So I've been a member here for about a month, and I figured that now was the time to create my own little hair journal. I've never done this before, so please bear with me.

Now, what to write...  ???

This morning, I woke up, did the dishes and 2 loads of laundry, and straightened up the bedroom all before settling down for a pre-shower scalp massage.

The evil roommate was still asleep in his chamber of filth, and I figured that he would stay that way for sometime yet, considering how late he was up last night. Just like every other night.
 His door was not completely closed, and I caught brief glimpses of him through the crack between it and the wall each time I passed by. Though he had moved almost every time, he was indeed still unconscious. The bum!

My stereo is on the wall that separates our rooms, so I turned on my music low so as not to wake him.

I usually play some type of classical music while I do scalp massages. Nocturnal piano, opera, aria...it just seems to work best for the purpose.

The 6th track (Pachelbel's "Canon in D") was not yet over by the time I'd finished. Then, it was off to the shower.

The roommate was still sound asleep.

Earlier this morning, I mixed up a vinegar rinse in one of the many empty water bottles laying around. Today, I decided, would be a clarifying day.

I used Pantene Purity shampoo for the first wash, following with the vinegar rinse (I use distilled white vinegar instead of ACV). After rinsing this out with cold water, I went onto the second wash with the usual Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal 2 in 1. Rinsed this out, applied the corresponding conditioner and covered my head with a shower cap while attending to my other "shower duties." Finish with a final cold rinse, and voilà. This is my usual clarifying routine.

I had about 15 minutes to dress before flying out the door to work. As I was lacing up my boots, guess who finally woke up (this was just after noon)?  ;D
 "The dæmon rises," I muttered to myself.

He had seated himself at the computer as I rushed about the apartment gathering my things. As per usual, I left without a word to him. He and I almost never speak...and it's better that way.

The place was dark and empty when I came home. This was a source of both confusion and relief.

My boyfriend's truck was in one of the spaces in front of our complex, and yet no sign of him or his dæmon cousin. Perhaps they went somewhere together. Perhaps not. 'Tis no major concern of mine.

Fresh popcorn from my air popper was dinner. Tonight, I'll do an overnight treatment.

Have fun with your hair journal  :)

And I guess, we can read more about Daemon cousin /roommate.......... ;)

Congrats on starting your own journal!  ;D

Thank you kindly for the congrats.  :)  The drama continues...

Went to bed late last night, woke up an hour late this morning. I suppose I should count my blessings that I still got a shower. Was able to wash the overnight treatment out.

The water in our apartment has been acting funky lately. The temperature seems to fluctuate dramatically all on its own...but only in the shower. Sometimes I suspect the dæmon...he likes to run hot water in the kitchen sink while I'm in the shower, so my water turns cold. He doesn't realize that he's actually doing me (and my hair) a favour. hehehe *evil grin*
   But still, it's quite awkward trying to adjust the temperature with the hot and cold knobs in the shower. Trying to find the ideal comfortable temperature for hair and body separately, and alternating between the two.  :-/

This afternoon, I caught my reflection in the window of my car and was happy to see my hair as it blew in the wind. The length is definitely making some progress now.

On the subject of my poor car, it is in desperate need of oil. heh Much like my hair, I guess.
   Saturday night, I drove up to Disneyland on a dry engine, and probably bbq-ed it in the process! But my annual pass expired on Sunday, so what choice did I have, really?  ;D

I'm still stuck in limbo between Pantene & Herbal Essences. I just can't decide!
   There are pros and cons to both, so I suppose I'll just have to give Herbal Essences a fair month and see how it goes. Although if it eats the skin on my neck again, it won't last that long. I don't want to jinx it, though. Let's just see what happens.

The dæmon was supposed to move out at the end of this month. But to my utter dismay, that isn't going to happen. *sigh*
   I can't wait to get out of this dump. My boyfriend & I are both sick of the inner city and all of the ghetto trash that goes with it. He wants to move someplace "nice" and upscale because we're both moving up financially.
   I would be content with a cheap place in East County, where I originally hail from, but he won't hear of it. "Nothing less than $800 a month," he says. Indeed, he has a point. He grew up penniless in the city and won't settle for less now that he has money of his own. My champagne taste seems to be rubbing off on him.  ;)
   Guess we'll see what happens there as well.

Well, I should run to the bank if I'm ever going to get that case of oil. When I return, I'll probably put on one of my Sarah Brightman cd's and do a scalp massage. Maybe I'll sit for awhile and just smell my bottles of Herbal Essences.  ;)

So today I used my boyfriend's Herbal Essences Fruit Fusions S&C. The hydrating formula. And ended up with a nasty chemical burn.  :(

I did a conditioning treatment in between. Pantene's Intensive Restoration Treatment, left in for an hour, then rinsed with cool water.

I found out that my eeevil ex (who happens to live, for whatever reason, with my immediate family-ugh!) will not be flying to Phoenix for Thanksgiving as planned. So he'll be spending the entire day with my family...instead of me.  :-/
   I had made arrangements to go over to their place tonight to make pumpkin pies for tomorrow, and to have Thanksgiving dinner with them. These plans fell through, naturally, when I learned that he would be there. Yes, it's very messed up.

I also am rather not planning on spending Thanksgiving breakfast with my boyfriend at his father's place...even though said "place" is conveniently right next door. I'm not going because 1.) All of them smoke, as well as indulge in many other toxic behaviours  2.) The dæmon cousin/roommate will be there. He already makes daily life quite intolerable for me...why let him ruin my holidays too? And  3.) I would feel awkward, uncomfortable and just generally out of place as ever.

So I've agreed to spend it with the only other family that I have here in SoCal, which would be my aunt, my uncle (who is just recovering from a surgery this morn) and their 3 children.

My boyfriend is a sore subject these days. Not only is he rough and heavy-handed with my hair  >:( but he's leaving tomorrow night to spend the next 4 days on a camping trip with his equally toxic guy friends.
   Of course, that leaves me alone for the next 4 days with guess who?

My father's words echo louder every day: "He doesn't have much regard for you."

On Friday, I plan on having dinner at a co-worker's house upon her invitation. She & I have bonded nicely at the office, so this is naturally the next step. So there is a silver lining...

As to my hair, I bought my own bottles of Herbal Essences (the original line) just to try and see what happens. I'll try not to judge until both bottles are empty.

This week's Santa Ana weather has not been kind to my hair or skin. Both are horridly dried out, so I'll need some rehabilitative work. Oh well.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!  ;D

It had to happen...

Yesterday I woke up sick. Merely sinus drainage at first, but as the day progressed, so did my illness. Now it's a full-on cold.
   I've been staying responsible about it, of course: Sleeping when I'm exhausted (which is often), eating healthy, staying clean, taking medicine and getting lots of vitamin C.
   I suppose that if I just had to get sick, it's better to be so now than at Christmas. Hopefully it won't last long.

Yesterday morning, I was finally able to do a Pantene hair masque without disruption or interference from a significant other.
   While I have indeed noticed his absence, it hasn't altogether affected me. Between my sudden illness, Christmas shopping and cleaning up after his infernal cousin, I have stayed busy enough by myself, and have rather enjoyed the peace that solitude brings. I have always been that way.

This morning I put mayonnaise in my hair, and have decided to let it soak in for an hour. I wonder if that will be enough time.  ???  I haven't used mayonnaise since high school.
   This 4-day vacation has allowed me to devote more time to treatments, thus I try to do one every day.

What else...? I've still been taking 3 biotin tablets and 1 vitamin E per day, and I plan to get a trim next month. 4 months between trims seems a fairly good record.

Now I must go, for I feel weary and faint, and my body aches. I've also just realized that I have no idea what time I put the mayonnaise in my hair, so I guess I'll just time it an hour from now.  :-/

I hope you get better soon!  

That's interesting about your water fluctuations.  Mine does the same thing - really big extremes so I'm freezing one second, and scalded next.  We have to make sure not to not turn the kitchen sink on when someone is in the shower.   ::)

Cynde

The mayo treatment yesterday left my hair feeling "heavy." Not greasy or anything (I washed it twice), just heavy. *shrug* It didn't seem like a good thing.

Today I washed twice with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, with a vinegar rinse in between. Conditioned once with the corresponding Herbal Essences conditioner, but didn't leave it in for the full duration of my shower.

The conditioner brought just a teensy bit of that chemical burn feeling. But it might have just been my dry winter skin.

I plan to use the Herbal Essences S&C that I bought the other day. Figure it's worth a shot.

The little food flies that swarm the kitchen (as well as the rest of the house because the clowns like to leave food out) got into the last of my pumpkin pie, so I had no breakfast this morning.

I spent most of the day in bed, trying to get well. I have work tomorrow.

Last night, I decorated my mini tree. I've had it plugged in & glowing most of the day. It's a welcome sight for sick eyes.

My boyfriend still hasn't returned. When asked when he was due back, I jokingly responded, "Oh....probably 2 seconds before he has to be into work on Monday." Guess the joke's on me.

The dæmon has left the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes for me to do. I know your natural response would be something along the lines of "How rude! Why doesn't he do his own dishes himself!" But really, it's better that I do them. No one seems to have ever shown him how.
   He'll just toss them into the dishwasher, all askew, not even bothering to rinse them off first. Moron.

I am so tired of being here. I'm tired of the dæmon and his overabundance of idiocy. I'm tired of being lonely all the time.I'm tired of shelling out so much of my hard-earned pay for a 2nd story dump in the ghetto that I'm not even going to stay in.
   I need a total change of scenery. I need a roommate! A pleasant, female (preferably Christian) roommate with some shred of decency.

These clowns are just too much for me!  :-/

Broke in my bottles of Herbal Essences today. They're both the chamomile/aloe vera/passion flower blend. No chemical burn this time!  :D

Last night after brushing out my hair, my boyfriend commented that my hair looked really healthy.  :D

I guess this Herbal Essences thing is a good omen.  ;)

While he was in the shower last night, I asked if he wanted me to mix up a vinegar rinse for him. With a somewhat puzzled expression, he asked, "What's that?" So I explained the process, and he agreed to it. heh heh heh *evil grin*

In a 1 liter bottle, I mixed a little distilled white vinegar with cold tap water, then brought it in to him.
   "What do I do?" he asked
   "Just turn around," I smiled. When he turned his backside to me, I tilted his head back and proceeded to slowly pour out the bottle's contents over his freshly-shampoo-ed hair.
   With shrieks of, "It's cold!" and "It stinks!" and "You're pouring pickle juice in my hair!" he was sufficiently introduced to the clarifying vinegar rinse.  ;D

After shampoo-ing once more and conditioning (he hadn't had a shower in 3 days - ew!), I took out my raspberry facial scrub and taught him how to exfoliate.
   He's unusually interested in my mineral peel-off masque and my deep conditioning treatments as well, so I may try those next. hehe Slowly but surely, I am luring him over to the dark side! Buahahahahahaaaa!

In other news, I'm still very sick. Herbal Essences and Doyle's Canon have provided welcome distractions. Any type of medicine seems to do little if anything, so I bide my time...

If my hands warm up, I may do a scalp massage tonight.

wrote on Nov 29^th, 2005 at 2:32am:

After shampoo-ing once more and conditioning (he hadn't had a shower in 3 days - ew!), I took out my raspberry facial scrub and taught him how to exfoliate.    He's unusually interested in my mineral peel-off masque and my deep conditioning treatments as well, so I may try those next. hehe Slowly but surely, I am luring him over to the dark side! Buahahahahahaaaa! In other news, I'm still very sick. Herbal Essences and Doyle's Canon have provided welcome distractions. Any type of medicine seems to do little if anything, so I bide my time... If my hands warm up, I may do a scalp massage tonight.

LOL! You're so evil!  ;D

I hope you feel better soon, Angel Spun. *sending get-well vibes*

Hope you are feeling better soon.  Colds are such a bummer.  :-/

Quote:

LOL! You're so evil!

It's a gift.  ;)

Thank you kindly, juri & bikerbraid for your well-wishes.
   What I have is viral & I will just have to wait it out, but I have been trying to take better care of myself in the meantime.

Ahem...
I was called into work early today.  :P  Agony! I nearly fell asleep at my desk.

People have been asking me for Christmas lists. But every time someone pushes a pad of paper & pen in my direction, I simply draw a big dollar sign on it and walk away.
   This year, my top priority is getting my beloved Mercedes fixed....and that isn't going to be cheap!

Today I had a word (or several) with my boyfriend about his cousin's er, "habits." Just the ones at the top of the list/most recent. I informed him about how the dæmon ruined one of our new Farberware frying pans by leaving it on top of the stove (which was turned ON) and then going out for the evening.
   I explained my bewilderment at the fact that my young cousins have long since mastered the art of properly loading a dishwasher and flushing the toilet after they've used it...and yet these things are impossible for a 27-year-old??
   And lastly, I expressed on no uncertain terms that I will not flush the toilet for him every day when he neglects to. "The next time he forgets, I'll make him do it. If he forgets after that, I'll make him drink it," said I, quite in earnest. This seemed to amuse my boyfriend, who said that he would have a talk with his idiot cousin.
   *sigh* He seems to have quite a few of those so-called "talks" with the dæmon, and yet nothing ever seems to change.

I can't wait for my impending promotion at work, whereafter I can rid myself of his evil presence once and for all. Either by moving into a posh new place with the boyfriend or just moving back to East County by myself where the ignoble antics of both clowns will never worry me again.  ;D

So....hair......right. Today was my 3rd? day using Herbal Essences, and yes.... *sigh*....I'm already having 2nd thoughts. The skin on my neck is drying out pretty badly, and I can think of no other cause. It seems that the chemical burn is still happening, even if I can't feel it.  :(  
I guess I'll keep using it, however, until I get sick of it.

Tomorrow is the start of December...time for a brand new measurement!  :D  I really am curious as to the effect of the Biotin that I've been taking. I wonder if I've been taking it long enough to notice a difference.

December also means that the time has come to schedule a trim. I have put 4 months between this and the last one, so hopefully I'll start making some real progress! I miss my waist-length hair & can't wait to have it back. But healthier this time.  ;D

My boyfriend is also growing his hair out, so we're supporting each other. The things he says sometimes strike me so funny that I feel compelled to say, "Spoken like a true longhair!" He really has the attitude for it. It's great. I should add a few of his quotes here, the next time he utters them.

Anywho, I've been home from work for 3 hours now and still haven't removed my boots or even made dinner. Egad, he'll be back from class soon, and will no doubt be ravenous as I. Until next time, long-locked lords & ladies! Adieu.

Dec. 1: Did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo & a vinegar rinse. Followed with the usual Daily Moisture Renewal routine. Didn't use any leave-ins because I was planning to do an overnight treatment. Alas, it was not to be.  :( So my hair just ended up feeling dry that day.

Had my hair up all day, so it was all kinked & curly & I couldn't measure.

Been feeling very alone & neglected. My boyfriend is never around. I was right when I said that being with him means being without him.  :'(

Dec. 2: Woke up & brushed my hair. It had straightened overnight, so I proceeded to measure. 21 inches. What?! That's exactly the same as last month! Is that really right?
   Checked again. 21 inches. Perhaps a shower will help (or not).

Daily Moisture Renewal 2 in 1, followed with the conditioner. Leave-ins currently consist of TRESemmé Detangle leave-in spray & Pantene daily renewal treatment.
   When my hair finally dried, ugh! It was awful! It was greasy underneath the top layer...like I hadn't washed it at all. Or worse yet, like I'd washed it in pure baby oil! Not pretty.

Wore my hair down all day today just so I could take a measurement. Went shopping after work & bought my sister's Christmas present from Bath & Body Works. $80-some-odd later, I arrived home, changed & endeavoured once more to measure my hair.

21 inches. I give up.

On the bathroom mirror, the dæmon roommate wrote: UNCURTIOUS CURTIS. For some reason, I just wasn't feeling anal enough to cross out the UN and write DIS. Obviously these are very under-educated people I live with.  :P
   I say under-educated, not uneducated, because they both have trades that they are more or less devoted to. My boyfriend has been a plumber (and a darn good one!) for several years and the dæmon....well....he's recently thrown himself into massage therapy.  ::)

Speaking of the "boyfriend" (I use quotes because he sure doesn't act like it!!), he isn't here yet again. He wasn't here when I got home, even though he stops working several hours before I do. Same thing happened yesterday. *sigh* Will it ever end?

Hi! I am also trying to grow my hair out, we are both at about the same length! Hope you get that impending promotion so you can be rid of the Daemon roomate! ;)

Thank you for the encouragement, ChelseaB.

All of my fish died Saturday night.  :'(  Long story short, they were all poisoned when my catfish died in the holding tank while I was cleaning the main one. Upon discovering that the water in the holding tank was contaminated, I tried to save them...but they all died within minutes of each other. 2 of them were about 5 years old.
   I had a catfish, an algæ eater and 3 bala sharks. God rest their souls.

My boyfriend says that he will be "on call" at his new job. Meaning, of course, that we could be in the middle of....well, anything, really....and he might have to pick up and leave. I hate this! The very idea of it turns my stomach. I wanted to leave my former husband when his job tried to put him on an "on call" status, so now I feel like a hypocrite just giving this guy a chance. Then again, what choice do I have?

I've been really disgruntled about hair care lately. It just seems that my hair hates everything. Different products have different problems and it's all very overwhelming to think of it.
   I need to change my routine badly. I've been using all kinds of ingredients that aren't good for my hair (like ammonium laureth & lauryl sulfate...and products with oil in them).

I've been wondering how baby shampoo might work on long hair. It doesn't seem to contain the harsh ingredients of almost every other shampoo on the market, and it's oil-free, which is good for me.

I just don't know. I'm feeling really overwhelmed at the moment. My promotion seems like it isn't going to happen, things couldn't much worse on the homefront and I'm having serious "hair issues!"

Perhaps I should seek therapy. They should have hair counselors!  :-/

   

I'm so sorry to hear about your fish.  We have a tank with several fish that are more than 8 years old!  I'm always amazed that they are still alive.  We can't put any new fish in the tank or the old fish will attack them.

I understand your misgivings about the "on call" situation.  Hubby and I both do on call duty.  Hubby's is the worst.  He's on call one week a month and middle of the night calls are common (we count how many nights he is NOT paged) plus he has to work 10 pm Sat night to 8 am Sun morning one weekend a month.  It is a bummer, but after 15 years, we have adjusted.  

On the hair front - why not try a good clarifying shampoo and vinegar rinse to see how your hair responds?  Then follow up with a nice moisturizing conditioner and enjoy your hair!

Angel Spun I'm sorry to hear about your fish.  I use to keep a fish tank for years.  My hubby use to be a security guard (the armed type) and was on call at all hours of the night. It took some getting use to. The only thing I didn't like was tripping over his gun belt in the morning!  As for your hair, Bikerbraid said it all! ;D

OMG, I'm sorry about your fish..  Wow, I didn't know they could die so quickly.

I hope the promotion works out for you!

Cynde

Sorry about your fish!!!! :-/   Time will heal you.

I know i wish there was hair counslers! There are triochogists(ok i cant spell ppl). The Victoria Secrets model Giselle who was dating x boyfriend Leonardo Dicaprio, went to a trichologist and her hair is soooooooooooooo long and gorgeous now!!!

Ohhh I'm sorry to hear about your fish :( I hope you're having a good holiday in other respects.

(((Angel Spun)))

Anais

I'm sorry about your fish, Angel Spun. It's bad enough when one pet dies, but to have them all die in a few minutes of each other...boy.  :(  (((hugs)))

Thank you kindly for the sympathy, one and all.

Yeah, losing all of those little guys was tough. But it's a big relief not to have the hassle of an aquarium anymore, to be honest.

The dæmon roommate is up to his usual old tricks again. Leaving all cupboard doors, drawers, etc. open, not bothering to rinse anything before putting it in the dishwasher, etc. I really think he's doing it just to spite me now. SO mature.  ::)

Yesterday morning, my boyfriend admitted that he has a "thing" for some other girl...and has during the entirety of our relationship. So naturally, this was the last freaking straw. I told him then & there that I no longer wished to be his girlfriend. He didn't speak to me for a day and a half.

