throughout my hair and makes it easier to comb through during the rest of the day. But if all I'm doing is dry combing and putting it back in a braid, it doesn't matter much.

Lately, I've been going over some "hair ideas" to try next year. One of which would be to avoid wet combing altogether...another would be to finally try Biosilk, even though it does contain oil.  :-/  Not sure what sort of effects these ideas would have on my hair, but that's what the whole experimentation thing is all about. Trial and error. So we'll see about all that when the time comes. It's still a ways off yet.

In other news, I've finally more or less made peace with the stupid new showerhead in my bathroom. It's totally inefficient, but I'll just have to make do, I guess.  :P
   And on Friday, I bought new ivory parchment paper and was able to print out several copies of my new résumé onto it. Looks gorgeous!  :D
   I am still taking vitamin E every day and power walking every other night.

So that's about it for now. Hair's behaving, bills are paid, books are balanced and everything's in order.  :)  Hope everyone else is well too.

Hair: The usual WCC today in my own shower, which was frustrating as usual. No spraying, no combing, no detangling of any sort while my hair was wet. I separated some of the serpentine strands, but that was it. My hair was dry when I arrived at work, so I slipped into the ladies' room and combed it out. It's still down at the moment, but I might braid it during my break if it becomes a bother.
   This morning, I was able to free up some space in my "hair" drawer when I removed the craft supplies that I'd been keeping in there. Found a use for the little storage container that the Easter bunny gave me yesterday.  ;)  Now it's stored in my armoire, along with my art supplies, and my drawer has  more room for lovely gothic hairtoys, when I finally get around to making them.

Other Stuff: Just when everything was in order...the long-distance relationship thing is strained yet again. *sigh* And we were doing so well, too.  :(  You know what just occurred to me, too, is that his attitude seems to change dramatically whenever he gets his hair cut.  ;D  Absurd, isn't it? But I think the last time we had a row...or rather, the last time I tired of his behaviour and distanced myself from it...was the last time he had a haircut.  ::)  Whatever. I still love that child, but I'm afraid that he has much growing up to do.
   I've also realized that it's asking far too much for him to visit SoCal when he hasn't a proper, stable source of income. It isn't fair to either of us setting such a lofty goal right now. So...it rests. Yes, I have the means to visit him in MI...but given the current circumstances, that would not be the best decision on my part. In any case, it's time to be realistic. A real life meeting for us isn't going to happen anytime soon. That's all I care to say on the matter.

As for me, well...one day at a time. It's time I started focusing on myself again and addressing my own immediate needs. After all, in the end, I'm all I've got.

How long have you been in this long distance relationship?  

2 years ago, my husband started a new job and had to move to another city for about 2 or 3 months before I could follow him.  We were able to fly out to see each other on the weekends, but it was still very difficult.  

The two of you appear very committed to your relationship, but I'm sure it must be tough being so far away from each other for so long.  Do either of you have plans to relocate in the future so that you can at least be in the same city?

La Diosa: The long-distance thing has been going on for over 7 months now. We have the typical ups and downs like any other relationship (not that ours is official), but generally, we have both been very committed to it.

I don't need to tell you how difficult the distance part can be. You already know. Of course, you and yours were already married when you had to go through it, so I'm sure that makes it both easier in some ways and more difficult in others. More difficult, obviously, because it's the worst thing in the world to be so far apart from the person you love most. Easier, though, because your marriage brings you the reassurance that he'll be coming back to you eventually.

Of course, being that the boy and I are not married, it also makes it easier for me to walk away if need be.  :-/

ETA: As far as moving into the same city (I don't know why this slipped my mind earlier), there are no current plans in the works as yet. We're both quite attached to different states - he to MI and I to WA - so I just don't know...

Quote:

It's time I started focusing on myself again and addressing my own immediate needs. After all, in the end, I'm all I've got.

Amen to that, sistah!  *hugs*  Taking care of ourselves isn't selfish...I think of it as self-defense.   :)

For some reason I thought it was longer than 7 months.  Well, wether you decide to move to the same city or not I wish you luck and happiness! :)

Trish: Self defense. I like that.  :)  *hugz*

La Diosa: Yup, 7 months. Though we've known each other several years now and were very close friends before it became romantic. Thank you sooo much for the encouragement, girlfriend. I really hope that things work out for us.  :)

Hair: Tuesday is clarifying day. White grapey clarifying day. I've already mentioned how Pantene Purity shampoo smells like white grapes when it follows a white vinegar rinse.
   Today's conditioners were Restoratives Time Renewal and Cabellina horse conditioner. No spraying, combing or detangling of any sort yet again, as is routine on clarifying days. In the time that I normally would have devoted to detangling (on a regular WCC day), I instead went out into the backyard, admired the new blooms on all of my rosebushes and enjoyed the gentle breezes as they swept past my skin and through my hair.
   As of now, it's down and behaving its clean self. When I took my break at 3:00, I combed it out and looked over the area where all of the frizzy ends are poking out everywhere. My hair seems divided into 3 almost equally-sized parts. The bottom part is the oldest and lightest (obviously) and has minimal frizzy ends. This is also the thinnest part. The middle part is where all of the frizzy ends are. It takes up about 7" right in the middle of the length. The top part is the newest, darkest and healthiest. No frizzy ends there at all, from what I can see. So WTF is up with all the frizzy ends? I've never known whether they're breakage or the ends of new growth or what, but they've been plaguing me for about a year now. If I knew what was causing them, then I'd know what to do to prevent them...ay, there's the rub.

Other: Well the good news is that the boy and I didn't suffer much down time and are already on the mend. One really cool thing about this relationship is that neither of us can stand being at even the slightest of odds with each other, and will both put out the necessary effort to work out whatever problem has presented itself. I have never had that before. In the past, it was commonplace for whichever clown I was with at the time to either bail at the first sign of trouble or simply not care enough to resolve whatever had come between us.
   Not this guy, though. *He* shows uncommon levels of devotion and maturity for someone his age (at least where *he* and I are concerned)...just don't tell *him* I said that because he does still have a lot of growing to do. hehe  ;D
   The bad news is that it's not all over just yet. We're a strong team, but we both have to be strong as individuals if we want that collective strength to last.

Anyway, my brain is dead tired right now and I'm not really sure why. But I should stop typing before I lose my place again.

Hair: Today I washed once with Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo and finished off the bottle. After finishing my shower, I gave my hair a final rinse and squeezed out the excess water with my microfiber towel. Then I applied a luxe version of Snowy's Moisture Treatment. This consisted of 1 tsp. EVOO, 1tsp. honey, 1½ tsp. aloe vera gel, 3 tsp. Pantene Deep Fortifying Treatment and 1 tsp. Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal Replenishing Mask. And I drizzled some more honey on top of that just for fun.
   Anyway, left this concoction in my hair for over an hour while doing dishes, etc. and watching TV with my sis (we so rarely get to hang out anymore  :(). Then I rinsed the stuff out with warm water (yes, warm water today because cold activates cramps  :P) and ooh la la! Very silky. Even more so after the horse conditioner.  ;)

Today, I also sprayed in the usual leave-in's and wet combed with my broken RS #45. Didn't have time to oil, though.  :-/  Hair is down for the day, but I'll braid it when I go out for my walk tonight. Missed last night. Dangit.  >:(

Other: Yeah...nothing that I care to talk about right now.  >:(  

Morning shift again. Blargh.  :P

Had time for the usual WCC with one of the most frustrating showerheads ever (the one in my bathroom). Detangled as usual, but no time for oil. I ended up being 5 minutes late to work as it was. &@#$ traffic.  >:(
   
As of now, I'm running on less than 3 hours of sleep. Starbucks helped out a bit with a dose of sugar and caffeine and I'm hoping that the buzz lasts until my shift is over. Lordy, I sound like an addict.  ::)

So yeah, hair is down until my break. Then I suppose I'll braid it. Same ol' routine as I just let it grow, which is exactly what it's doing. I'm quite close to BSL, but even when I reach it, it will be a short-lived victory. I'm planning to get a trim right around the 1st of June and my scissor lady usually hacks off 1½" at a time. That should put me right back at 2 feet even...which is still ok. I'll finish the year out strong.

I still have no idea what's causing the wispy, frizzy ends to stick out in the middle. I'm just hoping that they grow out. They're likely evidence of either stress-related damage or a growth spurt that I had a few years ago. Maybe my hair is simply renewing itself.  :-/

Last night I caught you-know-what for using my parents' shower. My father bade that I go out and get a showerhead of my own choosing and said that he would install it in my bathroom. That's right...I have to pay for it.  ::)  Men, I swear. Whatever. So long as I don't have to keep using the one that's in there now, I guess.

Speaking of men, or overgrown boys, I didn't get to talk to my far-away friend at all yesterday.  :'(  He knows my schedule, so he'd better have a darn good reason for not being around.

So...yeah. Battling stress and depression yet again. But it won't last forever.

Alright, phone's going crazy. Gotta go.  :P

Last night, I actually managed to get some sleep. Huzzah! It wasn't enough, and I didn't want to get out of bed this morning, but it beats another anxious, tearful, sleepless night for sure.

I tried to take a nap when I got home from work yesterday, but to no avail. By mid-evening, I was in the early stages of an anxiety attack. But after dinner and a power walk and a glass of water, I was doing a bit better, as I knew I would be. Talking to my far-away friend helped, too...though the latest problem is far from over. *sigh*  :(

Today, I'm a little better still. Did a WWCC this morning in my own shower (I don't suppose I'll be using my parents' anymore  :(). Sprayed and misted before wet combing. I ran out of my Pantene Light Spray Conditioner, so I emptied the last of the bottle's contents into my Restoratives Strengthening Spray. I'll probably have to swing by Target tonight and pick up some new Light Spray Conditioner. Maybe some new hair stuff altogether.
   I also rinsed out my oil bottle and made a new solution, which I used on the ends of my hair when I got to work this afternoon. Right now, everything's back, braided and behaving.

Something interesting...my sweetheart had a dream a few nights ago in which I had hip length hair!  :o  My hair is always very long in his dreams, which I think is cute - I hope he isn't disappointed when he finally gets here. heh Then again, by the time he finally does get here, my hair may be down to my toes!  :P
   But still...why can't I ever have long-haired dreams?

Speaking of the boy, things are a little better on the pseudo-relationship front, although far from perfect. It still has a long way to go before it can be completely functional/healthy and I wonder whether we have what it takes individually to see it through. There's definitely some evolution needed on his part. Time will tell, I suppose. In the mean time, we'll keep praying.

Still no refund from the stupid wireless company. I shipped all of the products back to the warehouse and I know that they received it last Wednesday. But I also know that it will probably be several weeks before I see any of my own money back...which is ridiculous.  >:(

Anyway, a much-needed weekend awaits. Wonder what I'll do with it...

Hi Angelspun,

    A new love interest! how exciting and wonderful. One time i read that being in love makes your hair grow faster.  I hope it works for you and goodluck with the new guy!  How cool that he dreamt that you had hip length hair.  I hear that guys love long hair. May your hair grow to your knees.  ;D


                                                                Love,
                                                                Curlygirl

Curlygirl: You are the sweetest thing. Thank you kindly for all of the "hair wishes."  :)  If being in love makes your hair grow faster, all the better. I'll take all the help that I can get.

Hair: No complaints. Well, except for the wispy bits sticking out everywhere in the middle of the length. Other than that, my hair has been very well behaved of late. Just long, smooth and straight. I didn't have time to oil the ends today, and my hair looks decent enough that I suppose I'm just going to leave it down. I brought barettes to work with me so I can pin the sides up during my break. Princess hair.  :)  I'll worry about the braiding and oiling and whatever else tonight.
   
Still doing the WCC's with Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal S&C and Cabellina horse conditioner, but...the back of my neck has been dearly paying the price. It's dry and flaky from chemical burn once again and I'm pretty sure that my current conditioners are the cause.
   So this weekend, I went a little crazy and bought tons of new Pantene products.  :o  Huge bottles of Ice Shine S&C, a new Light Spray Conditioner, Deep Fortifying Treatment, Intensive Restoration Treatment and Intensive Replenishing Mask. I'm thinking that I shall return to Target this evening for a huge bottle of Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner to use for my 2nd conditioning.
   Tomorrow will be another white grapey clarifying day. New start. Can't wait.

Other Stuff: The boy and I are back on track.  :)  I asked God to help us restore the relationship, and we did. Thank heavens for small miracles.
   Things are still going well in that general area. Quite honestly, I'm still hearing wedding bells, but shhhhhhh...let's just keep that on the low for now, shall we?  :-X  ;)  I will say that if things work out as we're both hoping they will, it will be a blessed thing indeed.

After my father's Saturday gig (which I caught the last hour of) at a local car show, he and I went shopping around town for my new laptop. Yep, I'm getting a brand new laptop!!  :D  No more wasting gas driving to and from my uncle's office to use his dysfunctional old computers. Soon...very soon...I shall have my own.
   While we were out, we stopped at Radio Shack where we replaced my broken old cell phone with a brand new one and reinstated my service.  :D  I'm still trying to figure out all of my new phone's features, but I imagine I'll learn quickly. Such is my innate way with all things electronic.

So a rebirth it certainly is. Good things are unfolding from every side...quite the welcome contrast from last year!

But, some sad news also...a longtime neighbour of mine was taken to the hospital in an ambulence yesterday morning, and they have since discovered that his liver is beginning to fail. He is in the final stages of cancer and will probably not make it much longer. My family and his (he has a wife and 2 teenage kids) have known each other since they moved into their current house across the street from us about 16 years ago. I used to babysit his children, in fact, when they were young.
   So it sux big time. The dreadful disease has worn him away to almost nothing, and it shouldn't be long now... I feel terrible for his family, and it hits close to home for mine, given how many of our loved ones cancer has already claimed. So I'll pray for him. Nothing else one can do.

Anyway, that's about it for now. Peace.

Sorry to hear about your neighbor but it's good to hear about all of your good forturne! :D

Wedding bells... :o We'll keep it low but it does sound very exciting! :)  

*shoots down the &@#% wedding bells and stomps on the fragments*

Perhaps I spoke too soon...  >:(

Haven't heard from Mr. Inconsistent since last night when, after an hour-long phone call and the most casual goodbye ever, he promised to call back...and didn't.  >:(  I still have no idea what's going on on his end and am a bit concerned, but my gut tells me that I have more cause to be angry than worried. UGH - men!!  >:(

Anyway, everything else is fine. Did a clarifying wash this morning in my own shower...which went as well as could be expected with the utterly dysfunctional showerhead.  :P
   Yesterday, I picked up a huge bottle of Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, and am more than ready to jump back into Ice Shine. I'll be using a collection of products that work best for my hair from Pantene's basic lines. My hair always loved the Daily Moisture Renewal conditioners and treatments, but the shampoo was horrible. It loves Ice Shine S&C, so I'm using that and of course the Detangle Light Spray Conditioner and Deep Fortifying Treatments, which have always worked quite well. This way, I'll be able to alternate treatments according to my hair's needs and my mood at the time. Oh yes, and avoiding the chemical burn that Restoratives products have caused on the back of my neck is helpful as well.

Right now, hair is braided and just being.

No laptop as yet. I might drag my father to Best Buy with me tonight to finally buy the one I want. It doesn't have a 10-key, but I suppose I'll just have to work around that. Anyone know how to do Alt commands on a laptop?  :-?

Well, you never know what the future may hold but hang in there, I'm sure you'll be fine at any rate. ;)

Unfortunately, I have no idea how to do Alt commands unless of course you want to know how to type accents in español.:-/  
I'm sure th the information is available somewhere on the internet though.

Aww, thanx, La Diosa. *hugz*

So I found out yesterday that the reason *he* didn't call back last night was because somehow, when my phone was replaced, my number and my mother's were switched. My music man had actually tried calling a few times, unable to get through. As for the "casual" goodbye...turns out I'd just misheard him.  :-[  :-[  :-[  Boy, do I feel sheepish.  :P

Again, I hear the soft chiming of wedding bells in the distance...  ;D

Anywho, today was my first day back on Ice Shine. I washed twice with the shampoo, and left the conditioner in the length of my hair while I finished the rest of my shower. Then I rinsed my hair and conditioned once more with Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. My hair felt remarkable when it was wet, and I was amazed at how clean the shampoo made my hair feel.  :)

This afternoon, I was late for work, so I didn't have time to detangle my hair while it was wet. Just separated the strands when I could, let them air dry, then combed and braided. Tonight, I might do a heavy EVOO treatment.

Other than that... *sigh* it's just a pretty good day. I've been on Cloud 9 since I talked to the boy last night. Things are going well, and I am most definitely onto something good.  ;)


So close no matter how far...

Ugh.

That pretty much sums up this morning. Ugh.  :P
   Once again, I'm running on a staggering 3 hours of sleep...and once again, I woke up terribly nauseous, faint and cold. I had to keep sitting and squatting down in the shower between tasks just to keep from vomiting or passing out.  :P  I'm not sure why my body does this every time I have to get up early, but it's chronic.
   I also had to use very warm/hot water in the shower (cooler on the hair, of course) because someone's too cheap to actually turn on the heater when it's bloody cold outside. But anyway...

After the shower, I crawled right back into bed and just laid there for awhile, feeling miserable. When the urge struck me, I got up and dressed...but my room is at least 20° colder than the rest of the house, for whatever reason, and I ended up freezing...and climbing back into bed with my clothes on.  :P  I wanted so badly to just stay there and not move and just sleep...but alas, I had to get moving or wind up stuck in morning traffic. So reluctantly, I got out of bed one more time, put my shoes on, detangled my hair, gathered my stuff and left, outfitted in my winter coat and gloves.

Hours later, I've had water and something to eat, which seems to have helped quite a bit. Especially the water. When I was a teenager, someone taught me that water cures nausea, and I've found it to be an incredibly helpful tip.

Nothing terribly special on the hair front. Still the Ice Shine/DMR WCC and today I detangled as usual with the Light Spray Conditioner and my broken RS #45. No oil, though. I simply didn't have time. Although, I did do a very heavy EVOO treatment last night.
   Right now, it's just down. I didn't feel like doing anything with it.

In other news, I finally picked up my new laptop yesterday after work. It's great - I haven't gotten to play around with it much yet. But my real problem is that I can't figure out how to enter the bloody encryption code so that it will be able to connect with the wireless network in the house. Ah, technology...  :P

So, that's today. I missed my walk last night and have to make it up tonight. And I'm in desperate need of a manicure. I'm not quite as ill now as I was when I first woke up, but I'm still far from functional.  :P  Only the thought of my best friend in MI keeps me going. God willing, we'll be together soon.

Hair: Today was a WWCC...washed twice with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, and I'm still amazed at how clean it makes my hair. I like it. Conditioned once with Ice Shine conditioner (on the length - left in for awhile) and Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner (bottom half of length - immediately rinsed out).
   Detangled as usual with Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner and my broken RS #45. And I actually oiled the ends today.  :)  They're pretty greasy, so I'm going to braid my hair when I get a break and then just forget about it. I'm hoping that I soon have the opportunity to deep condition with one of the new treatments that I bought.

The Unresolved: Well, my neighbour (the one with cancer) passed away on Sunday night and his service was today. I had to come to work early to relieve my mother so she could make it to his funeral. I had to miss it, but...that's life. My mother and I will visit his family later, and we'll bring a card and a peace plant for them.

On Sunday, I'm having an IT specialist over to hook up my laptop to the wireless network in my house. I exhausted every resource trying to do it myself, so that's my only other option. Infernal machines...

I also tried looking up Alt commands for laptops online and found nothing. My guess is that the trick lies in an alternate function key that most laptops seem to have. I must try to remember to ask the IT guy about it when he comes over. He'll probably know more about it than I do.


Quote:

Unfortunately, I have no idea how to do Alt commands unless of course you want to know how to type accents in español. :-/

lol no worries, La Diosa. I'm already quite familiar with the Spanish accents...or accents graves as we call them en français.  ;)  Being bilingual, I rely on them...so I must learn how to make them without a separate 10-key.

As for Tuesday, I have jury duty.  :P  Oh joy. Right now, I'm waiting for the AVP to return so he can sign my absence report form and I can let payroll know that they can neglect to pay me for that day...stupid %&#$ing court system.  >:(
   I will say that anyone who believes that jurors are truly selected at random has their head up their  :-X  *ahem* ...in a most unfortunate place. Truth is there's absolutely nothing "random" about it. Employees of my company are summoned more than anyone else I have ever known...and we're probably not the only ones. I daresay that that will be one advantage to finding other employment next month, if I choose to do so. I definitely will not miss being summoned for jury duty every year.  :P

Everything Else: Right. Like I have time for anything else?  ::)  I had a nice lunch from Subway yesterday. Turkey, swiss and avocado. Mmmm...
   I walked last night and will again tonight. And I might walk both nights this weekend. Why not? It's not like I have anything to lose...except the extra lbs.
   The pseudo-relationship is..."weird" right now. Not terrible and not wonderful. Just...weird. It'll work itself out if it's meant to...but that's all I'm going to say.

Anyway, hope everybody has a good weekend. Go out, hit the bars, play mini golf at night, whatever you're into. Have fun and be safe...but please do something other than laundry and networking, ok?  ;)

Bad Hair Days: Blargh. That's how I'm feeling about my hair lately.  :P
   I'm still doing the WCC's with Pantene Ice Shine and Daily Moisture Renewal. Still detangling with Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and my broken RS #45. Still misting the ends and occasionally the length with my water/oil/aloe solution. Still taking vitamin E every day (almost 4 months now), still clarifying once a week, still doing deep conditioning/heavy EVOO treatments whenever I can. So what's wrong?

Well...morale is a huge factor right now. Usually, I don't care that much. I go about my routine with a fairly neutral attitude because, I suppose, it helps to keep my frustrations at bay. I usually don't get rattled until someone says something negative about it, which does happen on occasion. My parents do not support my will for long hair at all, and it's all too easy for their friends to take their side.
   Just such a thing happened yesterday morning. I was standing in the kitchen, minding my own...my parents and one of their friends were in the next room. Then, from out of nowhere, my father looked at me and said, in front of everyone, that he thought I'd been using too much conditioner or something because it always looks as if it's been "soaked in 30 weight" as he put it.  :-/  Of course, this was first thing in the morning...before I'd had a shower or anything, so of course my hair would have been oily! He then said that he'd been looking at it the day before and thought the same thing. Then it became a regular bashfest of sorts. My father started it, his friend chimed in and then my mother joined. "Hair convictions" were flying, along with the usual ignorance and intolerance. I wasn't part of the argument, of course, but my hair was the basis of it.

My mother said that my hair looked fuzzy and needed a trim...which I'll admit is true. And I think I'll schedule my next one for the beginning of May instead of June. It needs it. And so long as I reach BSL this year, I don't care so much about going longer. Save that for next year, maybe.
   As for the "fuzziness," I have accepted that the ends sticking out in the middle of my length are, in fact, breakage rather than new growth. And I got them during the traumatic year and a half with my last boyfriend.  :P

So yeah, the 3-way bashfest (yet again!) worked wonders for my longhair morale. At that moment, I would have welcomed a hair compliment from anyone. I thought about my far-away friend, and that if any such compliment should come my way, it would most likely come from him, right? Wrong. Love *him* as I may, he isn't the compliment type. He doesn't take them well and would not be likely to give one. He never said anything about the lock of hair that I sacrificed and sent to him. Nothing that would resemble a compliment, that is. And I'd be fronting if I said that I don't have an ounce of regret about sending it to him.
   So my morale is in the toilet and this morning, I considered shaving my head.  :o

But rather than resorting to such dramatic, impulsive measures, I'm going over my current routine. Deciding what I can do differently for lower impact on my hair, which should lead to less breakage. Once I reach BSL, I might just maintain it for awhile while I grow the damage out.

Today, I also tried BB's wet handed braiding technique with good results.  :)  Thanx, BB!

In Other News: Huzzah! My new laptop is now connected to the wireless network in my house. Granted, that required setting up a new wireless network with a new router et al, costing me a great deal. Problem is now my sister's laptop won't connect. Argh! So now, not only are my parents furious with me, I'll have to shell out even more of my hard-earned $$$ to get a new wireless card for my sister's laptop. And so long as it's in for repairs, I might spring for a new cursor as well, since her current one is worn out. She said that she would reimburse me. *sigh* It just never ends...

On the flip side, however, I no longer have to spend late nights at my uncle's office, dealing with his archaic, dysfunctional equipment. Yay.

My state tax return arrived in the mail over the weekend. Still waiting on federal. When I've saved up enough, I'm going to have my car detailed. Pinstriping and everything.  ;)
   Speaking of my car, I washed and waxed it Saturday night only to have a bird fly by and do his business on the right taillight Sunday morning.  :P  That's exactly my kinda luck.

So jury duty awaits tomorrow. Can't wait. To get it over with, that is...

When people start digging on you, the way your parents and their friend did, try doing what I do:  smile at them and walk away.  That's right, smile and walk away.   ;)  Not an evil smile, or a sneering smile; make it a genuine "have a nice day" smile.  It drives people crazy because they expect an argument from you.  Don't give them the satisfaction.   8-)  *hugs*

Ahh, Trisha...I think you misunderstand. An argument is when multiple parties voice opposing ideas from different standpoints. A bashfest is one-sided. Where one or more parties voice a singular, mutual opinion about a certain person or object, whether said person or object is present or not.
   This was a bashfest, not an argument. I do not argue with my parents simply because it would be pointless. Both are extremely stubborn, narrow and prejudiced people, convinced that their way is the only way. Everyone else is wrong. I learned a long time ago not to argue with them or try to open up their minds even a little. It's a futile effort and a waste of breath.
   So it wouldn't matter if I smiled and walked away or not. Their comments would continue...and I would still hear them. *shrug*

Anyway, I did a heavy EVOO treatment last night and this time, I applied the oil to my scalp as well as the length. That infernal sleep cap was again a pain and I couldn't wait to take it off when I woke up.

This morning was a WTC routine. Washed once with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, then treated for an hour with the Intensive Restoration Treatment from the DMR line. After rinsing that out, I finished with the DMR conditioner. All of my rinsing was done under the faucet rather than with the blasted showerhead in my bathroom. Rather, I got most of whatever I was rinsing out at the time with the faucet, then finished with the showerhead. *sigh* I completely despise that thing.

I was against wet detangling today, so I just sprayed Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner and my oil solution onto the length of my hair and let it air dry. I'll comb and braid it during my break as usual.

Lately, I've been considering the seek and destroy idea in hopes that it might help with some of the damaged ends that poke out everywhere. I've never really done it before, but then...my hair has never looked as it currently does before.  :(  &@%$ that flannel bedding! And &@%$ its owner too! It's just one more way that he screwed me over.  >:(  Curse him!

*ahem* So next week, I will be scheduling (or trying to) an appointment with my scissor lady. Even if she takes off the usual 1½" that will be fine. So long as I still reach 2 feet again and hit BSL by the end of the year, I'll be content. I must focus on the overall health of my hair rather than the length. The healthier something is, the longer it can grow and live.
   Once I reach BSL, I might just maintain it for awhile. Until all of my tumultuous past has grown out.

In other news, jurty duty was even more boring than expected. I always seem to forget to bring a book or a magazine or anything to help me pass the time, so I just waited. And waited. And waited.  :P  Fortunately, I don't have to go back for at least another year.

With the rest of my day off, I took my sister's laptop to the store to see if they could do anything with it...but they found no defect with it. My sister said that she might have a computer-savvy friend of hers work on it. So I'm off the hook for the time being.

The long distance thing is still going, though doubt is creeping back into the picture. *sigh* So what else is new?

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does
                          -The Smiths, How Soon Is Now?

Even though you doubt, have faith, if it's meant to work out, it will. Long distance relationships CAN work! (I had one that has turned into living with him).
Good luck with the computer/wireless problems, too.
And I'm sorry your family is being so completely inconsiderate... I wish I had something that I could tell you to help, but my method of dealing with my parents' similar attitude was to completely avoid them for almost a year.
And by the way, I love that The Smiths song  (i sort of prefer the TATU version though:-/) and from what you've described it is, unfortunately accurate. Best wishes to you.

Kiraela: Thanx, girl. *hugz*  :)

I'm well aware that long distance relationships can work. My parents and grandparents are testaments to that.  ;)  

As for the blatant rudeness of my parents & co., I'm unfortuntely quite accustomed to it. At any given moment, they'll find one thing or another to rip on me for. It's always something. *shrug* I'm not going to put up a front and pretend that it doesn't bother me at all. It does hurt my feelings, but when you grow up in an environment where things like that happen all the time, you do kinda get used to it. Not that that makes it ok...
   As for avoiding them, that's rather difficult to do when you live with them. But I do stay out of their way as much as possible and keep my personal business private.

Hair: Another WCC today. I wet detangled with Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner, my oil mist solution and my broken RS #45. hehe I swear, one of these days, I'm going to have to replace that Rachael Stephens comb. I love it (works great on my wet hair) but that missing tooth is just too much.  ::)
   Right now, hair is dry and braided and all is well.

Last night, I almost bought a light conditioner so I could begin doing CWC's. But at the last minute, I reconsidered, figuring that I'd want to use up all of my Ice Shine/DMR products first. Perhaps the CWC's can wait until June. Then I'll have an even 6 months of experimentation with it and should be able to see if it benefits my hair.

Other: I haven't lost any weight this month and it's bumming me out.  :(  I've been walking every other night with nothing to show for it. Next month, I'm going to add ab training to my routine and I may resume my junk food strikes.

My far-away friend says that he'll be here soon. *sigh* Funny, he's been saying that for the past 7 months now. Nevermind that he never sent me anything for Christmas, my birthday or Valentine's Day.  :(  I love the boy, but I'm not blind. If he could manage to get his act together and find a <bleep>ing job, then my outlook might be a bit more positive. But he's not making the effort, pure and simple so naturally, I do feel slighted.
   *He* is still my best friend and I'm willing to stand by him and support him, as he realizes that his routine needs to change. But that won't last forever. Ultimately, no amount of support or encouragement on my part is going to help him if he keeps neglecting to help himself.

Alright, I'm done. Sorry for the rant.  :-X  :P

Come to Missouri and move in with us!  We have an extra bedroom, y'know!   ;D   *hugs*

Trisha: Man, if things get much worse here, I might take you up on that offer.  :(  *hugz*

Hair: Another WTC today. Washed once with Patnene Ice Shine shampoo, treated for an hour with the Intensive Moisturizing Mask, then finished with the Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Detangled and oiled as usual. Huzzah!

Work: Next week will see my 2-year anniversary with my current company. After that, I will start looking for *sniff* other employement.  :(  At this point, I'm not sure whether I'll be looking for a 2nd job to supplement my current one or another job entirely. If I choose the latter and it doesn't work out, I can always come back to this one. *gulp!*
   But I'm afraid to give up the security that my current job allows. I've never had this kind of stability before. Not to this extent, at least. *sigh* Decisions, decisions...  :-/

Love...? May be irreparably damaged, I regret to say. I really don't see a way out of this one. Of course, I've said that before...but this time, I really don't know. This latest setback may be the biggest one we've ever faced...and with all of the drama that he's already caused, I'm growing wearier of it all. Perhaps this will indeed be the year that I swear off men forever. They have never brought me anything but pain.

Other: Speaking of idiotic men, my father screamed at me yesterday afternoon because my sister's laptop still wasn't connected to our wireless network. He said, among other things, that I only cared about myself and so long as my laptop was working properly, I didn't care about anything else. In reality, I've been trying to connect my sister's laptop all week. But would he hear that? Do men hear anything?
   He also threatened to trash my new laptop if my sister's wasn't connected by this weekend. At the time, it didn't occur to me that I could press all sorts of charges.  ;D  He also told me to pack up my belongings and leave...
   A little while later, he apologized, saying that he'd had a [lousy] 3 days and didn't have anyone else to yell at. How lovely of him to take all of it out on me...  >:(  And it's most certainly not the first time. Freaking men!  >:(

Anyway, I have someone coming out to work on my sister's laptop tonight, so all should be well by the weekend. On that front, at least... *sigh*  :'(

Sorry about the day you've had, sounds pretty rough. :(

As far as the new job, I'm sure that working 2 jobs at first would be best.  That way, if you don't like the new one you could always drop it and remain in the first one until something you really like comes along.  It's sometimes difficult to gauge how a job will turn out unless you've been there for a while.  Good luck with your decision, and the job hunting. :)

Thanx, La Diosa. Taking a 2nd part time job to supplement my first one is probably just what I'll do. Almost time to start looking...

So today ended up being a sort of unintentional "hair day." Before my shower this morning, I did my very first seek & destroy/dusting just to see if it would help at all with the fuzzy, broken ends everywhere. And I think it might have actually helped a bit.  :)

After my shower, I scheduled an appointment with my scissor lady for a trim on the 6th of May (my mother's b-day). I'll probably lose 2" but that's ok with me. So long as I reach BSL by the end of the year, I'm good. I'll put a new ticker up after the trim, since my old one is now void.

This afternoon, I finally went out and bought a brand new showerhead for my bathroom. It's a cute little handheld model with a chrome finish, and I think it should work better for my hair than its predecessor. *crosses fingers*

In other news, my far-away friend and I somehow managed to find a way out of the storm again. At least kind of. I still feel slighted, but at least I believe now that he could make things better when I bring it up. I guess ultimately we just want and need each other too much to let anything come between us.
   I also learned a few days ago that *he* wants to be official.  :D  I mean together officially. He's wanted it since we first became romantically involved. *swoon* While it can't happen just yet, I now know that it will happen soon.  :)  That kid, man...

Unfortunately, not everything is roses. I'd made an appointment for Friday evening for someone to come out and connect my sister's laptop to our wireless network. But just before the guy was supposed to arrive, I couldn't find the thing anywhere and ended up having to cancel the appointment. I later learned that my sister had hidden her laptop from me so I couldn't use it. WTF?!  :-?
   So Saturday morning, my parents screamed at me because her laptop still wasn't hooked up.  >:(  I scheduled another appointment for May 5th. What a friggin' nightmare this has become.  :P

Last night, I missed another walk, so I'm gonna have to go tonight and tomorrow. *sigh* Life...

HAAAAALLELUJAH!  :D

Today was my first shower with the new showerhead and it works awesomely well! Pretty darn good for $20 at least. The only drawback is that it doesn't have a swivel ball, but I can live without one, I guess. It rinses really well, it's small and shiny and I luuurve it.  ;D

Even after waking up a bit late, I still had time for a WWCC. Detangled as usual with Pantene Light Spray Conditioner, my oil spray solution and my broken RS #45. Then oiled the ends. I'm getting down to the last third or fourth of my oil bottle, so the solution is more concentrated and my hair is greasy today.  :P  But it's all going into a braid soon enough, so it won't matter.