I've pretty much known the entire time that he wasn't The One, but I'll be doggoned if I didn't give him a fair chance at it.

After all he's put me through just in this past year, my love, trust, attraction, et al have dwindled down to nothing. For a long time, I loved him just by a thread. Yesterday morning, I could literally hear that last thread SNAP!
 I've typed a letter to him communicating only a few of the biggest problems I have with him because he's never around to discuss them. I'm not really sure what good it will do, but I figure I can't leave without some fair explanation (even though I really don't need to give one).

It's a scary prospect. I know that I need to leave him, but I may lose my nerve. I don't want to draw the problem out any longer, but I also don't want to leave any "loose ends" untied.
   Also, there's the fact that I have nowhere else to go besides my parents' place where I am already not welcome, and my freaking ex-husband lives there to mention!  >:(
 It seems a lowly thing to do, leaving him the week before Christmas...but after all of the lowly things he's done? I don't know...  :(

Ahem. In HAIR news.......... UGH. It's just a nightmare of late. There's dryness, there's LOTS of breakage. I'm not sure whether it's stress, the rough treatment of my bull-in-a-china-shop boyfriend or the result of switching medications, but it's looking like a pretty hopeless case.
   My mother and sister have both noted its poor condition (it was quite healthy before I hooked up with this clown), and it's embarrassing to me that they notice. For years, I've been renowned throughout my family for having very soft, shiny, healthy hair and now it seems in utter ruin. UGH!!! Why can't life just be simple for once?!

The reason I haven't posted in awhile is because our copy of Windows expired and (thanx to the dæmon and his obsessive porn addiction) loaded with viruses. So my boyfriend took it to his buddy's house to have him fix it. I'm using one of the computers at work to type this.  :(

Anyway, I'll try to pop in later. Try to understand if I can't, however. Hopefully things will have improved with my next entry.

Love & Blessings, All.

Sorry about your boyfriend! >:(

Can I ask you a question? Although it is absolutely none of my business, Why in the Heck does your EX live with YOUR parents??? ??? ??? That seems to make things wierd.  Sorry about that.

Curlygirl: WHY in the freaking HECK does my freaking EX live with MY freaking parents?  :P
 To be quite honest, I really don't know. That is unfortunately just the way things seem to have ended up. But let me share the facts with you and offer my own theory.

My former husband was a computer programmer...to an obsessive degree. He was quite successful at his last job, where he made about a $40K annual salary.
 He lived alone in an apartment, and his after-hours activities consisted of drinking, singing karaoke and singing briefly with a band.
   About 7 months ago, he decided to switch careers and quit his programming job to attend flight school. Through his younger brother, he got a part-time job delivering pizzas. I don't think I need to tell you that this doesn't pay well. He told my family about his career switch, and that he was moving out of his apartment, as he could no longer afford it.
 His younger brother (and his own family) and his uncle (who is married) are the only relatives living in the same state as he. His parents live in Missouri, and he has no friends.

My parents, knowing that 1.) he was down and out, 2.) they now had an extra room available because I had just moved out, offered to let him stay in my old room at a rate of $400 per month while he went to flight school. This was supposed to be a very temporary arrangement.
 My parents (specifically my father) have a "soft spot" for kids ("kids" being anyone younger than, say, 30) and the less fortunate ("the less fortunate" being mostly the hopeless cases who can't, or rather, won't get their acts together).

My theory, naturally, is that they heard that his life had taken a turn for the worse (albeit self-inflicted) and took pity on him. I also suspect that they did not anticipate that things would turn out as they have.

Weird, you say? I can assure you that "weird" does not even begin to describe it. It is unnatural, unhealthy and awkward to say the very least.
 It is a nightmare, if I may speak from a psychological standpoint. For one, it sends the (very unhealthy) message to him that he is still an active part of my life even if we are no longer married and see each other FAR less often. He needs to be by himself for awhile, and learn to heal and accept the fact that indeed he ISN'T part of my life any longer.
 For two, it's a big source of stress for yours truly. I try not to visit my parents' house for any reason, knowing that he will likely be there. I daresay that this one singular decision stands out to me as The Stupidest Thing that my parents have ever done.
 For three, it's a tremendous source of unnecessary awkwardness for my boyfriend. When he first heard that my former husband had moved in with my family, he took it personally. He thought that it was their way of saying that they didn't approve of him and wanted me to get back together with my ex. There have indeed been times when my boyfriend has come with me to visit my parents...and my ex was there. Awkward.
 For four, it is a source of stress for my family, as they have slowly begun to see my former husband for the person he really is. They are all very aware that he is an alcoholic (he often drives under the influence!!!) and that he keeps very irregular and disruptive habits. My mother doesn't mind him, but my father and sister want him gone in the very worst way.

From a financial perspective, he is a liability. As I've mentioned, he has lived there for about 7 months and has NEVER paid the agreed amount of rent. Not one copper cent. Being of technical/electronic persuasion, he uses a great deal of electricity, and also eats them out of house and home. All without reimbursement of any kind.

My parents have admitted that allowing him to move in was a mistake. My father wants him gone by the 1st of January. My mother thinks that allowing him to stay until the spring would be better.

In any case, I hope that answers some of your questions. If you're still confused, well, join the club.  :-/

Oh my!   :o

I can't even put in words what I am thinking about your ex's setup with your parents.

Hugs for you and I hope things get straightened out soon!

thankyou angelspun for the explanation. :-/ God will reward you if you are patient.  Unfortunately life sucks. But with wise choices we can try to make the best with what ye have. Goodluck to you!

Oh geez, that is a very awkward home situation.  I know your parents have good intentions, but they have to be aware when their generosity is being taken advantage of.  It sounds like he's had enough time to at least offer a portion of the rent in good faith.  Eating their food just takes the cake.  

Well, I hope it all works out.  It's a bummer to feel uncomfortable visiting your own home.

Cynde

[glb]OMG[/glb]

Why do they wait until January? Or even worse, until spring?

I must say, I cannot start to imagine how you must feel.
I have heard quiet a bit in my life, but that's a first.....

Thanx, you guys.  :)

Update: I retired early one night after giving my boyfriend the letter that I had typed at work about a few of our main incongruencies. He read it in the living room while I tried to fall asleep in the bedroom. I dreaded his reaction.
 Had I done something like that with my former husband, he would have just read it like a laundry list of complaints & cast it aside.
 But my boyfriend entered the room, laid beside me on the bed, put his arms around me, kissed me and said 1.) that he loved me, 2.) that that letter was exactly what he had wanted and 3.) that he had never had feelings for anyone else since the night we met.
 Turns out that when he said that he had a "thing" for another girl, he was not yet awake and very incoherent. He has a tendency to say all kinds of off-the-wall things on the verge of consciousness, whether accurate or not.
 He promised that he had been completely true from day 1, and that I was out of my mind to ever doubt it. He also said that he would address everything in that letter. I will refrain from graphic detail. It's all very personal & would bore the crap out of y'all anyway. But that letter brought about a world of good.  :)

In hair news.....I've been using Herbal Essences for awhile now without any chemical burn whatsoever.  :D
 BUT... the formulas still don't agree with my fine hair, and it becomes hopelessly tangled. *sigh* I give up.

Tomorrow, I plan to do a clarifying wash and go back to my beloved Pantene. I surrender!  :P

Pantene is now promoting the heck out of their new "Winter Rescue" products, which are really the same old Daily Moisture Renewal ones that I had been using for years.  ::)  The little silver snowflake on the bottle is cute though. Reminds me of a necklace that I have.

This morning I woke up to find that my boyfriend had been playing Santa into the wee hours, because my mini tree was on, stockings were hung on the wall just above it, and wrapped presents laid below it. What a nice surprise.  :D

Just before he left for work, he said that my real Christmas present would come "at the end of next month." That's after my birthday, of course, but whatever. I am filled with curiostiy and anticip.....pation!  ;)

I washed all of my combs & brushes in the dishwasher last night, along with my car keys, my oil spray bottle, the coffee pot and other random, assorted items. They all came out clean as a whistle.

I used my Rachel Stephens #45 comb to detangle my hair before getting into the shower. Then I did the usual clarifying routine: Pantene Purity shampoo, cold water rinse, vinegar rinse, cold water rinse, Purity shampoo wash again, cold water rinse. Followed with Pantene DMR -er, "Winter Rescue" conditioner, cold rinse, then a light conditioner after, and finished with a cold water rinse.

My hair was difficult to comb out, not having had cones in it for so long. The tangle & oil factor what whas made me decide to switch from Herbal Essences in the first place.
 I used both Pantene's light spray conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment spray before running my Rachel Stephens #45 through it. While still damp, I sprayed the usual mixture of 1 part  baby oil, 2 parts water onto the ends & called it good.

Now I'm scarfing popcorn with only 7 minutes to get to work. Aaaaah!
 I'll try to write more later!

wrote on Dec 23^rd, 2005 at 6:18pm:

I washed all of my combs & brushes in the dishwasher last night, along with my car keys, my oil spray bottle, the coffee pot and other random, assorted items. They all came out clean as a whistle.

LOL!  I'm glad to see I'm not the only one that uses the dishwasher to wash things other than dishes!  I even put the kitchen sponge and dish cloth in the dishwasher!

hehehe bikerbraid. Dishwashers are awesome inventions!

Hair Harm for the Holidays: So for Christmas, I got a Conair "spa package" loaded with metal clips, plastic & velcro rollers, 2 cheap, round BBB's (which I suspect are actually synthetic  :o ) and...a blowfryer!! Dun dun dunnnnn...
 I also received 2 metal barrettes which are pretty, but I don't think I'll ever wear them.  :(
 *shrug* My family doesn't know any better. I just had to smile and say thank you and at least act grateful.

I've been ping-ponging (yes, I realize that's not actually a word!) between Pantene and Herbal Essences lately, even though the latter does nothing for my hair. Nothing good at least.
 So today I did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse and lots of cold water, of course.

I'm not sure about following my regular conditioner with a light conditioner as a final step. It doesn't seem to have any real benefits, and just takes up extra time in the shower. I think I'll cut that step out of the routine.

Ever The Procrastinator: I still haven't scheduled a trim. Even if I made an appointment today, it wouldn't happen before the end of the month. This means that by the time I actually do go in for my regular half-inch trim, I would have put 6 months between it and the last one.  :o  Egad.

My posting here has been less frequent due to the fact that my home computer is infected with about 113 viruses. Spyware, it claims. *sigh* Bloody infernal machines. And I know my blasted roommate isn't helping!!  >:(

Anger Management: What really cheeses me off is the way my boyfriend acts like everything his dæmon cousin does is just perfectly normal & A-OK.
 He welches on rent - my boyfriend shrugs it off, even when I have to make up the difference.  >:(
 He sneaks into our room to "borrow" my lotions for his glorious self-loving sessions - my boyfriend does nothing.  >:(
 He eats us out of house and home - my boyfriend then asks me to buy groceries.  >:(
 He stays up late deep-frying everything in sight, demolishing our kitchen, watching movies with the volume wayyy up, talking very loudly on his cell phone to the stupid blonde girl that he wishes to impregnate (all while I have to wake up earliest for work) - my boyfriend does nothing.  >:(
 He uses our computer to feed his sick obsessions and loves himself all over the bloody apartment (honestly, I have found "evidence" in places no one would think possible) - my boyfriend dismisses it as perfectly normal behaviour.  >:(
 And my beloved beau wonders why I'm not happy. WTF?!  >:(  Ahem. In other news...

At The Office: I have finally learned how to secure a bun with hair sticks!  :D  This is a feat for me. I've practiced with pencils.

A dear co-worker commented on my hair today as she passed my desk. I was brushing my hair with a BBB and she said, "That's how your hair stays so silky! It's so fine!"
 I told her that I was planning to grow my hair down to my butt again. She said, "I'll bet that stimulates the growth too." Referring to my BBB. It was a nice moment.

Pearly Bottles of Wisdom:  I plan to stay on the Pantene 10-day plan for an all-over improvement to my hair. The 10th day will fall right on the 8th...which also happens to be my birthday. Healthier hair makes a great gift!  ;)

That's all for now. Er, well...that's not ALL, by far, but that's all that I have time to type for today. More later. Peace.

Hey Angle Spun :)

It's the thought that counts with gifts like these isn't it? ::)

I'm sorry about your roommate, that sounds horrible >:( have you tried discussing it with him ??? maybe he can tone it down a bit...

And congratulations on both securing the bun (took me a week, except i practiced with chopsticks ::)) and the comment, they just make your day :)

Happy New Year!

Quote:

I'm sorry about your roommate, that sounds horrible  have you tried discussing it with him  maybe he can tone it down a bit... And congratulations on both securing the bun (took me a week, except i practiced with chopsticks ) and the comment, they just make your day   Happy New Year!

Thanx, Beesan.
   Unfortunately, I find it best to just avoid him at all possible cost. It sounds cowardly, I know, but in this situation I truly think it best. The guy has some serious mental/psychological problems and I don't think a confrontation on my part would help.

Crappy New Year: I came home from work Friday evening with a fever of 103! I had been feeling awful all day at the office...wanting to just lay down on the desk or the floor or something. By the end of the day, I felt freezing cold and very tired. Though I was in no condition to drive, I had to.
 When I got home, I put on my pajamas, cranked up the heater and got into bed, in so much pain that I was nearing tears. It wasn't until after my boyfriend got home, discovered my condition, rushed to the store and returned with medicine and a thermometer that we learned just how serious my illness was. Apparently I had caught yet another virus during the night. 3rd one in about 6 weeks. So I was bedridden for New Year's.  :'(
   I'm doing a little better these days. Though my mother is bringing me some prescription antibiotics for my nonstop cough.  :(

The Dæmon Roommate: Stormed off yesterday morning, apparently frustrated by the fact that he couldn't take a shower before leaving for the day because I was in it. I wasn't aware of this, of course, until I got an FYI lecture about it from my boyfriend...who, of course, is always rushing to his cousin's defense.  ::)
 I'm caught in an emotional limbo about it. I mean I might be more sympathetic if the guy (dæmon) wasn't the complete moron that he is. And yet I feel bad for my lack of sympathy.
 That isn't to say I don't have any at all. I certainly don't mean or wish to inconvenience anyone, and I had no idea that our schedules would clash. I don't want him to be angry with me.
   I often think of moving back in with my parents in East County. Granted, they are terribly prejudiced and abusive people, and granted my freaking EX lives there...and granted they don't want me to move back in. But...who am I to come between two blissfully dysfunctional cousins? It seems quite obvious to me that I am the real problem in this arrangement. Oh, I wish I knew someone who needed a roommate! *sigh* I don't wish to desert my beau, but "having an out" so to speak would be convenient if I ever decided that I really did wish to leave.

Hair: Oh glorious revelation! I have had quite an awakening on the hair front...but more about that when I return from work!

I'm sorry to hear about all that, Angel Spun. Being sick and having to live with a daemon, ugh. I hope you feel better soon, though.

As for living arrangements, it sounds like you're stuck between a rock and a hard place. Even though your BF's cousin sucks rocks, going by what you wrote about your parents, you might be better off where you are now (if only a little). I don't blame you for wanting to leave. I know I'd feel the same way if I were in your situation.

Can't wait to hear about your hair revelation! (((hugs)))

Angel Spun, sorry to hear you're sick!  I'd bet your unending stress from your living situation is constantly keeping your immune system weak.

Have you considered checking out message boards at a college or gym for a new roommate situation?

Good Luck, hope you're right as rain  ;D

I'm so sorry to hear about you being sick, and the situation you're in :-/  :-/


http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Beesan19/soon.gif and hang in there.

Juri: LOL @ sucks rocks. You're very right about being caught between a rock & a hard place. That's a phrase that's been going through my mind for months, oddly enough.  :-/
 You're also right about my being just slightly better off where I am. That's a big part of why I haven't left already.

Sakina: I think you may be onto something about the stress weakening my immune system.
 I much prefer to take up residence with someone I already know. Picking someone from a message board sounds pretty scary. You already never know what you're in for as it is...

Beesan: LOL cute icon!

You guys rock!

And now.....

Sweeeeeeeet revelatiooooooonnnn: About 4 days into the 10-Day Pantene miracle, my new, unused bottles of Herbal Essences began calling to me from the closet where I had stashed them.
 The thought of their alluring fragrance tempted me. I took them down, unscrewed the caps and smelled them. Lord, that scent!! I was hooked.

That night, I mixed up a vinegar rinse and placed it next to those coveted bottles in my shower basket to await the morn.
 Tuesday, I awoke feeling a little bit like a kid on Christmas morning, silly as it may sound. Just the thought of what lay ahead...  ;)  No one else was up, and with a sly smile, I took up my basket of goodies and made for the bathroom.

There, I surrendered to the power of herbal. heh I did a full-on Clarifying wash, complete with vinegar rinse. Cold water all the way. Followed with the Replenishing conditioner. I used the leave-in spray conditioner before detangling with my Rachael Stephens #45.
 My hair was still wet when I left for work, as usual, but it had a totally different aura. That gorgeous scent radiated from it...and it felt like a great weight had been lifted. The long days, weeks, years of suffocating under the cone and conditioner residue of Pantene had been washed away. And when my hair dried, it felt (and smelled) fabulous! I ran my purse brush through it at work and couldn't stop touching it afterwards!  :)

After work, I got a wild hair up my butt and drove far off into the mountains of East County. There, with strokes of divine inspiration, I wrote like crazy. Not just bits & pieces, but full poems!

A dear friend of mine speculates that the Herbal Essences has seeped through my scalp and is affecting my brain. I have a feeling he may be right, although not at all in a bad way!
 Since the switch, I have been feeling much more inspired, philosophical and intellectually keen.

So, I am now officially an Herbal Essences convert. Maggie, you know I hate to abandon my Pantene sistah...and you're welcome to scream profanities at your monitor and send me multiple death threats ('cause that would just be awesome!), but so it must be for me.

Thus begins a new chapter in my hair's life. More on the reason behind the revelation later.

Sorry to hear you got sick.  I hope you are feeling better now!

Cynde

Uh oh, it looks like someone's got the urge. The urge to Herbal!

Sorry, I couldn't help myself. ;D

lol juri  ;)

So I used the red Rainforest Flowers formulas again... Mass chemical burn!  >:(  :-/  Looks like I'll either have to stick to the original line or just give it up.

The last week has been murder on me both physically and mentally. I have a constant, violent cough which makes working difficult (being that I talk on the phone for a living!) and sleeping impossible.

My abs hurt from the relentless coughing, and today I actually got a headache from it. And don't you hate those coughing fits that seem like they're never going to end? Where your eyes water and you can barely breathe? I actually did that in the freaking middle of Target this evening. God, was it embarrassing! I tried to hold it together as best I could and make the most discrete exit possible, but still...I don't think I fooled anyone. I was that nasty sick lady with the watery eyes & runny nose who kept coughing....  :-[  :P Just call me Dr. Smooth.  :-/

Anywho, mentally I've just been freaking out about everything. From senseless trifles to grand-scale spiritual confusion. It must be triggered by my illness. Maybe that fever did cause some brain damage...

Anyway, while I was roaming around Target, waiting for my boyfriend to show up, I noticed something. Has anyone else noticed that any store's given stock of Pantene Pro-V takes up like half a freaking aisle? These people are marketing geniuses, I tell you. Their plot for monopolistic world domination is working.

The roommate is still disgusting as ever. During the Christmas week, while he was out of state, I had the entire kitchen sterile and spotless as a hospital. Now it is once again in utter ruin. I'm talking Ground-Freaking-Zero. The counter is a disaster zone, and there are dirty dishes and food left out everywhere...which of course attracts and breeds those tiny little food flies. UGH! He's the devil himself, I'll swear to it! I am beyond wit's end with him. He needs to go!!!!!!  >:(

As for the hair? Well....I really don't know. I may have been onto something with that cone-free, herbaly revelation. I may just be mentally fried. Perhaps it's the lack of sleep. Perhaps it's all of the above.
 Either way, I'm going to have to take a very long siesta and try to tap into the deep-rooted, innate wisdom of life. Learn all over again how to do what feels right.
 I remember reading somewhere about how many theories and philosophies about life are actually relevant to long hair also. I wish I could remember where I read it. I could use a little more inspiration now.  :P

Sorry to disappoint you, Cynde dear, but it may be quite awhile before I get better.  :(

I hope you get better soon Angelspun!!! Also i enjoy reading your journal. You write well. I would like to hear some of your poems.