So it looks as if I'll have 2 measurements for the month of May. One before the trim and one after. I'm looking forward to both measure days and am hoping that I still get the usual ½" of growth even after the trim. *crosses fingers*

In other news, the boy and I are totally back on track. He never fails to address whatever's bothering me and make it all ok again...in ways that only he can. *sigh* I wonder if it's too early to think about wedding hairstyles...  :o  :-X  ;)

Babe, I love the way we work it out
That's what love is all about
               -Diamond Rio, Meet In The Middle

Quote:

I wonder if it's too early to think about wedding hairstyles...

  :o  *faint*

Congrats on your new showerhead!  

Btw, I like your new avatar. :)

Trisha: lol  ;D  *splashes some water on you*

La Diosa: Thanx! Though I can't say that I'm as thrilled with the new avatar as I am with the showerhead.  ;D  The latter of which, I've learned, does indeed have a swivel ball thingy in it. So all's well there.

Yesterday: Clarifying day. Again with Pantene purity shampoo (twice), a vinegar rinse, Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner and lots of cool water. I usually don't detangle my hair while it's wet on clarifying days, but yesterday I forgot and started spritzing the length with Pantene Light Spray Conditioner. Then I realized my mistake and wrung my hair out with a towel.
   My hair looked and felt parched and frizzy after it dried, but at least it dried straight. When I came home from work, I gathered a comb, a brush, a hand mirror and my fabric tape measure and headed into the bathroom to measure. I'm now at a disappointing 24¾."  :(

Last night, I went out all by myself for some dinner and shopping and I ended up buying 1.) movie tickets, 2.) a hair band made of small satin rope and tied in Celtic knots, and 3.) a new 100% BBB for $10!
   The bristles on the new BBB are much softer than my old one...but then, I suspect that my old one had nylon bristles mixed in. I rarely use BBB's or any other type of brush for that matter, but I figure that if the urge to use one ever strikes, I should have good ones in my possession.
   I'm not as impressed with the hair band. I'd had my eye on it for awhile, but it's too big and the knots are in the wrong place.  >:(
  The movie that I saw last night was called Fracture. Anthony Hopkins is my favourite actor and he plays one of the main characters in it. But it was only ok, IMO. The other main character reminded me of a young stage actor that I once knew (and had been emotionally involved with), and that really weirded me out. Weirder still is that the guy actually e-mailed me today out of the blue after a long silence. But that's a road I no longer travel.

Last night, I did a heavy EVOO, but kept waking up every hour or so because of the infernal sleep cap. I don't sleep well to begin with, but I guess putting something on my head only makes matters worse.

Today: The new showerhead rinses out overnight EVOO treatments much more effectively than its predecessor. I did the usual WCC with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, Ice Shine conditioner, then Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner.
   Speaking of Pantene S&C, while I was out yesterday, I noticed that their bottles have changed. The caps are now a lovely midnight blue with a silver band and the logo is different. Very nice.  8-)  I'd known that the Pantene bottles in UK looked like that in the UK, so I'd wondered if the US would follow suit. I wonder if all of the US formulas will change to become like the UK's new lineup as well.
   Anywho, detangled today with Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner, my oil solution and my broken RS #45. Didn't oil the ends separately. But it's dry and braided now. And I have a big trim scheduled for Sunday.

Things are awesome on the romance front, and today is my 2 year anniversary with the company that I work for.  :)

Not too much to report on the hair front. Today, I did a WWTC...washed twice with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, left the Deep Fortifying Treatment in for an hour, then rinsed and followed with Ice Shine conditioner. Didn't bother with leave-in's or wet detangling. Just let my hair dry, combed it out and left it down, which was a mistake. Without oil and leave-in conditioner, my hair simply cannot be left down to face the wind, movement and friction on its own. Like fine spiderwebs, my hair sticks to itself and starts to look stringy within minutes.

My skin is also noticeably dry after using Dial bodywash this morning instead of Softsoap.  :P  I guess it's obvious which one my skin prefers, so I'm not going to fight it. I wonder what would happen if one washed their hair regularly with bodywash. Would that spell instant disaster?  :-?

So, I guess I was supposed to start the CWC routine this month...wasn't that the plan? I don't even remember. Maybe not. In any case, I want to start doing that soon. Perhaps when my Ice Shine/DMR products are gone and I have to finish off what remains of my Restoratives Time Renewal collection.

In other news, I missed my dentist appointment yesterday.  >:(  I had 2 different sets of directions and both were way off. I ended up driving for 2 hours straight, getting hopelessly lost and running out of gas instead.  >:(  Guess I'll try to reschedule on Monday. Ugh! That just burns me up, though...

Tomorrow, another computer guru is coming over to hook my sister's laptop up to our wireless network. God, let it work this time!
   And Sunday is my trim. Oh goody.  :P  My hair needs it - I certainly don't want any more damage, but it also took me a looong time to reach 24¾."

Everything's still great on the romance front. Well...as great as things can be with over 2,000 miles between my lovely MI indie kid and myself. *sigh*

So yesterday was the big trim. I didn't bother washing my hair yesterday, as it was just going to end up covered in oil anyway. I rinsed it a lot in the shower, squeezed the water out with a microfiber towel and spritzed away, using Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and a pretty heavy oil solution.
   On trim days, I always oil my hair heavily because my scissor lady likes to pull a fine toothed comb through my hair and rip out whatever tangles occur.  :P  The oil lets her comb slip right through without any tangles.
   My measurement before the trim was 24¾." After, it was about 23¼." Not too terrible, but now I'm only ¼" ahead of where I was at the beginning of this year. Ah well. My hair needed it. And instead of the usual $5 for my trim, I left scissor lady $10. I might not be back.

Upon returning home, I rinsed my hair again, trying to get at least some of the oil out. I started the temperature out cool, then gradually made it colder and colder. The kind of cold that my ex bf used to call me insane for liking.  ;D
   After wringing the water out with a towel once more and letting my hair air dry, I found that it was still heavily saturated with oil. So after some struggling, I finally twisted it into a double bun updo and left it. It looked pretty terrible, but whatever.  :P

Yesterday was my mother's birthday, and we went to Applebee's for dinner. Not that spectacular and I had to go with greasy hair.  :P  My father also brought home an ice cream cake.

Sleeping was troublesome with all of that oil in my hair. I couldn't wait to get up this morning and wash it all out. Of course, I had to wait until everyone had left the house. I wanted to wash my hair twice, but that takes a bit longer in the shower. And taking longer makes people scream at me and shut off the water mane. Ahh, my loving family...  :P

In any case, I did get to do a WWCC today. Detangled with Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and my broken RS #45. No oil! And after it air dried, wouldn't you know it? It still feels a little bit greasy! So I'm totally not feeling the oil thing anymore, and won't be using any (at least as little as possible) for awhile. To be honest, I haven't really noticed a critical difference in my hair since I've been using it. So maybe my hair just doesn't need it.  :-?

When I got into work this afternoon, I asked my mother if she noticed anything different. She looked at me blankly. So I brought my hair up over the front of my shoulders and pointed to it. She asked what was different about it, and if I'd gotten it cut. She said that the ends looked like they'd been trimmed, but that my hair didn't look any shorter. She didn't believe that I'd lost any more than ½."  ;)

So all in all, I guess it really isn't that bad.  :)

Hair: Not much to report there. Still doing WCC's with Pantene Ice Shine S&C and Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Treating whenever I have the opportunity, which has been rare lately. I've done EVOO treatments for the past 2 nights.
   Yesterday, I rinsed out the heavy oil mix left over from my trim and made a new oil solution with just water, aloe vera gel and baby oil. It's quite heavy, so I'll have to dilute it if I wish to continue using it...which I'm still not sure about. I'm not feeling the oil thing and really never have. *shrug*

Health: Still malnourished and sleep deprived.  :(  Still having to make up for walks that I sometimes miss, but that's life or something like it. I'd like to walk 4 nights consecutively, but whether I have the will to make myself do it is another story.

Work: I had the morning shift both today and yesterday. Ugh.  :P  My body hates the early schedule...and my brain hates it just as much, if not more.
   I've also had to drive my father and homeless homeboy to work for the last 2 days, which I don't mind too much. It's just a bit awkward since it wasn't my choice and yesterday, our Canadian "house guest" flooded my entire car with the smell of smoke, as he'd jumped in right after having a cigarette.  >:(  I just love how smokers think that the stench miraculously disappears after their cancer stick is exhausted. *eye freaking roll* Anywho...there was an accident on the freeway this morning, turning a 20 minute drive into an hour-long wait, making me late for work. But that's life too.

Love: Ahhh yes...we're still quite strong. Every day, that child seems to find a new way to remind me that he is indeed the coolest guy ever. Of course we've talked about marriage (and that's something of an understatement *giggle*), though that would be a few years into the future, should it happen. Right now, we fret about the expenses (and dangers) of visiting one another in different states and go utterly mad with the frustrations of being apart. Even still, it's working and I thank God for that.

So that's about it for now, aside from also being worried sick about a friend of mine. I do hope that everything is alright...

Hair: Today was my first day doing a CWC this year. First time in a long time. I had to break a New Year's hair resolution to do it, but I haven't been keeping up with the other ones either. Oh well. But I haven't gone completely off the deep end. I'm still not allowing Suave shampoo to touch my hair at all. Just the cheap conditioners.
   Anyway, on Friday, I bought a bottle of Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner (which smells great! I'm on a total sweet-scented kick these days) to use as a light conditioner for CWC's. It seemed to work well enough. My hair didn't seem to suffer. And I was reminded that you can use less shampoo than usual when doing CWC's. I used my Ice Shine S&C and didn't have to worry about conditioning a 2nd time...I think it might have even saved me some time in the shower.  :D

However, I didn't really have time to see the full effect because my hair was swept into a double bun updo as soon as possible. The buns turned out better than usual...in perfect little cinnamon roll shapes. Then I clipped a black rose barrette with long black ribbons streaming from it on either side of the buns. And I did it all while viewing my head from the back with hand mirrors, rather than looking at it from the front. It actually turned out much better than usual. Everything just seemed to lay right (or at least good enough) and the overall effect was a lovely, gothic, Victorian-inspired updo.  :D  I even got a compliment on it from my sister.

Life, or lack thereof: Today, I reminded myself of a very important lesson: sunblock sucks!  :P  For whatever reason, I felt like putting myself together today and went into full summer goth mode...hair, clothes, makeup, jewelry, and lots of sunblock. Everywhere that flesh was exposed. But it still felt clammy and gross on my skin, it masked the sweet fragrance of my cotton candy body mist and made applying makeup difficult. But the big tip-off was when I'd moved the bracelets on my wrist and noticed a few black spots. Then I inspected my bracelets and found that the sunblock was literally eating the finish off of them!  :o  It had also eaten the luster off of my nail polish...thank goodness I'm due for a new manicure anyway.
   But in any case, one more reminder that, pale as I am and easily as I burn, sunblock just isn't the right choice for me. Not unless it's absolutely mandatory and there is no other alternative. For now, I suppose I will just continue to stay indoors during daylight hours and venture out at night like the nocturnal beast I am.  ;)  Perhaps I'll get a custom made parasol...or two!

Tonight is a walking night. I'll probably take the rose barrettes out of my hair, but I might try to leave the buns in. My walking clothes aren't clean. My parents have been home all day, so I really haven't had time to wash them. I can oly do so when they're gone. *sigh* Don't ask.

Love: All's well there, at least. *He* has found a new fire and sense of urgency about visiting me in SoCal. Usually, he would shy away from big challenges...but he isn't letting that happen this time. He's going to overcome everything that stands in his way, taking control of the situation instead of letting the situation control him. I haven't seen this sort of determination in him before...but as I've said, that child amazes me every day. He's grown, evolved and matured so much just in the few years that I've known him. It's great not only to see him realize himself and to help and guide him in any way that I can along the way, but also because of what it spells for us as a couple and for our future. I've said it many a time, but I do have a very good feeling about this...
 
*crossing all fingers and toes*

When I did the goth thing I too hated the yucky feel of sunblock.  So when I went out in the sun I wore black veils over my face and arms and carryed a spooky old parasol I found at goodwill.  The veils were part of a middle eastern dress that I put together from sheer black fabric. http://smilies.sofrayt.com/aiw/vampire.gif

Lisabelle: Oh the veils sound lovely! Too bad they offer zero actual sun protection.  :P  My style is decidedly more vintage-influenced, so I'm going to give the parasols a try. If that doesn't work, I'm going completely nocturnal. SoCal summers always make me want to. And lol @ the little bat graphic. How cute!  ;D

Hair: Decided to wash the entire length today - my hair just felt like it needed it. Especially after the sunblock day. Blegh!  :P  Conditioned twice afterwards with Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, since that was the one that I had the most of.
   Got distracted as I was getting dressed, dancing to Baby Got Back, and rather neglected my hair. It was so dry by the time I went to detangle it that it almost wasn't worth it. But I sprayed and sprayed and fought the tangles anyway. I used my oil solution on the length, so my hair was rather oily after it dried completely. Tomorrow is clarifying day, schedule permitting, so it should be ok.

Work: Crazy.  :P

Health: Weight still fluctuating a bit, but I am slowly getting lighter. What I really need to do is go on another junk food strike...or five. Nothing would motivate me more, of course, than to have a set date when my guy was going to be here. 15 lbs. in 2 weeks? Done! I'd take whatever measures necessary.
   Took my measurements last night and was horrified. I miss my little rock & roll figure...and I'm beginning to realize that I may never have it again. *sigh* Keep the faith, Angel.

Life: Meh.  :-/

Love: Still the same...strong, committed, amazing...and terribly far away.  :'(  No date set for *his* impending visit.

Hair: Tuesday = clarify. I like how soft my hair is after clarifying. No oil, no extra conditioning, just stripped down to its natural state. What I don't like is the fine dandruff that results. Perhaps I'll have to work scalp massages back into my daily routine, as they always did help my scalp to shed whatever dead skin and hair cells were on it.
   Anyway, I've brought a hairtie to work, so I'll probably work my hair into the usual braid when I finally get to leave my desk for awhile.

Health: Missed my walk last night. %&@$!!!  >:(  I'm in a perpetual state of making up for lost time it seems.

Life: What?  :P

Love: Still good. Still no visit scheduled.  :(

Work: Still crazy.

Today's routine was a CWCC with Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner, Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, Ice Shine conditioner and Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner.
   Detangled with Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and my broken RS #45. Whoa. My hair was very straight, soft and perfectly aligned. Each strand worked in harmony with the other. For whatever reason, my hair just seems to behave better when conditioned to the max. As if it has weight and substance, I suppose.
   It did feel a bit strange, having not washed the length, but that might be something that I just have to get used to.

Of course, I still wash all of my hair on days when I clarify or deep condition. But I figured that I would save my ends the trauma of being washed every single day and see if that affects the texture/colour/overall health of my hair. Hopefully, I will notice a difference by the end of the year. I'm also hoping to reach at least 26" by then...so we'll see.  :-/

Today was a standard WTC routine. Wash, treat, condition, using Ice Shine shampoo, the Intensive Moisturizing Mask and Ice Shine conditioner, all by Pantene, of course.
   I left the treatment in for over an hour and watched an episode of Discovery's Planet Earth...one of very few TV shows that I'm admittedly "hooked on." In fact, that's probably the only one. I don't care much for television, especially in this day and age.

Once all of that was taken care of, I got sidetracked by laundry and straightening up my bedchamber, so I neglected to detangle and oil and all that jazz and my hair ended up just drying naturally. Oh well.
   It was braided during my break at work anyway and will remain that way until tonight when I return from my walk.

As for everything else...bleh.  :P  The long-distance pseudo "relationship" is still on, though I'm wading through some pretty serious trust challenges right now. Don't get me wrong, I trust that my friend's feelings are true...at least, I think I do. But his actions are sometimes another story, and don't support the emotional aspect at all. Love is an action, not just a feeling. And you have to talk the talk and walk the walk...because one of either on its own is not enough. We've talked about this, and *he* claims to understand...but only time can deliver proof. Until then, I'll stay cautious and wary.

Today is payday, so I should feel happy. Right? But for whatever reason(s), I'm just not as excited about it as usual. I've had a lot on my mind of late, which scrambles my emotions and saps my energy. But at least I have enough hindsight to know that things will work themselves out and I'll be alright in the end. For now, I'll just keep praying.

Hair: Well, the past 3 days have been CWC's, and I must say that I am liking the results. The length is noticeably softer and more agreeable with just conditioner and water passing over it. Who knew that all of that washing would be unnecessary? Oh hush...I'm still relatively new at this and stubborn in my old habits.  ;)  I still think it's rather dirty not to wash every last inch every single day, given everything that hair comes into contact with on a daily basis. In general, I'm a very clean person, so the idea of not washing all of my hair each day is...taking some getting used to.  :P  But this CWC thing seems to be working alright, at least for now. I like how soft it feels in the shower now too. Ahhhh....
   Today I actually oiled the ends while my hair was still wet, and they dried without being too terribly greasy. I have been considering using a different type of oil when all of my baby oil (with aloe & vitamin E) is gone. The bottle is nearly empty now, and I'm wondering what other sort of oil I should use. EVOO has proven far too heavy for daily use and has been all but confined to heavy overnight oilings. Perhaps a light olive oil? Something that I could pick up at a grocery or chain store would be ideal since I shop there anyway. I'm not taking a separate trip to a bloody health/specialty/organic food store and paying out the nose for jojoba. That just isn't my scene.
   So what else? I've more or less decided that an accurate description of my hair colour is "peanut butter and honey." lol Demure light brown with just enough gold and red to keep it from being "mousy." And that's just fine with me...although I pray that if heaven accepts me when I leave this world, the good Lord will finally give me the long raven waves that I'd pined for in life. With a silver halo and a set of black wings to match, eh?  ;)

Life: Dentist appointment on Thursday. I'm looking forward to it but am somewhat afraid of what they'll say.
   The weekend was pretty lame. My face exploded with blemishes and I didn't wish to be seen in public. I spent all of yesterday cleaning...to the point of total exhaustion, and nearly starved myself into a hypoglycemic attack.  :P  I was supposed to walk last night but just didn't have the energy.
   I finally did get the mirrored closet doors in my room clean though. They hadn't been touched in a good 3 years at least...and I didn't even want to think about what my ex had gotten on them while he'd lived there.  :P  And just as I'd convinced myself that my room was finally purged of his presence, my father walked into the hallway and announced that my ex was there! He'd just shown up at my house at random! Talk about coincidence...
   But it actually turned out to be somewhat convenient, as I got to give back his old camera that my father had found in one of our sheds and given to me. I was either going to sell it or ship it back (though I didn't have the address of his parents' house, where he'd been staying). So his visit saved me the hassle.
   As many of you may recall, he nearly killed himself in a motorcycle accident last year. No one was really sure what would become of him, but he has now made a near complete recovery. He said that he still has some vision and memory problems (granted, his memory was crap before the accident), but otherwise he seems fine. He can drive and get around normally, and is actually moving back to San Diego and looking for work. Today, he's going back to his former employer to visit and see if they might possibly rehire him.
   All of this probably sounds like great news. My mother was quite sentimental yesterday, gushing about how he was a "walking miracle" and "second family," etc. etc. But I really can't get behind that. I'll admit that he's very lucky to have survived and recovered. I won't say that he doesn't deserve that kind of luck because Someone obviously thinks that he does. All things happen for a reason, I guess. But that doesn't take away from the fact that he brought all of his misfortune on himself. I bear him no ill-will, of course...I just think that it's important to acknowledge the choices he has made and the consequences that resulted.

Love: Still going. Probably always will. Regardless of whatever obstacles come our way, we manage to stick together. *He* is my partner and best friend, and somehow, what we have is stronger than anything else. In the bible, Corinthians 13:7 says that love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things. I need look no farther than my own faith and my own heart to know that we have love as it's meant to be.
   Trust is slowly coming back around, although it never completely disappeared. It gets strained and weakened at times, but the trick is having it strong enough that it bends rather than breaks. I want it back completely, like it was before, but I also understand that I cannot rush it. It will come back as it's meant to with time, patience and much nurturing. Oh yes, and faith. I pray that my feelings will all return 100%, as they were in the beginning, by the time *he* finally makes it out for a visit. Still no date set...

Quote:

Corinthians 13:7 says that love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things. I need look no farther than my own faith and my own heart to know that we have love as it's meant to be.

You know it, sistah!!  8-)

Quote:

You know it, sistah!!  8-)

Yes I do.  8-)

Just a few quick notes.
   Today was clarifying day. The usual routine of Pantene Purity shampoo, vinegar rinse, 2nd Purity shampoo wash, then a combination of Pantene Ice Shine and Daily Moisture conditioners. I put the last of each in the same bottle to finish them off.
   No leave-in's or wet detangling. Just air dried.

A few effects I have noticed since I've begun CWC-ing regularly are 1.) softer hair!! 2.) the disappearance of the chemical rash on the back of my neck. It has completely healed!  :D

OMG, never buy Wal*Mart's own brand of microwave popcorn!  :P  I just tried a bag in the microwave in my office and rather than popping normally, the kernels fused together in black charcoal chunks, terribly burned and smoking when I took the bag out. :o  Now the stench of burnt popcorn hangs thickly throughout the entire building! I placed the bag outside and opened the door so the place can air out, but omg...  :P

Maybe I'll go hang out at the cove for awhile after work so my hair doesn't smell like burnt popcorn all night.  :P

Bye for now.

So yesterday, I did make it to the cove after work. I walked along the shoreline and let the salty sea winds toss my hair around. Good for getting rid of the burnt popcorn smell...bad for spiderweb strands that tangle easily.  :(  I lost more than a few hairs trying to work out that rat's nest. But I did an overnight EVOO treatment to restore the moisture lost to wind and tangles.

Today's routine was a WTC. Washed with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo then left the Deep Fortifying Treatment in for an hour, during which I washed all of my combs in the kitchen sink. When my sister came in and saw what I was doing, she asked why.
   "To get all of the oil and bacteria off of them," I told her. Then, in her I-have-an-associate's-degree-and-you-don't tone of voice, she said, "I hate to tell you this but...you have bacteria all over your body."
   "Doesn't mean it has to be all over my combs," I shrugged.  ::)  Poor kid. She just doesn't get it.
   I am alone in my quest for long, healthy hair. But then, I'm alone in everything that I set out to do.

Anyway, after that, I rinsed out the treatment and followed with the very last of my Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Detangled with Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner and my oil solution and let it air dry as I rushed off early to work. During my break, I combed my hair out and wove it into a braid as usual. There it stayed until after my walk this evening.

In other news, this morning, I was asked to housesit for my aunt and uncle for the first time this year. I'll be there Sunday through Tuesday, and I am in dire need of some freedom!!

Things are still strong on the long-distance romance front, though I still have no idea when he'll finally make it out for a visit. *sigh!*

Oy! What a day... I can't remember the last time I needed a Friday this badly.  :P

For whatever reason, I forgot to set my alarm last night and woke up an hour late.  :o  So there was no time to take a shower. Had to just wash my face, get dressed and go straight to work. I had a dentist appointment afterward, and I was afraid that I was going to be late for that too, considering that my mother was late to the office and I still had to stop at home and brush my teeth first. Fortunately, I made the appointment on time and things went pretty well. The dentist said that I had a great set of teeth.  :)
   However, I was out of gas when I reached the dentist's office and had to drive all the way back to my hometown before I could stop at the bank and then get gas. I was hoping against hope that my poor little car (which was running on fumes by then) wouldn't simply die in the middle of the road somewhere along the way. Of course, when I arrived at the gas station, every single pump was taken, so I had to sit there and wait with my engine running...without a/c because I needed to conserve fuel...in the scorching SoCal sun.  >:(
   After that, I stopped at Target to pick up a few things before heading back home. It was almost 4:00 pm by that point and I still hadn't had a shower, so I was a greasy mess.  :P  
   So after putting away the stuff that I'd brought home from the store, I jumped into the shower without hesitation. OMG, did I need it! Though I didn't wash my hair because I was going power walking only hours later...so I did a COW with my Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner. Left it on for the duration of my shower, then rinsed with tons of cool water. No detangling or anything - just let my hair air dry, then wove it into a braid before my walk.

Tonight, I'm going to do another heavy overnight EVOO treatment, followed by a WTC tomorrow morning. Speaking of which, after the day I've had, I'm exhausted. So I'll see what I can do about sleep. G'night, all!

Well, I'm back...so to speak.

For the past few days, I've been housesitting and nursing the worst chemical burn that I have ever sustained. Housesitting was easy. The chemical burn has been death. It covered 100% of my left arm from wrist to shoulder and 95% of the right. Just horrible. But, I am on the mend. The rash has scabbed over and has healed considerably in just a matter of days. The first day, I'd be in tears and screaming pain if I tried to wash my arms by hand. Today, I used a washcloth and it wasn't terrible. I'll probably do that for a few days while all of the little pinhole scabs heal before going back to my mesh poofs. When the nerves have healed enough, I'll finally begin doing oil-free sugar scrubs just so my skin can come back smooth and regenerated.
   I also hope that I'll be able to use lotion again soon because the skin is very dry and smells...werid.  :P  Like damaged skin. It's too messed up to hold fragrances at the moment, so even after washing, it just smells weird. Like a burn victim. Bleh.  :P  It doesn't look so great either, and wearing sleeves to work completely sux.

Needless to say, my hair routines and aspirations have taken a backseat, along with everything else, while my arms recuperate. Today, I did a CWC. Yesterday, I was in too much pain to do anything but just wash and condition. And the day before that, I clarified.
   This morning, I killed off my bottle of Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal conditioner. I still have about 1/5 of the shampoo left and I'm not sure whether I want to buy more Time Renewal or just keep buying Ice Shine since it's been working so well and just add the rest of my Time Renewal shampoo to my car wash tonight. hehe We'll see.

As for my power walking, it's been canceled until my arms have healed completely. I can't even imagine how they'd handle the heat and sweat in their current condition. So that's out for awhile, unfortunately.
   Good news is, I can finally type and talk on the phone, along with other light tasks, without screaming and crying in complete agony.

Anyway, that's all for now. It's almost quittin' time.

Hope your arm feels better soon!

Oh blessed mother, Angel Spun, What happened?? I hope you heal soon and get back to being your normal, non-burned, pain free self!    

OMG! :o  I hope your feeling better. (hugs)

omg!!! You poor thing!  I hope you feel better quick!  I'll send some healing white light your way.  Hope it helps :)

Holy Crap!  What happened??  I'm glad you're on the mend...cetaphil brand lotion may be helpful, no scent and designed for sensitive skin.  I use it on my face and whole body on my super sensitive skin.  You can get it at pretty much any drugstore, Wal-Mart or Target store.

I hope you heal up right quick!

OWIE!   :(  Yes, tell us what happened?  *gentle hugs*

Aww, thanx, everybody! *careful hugs* :D

As for what happened, it was a disaster with a chemical depilatory which I had never used before. The acids in it were very strong and ate through my skin, exposing raw nerves and severely damaging the epidermis. When time came to remove the stuff, the top layer of my skin was so dissolved that its texture resembled melty wax and the washcloth that I used to remove everything actually put holes in the damaged skin. The pain of it was excruciating as one might imagine, and I spent most of the day lying in bed with my arms spread out at my sides, trying in vain to fall asleep just to escape it all.  :P  As with many types of burn injuries, I developed fever symptoms as well. Certainly not an experience that I care to repeat.

Today I am doing much better, though. So all of your well wishes and healing white light have been working and I greatly appreciate it.  :)  For as severe an injury as it was, it has made remarkable progress in recovering.
   As for treatment, at this point, there's nothing that I can do except what I have been doing. Topical solutions are out of the question for the time being due to a.) exposed nerves and b.) the nature of burn injuries. They generate large amounts of heat and skin cannot heal properly with something covering it and preventing the heat from escaping. Fortunately, the latter problem is nearly solved, so the only real issue now is the nerve endings. I have to wear sleeves at work and it suuuucks.  :P
   But the red, festering boyles have pretty much disappeared and the pinhole scabs from the washcloth are shrinking. With any luck, there will be little to no scarring. When the epidermis has healed completely, I'll begin doing regular sugar scrubs.

Today, I had to clean my arms with a washcloth again. I could scrub a little harder on the right arm because its nerves are more recovered than those of the left. The left arm sustained almost twice the damage, so even going over it with a washcloth still feels like being poked with stinging nettles.  :P  Good news is, the weird burned skin smell has also gone away either completely or near completely. My skin still cannot hold fragrance, but at least the godawful weird smell isn't there anymore.

As for my hair, well, I've had a bit of fun with that lately.  ;)  Now that my arms have their full mobility back, I can do pretty much whatever I want with my hair. So yesterday, I stopped at Target on the way home from work and was delighted to find an entire section of brand new Pantene products! *giggle*  ;D  Oh, I was like a kid in a candy store, going down the aisle, picking out every new product that I wanted to try and throwing it in my basket (I want this...and this...and this!). Fun! What I ended up with were big bottles of my beloved Ice Shine S&C, Pro-V Fortifying deep fortifying treatment, Nourishing moisture replenishing mask and Silkening silk transformation crème. I'm still giddy about all of it even though there are a few more things I want to pick up!  :D

This morning, I did a CWC with my Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner and Pantene Ice Shine S&C. On a whim, I decided not to do any wet detangling and instead, just ran the Silkening crème through my strands while still damp and just let them air dry. As I was driving to work, I kept playing with my hair and realized immediately how silky the ends were. It was all dry enough by the time I reached the office that I could comb it out right then and there. OMG, I am pleased! Very, very pleased! I might give up wet detangling altogether with these results!  :D

As for the long-distance romance, it's still strong as ever. Had a quarrel a few days ago which strained things quite a bit, but we snapped back together as always. I can honestly say that no one else has addressed and resolved my concerns like this kid. It demands a certain level of care and commitment that few can put forth...yet *he* does it all without batting an eye. How he puts up with all of my demands and insecurities, I'll never know, but his devotion is divinely awesome and inspiring. lol Sorry for the sentimental hogwash, but I must give credit where it's due.  ;)
   While on the subject, *his* impending visit to SoCal has been rescheduled for July. God willing.

Anyway, while at Target yesterday, I also picked up a few new nail polishes. Maybelline actually makes a solid black now called Onyx Rush and you best believe that went in my basket along with all of my Pantene goodies. hehe  ;D  I'm due for a mani-pedi, but I think I'll go with a metallic black for now.

Despite having to wake up at the buttcrack of dawn (with only 2 hours' sleep) for the early shift at work, it's actually starting out as a pretty good day. Hope that pattern continues!

I'm so glad you're doing better!  If you can find it, colliodal silver might be something to keep on hand to treat your burns.  I know you've mentioned that you can get burned from other stuff too.  Silver has long been a treatment for burns-colliodal silver can be applied topically or taken orally.  You'll find it in a healthfood store.

Good Luck!

Glad to hear the godd news all around!! ;)

Oh my god, Angel, how horrible.   :(  I hope you heal quickly.

Quote:

new Pantene products

I have to tell you about my brother in law (BIL), the truck driver, who is living with us....he did some shopping yesterday and got home shortly after I did.  He said he had run out of his usual Aussie Mega shampoo that he's been using for years.  Apparently Aussie doesn't make that particular type of shampoo anymore.  I suppose, like a lot of other brands, they've revamped their product lines.  Anyway, he looked over the other brands and ended up choosing Pantene.   :)  My husband looked at me and said, "Is Pantene all right?"  --Like now I'm the shampoo expert or something!   ;D  I said "Yes, it's fine" and told them about a gal on the long hair site who experiments with other brands but always returns to her Pantene!  (hmm, wonder who I was talking about?!)  
8-)

Sakina: Colliodal silver sounds familiar somehow. I think the hospital gave it to my ex in topical form when he burned himself in a welding accident. I'm pretty sure that I even borrowed it once for a chemical burn on the back of my neck, but it wasn't very effective.
   Fortunately, the burn part is over. My recovery has been remarkably quick, and now all that remains is some nerve damage, rough skin and scabs. Countless little scabs.
   Today, I was actually able to put lotion on my right arm and it seemed appreciative. I rinsed it off awhile later, but the smoothing effects remained. Skin still cannot hold a fragrance, but that's ok.
   The left arm has a ways to go yet before it catches up. It still has a little bit of the weird damaged skin smell. Nevertheless, I was able to wash both with my mesh poofs this morning. I should be healed in no time.  :)

Trisha: LOL If I go down for that one, then I'm pulling Maggie down with me. She does the exact some thing.  ;D  But hey, when something works for your hair...  ;)
   I'm just flattered that you would actually tell your BIL about me. hehehe

Speaking of Pantene, has anyone seen their website lately? Gorgeous! Elegant design, tasteful graphics, easy navigation. I'm loving their new changes this time around! The products, the site, the packaging (love those new midnight blue caps!  ;)), everything.

Yesterday, I picked up the Pro-V Detangling Light Conditioning Mist and the Moisturizing Essential Hydrating Rinse. Yes, it's an addiction...but a healthy one.  ;)

Today was sort of the "ultimate hair day." I first washed with my Ice Shine shampoo, then treated for over an hour and a half with the old version of the Moisturizing Essential Hydrating Rinse (not the new one that I just  bought). I'm going to try and use up all of my old Pantene stuff before breaking into the new. I have also decided that the next time I'm in the market for a new S & C, I'm going to give the Full & Thick formulas a try.
   Anyway, after rinsing the treatment out, I conditioned with Ice Shine conditioner and then again with the Cabellina horse conditioner that had been taking a siesta under my bathroom sink. I'm going to try and finish off that bottle as quickly as possible too.
   After squeezing the water out with my microfiber towel, I sprayed on both Pantene Detangling Light Spray Conditioner and my oil solution and detangled with my broken RS #45. I'm thinking about replacing it and at least one of my Conair seamless combs with a few seamless combs by the Creative company. Random thought.  :P
   I oiled the ends and just left my hair down today...unintentionally. By sheer chance, I forgot to bring a hairtie with me to work, so I couldn't braid. Then, I remembered that it was the 1st of the month and therefore measure day. So it actually turned out to be a good thing. I'll measure up when I get home. God, is this year just flying by or what?? Before too long, the Halloween displays will be up everywhere and I'll be carving pumpkins and buying Christmas ornaments.  :D  The very thought of it makes me giddy. Ohh, how long will my hair be at the end of this year? hehe

Anyway, that's about it aside from missing my guy.  :(  He's babysitting his cousins tonight, so I don't know when I'll get to talk to him. *sigh* Ah well.

Everybody, have a fun, safe, relaxing, productive, inebriated or otherwise weekend.  ;)

angel spun, glad your arm is doing a little better. that sounds terrible! i had that happen once on my face when i tried to get rid of the tiny hairs above my mouth. now i just let them do their thing, since my skin's too sensitive. hope you heal up all the way soon!

Thanx, RTG.  :)

Hair: For the past 3 days, I've been doing CWC's as usual with Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner and Pantene Ice Shine S & C. Over the weekend, I decided to experiment with a new detangling method. I spritzed the length as usual with Pantene Detangling leave-in conditioner + my oil solution and simply worked it in with my fingers. No combing. Then, I just let it air dry, and it seemed to work ok. Especially since it all just went back into a braid anyway. Didn't really matter.
   Today, I wet combed the length. I still prefer that method as it distributes the leave-in's more evenly, but I always worry about pulling a comb (even a seamless one) through my fragile hair. I'm paranoid now about breakage.  :(

Arms: Still healing, although the progress seems to be slowing now. This morning, I did the first oil-free sugar scrub on the right arm and it came out quite smooth. It did uncover some of the unpleasant "burned skin" smell at first, but that seems to have faded.
   The left still has several scabs, but the rough patches seem to have disappeared. I'm going to hold off on doing the sugar scrubs on it until next week. Since it sustained almost twice as much damage as the right arm, it will need more time to heal.
   Yesterday, I was able to put lotion on both of them and leave it on all day. It felt clammy but seems to have helped a bit. Little hairs are beginning to grow back. In general, my arms are starting to look like arms again.

Other: A few of my WA relatives left days ago, but my grandfather is still here. He and my father have been getting a lot of projects done around the house.
   Last night, we all went to watch an ice skating show that my cousins performed in. Afterwards, the group of us (9 in all) went out for a bite. I had a huge slice of chocolate mocha ice cream pie that everyone had to help me finish, and it didn't do any favours for my stomach.  :P
   The long-distance whatever is strained yet again. *sigh* I know that every time it seems like we'll never work our way out of something, we do. But I've been recognizing an unhealthy and unnecessary pattern that will prevent things from becoming more serious than they are. As it is now, I don't feel like talking to him or about it. But it's definitely not a good thing if he intends to come out and visit me in a month.
   My manicure is already beginning to chip off and look worn. I don't know if I'm bummed about that or not because I don't really like the colour anyway. I bought a lovely Sally Hansen colour called Pat On The Black the other day which I can't wait to try. I might do both my fingers and toes to match and see how it holds up.

Anyway, that's about it. Not happy today but not feeling like the world is going to end either. Just sort of...meh.  :P

No advice.  Just  *HUGS*

Thanx, Trisha. *hugs back*

Yesterday was a clarifying day. Hair stayed down because I forgot a hairtie and just didn't feel like braiding it.
   Today, I was hoping to do a treatment but woke up too late. So I did a CWCC and ran the Pantene Silkening crème through my hair while it was still damp. No spraying, no combing, nothing. Just air dried. Hair is down today as well and feels just a bit gummy from the leave-in.  :-/  I also washed my satin pillowcases and hung them up to dry. Satin dries amazingly fast.

This morning also saw the 2nd sugar scrub on my right arm. Again, it uncovered a little bit of that "damaged skin" smell and again, it faded. But my skin is smooth and almost completely recovered. Next week, I'll work on the left.

The guy and I have been talking. We both want the long-distance-pseudo-whatever to be restored to its fullest, but only God can say whether that will happen or not. I'd like to think that He will help us do what needs to be done to save the romance since He arranged it in the first place. But God helps those who help themselves, and I'm at a loss for what to do. I'll not rush things. But I do want everything to work out. *sigh* Something's telling me to remember Faith, Hope and Love...and the greatest is Love. Guess we'll see if that helps somehow.

This is what I brought you, this you can keep
This is what I brought - you may forget me
I promise you my heart, just promise to sing
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep
                      -AFI, Prelude 12/21

Thursday: CWC with Suave toasted vanilla & honey conditioner and Pantene Ice Shine S&C. I'm running out of my Pantene leave-in, which is a combination of Detangling Light Spray Conditioner and Resotratives Strengthening Spray. Wet detangled almost all of my hair, even part of the crown, and oiled the ends.

Friday: WTCC with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo followed by a deep conditioner that I mixed up: 1 tsp. EVOO, 1 tsp. aloe vera gel, 1 tsp. honey, 4 tsp. Pantene Intensive Restoration Treatment. Nuked for 11 seconds, applied after washing and towel drying and left on for an hour. Rinsed and chased with Ice Shine conditioner and Cabellina horse conditioner...the latter of which I am thankfully almost out of.
   Wet detangled as much as possible and oiled the ends. Braided as usual.
   Also did the last sugar scrub for the week on my right arm. It's pretty well healed. I will begin the sugar scrubs on my left arm next Monday, as most of the scabs and nerve damage on it have healed as well.

Saturday: CWCC with Suave toasted vanilla & honey conditioner, Pantene S&C and Cabellina horse conditioner. Wet detangled the length with Pantene leave-in, my oil solution and my broke RS #45 comb. Didn't oil the ends (whoops) as I was sidetracked by makeup. But I did braid...poorly.  :P  At least it's out of the way.

Other: The boy apologized for upsetting me (again) and we worked things out (again). Phew! I'm getting tired of this bloody roller coaster. Let's hope for much less drama in the future.
   My grandfather left this morning to return to WA. Earlier than planned, but he'd fallen under the weather and had gotten homesick.  :(  I guess he'll be back in October.
   My surrogate parents from KS are here, along with their daughter and her two daughters. I haven't seen them yet since they've been in town. Hopefully soon...
   Finally got around to the much needed mani-pedi. Blackberry on the fingers, black on the toes. Verrry shiiiny...
   Also, I think that I may have found the perfect hairstyle for my next wedding.  ;D

Hope everyone's enjoying their weekend.  :)

There's that "W" word again!!!   :o  *faint*

Trisha: Eeeeasy, dearie. *fans you* No rush now. I never said it was tomorrow.  ;)

Hair: Tuesday = clarifying day. The usual method of a Pantene Purity wash, vinegar rinse, another Purity wash. Then conditioned once with Pantene Ice Shine conditioner and left it in for about 30 (?) seconds before rinsing it out.
   No leave-ins, sprays, oils, combs. Nothin.' Just let it air dry as I went about my morning "routine." Now it's finally braided. All of the broken ends that poke out everywhere along the length are still a significant source of depression for me. I think about them a lot and feel helpless because I have no idea how they got there, and therefore no idea how to prevent more.  :(

Other: Monday was rough, so no sugar scrub for the left arm. Today, I just didn't have time. So hopefully I'll get around to it tomorrow. There just aren't enough hours in the day, man.  :P
   In addition to laundry, clarifying, shaving and straightening up my room, I also managed to put myself together this morning. Makeup, jewelry...all that. I miss that whole æsthetic. And I want to start getting used to doing it all again. hehe And a co-worker just told me that I "look very pretty today."
   The long-distance love thang is still going. Right now, my guy's practicing with the indie band that he just quit. He promised them one more show, and then he's done. Maybe after this, he'll think more seriously about finding steady work. *sigh*
   So far as I know, he's still on for next month. Faithless as it sounds, I'm hoping that he won't do anything to ruin his chances. I promised myself when we began this...whatever it is...that I wouldn't wait a year. Now I've waited 9 months and after being let down so many times, I stay both hopeful and skeptical at the same time. Oh, I'm excited for it and all, but I have enough disappointment behind me to stay in reality.

Anyway, that's it for today.

Sometimes letting go is harder than holding on... but good luck on TheBoy's visit anyway. Sometimes I think hair breaks, just to annoy us. My best advice is trim them off when you see them so they don't grow, especially with your fine hair, they'll tangle and break more. But then you knew that. *hug* Keep on going and everything will work out, TheBoy, TheHair, TheBurn, everything.

Kiraela: Amen. Your words are a comfort in an otherwise hectic situation. I appreciate them more than you know. *big hugs, little sis*  :)

Smoothness: Yesterday, I finally began the sugar scrubs on my left arm, and did both a salt and sugar scrub on the right. Not a trace of that burned, damaged skin smell. The right arm is healed; the left still has some small patches of scar tissue where the scabs used to be. All of the baby hairs are still sprouting up. Everything is almost back to normal.
   In addition, I also mixed up a deep conditioning treatment of EVOO, aloe vera gel, honey and Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal Replenishing Mask. I'm still trying to get rid of all of my old Pantene products before I start using the new.
   Anyway, I washed all of my hair once with Ice Shine shampoo, squeezed the water out with my microfiber towel, applied the deep conditioner and left it in for the usual hour while I washed my combs and such. After rinsing out the treatment, I conditioned with Ice Shine conditioner and Cabellina horse conditioner (which is finally almost gone).
   After rinsing and towel drying again, I sprayed my Pantene leave-in and my oil solution all over the length and back of my head and combed out.
   Smooth hair, smooth arms...who could ask for more?  ::)

Tiredness: I didn't post much yesterday due to severe anxiety...or panic...or both.  :P  It wasn't fun, but I'm a little better today. One drawback to us creative types is all of the drama that goes along with it. You have to take the bad with the good, I guess.
   The past few nights have been spent with very little sleep, so this morning, I'm thoroughly exhausted and even almost nodded off while driving to work.  :o  Hopefully, I'll be able to take a nap when I get home. Hopefully. *sigh*

The Rest: My surrogate parents from KS came over for dinner last night with their oldest daughter and her two daughters. It was great seeing all of them again, and the kids took to me immediately as children often do, so it was cool hanging out with them. They said that I looked to be about 15 and were shocked when I told them my real age.  ;D  Everyone really liked my room as well. And I finally got to give them some pictures that I'd owed them for years, and had been sitting in my armoire for quite awhile.
   Other big news...after 4 long years, my little sister finally got her braces taken off. I can't even imagine the relief that must be. hehe It's weird seeing her without them, but my God, her teeth look better than mine do.

Anyway, that's about it. Things are going. I only wish that I could make the small pinches of worry-induced nausea go away.  :P

Here's hoping all the worry and sleeplessness go'way quickly   :(

I know all about anxiety and nervousness...and sleeplessness...I feel for you.  Wish I had some good suggestions for you.  Good luck and I hope you feel better really soon.

Trish & Jdog: *hugzzz* Love you guys. Thanx.
   Sleep is coming back. I'm averaging about 7 hours per night now, which is pretty amazing for me. Anxiety & nausea are still present, and I suppose they will be until I'm able to confront and address my worries as they require.

Out With The Old, In With The New: That seems to be the theme for this weekend. Yesterday, during the usual WTC for Friday, I finished off my Pantene Restoratives Time Renewal Replenishing Mask, Cabellina horse conditioner and my Pantene spray leave-in. I also killed a bottle of bodywash in there somewhere as well.
   The 2nd sugar scrub on my left arm emptied my bottle of Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner. Out with the old, damaged skin cells, in with healthy arms.
   Thursday afternoon, I discovered 3 unused gift cards in my purse, totaling over $100!  :D  So my objective this weekend has been to find something to spend them on! Out with old gift cards, in with cool new stuff! Besides, I could use a little shopping therapy. I want to feel excited and happy about something for crying out loud.
   I also have $15 in Best Buy Rewards that I think I'll put toward a new CD. Out with small pieces of paper cluttering my room, in with fresh, new music!
   And I have to say that if my long distance "lover" (yes, I have to use quotations with him now too...isn't that sad?) doesn't get a grip, he's going to find himself among the old things happily replaced.  >:(

In Other News: My surrogate relatives from KS went home a few days ago.  :(  I was planning to go up to LA (Los Angeles, not Louisiana) with my sister this afternoon for our 2nd cousin's b-day, but she couldn't get anyone to cover her shift tonight. Ah well. Once again, this cataclysmic roller coaster of a supposed pseudo-relationship seems to have careened out of control. As if it lept from its track and is hanging frozen and suspended in mid air, and I have no idea whether it's going to sprout wings and fly or come crashing down, or if the ride is simply over and it's just time to step off. Not a pleasant place to be, regardless. Such is the source of my constant anxiety. If I stay busy or unconscious, I can push it to the back of my mind. So that's my plan of attack to keep me from going progressively crazier until I can talk to the boy. Thinking of him and our situation makes me ill.  :P

Alright, enough of my typical angsty melodrama. I need a shower. Hope everybody's having a better weekend than I am!  :P

Good luck with everything*hug* I hope for you and your sanity's sake, that the relationship with theboy hops grows wings, or at least gives you a parachute before falling.  And I also hope you buy some completely awesome stuff when you go shopping.

Aww Angel, hang in there. What is meant to be will, what is not will not.  As someone said to me recently, God will not give you more than you can handle.  Personally, somedays I think he is trying to make me invinsible...but whatever...who am I to judge.

JD

Thanx, Kiraela & Jdog.

Hair: Well, I am on my 3rd day of CWC's as usual for a Monday. Tomorrow I will clarify and the whole weekly process will repeat itself. It's monotonous, but that's ok if it's working, I guess.

Shopping: Since my guy (if I can even still call him that) was not available over the weekend, I had a lot of time to myself. So I finally used my gift certificates and my Best Buy Rewards. With the former, I got a great new shirt, a dark chocolate & raspberry Godiva bar and a huge set of gorgeous flatware that I'd had my eye on for years, which just happened to be on sale.  ;)
   At Best Buy, I bought not one, but 3 new CD's: AFI - Decemberunderground, Offspring - Smash and Radiohead - Amnesiac. Decemberunderground is in my car stereo right now and has been pretty good so far. I haven't listened to it all the way through. I love the dark æsthetic that the band carries out.

Health: Arms are doing better all the time. Save for a few recovering bug bites, the right one is pretty normal again. On Sunday, I did the final sugar scrub on the left and wouldn't you know it? The damaged skin smell returned just a little. Today it's faint, but still there. I think I'll let it recover for another week or so before moving onto the salt scrub.
   Sleep has gone down yet again. Now I'm in the 4-5 hour realm and wake up with that awful sick, sinking feeling in my stomach. Anxiety is almost constant, and for whatever reason, it seems to peak when I need to eat or drink something, so I have to fight it in order to do so. I've been watching videos and listening to music as a means of either coping or escaping. Talking to friends helps a lot, as I really just need a sympathetic ear and some honest advice.

The Boy: Ugh. Guys. The root of my every major distress. If I ever meet one who is completely devoted and honest, I think I'll pass out. To me, they're as mythological as mermaids and unicorns, only not nearly as pretty.  ::)
   My guy? Yeah, it feels strange and uncomfortable calling him that now as he certainly doesn't seem to deserve the title. In any case, I've been struggling with this for days and haven't found any relief, so I'm going to go against proper relationship etiquette and spill the beans. Any comments/advice/insight/insults are welcome. I hope that he will forgive me, but I'm at wit's end and at a loss as to how to deal.
   So here's what happened...on Thursday morning, he told me that he wouldn't be around over the weekend, as he had plans. Just things like museums, aquariums, cookouts, etc. He was also having a terrible allergic fit and ended up having to lie down suddenly. He slept for about 14 hours straight before waking up late at night and staying awake until about 5 am. I didn't hear from him at all until late Saturday afternoon, when I called him, though I was very brief and distant and actually ended up hanging up on him.  :-[  I called back later that night and we argued. In the process, he said that he thought he needed to let me go and admitted that he'd been holding back certain details of his outings to prevent me from getting jealous.
   Now let me say this...he's one of those guys who has a lot of female friends (though he has assured me in the past that I was the only person whom he was interested in). One of them, a family friend (I presume) from out of state, came to visit him on Thursday and on through the weekend and was staying at his house. This is why he was unavailable all weekend. He had told me a little about what he would be doing, but purposely did not mention whom he'd be doing it all with, as he thought that I would be jealous. I suppose that I should mention, for the record, that this "friend" does have a romantic interest in my guy. She posts little messages on his MySpace page almost every day and they talk a great deal.
   Anyway, thanx to his MySpace page, I already knew that this gal would be visiting. She even went so far as to publicly count down the days until she would see him. It's sickening.
   So that's the deal. He's been tooling around town for days with an out of state friend who has the hots for him and pretty much ignorning me in the process. Now, I understand that he's busy with this company that he doesn't see very often right now and doesn't have much time left over, so it's not like I'm totally heartless about it all. However, given the circumstances and the way he's been handling them, I definitely have my suspicions. Am I being selfish and unfair or do I have reasonable cause to worry? My trust really isn't what it used to be and he has broken it down little by little at times, but never so severely as this, I don't think. The fact that he feels the need to leave things out is probably what bothers me most. Second to that is the fear that he might have feelings for this "friend." It worries me to think that she might try something...and that he might let her get away with it. I definitely feel that my trust has been violated.
   So I'm a complete mess and there's why. I don't normally rant this much, but I'm tired of feeling this way. Plus, I trust my long-haired family here more than, say, psychotherapy.  :P

Anyway, there it is. I feel guilty for putting it all out in the open like this...but I wanted people to understand what I was going through rather than assuming that I was nuts. Maybe I am anyway...

No, trust me, you're not crazy. If he is keeping something from you, well... the question you have to ask yourself is, what else is he hiding that you haven't found out about yet? I hate to cast suspicion, but... *shrugs* I don't know. *hug* I hope it works out in your favor, big sis. I don't know whether that will be with or without TheBoy, but... I hope you come out of this okay.

Hang in there girl!  Men can be really strange and no your not crazy! (BIG HUGS!)

As a random suggestion, you might want to see a doctor about your anxiety. It sounds like it's starting to interfere with your life, and that's not a good thing. I don't know your stance on medication, but it might be something to consider. Working through issues is good. Dealing with them so that they don't mess up your life, until you can confront them, is also definately helpful.

Angel, I agree with K.  You might want to see your doc.  

As for your situation, I saw it when you first posted it and did not want to say anything because I did not know what to say.  Since then I have thought about it and still will not advise you but will tell you this.

When I met my husband, he and his last wife were getting a divorce.   That meant that some days he had to go see her to discuss issues and sometimes there were phone calls.  J is forgetful, but he ALWAYS remembered to tell me if his ex called and he ALWAYS told me when he was going to see her and came to see me right after (yes, I know, your boy cannot come to see you right after...but you get the point).

When J moved in he was (and still is) friends with an exgirlfriend from before his 17 year marriage with his ex.  While is exwife would always call on the home phone, his exgirlfriend always called on the cell.  Usually I was there so J always asked her why she did that and she said so I would not be upset.  He told her that hiding her calls would upset me, not calling on the landline and asking for him.  But even if she called on the cell and I was not there, J told me she had called.

Now, don't get me wrong, in the beginning, I was jealous of these two women.  I did argue with J about them.  But J always told me the truth, even though he knew I might not like hearing they were calling him  and that I would get upset.  I think J's philosophy was that he planned on staying friends with these women and that I had to learn to trust him and believe in him...and he did that by being honest.

If you want a laugh, J's wife and I ended up working together 2 years after J and I got together.  We are both smokers (sorry folks...see my journal about that) so we often talk outside..but we NEVER talk about J and we get along well.  In fact, J and I were not doing well financially when the divorce payments came in so she paid for them...no repayment.  When she heard we had planned to try to have a child a year ago, she phoned me and asked me if she could meet the child once it was born.  I told her she could be a pseudo aunt.  As it happened, a baby was not meant to be.

The point of this story is this:  if you are suffering so much anxiety about this and the Boy is aware of this, you have to decide if you can ever trust him since he is not doing much to earn trust from you.

I would also like to make the point that if you are so anxious and not sleeping, this is not good for your health.  You need to decide if you can trust this Boy, and only you know that....but if not...cut the ties and deal with the (awful) temporary anxiety and upset that will cause and move on to someone you can trust and who is worthy of you.

I hope I have not overstepped my bounds here.  I wish you the very best, look forward to hearing what is going on and hope that you will find peace.

JD

One hour left here at work. I figured that I had time for a short entry.

First of all, big thank you to everyone who replied. *HUGZZZ* I love you all.

It's good to know that y'all don't think I'm a nutcase.  ;D  As for seeing a doc, well, I don't have one, can't afford one and wouldn't see one even if I were able. That just isn't the way I choose to deal with the slings and arrows of life.

Confrontation is key, and all of you have touched on one very important fact: Trust is critical. And not just trust, but implicit trust. The kind of trust that stands strong against anything life throws at it. Without that kind of trust, you can never really love someone. And if you can't really love them, then that isn't a real relationship. Er, not that the guy and I have a real relationship just yet. Well, we do...we kind of do, but...oy, why must it all be so complicated?  :-/

Anyway, interestingly enough, just as I had hit the Post button on my last entry, "The Distant One" and I finally began talking again. Not arguing, just talking as usual. He said that regardless of how I now feel about him, he loves me and wishes to prove it. How nice, eh? But all of you already know that I can't be won over that easily.  ;)
   After a minor lecture on trust, openness and honesty, and finally getting out some of the questions that had been eating away at my soul, I think I was finally able to make some progress in both easing my nerves and making him understand my POV. Whether this long-distance pseudo-whatever can be saved is pretty much up to him. It all comes down to whether or not I can trust him and I will only be able to decide that with proper time and action.

Someone here once suggested (and I apologize for not remembering whom right this moment) that I write down everything that was bothering me just before I go to sleep. And it seems to have helped some, so when I remember who it was that suggested it, I will thank them properly. A few days ago, I had 2 pages filled with worry. Since the boy and I have been talking again, it's now down to just half a page. Of course, I'm not going to be overly optimistic. As Jdog said, what is meant to be will be.

In hair news, today was a clarifying day. The usual routine + the worst braid ever. Ah well.  ::)

Anyway, 23 minutes to quittin' time. Wish me luck with the rest of this emotional tornado, will ya?

I'm coming in on this late, so you'll have to forgive me for being behind (I'm filling in for the secretary all week and haven't had much free time).  I'm glad you and the boy had a talk.  I agree with the other gals that trust is vital in ANY relationship (not only the romantic ones).  If I can't trust someone I don't want to be around them.  

Now, that being said...I have to point out that we must take past history into account here.  You've mentioned the "boy" being younger than you, and so you're bound to have more life experience than him.  Perhaps in the past, he's been in relationships where he felt he had to lie in order to keep the peace.  Old habits are difficult to break.  That doesn't make it right or excusable for the present set of circumstances, and I am in no way defending him.  I just always try to see another side of the story.  *hugs*

*hugz, Trish* Love ya, sis.
   Yes, trust is vital in any relationship. And yes, I do have more life experience than he does. But that doesn't justify his actions. At his age, he should still know better. I did. And he is aware that what he did was wrong. I can tell that he feels badly about it, and he should. Dishonesty is never ok, period.

On something of a good note, we're still talking. I said everything that I needed to say, voiced every concern that needed to be addressed, and asked every question that I needed to ask. My anxiety is pretty much gone. Now comes the period of "we'll see what happens." The boy and I still love each other, but I have made it abundantly clear to him that if he wishes to have my trust back, he'll have to earn it. In all honesty, I'm not sure if it will ever come back, but if he wants a relationship with me as badly as he has claimed to, then it is in his best interest to try. No guarantees on my part. We'll just wait and see. I'm not going to force myself to make up my mind about everything right here and now.

In hair news, well, there isn't any news. Same ol' CWC today because I had the morning shift. Because of that, I wasn't able to oil last night or treat this morning. But whatever. C'est la vie.
   All of the pokey ends everywhere are still driving me bats-o. Somedays, I feel like going into the bathroom with a pair of scissors and trying to cut them all off one at a time, but not only would that take forever, I'd still have the pokey ends...they'd just be shorter.  :P  It's terribly frustrating. My hair has never looked this ratty before. But what's even more maddening is not really knowing how it all got there. In retrospect, it could have been any number of things: my brushes, severe tangles, flannel bedding, stress, washing daily, unkind hairtoys, etc. etc. etc. What bugs me most is that I'm not sure if I'm just growing out damage from years past or if all of it occurred at the same time semi-recently. My family has often commented on its poor condition.  :'(

Sleep is the same as ever. Some nights I get more than usual, but the "usual" has become very little. I suppose it could be worse.

Money is tight at the moment, but even so, I'm planning another spending spree of sorts. I've been waiting too long for a lot of things and I'm just going to give into the urge. It will help to elevate my mood and remind me that my life is, indeed, all about me. You can't rely on other people to make you happy - it's important to remember that you must make yourself happy as well (a little lesson that I learned during my divorce). And after all of the stress I've endured over the last week, I need a boost.  :P

So I'm off to just be myself and indulge myself a bit. Remember who I am and all that jazz. If "The Distant One" wants all that I've got to offer, he's gonna have to work for it. He owes me that much.  ;)

Thanx again for all of the support, my sisters. Love you!

Quote:

...that if he wishes to have my trust back, he'll have to earn it

Amen to that--and good for you!  ;)

angelspun, i'm a few days behind on your journal.  i say stay strong and don't put up with less than you expect from him. and as for the hair, maybe the ends are just sticking out because of summer humidity? have you done deep conditioning recently? maybe that could be relaxing with a nice long bath.  ;D

wrote on Jun 19^th, 2007 at 7:38pm:

It's good to know that y'all don't think I'm a nutcase.  ;D  As for seeing a doc, well, I don't have one, can't afford one and wouldn't see one even if I were able. That just isn't the way I choose to deal with the slings and arrows of life.

I tried to bite my tongue but I could not.  It is a problem that you do not have a doc and cannot afford one.  I respect that you feel you should deal with your problems alone, but don't let yourself get sick because of it.  If you are having trouble with sleeping and eating,  you could wind up in hospital...which you clearly could not afford either.  Remember, pride cometh before the fall.  Also remember that while God does not throw us more than we can handle, he also gives us tools to get through the these things.  It reminds me of the joke about the man in the flood who refuses help from a person in a boat, a helicopter and something else, stating that God will provide for him.  He drowns and when he asks God why He did not save him, God indicated that he gave him 3 opportunities.

I hope I have not offended you, it is not my intent.  I am just concerned.  Of course, only you can decide what you need.

Just checking in quick today.

This morning was a WTC since I missed it yesterday. I'll likely do the same tomorrow. Washed all of my hair with Pantene Ice Shine Shampoo and left a blended conditioning treatment in for an hour. haha "blended"...not literally made in a blender or anything.  ;D
Anywho, it was 1 tsp. EVOO, 1 tsp. honey, 1 tsp. aloe gel, 4 tsp. Pantene Intensive Moisturizing Mask. Nuked for 11 seconds and stirred with a fork. Anyway, after an hour, I rinsed and followed with Ice Shine conditioner.

Detangled with Pantene Detangling and my broken RS #45...and wouldn't you know it? I oiled the ends today, too.
   Yesterday, I had to run out and buy a new oil spray bottle because my mother trashed my old one for whatever reason.  >:(  Oh well. The new one is clear and it gets the job done. I washed it and mixed up a new oil solution right after. So it's all good there, and I store the new bottle in my room where no one else can touch it.

Today, my father's band has a gig at the local trolley square, so I'm going to head over there right after work. I can't wait to see how many people they draw.  :)  This is the "busy season" for the band, so they'll probably have regular work through the winter.

Anyway, it's almost time for my break...l8rz!

angel, was the show last night or tonight? in any case hope it is/was fun and draws/drew a crowd. your hair sounds like it's getting great treatment. i don't use pantene, but i'll try the rest of that recipe some time.

Thanx, RTG.  :)
Just about any deep conditioner can be used in that treatment. Pantene Pro-V is just the only thing that really works for my hair.

The trolley square show was last night and my father's band ended up drawing the biggest crowd in the history of that stage. I was grinning ear to ear when I arrived because I had never seen so many people gathered there before. Usually, that stage hosts minor acts with a very small turnout. But last night was just nuts. Leave it to my dad.  ;)
   They were also the first band to ever get an encore request, so they literally made trolley square history...twice. The stage staff was pretty amateur and the sound wasn't balanced very well, but the band was able to compensate with their own adjustments. It was a great night.  :)  The staff even begged them to come back next summer.

As I mentioned yesterday, I did another WTC this morning. Same method, same products. Today, I forgot to bring a hairtie to work so I had to leave my hair down. But that's ok because my co-workers like my hair and have complimented it a few times.  :)

On another musical note (bad pun  :P), my long-distance guy is playing his last show with his band tonight. I'm hoping that the other guys won't give him too much crap about quitting, since he's wanted to for a long time.
   As far as the pseudo-relationship, it's still on. I think that my trust may be coming back...verrrrrry slowly. But we'll see. Like I said, I'm not going to rush it. It can't be rushed. It's his fault for breaking it down in the first place, so the least he can do is be patient and give my heart what it needs to heal.

Anyway, with all of that said, the weekend is almost here, so I'm going to start shutting down the office. My eyes are going googly from staring at this computer screen for so long.  :o

Hair: 3rd day CWC hair. The length is beginning to stick together and get kinda gummy. I'm not sure whether it's from not being shapoo-ed or from the Suave conditioner. Perhaps for the first C in the CWC, I will try a light Pantene conditioner...maybe a diluted light Pantene conditioner. Man, this is getting complicated.  :-/
   Oiled the ends over the weekend, but not today. Hair is down but pulled up on the sides with snap barrettes. "Princess hair." I wish the rest of me felt as monarchical.  :P
   Only 5 vitamin E caplets left, and I am looking forward to measuring on the 1st. Can you believe the year is almost half over??  :o  Michaels already has some of their autumn stuff out. hehehehe

Love: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  >:(  That's about all I can say. I can't take this.

Life: I suppose I should mention that the homeless Canadian friend of my father's has taken his RV and moved elsewhere. He's no longer living on the side of our house. I don't know where he is, but I'm glad that he's not with us anymore. Ignorant, goth-bashing, drug-addicted biggot...the heck with him!
   A few nights ago, my sister asked me to do an exercise video with her...now my thighs and hind quarters are killing and it's painful to walk.  :P

Work: Phone is crazy today and there's no shortage of idiots calling up and taking 25 minutes to ask simple questions in broken English and causing me to lose other calls. Ugh.
   My uncle called this morning and asked me to train his oldest daughter on the work that I used to do in my uncle's landscape office. It might mean more $$$ coming my way. It might mean just losing time and gas. We'll see.
   This Friday is payday and it cannot come fast enough. I have a car payment waiting.  :P

Hair: Much needed clarifying day. I'm questioning a lot of things about my routine right now.

Health: That's a joke, right?

Love: Ohhhh its....getting better.  :o  ;)

Life: This space for rent.  :P

Work: Distracted. No training sessions scheduled yet.

Sorry it's so short, but that's really about it.

I'll let you tear it up
If you don't wake me up
But if you tear it,
We can't repair it
So please don't wake me
'Til someone cares
Now no one cares
             -AFI, The Missing Frame

Alrighty. So today, I would have done a treatment as is customary for Wednesdays, but....
   Not only did I wake up half an hour late, but as I went about mixing up a deep conditioning treatment, my stomach became progressively more upset. I ended up popping a few Pepto Bismol tablets and lying down for awhile, hoping for the bubbles in my stomach to dissolve. That didn't happen, and I ended up having to force myself through a shower and a simple CWC when it hurt just to sit down or stand up...or move, or lay down or do anything else, really.  :P
   After my shower, I went straight for my bed and laid there as long as I could before having to throw myself together for work. So no wet detangling today. Just ran Pantene Silkening crème through the length and let it air dry. The last of the bubbles dissolved just as I was clocking in at work.

For the past few months, I've been considering just letting my hair air dry without detangling first. Just to see if there's any less damage over time. I'll still use the Silkening crème after showering and I might still oil the ends, but I want to eliminate the combing part to see if that's what's causing all of the broken ends. Even if that isn't the cause, I'll still be able to lessen the impact to my hair. I think I'm actually going to put this idea to action starting on the 1st and going through the end of the year, just to see what happens.

As for the long-distance thing, it's healing. The boy has assured that the only reason he kept anything from me was because he didn't wish me to become jealous when there was no reason to be in the first place. He has sworn his fidelity from the very beginning and feels quite guilty for not being open (and he should!), and he has said that he would forgive me, were the roles reversed. As I've said, we still love each other...and he understands that it's going to take awhile for my trust to recover. Things are pretty much as normal with that one exception...and that's just how it's going to be until he proves himself trustworthy.

Efforts have been made for a training schedule, but my uncle wants me to come into the office ASAP and do some of the work myself. He'll be paying me under the table, but hey...it's extra cash!  :)

In a few days, I will reach my first goal again. I really need to take some hair pix and post them. It would be really interesting to have visual documentation of my progress. Without a digicam, however, I'm forced to use either a super cheap, disposable camera or shell out heaven knows how much green to have my Rebel cleaned and restored. Either way, I'll have to wait until Friday. But it's definitely time for some hair pix.

2nd day of CWC. The length and ends of my hair feel nice and soft, though I'll probably have some seriously flat, stringy locks by tonight. My hair doesn't like not being washed every day, but it doesn't matter so much if I pull it all back into a braid anyway.
   This morning, I did a wet detangle with Pantene Detangling spray and my broken RS #45 comb. And I oiled the ends.
   It will be interesting to see how my haircare routine will change after I move out of my parents' house and don't have to worry about their schedules and prejudices. Right now, I can only get away with clarifying, treating, etc. when they're not around and it's better that way. They'd freak if they knew what I did while they aren't at home.  ;D  Nothing bad, just things that their narrow little minds can't handle. *ahem*

Anyway, full workday today on about 3½ hours of sleep. Ugh.  :P  Not sure when I'll begin training my cousin on the work at my uncle's office, as I'm supposed to take care of it after my shift ends here. Scheduling a training session for Friday morning wouldn't work because that's the only time that I can fit in a deep conditioning treatment this week. I've already missed the first one.

So it goes. Tired, hungry and pressed for time. My far-away friend is busy with funeral arrangements for his uncle, and I with side work. Thank goodness that the night is on our side, even if the day isn't. And thank goodness that tomorrow is payday!!