Thank you kindly, Curlygirl.  :)  *blush*

Just for you:
 This one was written in  September '04:

WE/US

Take my hand
and WE are invincible
Together
WE can face anything
That would destroy
You and I
Alone

US
WE

Such simple words
With so much power
Where You and I would fail
WE will triumph

WE
US

Two letters
Two hearts
Two lives
United
In love

©All Rights Reserved

This is probably my most "famous" piece, written in 1996 (and yes, I "borrowed" the title from AC/DC):

Back In Black

Standing alone amongst the world
A quiet loneliness unfurled
What no one sees, no one knows
Silence like a cancer grows
Solitude is peace inside
Burning tears no longer cried
Standing alone I see the light
That fades within the dead of night

©All Rights Reserved

Very beautiful........I love poems. Its such a wonderful way to express yourself in a healthy way!! Also i read keeping a journal is healing. Goodluck to us!

Thank you. Good luck indeed.  ;)

Today I did the clarifying routine yet again. *sigh*
   I put the showerhead on its water saver setting and did the usual.

Pantene Purity shampoo, vinegar rinse, Purity shampoo again, Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Finished with a light conditioner (I'm still trying to use the last of it up). Cold water all the way.

In the end, my hair felt fabulous! I didn't use any leave-ins. Just let it air dry before detangling it with my Rachael Stephens #45. It all felt very natural, so I don't regret doing it.

I was going to try and measure my hair today, so I left it down all day, not wishing for an updo to curl it up. But wouldn't you know it...I sorta almost fell asleep in my boyfriend's arms. That kinked my hair up nicely.  :-/
   Surrendering to the fact that I would just have to measure tomorrow, I put in the Overnight Repair Intensive Treatment. And here I sit hours later.

I suppose I'll have to go to bed sometime...

This morning I was rudely awakened by my boyfriend who had a sudden, overpowering urge to play disc golf at 6:00 in the morning.  >:(
   I was able to fall back asleep again, fortunately. Even if only for a little while.

I actually got up around 10:00 and headed straight for the shower to rinse out my overnight treatment. Then I washed with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo, and put in a deep conditioning treatment.
   I still have it in. Actually, I've lost track of how long it's been in, but I'm sure it must have been a couple of hours by now.  :P

I've eaten almost an entire bag of raw spaghetti. That and a Granny Smith apple are all I've had to eat all day.  :(

My boyfriend wants to catch a matinée movie this afternoon. We're going to try and see "Munich."

*sigh* He returned briefly around noon, but is gone again. I've never been kidding when I said that to be with him is to be without him.
   He says he's going back to disc golf some more with a buddy...but after all of the bs he's pulled within the last year, it would be unnatural for my suspicions not to be arroused. I just don't know about that guy.  :(

Anywho, my bag of spaghetti is now empty, so I'll take that as a cue to rinse this stuff out of my hair & start the day. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. It's my birthday.

Happy birthday to me.

Today I once again woke up filled with anticipation for what my shower had in store. I was going to use Herbal Essences today, which is always a sensual joy to me.

Of course, I had to clean up the bathroom somewhat, as the dæmon roommate had recently taken a shower himself...and used MY Rainforest Flowers shampoo!  >:( I don't know why that irks me, but it does. I mean, it does chemically burn my skin & I want to get rid of it ASAP...but it's just something about the idea of him using my stuff without permission. He does it all the freaking time. Bloody freeloader.  >:(

Anywho, after returning the bathroom back to an almost acceptable state, I hopped into the shower & tried to make the most of it. You can bet I power-rinsed those red bottles with VERY hot water, too. I can't stand the idea of touching things after he's touched them. I know well enough where his hands have been.  :P

I washed twice with the red Rainforest Flowers Replenishing shampoo, and conditioned twice with the matching conditioner.
   What I love about Herbal Essences is that it really makes my hair feel clean after using it. Pantene is so loaded up with cones and conditioners that it leaves a very thick film behind, even after lots of rinsing.

About halfway through my shower, my boyfriend came barging into the bathroom and told me that I wasn't supposed to be up yet.  ??? He had been gone all morning...and had apparently brought back breakfast, which he had intended to serve to me in bed. Aww. And I had to to and toss a wrench into such sweet plans.  :-/

He actually came in several more times, leading on and on about some secret plans and the difficulties he was having trying to make them work out, but not telling me much so as not to foil my surprise...basically just being vague enough to confuse the crap out of me.  ??? That boy's up to something.

So anyway, apparently, he had to go up to a friend's house to work out part of the details, and I could finally finish my shower without interruption. Oy.

So after all of this and some drying and dressing, I used Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner (yes, I realize the 2nd ingredient is a cone  :-/) and some other leave-in conditioner that I had lying around and am trying to use up. Carefully detangled with my Rachael Stephens #45, which I had washed last night along with all of my other combs & brushes, and went about the day.

I heated up & buttered the cranberry muffin that my beloved had brought back for me and started a load of laundry.

It's funny...for a long time, my birthdays would always end up being the worst days of my life. The sort of Murphy's Law days where everything that can possibly go wrong does, and then you're slammed with major unexpected catastrophes on top of that. But so far, that hasn't happened. *looks around, expecting a piano to fall through the ceiling...or my roommate to walk in*  :P

So far as plans tonight, I think my family is taking me to the Cheesecake Factory for dinner. My boyfriend will be there...unless he gets a call.  >:( MAN, would that ruin things. I can see it now. We've all just ordered when suddenly, his phone rings, he gets up and bails on my birthday dinner, I'm left feeling utterly abandoned and everyone else at the table suddenly has nothing good to say about him.  :-/ :(!! Egad.

But even if it does come to that, next weekend is for us. He's planned it out.
   I have no idea what's in store...but I know the depths of his singular creativity, so I'll just have to be ready for it, whatever it may be.

Happy Birthday, Angel Spun!!! :D :D

Although the day hasn't started off all that wonderfully, I hope you have a good one!

Happy Birthday, AngelSpun!  No matter what transpires, I hope you will find a way to enjoy your birthday!

*Crosses fingers*

I hope you had a very good birthday and Cheesecake Factory was fun.  I have to drive 1.5 hours to get to the nearest one....but oh, it is so worth it! :D

Happy Bday AngelSpun!!!  Hope you had  a good one!

[glb]HAPPY BRITHDAY!![/glb] http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/i/partytime.gif

Happy Birthday!  I hope you had a wonderful day. :)

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Beesan19/bday.gif


I hope you had a great B-day :D



P.S. i hope your cough is gone :-/, but just in case it hasn't, i would highly recommend drinking Chamomile with honey once in the morning and before bed, it's like magic! better than any lousy cough medicine :P :)

P.P.S. make sure that it isn't mixed with any other herb

And again Happy Birthday  :D ETA: i love your poetry, it's beautiful

Happy belated Birthday!
http://tinypic.com/k054lh.jpg

Thank you kindly, everyone!! I am touched.  :D

My sister had to work last night, so she wouldn't have been able to come to the Cheesecake Factory.  :( So I decided to move my birthday dinner to the restaurant where she works instead: The Claim Jumper.
   Not only would she be there, but it's cheaper, there's less pressure to look nice (my complexion has been rebelling lately), and my sister's new boyfriend, who also works there, would likely be there as well and I would finally get to meet him.

Dinner was nice. I had something called a B&B Burger, which consists of about a half pound of meat, bacon, blue cheese and some other stuff. It was probably the biggest burger I've ever seen.
   My father had a steak and freakishly large onion rings. I swear, the onion that they used to make them must have been the size of a small pumpkin.  :o
   My mother had an enormous club sandwich.

We even ordered something for my boyfriend who was on call & would try to meet up with us later. His favourite item on the menu is the Stuffed Baked Idaho, which is (duh) a baked potato.....with everything in it.

My parents gave me 2 cards with $$$ inside. Woohoo!

Toward the end of dinner, my boyfriend finally showed up - looking like a million bucks. His hair was still wet from the shower and his blonde "surfer" hair was slicked back....the ends reach his shoulders now.  ;) He had on nice, clean shirt, but whispered to me when I got up to hug him that his pants were really dirty.  :P haha

We then relocated to the bar, where my sister works. There, she took our drink orders, and my boyfriend got to have his potato.
   My sis returned with our drinks and had covered the top of my Shirley Temple with cherries, muttering something about it being "special for the birthday girl."  ;D I love that kid.

She brought out a total of 3 desserts to us: The raspberry white chocolate cheesecake that I had ordered, the GIANT ice cream cookie sandwich that my mother ordered and a special ice cream cake with a candle in it just for me.

Everyone sang Happy Birthday to me, and for the moment I thought about what a trip it was to be flanked by 2 such fine singers - my father and my boyfriend (the latter of which threw in a couple of grace notes at the end, which I dug!) :)  Then I made a wish and (accidentally, by laughing) blew out the candle.

I ate most of my ice cream cake and part of my cheesecake while my parents & boyfriend shared the ice cream cookie sandwich. Most of the cheesecake, however, I boxed up, took home & had for breakfast this morning.  :P

And as to the allusions to this big surprise present that my boyfriend has planned for me, this morning he said, "Bring a swimsuit."  ???
   All I can think is a swimsuit? In January?? We must be going someplace really hot!  :-/
   This evening he said something like, "I've already paid," and "It's non-refundable."

All in all, a good birthday. And the mystery builds...
 

Ooooh, if you need a swimsuit it sounds like a good suprise!  

Also, the Shirley Temple is my mother's favorite drink.  It's a sweet little drink, just like her! ;)

Quote:

It's a sweet little drink, just like her!

Aww, pan. She must be to have such a cool, devoted daughter.  :)

More clues this morning. My boyfriend confirmed that the place he's whisking me away to this weekend is indeed quite warm  :-/ I don't dig heat!

He said it is also about 6 hours away, but is NOT Las Vegas. Darn!

He also said that we have to take my car.  :o WTF, mate?! He knows what sort of condition it's in! Is he nuts?! Granted, his truck would never make it, but I'm not sure that my car would either! Plus, it's a Mercedes!! If anything goes wrong with it, repairs are 3-5 times the cost of any other car. I still need to drive it to & from work every day after this trip, ya know...  >:(

Thus, the plot thickens, and my curiosity is ever arroused.  ???

I've jumped back onto the Pantene 10-Day Challenge. My hair is in need of some serious repair these days! The ends are so dry it ain't funny - I worry that they will split soon! I have already adjusted my oil spray to be evenly ½ baby oil and ½ water, and I am planning (remorsefully) to take a full inch off upon my next trim.  :( I have simply put too much time between my last trim and my next.  

I've been trying for 2 days to contact the lady who trims my hair, but she hasn't been home. I'm beginning to panic.  :( I won't be able to trim or do any treatments this weekend due to being out of town, so I've been trying like heck to get in touch with the scissor lady to see if she can save my hair from utter ruin on Thursday. *draws an unsteady breath* It's my last hope.

I got a birthday card from my grandparents in WA today. Enclosed was yet another check made out to my married name. They sent one for Christmas as well.  :-/
   I'm going to send them a thank you card with both checks enclosed, politely informing them that I haven't used that accursed name in 2 years, and all of my ID has long since been changed.

Anywho, once again I have no idea how long I've had this current treatment in my hair, but I must rinse it out now. Then it's off to the mall - woohoo!

I am so tired.  :(

I finally went to bed at around 2:30 am. Boyfriend woke me up at 6:00 or so, and kept me up until about 7:30. Woke up again, still quite tired, at around 9:30.

It was too late to do a hair treatment by then, so I just pulled all of my new hair goods out of their bags and played with them for a few minutes before getting into the shower.

I bought a pack of velour scrunchies made by Goody. Most of them in colours that I would actually wear.

I also picked up 3 new Goody shower caps (the cheap-o ones). One in bright purple, the other 2 in the most godawful shades of Barbie and bubblegum pink.  :P

I also restocked my Pantene supply.
   Got the Daily Moisture Renewal Intensive Restoration Treatment, the Intensive Moisturizing Masque and a few of the overnight treatments all from Wal*Mart.
   While I was there, I noticed this lady with gorgeous hair!! It was wavy, down to her waist with fairytale shape at the ends, which were perfectly curled. I wondered for a minute if it was fake, but I can tell when people are sporting rugs. This was, of course, in the same shopping center as the Claim Jumper where I had my birthday dinner & saw all of those other long-haired lasses.  :) Rather makes me miss East County...

At Target, I picked up the Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo & conditioner...both of which had special sneak-preview sample bottles of the new Restoratives line, which has not yet hit shelves.

When I unwrapped them this morning, I discovered that the formulas are blue, they have a lovely green tea sort of fragrance, and milder ingredients. No ammonium laureth or lauryl anything. And very few cones!

Shampoo: Water, Sodium Laureth Sulfate, Sodium Lauryl Sulfate, Cocamidopropyl Betaine, Sodium Chloride, Citric Acid, Sodium Citrate, Fragrance, Cocamide MEA, Sodium Benzoate, Tetrasodium EDTA, PEG-60, Almond Glycerides, Guar Hydroxypropyltrimonium Chloride, Linoleamidopropyl PG-Dimonium Chloride Phosphate, Panthenol, Panthenyl Ethyl Ether, Menthylchloroisothiazolinone, Menthylisothiazolinone, Sodium Xylenesulfonate, Blue 1, Red 33

Conditioner: Water, Stearyl Alcohol, Behentrimonium Chloride, Cetyl Alcohol, Dimethicone, Panthenol, Panthenyl Ethyl Ether, Fragrance, Disodium EDTA, Benzyl Alcohol, Sodium Hydroxide, Menthylchloroisothiazolinone, Menthylisothiazolinone, Blue 1, Red 33

I will definitely have to try these and post a product review!!  :D These could be just what I've been looking for.

My boyfriend told me that my entire family knows what my surprise is. He said that the instant I got up to use the restroom at Claim Jumper, my parents jumped on him and demanded to know where he was taking me. I guess my sister was there too, because he said that once he had told them where we were going, my sis said to him, "You know MY birthday is next month..."
   If it interests her, it must be good!  ;)

Today, he called and said that he had something exciting to tell me about where we were going this weekend. I asked whether it would give away the surprise, and he said that it would. So...I actually told him not to tell me!
   It would be rather a waste for him to put so much effort into creating this big surprise only to give it away prematurely. I'd rather have it honestly.

Every day, I get more intrigued and excited about it. Friday is almost here, and we'll be leaving around 2:00 pm, I guess. This is a trip! heh For once, I am at the mercy of the singular creativity of his mind....and that's kind of a turn-on, actually!  ;)

Anywho, I must tend to the heaping piles of laundry on my floor.

The Big Surprise: So today's the day. In about an hour, maybe less, I'll be whisked away, blindfolded, to God knows where in my own car.

Yesterday, I was convinced that he was taking me to Mexico.  :o Scary! And hilarious that he thought we were taking my Mercedes!!!

Speaking of which, I went out to East County today to pick up a few things that we need for the trip, and also to get my car fixed & ready. I think it should make the journey now. Hopefully.  :-/

Work: I arranged to work the AM shift today so I would have time to tie up the loose ends by the time my boyfriend gets out of work. Had to do payroll, which was more messed up than I'd ever seen it. But I did get a few chances to talk to my future boss over the phone (one of many advantages to being the company switchboard operator). That should keep me fresh in his mind.
   There are now 2 positions opening in the department that I wish to transfer to. 3 applicants so far, including myself. It's playing out like a reality TV show:
2 positions,
3 applicants...
Who will walk away with a full-time, full-benefits prize,
and who will just walk away....? Dun dun dunnnnnnn! heh I'm such a weirdo.
   So basically, I'm a shoe-in (at least I like to think!). Here's hoping! It's about time I had a grown-up job.  :-/

Hair News: I finally scheduled an appointment with the trim lady. Woohoo! But I'm planning on having at least an inch taken off. The ends are just fried.  :(

Today is Day 4 of the Pantene 10-Day Challenge. I am definitely feeling "softer tresses." heh

I don't know what I'm going to do about my hair over the weekend. I won't be able to do treatments...heck, I'm not sure if I'll even be able to oil it! But I'll bring my bottle just in case. Maybe the usual discreet velvet scrunchie bun will do.

Anyway, I'll make my next entry after the big surprise weekend vacation...that is, if I survive it.  :-/

Love to all.

Day 8 of the Pantene 10-Day Challenge. Right in the midst of "shinier hair."
   I haven't gotten to really look at it lately. The past few days have been so busy. I don't know whether my hair is shiny or not...but it feels better.
   Day 10 falls on the 18th...same day as my trim. Hopefully I'll see some grand improvements by then.

Almost fell asleep at work today. Then I made a pot of coffee for a manager visiting from our Lakewood location...and got strung out on the combination of caffeine & sugar. I felt faint, my hands were shaking & everything. *sigh* I hate caffeine.

So.......The Big Surprise.

Friday evening, my boyfriend & I packed up my Mercedes and drove to a gas station. He filled up the tank while I went into the convenience store and bought 2 enormous bottles of Evian. They will be great for vinegar rinses when empty.  ;)
   So then I came back to the car & wrapped a long, silk scarf about my head for a blindfold (my boyfriend insisted that I be blindfolded for the drive), and we were off.
   The drive took about 2 hours...I guess. A few times, I put my hand to the window and remarked how the air outside of it must be freezing cold. I could hear other cars whizzing by, and asked my boyfriend whether we were passing everyone or everyone was passing us.
   He said that everyone was passing us and driving like maniacs. I half-joked that we must be somewhere near L.A. because people tend to drive like that between there and San Diego. He said the same about Mexico.

So eventually, we slowed, went through a few lights, made a few turns, and then came to a stop. My boyfriend told me to wait in the car for a few minutes while he went to take care of something, but not to remove the blindfold. I did as he said.
   In the distance, I could hear what sounded like either the ocean, traffic, or both. I touched the cold glass of the window again and started asking questions aloud to my car: "Are we in Mexico, Cedric?" "Have we ever been here before?"
   Within minutes, my boyfriend had returned and opened up my door, telling me to step out, but still not remove the blindfold.
   As I clung to him, he led me through a hotel lobby, into an elevator, down a hallway (where I could hear Mexican voices) and into our hotel room. Once there, he removed my blindfold at last, led me to the window and asked if I knew where I was.

He told me to stay in the room while he went back down to the car to retrieve our bags. While he was gone, I looked around the room. All of the signs and products were in English, so I figured that we were either still in the states or in a very tourist-y area of Mexico.
   And then I spotted it. On the exit map on the back of the door. A heading which read: Portofino Inn, Anaheim, CA.
   Anaheim....we were going to Disneyland!!!!!!!!!

When my boyfriend returned, I pretended just for a little while longer not to know where I was. Finally he broke it down: "We're at Disneyland, sweetheart." And then he announced his plan to buy both of us annual passes!!

And so it was. Saturday morning, we each got our passes. Sunday morning, we spent 2 hours at a stupid timesharing seminar. We didn't buy anything, but walked out with the $100 Disney Dollars they had promised us...which we blew in about 2 seconds upon entering the park again.  ;D
   Sunday evening, my parents showed up. We met up with them just before they had to leave...and the last thing my father said to my boyfriend was, "We're real proud of you."  :D

All in all, a very good weekend. My beloved is now an official Disneyland addict, and we already have plans to go back this Friday. And should he ever find his way to reading this.....thank you so much, my darling, for the best birthday present ever!!  ;D

That's such a cute birthday surprise! I'm glad things went well.  :D

My hair feels bleagh today. I don't know whether I used too many leave-in sprays this morning or if it's just the buildup of cones and conditioners from the past 9 days, but something is definitely not right. My roots are feeling pretty greasy.