Stuff: So I ended up working a full-time day yesterday. Can't remember when I last did that, but ugh.  :P  And I have to do it again today. I have to finish up here, drop my paycheck off at the bank (yes!) and spend a few hours at my uncle's office, trying to get him caught up. I'm trying to stay focused...mostly on the money.  ;)

After the long day yesterday, I went to Target on my way home. My skin has been terribly dry for the past few days, so I wanted to try out one of the new cream oil bodywashes. When I got there, however, a young male employee with dyed jet black hair was restocking the shelves of the aisle that I needed to be in. Though this employee and I have seen each other in passing several times, I could not bring myself to go into the aisle, so close to where he was working, and just grab something and run away quickly. Or worse, stand there for awhile deciding on which bodywash I really wanted. I couldn't hang around reading the bottles, walking between one and the other...dude would have thought I was nuts. So I bypassed the aisle for a bit and wandered about the store, looking at other things and periodically checking back to see if he had left. If this poor fellow had noticed me passing by his aisle, he probably would have thought that I was some crazy stalker with a crush on him or something.  :P lol After awhile, however, I got tired of waiting, put my empty shopping basket down and ran for the door, thinking, "Screw this, I'm going to Wal*Mart!"  :P  So I did.  :P  :P  One victory for social anxiety. lol I'm such a lame arse.  ::)

Cream Oil: Yep, oil.  :P  Betweem the desert sun and winds of summer and cheap bodywash, my skin has dried out severely. Plus, I've been curious about a few of the cream oil bodywashes out on the market now, so I decided to give yet another one a try. True that my skin hates oil and I may well end up kicking myself for the decision later, but you only go around once, right?
   After washing all of my hair once with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, I treated it for an hour with the deep conditioning treatment that I'd whipped up on Wednesday. This morning, I unwrapped it and mixed in another tsp. of EVOO. That gave it a really creamy texture.
   While it was sitting in my hair, I covered my arms with lotion, hoping to alleviate some of the dryness...and yes, there was oil in the lotion too.  :P  
   An hour later, I rinsed my hair and arms and conditioned the former with Ice Shine conditioner. From there on, it was the usual routine. Wet detangled with Pantene Detangling spray and my broken RS #45. Then oiled the ends while my hair was still damp. They're still a bit greasy, but I'll be braiding my hair soon anyway.
   Oh yes, and I have only 1 more vitamin E capsule to take before the bottle is empty. So this morning's theme seems to be oil, oil, oil.  :P  But SoCal summer does not have my permission to dry out my hair and skin.

Other Stuff: The funeral for my best friend's uncle was today. It was a long Catholic ceremony and *he* was a pallbearer. I haven't heard from *him* yet today. He said that he might crash when he got home.
   I also haven't seen anything of the stuff I ordered last week. Not even so much as a shipment confirmation.  :-?  And I don't even remember what all I ordered anymore. Perhaps they're waiting for the backordered items to arrive so they can send everything at the same time. Oy...

Tonight, my father's band plays at one of the local little honkytonks...literally not far from where I live. I'd like to see them, but I have laundry and a car to wash. Besides, if one more of my parents' middle-aged friends harasses me for a dance, I might just lose it.  :P  I wish my guy was here.

Passez un bon week-end, tout le monde.

Welcome to the latter half of the year.

My routine has changed a bit. This morning, I washed all of my hair with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo and conditioned the length with Ice Shine conditioner. I left the conditioner on under a shower cap while finishing everything else...then removed the cap and rinsed. Lastly, I conditioned with Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner.
   Today was the first day in this half of the year where I decided to forego wet detangling altogether. No spraying, no combing, no oiling the ends, nothin'. I ran Pantene Silkening crème through the length, focusing on the ends and the underside strands. And I separated some of the damp strands as they were drying, but that was it. Otherwise, I just let it all dry in the cool air of the house. Going outdoors is freaking suicide. It's hot.

So I'm sick of oil now. The cream oil bodywash left my skin coated and slightly waxy and may be responsible for a few of the breakouts that I'm suffering. So I stopped using it and dragged out my Suave again. Problem is I'll have to send my mesh poofs through the dishwasher or something to get all of the leftover grease off of them.
   My Pantene Detangling spray contains oil, so I've retired it to storage in my bedroom. And I dumped out my oil solution, rinsed out the bottle and will throw it in the dishwasher along with my mesh poofs. Even my vitamins have changed. Yesterday, I finished 6 months of taking vitamin E every day. This morning, I took my first generic multivitamin, which I will also be taking for 6 months to see if there's any difference in my hair.

On the health front, I will be resuming my power walks tonight. Only I'll be doing them nightly for the next 2 weeks. I've also taken on another junk food strike, avoiding anything unhealthy until at least next Sunday. I'm on a mission to lose weight before the 14th, when I start housesitting again. I need to slim down quick just in case my long-distance whatever you'd call him comes out for a visit. And even if he doesn't, I'll still look and feel better from doing more of what I should and less of what I shouldn't.

As a final note, the new tops that I ordered arrived Friday afternoon. I've already tried them on, washed them and added them to my closet. And I now need more hangers.  ;D  I'm already working on collecting the other things that I need to wear with them.
   My makeup box is also seeing something of a revision. Yesterday, I tossed out all of my Sally Hansen nail polishes and gave myself a new, midnight blue manicure using colours by Revlon and Maybelline. Eventually, I'm going to toss out most of my Cover Girl products and replace them with something on the higher end. Maybe even splurge on designer brands now and then.  ;)
   Yes, Angel's undergoing a makeover of sorts, and it's about bloody time! She is growing up, phasing out and moving on.

Angel, are you talking about the Dove Cream oil Body wash?  I got a bottle of it the other day on the discount rack as the lid had a little crack in it.  I got the ultra rich one.  I liked it!  I'am sorry it made you breakout. Maybe you can try Neem soap?  It prevents breakout and doesn't dry out your skin.  I even used it on my face without having to run and put face cream on.  Buddy at target sounds like a hottie! ::)  I go all stupid when I see a good looking man in a store and its usually a cop too!  I get all red faced and have to leave the isle till he's gone. ::)

Lisabelle: Indeed, it is Dove Cream Oil bodywash. I actually had to check. hehe It's the creamy formula in the pink bottle and I probably won't use it again. My skin has a terrible aversion to oil. Haven't heard of Neem...but most any bodywash will work if it doesn't contain oil. Dial and Softsoap are my favourites. As for the cream oil crap, I'll leave it for whomever wants it.

Quote:

Buddy at target sounds like a hottie!  ::)

lol Nah. He reminds me of Billy Joe Armstrong from Green Day, only taller and thinner and much younger. Probably about 10 years younger than myself...strikes me as a mall punk kid. It just kinda creeps me out when I see him because it happens so often. He must think I live there or something. lol  ;D  Besides, I don't look elsewhere when I'm in love.

Hair: CWC today with Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner and Pantene Ice Shine S&C. After that, all I had to do was squeeze out the water with my microfiber towel and run the Silkening crème through the length. Leaves my hair a little bit gummy, but I kinda like this new simplistic approach.
   After air drying today, I combed it out, twisted it up and pinned it with the ends splaying and dangling as they wished. Just to get it up and off of my neck - curse this summer heat!  :P
   Today, I also carried my black umbrella every time I had to walk out in the sun. So now it looks as if my hair and my skin will stay protected.

Health: Back on track.  ;)  Last night, I power walked for the first time in months...and it actually seemed easy! Like my body was already accustomed to it. I even jogged across every street and large driveway in my path. It didn't exhaust me, but I can tell that I'm getting a good workout because my heart rate was up. Those little bursts of jogging really help...like a turbo boost.  ;D
   The eeevil redheaded sister of Nature is on her way and will no doubt try to keep me from walking, but I'm not about to let her succeed. I'll tie her up in the closet if I have to. hehe My apologies to whatever men may be reading this.  ::)

Life: So I went out last night and bought a few new makeup items. Was able to toss out quite a few things that just weren't working out and replace them with higher-end, oil-free counterparts. I'm going out for a few more things this evening.  ;D
   If I have time, I'll probably finish the rest of the work at my uncle's office tonight. I need the money something desperate now.
   Also, as a result of the accident I had a few months ago, my father's insurance company is trying to drop him.  >:(  I'm going to get my own policy...somehow.  :(

Hair: Clarifying day, 2 days behind schedule. But it's alright - at least it got done. The usual routine with a Pantene Purity wash, vinegar rinse, another Purity wash, then condition and air dry. Cool water only, as usual. Right now, hair is dry and waiting to be combed and braided during my break.

Health: Still on the junk food strike, but temptation is everywhere. I might binge on Sunday and go back into "health nut mode" on Monday until I have to housesit on the 14th.
   Still power walking every night. Only 9 more nights of this insanity left. Somehow, I've managed to gain a pound in 3 days. But those little fluctuations are always there. If I keep at it, the numbers will steadily decline. The walks are wiping me out each night and it takes me longer to recover, especially with this heat. But like any other setbacks in life, I just plow through them. Nothing else you can do if you want to win.

Skin: The new foundation I bought is pretty dreadful.  :P  Which sux because I spent good money on it. I had an inkling that long wearing foundation would be more difficult to wash off, but I hadn't counted on lingering residue the morning after.  :P  So onto something else when I can afford it. Sometimes if you don't try, you never know.
   Emptied out my last bottle of Suave bodywash this morning, thank goodness. I really shouldn't buy it to begin with. But I picked up a bottle of Softsoap Pure Cashmere (my favourite) over the weekend, so now my poor skin may finally begin to heal.
   Tomorrow, I plan to do a salt scrub on my left arm. Then perhaps sometime next week, I can do one more sugar scrub on both arms to soften them up before I have to housesit. I would also like to find a really light, oil-free lotion as my beloved Curél is a bit much for my arms.
   Need to do another peel-off masque tonight and over the weekend to remove any traces of the heavy new foundation.  :P

Life: 9 days 'til housesitting. Though my beloved said that he would visit during that time, I cannot help but doubt it. It's like I said in the beginning, I can't get my hopes up for what is indefinitely postponed. The pseudo-relationship is still good, but it can't go anywhere if we never get together.
   Bought a new L'Oreal eyeliner over the weekend that I can't wait to try. But now that will have to wait until I can score another foundation, darnitall.  >:(  Also tossed out my oil-slicked neon green mesh shower poofs over the weekend and bought new black ones. It appears as though the autumn merchandise is beginning to pop up here and there. hehehe  ;)  Black poofs are IT, though. I wish I had a million of them.  ;D
   What else...? Haven't been able to work in my uncle's office lately because every time I go, someone else is always in there and there's only 1 working computer. Argh!
   
ID4: My father had a gig in the mountains yesterday. I wanted to go, but it would have been a long day (with no fireworks!) and I didn't want my mother to be left home by herself to just sit and watch TV. So she & I watched a few old movies, then went to the mall to see if there were any good 4th Of July sales (there weren't, but I got a free smoothie out of the deal).
   After stopping home for a bit, we went to the trolley square (over by where my father's band played a few weeks ago) to watch fireworks set off from one of the local schools. Ahhh, do I love fireworks! And people just keep getting more and more creative with them.

Anyway, that's about it for now. Peace.

Hair: Clarifying day, 2 days behind schedule. But it's alright - at least it got done. The usual routine with a Pantene Purity wash, vinegar rinse, another Purity wash, then condition and air dry. Cool water only, as usual. Right now, hair is dry and waiting to be combed and braided during my break.

Health: Still on the junk food strike, but temptation is everywhere. I might binge on Sunday and go back into "health nut mode" on Monday until I have to housesit on the 14th.
   Still power walking every night. Only 9 more nights of this insanity left. Somehow, I've managed to gain a pound in 3 days. But those little fluctuations are always there. If I keep at it, the numbers will steadily decline. The walks are wiping me out each night and it takes me longer to recover, especially with this heat. But like any other setbacks in life, I just plow through them. Nothing else you can do if you want to win.

Skin: The new foundation I bought is pretty dreadful.  :P  Which sux because I spent good money on it. I had an inkling that long wearing foundation would be more difficult to wash off, but I hadn't counted on lingering residue the morning after.  :P  So onto something else when I can afford it. Sometimes if you don't try, you never know.
   Emptied out my last bottle of Suave bodywash this morning, thank goodness. I really shouldn't buy it to begin with. But I picked up a bottle of Softsoap Pure Cashmere (my favourite) over the weekend, so now my poor skin may finally begin to heal.
   Tomorrow, I plan to do a salt scrub on my left arm. Then perhaps sometime next week, I can do one more sugar scrub on both arms to soften them up before I have to housesit. I would also like to find a really light, oil-free lotion as my beloved Curél is a bit much for my arms.
   Need to do another peel-off masque tonight and over the weekend to remove any traces of the heavy new foundation.  :P

Life: 9 days 'til housesitting. Though my beloved said that he would visit during that time, I cannot help but doubt it. As I said a few months ago, his trip has been indefinitely postponed, and getting my hopes up is pretty useless. The pseudo-relationship is still good, but it can't go anywhere if we never get together.
   Bought a new L'Oreal eyeliner over the weekend that I can't wait to try. But now that will have to wait until I can score another foundation, darnitall.  >:(  Also tossed out my oil-slicked neon green mesh shower poofs over the weekend and bought new black ones. It appears as though the autumn merchandise is beginning to pop up here and there. hehehe  ;)  Black poofs are IT, though. I wish I had a million of them.  ;D
   What else...? Haven't been able to work in my uncle's office lately because every time I go, someone else is always in there and there's only 1 working computer. Argh!
   
ID4: My father had a gig in the mountains yesterday. I wanted to go, but it would have been a long day (with no fireworks!) and I didn't want my mother to be left home by herself to just sit and watch TV. So she & I watched a few old movies, then went to the mall to see if there were any good 4th Of July sales (there weren't, but I got a free smoothie out of the deal).
   After stopping home for a bit, we went to the trolley square (over by where my father's band played a few weeks ago) to watch fireworks set off from one of the local schools. Ahhh, do I love fireworks! And people just keep getting more and more creative with them.

Anyway, that's about it for now. Peace.

hey angel, i don't know if this would work for you, but when i do wear foundation i wear burt's bees tinted moisturizer. it gives a little color and is all natural. it helped my skin calm down, but then again, a friend had trouble with it. you can buy it online or at health food stores. lately i haven't been wearing foundation, but if i do, that's what i like. it's not totally oil free, but all natural and the natural oils doesn't seem to bother my skin as much. i have tried most drug store foundations and eventually felt like i was wearing a mask and either getting red skin or breaking out-but not with this. although, with makeup, to each her own  :D  good luck

btw, when you do a second "purity rinse" on your hair, what is that?  

RTG: Thank you for the suggestion. Unfortunately, tinted moisturizers don't work for my skin, especially if they contain oil.  :o  I have been a bit curious about Burt's Bees lipglosses, though. Have you tried any of them?
   The Purity wash is just an all-over wash with Pantene Purity clarifying shampoo. On a clarifying day, I'll wash once with the Purity shampoo, rinse with cool water, then do a distilled white vinegar (DWV) rinse, then rinse again with cool water, then wash again with Pantene Purity (it makes my hair feel smoother and gets rid of the vinegar smell), rinse again and condition.

Hair: Oh man, I could make a career of finding and isolating the pokey, broken ends and trimming them off...I believe that still counts as seek and destroy, yes? With the mass amounts of damage that my hair has sustained in recent years, it would take no less than a week to trim it all out. Oy! I wish that I had a team of skilled hair servants to do it all for me. The likes of whom would know exactly what to look for and how much to cut off.  ::)
   After looking over so many of the ends, I'm now certain that they were caused by damage and are not new growth. Still not exactly sure what type of damage, but it may be a combination of things that I'd been doing in the past.

Also, after much debate, I've pretty much decided on sticking with my current scissor lady. True, she may like to hack on me, but that might not be such a bad thing if I intend to grow this damage out. Last year, I gained 3" of new growth, and if I can continue that pattern, it won't take me very long to reach waist length again. And I certainly want my hair to be healthy when it does.
   So I guess what I'm trying to say is that it doesn't much matter to me if I have a slow gain over the years. I'm ok with reaching waist length in the next year or 2. It doesn't need to happen tomorrow and you can't rush art.

It's rather funny. I used to have visions of having long, flowing hair to complement my long, flowing wedding dress and long, flowing veil (if I wore one). I really have no idea why I thought that. Not that I don't want it someday, but it's not like I'm getting married tomorrow, for pity's sake!  ;D  It might never even happen. That's just the reality of it.
   In any case, I think I've realized that I don't have to rush. I don't have anything planned, so it's alright if I don't reach my ultimate goal length for a few years. I wasn't planning to anyway.
   Oh, I'll save the long, flowing wedding fantasy and think about it from time to time. But for now, there's just my hair...and my journey. No, I'm not on any drugs.  :P  lol

Today, I did another WTC, as is customary for Fridays. Finished off my old jar of Pantene Intensive Moisturizing Mask and even used about 1 tsp. of the old Deep Fortifying Treatment that I still have hanging around.
   After that, it was business as usual. Silkening crème, air dry, done. Didn't even braid today.

Other Stuff: Yesterday, I got an e-mail from my immediate supervisor, asking if he could see me for about 5 minutes before my shift started the next day (today). Naturally, I was curious and nervous as heck, worrying that it might not be very good news.
   Today, I arrived late (gotta keep up appearances!  :P) and rushed into his office, fully expecting him to say something along the lines of, "You've been doing a terrible job - you're fired!" But instead, it was quite the opposite. Not only will my position at work now have more involvement with his department and a better understanding of the other departments, but I'm also getting a tiny little raise.  ;D  
   He also said that every comment that he'd received about my mother or I was positive. Apparently our customers think very highly of us, even if we don't think so highly of them. lol In any case, I'm grateful for whatever bit of good comes my way. I'm certainly no stranger to the bad.

Everything else is pretty much same as usual. Have a good weekend, folks.  :)

Quote:

It appears as though the autumn merchandise is beginning to pop up here and there. hehehe

woo HOOOOO, yeah!!   8-)

yeah for tiny raises!  ;D

angel, i have tried their lip glosses and like them. (not their lip sticks, but glosses) i have one in rhubarb for evenings if i feel like wearing color. generally though, i just use their basic burts bees chapstick in the clear color.

wrote on Jul 6^th, 2007 at 7:56pm:

I have been a bit curious about Burt's Bees lipglosses, though. Have you tried any of them?

I love, love, LOVE (did I mention I really love?) Burt's Bees lip balms and lip shimmers (which are the balm with color added).  They are great things - I carry 3 or 4 of the things in my purse all the time.  They're all natural, with Vitamin E and a touch of peppermint oil.

Today was the usual CWC. 3rd day in a row. Still using Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner and Pantene Ice Shine S&C. Following with Pantene Silkening crème and just letting it be. That's the general routine now, as it will be for the next 6 months.
   Still clarifying once a week and doing deep conditioning treatments as often as possible (at least once a week). Haven't done a heavy EVOO treatment overnight in awhile. Mostly because I forget which days I'll be washing all of my hair, and I would have to do an EVOO treatment the night before. My hair doesn't seem to have suffered for it, though.
   Tomorrow, I have the morning shift at work, so that will be my 4th day in a row CWC-ing. I guess clarifying will have to wait until Wednesday this week. I don't know what's worse, the monotony of a weekly hair schedule or said schedule being messed up by the unpredictability of life. Ah well.

In other hair news, I've been taking half hour periods out of most days to isolate a small section of hair (one different section per day) and trim out the pokey, broken ends. Right now the left side of my head is looking less fuzzy than the right...but only by a marginal degree. *sigh* Perhaps if I keep at it, my hair will soon look better all over. Or perhaps it's just a wasted effort. We'll see.
   Right now, I am washing all of my combs (lol for some reason, I almost typed "bombs"). All 4 of them...and I only use 2 now.  ::)

So I went to Target after work this evening and stopped by their Burt's Bees display, which I found had not only been moved but now only carries a fraction of what it used to. The lipglosses that I'd been wondering about were nowhere in sight.  :(

Each day, I've been trying to figure out one little thing to do to help prepare for housesitting this weekend. I want myself and my car to look our best just in case my long-distance amigo does decide to come out for a visit after all. I'm not saying whether he will or won't, but I'm making all of the necessary arrangements "just in case."

Also, I was able to get a new L'Oreal foundation a few days ago to replace the long wearing Infallible stuff I bought earlier. In the process, I've discovered that I like compact foundations better than bottled liquids, and the new stuff actually washes off and doesn't turn 20 shades darker on my skin within 5 minutes of wear.  ;D  So my new goth face is ready.

Anyway, I need to get ready for my nightly power walk now. Only 5 more to do before I leave. I've also stuck to my junk food strike. This is the longest that I have ever gone without eating crap, and you know something? Between all of this exercising and healthy eating, I feel much better than I used to. My skin is clearer than it's been in a long time because I'm actually taking care of it regularly. I tell ya...if "The Distant One" can't make it out, it will be his loss.  8-) lol No, I'm not actually that self-assured, but I can pretend to be.

hehe, Angel Spun.. I've always believed that if you pretend to be confident long enough, one day you'll wake up and find out you're not pretending anymore.    ;):D

Confidence? I take mine in a shot glass.  :P  Just kidding.  ;D

Oy, I haaaate mornings!!  :P  Well, the early mornings are ok if I'm on my way to bed and not to work. Again, I'm running on 3 hours' sleep, basically a walking zombie.

4th day CWC hair. Not too bad. Length is a bit gummy from the Silkening crème, but I'm leaving it down until after I've had a chance to work on a strand.

Today, I've cut all my nails off and will shape them in a few hours. I'll finish them when I work on trimming up my brow line.
   Skin is doing much better. The Pure Cashmere bodywash has worked wonders. And between all of the sweating and washing, my face is still quite clear.

Good news from the scale this morning. I'm down to 117!  :D  That's 3 lbs. gone in 5 days. My legs are beginning to recover their strength and I think my thighs may be getting thinner. Maybe my little rock & roll figure is still hiding under there after all.
   Naturally, I expect to gain back a few lbs. while housesitting, as I won't be power walking and my junk food strike will be over. My goal right now is to get down to a number that I'm comfortable with for now, and deal with the aftermath when I return home. With any luck, it won't take long to get back to wherever I was at before I left. But I haven't been this light or healthy in a long time.

As for my far-away friend, I suppose I must accept (again) that he won't be visiting anytime soon. 10 months now we've been romantically involved and not once has he made any physical effort. I'm losing both faith and patience, and he knows that I won't wait forever.

Of course, the other little out-of-state "friend" of his is planning to visit him again in August. She seriously needs help. I keep praying that she finds another guy to obsess over because my guy isn't the right one.  >:(
   We'll see what happens then, I suppose. If he's honest and behaves in a committed and trustworthy manner, then I'll try to hang in there. If not, I'll probably just cut bait and move on. No guy is worth this much stress. And there again, it will be his loss.
   But for right now, we're ok. Well...ok as we can be under the circumstances.

That's pretty much it. I'm tired. I've said that already. I'm also waiting for Blaqk Audio's album to drop, as it reminds me a great deal of the music that I grew up with.  ;)

Peace and harmony, all.

In the world of hair: Ahhhhh....much needed clarifying day.  :)

In the world of romance: *a few giddy giggles and a huuuuuuge involuntary grin that I can't make go away* Oh, Lordy! That's about all I can say.

In the world in general: Brows are shaped up, nails are about to be. Missed my walk last night.  >:(  But lost 0.4 lbs anyway.  :)  It's a good day today.

angel, sounds like you are doing great with discipline in getting enough excercise in! how soon do you house sit?

It sounds like you did indeed have a good day! Don't you wish all days could end lighter, fitter, and with a gigglegrin?

RTG: I wish I was disciplined!  ;D  When I want to accomplish something, I'm pretty determined, but I do fall off of the wagon sometimes. In the last 2 weeks, I've missed 2 walks and only made up for one of them.  :-[  But I'm also going to try and wash my car tonight in addition to walking, so that might make up for the calories that I didn't burn.
   Also, in the midst of my junk food strike, I've had at least 4 tacos, a deluxe burrito, an enormous plate of nachos (which I only finished about half of) and lots of Triscuits.  ;D  While none of that may fall into the "junk" category, I wouldn't exactly call it strictly "healthy" either. But, ya know...I'm still almost 4 lbs. lighter than when I started this routine.  ;)

Oh yes, and I start housesitting late Saturday afternoon, which means that I must have everything in order by then. There is a chance, no matter how slim, that my long-distance lover may indeed make it out for a visit next week, so all of my ducks must be in a row, as they say.


Quote:

It sounds like you did indeed have a good day! Don't you wish all days could end lighter, fitter, and with a gigglegrin?

Kiraela: That would be nice...although mine usually end with me nodding off in front of my laptop after a busy, strenuous night and forgetting to brush my teeth.  :P

So this morning, I was able to do a deep conditioning treatment on my hair and a sugar scrub on my arms. As I waited the usual hour before rinsing the treatment out, I covered my arms in a rich lotion and just let it soak in. It was pretty gross at the time, but I tried to ignore it while I made breakfast/lunch and did dishes and laundry. Then I just rinsed the lotion and the conditioning treatment away at the same time.
   Today, the latter was made with 1 tsp. EVOO, 1 tsp. aloe vera gel, 1 tsp. honey, 4 tsp. Pantene Deep Fortifying Treatment.

After that, my hair had the usual care...or negligence, however you look at it. I just ran Pantene Silkening crème through the length and let it air dry.

Yesterday, I spent over an hour on one strand, isolating one pokey, broken end at a time and trimming it off. The left side of my hair looks a bit less fuzzy than the left, so I'll probably continue with this insanity until all of my hair has been treated this way. Curse my ex-boyfriend and his stupid flannel bedding!  >:(

In other news, it's payday today!  :D  So I'll be in a mad rush to hit the bank, Target and the grocery store to gather whatever I'll need for housesitting. Should be an interesting week...

Day 2 of housesitting.

Already I miss my showerhead at home.  :(  I knew I was going to when I took my last shower in my own bathroom on Saturday. The ones in the house that I'm staying at used to be really cool. But they've been replaced with strange new ones that I'm not such a fan of.

The cool thing about housesitting (in addition to getting paid) is being able to live on my own terms for awhile. Be on my own schedule, rather than having to work around everyone else's. Do what I want, when I want, how I want without someone else giving me crap for it. Get to live as I would on my own.

So today was a clarifying day. Were it up to me, I would clarify every Sunday rather than every Tuesday. There's just something about starting the week off fresh.
   Today, I hit a milestone...2½ hours in the shower.  :o  All spent scrubbing, clarifying, shaving and exfoliating...basically getting rid of everything that I didn't need. Like a snake shedding its skin. And I had to stop and blow my nose a lot. Something about staying in the shower that long builds up histamines like crazy. I don't konw if it's the water vapours or what, but my sinuses just can't take it.  :P

Anyway, I feel better...though my nose is still going crazy.

Yesterday, before I left, I realized that I was in need of another light conditioner. So rather than buying another bottle of Suave, I diluted the remains of my Pantene Ice Shine conditioner and added the last little bit of my Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner to it. It's an interesting combination, but it does the job, I guess.
   Now, for a "heavy" conditioner, I'm using Daily Moisture Renewal. I bought a new bottle of it at Target on Friday when I picked up a 2 pack of my favourite bodywash.  :)

So anyway, the routine today was Pantene Purity wash, vinegar rinse, another Purity wash, then conditioned with Patnene Daily Moisture Renewal. Then just air dried as usual.

Also, I ordered 2 new seamless combs from Creative Products, NY today, hoping that one of them could replace my broken Rachael Stephens comb. If I like them enough, I may get rid of my other seamless rake combs. Now that I know cellulose doesn't like being put through the dishwasher, I don't imagine I'll have any problems with cracking and losing teeth.

Anyway, that's about all I can think to write for now. It's been a rather boring day.  :-/

2.5 hours in the shower!!!  OMG they must have a good water heater!!  I don't think I could do that.  I love doing all the things you said, but still!!  Were you water logged?  ;D

Good for you though.  Too bad you don't like the shower head.

JD

Housesitting day 3.

Now I'm sick.  :(  This happens often when I housesit and it doesn't clear up until after I've been back home awhile. It starts with an all-out assault on my sinuses, which leads to tonsilitis which usually leads to the flu. *sigh*
   After work, I'm going to stop by my parents' house and pick up my cleaning gloves so I can get a little housework done at my aunt & uncle's place. It could use a good dusting at the least...assuming I find the energy.

Last night was perfectly dreadful. Between not being able to breathe and the obnoxious basset hound barking at all hours (literally), I got almost zero sleep.  :(

Anyway, as far as hair goes, I did a CWC this morning with my diluted Ice Shine conditioner and a drop of Ice Shine shampoo, then Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. The latter I left in under a shower cap as usual while finishing the rest of my "shower duties." Did I mention that I don't care for the showerheads in my aunt & uncle's house? They're quite strange and I have to use 2 at the same time, which is awkward.
   Anyway, ran the Silkening crème through the length before rushing outside to put the constantly barking basset hound in the guest room. Some roof workers had come to the property next door, so the stupid dog was going nuts barking and howling. She's not the kind who wears herself out with it either. She'll just bark and bark and bark for hours. I don't advocate the use of a shock collar under normal circumstances, but this dog is clearly an exception.  >:(

Anyway, so hair is dry now and waiting to be braided. And I don't have to listen to the obnoxious basset at least while I'm away at work. Oy.

Here's a pic of the Creative combs that I ordered: http://www.creativetool.com/enlarged_views/C8.jpg

One more little observation...after viewing my hair with above lighting, I've noticed that there are significantly less curly, damaged ends poking out everywhere on the left side of my hair, where I've been doing S&D missions on certain strands. I will have to keep this up because it seems to be working well.  :)

That's all for now.

Angel, could it be you're allergic to pet hair/dander??  :P
Just a thought...

Trisha: Nope. I grew up in a house full of pets. Cats, dogs, horses, you name it...all without a problem. With sinuses as sensitive as mine, you just never know. It could be the most random little thing or a combination of different things.
   This particular reaction might have something to do with the way that my aunt, uncle and their kids take care of their pets...or it could be something in the house. It only happens when I housesit there, though. No other time. Perhaps the house itself is posessed.  :o

Hair: 2nd day CWC. I was hoping to be able to deep condition today, but was informed at the last minute that I had the morning shift today and therefore would not have time.
   So, the usual routine today. Diluted Ice Shine conditioner, Ice Shine shampoo, DMR conditioner, Silkening crème, air dry, braid. I can't wait to get back home and resume the seek and destroy missions, one strand at a time. I will beat this most unfortunate fuzzy, damaged, broken, poky stuff yet.
   Also, already looking forward to measuring on the 1st. I'm not afraid of you, August. Bring on your torrid wrath!

Health: Slightly better today, for whatever reason. However, after sleeping a grand total of 5 hours in the last 3 days and spending almost every conscious hour staring into computer screens, my eyes are exhausted. It was interesting driving to work this morning with blurred vision.  :P

Housesitting: Day 4. Ugh...is it over yet?
Dogs were better behaved this morning, but that might just be because they were tired. I had to get up before them and get the house going before heading off to work. I am a little bit concerned for the basset, though. She doesn't seem the least bit happy and behaves as though she might be sick or hurt. She's also extremely dirty - her dander is heavy and greasy as is typical of bassets, and I might try to give her a bath if the weather warms up.
   I might also give the house a good dusting and see if that doesn't help with the histamines. Thank God for cleaning gloves.  :P  Let's also hope that somewhere in this house is a working vacuum. It seriously needs it.

Anyway, that's all for today. Everything else is going pretty well.

angel-sounds like not the best housesitting time. maybe it will make your house feel restful when you get back..no basset houds or histamenes?  :-/

RTG: Indeed, it hasn't been the best housesitting experience. Fortunately, it hasn't been the worst either. I've gotten way sicker there before and had to knock myself out with Benadryl.  :P  Oh yes, and then there was the time before this when I decided to Nair my arms.  :o  :P
   But as for my parents' house feeling restful? heh No.

Hair: Finally had a WTC day. Washed all of my hair with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, then left the Deep Fortifying Treatment in for an hour, then conditioned with DMR conditioner. Ran the Silkening crème through the length as usual and air dried. I forgot to bring a hairtie today, so I'm not braiding. Just letting it hang there stress-free. I'll get to comb it out when I get a break, though.

Health? I was able to run the vacuum around in my aunt & uncle's place and even do a little dusting. The windows stay open whenever possible.
   Last night, I took an antihistamine tablet and it didn't knock me out! I was surprised. Although, it doesn't seem to have done much of anything from what I can tell. If it contributed in any way to me getting a decent amount of sleep last night, I am grateful.
   A little stress has returned. Within the next few months, there could be another threat to the long-distance pseudo-relationship (ie. little miss what's-her-face is coming back to visit him again). But I'm going to just sit back and see what he does. If he's open and honest and behaves in a trustworthy manner, fine. If not, I'll sever all ties and be done with it. But I'm not going to let it totally stress me out. The boy's actions and decisions are his own, and I'm leaving it in his hands and in God's.

Housesitting: Day 5. 2 more days left. I've already spent almost all of the $$$ that they gave me for doing this.
   Yesterday, I went to the Godiva boutique and got a dark chocolate raspberry Chocolixir. OMG! Best thing I've had in a long time! I also got a dark chocolate raspberry bar. Dark, sweet indulgence...  ;)  We can't be health nuts all the time.
   Still miss my showerhead at home.  :(  And my satin sheets. And my parents' histamine-free house. I'll be grateful to go back to all of that. Oh yeah and a vacuum that doesn't short out every time it's moved.  ;D

Angel,

You mentioned you grew up in a house full of animals.  Have you had any at home recently?  I ask because, contrary to what people think, allergies develope.  You are not born with them.  They can develope.  In fact it is one of the biggest reasons vets have to give up their jobs.


You are wise to watch what happens.  Frankly, if I may say so, knowing how much her visiting upset you, I am surprised that he has her visiting again.  But hey, maybe that is why I find myself single.  Ya...I am the expert on relationships (written with great sarcasm).

JD

perhaps it's not that he is having her visit, but that she is visiting and has nowhere else to stay? just a thought. I still don't neccessarily approve, but it's not my call to approve or not.  that's angel's job.
Anyway, that sounds like one craptacular vacuum cleaner :(

K, I maybe a witch about this, but as far as I am concerned, if she cannot afford a hotel to be in the area, she should not be staying there.  I am not saying it is necessarily her fault.  HE knows how Angel feels.  It is up to him to decide whether or not to stress Angel.

I admit, I am a bit bitter about men, so maybe I am wrong.

JD

No, you definately have a point. She should be staying at a hotel. I just hope he's upfront and honest with this... girl... and tells her that he has the bestest woman in the world waiting for him to go see her, and that she(his visitor) can cool her hormones or leave the city.

K & JD: You guys bring up some very good points. I agree on all counts.
   K is more or less right that he's not necessarily having her visit. I think that it was already either planned or just something that she spontaneously decided to do. She's a family friend whom he has known for a long time, so she stays with my guy and his family when she's in the area. I can understand that - I stayed with my surrogate parents in KS when I drove out for a visit.
   However, like I said, I do agree with everything else you guys mentioned. I, too, am pretty appalled that he would have her out again, given how much stress it put on our relationship last time. I understand that it might not be his choice, but he certainly isn't doing anything to discourage these visits.
   And you're right, I don't approve of her deciding to visit him every 2 months, of her plastering cutesy little pix and messages all over his MySpace page, of the constant, obsessive contact that she maintains with him, of her staying at his house rather than a hotel (but whatever). But most of all, what I don't approve of is the way that he is handling all of it. Or better said, the way he isn't handling it.  >:(

And K's also right about the vacuum. It is indeed "craptacular,"  ;D  although I'm glad that I used it, considering that yesterday, the carpets were professionally cleaned while I was at work. No one told me that they would be coming.  :-?

Adventures In Housesitting: Last night, a suspicion that I'd had was confirmed: one of the dogs is dominating the other and not allowing her to eat or drink. So last night I had to tie him (the domineering one) to a tree and make sure that the basset had sufficient nourishment. No animal starves to death on my watch!  >:(  I then gave the basset a lecture in female empowerment, and told her that she was a giver of life and not to let that overgrown pup push her around. As for the domineering one, I let him loose only after the basset was finished with her dinner.
   Later that night, or rather, at about 2:30 the next morning, I was awakened by the basset barking and howling like crazy...which is typical behaviour for her in the wee hours.  >:(  Having only a few hours left to sleep before work, I decided that I wasn't going to let her take them from me, so I got up and threw her in the guest room. Argh!

Had a slow start this morning, but still managed to get ready, check on the animals, hit Starbucks and get to work early. After only a few hours of sleep to mention. Blugh...I hate mornings.  :P

Hair: Today was the typical CWC. Though it almost ended up being something else, as I incoherently grabbed my Purity clarifying shampoo instead of my diluted Ice Shine conditioner and took it into the shower with me. After I'd been in there awhile, I looked up at my products lined up on the window sill and thought, "Wait...that doesn't look right."  :P  So I had to step out into the early morning freeze, dripping wet, and exchange bottles. Oy...good morning, Angel.  ::)
   Still using the Silkening crème and have decided that I'm not thrilled with it. Especially if I have to wear my hair down, like today and yesterday. It gives my hair a sort of gummy texture and makes it stick to itself. I'll probably keep using the Silkening crème until it's gone, though, and just switch back to the Detangling spray afterwards.

Other: So the sleepless anxiety has returned, pointless and damaging as it may be. I kept telling myself that I wasn't going to let this crap get to me this time around, but it has. *sigh* I'll deal. If something is beyond your control, let it go. That's tough to do when your heart's on the line. It would be a tragic thing to see a 2 year friendship dissolve over irresponsible and thoughtless choices, but worse things have happened. If the boy's passive attitude causes irreparable damage to our relationship, then the consequences will be on his head. I've suffered too much for this already.

angel, have you tried meditating before bed...or lying on the floor doing stretches and deep breathing? i've had a lot of anxiety this year during my never ending job search, but since i've started taking a few min. each night to stretch and breathe deeply-it's improved my sleep-which has made me feel much better. just a thought

also...not to minimize the tough choices you may be facing with this guy...but if he isn't able to be sensitive to your feelings (how excited you were to possibly see him, and how this girl visiting upset you before etc.) then he may not be the right guy. and if he's not the right guy, then no  amount of deep breathing excercises will  suppress your anxiety if its there to protect your heart....you know him though, so of course it comes down to what you think you need to do. *wishing it goes well for you*

Quote:

I've suffered too much for this already.

Keep reminding yourself of this  *hugs*

RTG: You know, I tried a little meditative deep breathing yesterday when I laid down for a nap. But my mind started racing and I found myself breathing faster and faster as if I was climbing stairs or something and not being able to sleep for the sudden rush of anxiety.  :P  Maybe you're right - maybe it is there to protect my heart. Like an obvious reminder that something is wrong.
   Or I might not be that good at meditating.  :-/  How do you do it?

Trisha: *hugs* Oh, I'm painfully aware. Painfully.

Hair: Today's WTC killed my bottle of Pantene Deep Fortifying treatment. I now have nothing left from Pantene's old line, but have 3 new treatments waiting for me in my armoire at home.
   The routine was typical this morning. Washed all of my hair with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, treated for an hour with the Deep Fortifying Treatment, then used Daily Moisture Renewal as a final conditioner. Ran the Silkening crème through the length (I will be glad when that stuff is gone) and let it all air dry. Now, it's waiting to be braided.

Health: Slept decently last night after ending a conversation with Mr. Long Distance somewhat abruptly. I find myself growing more and more intolerant of his passive attitude and have decided that if he can't bother to tell little miss out-of-state to stop acting as she is, I will probably just cut bait and move on. I don't need anymore unnecessary drama, and if he's not fixing it, then he's condoning and perpetuating it. And that's bull$#&%.  :-X
   As for the sinus nightmare, things have been clearing up. I'm still sneezing and constantly blowing my nose, but I'm not "sick" anymore. So the fog is slowly lifting in all areas of life, it seems.

Housesitting: Last day...thank goodness! All my stuff is packed up into my car, and I might stop at my parents' house after work and unload it all before going back to my aunt & uncle's place. Just so everything is already in its place when I go back home and I don't have to stay up into the ungodly hours unpacking.
   Upon returning to my aunt & uncle's house, I still have to redress their bed, put away the dishes that I washed this morning and wash a few towels. Then I'll pretty much hang out until late tonight when they get back, then help unload their RV and possibly catch a late dinner with them if they go. Then, I'll get to go home.
   Speaking of home, there may well be a few things waiting for me on my bed.  ;)  So I'm anxious to get there and see.

Last night, I finally got to sleep in my own bed again. And this morning, I got to use my own showerhead again. Ahhhh...
   My father is really glad to have me back in the house again. It's funny how much he misses me when I'm away. While I'm here, I get looks and comments of confusion and disgust for who I am and what I do (or don't do). But if I go away even for a week, my dad gets a mad case of empty nest syndrome...and I'd be willing to bet that he even misses the things that he claims he can't stand about me. Because it's all me.  ;)  Men are so silly.

Speaking of my dad, he asked me as I was going out this afternoon to pick up a Diamond Rio CD for him with a certain song on it that he wants to learn. So I agreed and was on my way. Even though he gave me $20, I ended up finding it for $8.
   While I was out, I found a guy's necklace in an accessory shop that I totally wanted to buy for my far-away friend. It was a guitar pick-shaped, dark silver pendant with a black rose engraved into it, hanging from a black leather cord. I seriously considered getting it for him...and if we were on better terms right now, I would have. But I've been getting more annoyed with him lately. The more I think about it, the worse it gets...and the good memories that I have of him only make it that much more painful.  :'(

My hair routine today was a CWC. Silkening crème, all that jazz. Was working fine until I decided to cover myself in sunblock.  :P  It ended up passing from the back of my neck to my hair and making it greasy and stringy, so there was nothing I could do but braid it. Ugh! I hate sunblock! WTF was I thinking?!
   To make matters worse, I noticed a few black streaks on my arm from where my purse had been hanging most of this afternoon. The sunblock on my arm was literally eating through the finish on my purse and staining my skin.  :o  I'd rather deal with the inconvenience of an umbrella or parasol than let sunblock eat through all of my stuff and irritate my skin. Quel horreur...

As predicted, there was indeed a host of "presents" waiting for me on my bed when I got home yesterday.  ;D  Among them were the 2 new Creative combs that I ordered. They're a little smaller and lighter than my RS #45, and the teeth are much finer. The ends come to sharper points, but still smooth. I rather like them - haven't used them all that much yet. But last night, I actually had the stupidest dream that teeth were falling out of them already. lol Oh Angel, get a grip!  ::)
   I'm going to treat these ones better than any of their predecessors, since I now know how to clean them properly. I've replaced the Conair seamless acrylic comb in my purse with a new Creative cellulose one. The Conair seamless combs and my broken RS #45 have been cast to the "retired/unused" side of my hairtoy drawer.

God. The 2nd to last song on my dad's new Diamond Rio CD would be absolutely perfect to play at my wedding, if I were to marry Mr. Long Distance. *SIGH*  :'(
   My friends, if any of you are able to save a thought or a prayer for this ailing relationship, please do. I've been trying and I've been praying, but I can't do it alone. I really don't want to let this go.

Quote:

Slept decently last night after ending a conversation with Mr. Long Distance somewhat abruptly.

Angel, honey, that's NOT a good sign for this relationship. I don't mean to be butting my nose in, but... You might need to do a bit of thinking on this one, as to whether or not your health is worth dealing with his crap. *hug* *support*

yes, starting to agree with k on this one, angel. i realize none of us really know this guy like you do, but he sounds like he may not be exactly right for you and you want the guy that's just right. in the case of a friend i have here in town, she held on to a hard relationship for a few years, and then when she finally let it go for her own sake, she found out that a wonderful guy had been waiting in the wings for her all the time in the "just friends category." he'd been confused by her staying in the other relationship so long, but still was there being her friend.
as for the deep breathing, i lay on the floor on my back, knees bent and arms out facing up. Then i breathe in through nose and out through mouth. i do this until i feel my anxiety lessening, or at least until i feel my breath is even. you might want to try getting a short yoga dvd to do at night, and help you relax. now of course, this won't help directly with the guy situation as you need to make a decision there, but it can help with the physical side effects of anxiety. :) let me know how it goes.

Thanx, all. And thanx, RTG for the deep breathing tip. I'll have to try that soon.

Hair: Same ol' routine. CWC, Silkening crème, air dry, braid. Tomorrow, I will clarify if I don't have the morning shift at work. Haven't been able to do any seek & destroy missions. Tonight, I may fix that if the kinks from my braid ever come out.

Long-Distance Whatever: The boy & I have been talking with decent results. As it turns out, he never intended to violate my trust even though it ended up happening that way. He also didn't realize that his actions were encouraging this out-of-state "friend" of his (he admits to being pretty dang clueless about things like that) and has assured many times that he has absolutely no feelings for anyone besides myself.
   On one hand, I sometimes think that I may be being too hard on him. I myself wasn't so keen on this sort of thing at his age, and had found myself in a similar situation...so I can't judge him any harsher than I would judge myself at that age, right?
   Wrong. On the other hand, if he's serious about pursuing an older woman, he's going to need a lot of extra maturity and insight to make up for the years of life experience that he lacks. Such a thing is neither impossible nor likely.
   As for me, I'm taking it one day at a time. If he is really a trustworthy person, then I should be able to trust him under any circumstances. But as I've said, that's something that he can only prove with time. We still love each other and are still best friends, BUT I am at the end of my rope. It's all on him now.

Other: Yesterday, I helped my parents build a deck in the backyard. I spent hours sitting in the dirt, carrying heavy boards, pushing said boards into place and getting splattered with salt and arsenic.  :P  My father and I finished the main part of it just as night fell. Then my parents and I got cleaned up and went out to dinner, and I drove.
   Today, my father finished the deck and worked on the yard, and I wouldn't be surprised if the gazebo was put up, the furniture, tree and fireplace moved into it and everything was finished by the time I got home from work. I think they might be planning to put a TV out there too...not sure.

Aside from all of that, I desperately need one of my signature dark manicures. My nails look utterly dreadful. I've been thinking quite a bit about my appearance lately...not to a degree of vanity, mind you. But since I am no longer using sunblock, I now need to find what types of makeup will work best for summer...or if it really needs to be different from the "usual."

Just an idea,Angel.  Go onto to ebay to Southern Magnolia and check out their line.  It is mineral make-up with sunscreen.  I swear by it!  I'm a reformed Bare Minerals make-up wearer and would never go back to it after using this!

Sunblock is EEVIL   >:(  We're much better off wearing long sleeves and wide brimmed hats   8-)  

How come you feel that way,Trisha?  Not that I disagree with you,but just curious.....

Trisha: Or opera gloves and parasols.  ;)

Curlgirl: I checked out Southern Magnolia and it doesn't say how high the SPF is.  :-/  If it is any lower than say, 50, then it wouldn't benefit me. I'm also not a fan of mineral makeup, but my sister is...she's still shelling out the big bucks for Bare Minerals, so I'll have to tell her about Southern Magnolia instead. Thank you!  :)

Hair: Last night, I did a heavy EVOO treatment under a sleep cap. This morning, I clarified and sat out in the backyard with my laptop while my hair dried. Then I went back inside and did a S&D mission on another strand from the left side of my head. That lasted over an hour  :P  but the strand shaped up pretty nicely. Especially toward the top of where the breakage starts. Now if I could just do that all over my head, we'd be in business.
   I also cleaned one of my new Creative combs for the first time this morning. Went well.  :)

Love: Meh. No comment just now.

Life: So the backyard wasn't finished when I got home last night. Instead, I helped my parents start to set up the gazebo, but eventually, it became too dark to see anything. But it's coming along. Should be pretty cool when it's done.
   Still no manicure just yet. At the moment, I'm recovering from a hypoglycemic attack, so I'll have to wait until my hands have stopped shaking. Then I'll get my nails shaped and maybe ready for colour.
   Also, I applied for a new credit card today with no annual fee and 0% fixed APR for the first year. The credit line is...certainly more than I've ever had before.  :o  It rather feels like I've joined the ranks of financial adulthood. I don't expect that I'll use it all that much, but it's nice to know that it's there in an emergency. Plus, if you have a credit card and don't use it, your credit score actually goes up. It will help.
   Tomorrow, I'm being fire extinguisher certified at work. Woo-hoo.  ::)

ah nope,I don't think it is as high as 50.  I might be wrong,but your sis should check it out,she'll save alot of money,get samples with every order and alittle cash back,too!! ;)

Credit cards......wonderful financial tools when used properly, but can be your financial death if you get carried away with them.  If you are trying to improve your credit rating, you should use the card every month, and pay it off every month.  That will demonstrate your ability to manage your credit and pay your bills on time.

Fire extinguisher training!  Ha!  I've not been thru that for almost 20 years.  I always like taking an hour out of my day to put out a wastebasket fire!

Sunblock...well, first, I don't trust all of the ingredients used.  The feel of it makes my skin crawl, and the smell of it assaults my senses (even the so-called unscented has some odor).  Also, even the SPF 50 kind just doesn't seem to work for my sensitive skin.  Perhaps I'm 1/4 vampire or something.   8-)
No, give me long sleeves and a hat any day and I'm happy!   :)

Ah,can't blame for you for feeling that way!  I don't like the smell and feel of goop on my skin either.  That's why I don the "mineral" make-up.  The sun and heat aggravate my MS symptoms anyway,so I'm out of the sun,too Vampire sista!!!

That sounds like a good title for a book:  The Vampire Sista-hood!   ;D

*hugs to all my vampire sistas* lol you guys.  ;D

100% agreed on the sunblock point. Disgusting stuff. Not only must you walk around with a coating of sorts all day, but I have had said coating eat the finish right off of jewelry, nail polish, purse handles...no wonder it irritates my skin!  :o  No, I'm afraid that avoiding contact is the only real solution, whether with conservative clothing, portable shade or a nocturnal lifestyle.  8-)

Well, yesterday was something of a bust. The only good thing that came out of it was getting to use my new Pantene Nourishing mask for the first time and really liking the results!  :D  After washing all of my hair with Ice Shine shampoo (running quite low on it now) and squeezing the excess water out with my microfiber towel, I worked a generous amount of the Nourishing mask into the length of my hair and let it set for an hour under a shower cap. The mask itself feels like liquid satin...and that's exactly what my hair felt like after I rinsed it out! I was quite pleased.  [smiley=bath.gif]
   Anyway, conditioned once more with DMR conditioner, dried again with my microfiber towel, then ran the Silkening crème through the length. I actually ended up leaving my hair down all day because I was going to do a S&D on another strand but....things seldom go according to plan.  :(

After neglecting to eat for over 6 hours, my stomach bubbled up furiously, putting me in excruciating pain. A lovely little metabolic reaction that I seem to have had since birth. So unfortunately, I missed my fire extinguisher training yesterday and didn't get certified.  :(

Oh yes, and there was another little incident earlier that morning, as I was doing my hair treatment. See, when I woke up, I had told myself to just focus on the treatment and the time. Don't get caught up in anything else. But did I listen? Do I ever?  ::)
   A spur of the moment decision to wash a load of delicates turned out to be pretty catastrophic, as right in the middle of the wash, the draining hose from the washer popped out of its usual place in the deep sink of our garage and went spraying all over the floor, flooding it.  :o
   So I dashed around the garage, first securing the draining hose to the faucet above the deep sink so it couldn't flood anymore, then moving things out of the way, soaking up the flood with whatever I could and finally grabbing a huge box fan to dry the garage floor. Some of my father's clothes were soiled and soaked in the process, so I threw them in the wash after my stuff was done. It all seemed to work well enough, and I even had things under control before the time came to rinse out my hair treatment. Everything was pretty much dry by the time I had to leave for work except the mats on the floor of the garage. When my father got home from work, he realized that there had been a flood, but surprisingly, I didn't catch #&%@ for it.  :-/

As for my stomach, it didn't completely settle until just before I went to bed last night. 4 Pepto Bismol tablets, a light dinner and talking to my long-distance BFF helped. Especially the latter. And regarding the boy, I've pretty much decided to stay right where I am and stick with him since there was no actual betrayal, nor the intention thereof. Our romantic relationship is strange and quite damaged at the moment, as can be expected. But I have always said that where there's love, there's hope.

This morning, I noticed that my hair is slightly darker than both 1.) a Frappuccino, and 2.) a cardboard box. Interesting.
   Today was a regular CWC, but I didn't apply the Silkening crème, so my hair is naked, essentially.  

As for my nails, they are now shaped and ready for colour. The only question now is...solid black, metallic black, blood red, midnight blue, dark purple, pewter...?  ;)

ooh, ooh, go with the red! LOL.
I'm sorry you had a minor flood... at least you got it taken care of! I hope today is a much better day than yesterday, at least.

I vote blood red!

Count me in for blood, too...er, blood red, that is...there goes that vampire thing again...   :o

LOL @Trish. I would use sunscreen, but I can't remember to apply it. I'm not as adverse to it as you paler people, oddly. I prefer long lace sleeves though, if given a chance. Protection from the sun + a measure of coolness.

As for mineral makeup... I rarely use anything on my face at all (besides witchhazel and the occasional eyeshadow) because foundation, base... etc. just feels too odd. Of course, I've never really known how to use it properly so that may account for part of it.

Inspired by angel, my nails are now a nice gleaming black. *has no dark red*  I wonder if I added some black to a mostly empty bottle of red, if that would work or ruin what's left of the red..... :-?*goes off to test*

A Day In The Life Of Angel's Hair: Gave the S&D treatment to another strand yesterday afternoon. It took over an hour, as usual.  :P  There is sooo much more damage than I even realized. Thank goodness that it's confined to the ends! But getting rid of it all will take a long time. My poor hair has been through so much.  :'(
   After "The Distant One" dropped a bomb on me that I completely didn't expect, I wove my hair safely into a braid and fled to the coast, overwhelmed with emotion. I did end up writing a bit (finally, the urges are returning!), though nothing notable.
   Upon returning, I took my hair out of the braid, finger combed, applied a heavy dose of EVOO for the night, and slipped on my sleeping cap all while talking to "the boy." Unfortunately, nothing was resolved but I was too exhausted to shed more than a few tears.

This morning, I meditated a bit and did the deep breathing exercises suggested by RTG, which did help with the physical side effects of my anxiety (thank you, RTG). All of this emotional stress cannot be good for my hair, and I can't help but wonder if it will ever really be over while I'm involved with this guy. He's got issues...but what guy doesn't?  >:(

Anyway, I washed all of my hair today with Ice Shine shampoo, then towel dried and worked Pantene's wonderful Nourishing hair mask into the length where I left it for an hour. Then I rinsed and conditioned with DMR conditioner. Towel dried again and worked the Silkening crème into the length. Magnifique. I think it is now finally dry.

As yet, nothing is resolved with Mr. Long Distance. I'm still very confused by what he told me and wonder how much truth it actually renders. I've more or less decided to hang in there for one more month, giving our strange pseudo-relationship a full year. A year is certainly enough time to know whether this kid is ever going to get it together. Meanwhile, I'm emotionally preparing to let him go...I guess I have been for awhile.  :'(
The drama never freaking ends.

Other: The gazebo in the backyard still hasn't been finished and my nails are still naked, though I have decided on the blood red (thank you, ladies  ;)) when I have the time. Probably tonight.


Quote:

Inspired by angel, my nails are now a nice gleaming black. *has no dark red*  I wonder if I added some black to a mostly empty bottle of red, if that would work or ruin what's left of the red..... *goes off to test*

lol K. "My Angel"...I like that.  :)  Adding a few drops of black to any nail colour will darken it. But you must be careful with red. If it gets too dark, it ceases to look like dark red and looks more like chocolate brown.
   Also, sadly...lace sleeves (as well as any other transluscent fabric) offer zero sun protection. Although, if the lace remains in one constant position, you might be able to tan or burn interesting patterns into your skin.  ::)

I'd go with the metallic black, but that's just me...

LOL

Been a while since I dropped into your journal (or my journal, or anyone's journal...) I wanted to be up to date on the drama.  ;)  So what is this nourishing mask and silkening creme you speak of?  Both Pantene?  It's been a while since I've been scoping for new products, but now you've given me the urge and I want to!  You like the Ice Shine, Angel?  That's one that I just can't continue to use, I think it just leaves too much of a coating on my hair, which is probably the whole idea, but my hair doesn't do well weighed down like that.  I did manage to use all the condish up, but I've got nearly a full bottle of the wash which will probably never get used.

I think, acutually, my fav Pantene line right now is the Brilliant Brunette.  Not really for it's "colour enhancing" properties, but for it's over-all effects on my hair.  Not too heavy, not too light, falls in between and is just right.  You try their colour line yet?  Curious to see what you think.

((((((hugz))))))) take care

Maggie: *hugzzzz* Always awesome to hear from my Pantene sistah.  ;)  And on that subject, yes, the Nourishing mask and Silkening crème are both Pantene products. I'm not terribly thrilled with the latter, I must say. But the Nourishing mask is quite awesome.  :D
   Also, yes, I was fond of the Ice Shine S&C. I have no idea what you mean about the shampoo leaving a "coating" on your hair, as it is designed to have the opposite effect, taking away the grime and residue so light may penetrate and reflect. I'm wary of Pantene's crème (opaque) shampoos for this reason. Those are the type that leave my hair a coated mess.  :P
   As yet, I've not tried anything of the Expressions lines. Well, ok, I used my mother's Red Expressions conditioner once after rinsing a treatment out, but that's hardly enough to judge by.  ;)  I've been eyeing the Brunette Expressions S&C though, definitely.

And just for the record, I was leaning toward the metallic black polish myself, but went with blood red instead. Ah well...there's always next week.  ;)

Hair: Went hog wild at Target once again over the weekend (as I so enjoy doing) and picked up 2 big bottles of Pantene Full & Thick S&C in addition to a basketful of other items. Just by chance, I noticed that Goody released their fall collection of hairtoys already, so I couldn't resist looking. And thank goodness I did, because I found a pack of 2 thin, satin headbands: one black and one burgundy. Absolutely 100% hair safe. Those came home with me as well.  ;D
   Today was my first day using the Full & Thick S&C. I'm using the conditioner as the first step in my CWC's and still using Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal as the "heavy" conditioner. Too soon to judge how it's all working just yet, needless to say.

Goth Kisses: Today I also got to try Hershey's semi-new dark chocolate Kisses, as a bag of them randomly showed up in my office. No complaints there!  ;D  Not only are they dark chocolate (Lordy, do I love dark chocolate!), but they happen to be wrapped in dark purple foil and the label that conventionally sticks out of the top has the word DARK printed on it repeatedly in dark purple ink. I definitely give these my official goth stamp of approval.  ;D

Other Little Gothic Points Of Interest: My nails are now shining like perfect little droplets of metallic blood.  ;)  Already, they need a slight touch up and another clear coat, but otherwise, much better than bare.
   Yesterday, I learned that a black, velvet blazer that I've been coveting is now finally available in my size. So I ordered one without hesitation - every woman should have a versatile blazer in her wardrobe. One that she can just grab and know that it will work with whatever she's already wearing. Now I can finally stop dragging my Edwardian jacket all over town and save it for the sort of outfit and occasion that it deserves.  ;D

Long Distance Craaaaap: Well that about says it all, doesn't it?  ::)  We're hanging in there, God knows how. For the moment, little miss out-of-state has been posting less often on his MySpace. Wishful thinking on my part that she's found some other poor sap to obsess over. But she's still visiting him next month, so I have that to look forward to.  :P  >:(  Now, I understand that this chicky is a family friend. What I do not approve of is the fact that 1.) I know she's only visiting because she has a crush on my guy, and 2.) he's not doing anything to extinguish her flame. I understand his not wanting to hurt his friend's feelings; however, how much respect is she showing him?? There's my problem in a nutshell. I guess he's just been lying low, hoping that her feelings will pass. A terribly passive approach. *sigh*
   For now, though, we're still long-distance bff's. He can wish all he wants to be more than that, but until he cleans up his act, that just isn't possible.

Other Stuff: The backyard gazebo is now finished and even electrified! Nothing has been moved into it yet except an artificial, lighted tree. I'm curious to see what all my parents will put in there. In any case, I now have a new place to hang my jeans out to dry.  ;D
   Today, I have learned that my "usual" makeup will work during the summer if I stay out of the sun. A semi-nocturnal lifestyle makes that a little easier.
   Speaking of nocturnal, there's a full moon tonight. I should make the most of it.  ;)

Ciao for now.

Blaaaah. I hate being up this early.  :P
Had to fight the usual little pang of nausea this morning, but oh-so-fortunately, an unexpected drop-in visit from a huuuuge daddy long legs spider in the bathroom was enough to scare the "walking dead" syndrome right out of me. I couldn't even shriek for fear of waking my family.  :o

Anyway, just a simple CWC today. Pantene Full & Thick S&C, then Pantene DMR conditioner under a shower cap while I finished everything else. Slightly warmer water this morning than usual, but then...mornings are a bit colder. SoCal doesn't start to really heat up until about 10 am. I've also realized that I'm not such a fan of Dial's Tropical Escape fragrance. Oh well.

Hair is down for the moment. When I get home, I'm going to isolate another small strand of hair and do a S&D. I learned from yesterday's "mission" that the damage is especially bad behind my ears. This more or less confirms that a great deal of said damage came from sleeping on my infernal ex-bf's infernal flannel sheets  >:(  and then having to detangle the hopeless rat's nest the next morning.  >:(  Curse him! Curse it all!

But I'm not about to let him win. I'll S&D every day if I must to get the damage under control, and in a few years, it will be grown out entirely. What a relief it will be to have all of my hair from the past few years gone also. God, what a stressful time.  :P  So many memories and energies that it carries within. Living nightmares, liberation, happiness, illness, busted relationships, empowerment, sin, self-reliance, certainty, uncertainty, violation, scandal, infinite tons of pain. Heavy, man. I'll be glad to have all of that gone and hopefully replace my hair's energy with something a little less chaotic.

Things are marginally better on the romance front, but facts are facts. I know that this guy loves only me, but still...
   The words of a dear friend still echo in my mind: Love is an action, not just a feeling.

Tonight, I will probably do a heavy overnight EVOO treatment, then clarify the next morning. Oil and vinegar...hair salad.

One day...(you'll know where you are)
I am gonna grow wings
A chemical reaction
Hysterical and useless
Hysterical and

Let down and hangin' around
Crushed like a bug in the ground
Let down and hangin' around
                           -Radiohead, Let Down

Welcome to August.  :P

Every so often, I like to glance back at my old hair journal and look at what I was doing at this time last year. In part because I find it interesting and also because sometimes it can offer a clearer perspective of the present.

As of 8/1/06, my hair had just measured in at 22¾". I was using Pantene Breakage Defense S&C, which I kind of like better than what I'm using currently. In the evenings, I was helping my parents remodel their kitchen. It was my last day housesitting, and I'd finally gotten the last of my things from the dreaded ghetto apartment that I shared with my ex and moved them back into my parents' house. It was also my first night sleeping in my old room again.

Today, I clarified with the usual method. Pantene Purity shampoo, vinegar rinse, another Purity wash, then conditioned with DMR conditioner. Nothing else. I totally spaced on the heavy EVOO treatment that I was supposed to do last night. D'oh!

So now I'm at 24½". BSL is not far off - I think it falls at about 25½" on me, though I'd have to measure again to be sure.

Every day, I've been doing S&D's on small sections of hair. And it's going to take awhile...my hair has the worst case of stress damage I've ever seen.  :(  So I'm snipping off the evil ends whenever I see them.

I have also been living with my parents again for a year now.  :-/  Embarrassing to admit, but it's better than it has been in the past. And it's certainly better than where I was a year ago. Good to get all of that smoke out of my lungs.

Strangely enough, I've maintained a vegan diet all day. I'm not vegan, but it's an interesting change of pace. I'll probably ruin it with dinner, but whatever. I'm also going to try and resume my nocturnal power walks every other night. Last fall, I was about 6 lbs. heavier, so my little rock & roll figure is very slowly returning. Those last 10-15 lbs. are always the hardest to lose.

So in about 3 weeks, little missy will be visiting my bff and his family again. This had better not become a bi-monthly occurrence.  >:(  Yeah, it irks me. It irks me that this chica thinks that she can move in on my guy, fully aware that he's already spoken for. It irks me that he's not doing anything to make her stop, even though he's not cool with it either. *sigh* Whatever. It's out of my hands, really.

I'm going to try not to let all of that bs ruin the rest of the month for me. No sense stressing about what you can't fix, right? Fall merchandise will hit the shelves this month, and I'm looking forward to that as always. But...yeah.

Wake me when the month is over.  :P

Yesterday, I did a simple CWC. The usual routine. Silkening crème, air drying, detangling, S&D, braid. I also did a heavy EVOO treatment with a sleep cap last night because I knew I'd be washing all of my hair in the morning.

Today was a WTC. Still using the very awesome Pantene Nourishing mask. Right now, it's still a little bit damp in the back. I can't decide if I should braid it when I get my break in half an hour or just leave it down until after my S&D mission is finished. I'll do that when I get home as usual. I've been doing them pretty much every day with different little sections of hair each time. It's a ton of work, but I already see a significant difference between the left side of my hair (which has been worked on) and the right side (which hasn't). And I think that I am definitely going to get a trim in November.

As for everything else, my dad is playing both tonight and Saturday night at the usual hangout. Not sure if I'll get suckered into going or if I'll just kick it at home with spooooky programming on the Travel Channel and do my nails.
   My far-away friend is on family vacay until Tuesday. *sigh* He said he'd call often.
   And the friggin' phone is ringing incessantly, so I must go.

Happy Friday, all.

Alrighty, where are we again? Oh yes, the bloody beginning of August.  >:(  It's hot. And bright. And sunny.  >:(  And I'm an emotional mess (not that that's new).  >:(

Saturday was fruitful. My hair got a CWC with Silkening crème, and I picked up 3 new books, a new CD, a new DVD, a big, black storage box and some other things. I would also like to take this opportunity to state that the Traveling Wilburys was one of the best bands ever. God rest ye, Nelson/Spike and Lefty.

Sunday was boring. Another CWC for my hair, but without the Silkening crème. Nearly 2 hours were spent on a single strand S&D mission after my hair dried. Then, I just braided it.
   The rest of the day was spent playing dress up, doing my nails and crying to old Reba songs.

What else? Today is 3rd day in a row CWC-ing. Tomorrow should be no different as I will likely have the morning shift. Ugh.  :P
   Friday night, I took myself out to the ol' picture show...and have decided that I am the best date I've ever had.  ;D  I didn't have to dress up or put on makeup - just washed my face and went. No pressure. Before the movie, I bought myself a dark chocolate raspberry Chocolixir and bar from Godiva. I entered the theatre with time to spare (as others in the past have caused much inconvenience by being late), got a large popcorn (all to myself!) and saw the movie that I wanted to see (Becoming Jane). And afterwards, I drove myself home with zero physical expectations - not even the hope for a kiss goodnight.  ;D  Even though I paid for everything.

The wit that I would typically try to interject into this is falling flat, as the phone keeps breaking my concentration. I apologize.  :P

Anyway, the boy is still on vacation, though he could return home as early as tonight. He has called me every night since he left.
   Am I thrilled with him? Far from it. I sincerely hope that he's had time to think about our situation like I asked.

His little out-of-state "friend" is again counting down the days until she gets to see him. Pathetic. Makes me ill. And angry. Whatever. If he can't make her understand that it ain't happenin', then I'll make him understand that we ain't happenin'. I am at wit's end and anxiety has returned. I need to meditate tonight.  :P

Peace, people.

Sounds like you had a good night!
LOL, that last bit there, reminds me of a scene from the movie version of the Phantom of the Opera... Minnie driver's character Carlotta is throwing a fit about the mishaps happening in the opera house and she says something so very similar... "if this theeng does not stop happeneeng... THIS thing*points to herself* does not 'appen!"

*hug* I hope everything works itself out for you.

Thanx, K. *hugs* I actually haven't seen the latest incarnation of Phantom Of The Opera.  :-[  Though I am a fan of the Lon Chaney version.

So yeah, morning shift. 4th day CWC hair. Ew.
I'll try to do a S&D on another strand this afternoon. The pokey ends are slowly becoming less of a problem between my cutting them off and growing them out. The main part of the damage is now about level with my collarbone. O, hairgods! Make all of this evilness disappear quickly!

No meditation last night - the boy came home early.  :)  He showed me a few pictures from his trip, but sadly, the vast majority of them didn't turn out. He took it very hard, poor kid.
   On the pseudo-sort-of-relationship-but-not-really front, he says he'll fix things. I am slightly encouraged, even if naively so. As ever, we'll see...  :-/

Good luck on the boy front... too bad about the pictures.  :-/

As for the phantom.. I've never seen the lon cheney version.. I was a fan of the musical back when it had the original stage cast... The movie is good, but not quite there. Then again, the part of Christine was written for Sarah Brightman, and no matter how good Emmy Rossum is, she's never going to be quite at Sarah's level. Not many are. /end phantomgeek rant.

Kiraela: Thanx. Quite a few of his pix turned out, actually. He showed them to me, but was still disappointed, so I encouraged him to go downtown and take pictures of things that he was familiar with. So he did...and ended up with some great shots.  :)
 
Phantom, well...that's just the generation gap, I suppose. Young buck vs. old fart.  :P  hehe  Have you ever read the book? And I agree, Sarah Brightman is next to impossible to beat.