During my break at work, I tried out Pantene's Ultimate Finish Perfecting Crème....bad idea.
   Now my hair is all stuck together & very difficult to brush out.  >:(  I won't be using that stuff again!

*sigh* This is usually the point in my routine when Herbal Essences starts looking good again.

I dunno. Maybe all I need is a good clarifying wash and a vinegar rinse. Maybe I need to rethink my whole routine. Heck, maybe I need to rethink my whole life.  :-/

Anywho, one of my boyfriend's buddies is here to work on the computer now, so I'm going to cut this short.

Bye for now.

I just read your entry about your boyfriend taking you to Disneyland, and  :)  :)  :)  :)  :) OMG that is incredible cute  :)  :)  :)

Very sweet Boyfriend! Sounds like a keeper!

Quote:

Sounds like a keeper!

haha We'll see...  ::)

My phone rang this morning at 6:17, and I flipped it open only to learn that my mother had been frantically calling throughout the night to tell me that she had been called into jury duty that morning, and needed me to cover her shift at the office.  >:(
   Just over an hour before I had to be there, and I still had heavy olive oil in my hair. So I jumped into the shower, got dressed and flew out the door. Didn't use any leave-in's or anything.
   Wouldn't you know it? My roots were still greasy after my hair dried! And I shampoo-ed twice this morning!  >:( And the ends are in dire need of a trim!

Speaking of which, seeing as I was called into work that morning, I missed my trim appointment, which was supposed to be at 9:30!  >:(
   See, we had this all planned out. I had a hair appointment in the morning, so my mother was supposed to work the morning shift. She had a hair appointment (at a different place) in the afternoon, so I would have the afternoon shift. We split the same position at the same office, you see...
   But now thanx to the infernal government and the infamous convenience of "civic duty," I ended up working for 9½ hours straight with NO LUNCH BREAK!!!  >:(
   Meanwhile, she got out of jury duty at 12:30 and went directly to her hair appointment afterwards. *SIGH!*
   Some days, it just doesn't pay to chew through the leather straps in the morning...

So, right, my hair......still feels bleeaagh. More today than yesterday, in fact. And I confess, after work, I needed to break up a $20, so I bought some Herbal Essences and Aussie 3-Minute Miracle treatment at Wal*Mart. Just for good measure, I guess.

Now why didn't I title my journal "Just For Good Measure?" Hmmm....
   Well, because "Measure For Measure" is a not-so-obvious Shakespearean reference (yes, I'm a Shakespeare nut). Plus, my "life" is one big drama... so...yeah.

Anyway, I was able to reschedule my trim for tomorrow morning at the same time.  :)  All's well that ends well, I suppose.

10 Days of Pantene and what do I get? Greasy roots and fried ends! Ugh! It would be so much easier to just shave my head.  :o

Oh yeah...and I haven't had anything decent to eat all friggin' day. I'm frustrated.  >:( And now, I think I'm finally done complaining.

OH! heh Word is that the EEEEVIL, worthless, dæmonic, spawn of Satan villain of a roommate is moving out in [glb]2 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!![/glb] *wild, hysterical laughter*

What a sweet, sweet surprise :), though i don't think i would have been able to keep the blindfold on that long :P

When i did the pantene challenge last year, i got to day 4 or 5 and STOP didn't go on... terrible :P

That suprise is so sweet!  He definately sounds like a nice guy.  ;D

I don't have a problem with Pantene's formula...except for the SMELL.  It smells like a dumptruck, imho!

Beesan: Yeah it is a bit of a challenge...but well worth it. I just couldn't foil the surprise.  ;)

Panpeus: I agree, the Pantene fragrance isn't what it used to be. Actually, they've changed it many times over the years.
   I was in looooove with the old Pert Plus fragrance back when I was in high school. But they ruined it soon after I graduated. *sigh*

After 6 months of waiting, I finally got my trim done!  :D I do believe "scissor lady" took off way more than the inch I requested, however. I haven't had the chance to measure yet.

After weeks of starving, we finally went grocery shopping. We'll eat like kings...for a few days, at least.

I'm working in the morning tomorrow at my boyfriend's request. We're going to Disneyland again tomorrow, so he wants me to get out as soon as possible. Ohhhh this is gonna be fun!!  ;D

I really kind of enjoy the benefits of being with a plumber. Not only is my beloved planning to build my castle from the ground up, but today he brought home a new $80 showerhead for us to try out. He says that there are plenty more where this one came from if it doesn't work out. The one he wants costs about $300!  :o

Speaking of showers, I used the red Rainforest Flowers formulas again this morning. *sigh* I'm so wishy-washy these days, I can't stand it. Pantene. Herbal Essences. Pantene. Herbal Essences. It's messing with my head, man!! To think that I would devote so much of my conscious thought to such trivial things kind of bothers me.
   Tomorrow I get to try out the new shower head though.

I should be in bed by now....but I'm trying to comfort a friend who's been feeling down lately.  :-/ Hang in there, Adam. God loves you, and so do I.

Belated Happy Birthday!!  Hahah I can't believe you were able to sit in the car for 2 hours with a blindfold on!  What a nice sweety you have.  

Cynde

khrome: Just keep reading to see how "nice" he is!!

I am lonely and unhappy as crap today.  :(

My boyfriend hasn't spoken to me since Friday morning. I think I've seen him a total of 5 seconds in the past 3 days, and the past 3 nights I've spent alone.

We were planning to go to Disneyland on Friday afternoon. I had called my mother and arranged to work the morning shift that day (even though it meant going through commission payroll - ugh!) so I could be off by 12:30. But before I had even left for work, something happened. Truth is, I don't really even remember what. All I do remember is one of the last things he said before I had to leave: "Maybe you should just go to the park by yourself today. I'm gonna be busy."
   That is, he arranged to be busy. JERK.

He had brought home and installed a brand new $80 shower head that I guess he'd gotten from his work (he's a plumber). And this thing.........is bloody awful! It's about the worst shower head I've ever used in my entire life. SO not worth the $80 price tag!
   Although, I thought that the fact that he even has the kind of resources and skills to just bring something home and install it was kinda hot.  ;)
   But still, this thing completely sucks. We have very different tastes in shower heads, apparently. And most everything else for that matter... *sigh*

I vaguely remember making some comment about being very different people on Friday morning. He tried to counter with the old "if we were the same, our relationship would be boring" cliché. But I countered that by expaining the difference between different and incompatible. Maybe that's what upset him. *shrug* Who knows. I swear, that guy acts more like a woman than I do.

But 3 days of the old "silent treatment" is more than just a little immature for a grown man, if you ask me. Between that, his complete absence and a few other little details, it's as if his every gesture says, "I don't care anymore."
   Whatever. If that's the game he wants to play, then so be it. If this is the way he acted in other relationships, then it's really no wonder that none of them worked out.  :-/ Honestly.

I need a roommate!!!!

Ahem. In other news........
   I saw "Tristan & Isolde" last night (ALONE!  >:(). *swoon!* It was good. Sad, but good. Definitely some longhair moments!

This morning, sick of my hair routine for the past few days, I did the clarifying routine with Pantene Purity shampoo and a vinegar rinse. Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, as always. But no leave-ins today. I wanted to see & feel my hair in its purest form, to get an idea of the condition it's really in.

I've had to use that godawful shower head for the past 4 showers now, and it is NO FUN!!! I literally had to stand on a box the last time just to get close enough to it so the water would actually run through my hair.  :-/
   It's the type where the water comes out in a circular shape with nothing in the middle. The kind that most cheap hotels and apartments use. Not good for short, skinny gals like myself. I literally have to run around in the shower to get wet.  >:(
   And certainly not good for anyone who cherishes their hair!
   Note for future use: The type of shower head used has a strong impact on the condition of one's hair.

Anyway, I spent most of the day at work. In fact, that's where I am right now, seeing as I can no longer use the computer at home.

My boyfriend adjusted it so he is the only one who can. It's password protected. And though I tried countless times to guess it, I kept getting it wrong. And when I clicked on the password hint question icon, it said this: "Why don't you just go kill yourself?"
WTF, mate?!
   I don't know whether that's really his hint, or something he typed just for laughs or whether it's aimed directly at me. The latter part is what bothers me, obviously. Why on earth would he say something like that TO ME?!
   I thought about leaving a note on his desk that read: "Go kill myself? Who do you think I am....your cousin?!" A reference of course, to our lovely roommate's earlier unsuccessful suicide attempt. But I have no way of knowing whether that question was for me or not. *sigh*
 
Should I try to be the bigger person here and talk to him? It would feel weird. And if he doesn't care, why the @#&$% should I?

What the ***** is going on at your place? Is your BF always so hot and cold towards you? I know I can only go by your journal entries, but the situations with Disneyland and the computer are messed up. I hope that computer password "hint" is a joke (albeit a terrible one). But either way, that's totally uncalled for. >:(

I hope things get better, Angel Spun! (((hugs)))

Hmm, there are ways of finding out that password, you know...

Ever head of a keylogger?

Awwww AngelSpun!  Tomarrow is a new day.  Thats what i tell myself. ::) Hopefully things get better! Big hug to you.

Quote:

What the ***** is going on at your place?

Belive me, juri, I've wondered the same thing many a time...  :-/

Thanx for the support you guys. Now for an update:

My boyfriend apologized last night for being such an immature boob (I made him!) and we patched things up to a level that I'm at least functional at. You best believe, though, that I'm not done.

I came to learn 2 things yesterday:
1.) That it wasn't my boyfriend who messed with the computer after all! I should have known it was that no-good scoundrel roommate of ours! Grrrrrrrrr  >:(
   Thank goodness my boyfriend knew the password (the dæmon had told him). And like me, he doesn't know why his cousin decided to change the startup format in the first place, nor is he pleased by the fact.

2.) That my man is just as fond of that blasted new shower head as I am. I've cleaned the old one up and he'll be replacing it soon (thank the hair gods) but not soon enough.  >:(

Hair news: Today I tried out my free samples of Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo & conditioner. I washed twice, and left the conditioner in while I did all of the other stuff, then rinsed it out.
   The formula smells lovely...rather like green tea, but both the shampoo & conditioner are blue. They seemed to make my hair feel quite soft & light. Perhaps I'll post a full review later on when I have more time.
   I don't think I'll be switching permanently, though.

Anywho, the eeevil roommate will be gone by the 1st. This means that neither my boyfriend nor I will ever have to worry about him ruining our humble abode and disrupting our lives or our relationship.
   It also means that he & I will be solely responsible for rent from this point on. Thank goodness I put in overtime last week!

That's all for now. I have to work morning shift tomorrow and then off to job #2. heh Money, money, money!  ;D

I'm glad things got straightened out. And I'm sorry for jumping the gun and assuming things about what's going on with your BF! I think I'm going to refrain from making unneeded comments in the future. :-X

But...I'm happy for you that the daemon is moving out.

I'm glad everything has straightend out some.. :)

The computer thing is very...i can't seem to find the right word :P, but i'm very happy for your sake that he is moving out :)

thanx, juri & Beesan.

This morning I woke up after 6:30 without much time to get to work.  :o So I threw on yesterday's clothes, and my wool city coat because it was bloody cold outside, twisted my hair into a scrunchie bun and flew out the door unshowered.
   By the time my shift was over, I felt so gross that I didn't want to go to my 2nd job, or anywhere else for that matter, until I'd had a shower. It usually goes that way when I don't take one in the morning. I hate that feeling. Bleagh!  :P

Plus I was sick anyway, so when I finally came home, I first made a can of chicken soup for lunch, then made up a vinegar rinse and scrubbed out the bathtub, seeing as the dæmon was the last person in it. I could horrify you with tales of what he's left behind in there...

So I took a shower, did the usual clarifying routine with Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse and Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Hopefully this will be the last time I have to balance on that box before my sweetheart (grrrrrrrrrr) finally puts up the old shower head!!

Didn't use any leave-in sprays today either. I want to do an overnight treatment tonight, and I want it to absorb without anything in the way. A nice new start.

My roommate needs to go in the worst way!!  >:( I really can't express it enough. As I was drying off and putting my shower stuff back into its silver basket, I happened to notice one of his hairs stuck to the wall...right where my towel had been....and I don't mean the kind that grow on your head!!  :o  I literally felt as if I would vomit.

I really think that the 1st is not nearly soon enough. He should never have moved in with us at all. Even my boyfriend wants to kill him now.
   But oh man do we have our work cut out for us after he leaves! We're cleaning and restoring the whole apartment. I mean power washing the walls, steaming the carpets, painting, the whole 9.

One thing, perhaps I've never mentioned, is that I hate taking a shower while he's here & my boyfriend isn't. It just screams rape to me. Always has. It would be a joke to say that I trust that guy as far as I can throw him, because I suppose that I could throw him pretty far. I don't trust him at all.

Anyway, now I just sit and wait for my hair to dry. My dear beloved still isn't home yet.  :(

[glb]HAAAAAAAALELUJAH!!!![/glb]
My lover has finally fixed the shower head!  :D

Today I was able to use my Intensive Restoration Treatment after washing (just once) with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo.
   I left the treatment in for about 2 hours, then rinsed out. Then followed with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner and a nice cold rinse.
   I used all of my lovely leave-in sprays today as well. Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner, Daily Moisture Treatment and TRESemmé Detangling Leave-In Conditioner (just on the crown, mainly, but I'm still trying to finish off the bottle).
   When I got to work, I oiled my hair in the restroom before claiming my seat at the front desk. *sigh* The old grind...

Today a frazzled co-worker came by to vent about inventory and being the middle-man, but in the process, he actually offered my some pretty helpful tips pertaining to my upcoming (hopefully!) promotion. I'm still crossing my fingers where that's concerned.
   But he brought up 2 interesting points that I hadn't really considered before: 1.) that practically the entire company knows I want this promotion, and it would disappoint a lot of people if I didn't get it....and 2.) it will likely happen in March, at the end of the fiscal year. Apparently that's when most promotions/transfers take place.

I have 9 hours logged at my 2nd job so far, which is good considering that I now have to live off of my secondary income. The primary is now entirely going into rent because we will now be paying for it without the dæmon's "help."
   It's depressing to think that all the efforts of my 1st job are being wasted on this dump. I can't wait to get out of here, and neither can my boyfriend. Not only is it ridiculously expensive and not worth the cost, but there are a lot of other factors surrounding it that we are eager to leave behind.

It's kinda funny to think of all of the things that I will be accomplishing this year. So many "big" things that I'm already aware will happen.
   I'll be transferring to a different department at work, probably getting benefits, making more money than I ever have in my life, moving, getting my ears pierced a 2nd time, getting my tattoo...who knows what else? Not to mention, I'll be going to Disneyland many times through it all.  ;)

Tonight I got $80 for my old aquarium.  :D My boyfriend brought a co-worker over who was interested in buying it, and he did. So now I can finally do laundry...and put a little gas in my tank...and maybe have a little left over to aid with rent. Things are definitely looking up for me.

*sigh* I suppose I would be happier if I had more to show for it already.  :-/

Yesterday I worked the morning shift, so I didnt have much time to do anything to my hair. But at least I had time for a shower!

I've been having the urge to wear makeup lately, but I can't due to being so ill lately. Wearing makeup when I must blow my nose every 30 seconds is pointless.

Last night I did 5 loads of laundry before my body finally gave out at around midnight. We live on the 2nd floor and the laundry room is on the ground floor, so...many trips up and down the stairs. Good for the thighs.

My boyfriend interrupted me in the middle of laundry & whisked me away to the grocery store, where we more than replaced the $80 worth (of my own b-day money) that his dæmon cousin had already eaten. I swear, that guy has put on so much weight since he's been living with us...
   *sigh* He'll soon be someone else's problem.

This morning, I waited for him to leave before jumping into the shower. I carry my shampoo, conditioner, bodywash, facewash and other things in a silver metal basket so I can take them in & out of the bathroom with me, so the eeeeeeeeevil one doesn't use them. He's been known to use my things in the past & I totally do not appreciate it. It's just rude.
    Plus, the things that he's "borrowed" were quite expensive & high-quality. I either paid a lot for them or they were gifts from beloved family. Either way, his skanky hands aren't even worthy to touch them.
   But in a few days, I'll have to find a new use for that silver basket. With the seed of Satan expelled from my life, I'll be able to leave my stuff in the bathroom where it belongs once again, knowing that it will be safe.

Today I washed once with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo. Ahhhh that scent. I just can't stay away!
   I left Pantene's Intensive Moisturizing Mask in for an hour, then rinsed and followed with Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner. Ahhhhh...
   Then I used Herbal Essences & TRESemmé leave-ins. The latter of which will soon be gone - haha! Detangled with the usual RS #45. My hair actually still smells like Pantene.  :-/ Oh well.

Today I'm wearing my new Nightmare Before Christmas hooded shirt that I got at the Bat En Rouge during my b-day trip to Disneyland.  :D It's cute. It has black glitter on the front...and pink roses in the design. I think I'm going to wear my pink velour scrunchie to match them  :o See if anyone notices...

Anyway, I'm off to work as soon as I finish my green tea & throw my boots on. Peace out.

Not much to add tonight.

I've discovered that it's easier to take all 3 of my daily Biotin tablets at once, rather than 1 with every meal.

The Pantene website has now begun promoting the Restoratives lines. And wouldn't you know it...the model that they use for the Breakage Defense collection has straight, light brown hair just like me!!  :D It's literally exactly the same colour...with the subtle red hints & everything! Now this is what I like to see! We light brunettes need more recognition!  ;)  http://www.pantene.com/en_US/products/collection/restoratives/index.jsp

I forgot to mention that yesterday I clipped a pedometer to my waistband and left it on until last night, just to see how much walking I do in a typical day.
   It didn't really surprise me when I took it off that the final reading was just under 10 miles. *sigh*

On that note, I'm going to bed. Like all the ones before it, this has been one heck of a week! Now it's time to end all of that torture with a satin pillowcase and sweet Pantene dreams.

Goodnight, all.

My boyfriend ended up working all night. He finally crashed on the couch at around midnight (I'm guessing). Didn't even bother to tell me that he was home, so I slept alone. Again.
   This morning, he's on yet another call. I really can't hang with this. It's not a "relationship." It's not anything.

I coughed most of the night and most of the morning when I woke up. The build-up is still not out of my chest. I honestly don't think it ever will be until I see a doctor.  :(

The webpage history was deleted this morning, which means that the dæmon was looking at porn again sometime yesterday. Lord, he disgusts me in every way possible (and even invented a few new ways, I'm sure). He truly represents everything I hate about men.
   After I finish typing this, I'm going to shut the computer down and clean everything. The mouse, the keyboards, the buttons, everything.

I've been finding more and more of his hairs in unexpected places, too. I can only imagine what I might find when we finally get down to cleaning out his old room. *shudder*

Anyway, today I washed twice with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo and then put in the Intensive Moisturizing Mask, which I'm leaving in for an hour while I do other things.
 
The sky was pretty earlier this morning. Painted in pale, muted shades of blue, gray and white, with the glow of distant sunlight in the northeast.
   I love winter. The air is so clear and frigid and delicate, and the sky...and the frost...I love everything about it. There is truly no other season that I would rather have been born in.

Breakfast this morn is peaches & cream oatmeal & green tea. We're out of water.  :(  I need to call my father & exchange bottles.

I think I'd like to buy a few full-size bottles of Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense. Of course that probably won't happen anytime soon. Yesterday's check is going straight into rent, and February's income will go into 2 birthdays, Valentine's Day...and rent.  >:(  I hate this. There's never anything left over for ME. A girl's gotta live.

Anyway, I'm shutting down to clean now. Then I'm going to rinse this treatment out of my hair and follow with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Good ol' Winter Rescue. God knows that food and whatever cleanliness I generate may be the only sources of happiness I have left.
 

Hi, Angel Spun.  For your cough, try taking a teaspoon of honey mixed with 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon.  I put the honey on a spoon (I eyeball it 'cause its such a pain to get honey out of a plastic measuring spoon) and sprinkle the cinnamon on top.  You can take it several times a day.