Hair: Yesterday was a much needed clarifying day. Washed with Pantene Purity shampoo, followed with a vinegar rinse, then another Purity wash and finished with Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. No additives, no leave-in's, just air dried and let it go. But I hate how dry clarifying makes my hair feel. Fine hair has a tendency to stick together in wretched strings that are nearly impossible to detangle.  :-/
   But I was able to do another S&D last night. I'm just grabbing strands at random now, going through them and cutting off all of the L-shaped ends that stick out. It's slow-going, but at least it's going, I guess.

Today was the usual CWC with Full & Thick S&C + DMR conditioner. Silkening crème + air drying. I plan to do another S&D when I get home. I'll try to do one every day until the pokey ends are under control. Sometimes I even snip them at work.
   After all of my current products are gone, I think I'll go back to Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense. I liked it best. And rather than using a light Pantene conditioner, I'll probably go back to Suave. And after that, no more leave-in crèmes. Only sprays because they don't gum up my hair. Still curious about Biosilk, even though it does contain oil.  :-/

Other Stuff: I could write a vulgar novel full of angry rants about "the boy," his inaction and his out-of-state "friend"...but I won't bother. Not worth it. The little missy will be going to see him in less than 2 weeks. He says that he will step it up and fix things for good, though I'm not 100% inclined to believe him. Actions (and inactions) speak louder than words and I cannot ignore his past performance. The pseudo-relationship that wishes it was is on hold indefinitely. I'm caught between holding out hope and preparing for the worst.

So I guess I'm back to my old schedule with the morning shift every Tuesday and Thursday. Joy.  :P  *collapses on desk*

Oh yes...and my velvet blazer arrived yesterday. Fits pretty nicely, but I may end up having it tailoured even still.

Thursday: Did a heavy EVOO treatment overnight under a sleep cap. I always load it on without worrying about it because it comes out in one washing the next morning.
   Also went for a power walk out of sheer boredom, and consequently decided to do so every night for a week. I'm down to about 116-117.

Friday: WTC with Full & Thick Shampoo, Pantene Nourishing Mask, then Full & Thick conditioner. Finished with Silkening crème, air drying, then finally combing and braiding.
   Finally discovered a suitable use for the Dove Cream Oil bodywash that had been sitting in my armoire. The first time I used it, I came out of the shower feeling like a wax figurine.  :P  Thusly, I decided that my car could benefit more from a wax coating than I ever would...so she basically got the most luxurious bath of her life. Nice to know that all of that lucious cream oil didn't go completely to waste.  ;D
   Missed my power walk because my exercise clothes were in the wash. But resumed yet another junk food strike, which I'll be sticking to for a week.

Saturday: CWC late in the day. The usual Full & Thick/DMR combo. The more I think about Breakage Defense, the more I miss it. The fragrance alone is sooo worth it!
   Also realized that my Dial bodywash is at least partially responsible for the strange smell about my arms. The base fragrance in all of Dial's antibacterial soaps is the same, and I guess my arms just retain that fragrance better than the rest of me. So I'm not buying it anymore...it reminds me too much of how my arms smelled after I fried them with Nair.  :P
   Today, I've stayed indoors doing laundry and watching movies, getting things clean while avoiding the ungodly SoCal summer heat.  :P  Man, I am really looking forward to fall!
   Day #2 of the junk food strike has been successful. I may go to Subway in a few hours and pick up a turkey sandwich for dinner.

Other: This weekend, I have the house to myself as my sister is in Maui and my parents are in Long Beach, celebrating their 33rd year of marriage.
   Things have improved on the romance front. Yesterday, I found a faint glimmer of hope when the boy told me that he would fix things permanently. I'm hoping, but also staying realistic.

Anyway, that's about it for now. I'm going off to start an S&D mission. Peace!

Saturday night, I did another heavy EVOO treatment overnight. Sunday morning, I washed it all out with Pantene Full & Thick shampoo then applied the last of my Nourishing hair mask and a new treatment: Moisturizing Essential Hydrating Rinse. Left that combination on under a shower cap for an hour, then rinsed out and chased with Full & Thick conditioner. The Nourishing and Moisturizing treatments are identical in texture - maybe they just package and label them differently. lol  ;D

Today was just a regular CWC. I'm hoping that my Silkening crème is getting used up quickly so I can go back to my Detangling spray.

The weekend was busy but rather uneventful. I did get a lot of laundry done and even found time to take a nice, relaxing bath with candles and a bath fizzie from Victoria's Secret - ooh la la!

My parents returned from their anniversary vacation on Sunday evening and had even been grocery shopping on their way back - they brought home a rotisserie chicken for dinner! *chomp* I gave them not one anniversary card, but 2.

On the health front, I managed to blow both my power walking routine and junk food strike. Between hypoglycemic attacks and just feeling too tired, I flat out gave up.  :P  There will be other weeks to torture myself in the name of weight loss.

So lessee...hair is still drying at the moment and I'll braid it later. Haven't had the energy/patience for daily S&D's...oh well. I've been feeling pretty drained and exhausted lately. And that's about it...at least all that I feel like writing on at the moment.

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I've been feeling pretty drained and exhausted lately

Me too, sweetie.  Mine is due to extreme heat.  Even though I'm in air conditioning 99% of the time, it's as if my body can sense the high temperatures and that simply wears me out.  So the whole month of August is pretty much a waste for me!   ;D  Hope both of our energy levels return soon.  *hugs*

hang in there angel, and don't get too crazy with the weight loss. do you even have much to lose? didn't sound like it from previous posts. i could probably stand to lose 5-10 pounds but am trying not to worry about it too much as i gained it all this summer job searching, and now that i have a job, will hopefully return to better, less stressed eating habits.   :)
also, do you wash or condition every day or do you take off days?

Trisha: Yup, summer sux for the vampire types. Though I never really considered that the heat might be part of the problem. For me, I think it might be a combination of things. But August is pretty much going to be a waste for me as well. And I hope our energy returns soon. *hugs*

RTG: I have about 5 lbs. to lose still before I'm finally comfortable. 10 would be great, but I don't know if that will ever happen.
   And I do at least a CWC every day. I only wash all of my hair about twice a week, though I'd like to bring it up to 3. The top half of my hair gets washed every single day.

Hair: The usual CWC morning shift routine.  :P  Full & Thick conditioner, Full & Thick shampoo, Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Then Silkening crème.
   Yesterday, I managed to do S&D on a small strand on the right side of my head. I'm afraid that most of the damage will have to be grown out and cut off, so I guess I'll be getting trims every 6 months. That will leave me with about a 1½" gain each year, but I'd rather it be terrifically healthy than teriffically long.

Other: The Who on the local alternative station? That certainly doesn't happen every day.
   My skin is in dreadful shape lately. I'm not liking many of the things that I've been using on it. This year, I've rejected at least 3 foundations and it would be pretty ironic if I ended up going back to the one that I started with.  :-/
   Nails are in dire need of a manicure once again. I'm thinking very dark purple when I get to it.
   The long distance thing...meh. If we survive, great. If not, whatever. I'll have what's meant to be in the end. I've been thinking a lot about karma and how decisions in my last relationship are affecting me now. So I've decided to change something in hopes that it will affect my current situation. A long-haired lady here once advised me: Be the kind of person you want to be with and you'll attract the right person. So that's exactly what I'm doing. Whether with this current guy or someone new, I hope that things will work out.
   So the rebirth continues...renewing, regenerating, restoring.
   Oh yes, and Blaqk Audio's album drops today. Stoke!

Well it's alright
Even when push comes to shove
Well it's alright
If you've got someone to love
Well it's alright
Everything will work out fine
Well it's alright
We're goin' to the end of the line
                        -The Traveling Wilburys, End Of The Line

good luck angel. i think you are on the right track about being who you want to be, and not worrying specifically about finding that right guy-letting him come to you if it's right-although that's easier said than done.

i'm still confused about washing only the top half of your hair. so i'm guessing all of it gets wet each time, but you only lather and condition the top daily?

as for the right foundation,i've stopped believing its out there. i don't wear it any more, just an occasional mineral powder for shine.

RTG: I know what you mean on both counts. The right person is someone who proves that they are. Whether I've found that person yet, well...I have hope, but really, I guess only time will tell for sure.
   Foundation, omg...I must be on my 4th or 5th one for the year.  :P  I've thought about mineral foundation, but it's bloody expensive and I'm not sure that they make one light enough for me. *shrug* Such is life.
   For washing, I usually do a CWC - you start by wetting your entire hair (cold water all the way through works best). Then apply a light conditioner (the cheap ones like Suave, VO5 and White Rain are best) from the ears down. Then take your favourite shampoo (you only need a little, since you'll only be washing the scalp) and wash just the scalp with the light conditioner still on the bottom part of your hair. It's ok if your head feels like it's kind of melting off. haha Anyway, then you rinse the shampoo and light conditioner off all at once - light conditioners can "clean" your hair more gently than shampoo. Follow with your favourite conditioner from the ears down. I usually leave mine in under a shower cap while I finish the rest of my "shower duties" before rinsing it out. Anyway, finish with a cold rinse and you're done. This method saves the ends of the hair (which are the oldest and driest) from having to be shampooed every day.

Hair: Clarifying wash this morning. Then air dried, combed and braided as usual.
   I seem to have misplaced my last seamless hairtie, so now I'm down to the Goody Ouchless kind with glue holding the ends together rather than a metal bar. These are much thinner than the hairties that I'd been using previously and I can wrap them around my hair more times. They're also more discreet, so I like them better. Not big on the little piece of glue that holds them together, but oh well.

Love: Things are improving...or are they?

Life: I'll be spending all of this Saturday with my 3 cousins as their parents will be out of town. So I'll be babysitting and chauffeuring from 7 am - 9 pm  :P  but fortunately getting paid for it.
   Sunday, I'll resume another 2 week power walking streak and junk food strike. I'll need something to help take my mind off of certain situations that have been stressing me out...  >:(  >_< *ahem* Plus, I'll get to reap the personal benefit of weighing less, looking better, feeling better and just being healthier in general.

So yeah, right now I'm pretty swamped at work, so I'd better quit typing.  :P

well try not to get too stressed by those situations and lots of cousins. :)
as for the mineral makeup, it is expensive if you buy the fancy ones. i just started buying  physicians formual min. powder which is at drug stores. not too expensive compared to other drug store makeup and i don't use very much of it.  but i also know better than to recommend makeup to others since everyone must exorcise their own skin monsters.  :)

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but i also know better than to recommend makeup to others since everyone must exorcise their own skin monsters. :)

lol @ "exorcising skin monsters." Well put, RTG.  ;D

So tomorrow is the big day. Actually, it's going to be a lot more relaxed than originally planned. The only driving that I need to do will be to take my eldest cousin to the beach midday - someone else is driving her home. And of course wherever I take the other 2 after that. We'll probably go to the movies. That would be cool.  :)

Today was the usual Friday hair routine. Washed all of my hair with Pantene Full & Thick shampoo, then towel dried and left the Moisturizing rinse in for an hour, then rinsed and followed with Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Silkening crème and air drying as usual.

I decided to try something different and bring a pair of scissors to work with me so I can do S&D during my break. Seems rather silly, since we have scissors at the office, but whatever. Didn't consider that at the time and my home scissors are newer and better anyway.  ::)

And now some very serious news. After 2 positive tests, my sister has undergone preventative treatment for early cervical cancer.  :(  In 2 weeks, she will be tested again and then we will know for sure whether she has it or not. God, when it rains, it pours. I am sick with worry. As if I didn't have enough anxiety from the drama of my would-be long-distance relationship, someone decided to smack me with this.
   I can only imagine how she must feel.

So again, I'll ask whomever may read this to please draw upon whatever faith you may follow and pray for my little sis. For those of you who do not follow a particular faith, I'll humbly request that you hope for the best and send whatever energies that you can summon her way. I myself will be doing both.

:(I'm so sorry to hear the news of your sister's results....I'm hoping and praying real hard that when she goes in 2 weeks for another test it will come back negative.  Maybe there is a chance it was a false positive????  Could that happen with the tests she underwent???  White Light is coming her way from me :-*

((((hugs)))) I hope your sister will be alright, she's in my prayers.

Prayers and positive energy coming her way (and yours, babe).  Keep us posted.  Let us know if we can help in any way.  *hugs*

Thanx, ladies.  :)  I appreciate it more than you know.
   My sister seems to have recovered from the procedure that she had on Friday, so all we can do now is wait for another test.

Yesterday, I resumed my power walking/junk food strike. I had a dream last night that I started unconsciously eating conversation hearts - yeah, those little Necco pastel hearts with messages on them that you see around Valentine's Day.  ;D  Just started mackin' on 'em without even thinking about it. I had a bag of popcorn as well (popcorn is one of my favourite foods and unfortunately one of the things that I am avoiding for the next 2 weeks). Anyway, once I realized that I was totally blowing my diet, I freaked and hid both items away in a drawer. lol Makes a lot of sense. You can imagine my relief when I woke up this morning and realized that I hadn't actually eaten those things.  ;D

Last night, I also did a heavy EVOO treatment under a sleep cap. When I finally roused myself from bed, I combed my oil-soaked hair out and did a regular old wash & condition. Followed with Pantene Silkening crème, and the length is still drying. I'm going to try and do a S&D during my break with the scissors from my office.  :o

Saturday was busy but not too bad. I first took my 3 cousins to lunch at Souplantation, then to Target so the eldest could get birthday presents for a few friends. She was going to a beach party later on.
   After that, we came home for a bit while she wrapped up her friends' presents and then the 4 of us piled back into my car to take her to said party. I'd been worried about finding the place, but it ended up being pretty easy.
   From there, I took the other 2 to the movie theatre, where we saw No Reservations. It was...so-so. Then we went back home - they took showers while I ordered a pizza. It wasn't long after we finished diner that my aunt returned home. We talked for awhile, she wrote me a check for my troubles, then I finally got to go back to my own house. Once there, I realized that I was more tired than I was aware of, and went to bed.

So little miss out-of-state (boooooo! Hissss!) will probably be at my bff's house tomorrow. *sigh* At this point, I've acquiesced to the idea that there is nothing I can do about said situation, so there's no point in freaking out about it. Yes, it sux that it's happening at all, but it's their choice, it's been arranged, and it has nothing to do with me. Whatever. Hope he knows how to swim.
   In any case, I'm coming up with a list of things to distract me in the mean time so I don't worry about it too much. Any suggestions?

Angel, am I mistaken in believing that you way under 120lbs (don't have time to go back and look).  For some reason 116 sits in my mind.  Unless you are well under 5 feet...stop worrying about it...men like curves!!!

JD

Angel, ya, 116-117 you said.  Unless you are about 4'8 - 4'10, give up on the model anorexic look.  My mother is 5'2 and 110 lbs...but doesn't have an ounce of muscle on her...or breasts (sorry Mom).  We call her knitting needle legs because she has NO muscle in her legs and she can't live 30 lbs or weight because she has not upper body strength either.

I am 5'2  At my fittest I weigh about 127-130 lbs.  At that point my friends and doctor tell me to lose no more weight because I am looking anorexic (sp) since I carry muscle and breasts.  Don't get obsessed by a number...if you are going to get obsessed by a number...check you % body fat...far more healthy and accurate than a scale!!! AT 5'2 and 130 lbs my % body fat was 20%.  The norm for my age is 20-30%.  I would be happy with 25% body fat now.  Right down the middle!!!

don't forget the BMI(body mass index)!

agreed! i've pretty much stopped worrying about weight loss since i eat well, excercise four times a week and am pretty strong but have curves. a few years back i was trying to get rid of the curves, but i like them now.

haha You guys are so funny...but unfortunately, your numbers are way off. I've never had an eating disorder, nor do I look the slightest bit anorexic...nor am I attempting to. BMI and body fat percentage are normal and will continue to be at my goal weight. Strength is not a problem, nor are curves. I have a very high metabolism and have been thin all my life. The only reason that that ever changed was because of a medication I was taking a few years ago, as I have mentioned several times before. It has taken a long time for my body to readjust, but I'm getting there. And certainly not by any unhealthy means. I understand that certain people become jealous of others' success, but that's their problem, and it isn't going to sway my dedication in any way, shape or form. Perhaps if these people focused more on their own will power rather than comparing themselves to and discouraging others, then they might find their own success and self-respect.

So Tuesday = clarifying day? It does this week, apparently. I have a full day tomorrow, so that will be another CWC. This morning, I used up the last of my DMR conditioner. Just as well, I suppose. Getting rid of any product is good, as I can replace it with what I really want. Looks like I'll be using Pantene Ful & Thick shampoo for awhile though, so I might have to keep getting the matching conditioner.
   Otherwise, hair is...somewhere between blah and behaving, I suppose. S&D's are sporadic now - I really need to do that more regularly. Every day would be best. And I'm actually looking forward to a trim in November. Yikes, that's in little more than 2 months. Isn't this year going by fast? As I've mentioned, I'm glad for that, as it helps to put some distance between myself and the constant dramas of last year.

My bff had a job interview today - 2, actually. One on the phone and one in person. And they called him back for another! Very good sign.  :)  Still not thrilled with lil' miss chicky spending so much time with him, but she'll be there tomorrow and there's nothing to be done about it. Now, it's just a matter of how quickly will the time pass...just get it over with. I'm really hoping that she goes back to school in September and won't be able to visit him anymore. And that he'll be too busy with his new job to concern himself with her.  ;D  What I'm really hoping is that he fixes things once and for all, and soon. Otherwise, I'm so done with this game. As ever, we'll see what happens...or what doesn't.

Alright, I'm sure I could write more, but work is getting really busy at the moment and it's difficult to keep a steady thought process.  :P  More later.

Thursday. Morning shift. Busy, busy, busy.  :-/
Yesterday I worked a 10 hour shift.  :o  And it actually wasn't all that bad, with the exception of my face looking like an oil refinery when I got home.  :P  It will give a nice little bonus to my paycheck though.  8-)

I wish that I could say I did something spectacular with my hair yesterday, but...no. Just a simple CWC + Silkening crème + air drying + braid. In other words, the usual routine. With work and life keeping me so busy, I didn't even have time to do S&D. It's madness.

Plus, little miss thang is visiting my guy now (I don't know that I can really call him that anymore), and predictably, I didn't hear from him at all yesterday. I doubt I will until she's gone. *sigh* On that note, I have set a date after which I will seriously reevaluate what's left of this...whatever you'd call it. I've already been thinking very seriously about it. Heavy stuff, man. Very heavy.  :(

Also, I forgot to mention...a few days ago, I got 2 new CD's: Blaqk Audio - Cex Cells and Bon Jovi - Slippery When Wet remaster. The former has been spinning in my car's player for days. Dig it.  8-)  And my music collection is finally reaching what I consider "adult" status, in that I'm finally getting sufficient quantity and diverse quality at the same time. It's come a long way since I had to begin rebuilding all over again after the divorce.

Anyway, between the craziness of work and the earliness of morning, my brain is mush at the moment. God, give me strength.

Please hold me now - I'm freezing
God, tell me how we ever got this cold

But oh my my
You're oh so sly
Let's leave unsaid what's left unspoken
And oh my boy
You're oh so coy
Let's just pretend that nothing's broken            
                -Blaqk Audio, Wake Up, Open The Door, And Escape To The Sea

Today brought the usual WTC routine for Friday. Washed with Pantene Full & Thick shampoo, then squeezed the water out with my microfiber towel and worked Pantene Moisturizing Essential Hydrating Rinse into the length, leaving it there under a shower cap for 1 hour. After rinsing it out, I conditioned as usual with the Full & Thick conditioner.
   Silkening crème and air dried as usual. It's down at the moment and pretty much dry. Every time I happen to see an ugly end, I snip it off. I've also been debating not cutting my hair at all for a year. Split ends haven't been a problem for a long time, so I could probably get away with it, if I was careful about not allowing the bottom part to dry out. And keep doing regular S&D's, of course. My next trim is supposed to be in November. Perhaps I won't get another until next November?  :o  Would be an interesting experiment, if nothing else.

Mr. Long Distance called yesterday, quite excited because he got the job that he'd been interviewing for. Under present circumstances, I couldn't join in his enthusiasm. All I could think was, great...now you can go and visit little miss out-of-state instead of her coming to visit you all the time! So I told him that I was very happy for him. When I checked his MySpace, I discovered that little missy had said exactly the same thing, in her traditional misspelled, smiley-ridden fashion. Only she had meant it. *sigh*
   He said that he would probably call back later that night......he didn't. No doubt that "celebrating" with lil' miss thang kept him until the wee hours.
   By now, it's pretty obvious what I must do. I'm just really not looking forward to doing it.  :(

So, stressed and depressed, I headed to the outlet center in the mountains of east county. It's always been a pretty spiritual place for me. There, I bought 2 new CD's: Oingo Boingo - Dead Man's Party and Radiohead - Hail To The Thief. I also caught the 9:00 show in the courtyard and discovered that a 6" sandwich from Subway can hold me over...for about 2 hours.  ::)

Returning home at about 10 pm, I changed and went for my nightly power walk. When I got home, I pretty much collapsed and fell asleep.
   Life seems pretty busy these days. Right now, I'm admittedly trying to make it that way on purpose, though I still do a fair amount of stressing/agonizing/obsessing over the current situation. With my sister's health and future at risk, I feel terribly selfish for worrying about something that seems so small in comparison.  :(  I should try to focus a little more on her and a little less on...him.  >:(  And her.  >:(

Oh my God! I just found about 3 hairs that were stretched beyond belief. All curled up, kinked and horribly damaged. Egad! How might that have happened?? Needless to say, they were cut out.  :(

Today, I discovered a very natural look using hardly any makeup at all. Concealer dotted on where needed and blended well. Just a liiiittle bit of loose powder all over, and lip balm. The latter isn't really "makeup," I guess. After that, I just shaped my brows and curled my lashes. Myself, only slightly better. I might get some clear mascara to complement everything else.

Anyway, I've yammered on enough, I think. After I drop my paycheck at the bank, I might go to the shore to watch the sun set. It's been awhile since I last did that.

I think watching that sunset will calm,center and  let you listen to your inner self.   I also think that you knew all along what had to be done and maybe weren't ready to do it. That's is perfectly fine,too.  I feel that time drawing near.  It's not an unhappy feeling at all,I get a sense of Angel being re-born from this experience and being happier and more centered because of the things you will need to do......just some of my thoughts.....listen to the waves,they can give you peace.

Sitting on the shore watching a sunset (or sunrise) always calms me.  I think the rythmic sounds of the water and the amazing colors of the sun help you to forget everything else for a few minutes.  This in turn allows your soul to replenish itself.  I'm always more "at peace" with myself and more calm.  I hope it can do the same for you. :)

Sometimes I feel like I can take the negative stuff, just to have resolution!  To get off the rollercoaster ride.  The worst, faced head on, is almost never as bad as when it is looming over your shoulder.  That said, I have had occasions I was dreading and when they arrived I discovered that everything lived up to my worst expectations and then some.  But the good thing is, it all ends eventually.

I tell myself this, when I am facing a bad moment.  "I plan on living until the age of 80.  This moment, bad though it may be, is only (whatever length of time) out of the next 40 years.  After I get through it, I've got 40 years of never having this moment again.  I can do this."  And then I do it.

Mr. Clueless doesn't deserve you.  Tell yourself that several times each day, until you are ready.  Then tell him.  

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Mr. Clueless doesn't deserve you.  Tell yourself that several times each day, until you are ready.  Then tell him.

I've been doing exactly that, Tex. In a little while, I'll be ready and I will tell him. And lol @ "Mr. Clueless" - I got a good laugh out of that.  ;D

Curlgirl: This experience may indeed be part of my rebirth. And I think you may be right about my knowing what I have to do and not being ready to do it. This drama has gone on for too long with too little payback to justify continuing it. As much as it sucks to have to pull the plug on a 2-year friendship, it appears that I have no other choice.  :(  Every woman should know when it's time to walk away.

As for the sunset, it didn't happen.  :(  I made it to the shores, but there seemed to be some sort of event in progress and there was nowhere to park. I circled the neighbourhood for awhile, hoping that a spot would come available, but it didn't happen. It didn't matter anyway because the sky was covered with clouds from a southern storm...so the sunset wouldn't have been visible anyway. Oh well.

Yesterday, my room got a good cleaning, including the ceiling fan, which I'm pretty sure hadn't been touched since the day it was installed.  :P  My hair also got a good CWC, with Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner and Pantene Full & Thick S&C. My scary toenails were cut and shaped to be ready for a fresh coat of black polish. I have also learned recently that salicylic acid does absolutely nothing for my skin.

So I tried out my new natural face yesterday afternoon, including the clear mascara that I bought on Friday. It works quite well - especially when I have to put myself together in a hurry.

Also, I tried out the Calgon vanilla swirl body spray that had been waiting for me in my armoire, but ugh! Not so great.  :P  Rather than smelling like a grandma wearing cheap perfume for the rest of the season, I headed to the mall in search of a great autumnal fragrance. I ended up getting 3 new body sprays from Victoria's Secret...and learned that they had discontinued my favourite perfume of all time. R.I.P., Halo.  :(  Guess I'll have to find a new favourite.

Mr. Clueless was back online last night. I presumed that to mean that little missy had left, and he said that she had - a long time ago. He also said that he'd fixed things with her, establishing that their relationship was a friendship only and LOL I'm being mauled by a hungry cat right now! Hang on...

*******************************

Ok, so they established that their relationship was just a friendship. Funny, but I thought that already had been established. And as much as I wish that I could just be happy with him, all I can think is that it's too late. Too much damage has been done and it's too late to make good on it now. He also doesn't understand why I'm upset and claims that he "didn't do anything." Oh really?? Because I would say that encouraging another girl's affections definitely counts as something. And ignoring the woman that you supposedly love while you disappear for days on end with some other girl...I'd say that counts for something as well. Oy! Why is it that men think that they never do anything wrong?
   Personally, I don't give a rip how "pure" his intentions may have been. While his feelings may have been true to me, his actions certainly haven't been. The bottom line is that he messed up, whether he sees it or not. And I cannot continue a relationship in which my trust has been violated and my respect for the person in question has been demolished. It really sux that it's come to this...that poor decisions on his part have crushed every ounce of potential that we once had. But that's life, I guess. No one ever said that life would be fair or easy.

Anyway, whoa, sorry for venting like that. I guess I felt that I had to clear the air. This drama has clouded my thoughts long enough, and I am finally beginning to realize where I stand. But enough of this heaviness...my toenails are in need of a great new pedicure to take them into fall.  ;)

Well I fought for you
I fought too hard
To do it all again, babe
It's gone too far
You never needed me
You only wanted me around
It gets me down

There's been a change
Yeah there's been a change of heart
Said there's been a change
You push just a little too far
Made it just a little to hard
There's been a change of heart

I'll get over you
It won't take long
I've stood in your gallery
Seen what's hangin' from the wall
You were the moon and sun
You're just a loaded gun now
It gets me down

There's been a change
Yeah there's been a change of heart
I said there's been a change
You push just a little too far
Made it just a little to hard
There's been a change of heart

Oh yeah, oh boy
Looks like we finally reached the turning point
Oh me, oh my
Looks like it's time for me to kiss it goodbye
Yeah kiss it goodbye

There's been a change
Yeah there's been a change of heart
Said there's been a change
You push just a little too far
Made it just a little to hard
There's been a change of heart
    -Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers, Change Of Heart

Oh, angel hon, I'm sorry it's come to this... *hug*  /You deserve someone who'll be there for YOU, not some random little bimbo.

I'm so sorry, Angel Spun. I second what Kiraela says, and go treat yourself to a nice hair toy or something else you've had your eye on. You deserve it!

((((Angel Spun))))

*hugs*  What is it the Marines say?  --Improvise, adapt, and overcome.   8-)

Welp,let's see here,you've gone to the mall and picked up new fragrances(taking care and pampering oneself:) ),you've cleaned your room and ceiling fan(cleansing is always a good thing!),you've done the hair,you've done the toes!  Sounds like you are showing care,respect and nurturing for yourself!  Well done,Angel!!  You're taking care of you!!!  That's your priority,has been before"Mr.Clueless" and always will be your number one priority....take care of Angel! ;)

Aww, thanx guys. *group hug!*  :)

Sadly, I came down sick Saturday night so I'll need to take even better care of myself now.  :(  Between that, mother nature and the drama with Mr. Clueless, I've been pretty wiped out. I want to just collapse and be unconscious until it's over, but life isn't going to allow me that kind of luxury.

Today was another CWC. Same routine, same stuff. I suppose I don't mind being stuck in a hair rut as long as said rut is working. I brought a pair of scissors from home to do an S&D during my break.

And yes, the toes are done. hehe A nice, shiny black pedicure is always a lovely finishing touch...even if no one ever sees it. My hands are a different story, of course. Man, do they need work!

As for my room, I still need to dust the top of my armoire. It doesn't look like that's ever been done - it's disgusting up there!  :P  The impending holidays will bring beautiful berry-coloured placemats and table runners in luxe fabrics into the stores, and I need to get a few to put on top of the wood furniture, like my dresser and nightstand, so they don't get ruined.

As for buying something that I've had my eye on, I just ordered a new skirt that should be delivered mid-September.

And as for Mr. Clueless, I've been keeping my distance. Partly to make him understand my resentment of things that he's done and partly to avoid more drama. But also to show him how it feels to be ignored. Detaching...that's what it is.

So that's all for now. It's almost time for my break.

((((Hugs)))) Some men eh? Take care. :-*

Lisabelle: ((((hugs)))) Men indeed. A man would've known better. This boy, I'm afraid, still has some growing up to do.

Speaking of "the boy," I spoke with him a couple of nights ago, and he'd wondered why I hadn't been around. Hmmm...how does it feel with the shoe on the other foot? It sux having to "repay" his karma like this...I'm pulling away slowly. Unlocking the iron lung that I've been living in for the last 2 years. It's going to be empty as heck without that kid in my life...but I know that I can breathe on my own, and I'll get by. And so will he in his own sorry way, I guess. In all honesty, I don't think that he ever falls in love deeply enough to stay there for very long.  :-/
   
After talking matters over briefly with my 15-year-old cousin, she ordered me to "dump him this minute!" lol Man, when it's that obvious to a 15-year-old, there's a problem.  ;D  But younger minds have a way of seeing more clearly through the complicated fog that we adults create around ourselves. She also has the benefit of being removed from the situation, seeing things from the outside rather than being caught up in the emotional aspect within, as I am. If she wouldn't let a boy treat her that way, why the heck should I?? That pretty much settled it for me. I knew that I could rely on her.  ;)

So anyway, hair!!
Yesterday was a clarifying day, as I'm apparently working Wednesday & Thursday mornings now. Fine by me, since it regulates my wash schedule a bit more. I tried a little something different by absent-minded mistake and left the conditioner on under a shower cap while finishing the rest of my shower duties as usual. Typically, on a clarifying day, I rinse the conditioner out after about a minute or so. But there didn't seem to be any harm done from leaving it on longer - au contraire. It seemed less dried out this time around...so maybe I've discovered something awesome. We'll see how it goes next week.
   Today was the typical CWC, Silkening crème, air dry routine. Ran out of my Pantene Full & Thick conditioner, so I'm going to Target after work to replace it with a bottle of Restoratives Breakage Defense (probably). Slowly filtering out the products that I'm not so thrilled about with things that I am. Full & Thick wasn't rich or heavy enough to provide really good conditioning.
   haha Finding the right hair stuff is a lot like finding the right guy.  ::)  You have to kiss a lot of frogs...or put them in your hair.  :-?  Yeah. Either way, you'll hopefully find exactly the right type that can be your steady constant forever without ever losing its wow factor. The type that wraps your hair in a luxe, golden embrace and makes it feel goddess-like...that does all of the right things and none of the wrong. It's out there somewhere...God willing we find it.

A few other notes...I seem to be shedding quite a bit lately. To the best of my recollection, such a thing didn't happen at this time last year. Factor in the crying spells that seem to strike at random, and I'd call it stress. As I've said before...wake me when this month is over.  :P

Walkin' away, I saw a side of you
That I knew was there all along
And that someday I'd say goodbye to you
'Cause one right can still make two wrong
Not for each other, not from the start
The difference was day and night
My finest hour, spent here with you in the dark
Was just before I saw the light

It's the people who want love and the people who need love
Who find love on the way
I'll be lookin' for someone 'til I find the right one
Then I won't be walkin' away
                   -Clint Black, Walkin' Away

Hey Angel!  One more day and this month is OVER!!!   8-)

On pins and needles, Trish, I'm waiting.  :-/

*pauses for a moment while Ziggy Stardust plays on the radio*

Ok, so yesterday was a slightly more involved hair day than usual. Roots were very greasy for whatever reason, so I ended up washing all of my hair once, then doing a CWC, so the roots got washed twice. I totally should've done a heavy EVOO treatment the night before but was too tired and it was too late. At least, that's my excuse.  :P
   Anyway, from there on, it was the usual routine. My hair stayed in one braid all day...well, kind of. There were a lot of pieces that fell out, but I didn't bother re-braiding or anything. Just left it while I washed my car and power walked, then took it down for bed.
   On the health front, I should note that my junk food strike voluntarily ended a few days ago. I should probably only do them a week at a time and then reward myself at the end, as I used to. Going 2 weeks at a time is asking a bit much when one is PMS-ing.  :-[  I have stuck to power walking nightly, however. After tomorrow night, I'll take it down to every other night, and hopefully not be so tired.

Today was a WTC - washed all of my hair with Pantene Full & Thick shampoo (totally should've done a heavy EVOO treatment last night - whoops), then left a conditioning treatment on for an hour. This was the honey/EVOO/aloe/Pantene treatment that I whip up sometimes. Anyway, rinsed that out after an hour, ran the Silkening crème through the length and let it all air dry. I combed it out during my break at work and noticed that something (possibly the treatment?) had left the middle and underside sections of my hair pretty greasy toward the scalp. Strange...it's never done that before.  :-?

I'll be braiding it all when I get home anyway. Hopefully do a S&D before then. The right side of my hair is finally starting to look less awful with the S&D's. I guess it will be an ongoing process.
   Oh yeah, and tomorrow is measure day. Huzzah.

So someone else asked me today why I always wear black. Tee-hee.  ;D  With as often as I get asked this question, you'd think that I'd have a plethera of witty responses poised and ready. Yet when it actually happens, I draw a blank. I do need to get better at this because the comedic potential is huge.
   In any case, my response to this particular gentleman was, "It's my favourite colour," followed with a fake, cheesy smile. ----> ;D  However, this young chap was bold enough to openly suspect that it was goth-related. So I rewarded his acuteness with honesty.  ;)  He seemed surprised by this.

Anyway, definitely some things to get through and look forward to this weekend. But I suppose the thing to remember is that 1.) I'll live through it, and 2.) once I live through it, I'll never have to do so again. Part of it is going to be very tough, but I have survived far worse. Wish me luck.

This, this is our new song
Just like the last one
A total waste of time,
My iron lung
      -Radiohead, My Iron Lung

Well, I have done absolutely nothing this weekend.  :P
I have no gas, no money and it's too %#$&ing hot to go outside anyway. Temps have been in the 100's and combined with the intolerable humidity, going out and doing anything has become infeasible. Cabin fever is setting in.

So last night, I finally broke things off with Mr. Clueless. *sigh* Thus ends a 2-year best friendship and a romantic entanglement that was simply not to be. It's my first day living without him, so things are kind of weird right now. But moving on was the best thing for both of us, so I don't regret it...it's just going to be in that surreal, empty-ish stage for awhile.

Alright, so...hair. The past few days have been the usual CWC routine. Today was a W-CWC, I guess, because I didn't have access to the shower until after 2 pm.  >:(  Blegh.
   Other than that, nothing special. I really need to do another S&D on the right side.

Yesterday was measure day and I came in at a disappointing 24¾". My hair growth always slows during the summer months. I've also noticed that the ends are starting to look ratty again, so that pipe dream of not trimming for a full year might have to remain just that - a dream.

Also, I have adopted a new hair hero of sorts. Davey Havok in 2003 (when he was about my age) had gorgeous hair! Long, black, wavy...the kind of hair that I have always coveted. I love watching his band's videos and performances from that year, partially for that reason.

So what to do with the rest of Labor Day? I think I'll touch up my new black manicure and then try not to ruin it while I find something to eat. Ciao!

The, erm, guy thing has probably been settle for the best, but major hugs to you.

(((((Angel Spun)))))

((((hugz))))),Angel!  You'll be ok,I know that surreal stage is kinda weird and funky,but healing is always slow.  Slow,but in the end so much better than when you started the process.
Just take care of yourself,always #1 priority!!!  Black manicure touchup????sounds like you are well on your way to comfort!(Searching for something to eat,too,that's all good!)

I applaud you for getting rid of that twit of a man.  (((hugs))) On to bigger and better things! http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/r/dance.gif

I'm just throwing in my compliments to you, on doing what needed to be done :\ even if it wasn't the most pleasant thing to have to do.  *hug*

Wow. I swear, the amount of support on this site is overwhelming. I'm touched.  :)
*group hug!!*

And lol Lisabelle...you and your emoticons.  ;D  I needed that.

Indeed, it was not a pleasant thing to have to do, but life isn't always pleasant. In fact, in my experience, it rarely is. We do what we must.

So today was a clarifying day. Clarifying wash, white vinegar rinse, another clarifying wash, then condition. Again, I left the conditioner in under a cap while finishing the rest of my shower, and again, my hair came out less dry than usual. I guess this will become part of the clarifying "tradition."
   No leave-in's as usual for a clarifying day. Just air dried and braided.

When I arrived at work and started finger combing my hair (it gets blown around a bit from the a/c in my car), my mother made a comment about how I always play with my hair and she wondered how it wouldn't be constantly greasy...especially given the fact that I wear hand lotion all the time (even though I wasn't wearing any at the time). Then she theorized that since my hair got so oily during the day as it is, perhaps it just didn't matter...or that the bottom could be as oily as the top with my fingers passing through it so much. Oy, that woman.

Anyway, as much as I hate admitting this, the thought of cutting all of my hair off has crossed my mind several times. Many times, actually...whenever I feel distressed and hopeless about its current condition. I know that such thoughts are not uncommon among longhairs, of course, and I would certainly never act upon them. Don't want to disappoint the fans, ya know.  ;)  ;D  One of my co-workers has done all but threaten my life if I ever cut my hair...so I guess I'll just have to tough it out.

So one day later, my oh-so-fabulous black manicure is beginning to chip already. Grrrr! I am never buying Express Finish again.  >:(  Thus continues the quest for the world's most awesome black nail polish. In the mean time, thank God for fine tipped Sharpies.

On the health front, I am now power walking every other night, and I'm going to see about doing ab work on those "off" nights. Weight is still slowly tapering off.
   My cold seems to be gone - as yet, I'm left with sore throats in the morning, but I can still sing, so it's all good. Honey lemon cough drops are my friends.  [smiley=thumbsup.gif]

Alright, I have about an hour left here before I must jet off to the bank, and then to Robeks...I've got a mad craving for an açai bowl.

Angel,

Well, if you have read my journal I am WAY behind on things.  I have seen for a couple of days that I had a message that there had been a response on your journal.  I had seen (before me absences) that you were thinking on about the boy (or Mr. Clueless as I see he has been dubed) .  I had thought I would suggest a pro and con list to help you decide.  Frankly, I am glad to see you have made a decision.  He was not giving you the respect you needed.  

Now those words are all logical and nice...but my heart goes out to you.  It is a really tough thing to do.  We are all here for you.  Hang in there and be strong.  Mr. Right is out there for you!!!  Sorry I am so late with my support...but they say it takes a woman twice as long to get over a man as the time they are together.  Frankly, I can tell you that is bull.  I was with hubby for 6 years with dreams of children when my time for kids is up and am over it after 9 months (ok, not the loss for my probably last chance for kids but for the man...yes).  You will be fine shortly...fret not!!

JD

Quote:

as much as I hate admitting this, the thought of cutting all of my hair off has crossed my mind several times

Ohmygod, SO HAVE I!!!  I was (and am) going to mention something in my journal, but you bringing it up is kind of bizarre.  

*hugs* about the ending relationship with the boy.  That which does not kill us makes us stronger...or some such rot.   ;)

Wow Angelspun, I'm sorry to hear about your break up. :'(  I know that the days following can be pretty tough but hang in there. (((hugs)))  I've learned it's best (IMHO) to keep yourself busy to avoid thinking about it.

As for your nails, I would recommend Revlon Color Stay polish, it holds up great, but I'm not sure if they make it in black.  If they do, you should definitely check it out.

JD, Trish and LD: Thanx, you guys. I do appreciate the sympathy. Somewhat surprisingly, however, it hasn't been all that tough. I'd been emotionally detaching from it all for awhile, so in my mind and in my heart, I had already moved on. All that remained was a formality, which I addressed as gracefully and honestly as possible.
   That's not to say that it's all been entirely without discomfort. Little things do get me down, but not for more than a few seconds at a time. As each of you said, I'll be fine. Certainly there will be more deserving best friends/suitors.  ;)

And thanx for the recommendation, LD. I have never known the Color Stay line to make black, but I guess it may be possible someday, right? I'm already a fan of Revlon's Dark Pleasures line.  ;)

Hair: The usual routine today. CWC, Silkening crème, air dry, braid. I need to do another S&D...I know that I say that all the time and never get around to it.  :-[
Other: I am now on track, alternating between ab workouts and power walking every other night. And I seem to be having LA withdrawal. Other than that, nothing new to report.

Hair: Another typical day in the life of Angel's hair. CWC, Silkening crème, air dry. I'm not braiding until later tonight, however, if at all because I want to try and do an S&D when I get home from work. Yesterday, I learned that my hair must be perfectly straight in order to do this.

Other: The real news comes on the health front today. During my power walk last night, I noticed that the temps had cooled quite a bit - to an inspiring degree, actually. This might have been an omen of good things to come...because this morning, I realized that not only have I dipped into the 115 lb. area, I have also lost an inch from my waist.  :D  Looks like all of that diligent dieting and exercise is indeed paying off. Rejoice in the descending of numbers.

Anywho, short entry today as the phone here is ringing nonstop!  >:(

Congrats,Angel!

Congrats, angel! BTW, I love the new avatar. New av. for a new chapter in your life? Anyway, tis very pretty!

Thanx, dudes!  :D

The avatar change is quarterly/seasonal, though I have been known to do so on a whim. I suppose it could coincide with a new chapter in my life, but that wasn't my reason for it.
   I have, however, removed a quote from my signature that had been borrowed from Mr. Clueless and will likely be replaced with something else next year. That was directly related to recent life changes/new chapters/etc.

Hair: Yesterday, I finally did an S&D on a small strand from the right side of my head. This is by far the more damaged side - even the smallest strands look hopeless and intimidating at first. But after about an hour of snipping, they start to actually resemble hair again...rather than Easter basket grass or whatever.  :-/

Last night finally saw a much needed heavy EVOO treatment. This morning, I washed it all out with Pantene Full & Thick shampoo, then treated for an hour with the last of my Pantene Moisturizing Essential Hydrating Rinse. It never seemed to do much for my hair, so I'm glad to be free of it...as with other things. *ahem*
   Anyway, after an hour, I rinsed and conditioned with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner. Decisions, decisions...I love Restoratives, but I also love Ice Shine. And if I'm using Ice Shine shampoo, am I obligated to its matching conditioner or should I use DMR? It's rather sad the amount of trivial thoughts that pass through my head.  :-/

Other: While my conditioning treatment was working its mediocre magic, I got to drool a little bit in front of the TV, as the Fuse channel was re-airing their Blaqk Audio interview on The Sauce from yesterday. Ohhh, Davey...so gorgeous! *swoon*  ::)  :-[
   
Yeah, anyway...shoot, what else was I going to mention? Oh right, payday! Payday = minor shopping spree, so we'll see what all I gather this time. After work, I'm jumping into crazed goth shopper mode and terrorizing the "upper crust" at my favourite mall, which happens to be the swankiest one in town. The Godiva boutique is most definitely on the list, since I have a buy one, get one free coupon.  ;)

After that, a power walk and a new, sparkly black manicure are absolutely required.

Alright, less than half an hour left here, then it's off to the bank and then to my dad's work to give him a ride home. Wonder what sort of musical "atrocities" I'll expose him to on the way.  [smiley=evil.gif]

Well, the weekend has been going pretty well...with the exception of the dreadful manicure that I now seem to be sporting.  :-/  It's a clear base coat + 2 coats of metallic black + 2 clear topcoats + glitter + 1 more clear topcoat. It started out as just a regular metallic black but evolved into the cosmetic abomination that it has become when the first attempt was botched and began to chip shortly after. Oy, and this is somehow better than having my nails done for me every 2 weeks? I swear, it looks like Melrose Avenue Barbie or something.  :P

Anyway, on the hair front, today was a regular CWC + Silkening crème. After my hair had air dried straight, I did yet another S&D on yet another small strand from the right side. I'm actually starting to see progress over there! It's astonishing. I can't wait for my trim in November. My poor hair has been through so much.  :P
   This afternoon, I told my sister that I'd been thinking about cutting my hair. She looked confused and asked, "Why?" I told her that I was getting tired of it (for the record, I'm tired of the condition of my hair, not the length). She didn't seem to think that cutting was such a hot idea. So no need to freak out - I wasn't really going to do it anyway! I just think about it sometimes.  :-[

So onto the subject of things that are working in my favour. Starting with my trip to the mall last night - woooooot! I used my buy one, get one free coupon at the Godiva boutique then bought some Urban Decay makeup from Sephora. It was my first time buying designer makeup, and I nearly passed out when I heard the total  :o  but after some deep breathing and self counseling, I was ok. lol I got 3 killer new eyeshadows and a lipgloss that I've been coveting for years.
   Another impulse buy that I love...my raspberry Jell-O flavoured Lip Smacker lipgloss. Yep, I'm almost 28 and still wearing Lip Smackers...and liking it. Haha! I think I'll start wearing it every day.
   Anyway, that basically concludes my giddy shopping frivolities. Oh wait, I also got a new belt...black (duh) with 3 rows of pyramid spikes. It's a little bit gratuitous mall punk, but I'm pretty sure that I can rock it like an adult.  ::)

So that's about it for the moment. I shall now return to the fog of Morrissey and Skinny Puppy from whence I came (I seem to be in a strange mood).  :-?

Hey I'm 40 and I still love and use Lip Smackers.  My fav is 1000 cookies http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/y/loveineye.gif  Urban decay make up is pretty cool.  I bought a lipstick from a Goth shop in Toronto, the color was gunmetal and the case was shaped like a bullet casing.  I found the lipstick greasy and did not have the best staying power.  Years ago Lancome came out with some cool black lipstick and awsome eyeshadow.  The shadows were black and white pans that when mixed made an awesome green or purple combo.  I have been known to pay a small fortune for makeup.  I remember my first big purchase.  I was eighteen working in Manhatten. It was a lipstick and a lip pencil at the Chanel counter.  I almost croaked when the girl said $65 bucks!
Have you ever seen the cartoon Ruby Gloom?  It's a cute goth story.  My new icon is the house cat called Doom Kitty.

Lisabelle: lol Yeah, that sounds pretty close to my own experience. And yes, I've seen Ruby Gloom...perky goths scare me.  ::)  But your icon is cute. I love cats. Especially black cats.

Hair: Another CWC. Usual routine, but today it's in a strange half-up style. I was trying to do something a little bit funky and edgy...too bad my hair does neither. lol But I took the top half up, twisted around once to make a small bun, then pinned it in place with 2 bobby pins and left the ends to fall however they wanted. The bottom half is just down. It doesn't matter if this 'do gets a little bit messy. I showed my sister just before I left for work. She said it was "pretty" and that she really liked it. After arriving at the office, I got another compliment on it from a co-worker. I wish I had a pic!

Other: So the theme for today is  :o
   This morning, I got to try out one of my new Urban Decay eyeshadows. A wild, glowing, loud, electric, screaming, bright purple colour called Flash. OMG.  :o  For the record, I had no idea that it would be this bright when I put it on. Holy cow. I feel like Ziggy Stardust.  :P  Not the best colour for me at all. I even had to change my shirt before coming to work because the strength of the colour was competing with what I had on before. So yeah, totally rockin' the glam rock reject look today. Yikes.

In other news, my sister got a new job...in a strip club  :o  ...as a waitress. But still... :o

And last night, a series of short dreams indicated that my next romantic prospect might be a straight edge guitar player.  :o  Who knew? hehe Watch your back, Jade Puget.  ;D

Also, my father polished out the scratches in the back bumper of my car...left over from my little accident a few months ago. It looks fantastic - you can't even tell that there's any damage at all unless you're really looking for it. He also washed my car.  :o  Gotta love dads.  ;)

Oh yes, and the evil black glittery manicure is history. I replaced it last night with a dark purple metallic. No more Glam Punk Barbie, thank God. I can't even imagine the combination of that and this screaming purple eyeshadow. Egad.  :o

Aw, he took it all too far
But boy could he play guitar...

hehe, you like black kitties? I'll send you one! I mean, you don't bleed easy, right...? :P I've been having issues with the BFs cat lately.

anyway, that first manicure... gutter glitter barbie? yeah. *shudder*

and as for the sister's job? don't feel bad, my sister was a stripper until the day she got married... not bad for a girl with two kids.(stretch marks, sagginess and all, she was still apparently the best looking woman there, which frightens me)

*hug*

Every cat I have had has been black, Puss, Chew Chew, Bo.  Even my bunny is black....hmmm I see a trend here. ::)

Lisabelle: hehe Black kitties! Everywhere! My first and only cat was a black & white with a regal personality (no doubt from her Siamese breeding). Even 7 years after her death, I can still say that she's the best friend I've ever had. Shoot, I'm crying now.

Kiraela: Sorry, but I've read about your bf's cat and I'm afraid that she wouldn't last long in my keep.  :-X
And lol @ "Gutter Glitter Barbie"  ;D  hehe Maybe I'll save that look and the wild eyeshadow for when/if I'm ever in a glam rock trash mode. lol Let's hope that never happens...
Sorry also for your sister's, erm, choice in careers. Hopefully she is setting a better example for her children these days.

Hair: Last night, I did a heavy EVOO under a sleep cap because I knew that I'd be washing all of my hair the next day.
   This morning was a clarifying routine, and I am now out of white vinegar. Why oh why did I forget that when I was at the grocery store last night? Now I have to go back. *sigh* Might as well pick up some blackberries or something while I'm there.
   For the sake of my skin, I may have to stop doing the overnight oil treatments. I'll continue using EVOO regularly until my current bottle is empty, then evaluate what effects it might be having on my skin. If the oil is passing through my sleep cap and still ending up on my pillowcase, I'll...whoa!

Everybody's movin', eeeverybody's groovin, baby... *boogies*

lol Sorry...Love Shack is on the radio.  ;D  Slave to the music, ya know.  ::)  Anyway, if there's any chance that oil from my hair is still ending up on my skin, I'll stop doing overnight EVOO's altogether and save any oiling for during the day, if at all.

Also, I may have hit an obstacle with Pantene Restoratives: the dry rash is reappearing on the back of my neck.  :(  This is a reaction that my skin has with many conditioners (anyone who followed my hair blog last year might remember the myriad of times that I had to deal with this while experimenting with different products) and I'm pretty sure it's caused by strong fragrances. Again, I'll use up my current supply and assess the possible damage...but it might mean that a permanent switch to Ice Shine is in order (which I wouldn't have a problem with at all).

Other: WHYYY, GOD, MUST PEOPLE BE SO STUPID?!?!

Back to the usual routine today. CWC with Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner, Pantene Full & Thick shampoo and Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner. Left the latter in under a cap while finishing the rest of my shower as usual. Then, it was Pantene Silkening crème and air drying...same ol', same ol'. I left my hair down all day at work so I could do an S&D when I came home.
   After an unsuccessful attempt at a nap,  >:(  I got up, changed clothes, did the S&D on a strand from the backside of my hair, then combed and braided. I just finished that a little while ago, actually.

Tomorrow, I will likely have the afternoon shift, so I should be free to do whatever with my hair in the morning. I'm thinking either a deep conditioning treatment or an updo of some sort.

Weight has gone up and skin is a disaster, so physically, I'm a trainwreck at the moment.  :P  Sometimes I almost wish I were vegan.  :-X  Too bad that my blood sugar/family/lifestyle would never allow it.
   Apparently, my mind is going too. Nah, I jest...it's been gone for quite sometime.  ::)  But last night, I had the most bizarr-o dream involving a castle, a jerk husband with a noble title (played by my former husband, no less), an enchanted forest and a talking worm?? Don't ask.  :-/  Angel's mind is a very strange place indeed.

Anywho, I'm off to make soup and get screamed at. Ta!

Another CWC today. Didn't have time for Silkening crème, so I just let it air dry. I'll comb and braid during my break.
   Most of the morning was spent rushing around between eating, doing laundry and having a shower and much needed shave. So I didn't get to do a conditioning treatment or updo or anything special. But I'll do a heavy EVOO treatment tonight to make up for it.

So only 17 more days of September. Before too long I'll be picking out pumpkins and pulling all of my black velvet and lace out of the closet. I even browsed the early Halloween section at Wal*Mart last night. *shudder* Yeah, I know...but Target doesn't have their stuff out yet.  :(
   Hopefully, it won't be too long before they start putting out all of the lovely holiday table décor. I need a placemat and table runner to match the bedding in my room.
   Just thinking of all of that holiday stuff in general makes me giddy and anxious. Good anxious. I can't help but wonder what sort of booty I'll make off with this year. Accessories, decorations, ornaments...clothes...jewelry...shoes! hehehe Easy does it, Angel.

In other news, Blaqk Audio will be in San Diego on the 26th, but it looks as if I'll be missing the show.  :(  And I'd been so looking forward to it...

Oh yes, and surprisingly, no one yelled at me for making soup last night. However, this morning, I was ordered to do the dishes and clean the kitchen sink.  ::)  Whatever.

No comments, dear; just wanted to say I hope you have a good weekend!   :)

Thanx, Trish.  :)

Hair: The usual WTC for Friday. Today, I got to break in the Pantene Fortifying treatment that's been sitting in my armoire. Left that in for an hour after washing, then rinsed out and followed with Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner. And I was absolutely right about the latter burning the back of my neck. I noticed that familiar chemical burn-y sensation beyond any doubt when I used it this morning. So, needless to say, I won't be buying Restoratives again. *sigh* So ends another Pantene partnership.
   Buuuuuut...it's alright. All of the hair stuff that I'm currently using is nearly gone, so I'll need to pick up something new after work. And how does one commonly treat burning sensations? hehehe Ice them.  ;)  I think I'll pick up another jar of the Nourishing mask as well, so I can compare it with the Fortifying treatment and see which works better. heh For all I know, they're probably the same product in different packaging, but...whatever.  ::)

Also, I'm not seeing the advantage of overnight EVOO treatments. I do them once or twice a week, but they don't seem to do much of anything for my hair. And I don't think that I can justify the breakouts and lack of sleep suffered because of them. This may well be another thing that I give up once the bottle is empty.
   Part of the whole hair growing experience is learning what works for your hair and what doesn't. Oil doesn't seem to do anything for me. At least not anything good. Perhaps there is an alternative for freaks of nature like myself. Maybe a little more leave-in conditioner applied to the ends of my hair would work better?  :-/  We'll find out when the last of my EVOO is gone.

Other: After several weeks of trying to grow my nails out, I spazzed and started scratching everything in sight. The feeling of having nails "too long" annoys me beyond belief, so this morning, I cut them all to the quick. Guess I'm just not cut out to have long, glamorous Marilyn Monroe nails...which is fine considering that I'm an artist/musician/typist and am always doing something with my hands. It's a mystery to me how women like Dolly Parton and Charo can play guitar with superlong nails. I'm pretty sure that my bass strings would shred mine in an instant. Just as well.

Weight is back on the slow decline. Very slow. But better than nothing, I suppose. Still power walking and ab training, alternating so that I'm doing something every night. Been debating a week-long vegetarian diet, just to see if I could get away with it. What I need is another week without junk.

Ordered a couple of new tops from Newport News. Their fall selections haven't been jaw-dropping, but there are a few nice pieces. Hoping that winter will be more interesting. Ahh, yes...winter. Most delicate and dazzling of all seasons...I can't wait for it to arrive. It won't be fall yet for another 9 days and I'm already psyched for winter. But that's where my heart is permanently. It's also when my hair grows fastest.  ;)

Anyway, another half hour earning a meager existence before I'm free for 2 days to appreciate said existence. Maybe I'll pick up the bass guitar that I've been neglecting for a month...  :-[

Bon week-end, tout le monde.

Ugh, I haven't done my nails in a long time!  I'm pretty much over it, unless it's one of those special occasions that seem to at least in my case, only happen once in a blue moon. :P

I'm also trying to lose a few lbs which with all of my working out is only peeling off slowly.  Unfortunatley, I think that the smaller you are the more difficult it is to lose weight.

I got the new Newport News catalog and saw some nice pieces as well.  I love that they constistantly offer victorian type pieces and various lace selections.  
Enjoy your purchases! :D

As for the vegetarian eating, I've learned that eating meatless products make the transition much easier.  I eat boca and tofurkey products and find them quite tasty.  I'm not sure if you've tried them, but of course they won't taste exactly like the meat you're used to.  I think if you go in with this in mind, then they can be a nice alternative. :)

La Diosa: lol Sometimes I just give up on my nails as well and neglect them for awhile. But I'm usually sorry if I do because they, like my hair, are extremely fine and thin and break easily. I usually keep them manicured not just for æsthetics, but to prevent them from chipping. Genetics are wonderful, aren't they?  :P


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Unfortunatley, I think that the smaller you are the more difficult it is to lose weight.

Agreed. Not to mention that those last 5 - 10 lbs. are the most difficult to lose!  >:(


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I got the new Newport News catalog and saw some nice pieces as well.  I love that they constistantly offer victorian type pieces and various lace selections.

hehehe Oh honey, you should see my closet.  ;)  The vast majority of what I own is Victorian or period-influenced.

As for meat alternatives...I did have a Boca patty once on a burger that I got at Claim Jumper. My sister works there and had recommended it. Not too bad...but not too good either.  :-/  Tofurkey is blasphemy, IMO. lol But hey, if they work for you, that's awesome.
   Of course, I'm not actually considering going vegetarian or anything. I was just sort of wondering "out loud" what would happen if I tried it for a week. Whether it would be as effective as my junk food strikes and what sort of obstacles I would encounter, etc. I may try it yet, but no hurry. Nothing against the herbivorous audience, but I won't be "converting" anytime soon.  ;)

Hair: Yesterday was a typical CWC routine. Today was a W-CWC as I had to wait until noon to take a shower.  :P  All because I found a dead pincher bug in my "hair" drawer and pulled out a vacuum to clean it out.
   And now a little insight as to what it's like living with an obsessive compulsive parent: My mother, noticing that the vacuum was out, started moving nearly every piece of furniture in the house. So long as the vacuum is out, why not vacuum the whole house, right? She then took the rugs from my bathroom and washed them. So long as the entire house is getting vacuumed, might as well do that too, right? After all of the floors were vacuumed, she mopped each of the tiled floors in the house. Then, she doused my bathroom in Comet and went about scrubbing hers, expecting me to do the same with mine. So long as the floors were getting cleaned, might as well do the rest, right? One thing always leads to another...and another and another and another, etc. etc. etc.!! It literally doesn't stop until A.) the entire house is clean to her standards or B.) everyone else in the house ditches her because they're tired of being worked to death.  >:(
   As if that weren't all bad enough, she'll literally run back & forth between whatever she's doing and whatever someone else is doing, just to make absolutely certain that they're doing it her way. And if they aren't, God help them.  :P
   Now you see why I was not able to get a shower until noon. And I still had some chores to do afterward.  >:(

ANYWAY, hair has been down all day. I ran Pantene Silkening crème through the length and let it air dry, but haven't even bothered to comb it. I've been meaning to measure this weekend, as it is mid-month, just to see how close I am to 25".

So this weekend brought something of a shopping spree for personal supplies. Friday evening, I bought 2 big bottles of Pantene Ice Shine S&C and another jar of the Pantene Nourishing hair mask. Today, I bought a 1L bottle of Evian - my favourite brand of water and I can use the bottle for future vinegar rinses. I also bought a huge bottle of distilled white vinegar for the purpose. After so much trial and error, I now know that these are the things that my hair likes best.

Life: In addition to giving my hair what it wants, I took some time (and money) to spoil myself in other areas as well. New bodywashes, makeup, lip balms, you name it. I was going all out. With my complexion as temperamental as it's been of late, I bought a lot of things labeled for sensitive skin. I read that my skin type can be very sensitive (which is true), so I'm now taking a gentler approach rather than fanning the flames. Hope it works.
   Has anyone seen the television commercials for the new 5 gum? Overrated, let me tell ya. That was one of the things that I bought this weekend. I have a penchant for trying the latest and greatest things - whatever's new on the market and looks somewhat appealing. Yes, it's a contrary notion to frugality and "saving for a rainy day," but I never got anything good out of being frugal. I'm a brand snob, I like trying new things and I've learned not to wait for whatever I want to go on sale because it's more likely to disappear before that happens. I'd rather pay full price for something than miss out on it entirely.
   What else...? I got a double CD of natural rain & thunder sounds. Well actually, one is rain and thunder and the other is rain and...birds and stuff. Sappy and new age as it may be, I kinda like listening to that sorta stuff. Especially while I'm going to sleep, as it seems to actually help me sleep better. If only I had a working CD player in my room...  :-/

*sigh* The drama continues. Gotta get running....I just don't feel like writing anymore.

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Tofurkey is blasphemy, IMO.

 
;D ;D


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Has anyone seen the television commercials for the new 5 gum? Overrated, let me tell ya.

Yep, I've tried it.  And yeah, it was just regular... not at all what I expected from all of that fancy packaging. ::)


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What else...? I got a double CD of natural rain & thunder sounds. Well actually, one is rain and thunder and the other is rain and...birds and stuff. Sappy and new age as it may be, I kinda like listening to that sorta stuff. Especially while I'm going to sleep, as it seems to actually help me sleep better.

I just got one of those too, from iTunes, the one I got is all rain. ;D  I usually like to listen to new age music as I sleep, but my husband hates it and refers to it as hippy music. :P  He doesn't mind the rain though, I like it too.  It's also great for meditation. ;)

La Diosa: hehe "hippie music"...like he would know, I guess?  ::)  Strangely enough, I never considered ambient CD's for meditation. Does it work well? And what is your method, if you don't mind my asking?

Hair: CWC. Ran out of Suave toasted vanilla & sugar conditioner. Huzzah! One bottle down. I love replacing old products with new.  :)  Soon I will have filtered out my Full & Thick shampoo and Restoratives conditioner and replaced them both with Ice Shine. That's my new favourite. And the Suave light conditioner has already been replaced with Daily Clarifying, which I'll probably start using on Wednesday. Hooray hair transformations...

Last night, I measured out of curiosity and found that my hair is right at 25". That might be my final measurement for October, or I might get one more ¼" before the 1st. hehehe I just realized that I'm slowly catching up to my Pantene sister, Maggie.  ;)  Granted, that won't last long, as I'm getting a trim in November.
   Two other things that I noticed: 1.) BSL actually falls at about 26" on me, so unfortunately, 2.) I won't be reaching BSL this year.  :'(  Hence, my ticker is gone. After my next trim, I'll decide if I can wait a year.

Other: My apologies for not reporting this sooner. My sister does not have cancer. Her procedure was a success.  :)  Thank you so much for all of your thoughts and prayers!
   Speaking of the little monster, I'm going to dinner tonight with her, her bf and a few of her friends. God willing, I'll have time to wash my face and work a little magic with my concealer stick.
   Complexion has been absolutely dreadful, and going to bed with makeup on last night certainly didn't help matters.  :P  Hopefully, the clay mask that I used this morning will. My dermatologist is ready to prescribe the intense meds that I was on in high school, and were I a rich woman, I'd take him up on that. *sigh* Alas...one more thing that will just have to wait.

Alright, enough babbling. There's work to be done.

Good to know that your sister doesn't have cancer, I'm sure that is such a relief to your entire family. :)

About a month ago I had to go on acne meds myself.  It's funny though because I never had acne until my late 20's, go figure. :P

When I meditate, I like to have soft music (instumental no lyrics) or ambient sounds in the background because I find it helps me relax.  I sit in the lotus position or I'll meditate on an inversion table.  I either focus entirely on my breaths or I'll try to clear my head of any thought, which is very difficult, or I'll do a mantra like love, patience or whatever I feel I need to work on at that time.  I don't use a timer, but somehow my average time works out to be about 10-15 minutes.  I do this most nights before bed, usually after 15 or 20 minutes of yoga.

Happy Dance!!!!!  Angel,that's is so fantastic that your sister does not have cancer!!!  Woo Hoo!!!!  You must feel such relief!!!!

Curlgirl64 wrote on Sep 18^th, 2007 at 2:21am:

Happy Dance!!!!!  Angel,that's is so fantastic that your sister does not have cancer!!!  Woo Hoo!!!!  You must feel such relief!!!!

I second that!

Lisabelle wrote on Sep 18^th, 2007 at 5:08am:

I second that!

Me three! I'm very happy to hear the good news.  :)

What a relief for your sister and your family!  I'm glad the outcome was so positive.

Wonderful news about your sister, Angel.   :)  Thank you, God!    [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]

Amen. It's a big relief...for everyone, I'm sure. We don't really talk about it - not out of deliberate avoidance or anything, but we don't see each other terribly often or for very long periods of time. So news is at the mercy of convenience.  :-/
   It is most certainly a relief for me, and I'm sure for my sister. I know my girl would persevere, come what may, but it's reassuring to know that such a thing won't be there to inhibit her in any way.

In other news, after missing my walk last night, I decided to make up for it this morning before I had to start getting ready for work. Ugh! I'll stick to nocturnal walks, thank you. Too <bleep> many people out during the day. But it was kind of nice to return home and be able to take a shower afterwards. I don't have that luxury at night because my parents are home and would freak if I took a shower at night, after having just taken one that morning. Lord forbid.  ::)

Anyway, I did a clarifying wash, customary for Tuesday mornings, with Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse (in my new 1L Evian bottle) and Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner. Only left the latter in for a few minutes before rinsing out this time. My hair doesn't seem to have suffered much for it.
   After that, just air dried as usual. No leave-in's. Then, combed and braided during my break.

One thing that's been a problem lately, that I've neglected to mention, is shedding. I almost always lose 2 - 3 hairs in the shower and more throughout the day, especially while combing. I don't know if it's stress or just a lot of hair follicles suddenly dying, but I wish that it would stop. I don't have much hair to lose!

On other fronts...I got an e-mail from Mr. Clueless the other day basically saying that he loved and missed me and was finding our sudden separation quite difficult. The usual nonsense. Completely out of character, I sent him a very brusque, or shall we say brutally honest, reply.  :-X  :-[  Nothing untrue or overly vicious, but I definitely got a most unsympathetic point across. Oh, I feel bad that the boy is suffering so, but the fact remains that it's his own fault. Call it a lesson in accountability.

Complexion is still a disaster and probably will be for another week or 2. Persistence in that area is key, even if it seems like a wasted effort. I'll do a peel off masque tonight, and try to keep the closet stocked with high necklines.

Work has been ridiculously busy, and I find myself becoming gradually more and more impatient with customers.  :-[  I have no idea how salespeople do it, really. Having to deal with hundreds of morons one-on-one every single day, patiently answering innumerable idiotic questions and explaining obvious concepts...  :P  It's bad enough having to do it over the phone. hehe I wish that I could be like the automated recording at my bank: "We're sorry that you seem to be having difficulty. Please try again later. Goodbye!"  ;D  I'm a "people person," can you tell?

Nails are still naked.  :-[  Even to the disappointment of my boss, who says that he likes coming through my office and seeing my "black" manicures.  ;D  For the record, they're only black maybe half the time.

Whoooa! A co-worker just brought me some German chocolate cake. Sweeeeet.  8-)

I loose a bunch of hair on wash days and when I detangle so don't feel too badly about your present shedding.

Glad you're sticking to your guns and not going back to Mr. Clueless.  [smiley=thumbup.gif]  (hmm, disembodied hand kinda creepy)

I also lose a bunch of hair when I wash, which is every 3 days or so.  Unless this is something new I wouldn't worry about it.  

Trisha: I wouldn't say that it's anything "new", as it has happened before, but it's definitely not typical. But I think that it's finally starting to go away, whatever the cause.