Sleeping propped up will also help w/the cough at night-the drainage doesn't have a chance to sit in the throat and irritate it.

Feel better soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, yes, I second that honey motion...works like a charm when I have a cough, so very *soothing*, ahhhhh.  And cinnamon, how could you go wrong, it's the most wonderful spice on earth (to me, anyway...loooove the cinnamon!).  Another thing you can be doing to help yourself is to totally avoid any dairy products, creates nothing but mucous...bleagh!

I'm so glad to here that your daemon spawn of hell will be finding a new lair to dwell in...or has he gone already?  Hopefully for your sake he has!

Have you tried the Pantene Winter Protection line yet?  I think that I might try that next.  I flip flop between Pantene & Herbal Essences, too.  I just finished up the last of the HE yesterday, it was something lavender colored with palm oil.  It was good, but the oil was a little too heavy to use on my hair everyday, so I had to keep switching.  I'll try a different kind this time, but I do agree that it does smell *heavenly*.

Just wanted to mention that I'm a big fan & somewhat of a collector of Nightmare Before Christmas, your jacket sounds really cool.  I say only somewhat of a collector, well, because I can't really afford the hobby of being a collector, so we just pick up the things we "have to have".  I just like Tim Burton's style in general, very unique and creative.

BTW- good luck on the promotion, hope you get it!  ;D

Angelspun, i hope you get better. I understand how it feels to be sick.hopefully that cough will go away soon. you cant go wrong with honey and tea.

Thanx so much, Sakina, Magz & Curly Girl! Your well wishes mean so much.  :)

The cough is slowly and gradually tapering off. I have generally been avoiding dairy products, but anything that I eat triggers mucous build-up. Unfortunately, these are just the kind of sinuses I inherited through the miracle of genetics and must live with.  ::)

I tried the honey & cinnamon too, and it's good, although a little tricky when trying to lick it out of a soup ladel.  :-/  We don't have any clean spoons at the moment...we go through them faster now because we suddenly don't have as many as we used to for some (evil) unknown (dæmon) reason (roommate).  :P
   I have always used honey when I had a cough/sore throat, but never tried it with cinnamon in it before.

My boyfriend was home for maybe a total of 2 seconds during the weekend due to all of the calls he was getting. As if his chronic absence didn't put enough of a strain on the "relationship" already, this on-call business doesn't help matters. Luckily (luckily?), I'm pretty used to it by now. *shrug* I did always want to live alone...

All of this working is taking a serious toll on both of us. We are always tired, he's always aching and I'm more on-edge now than I have been in a long time. The stress just keeps building up.  :(

Sorry to disappoint, Magz, but the seed of Satan has not yet disappeared from our lives.  >:( He still sleeps here at night...at least when he isn't spending the night with his new (and enormous) "girlfriend" from class. Yet another blonde...  ::)

For as much as I loathe and detest men, I can't say that I understand women any better. Especially the kind who willingly tolerate and even welcome the company of such a person as my roommate. Seriously, what is up with that?!  ???
   I suspect that they must either be completely desperate, just don't care, or both.

*ahem* In any case, it is now only a matter of days before he and all of his disreputable habits are no longer any problem of mine...and I thank God for that!

Alright...in HAIR news......

Today, I washed once with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, rinsed with cool water, did a vinegar rinse, rinsed with cool water, washed again with Herbal Essences Moisture-Balancing shampoo and rinsed with cool water. Then, I worked Herbal Essences Moisturizing conditioner through my hair, tucked it under a shower cap while tending to my other "shower duties," and then rinsed with cold water when I was done.
   After spraying it down with Herbal Essences and TRESemmé leave-in's, my hair was easily detangled. Before it dried completely, I spritzed the ends with a mixture of olive oil and water. This still has not yet absorbed into my hair.  :-/

*sigh* I just don't know. I keep fence-hopping on the side of either Herbal Essences or Pantene on a whim. A few days into one, I'll long for the other. It's a vicious cycle, and my hair (and skin!) are tiring of the indecision...not to mention all of these clarifying washes and vinegar rinses! It's like pick one, already!! Man...I am beginning to annoy myself!
   The more obvious choice for me is Herbal Essences, but for some reason, I just can't seem to make myself stick with it. TSK! I'm a shampoo 2-timer!!  ::)

Magz: I have been using the Pantene Winter Rescue formulas for years, actually. I can almost hear you asking, "Years? But that's impossible! Winter Rescue is new....isn't it?" And actually, no, it's not. All "Winter Rescue" is is the same old Daily Moisture Renewal line that they've always had out, which I have probably been using for about 4 or 5 years now. Give or take.
   If your hair likes cones, it will love Winter Resc-- er, I mean Daily Moisture Renewal products.  ;D

Anyway, I think that this entry is long enough, and I must retire early, being that I have the morning shift tomorrow.  :(

Peace out.

You make me laugh, angel spun, your hatred for your life-sucking, eeevil, misery-inducing roommate goes so deep that there's nothing left to do but laugh, honestly!  And pair that up with an enormous blonde, now that's just off the charts, we're talking sitcom material!

So those little buggers at Pantene just put a snowflake on the DMR bottle and called it new, huh?  How dare they do that to me, I almost fell for it...but I'll still probably buy it for the pretty snowflake  :P

As far as being a flip flopping, two timing shampoo user, I say embrace it, don't try to change it...you deserve shower choices just as much as the next gal, probably even more.  I always have (at least) two to choose from, I think it's good to change it up, then your hair won't get bored with the same ol'-same ol', right?  Right.  Good.  ;)

Today I washed twice with Herbal Essences Moisture-Balancing shampoo and conditioned with the matching conditioner. As I told my boyfriend this morning, I'm rather liking this Herbal Essences thing. If it works out on a permanent basis, great! But we'll see...

A sitcom, Magz? Now there's an idea. I had a girlfriend tell me while ago that I should sell my story to Days Of Our Lives.  ;D  I'm somewhat grateful that all of my misfortune can at least be comedic to someone else. If someone can laugh or learn something by watching me, that almost makes it worth it.  :P
   But you really should see the new chick that this clown is trying to impregnate. She darn near shook the whole building just by walking down the stairs (we live on the 2nd floor), which prompted my boyfriend to lean over to me and discreetly whisper, "That's a large woman!"
   To which I of course sneered and whispered back, "That's all he can get!"

On the subject of Sir Skanxalot, it is the last day of the month and his stuff is still not entirely out of his old room yet. He said that he would be out by tomorrow. Bloody cad, now I can add LIAR to the list of his "subtle imperfections."  :-/  Oy, I can honestly say that I have never met a bigger moron in my life. And that says a lot considering where I went to high school.

*ahem* Yes...Herbal Essences. I love the fragrance, and I love how my hair actually feels clean after washing it. It's cheaper than Pantene, but doesn't offer any treatments (anymore - grrrr). So I don't know. I never used to be this indecisive. But Maggie's right, I do like having both options available to me, depending on my ever-changing moods. I wouldn't say I deserve them, but I like having them around.  ;D

Today I went to Wal*Mart (UGHHHH!!!) after work and bought bodywash. Ha! At least I'm decided on something! I always use Dial bodywash - love it!! This time, I bought the cucumber & yogurt formula in hopes that the cream formula will help my dry, itchy skin.  :(  I hate SoCal Santa Ana weather! I hate SoCal in general.  :(

My mother informed me today at work that the department I hope to transfer into may not be hiring a replacement for the gal that's leaving. This basically means that my "promotion" may not happen after all.
   I know that my mother tries to be as negative as possible about it (part of her doesn't want me to transfer because it would inconvenience her), but I know that if there is only one slot open after all, I almost surely will not get it.  :(  I'll be doomed to stay the "Rock & Roll Receptionist" a little longer.

Well, time to get some more laundry done.

Hang in there, Angel, don't rule out the promotion just quite yet.  It's not over 'til it's over, so keep positive.  And if not, a rock 'n roll receptionist sounds kinda cool, and if it's not, then you'll make it cool, that's all  ;)!

...So, did you say ol' scratch there is trying to impregnate big blonde lady??  *shivers*

[glb]HE'S GONE!!! HE'S GONE!!!! HE'S GOOOOOOONNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!![/glb]

*wild, hysterical laugher*

Wooooooooooohooooooooooooo!!!!!

That mangey, reprehensible, pathetic excuse for a human being EX-roommate of ours has vanished from our lives forever. HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!!!

A new day, a new month, a new moon, a new start.
   Today, I woke up without having to worry whether the devil himself was in my bathroom already or planning to be. I got up when I wanted to and just went right in. Brushed out my hair & took a shower without a care. I can't even remember the last time I was able to do that.
 
Surrendering to the power of Pantene, I did a clarifying wash with Purity shampoo and then did a vinegar rinse. Then followed with Daily Moisture Renewal (aka: Winter Rescue) shampoo and finished off with the Intensive Moisturizing Mask.
   After leaving that in for well over an hour, I rinsed it out and followed with the DMR (Winter Rescue) conditioner. Ahhhhhhh.... much better.

I flipped up new pages on both of our wall calendars today. I like being greeted by new pictures.
   Wednesday. What more gothly day for a new start? Except, of course, for Friday the 13th.  ;)

I finally ran out of TRESemmé Detangle leave-in conditioner yesterday (yay!), so today my only leave-in's were Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment. To quote a cheesy, old radio commercial, "That, my friends, is a smooth finish."

I'm in a weird mood. Have been since about last night & I have no idea why. Maybe all of this shampoo-switching has finally taken its toll. Or maybe it's some kind of misguided euphoric reaction to the dæmon's permanent absence.

He still has a few things here that he forgot to take with him. I might throw them into a bag & send it with my boyfriend when he goes to take his cousin's bike to him.

I plan on wearing my hair down today so I can measure it. Not expecting any difference from the last time I measured, shortly after my trim.
   I need to adjust my ticker. *sigh* That 24-inch mark is a long way off yet.  :(

Anyway, have to make lunch & head off to work. Peace.

Congrats on having your place back to yourselves!  Changing the locks my give you even more "security" that he won't be back uninvited.   8)  ;D

Enjoy!  :D

Magz: Your encouragement is totally appreciated, girl! All of that optimism appears to have paid off.  :D
   I've just learned that another gal in the department that I hope to transfer to just gave her 2 week notice. She's leaving to put her efforts into her 2nd job and being a stay-home mom, which leaves another opening...hopefully for me. *crosses fingers* Here's hoping.

BB: Thanx. It is great for it to be just the 2 of us again. But I'm afraid the locks are the managers' responsibilities...and they're both broke. Plus, they wouldn't put out that much effort just for one door on one apartment.
   But we are taking the dæmon's key.

I measured my hair when I got home from work today. 20 ¼ inches...that's a quarter inch of growth in just 13 days!  :D Needless to say, I am pretty stoked to see what next years measurement will be.

Anyway, I forgot the rest of what I was going to write (I really should take notes during the day so I don't forget).  :-/ So I think I'll just fix my ticker & shut up.  ;D Y'all have a good night.

http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/huepfen/jumping-smiley-011.gif http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/huepfen/jumping-smiley-011.gif http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/huepfen/jumping-smiley-011.gif   CONGRATULATIONS!!!   http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/huepfen/jumping-smiley-011.gif http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/huepfen/jumping-smiley-011.gif http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/huepfen/jumping-smiley-011.gif

Maybe the the leftover evil vibes from the daemon spawn's left-behind items that are making you in a wierd mood.  You need to cleanse your place of him, you'll have to get some sage bundles and do you entire apartment!  I'm so happy for you! ;D  Just remember that good things happen in three's...so I'm sure that your new job position will be part of that, I'm sending my good vibes clear across the states for you!!!

YAYYYYY!!!!!!!!! [glb]CONGRATS[/glb] :) :) :D :D

I'm so happy for you ;D

Thanx, you guys.  ;D

OMG Maggie, those jumping firebals...LOL!!

Went to Disneyland last night. It sucked.  >:(
   First of all, we left way too late in the evening, and ended up pulling off of the freeway a few times to look for a place to eat. We finally had dinner at a Del Taco down the street from the park...saved $$ that way.
   My boyfriend got lost trying to find the parking structure, which is some distance away from the park and you must take a tram to get there & back.
   By the time we reached the main gates, the park was only going to be open for about another hour....and the lines were still like 3 miles long!!!!  :o  Had to wait forever.
   Even though my favourite ride (the Haunted Mansion, duh) was closed, I was still excited to think of all the Nightmare Before Christmas stuff I would get from the Bat En Rouge. But after rummaging around in my purse, I was horrified to learn that I had accidentally left (or dropped) my wallet in the car!  >:(
   My boyfriend said that I probably still had my debit card in my purse, though. So I looked...and I did!! I was so happy that I threw my arms around him & kissed him.
And then I realized that my ID was still in my wallet! My boyfriend said that if we tried to go back for it, the park would be closed by the time we returned. So I bought nothing.  :(
   We went on 1 measely ride (Pirates Of The Carribean) and saw the last 30 seconds of Fantasmic, and then left the park to wander Downtown Disney. I was finally able to pull him into Illuminations (candle store).  ;)  I showed him my favourite restaurants in that area, then we walked into the area between the Disneyland Hotel buildings.
   I led him down into the area he loved so much last time where giant waterfalls surround you with beautiful coloured lights flashing up onto them. He complained that all of that rushing water made him have to *ahem* [use the facilities].  :-/
   Then we went up to the koi ponds nearby. I love koi fish! We were leaning over the railings to look at them, and I was going on & on about how cute they were, when from out of nowhere, my boyfriend said, "You know they'll eat your spit."
Taken aback, I said, "WHAT?!"
   And then, he hocked a loogie right into the koi pond!!!!!!!!  :o .......and they ate it!!!!!!!!!  :o I was horrified, and exclaimed "That is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen!" (even though it probably wasn't)
   He just shrugged & said, "Told ya."

We left soon after that, and of course, I had to drive the 2 hours home.  :(  My mind, body and nerves are hardwired against falling asleep at the wheel. It's impossible for me to do. But I had to fight off the urge all the same. It was about 12:30 am when we finally got to bed.

This morning, he broke my heart again.  :'(  Not only did he have to take off early to do a side job with his father, but he insulted me in a very personal manner, once again making me feel "not good enough." I laid in bed for at least an hour after he left, crying my eyes out and feeling heavy and miserable as heck.  :'(

I'm still not over it, nor do I suppose I ever will be. But life goes on. For the moment, I'm doing a hair masque treatment which I will rinse out very soon. Then I'm heading out to my hometown in East County to shop. There are a lot of things that we/I need, and shopping is good therapy for a woman's ailing heart.
   I do all of my shopping in East County because the local stores are absolute ghetto crap. Plus, it gives me the opportunity to "get back to my roots," as they say. Remember who I am, where I came from & all that jazz.

Hair: I'm going to try and pick up some Pantene Restoratives products today, in addition to new treatments.
   Today, as I was applying my hair masque, some water got into the jar, so I tried shaking it out...and half of its contents fell out in the shower!  :o  >:(  For like 10 seconds, I just stood there completely aghast before figuring that I would just replace it.  :-/

So, great way to start the day (yes, I know that rhymed & is extremely cheesy...I am ashamed). But like I've always said, just because the day is ruined doesn't mean that the night has to be.  ;)

God only knows what time that jerk got home last night. I was already asleep.
   He crashed on the couch, and I slept alone. Again.

This morning, while I was in the shower, he barged right in and demaned to know whom I was cheating on him with!!  :o >:(  The nerve!
   First he asked if it was my former husband, then he asked if it was his dæmon cousin!! I answered sarcastically...I didn't know what else to do. I'm insulted. If anything, I should be asking him who he's cheating with. I spent the night at home!  >:(

I've pretty much written him off. I can't take this anymore.  :-/

This morning, I clarified and then used Pantene Restoratives: Breakage Defense shampoo - ahh that pretty cornflower blue...and the fragrance!
   Then I left the Intensive Moisturizing Mask in for just over an hour, rinsed out, and followed with the Breakage Defense conditioner. Finished with Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment. My hair is happy...for the moment.

I'm liking the Restoratives line...which is a good thing, considering I bought the full size S&C yesterday. If nothing else, they can help me adjust to using much fewer cones! I like the light, clean, soft feeling that it leaves my hair with.

Last night, I got a 2nd hole in each ear. Finally. I've wanted them pierced that way for awhile. I'm not crazy about the placement of said holes, however. For one, they are too low. For two, they're much further from the 1st holes than I was expecting. They don't line up with the 1st holes well at all. For 3, they are slightly uneven.
   Right now, I figure I'll just wait awhile & see if I get used to them. If not, I'll remove them in a few weeks and maybe try again next year. Ideally, I'd like to have 3 on each side.

Today, I went to the store & had my prescription refilled - finally!! While there, I also picked up a new spray bottle, a new cherry Chapstick and a bottle of Curél shea butter & honey lotion. Mmmmm....
   I still have a little of the fragrance-free formula left over, but perhaps I'll save that for when I get my tattoo.

When I came home, my jerk "boyfriend" was gone. Either to one of his buddy's places to drink, smoke & watch the Stupid Bowl or on a call. I don't really care which. I've said it before...if he's not going to act like my boyfriend, I'm not going to act like his girlfriend.

I've been daydreaming all afternoon about meeting a beautiful Christian punk & falling in love. *giggle* We'll see...

OMG today while I was at the pharmacy, I was walking down an aisle with a security camera pointed at it and the monitor displayed on a pole. In the monitor, I caught the image of a svelte female frame with long legs, clad in all black, with long, straight, brown hair walking the same direction as me. I thought to myself, "Wow, she's pretty! I wonder who she is and where..." That was when I realized that I was walking in front of the security camera...and the image upon the monitor was my own.  :-[  Rather an egocentric moment...checking myself out! lol But the camera was behind me & all I could see was the backside. The hair looked alright.  ;D

Anyway, I've recently come to realize that all I've eaten today are potato chips & popcorn.  :-/  I know that's bad. I'll try to fix that tomorrow.

I wish I had someone true & wonderful...who actually wanted to hang out & do things with me. *sigh*

Angle Spun...
Where on earth did you get your ears pierced?  Is there a chance you can get your money back?  My (unsolicited) advice is to take those out, let them heal and go to a place that ONLY does piercings.  Get them re-pierced the right way and tell them that you intend to add more ear piercings in the future so you'll get the placement you want!

Sorry to hear about your lousy unboyfriend.  Until you believe you deserve better, nothing will change.  It is good to dream, and dream big but if you accept scraps...scraps you will get.

Thats really funny about the camera.

Be the person you want to hang out with and "he" will appear, then re-read paragraph #2

I second Sakina in a couple of ways, first one being "paragraph two", Amen!  

Secondly about going to a piercing shop instead of the mall.  Did they use a gun on you?  If they did, that's bad bad bad!  There is no way to sterilize those guns, they can't be autoclaved, and they are a major spreader of disease and viruses - like hepatitis.  At least at a piercing shop they will use single use sterile needles on you, and if it is a reputable shop, it is MUCH more sanitary.  Sorry, don't mean to be preachy, I just wouldn't want you to contract anything from some scumbag cuz they used a dirty gun on you!  Just the thought...are the holes far enough apart to fit one in between?  Or are they an awkward kind of spacing?

Thank you kindly, Sakina and Maggie, for your advice and support. I am happy to report that things seem to be getting better...

Ears: Yes, they were done at the mall, and yes, they used a gun.  :(  It was a spontaneous decision done totally on the fly, and I regret it.
   I have since removed the earrings (which in itself was extremely difficult), cleaned & dressed the new holes and am currently waiting for them to close up. There is no infection, and they will heal completely.
   There was no room to place another piercing between these and the 1st, nor behind them. After removing the earrings, my anger only grew, because I could see for the first time just how terribly misplaced they were. They even messed up on the left side!  >:(  From that point on, I swore off getting anymore piercings at the mall, given that this was only one of several botched attempts.
   Next time, I will go to a piercing specialist, like I had wanted to from the beginning.
   Sidenote: My very first set of holes was done at a local swap meet when I was 11 years old, using 2 guns at once, and I have never had any problems with them.