Juri: You kidding? What self-respecting woman would go back to a boy who treated her badly? And lol @ disembodied hand...they stole that from the trunk of my car.  ;)

Hair: The usual routine: CWC, Silkening crème, air dry. I forgot to bring a hairtie to work with me, so I'll just have to wait until I get home to braid. These days, haircare seems to follow the same pattern. It's rather boring, but seems to work ok. A week in the life of Angel's hair goes something like this:

Monday: CWC, Silkening crème on the length, air dry, braid. Sometimes do an overnight EVOO treatment
Tuesday: Clarify (clarifying wash, vinegar rinse, clarifying wash, condition), air dry - no leave-in's
Wednesday: CWC, Silkening crème on the length, air dry, braid
Thursday: same as Monday
Friday: WTC - wash all of hair, leave treatment conditioner on for an hour, condition - Silkening crème on the length, air dry, braid
Saturday: same as Wednesday
Sunday: same as Wednesday ~or~ W-CWC, Silkening crème, air dry, braid (depending on what time of day I get to have a shower)

Anyway, I washed both of my Creative seamless combs today. Also ran out of Full & Thick shampoo, Breakage Defense conditioner and my bodywash, so all kinds of empty bottles met the recycle bin today. I also got to break in the Suave Daily Clarifying light conditioner. It has a lovely fragrance that I've always rather liked and should complement my Pantene Ice Shine S&C nicely. They both seem to have a kind of clean, floral scent. Some kind of white flowers, I think. Either way, it's crisp and wintry with a sort of designer-y floral vibe. Should fit in with my designer perfumes no prob.  ;)
   It's kind of exciting. Tomorrow, I'll be an official Ice Shine convert.

Other Stuff: Work is still busy as heck. Power walking and abs are still happenin'. Peel off masque didn't happen last night, as I didn't get to bed until late, so it'll just have to wait until after my walk tonight. No big deal. Complexion is at last beginning to recover.

wrote on Sep 19^th, 2007 at 5:50pm:

Juri: You kidding? What self-respecting woman would go back to a boy who treated her badly? And lol @ disembodied hand...they stole that from the trunk of my car.  ;)

Unfortunately, I know two women, who otherwise have their acts together, do just that. One, after years of frequently breaking up/reconciling with the guy, finally came to her senses and dumped him for good. The other, married the jerk. (:P)  With those experiences in my mind, I was really glad you didn't fall into the same trap they did. Go Angel Spun! Woohoo!

lol, what else to you have in your trunk; Jimmy Hoffa?


edit: added a few words

Juri: Ahh, but the key term is self-respecting. A woman who allows herself to be taken advantage of in relationships isn't respecting or protecting herself. It sounds as if one of your friends has already figured that out. The other, well...I've been in her situation, and hopefully she'll wake up as well. Sometimes it takes falling into that trap to know how to avoid it in the future.


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lol, what else to you have in your trunk; Jimmy Hoffa?

hehehe A few bits and pieces, I'm sure.  ;)

Hair: CWC with Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner and Ice Shine S&C. No irritating burn on the back of my neck while I left the latter conditioner in. One difference that I've noticed between Pantene Restoratives and basic line conditioners is that the latter seems to coat my hair better and stay in after much rinsing. Restoratives conditioners will rinse out entirely, which leaves my hair want of moisture and protection. But the basic conditioners linger...perhaps they have a higher concentration of cones or just better conditioning agents. Whatever, it works.  :)
   Anyway, ran the Silkening crème through the length and air dried as usual. Combed during my break, but did not braid. SOP. But yeah, I'm officially an Ice Shine convert now and it's a very good thing.  :)

Other: Broke in a new bodywash today as well. Dial with spa minerals & exfoliating beads. Previously, I thought that I had sworn off Dial, but this was refreshing.
   Complexion is...bleh. Stagnant. Perhaps I shall hide under a paper bag for awhile. Or maybe a plastic one, tightly wrapped. heh heh  ::)  Absolutely loving my new St. Ives masques though. I hope that they never stop making those! Freeman can kiss my gritz.

So far, there haven't been any more annoying e-mails from Mr. Clueless. Maybe he got the point. hehe Sometimes, I like to imagine a Losers Anonymous meeting with all of my old flames gathered in a room, discussing how "beautiful" and "inspirational" I was, how empty their lives are without me and how much they all still "love" me. The Angel Dumped Me Club. lol Of course, each of them will have been tarred, feathered and dropped into the room by me. And they sit, empty and disheveled, still scraping off tar and spitting out feathers...and now Mr. Clueless is among them. The latest reject and the newest member.
   Aye, this Angel is somewhat notorious for her...erm, imagination.  ::)

However, I'm drawing a blank right now for what else to write about, so I guess I'll just stop. Cheers!

wrote on Sep 20^th, 2007 at 2:21pm:

Sometimes, I like to imagine a Losers Anonymous meeting with all of my old flames gathered in a room, discussing how "beautiful" and "inspirational" I was, how empty their lives are without me and how much they all still "love" me. The Angel Dumped Me Club.

LOL!!! I love it!!! ;D

Friday. Payday!  :D  Man, I honestly don't know where the last 2 weeks went. It doesn't seem like it's been that long since last payday, and here's another one.
   Actually, I have only a vague account of where the last 2 months have gone. I can remember some things, but they seem kind of scattered and blurry now, almost blending in with the rest of the year that has flown by. It's not that I'm complaining - I wanted the last 2 months to be over and done with. Especially August and the beginning of this month. And now they are, and...I don't know. I'm rambling.  :-X

Nevertheless, it's Friday. That means the usual WTC. I did a heavy EVOO treatment last night and washed it out with Ice Shine shampoo this morning. Man, that clear formula works wonders. How could I use anything else?
   Left Pantene Fortifying treatment in under a shower cap for an hour while I did laundry, etc. Then rinsed and conditioned with Ice Shine conditioner. I noticed how much softer my hair was as it was air drying. I kept running my fingers through it and separating the damp strands while driving to work. Well not actually while driving, really. But at stoplights and such.

Anyway, as I was rinsing out my treatment, I also exfoliated my hands and elbows with a homemade sugar/salt scrub. My nails are also sporting a nice new coat of pewter polish, which seemed to please my boss.  ::)

As of now, my hair is dry and braided. I'm waiting for 5:00 to roll around so I may start the weekend. There may be another junk food strike in the near future, since the scale has been showing me numbers that I'm not at all comfortable with. Peace out.

wrote on Sep 20^th, 2007 at 2:21pm:

Juri: Ahh, but the key term is self-respecting. A woman who allows herself to be taken advantage of in relationships isn't respecting or protecting herself.

Too true, too true. I'm quite happy about the one gal, but the other *sigh*. Unfortunately she's the type who needs a guy in her life to feel complete and the ones she ends up with are only interested in her body/showing her off as a trophy. >:( (angry face for both the guys and her for not allowing herself to date a guy who respects her)


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hehehe A few bits and pieces, I'm sure.  ;)

Well, that's one thing I can check off on my "Mysteries to Solve Before I Die" list! I guess now I can look into whether or not Mothman is actually the lovechild of Nessie and Bigfoot.  :D

Juri: Yeah...unfortunately, until your friend learns to respect herself, no one else is going to respect her.
   And the last time I had Bigfoot over for tea, he claimed no knowledge whatever of the Mothman, so the sleuthing there is yours.  ;)

Hair: 3rd day CWC hair. The usual routine. Tomorrow should be a clarifying day, so I'll do a heavy EVOO treatment tonight. Blegh. I still have a...erm, blemish...on my earlobe from the last overnight EVOO treatment.  >:(  Yes, I'm beginning to think of oiling in general as a very bad thing. It both contradicts and counteracts my efforts to lead the most oil-free life possible (within reasonable means)...so I really can't get rid of my EVOO soon enough.
   Trashed the purple shower cap that I'd been using for the past however many months as it was letting lots of water in. I wrote a little reminder on my hand to put a new one in the shower tonight.

Other: I am totally put together today. Don't ask me how I did it, but I managed to get everything done that needed to be this morning. Whoa...

Juke box heroooo
Got stars in his eeeeyes...
*rawk & roll moment*

:-[  Darnit, Angel, how many times must you attempt to type with the radio on?
   So, right, my look is decidedly casual today but very put together. I even tried out the pewter coloured Urban Decay eyeshadow that I bought. It's...ok. I won't waste so much of my hard-earned $$ on eyeshadow next time, sheesh! The designer stuff isn't really any better. Can't say that I'm any more impressed with the mascara that I just bought either. It was both recommended and tried out of curiosity, but ugh! Volumizing mascaras are no good on me...I end up looking like a tarantula. lol I might let my sister try it, if she doesn't mind sharing my eye cooties. hehe
   Anyway, it's after 5:00, so I'm going to find my security code and scram. Wonder which CD's I'll rawk out to on the way home....

Peace.

wrote on Sep 24^th, 2007 at 8:11pm:

[color=#000000]Juri: Yeah...unfortunately, until your friend learns to respect herself, no one else is going to respect her.

Ugh, amen to that. :P


Quote:

And the last time I had Bigfoot over for tea, he claimed no knowledge whatever of the Mothman, so the sleuthing there is yours.  ;)

Well, there goes that theory. Guess I'll have to talk to El Chupacabra next. *sigh* I need to get out more...and possibly stop visiting cryptozoology sites.

Quote:

I end up looking like a tarantula. lol

*SNORT*   ;D

Tuesday. Clarifying day. After an overnight heavy EVOO treatment, no less. Everything has gone according to plan for once. I washed a load of laundry this morning (still haven't dried it - waiting for the dryer to be free) including all of my satin pillowcases. And I got to use my new yellow shower cap this morning. In the process, I realized just how loose and enormous the old one was. Egad.

Looking back at my previous journal, I was surprised at what I was learning at this time last year: I liked Pantene Ice Shine S&C better than Restoratives Breakage Defense! Why? Because of 1. cost and 2. chemical burn. Huh! Same reasons as this year! Why is it that so many of life's little lessons are just reaffirmations of things we already know?  ::)  Maybe I should just freaking stick with something already!

On a personal front, I've been talking (just casually) with a fellow who was vying for my affections last year. Though I don't see any real potential there, he is a co-worker of my sister's, so I certainly cannot avoid him. I'm comfortable maintaining a friendly aquaintancsehip with him without doing anything to inadvertently encourage his feelings.

So yeah, watching the beginning of The Biggest Loser has motivated me a bit...I'm going to get ready for my walk.  ::)

Quote:

Why is it that so many of life's little lessons are just reaffirmations of things we already know?

Because you're getting older and more forgetful?  --Oh wait, no; that's me.  ;D

Oh, Trish, you're so not alone there! I can't even remember what socks I was wearing yesterday - and I own 9 pairs of the same durn socks!  ::)  Of course, I am closing in on 30.  :o

#$&%!!! I just accidentally kicked over a full bottle of white tea on the floor of my room.  >:(

Anyway, sister's co-worker invited me out tonight, but it didn't happen...and it isn't going to. I care for the guy, but I'm standing by my original statement: I don't want to lead him on. His interest in me is flattering, though. Can't deny that.  ::)

Recently, I've noticed that I'm not quite as over Mr. Clueless as I'd previously thought. Well...I'm definitely over all of the bs that went along with him, but little things still remind me of him. That part sucks. Last night, I turned on the radio and Phantom Limb by The Shins was playing. And rather than changing the station, I just sat there and listened, crying like a sissy. Mr. Clueless loved The Shins and quoted that song all the time.  :(  *sigh* Perhaps these are just the final throes.

So...tonight was the Blaqk Audio show, and needless to say, I was unable to attend.  :'(  That's what has me down more than anything else. I really wanted to see them. It might sound ridiculous, but it's somewhat comforting to know that my 2 favourite guys in the universe are right here in town, just 30 miles or so from where I'm sitting right now. heh That's closer than Mr. Clueless ever got to me. *snarky grin*
   In all seriousness, I hope that tonight's show is the best they've ever played and that that will inspire them to come back again very soon.

As for hair, today was the usual routine. Had to refresh my braid before I ran out to the coast to write. Probably won't bother doing anything else with it until it's time to take it down for bed. Speaking of which, I should wash up and head that way. Tomorrow, I'll see if my skin will behave enough for makeup, although the whole tarantula eye look will have to go. Bad enough that my hair is like webs. With any luck, I'll come out looking more like me this time and less like the cosmetic spawn of Ziggy Stardust, Davey Havok and all the members of KISS combined.

Hair: Same old routine. CWC with Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner and Pantene Ice Shine S&C. The latter conditioner I leave in under my new shower cap while finishing everything else, then rinse out at the end. After squeezing the excess water out of my hair with my microfiber towel, I run Pantene Silkening crème through the length and just let it air dry. When it is totally dry, I detangle with a seamless cellulose comb and put it all back in a braid. That's how it stays most every day, and that's been the routine for the past several months. The Silkening crème makes my hair feel a bit "gummy", so I don't think I'll be buying it again.

Other Stuff: Craving junk food like a fiend now, and I still have 3 days to go before the strike is over.  :(  My body might appreciate it in coming weeks, but my sweet tooth is writhing in agonized withdrawal. I try to appease it with açai bowls from Robeks.  ;)
   Sister's co-worker asked me out again today, so I had to let him have it...and rattled off a few of the countless reasons why the relationship that he longs for with me will never happen. He was bummed, but seemed to understand. We will remain friendly acquaintances.  :)
   My entire office is buzzing with the usual "month end" talk - another thing that has me psyched for October. On the 1st, I can once again begin consuming mass amounts of all things unhealthy...although I will try not to go too crazy. With the holidays approaching, I will certainly have my fair share.  :o
   Right now, I'm still 11 lbs. overweight. Not a frightening amount, but not flattering either! I'd like to see just how much of that I can melt away before it gets too cold to power walk. For now, those nocturnal walks are still happening every other night...and to be completely honest, I kind of miss doing them every night! Still doing ab exercises every other night as well, and next month I'll start working on my arms. God, let me be in great shape for my 10 year class reunion!

Friday Hair: The usual WTC. Washed entire length with Ice Shine shampoo, left Pantene Fortifying treatment on under a shower cap for over an hour, then rinsed and conditioned with Ice Shine conditioner. The rest as usual, although I haven't had a chance to so much as detangle because someone forgot to give me my 3:00 break!  >:(

Have Mercy: Stayed up until 2am IM-ing my new acquaintance/sister's co-worker. I swear, this man is temptation personified! He has so many enticing qualities, but also the few that ruin the whole picture. He's aware that I don't reciprocate his feelings, but he is determined not to give up on me. Why is it that men can never take no for an answer?  ::)  In any case, I am trying not to let him break down my defenses too much.

Bon Week-end? What sort of adventures await me this time? Dangerous liasons? Forbidden affairs? Tests of virtue? We shall see...

Lead me not into temptation
Heaven help me to be strong
I can fight all that I'm feelin'
But I can't do it alone
Help me break this spell that I'm under
Guide my feet and hold me tight
I need ten thousand angels
Watchin' over me tonight
                -Mindy McCreedy, Ten Thousand Angels

Hair: Had to wait until mid-afternoon for a shower yesterday, so I had to do a W-CWC. Today was just a regular ol' CWC, thank goodness. Silkening crème, air dry, yada yada. Yesterday, I wore my hair down with just a sleek side part (my hair parts naturally this way) and went out to grab a bite for dinner and do a little necessary shopping. My hair held this style nicely until I had to braid it for my night walk. There were a few short pieces sticking up, but a wee bit of Pantene flex-hold hairspray took care of that. Yes, I do use a teensy amount of hairspray on occasion.  :-[  But my hair doesn't seem to suffer for it.
   Today, I left my hair down while dancing in my room - I like to leave my hair down while I dance. It's sort of an extension of the attitude and expression that I'm putting out there. Just kinda compliments the feeling, I guess. The problem is that it tangles mercilessly in the process and working that out is not fun! But it's neat and braided now.

Love? The late-night conversations with my new friend (yes, friend...I'll go that far) continue. We actually text each other all the bloody time now, and I'm not minding that a bit. Last night, we both ended up falling asleep in the middle of the conversation (it was late and we were both really tired!). LOL! And this morning, we just picked up right where we'd left off.
   The urge to see this cat in person is slowly building. Right now, we're pretty much friends from a distance, and I am on the fence about whether I want it to go much further than that. On one hand, I know that I could learn a great deal from this person...for clarity's sake, I'll refer to him as "K". On the other hand, there is one more thing that I must be absolutely certain of before my apprehension dissolves completely. But I'm finding his tenacity, determination and extreme fondness for me to be less and less of a bad thing. God help me, this man is winning me over!  :o

Last night, I went out to grab a bite for dinner and do a little necessary shopping in the same shopping center that K works in. It was nerve-racking being in his vicinity - I believe the last time that I was that close to him was well over a year ago. And even then, I didn't notice him. But between the recent progress of our relationship and my own social/romantic anxiety, I was freaking out just being across the parking lot from where he works. I'm pathetic.  ::)  Lord help me when we actually do get together in person (yes, when, not if).

Life: Mr. Clueless seems to be completely over me. Granted, that's easy to do when you're not committed in the first place, but it still burns me to see even more girls posting messages all over his MySpace. One of which was an ex-gf whom he claimed that he was no longer speaking to. Another lie exposed? Whatever. I need to just stop going there. I feel an "I hate men" rant coming on, so I'll change the subject now!  >:(
   In a few minutes, I'll likely receive another text informing me that K is off of work and interested in getting together. *gulp* Give me strength...

snif snif....I think I smell a possible beautiful trusting relationship in the future about to unfold!!!! :)

So is K and your sister's co-worker the one and same guy?  Or are we talking 2 temptations here?   :)

Curlgirl: We'll see. *crosses fingers*  ;)

Trisha: Yes, K is my sister's co-worker.

Hair: CWC. Blah. The usual routine. It's braided and I'll leave it that way until bedtime.
   K got a trim this afternoon, which spurned a small conversation about hair.  :)  I got to tell him a little bit about my dye disaster 7 years ago and having to grow from scratch. He told me that he loves long hair  :D  and I assured him that mine would be waist length again. It's funny how we seem to be compatible in so many little ways.

Life: Work is pretty heavy today. Many tasks to address, but they're all pretty minor.
   K and I are planning to actually get together on Wednesday or Thursday. Eeeeep! My nerves at this stage are off the charts. As much as I adore this man, I am terribly intimidated by him. Not by his personality or anything, but by his age and the level of experience that goes with it. He is 8 years my senior and I daresay even more immersed in the gothic world than I am. I have always respected my elders for their knowledge and wordly experience...their "status", if you will, so I worry about coming across as ignorant or immature.  :-[
   For as anxious as I am to pursue this, there is an equal amount of apprehension. There's the intimidation that I mentioned and also a major uncertainty about whether such a partnership will even be possible. On one hand, there's a lot of hope...on the other, there's doubt and suspicion. I'm on the fence. So we'll see what happens. God help us.

So, that's it for now. Peace.

Sounds like the 8 years is going to be good for both of you!  It sounds like this man is just what you need,in the goth world and in general.  It's exciting!!!  Keep us posted!

Curlgirl: It could be quite beneficial, yes. I may be able to learn a lot from this man. Already, he has been helping me familiarize myself with his taste in electronic music. Just the tip of the iceberg...
   On the other hand, the differences in age and personality could be disastrous. At this point, I am not sure whether I am his only interest...and if I'm going to devote myself to someone, they had better do the same in return. That's all I'm going to say.

Hair: Clarified today as usual. Didn't do a heavy EVOO treatment last night because it was late and I just didn't feel like dealing with oil.  :P  As of now, my hair is braided as usual.
   As far as the generic multivitamins that I've been taking go, this is my 3rd month taking them and I haven't noticed any difference in hair growth. The results have been the same as with vitamin E, which leads me to believe that growth is more seasonal than nutritional.

Life: Egad. It seems as though K and I will be getting together both tomorrow and Thursday! *gulp* I've been panicking about everything from ideas for times and places (I'd rather leave that up to him, if possible!) to what to wear to how to do my hair to what we'll talk about. The whole concept of dating scares me to death. I'd really rather run away screaming and hide until it's over (socially impared  ;D), but then nothing would happen. Since I can't back out now, I'll just have to see what the outcome of all of this is. Pray for me!!  :o
   Still exercising. Power walked yesterday, worked my abs this morning, would like to work a little bit with my free weight tonight. Scale this morning said 6.2 lbs. overweight...better than 10, I guess. It's going to fluctuate, but as long as the numbers keep going down, it's a good thing. K says that he loves me just the way I am...but he's not seen me in person for about 2 years!  :P  That's going to change. It's all going to change - new beginnings is the whole theme of this year.
   Well, it's quitting time here, so I'm off to rush home and get my nails in gothly good shape for tomorrow.

I say go for it with this guy.  I understand your feelings of intimidation however, they could be totally unfounded.  This could turn out to be a great learning experience regardless of the out come.  Perhaps he can teach you a few things, but I feel that putting yourself in differnt situations can be a great way to learn a bit more about yoursef as well, you may be surprised. ;)  I think you should let go of all of your hang ups and just try to enjoy yourself tomorrow. :)

BREATHE!!!  Now is not the time to panic.   ;)  The two of you are simply going out to have a good time, not walking down the aisle of a wedding chapel.  And remember:  HE must work to impress YOU.  It is he who must work to deserve your trust and admiration, and not the other way around.  Just enjoy yourself and never doubt your worth.  *hugs*  

LD: Absolutely agree about the learning experience angle. As for the intimidation, it's definitely not unfounded, but K does a fabulous job of relating to me so I feel a lot less worried. I never imagined that we'd have so much in common.

Trisha: Breathe, yes...must remember to do that once in awhile.  ::)

Quote:

The two of you are simply going out to have a good time, not walking down the aisle of a wedding chapel.

:o  Girl, don't even make me think about that!! lol This is scary enough.

Hair: The typical early morning CWC routine. Silkening crème on the length, but no braid today. I've decided that I want to wear my hair down and parted on the side when I go to meet K today. He's never seen me with my hair down, and since he loves long hair...  ;)
   Still haven't had time to measure yet. Ok, that's partially true. Mostly, it just slipped my mind. I claim distractions...  :P

Life: Didn't get around to the free weight last night. But this morning, the scale told me that I am now only 5.4 lbs. overweight. So close now...

Oh Lord: So here we go. 2 more hours before I have to race home and get "fixed up". Nothing overboard, just put together. My nails have a fresh, new coat of black and my makeup will be rather light, as K is fond of the natural look. I already have my outfit and hairstyle planned...now it's just a matter of putting it all in place.
   God, I am so nervous. Everyone including K is telling me not to be (which is ironic, considering he has the same social anxiety and is just as nervous as I am). I've been fluctuating between feeling alright with it and being nervous enough to toss my cookies.  :P  But it's down to the wire now. No backing out. I'll let all of you know how it goes...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand???  --how did it go?!?

Wowie Wow: Alright. I went to meet K at Starbucks about an hour before he had to leave for work last night. We sat outside in the night air, away from people, and talked over chai tea. I have met very few men in my life as mature, humble and good-natured as K. He was a total gentleman.
   One bizarre thing about our relationship is how naturally we seem to get along - especially after meeting only once. He has a remarkable ability to make the 8 years in age, experience and upbringing seem like practically nothing. And it's a pretty big deal when someone whom I should revere and feel terribly humbled by can make me comfortable in his presence. The more we talk, the more we learn that we have in common...enough to be very close blood relatives. Strange.
   Anyway, after very subtly hinting that the time had come for him to get going, we walked back to his car, where he gave me a beautiful champagne rose, so pale that I thought it white at first. We waved to each other from our cars as we parted ways and drove different directions into the night. I'm pretty sure that I still have some leftover adrenaline from it all even now...and I am far less nervous about tonight.  :)

Hair: Today was the usual CWC, Silkening crème, air dry routine. I'll braid it when I get a break here as usual. Tonight, I will attempt a romantic updo...probably the double buns with black roses. I wish I had a camera so I could show everyone!

Life: AAAAAAARGH! Work is nuts.  :P  I seldom have so many projects - small to enormous - going on at once. I had to take a break from it all before it drove me crazy...crazier.
   So tonight is the big night. K is coming to pick me up for dinner and then a nocturnal walk through Balboa Park. Sounds nice...though I hope that I don't stutter too much. Or worse. My family is cursed with the hilarious and humiliating inability to speak properly at all times, where we'll try to say something and it comes out as dyslexic gibberish.  :-[  I hope that doesn't happen tonight...or around K ever! lol
   Only 2 more hours before I have to rush home and transform myself from plain Jane to goth goddess once again. Wish me luck!  ;)

Yippee!!  I'm so glad the first meeting went so well. I'm sure dinner will go just as well. It sounds like K is trying very hard to make you feel comfortable around him.  Just relax and enjoy is company - everything else will fall into place if it is meant to be.

I hope tonight is everything you want it to be and more.  *hugs*  Have fun, sweetie!   :)

Trisha: It was. I did.  ;)  *hugz*

BB:
Quote:

Just relax and enjoy is company - everything else will fall into place if it is meant to be.

Quite true. Although, I do worry about what will happen if it's not meant to be.  :-/

Hair: Last night, it went up in 2 "cinnabuns" - one above and one below. This has become my usual updo because it's elegant and easy and I can do it in about 5 seconds. No black rose barrettes this time, though...dangit. Once it was all pinned into place, I slicked down any random pieces that were sticking out with a little flex-hold hairspray.
   When I came home at the end of the night, I just took the pins out and finger combed a little bit before falling into bed.
   This morning, I detangled as much as I could either with my fingers or a seamless comb before doing a WTCC. Washed all of my hair with Pantene Ice Shine shampoo, then left the Fortifying treatment in for well over an hour - my hair needed it. After rinsing it out, I conditioned with Ice Shine conditioner and then Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner. The rest of my routine was as normal. It's safely braided now and recovered from last night.

The Date: Yes, my first one in God knows how long. Believe me, I freaked out while getting ready, consulting my sister on almost every little detail. My nerves were frayed, but I did end up getting entirely put together by the time K arrived. He had dressed up a little as well, and handed me a dozen long stemmed red roses when I greeted him at the door.  :D  He had also brought a huge white floral arrangement for my mother, which he had gotten from work the night before. And he said hello to my sister when he brought it in.
   A few seconds later, we jetted off downtown and had dinner at a cute little restaurant near the area where I used to live (most of you remember the apartment that I shared with my ex-bf). Dinner was good, as was the company.  ;)
   Afterwards, we walked through Balboa Park in the dead of night. Dark trails through SoCal valley wilderness...no other people around...fun. K had a vague remembrance of the place, which helped. While we were there, he took off a cluster of black beaded bracelets that he'd been wearing and gave them to me. I guess he thinks that I don't wear enough jewelry or something. lol
   Anyway, we made it back to my house at about 2 am (my family was asleep) and he came in quietly, carrying the last of his gifts - a case of votive candles from his work - to my room. Very generous guy, this K.  ;)  Then he left, but texted me when he got home to say goodnight.
   I know the question on everybody's mind: Was there a kiss? *giggle* Yes there was. That's all I'm going to say.  :o  :-X  :-[  ;)

In any case, a great night followed with a payday today.  :D  A great new guy and money...what could be better?

Sounds like you had a great time last night, Angel Spun! :D Thanks for sharing the details of your date.

lol, I guess we can live vicariously through each other: you with BPAL and me with dates. ;D

it sounds like you had a heck of a time, big sis. Congrats! (also, I hate to do this... but... "d'awwwwww"(you're not the only friend i've d'awwed this week, don't feel bad) )  He sounds like quite a generous gentleman... I hope this one works out for you!


(and btw, when Paul came up to visit me in missouri, the very first time we'd ever met in person, I hid under a table in a closet for half an hour out of sheer nerves...)

Kisses and roses?!  Lucky gal.  :D

Yay!!!  I'm very excited for you!!   8-)

yeah, angel! sounds like a great date.

Juri: hehehe If you want to have vicarious dates, you'd better go after bigger fish than me! I so rarely have them. Thursday's was my first in about 2 years.  :o

Kiraela: Thanx, little sis. Btw, what's a..."d'awww?" lol I confess I'm a bit of a dinosaur when it comes to modern, erm, terminology...  :-?

Novusfemina: Kisses, roses, luck...all in abundance it seems. I'll count my blessings, believe me!

Trish: hehe Thanx, amiga. I'm pretty excited too, although not without apprehension.

RTG: All in all, it was.  :)

However: One thing that I neglected to mention was that during Thursday's date, I learned that K smokes.  >:(  :(  Those of you that know me or have read my hair journal from last year are well aware of my stance against chemical dependencies of any sort. You may also remember that my last boyfriend smoked, drank and used drugs - all of which caused a multitude of problems within our relationship and ultimately led to its demise. So does anyone think that I would willingly place myself anywhere near that same situation again? Hardly.  :P
   K says that he is determined to quit and has asked me to believe in him.  ::)  Poor man must really think that I was born yesterday.

Some Other Disgusting Stuff: My feet seem to be in terrible shape lately. Again, I have been reminded that synthetic socks are a horrible idea, as part of Saturday morning was spent pulling a hamster-sized amount of dead skin from between my toes.  :P  Naturally, I made haste in replacing all of the aforementioned synthetic socks with new ones that actually permit my feet to breathe, and have begun a ritual of powdering my feet in the morning to dry them out. Might try using Neosporin on the cracked and jagged areas overnight. Just dreadful, though. So pedicures aren't happening for awhile.

Hair: The usual routine today. CWC, Silkening crème (I swear, I am going to be using that stuff forever because it never seems to run low!), air dry, braid. Same over the weekend, although on Saturday, I had to do a W-CWC.
   The ends of my hair are at least 4 years old now. Probably closer to 5. Which means that I still have hair attached from all the way back in 2002! That was even before my divorce, so I can only imagine the many stresses that my poor hair is still carrying with it...and the damage that resulted from it. With this in mind, it really is no wonder that the bottom half of my hair is quite damaged while the top half seems relatively healthy. As the years go by, I try to take better and better care of my hair, lessening the impact, reducing its exposure and using better products.
   The most beneficial thing that I have adopted this year, I would have to say, has been the CWC's. When I first started doing them, I immediately noticed that my hair felt much softer and smoother as a whole, as opposed to when I was washing the entire length every single day. The ends seem a little less dried out than they were before, but I know that it will take a lot of growing before I can truly realize the benefits of this new method. Damage and moisture loss from 2002 can never be restored. But I am going to keep taking the best care possible as my hair grows out. That's been the plan since I first started growing it again.

More Chaos: Once again, my father has been bitten by the remodeling bug. It seems that our office is moving into our sunroom while what is now the office is going to be a guest room. So dad's been doing what he does - painting, measuring and buying furniture like a madman.  ;D  What this means for me is replacing the enormous chest of drawers and nightstand in my bedchamber with a dresser and mirror in the same style. Probably an equal amount of drawers in a more compact piece of furniture.
   This means that I won't need to get a placemat to match the bedding in my chamber...just a nice runner for the new dresser.
   But for right now, everything is awry, furniture is out of place and dust and the smell of paint hover in the air. Should look nice once the holidays roll around, though.  8-)

"Some Other Disgusting Stuff: My feet seem to be in terrible shape lately. Again, I have been reminded that synthetic socks are a horrible idea, as part of Saturday morning was spent pulling a hamster-sized amount of dead skin from between my toes.    Naturally, I made haste in replacing all of the aforementioned synthetic socks with new ones that actually permit my feet to breathe, and have begun a ritual of powdering my feet in the morning to dry them out. Might try using Neosporin on the cracked and jagged areas overnight. Just dreadful, though. So pedicures aren't happening for awhile."

Oh honey that sounds like athlete's foot to me. :(  Tinactin is really good for that.  One thing that good is to go shoeless whenever possaible. Powdering your feet is great as well.  ((((hugs)))

I agree with Lisabelle.  I have little, squished together toes (you know how some people can spread their toes like they spread their fingers?  Not me!) so athlete's foot is something I battle constantly!  All of them (Tinactin, Lamisil, and oh shoot, what's the other one?) are pretty good.  Just remember to follow the directions.  Breathable socks are good.  Changing your socks during the day also helps.  Also rotate your shoes so you don't wear the same pair two days in a row.  

wrote on Oct 8^th, 2007 at 7:44pm:

Juri: hehehe If you want to have vicarious dates, you'd better go after bigger fish than me! I so rarely have them. Thursday's was my first in about 2 years.  :o

Well, my first and so far last date was over 5 years ago, so you're doing a lot better than me! *simultaneous lol and sob*

Agreeing with the breathable socks. I haven't gotten athlete's foot, but I can feel a difference in how "happy" my feet feel when I wear cotton socks v. synthetic ones.

Poor toesies!  Yeah, what everyone said... cotton socks and even better, open toed shoes whenever possible.. there's a reason chinese people wear sandals in all sorts of weather

a "d'awwww" is when you see something so cute that you basically go " awwwww" with a slight giggle... in real time it sounds vaguely like"*ch'aww'hawwww..." *possibly one of those things you'd have to hear... much like gaelic, it's bloody difficult to pronounce from text alone*

cotton socks rule... Then again, I dislike most artificial fibers... Cotton, wool, silk, linen ect. for me!

Kiraela: Ohhh, ok. I get it. See? Old dogs can learn new tricks with proper training.  ;)  And I know what you mean about Gaelic - oy! More consonants per word than freaking German, and yet the language is so much easier than it looks.

Juri: *hugs* You poor thing. I wish I could offer you some tips, but I'm really not much better off than you are. It's all the luck of the draw, I guess.  :P  I met my last boyfriend at a Halloween party, and K first spotted me when I went into my sister's work.

As For The Feet: They seem to be doing a little bit better. It's not athlete's foot - just a troublesome skin irritation (like an allergy) that I've gotten a few times before. I've been attentive with it, but it might not disappear for a week or so.  >:(  Amen to the natural fibers. I'll never buy synthetic socks again, no matter how cushy and tempting they look.

And For The Hair: Clarifying day! Washed with Pantene Purity shampoo, then did a vinegar rinse, then another wash with Purity shampoo. Conditioned once with Pantene Ice Shine conditioner, then with Suave Daily Clarifying conditioner...just because I felt like it.
   Walked into my chamber to find the scruffy cat that lives with us curled up on my bed and sleeping on my microfiber hair towel!  >:(  Must remember to close my door all the way in the future.
   Hair is soft but lax and vulnerable, so I can't wait to get it into a braid.

And For The New...erm, Romance? K and I are getting together again tomorrow. After almost a week since our last/first date, we're dying to see each other again. Yeah, the guy smokes, but as Trisha said, it's not like I'm walking down the aisle or anything yet! In all other respects, I do like him, so right now I think I'll just relax and see where it leads.  ;)