Unfortunately, I don't think there's any way to get my $$ back.  :'(

Work: Today was probably the most hectic it's ever been in my 9 months of service. To intensify matters, both the Director and Manager of Human Resources came down from corporate headquarters to our location.  :o
   Being that these are the people who decide who gets hired, fired, promoted, etc., I had wanted to dress up & try to make an impression. And I did...just not the impression that I was trying to make!  :-/  I was running late, there was heavy traffic and they were all standing at the door waiting for me to open up the office when I finally arrived.  :-[  I ended up clocking in only 1 minute early...which isn't good. But I tried to assist them as best I could while holding down the rest of the fort at the same time.
   About an hour before I had to leave, my (hopeful) future boss walked in and said that he would like to interview me for the promotional position tomorrow!!!!!  :o  :D  As he walked away, my heart was pounding in my throat, and I almost felt nautious. The idea that this might actually happen thrills and scares me to death at the same time. *nervous gulp* We'll see...

Meanwhile: My boyfriend & I have patched things up...again. Turns out he didn't mean what he said to insult me so personally...and he knows full well that I'm faithful. He's not used to that.  :(
   Tonight I'm going out with the family for my sister's birthday dinner. Her birthday was actually yesterday, but she had to work most of the night.  :-/
   I still haven't gotten her present yet, so I need to take off....

Hair: I'm not sure about Pantene Restoratives. The conditioner burns & seems to dry my neck out. Ugh. Will I ever find the right formulas? *sigh*

Anywho, I'll write more when I have more time. Maybe tomorrow...the big interview. Egad!  :P

So today's the big day!!!  Is there a promotion in your future?!  I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!  ;D

Sounds similar to a job I worked years ago, I started as just an account manager, then was eventually promoted to manager...I can remember the terrible stress of the promotion interview & evaluation.  When you say that you're so nervous that you feel nauseous, I can completely empathize.  Just remember to stay cool & confident (sounds like a deodorant!  :-/), and remember that you rock, so there's no doubt that you're the gal for the job!

That's too bad about the Restoratives line, sounds like you have sensitive skin  ???  But I'm glad to hear that things are peaceful on the homefront again, I hope it will stay that way for you guys, at least for long stretches at a time...nothing can be good all the time!

Good luck & let us know how you do!!!     http://www.smiliegenerator.de/s29/smilies-22093.png

Good Luck, Angel Spun!

Don't worry about yesterday.  Although it wasn't the best day to run late, it happens and people who get to "higher up" positions know this.  Just be yourself and you'll be fine!!

ohhh, that's too bad about the piercing. i got mine done at Claire's, a few days after i looked closer and they weren't even :( it's not so noticeable though.... i got my first ones when i was 15 days old, my mom just couldn't wait :P :)

Anyway, good luck on the interview today :-* YOU CAN DO IT! :D :D Glad to hear that things are good between you guys, i hope they stay that way

Again good luck :)

Didja gettit?  Didja gettit?  Didja gettit?  Didja gettit?  Didja gettit?

We're WAITING!  Curious minds need to know - did you get the job?

lol Maggie, you are so cute, I could just kiss you.  :-* Er...on the cheek, of course!  ;D  hehe

Thank you guys sooo much for all of the support: you rock!!

This week has been completely insane. I've been constantly attacked from every angle imaginable (work, family, finances, relationship, etc.) and the overwhelming levels of stress from each are all taking a collective toll...which is why I haven't posted much lately. I am completely whooped at the moment.

There were huge adventures surrounding my sister's birthday, the visit from HR, the crazy workload at the office, my ever-changing financial demands & stablity (or lack thereof), my boyfriend's work schedule, and the biggest interview of my life to date. I won't go into detail on each...mostly because I'd be typing for a week, and partly because the majority of it is in the past now...thank God.

I will say that the interview went alright. It was neither good nor bad, but it was extremely thought-provoking. The manager who interviewed me said that he would be making a decision in a few weeks.
   What bothers me now is the fact that he's looking for someone to fill the position on a long-term basis.

If I accept the position, it means that I've signed onto it for a minimum of 5 years. Due to the mass amounts of knowledge and experience that the position requires, it would be pointless to do it for any less amount of time.
   So, needless to say, it requires that I stay where I am, should it go through. Which is why, I hate to say, I'm actually kind of hoping now that it doesn't.  :(  Yes, I realize that it seems rather a waste to get so psyched up at first for a position that I now almost do not wish to have...but it would be an even bigger waste to go through such extensive training only to be in the position for a year.

The thing is, I'm not sure how long I'm actually going to stay in San Diego. From the time I was about 13, it's been my dream and lifelong ambition to move to WA state.
   My former husband eventually did not wish to move, so I sacrificed for him. I'm not sacrificing anymore, period. But now, I finally have someone who is willing to make the move north with me, and idealistically, we would like to do so within the next few years.
   When I was in high school, my plan was to finish 2 years of junior college and then transfer to a WA university by age 20. I am already 6 years late...

In any case, accepting this position (if I'm chosen for it), will mean that I will once again have to put my dreams on hold and focus on the smaller things here and now. I've been doing this far too long. For once, I'd like to do something to move myself in the right direction.

The manager said that it "looks good" for me, but added also that there are a lot of applicants, and many of them have much more experience in the field than I do.

So I am torn. One way guarantees immediate success and indefinite confinement. The other way allows for freedom, but makes no guarantees for success. I guess I'll just have to see what he decides. It sucks that the fate of my life hangs on someone else's decision.  :-/  But...c'est la vie.

I believe most of all in integrity. If someone else is more qualified for the position and knows that they will be sticking around for more than a year, then the offer should absolutely go to them. I want what's best for the manager, the department and the company, whom I have all come to love. If they decide on someone else, I will only be happy and grateful because they will succeed and I will still be able to pursue my dream.

So that's where it stands. I leave the rest up to God.

The eeevil dæmon roommate finally came to remove most of his leftover things from his old room. Though we still have some unfinished business with him.

In hair news......I finally bought a new jar of Pantene DMR Intensive Moisturizing Mask after accidentally dumping half the contents of the current jar out in the shower (oops).  :P

The chemical burn from Pantene Restoratives has become pretty severe, though I cannot figure out what's causing it. I have the very same reaction from Herbal Essences, but upon reading the ingredients for HE, Restoratives and DMR (which works for me), I can find no major differences between them. The base ingredients are similar and in the same order. I suppose it's just the amounts of each and how they all work together.  ???

Last night, I bought lots of DMR 2 in 1 and conditioner. I figure this is the formulation which has brought me the most success thus far. If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

I also learned that baby shampoo is extremely drying! I shall never use it again.

It's kind of metaphoric, in a way. I try veering off of the beaten path, experimenting with this and that, only to realize that I had it right to begin with. Like "The Wizard Of Oz": If you don't find it in your own backyard, then you never really lost it to begin with.
   An invaluable lesson, whether you do it with shampoo, religion, the "religion of hair," or something else.  ;D  The point is that you learn something in the end...even if it's something you already knew. Has a way of reaffirming your convictions & all that jazz.

Well now I'm rambling. I usually don't start waxing philosophical until the wee hours & I'm very tired. Well....I am very tired. But I'm shutting up now. Tomorrow will be a "hair day." Until then.....

peace out!

Sorry you are dealing with so many stresses.  I will keep you in my thoughts and hope everything works out to make you happy.

Thanx, bikerbraid. You're a doll!  :-*

FINALLY!!! The weekend has arrived...and not a moment too soon!

So why on earth am I still up at 12:30 posting messages when I should be resting my weary nerves? That's a good question.  ???

Today was payday - woohoo! Finally, I get a little $$ to play with!  ;D  I seem to be comfortably coming to terms with either possible outcome of my promotion interview. If I get it, cool. If I don't, cool. Either way works for me.

Yesterday, a friend of mine from a different message board said that she would call me tonight...so I spent the entire day psyched.  :D  We had never talked over the phone before.
   When "tonight" finally rolled around, the inevitable nervousness & anxiety took over...especially when she asked if I was ready. My phone rang...and the two of us spent the next 2 hours talking like old friends. It was great. To have so much in common with someone else as we have is an uncanny coincidence...and a divine blessing. I love you, Carrie!  ;D

In hair news, I washed once with Pantene DMR 2 in 1 this morning, then followed with an hour-long Intensive Moisturizing Mask treatment.
   I've been trying to use colder water on my hair. That really seems to help with body, shine, texture, etc. The dead-cold winter air has made cold water rinsing almost unbearable, and I'll admit, there were some mornings that I just used lukewarm water instead.  :o  Son of a gun, oh the humanity...
   But I'm coming around to cold water again. I suppose it's worth the temporary discomfort. I rather wish we had one temperature control knob in the shower instead of two, though. Would make things so much easier...

Anyway, after rinsing out the hair mask, I followed with Pantene DMR conditioner. Leave-in's were the usual Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment. No oil today...or yesterday...or the day before that.  :-/  I'm not liking all of this laziness.

My hair felt great today, but smelled weird. Maybe it's the fact that I haven't clarified between all of this "product-hopping" that I've done lately. Maybe I'll do that tomorrow: mix up a vinegar rinse, drag my Pantene Purity shampoo out from under the sink & have at it.

My neck is still royally parched from the chemical burn. I think Maggie may be onto something about my having "sensitive skin," which is funny to me. Up until recently, my skin was very tough. I could wear old Christmas ornaments as earrings without any irritation whatsoever.  :P
   Now, my skin seems to have very particular "preferences." My ears have become quite intolerant of stainless/surgical steel over the years, so now I have to be careful about what sort of earrings I put in them & how long I wear them.
   I can no longer use Herbal Essences or the like. My skin is fine with the Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal line, however. It's all very strange. *shrug* Hormones, perhaps?

Anyway, my uber-goth blackberry-coloured lipgloss has bled & faded so drastically that I now resemble The Joker. So I'm off to wash my face & finally get to bed.
   My boyfriend has side work tomorrow, so I'll have the whole day to do whatever I wish... *grimmace & wicked laugh....fade to black*

This weekend has gone smoothly, although rather boring. My boyfriend has been out working the entire time, either on side jobs or with friends, so I've been on my own to do as I will.
   Yesterday I clarified, using Pantene Purity shampoo (twice) and a vinegar rinse. Fresh new start.
   Today, I washed twice with Pantene DMR 2 in 1 and put in the Intensive Moisturizing Mask. I don't know when I'll rinse it out.

I've pretty much just been trying to take it easy, which is necessary after the week I had. I need to not do anything for a change. Just take care of myself and my hair, and sleep whenever I freaking feel like it.  ;D  I want to go back to work tomorrow fresh and revived.

Last night I ordered a TON of stuff for my bedroom. Finally put that $200 from my grandparents to use...and then some!

Today, I also jumped back on the meds. 'Bout freaking time. Body is starting to come unglued again. Oy.
   But I'll be myself again shortly.

That's about it for now. Nothing major to report. Thank goodness.

Peace out.

Just like a ping-pong ball.  :-/  I'm back on Herbal Essences. Speaking of which, has anyone else ever smelled the inside of a ping-pong ball?  :P

Anywho, today I did a clarifying wash with Herbal Essences Clarifying (duh) shampoo and a vinegar rinse. Followed with Herbal Essences Moisturizing (yellow) conditioner and the Leave-In Conditioner. I sprayed the usual baby oil mixture onto the ends & combed through with my RS #32. So far, so good.

It's been cloudy and cold for the past 2 days now. I am loving it...even if it's just a tease. Right now it's doing the cloudy, sunny, cloudy, sunny thing. The chill in the air and the wind patterns are behaving as if a storm is close by or fast approaching. I'm keeping my fingers crossed just in case.
   It would be a grave understatement to say that I love the rain, for it is literally a part of my soul. I am as deeply connected to it as I am to the night and the ocean. Few things on earth please me as much as the rain, the darkness and the cold.
   Call me "weird" or "freak" if you feel you absolutely must, but know that it's nothing I haven't heard countless times before.  ::)

In a few minutes, I must leave for work...and that in itself is a subject that I have found myself pouring over more and more often these days.
   Though transferring to the customer service department of the company would be a good career move from a financial standpoint, I doubt that it will happen. I have mentioned the other candidates who better qualify for the position, plus, I would get very little satisfaction out of it with the one monitary exception.
   While I like my current position and working environment and love the people whom I work with, it doesn't meet my needs. Should my "promotion" fall through, I doubt that I will remain with the company much longer. I'd do much better to find something that works in harmony with the lifestyle I desire...unconventional as that may be.

Anyway, the winds of change are beginning to blow...and change is exactly what I need right now.

Valentine's Day went surprisingly well. My boyfriend got me a card and a black and silver heart-shaped locket.  :D  I have agreed to get pictures taken with him (though I loathe being in front of a camera) for the purpose.
   We went to Souplantation for dinner because we had coupons for it. Ugh! That may have been a mistake. The place was so crowded (which didn't surprise me - it was Valentine's Day & the place is pretty cheap) and my boyfriend mentioned that his dinner wasn't that great. I only had a salad & a piece of buttered bread before I was stuffed.  :-/  We were glad to get out of there.
   After that, we headed to Target to pick up a few things...I was able to score the Herbal Essences Replenishing S&C - yes!! And then we went home.
   Honestly, shopping with him and spending time with him at home were more romantic than going out to dinner with all of the wine, roses & chocolates clichés. My mother always said, "Romance is where you make it."
   All in all, a good night. This morning I have "The Air That I Breathe" by The Hollies stuck in my head.  ;)

Anyway, I must be off now. Until next time.

wrote on Feb 15^th, 2006 at 6:08pm:

Speaking of which, has anyone else ever smelled the inside of a ping-pong ball?  :P

.... and you say I hang out with "interesting" friends?...... those who smell ping-pong innards should not bounce the ping-pong ball at me!

lol @ ping-pong innards

These were co-workers, BB. I didn't choose them.  ;D

wrote on Feb 15^th, 2006 at 6:08pm:

It would be a grave understatement to say that I love the rain, for it is literally a part of my soul.

Ahhhh, I thought that I was the only wierdo that loved cloudy rainy days!  I actually much prefer them over sunny days.  Sunny days make me irratable, especially on my few & far between days off.  I don't care for being in the rain when it's like 35 degrees outside, but I love being inside, warm, just listening to it.  I do love in the summer the lightning storms when we can keep the windows open to listen and smell the rain....ahhhhhh, I can't wait for that!  Although, I do love the snow, too...

I guess i can come out of my closet now ;D

My bedroom (in one of the 7 houses we've lived in) had a balcony, and i would always sneak out when it's raining or snowing out, and everyone is asleep...just sit there and get wet. I always felt like it was my sacred time...

I love rainy days too!!! Last night it rained a ton and i love how it is just nice for thinking and reading with soothing tea.

This will be my last post here for awhile. I will be taking a forced indefinite hiatus from the net, as tomorrow my computer must be dismantled and repaired. Thanx be to the meddling ex-roommate.  >:(

Speak of the devil (literally), my boyfriend and I have finally begun purging our place of his evil presence. I spent the last 3 days thoroughly cleaning and sterilizing our kitchen, while my boyfriend has emptied out his cousin's old room and thrown all of his leftover belongings into a trash bag so he can give them back all at once. And God, the things we found in there...  :o  :-X  :P
   My boyfriend hasn't been very happy with his cousin of late. Given the circumstances about which he left and that he messed up our computer. This morning I asked my beloved if he wanted me to kill his cousin...and he said yes (FINALLY!).  ;D  Not that I would soil my hands with the job.  ;)

Last night I slept alone yet again. *sigh*
   My boyfriend had errands that apparently kept him out until past 11:30 pm. I called him then & he said he was just getting ready to head home. I told him I wouldn't be awake when he returned...and I wasn't.
   At 4:00 am I woke up and he still hadn't come home! Angered, I called his cell number again only to have it ring and ring before going to voicemail. Then it hit me. It was raining hard and he had been driving...he wouldn't have been able to see anything...and now he wasn't answering his phone!
   Consumed by panic, I called again and again, even leaving a voicemail once. No answer. With my heart in my throat, I rushed out onto the balcony and looked out into the rain, hoping to catch some semblance of him - anything! Nothing. Nearing tears, I folded my hands on the balcony's railing, bowed my head and pleaded for God to return my beloved safely to me.
   The biting cold drove me back into my apartment just then, so I sat on the edge of my bed and just...hoped, knowing that there was nothing else that I could do. My body was still thrashed and exhausted from 11 straight hours of cleaning, but I knew that I wasn't likely to be getting anymore sleep. I hadn't worried that much - so fanatically - about anyone since my former husband.
   About half an hour later, my phone rang...and my prayer was answered by his voice on the other end of the line. He explained that he had come home earlier only to find me asleep. He had drank coffee and was wired, so he had gone off to a friend's house to play poker. His phone was on vibrate so he couldn't hear it when I called. This is God's sense of humour. He gave my boyfriend back to me...same as he ever was.  >:(  
   Furious, I hung up on him. I did not answer when he tried calling back, but tried, despite my anger, to go back to sleep. I had just about succeeded when he walked through the door with all the quiet grace of a semi.  :P  
   Taking me by surprise, he actually apologized and admitted that what he did was a bad idea. Apologizing AND admitting he was wrong?! Completely unheard of for a man! I was surprised, but still quite angry, and my response was brief. I finally fell back to sleep in our bed while he cleaned up in the living room before crashing on the couch.  :-/

This morning, I explained to him how worried I had been and the circumstances which caused it. He understood.

So yeah.....hair.

I'm back on Pantene's Daily Moisture Renewal line with a vengeance. I'm washing with the 2 in 1. Yesterday I used the Intensive Moisturizing Mask and today I used the Intensive Restoration Treatment before conditioning again with the DMR conditioner.
   This morning, I realized how many unused Herbal Essences conditioner bottles I still have lying around, so I've decided, rather than letting them go to waste, that I'll use them for 2nd conditionings each day until they're gone.
   I've also been heavy-oiling nightly. In a week, I'll check the progress.

Anyway, this entry is long enough now, so I'm afraid I must bid all of you a fond adieu. I'm not sure when my next entry will be, but I know that getting away from the computer for awhile will be good for me somehow. Until then, hair friends....it's been fun.

Peace!

This is probably pointless since you might not see this until after the computer comes back, but take care, Angel Spun! I hope you won't be gone too long.

We'll be awaiting you return!

Wow, he apologized :o...musta been the poker- just kidding :P :)

Anyway, i guess now it's your turn to leave us for a few days :P, you'll be missed :-*

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack!  ;)

For now, at least. We're not sure how long this particular Windows setup will last without an activation code, but I know that we're OK for at least 30 days.

Today was a shopping day.  :D  I headed out to East County with the intention of getting a decent new pair of sunglasses...and returned bearing bags filled with mostly black & vanilla stuff.  ;)

I got 4 new black "poufs" or "mesh sponges" for the shower, since my silver ones are already falling apart.  :-/ New shades (all black, of course, with semi-reflective lenses), and a bottle of black nail polish, which I actually haven't had for quite awhile.  :o  I know...a goth without black nail polish is almost like a goth without...black eyeliner. No worries there, though....have plenty of that.  :P

I also got three 16 oz. bottles of vanilla sugar bodywash, two 10 oz. bottles of vanilla sugar body spray, a tube of ChapStick Lip Moisturizer in the vanilla mint flavor (I guess my boyfriend will just have to learn to like vanilla!), a bag of glue sticks for my hot glue gun and a bag of Baked Lays. Mmmmm...

I've been Pantening again lately. Yeah I broke down & used Herbal Essences again with disastrous results. I don't think I'll ever use it again, fortunately. No fragrance is worth all of the tangling, static, dryness and damage.  :(  I'd really love to switch to Restoratives entirely...if the conditioner would just stop burning my neck!  >:(  I have issues.

My "surrogate parents" arrived from Kansas on Thursday night. I still haven't seen them.  :(  Maybe tomorrow. We need to catch up on things - it's been about a year since I last saw them.

The boyfriend is helping his friends move up to Ontario today. Ontario, California....not Canada.  :P  He was with them all yesterday getting our blasted computer fixed & it still isn't 100% functional. The suspicious part of me wonders "what else" he was doing with them, though I know I should probably just stop thinking & trust him. Problem is, he's violated that trust too many times for me not to be suspicious...but I guess too much of either trust or suspicion is a bad thing. It's a very delicate balance.

Good news is after these people move away, I won't have to worry about him doing things with them that he shouldn't be doing in the first place. Another one of his friends is moving to Europe...so I won't have to worry about him either.
   Don't get me wrong, they're nice enough people. But their morals leave much to be desired & they are bad influences on my boyfriend. Oy, I feel like his mother.  :P
   When he & I first got together, he told me that if he was going to be successful in his goal to quit smoking, he would have to stop hanging out with his current circle of friends. At the time, I told him that I didn't want him to change all of that for me. *sigh* What a naive little thing I am...

Last night, he drank coffee with his friends & wasn't home until after midnight. Yet again. I'm beyond tired of this, as anyone would be, but I'm not going to be at wit's end over it. Letting it drive me crazy would be pointless because his behaviour isn't going to change. I know that what matters is that I just look after myself, because that's the only person I can change.
   And if I happen to meet someone better along the way... *wicked giggle* I didn't say that.  :-X

Anywho, this entry is long enough. Time to make up some dinner for one. Peace out.

wrote on Feb 26^th, 2006 at 1:58am:

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack!  ;)

Yay. I enjoy reading your updates  ;D


Quote:

Today was a shopping day.

My goodness, I'll say it was. I think women were made to shop. You go girl.

About your boyfriend woes, I wanted to tell you that I have been in your shoes. One of my exes used to stay out w/friends until six o'clock in the morning, doing things that are naughty (illegal substance use). I would lie awake in our bed all night, shaking from anger. It's not a fun place to be, so...I guess I am just writing to say I can feel your pain as I read your words and I want you to know that you're on my mind.  ;)

Yaayyy glad to have you back :D :) :)


mmmm...vanilla ;D who doesn't love the smell of vanilla ???

mmmmm Vanilla :)  I took like the smell of vanilla.  I even put a few drops of vanilla extract on the vacuum cleaner filter before I vacuum - makes the whole house smell yummy!  (this is a good trick when you are selling a house!).

As for your boyfriend.... you are right you can't change anyone but yourself.  However, if he continually puts himself before you, then you have a onesided relationship that will never make you happy.  Relationships typically require give and take on BOTH sides.  I hope he realizes this soon or he will lose his girlfriend.

Thank you kindly for the welcome back's, you guys.  :D

LJ: You are too sweet! And yeah, my guy has had tendencies in the past to use illegal substances too. That's why I can't completely trust him now.
   Let me guess...such experiences are why that particular ex of yours is your ex, right? Nobody deserves to be put through that. I swear, there are so many thoughtless creeps out there!  >:(  ((((hugz, girl))))

Beesan: My boyfriend is weird about vanilla. He likes the fragrance, but wants to eat it. So he doesn't really like it on people. I have a vanilla/honey/shea butter lotion that he says makes my hands smell like vanilla cookies.  ;D  A far cry better than what his hands smell like, though!

BB: What a cool vacuum trick! You must have a bagless vacuum if it has a filter. I wonder how such a trick would apply to a bagged variety.  ???

Quote:

However, if he continually puts himself before you, then you have a onesided relationship that will never make you happy.  Relationships typically require give and take on BOTH sides.  I hope he realizes this soon or he will lose his girlfriend.

Indeed, indeed. 'Tis all quite true. *sigh* He does need to realize this for himself.

Hair hair hair! Mine is frustrated at the moment because I lazily and stupidly waited until 4:00 to take a shower, letting all of that natural oil just gather and gather - bleagh!  :P  This plus the oil left on the ends from yesterday plus washing twice with a 2 in 1 all adds up to some pretty ucky roots.  :P  :P
   Right now I'm waiting to rinse out my Intensive Moisturizing Mask treatment and get on with the evening. I've been invited to join my parents and surrogate parents for dinner at Claim Jumper (where my younger sister works - the same place I went for my birthday  ;D) so I'm pretty stoked.
   My meds are making me kinda nautious right now, so I'm not sure exactly what I'll be able to eat.  :-/  Ah well.

I'm currently awaiting a call back from my mother so we can arrange a time to meet. Speaking of which, I think that's her now, so....off I go!

LOL :) have you tried the vanilla perfume oil at Gap. It's all natural, and best of all it doesn't have alcohol in it- which is basically what i look for in perfume.

I love vanilla, too! :D  I have a bottle of vanilla oil that I bought from bath & body eons ago, still smells great though.  I only need to use a few drops at a time, that's why it's lasting so long...but I don't mind!

wrote on Feb 26^th, 2006 at 11:49pm:

BB: What a cool vacuum trick! You must have a bagless vacuum if it has a filter. I wonder how such a trick would apply to a bagged variety.  ???

YES!  It will also work if you put the vanilla on the bag.  It is the warm air being forced through the bag that will freshen the air with the small of vanilla.

BB: Ooh la la! Thanx for the tip! That sounds awesome!

Magz & Beesan: I do like vanilla, though it's not my favourite fragrance by far. I like ping-ponging around from one super-potent fragrance to another. Keeps things interesting.  ;)
   Those vanilla fragrance oils sound interesting. I wonder if they could be simmered... My skin is extremely allergic to oils.  :-/  A few times I tried coating my hands with petroleum jelly and leaving them in socks overnight (an old hand-softening trick of my mother's) and each time, my freaking hands broke out in small pimples because of the oil. *sigh* I have to be really careful about what goes on my skin. Hair is fine, but skin is one diva organ!  :P

So last night, I met my parents, sister and surrogate parents in the bar at CJ for a drink. I only had time to half finish my Shirley Temple before my sister's shift ended and we all piled into her car to go across the parking lot to another restaurant called Casa De Pico.
   OMG, what a place!! I had seen it many times from the street while driving, but had never been inside. Gorgeous! All of the colours & décor were bright, authentic Mexican. There were Spanish-style wrought iron lights everywhere you looked. Plants, Dia De Los Muertos figurines, fresh tortillas - this place had it all!! There was even a live marriachi band that performed at all of the tables.
   The portions were huge, the drinks were huge, the food was absolutely delicious (and loaded with avocados, mmmmmm)...I am definitely going back!!!  :D
   Cool thing about Casa De Pico is that it is one-of-a-kind. It was one in a collection of restaurants and shops in Old Town, CA called Bazaar Del Mundo, which was owned by one rich elderly lady. Long story short, she lost her lease on Bazaar and all of its shops & restaurants had to be relocated. So Pico was relocated into the same parking lot as my sister's restaurant...and she'd rather work there!  ;)
   
After dinner, we all went back to my parents' house and just hung out. I finally got to do that "catching up" with my surrogate parents. Came to find out that their oldest son (my lifelong friend, surrogate brother and *ahem* major old flame) will be in San Diego for 3 days with his wife!!! I don't remember whether they said it would be in March or April, but still.... I haven't seen them in about 4 years (egad, has it really been that long?!), so it will be AWESOME to see them again!!  :D
   I am really looking forward to it.

My boyfriend spent the entire weekend helping some friends move all of their stuff up to L.A. In return, he got a free weight bench and permission to borrow their HUGE flat screen plasma TV with surround sound for a year. He is wayyy more stoked about all of this than I am. I didn't see him at all.  :-/ Big surprise there.

The story gets much worse yet, but I haven't time to write about it before I retire for the night. It's only just after 11:00....oy.

I'm getting sleeeeeeeepyyyyyyyyyyy......

Hair is good, though I didn't oil today. Drat.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Freakin' freakin' freakin'..... Another freakin' week draws to a close & not a moment too soon.  :P

Work: Same as ever, but at least I have food.  ;D  One very generous co-worker likes to share whatever snacks she has with me...be it popcorn or jalapeño cheese bagels. heh My mother keeps an emergency stash of crackers & microwavable cups of stew or Beefaroni in one of the supply cupboards. There's almost always something in there.
   No more bounced checks either...and I've been racking up serious hours lately  ;D

Just had taxes done 2 days ago. God, I cannot wait for the returns. I got over $500 back last year. But I might actually keep whatever I get back this year...at least for a little while.  ;)

Hair: It's an Herbal Essences day today.  :D  I didn't bother clarifying between shampoo switches, as 1.) I don't have any HE Clarifying shampoo and 2.) my skin has been so dry lately that it hurts to move, so I'll save the clarifying & vinegar rinses for a later date.
   This time, I just did what I used to do when breaking in a new S&C - shampoo twice! Of course, I conditioned twice too. The shampoo I used was Herbal Essences Replenishing (pink). Conditioned first with the Replenishing (pink) conditioner & left it in with a shower cap over while tending to my other shower duties...then rinsed out. Conditioned a second time with my left over Moisturizing (yellow) conditioner. Left that in a minute or 2, then rinsed.
   No irritation or burning this time, I am happy to report.  :D  And my hair looks & feels fine, not dry or tangly or staticky. Plus, that classic fragrance. Ahhhhhhh....  ;)  So far, so good.
   Used the leave-in conditioner before detangling with my RS #45. While my hair was still damp, I spritzed the ends with my new mix of baby oil & water.
   If it turns out that my skin & hair can actually tolerate it this time, I may switch to Fruit Fusions Hydrating formula, which my boyfriend uses every day. Yeah, he loves all of that fruity, "girly" stuff as much as any chick.  ;D  hehehe
   On that subject, last night, I washed & conditioned his hair for him (he loves it when I play "shower assistant"  :P) and he mentioned that the conditioner actually burned the back of his neck too! So it's not just me.

"Relationship:" I hate that word. It's so beige & casual. I hate the platonic, non-committal meaninglessness about it. Blagh.
   Whatever happened to true love? Romance? Passion? Poetry? Is the rest of the world so jaded as to think that these things no longer exist? I beg to differ...

Anyway, as if the whole "relationship" concept weren't enough, the past few days have been wreaking havoc on my romantic little mind in that I still don't know where I stand with my current beau. I guess I never really have.
   His hot & cold behaviour has always been there to confuse the living crap out of me. But this week has been especially rough. One day he's scolding & cursing at me like a sailor & telling me in the rudest way possible to pack up my things & leave. The next day he's making dinner for 2 and fawning over my alleged "beauty." Oy. This dude has problems.  :P

Life, or complete lack thereof: My boyfriend moved the computer into his eeeeeeevil cousin's old room...without cleaning or steaming the carpets or anything first!!  :o  :P  :-/  I refuse to touch anything in here still...especially the floor. And I refuse to let anything of mine come into this room.

For the past few days, my beloved has been trying to fix the place up. Moving furniture, giving things away, throwing things out, etc. The problem is that he lost his job a few days ago...so the place is still in shambles & he's so occupied with side jobs that he's never around to fix anything. The kitchen that I worked so hard to clean & sterilize is an absolute pig sty. *sigh* I really don't know why I bother.  :-/  Responsibility is just not in this guy's vocabulary.
   I mean, yes, I understand that he's out working as much as he can, wherever and whenever he can just so we can have a roof above our heads. I respect that totally. But when it comes to completely neglecting your duties at home? Not cool.  >:(

Anyway, speaking of work, I should be getting to the office myself. 6-7 total hours of sleep in 2 days doesn't exactly help matters...but we need the $$ more than ever right now.

More later.

Tangles - UGH!

Curse you, Herbal Essences!  >:(  Curse you and your hard-to-resist fragrances! Tempt me no more!  >:(

wrote on Mar 3^rd, 2006 at 4:36am:

Tangles - UGH! Curse you, Herbal Essences!  >:(  Curse you and your hard-to-resist fragrances! Tempt me no more!  >:(

LOL!  I use to be a HE fan too, for years!  I remember when it was in a neat bottle with a picture of a long haired lady on it.  When the new stuff came out I had to use half a bottle of condish to get the tangles out myself! ::)

wrote on Mar 3^rd, 2006 at 4:36am:

Curse you, Herbal Essences!  >:(  Curse you and your hard-to-resist fragrances! Tempt me no more!  >:(

LOL!!!!

Did a mayo treatment this morning...left it in for just over an hour, then onto the Pantene blitzkrieg.  ;D

I finally climbed back onto the wagon & clarified. Pantene Purity shampoo for the first wash, then a great big vinegar rinse. No really, it was 1.5 litres of distilled white vinegar & water.
   Second wash was with Pantene DMR shampoo. Not a trace of vinegar left but hair felt oh-so-soft!  :D
   Conditioned with the DMR conditioner & capped while tending to my other "shower duties," then rinsed out with cool water. Ahhhhh luxurious!

Sprayed in the usual Pantene leave-in's: Light Spray Conditioner & Daily Moisture Treatment. Not one bloody tangle - now that's what I like to see!  ;)  Spritzed the ends with my mix of baby oil & water, which actually absorbed completely when my hair dried. Zero tangles...though the leave-in's made my roots a bit starchy. Had to work through my hair root to tip with a BBB while at work, but now it's all silky, perfectly-aligned and tangle-free. Thank goodness!

Tomorrow, I'm not sure what I'll do as far as treatments go, but I know I'm going to do at least one. My beloved will be working all day, so I'll have all the time in the world to devote to multiple treatments if I so choose.  ;D  Buahahahahahaaa!

In other news, work was awful. Had some guy come in today & start giving me crap because he didn't understand how the whole application process worked. I could barely understand his broken English & he did not at all understand how the whole employment application process worked. He ended up becoming quite condescending & confrontational...I wanted to kick him out of the building. heh Lucky for him that I was "on duty."
   I did everything I could for this guy & then he proceeded to tell me that I had an attitude and insinuate that I was racist!! WTF?! Some people, man, I swear!  >:(

Ahem. But I'll not speak about him anymore. I've already given that creep FAR more mention than he'll ever deserve.  :-/

I've decided that I need a new Mustang ASAP.  ;D  My beloved little Mercedes isn't going to last much longer & I'll need a replacement before then. I figure I'll just trade it in  :'(  *sniff* when I buy my new 'Stang.
   I swear I'm gonna miss that car. He is really my partner in crime & we've made so many memories together. Best car I've ever driven, bar none.
   But we've got at least another year together, I suppose. Maybe. heh Unless my Mustang fever worsens & I feel compelled to buy one tomorrow without knowing or caring how I'll afford it.  :P  Oy.

Oh yes, and my boyfriend bought "Corpse Bride" on DVD today.  ;D

Anywho, that's all for now. All that's left to do is SLEEP.  ???  Foreign concept these days...

Peace!

Did you say.......a.....MUSTANG??

::Turning green with serious envy::

Oh my gawd, that is my dream car!!!  My ultimate dream would be to have a shiny black '65, but the new ones are hot, too.  Keep dreamin' maggie...I'm forever doomed to a '94 shadow that now has a bad transmission, and even fancier...now don't get jealous ladies...a '93 Plymouth Voyager Van with some ultra-cool cancer on the sliding door.  Now that's a hot ride!  I just love all the clunking, creaking, squealing, banging, squeaking, hissing and popping sounds it makes when I driving it.  Makes me feel so cool, and makes people very *aware* of me, yup, doesn't get much sweeter than that.  Eat yer hearts out!

So, now Angel, what were you thinking going back to HE?  You knew you'd come running back to the safe haven of Pantene!  Tsk, tsk, tsk. :P  I do it too, we may never learn...

Quote:

So, now Angel, what were you thinking going back to HE?  You knew you'd come running back to the safe haven of Pantene!  Tsk, tsk, tsk.   I do it too, we may never learn...

LOL!!! I know, I know. What was I thinking? Well, to quote an old cliché, I wasn't thinking!  ::)  And you're right, I knew I'd be back. hehehe I guess we always know, don't we?  ;)

And yes, I said a MUSTANG. Brand spanking new, hot off the press & right outta the lot, yup. I'm looking at a new V6 for '06. Hopefully it can work. Somehow.
   They've always been my dream car too. Originally, I wanted a black '66 Fastback (with side gills, not back) with a totally modern interior, but I think an '06 might be even better. Oy...I need to work more hours!!!  :P

...not that your rides don't sound ultra-sexy, Magz.  ;)  ;D

Alright. Today's lunch is a baked potato with sour cream, chicken noodle soup, whipped key lime yogurt & whatever else I can get my hands on that's healthy.
   When my boyfriend helped his friends move a few days ago, they gave him all of their leftover food, so our cupboards are overflowing with boxes and cans of everything. I've spent the past 3 days living off of microwaved popcorn so substance is good.  ;D

This morning, I loaded my hair with mayonnaise & left it in for about 4 hours.  :o  I was surprised how much of it was actually absorbed. Guess my hair is thirsty.  :-/

My boyfriend spent all of this morning & part of the afternoon working with his father in Mexico.  :P  Nasty. But it left me with ample time to "play hair."  ;D  So I rinsed the mayo out, washed once with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo, rinsed, then tucked my hair up under my shower cap to do all of the "other stuff." While this was going on, there was almost no hot water left and the pressure was lower than usual. I ran out of bodywash & hadn't left the bottle upside down so I had to squeeze, spurt and splatter out whatever I could onto the black mesh sponges. I also had to squeeze the bejeezes out of my tube of facewash to get just a small dallop. Clearasil has changed their bottles & it's a bit trickier to get the stuff out now.  :-/
   With all of that out of the way, I then realized that I hadn't gotten my jar of Pantene's Intensive Moisturizing Mask out from under the sink, so I had to step out of the shower into the frigid air to grab it.

Now here I sit with the mask treatment in my hair & all of the little inconveniences behind me...hopefully. My hair did feel a little weird after I rinsed the shampoo out...like maybe I didn't get all of the mayo out or something.  :P  I'll have to wait & see when it dries.

My dear guy came back, but was only in the house for a moment.  ???  I don't know where he went, but I'm not about to go chasing after him in my bathrobe & shower cap. heh My last relationship taught me that no guy is worth chasing around when you're less than fully & decently dressed. Or at all for that matter.

Anyway, it's been awhile since my mention of smelling "ping-pong innards" as bikerbraid so aptly put it, and ever since then, I've felt somewhat compelled to share the story.  ;)

See, a few years back, I used to work late nights in the Production department of Trader Publications (that's right, makers of the Auto Trader & similar mags).
   Well at least one night of the week used to run us especially late, and toward the end, the department was left with a total skeleton crew.
   It was on just such a night that I walked into the breakroom, which was equipped with a foosball table, a pool table and a ping pong table among other things. Ping pong was by far the most popular, and almost every one of the employees from every department played regularly. So it was no surprise for me to see a group of my co-workers playing when I walked in.
   I sat for awhile on one of the breakroom's 2 couches beside the TV and watched them play. One co-worker who was out of the game, sat in one of the chairs in the same area as me, closely examining a broken ping pong ball. They would often crack and develop holes as they were battered around so much.
   Then from out of nowhere, the idle co-worker asked his fellow ping pong players, "Have you guys ever smelled the inside of a ping pong ball?"
   Everyone in the room looked at him like he was nuts. It was a very off-the-wall question.
   One of the players answered, "No. I'm not sure that I'd want to admit that I'd smelled the inside of a ping pong ball."
   The "out" player went back to smelling the broken ball, and soon enough, other co-workers joined in. The broken ball was passed between all of the players as they stopped their game.
   At first I thought the "I'm not sure I'd want to admit..." guy had a point, so I decided not to. But eventually, curiosity got the best of me and I took the holey ball from the ping-pong-ball-smelling initiator, placed the hole right under my nose and smelled.
   As it turns out, the inside of a ping pong ball smells strongly of camphor. Why is anyone's guess. But it reminded me of the Campho-phenique tonic that my mother taught me to use for canker sores & tastebuds that were coming off...even though its intended use is something like an antibiotic ointment.
   So there you have it. Camphor. And as it turns out, I'm ok with being one of very few people on earth who know this.  ;)

Well, my lunch is now gone and still no trace of my wayward beau.  :-/  Perhaps he had some more work to do. Gotta love his communication though.

As for me, I plan to rinse out this treatment in a bit and then get to washing all of my combs & brushes. Maybe my makeup brushes & tools as well.
   But that's all for now. Can't wait to see what adventures the rest of the day may bring.

Still haven't washed my combs & brushes yet.  :-/  I've been busy with dishes, laundry, kitchen cleaning...and, of course, hair treatments.  ;D

Today I washed twice with Pantene DMR shampoo. Oy vey. Now I think I am able to identify the "greasy roots" problem. It's from the DMR shampoo! The 2 in 1 doesn't do that to my hair for whatever reason. That's fine because I like the 2 in 1 better anyway...more conditioning, more moisture.  :D

Anyway, used the Intensive Moisturizing Mask again today. God only knows how long I left it in. A matter of hours, I'm sure.
   Rinsed with cool water, then followed with Pantene DMR conditioner. Decided to shave while I was rinsing out all of that conditioner. Er...my legs, not my head!  :P

Skin is still flaky, itchy & very, very dry. Still uncomfortable to move. The back & sides of my neck are like sandpaper.  :(  I HATE this stupid southern California Santa Ana weather!!!  >:(

Good news is we're supposed to get rain through the majority of this week!  :D  Something to look forward to.

For what remains of tonight, I have put a little bit more of the Intensive Moisturizing Mask in my hair to sleep in. I hope it doesn't leave too much of a mess on my pillowcase.  :-/
   I also have some prescription silver sulfadiazine cream  ???  on my neck. I'm not sure if it will work, but I figured it was worth a shot. My boyfriend had it prescribed to him when he burned his *ahem* private areas, shall we say, in a welding accident...so it can't be too bad.

Speaking of the bum, he spent the entire day playing disc golf with one friend and then video games with another.  >:(  WTF? Don't I deserve at least a little attention? Sorry if that's selfish, but man I am sick of being treated like his slave/concubine.  :P

Anyway, it's after midnight & my back is giving out. Must get to bed, as I have work tomorrow.

Peace!

Well, I still haven't washed those combs & brushes.  :-/  This is just getting ridiculous.

Today I washed once with Pantene DMR 2 in 1, and left the Intensive Restoration Treatment in for over an hour. After rinsing that out, I followed with the DMR conditioner, and then a vinegar rinse to remove any residue from using the DMR shampoo yesterday.
   After this, I conditioned again, using the last of 2 Herbal Essences conditioner bottles. Now said bottles are empty and in the recycle bag! Hahahaha! Be gone!

On an Herbal Essences note, Club Herbal selected me as their daily winner for a free HE t-shirt. It's like they knew I was giving up on their product for good & are trying to lure me back in with their lush fragrances and residue-free shampoos. Bah! I will not be taken so easily!
   Last night, I told my boyfriend that I had won an HE t-shirt, and asked him if he wanted it, since he uses HE every day. He said, "Sure." HA! Take that, Herbal Essences!  ;D

Anyway, the usual leave-in's today: Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment.

Allowed my hair to air-dry as usual, then brushed it out and rolled it into a velour scrunchie bun.

My boyfriend was gone all day. At around 9 pm, he called me from the grocery store, asking what kind of ice cream I liked.  :D  Awwww.
   He arrived home with my favourite kind - mint & chip - AND Hershey's chocolate syrup a few minutes later.  :D  ;D
   I also learned that he loves sour candy just as much as I do. He couldn't keep his hands out of the bag of sour Skittles that I bought after work.  ;D

Experimenting with a new facewash for night. Clean & Clear for sensitive skin. It's very pure & gentle. No medicines, no moisturizers, just clean. I rather like it, but only for a night cleanser.
   Also used Freeman's cucumber, melon & ginseng peel-off masque. Ahhhh it's like clear skin in a tube! Once that was removed, rinsed & followed with rubbing alcohol as a toner. hahaha I can almost hear a lot of people screaming at the idea...but my skin can swing it.

Anyway, I have the morning shift tomorrow & it's already 11 pm. Better get some shut-eye.

Peace out.

LOL @ HE T-shirt ;D do you think they read your journal? ::)

I never new rubbing alcohol as a toner ??? Will probably work up the courage to try it. But rose water works REALLY well :)

Not much to post tonight...and I'm really tired, so I'll make this brief.

Still having the greasy roots problem with Pantene. *sigh*
   Tomorrow I think I might try Restoratives again. I don't know.  ???  :(

It's a lot like life...everything has its own little set of problems & nothing is ever "right" or "perfect." It's bringing me down, mannn!  :P

No split ends or anything, which is good. And the length is getting to a point where I'm actually starting to notice it now. It's starting to brush against my arms when I do certain things. Encouraging.

Tonight I cooked rotini in brine, then topped with garden variety spaghetti sauce & parmesan cheese. Made garlic bread too. My boyfriend was thrilled to come home to a freshly-prepared meal. Filled him up good too.  ;D  We then sat on the couch and watched "The Nightmare Before Christmas," and he fell asleep halfway through it, asusual.  ::)

Now I'm about ready to hit the hay myself. But there is one more thing that's been on my mind...

Yesterday, I talked to my father over the phone for awhile, and he asked if I was interested in moving back to the house when my ex is finally gone.
   My father now hates my ex and hasn't one good thing to say about him...and has vowed to take drastic measures in order to make my old room inhabitable again.
   I told him that I would have to think about it...and I have been.

Obviously there would be advantages...especially on the financial side. Like I would finally be able to buy that new Mustang.  ;)  Plus, I would have an "out," as my mother calls it, just in case it doesn't work out with my boyfriend. I would no longer live in the slums of the inner city, nor would I be surrounded 24/7 by smoke.

The disadvantages... *sigh* are unfortunately probably more numerous. The biggest one being, probably, that it would mean willingly subjecting myself to the stressful and abusive environment that I have already spent far too much of my life in. Living with them was nothing short of a nightmare...and I remember how desperate I was to move out of there. Both times. It was worse than I could possibly describe...and to this day I rarely talk about it. I never discuss details about it. Too painful.
   Another disadvantage, not to mention a major inconsistency on my part, would be abandoning my boyfriend. I really don't think that my father would extend his invitation to both of us, nor do I think that he or my mother would tolerate my boyfriend's vices/behaviour. In fact, I know they wouldn't. And I normally wouldn't...were it not for this messed up situation. In any case, I am, at the very least, financially obligated to him. We signed onto this gig together and are equally committed to seeing it through together.
   Besides, I want to help him help himself. I want to see him succeed - get out of debt, get an education and make something of himself. I gave my word to his older brother that I would see to that. I don't want to let anyone down.
   Another disadvantage is that my old bedroom would feel tainted, thanx to my wicked ex enhabiting and poisoning it for so long. I don't know that it would ever truly feel like "my room" again. I'd be living with his memory in a way. With his leftover vibes, the "influence" that no amount of cleaning or restoration can erase. Needless to say, that wouldn't be healthy. I'm already messed up psychologically enough.

WHOOOOOAAAAAAA I just ate a bunch of sour powder left at the bottom of my (empty) bag of sour Skittles.  :o  ;D

Yeah...um, psychological damage. I was saying?  :P  

So I've given it some thought...but I really don't think that thinking it through is really going to help. I can overanalyze until I'm blue in the face, but what good would that do? What miracle conclusion could I possibly come to that hasn't crossed my mind already?
   No, I think that the proper action is just to wait and see. If a situation arises where I feel the need to drop everything here and go running back to mother & father like a sissy, then I might. But you know what? I'm pushing 30. I can't go running back to them every time life just doesn't turn out the way I'd like. Eventually I'm going to have to just deal with things on my own.
   Independence. Self-sufficiency. That's what being grown up really means.

But anyway...the offer is still there if I want it. Or if I need it. But as I've said...I remember what life was like for me there, and it's quite obvious by now (I should think) that I will do anything NOT to go back.
   Still, there's always that option. And now, the next time my boyfriend says, "pack up your @#$% and get the &%#$ out," maybe I'll finally take him up on it!

Anyway, totally not sure what to do with my hair now. It's like I've tried everything & nothing is 100% perfect. *sigh* So now what?

Hmm, that is a lot for you to chew over, isn't it?  Although the new Mustang would be nice (reeeaaaallllly nice), it might be healthier for you to stick it out at your current station in life.  I share the same view in being an independent, self sufficient person.  I think that rises above everything.  It's good to know that you can have a safe haven should you need one, but maybe that's all it should be...a "just in case place".  Plus, I also understand your commitment to help and better your bf, and I trust that you'll know when it's no longer good for you, should it ever get that far.  You never know, all your patience and caring that you're investing now just may come back to reward you someday.  In fact, I know that it will, in some form or another, whether it's from him or someone else.  You've got to believe in karma!

magz

Karma. Yessss.... it all comes back to you in the end.

I need to tune into my spiritual/philosophical side again. Between work & the drama at home, I feel the life get sucked out of me more and more each day.

heh if I wasn't all-too-aware of the horrific things life can throw at me (or take away), I'd tempt it to do its worst. God knows I've been strong enough to live through everything that's been thrown my way already.

Today, I finally broke down & did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo (twice), a distilled white vinegar rinse and plenty of cool water.

The water did some pretty funky temperature changes while I was in the shower today.  :-/  >:(  Makes things rather difficult.

Anyway, followed with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner.
   When I got out of the shower, I looked at the clock only to realize that I should have been entering the office right at that moment!! It was as if I'd stepped into some sort of timewarp in the bathroom or something!  :o

In a whirl of clothes, shoes, gear and filthy language,  :-[  I hurried myself together & ran out the door to my car. Caught traffic...but still made it in on time. Whew!

Needless to say, no leave-in's today. Which is fine. I might put some olive oil in my hair for overnight, and I'll want it to absorb.

Boyfriend & I are at odds yet again. *sigh!*  :(  Just when things were looking up.
   I just don't know about this whole "relationship" thing. Perhaps it really would be for the best if I lived a solitary life. I would be content that way. No one to interfere, mess me up or try to pull me off of my path. Just myself and my own terms. That's a dream I wish could be attained.

On the phone today, yet again, my father suggested that I move back in. *sigh* After all that's been going on within the past few days, I have at least thought about it. But still in no hurry...

Supposedly, the rain is on its way. It's been very cloudy for the last 2 days or so...with bits of blue here & there, which I wish would go away. I don't want to see blue skies anymore. Or the sun. I want dark clouds to swallow them all up and enshroud the world in one omnipresent cold shadow.

"I want to see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I want to see the sun blotted out from the sky..."

Anyway...I think I'll freshen up a bit and head out east. Far east, where the air is clear. Maybe it could help clear my head. And my lungs. *cough*

Just when things couldn't get any worse...

Yesterday, when I arrived at work, my mother informed me that my grandmother, who is currently undergoing chemotherapy treatments for liver cancer, is dying.  :'(

My grandfather had called from the hospital to say that my grandmother was not doing well. She has undergone 2 chemo treatments, and her liver has shut down.
   My father immediately took the first available plane up to WA state to see her (the grandparents I have mentioned are my father's parents).

So needless to say, I spent the whole workday in misery. I tried praying a few times, but I think that all I was able to get out was, "Oh God." I'm sure He knows the rest.  :-/

To add insult to injury, I have learned that one of my co-workers wishes to date me.  :P He came up to my desk twice and engaged in half-hour-long flirtatious conversation (the flirtation being entirely on his side, of course). heh That poor sucka is in for a rude awakening. *eeevil grin*

After work, I did the only thing that comes naturally to a woman who is upset: shopped 'til I dropped!!  ;D  I bought some new makeup and a cute top from Target that has summer goth written all over it (no, not literally!). Picked up some new Dark Cheer detergent too. hehe I dig that. Dark Cheer. Not only is it formulated for dark clothing (hello), but I just like the way it sounds.  ;D

When I got home, I put away everything that I had bought, did a load of laundry and just sort of crashed. My boyfriend came home & took shower. He got out to find me sprawled upon our bed, crying like a sissy. I couldn't help it. Everything that had gone on in the last week - especially the last day - had caught up with me, and I had to let it out.
   Though we hadn't been on very good terms for the past few days, he seemed to forget about that. He laid beside me, asked me what was wrong, listened and comforted me as I poured it all out - starting with my grandmother. Then we worked out our own problems. And then I told him about the guy at work who wants me. My boyfriend offered to set him straight. *chuckle*

So we're more or less OK again. And today I have resumed my favourite hobby of spending $$ like a drunken sailor. After paying a bill or 2, I ordered some new clothes and an Egyptian cotton blanket. Hope they arrive soon.

The last news I've had on my grandmother's condition is no news at all. No change from what I last heard, and at this point, I guess no news is good news. My mother & I may both fly up to WA state in a few weeks. In the mean time, I'll just keep praying...although I'm not really sure just what to pray for.

So.....hair. I'm on day 2 of the week-long Pantene plan with Daily Moisture Renewal. The past 2 days, I've shampoo-ed once with DMR 2 in 1, left the Intensive Moisturizing Mask in for an hour, then chased it with the DMR conditioner. Today, I chased that with a dose of Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner. I'm trying to empty the bottle so I can recycle it, but don't want to waste the conditioner...even though it burns.  :-/

The usual leave-in's today and yesterday: Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment. Yesterday I oiled the tips. Today I didn't.

I did finally get around to washing all of my combs and brushes a few days ago. Today I threw both combs in the dishwasher yet again.

I have also stopped taking Biotin, because it hasn't done jack for my hair from what I've seen. I've started taking vitamin E again. Anyone else know of any great hair vitamins? Just thought I'd ask.

The rain here has been intermittent. Pouring one minute, sunny the next. Last night, there was thunder & lightning.  :D  That was awesome!! But it only lasted a few minutes.

Such is life for the moment. Of course, I will keep record of any changes.

Hang in there, grandma.

I will keep you and your family in my prayers, especially your Grandmother.

Aw, Angel, I'm so sorry to hear that your grandmother took such a turn for the worse, I really understand how you must be feeling.  You said that you're not exactly sure what to pray for when it comes to her, and I know what you mean by that.  Last year when my Uncle reached the final stages of his cancer, he was just so sick, all the time, he just never had any good days toward the end.  I found myself praying for him, but not for his recovery, I was asking God to do what was best for him that I didn't want him to be alive just to suffer.  Part of me felt guilty for not wanting him to live anymore, not that I didn't want him alive, I just didn't want him being a human cancer guinnea pig for the medical industry anymore.  Sure enough, God was merciful and took him away in his sleep...at home.  It was a beautiful and peaceful passing, I couldn't have imagined it any other way.  And of course, now I find myself saying those same prayers for my dear cousin.  They are just blasting him with more and more chemo, which is not taking his tumors down, just destroying his immune system and making him more sick.  *Big, heavy sigh*  So just keep praying for God to do what is best, I think that's a fair request of him?

On a lighter note, you have influenced me to try Pantene Restoratives, I chose the Breakage Defense.  I've tried it twice now and am liking it very much so far.  And you're right...it is a pretty blue color!  :)

Hang in there and pray for the rain, we're expecting some thunder showers here ourselves.  ;D

Magz

In my opinion there is nothing wrong with praying for the "best outcome" for a person.  I am a strong believer in quality of life, and when that is no longer an option, then there is no longer any point in continuing in this world.  Give the person and their family the opportunity to accept what is happening and say their goodbyes without a lot of suffering is how I always hope things will end.  A peaceful passing with family present is the best.

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother :'( :'( :'( :'(

I agree with maggie and bikerbraid on the prayer. And you don't have to say it out loud God hears what's in your heart.

Thank you so much, BB.  :-*  :'(

The weekend was a dull one, and again, spent alone. My beloved was running up to L.A. and back, again helping some friends move. At least they reimbursed him for gas.  :-/

I used the "alone time," as usual, to give special attention to my hair. For the past 3 days, the routine has been: shampoo once with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal 2 in 1. Leave the Intensive Moisturizing Mask in for an hour (or more). Rinse out & follow with Daily Moisture Renewal Conditioner. Leave-in's are Pantene Light Spray Conditioner (which I'm quickly running out of) and Daily Moisture Treatment, before detangling with my RS #45.

This routine is working well, except for the oily, stuck-together feeling at the crown (and sometimes on the length) that the leave-in's cause. But that's nothing that a brush-through can't fix.

I regret that I have neglected to oil the ends all weekend. Hopefully I can fix that today.  :-/

Most of all, I am going to try and get myself ready (and hair in order) in time to try out some of the suuuuper gawthy makeup that I bought on Friday, before heading off to work.
   I feel much better when I am entirely put together: clothes, makeup, hair, jewelry, the works! Plus, when the co-worker who wants me realizes that I'm a goth (if he hasn't already), his feelings for me may die and die hard.  ;D  Well, I can hope, at least.

No news yet on my grandmother. It's been 2 days since I last heard anything. That may be good (well, as "good" as can be expected right now) or it could be very, very bad. I'll ask my mother about her today when I get to the office. No doubt she will have much to say.

Anyway, aside from my hair, I have also been using the time to clean up my apartment and finish little projects that had been sitting around for quite awhile.
   I finally finished one of the tombstone candleholders that I'd started....oh about last summer.  :-/  With the dæmon moving in and royally trashing the place, I just couldn't get around to finishing it. But now I have clean, clutter-free counter space.  ;D  And consequently, I now have a set of 2 tombstone candleholders.
   They look pretty close to what I had originally envisioned, but I am not thrilled with them. I am planning to make 2 more, using different materials, to see if that improves things.

I was also able to clean the mistmaker that my father gave me for Christmas and get it running. Still works like a dream, but the on/off switch is much harder to move now. At the moment, I have it running with the blue LED lights lit in it. Looks good as ever.

Anyway, I'll be getting ready for work now. Peace!

:'( Angel,
my thoughts and prayers are with you and your grandma.  I have my degree in Reiki (along with a being a Yoga teacher) so I will send healing light your way.  I hope it gives you peace and serenity.
As for the hair thing,try Silica.  You can find it in the GNC or drug sotre or health food store.
Take care of yourself,
Curlgirl64

Im so sorry to hear about your grandmother! I hope things work out for the best.

Curlgirl64: Thank you so much for the prayers & healing light. I feel quite reassured by the idea that you put out the effort for my grandmother and I.  :)
   Silica, eh? I may have to try that...Biotin wasn't doing squat.

Curlygirl22: Thanx - I have been praying that things work out for the best also.

On Friday, I learned that my grandmother has gone home from the hospital, but her condition hasn't much improved. I went to visit my parents on Monday evening after work. My father has returned safely from WA with all kinds of amusing stories about his family. But clearly, he and his father are taking my grandmother's condition the hardest. They are so alike, it's just scary.

This Friday (St. Patrick's Day) is my father's birthday. And the day after that, a family friend is getting married in a pizza parlour. My mother & I have been collaborating with the bride's daughter on decorations & favours, and the day of the wedding, we will have to arrive on the scene about 2 hours early to set up. Such fun!  ;D

My boyfriend has been working nonstop, literally from the crack of dawn until late at night. Last night, he was too exhausted to take a shower or make dinner, so he brought home some Mickey D's...and of course, they screwed up his order.  :-/  Poor guy.
   He's not exactly on my "good list" right now, though. He just isn't as open and honest as I'd like, and his constant absence does't exactly make it easy to communicate.
   Last night, I got no sleep because he decided to thrash around, roll over on me and hit me in the head.  >:(  So I had to relocate to the couch...and by the time I'd just about fallen asleep there, his alarm went off and he was up.  >:(  After taking an hour to get ready, he said goodbye and left for the day...without so much as an apology for making sleep impossible for me.  >:(
   Tonight, he's going to a concert with his best friend...to see bands that he's not even interested in.  :-/  But he has free tickets, so what the hey, right? *sigh*
   I'm being selfish, I know. He's spent the past few weeks working himself to death just to barely make ends meet...he deserves a bit of fun. But when that "fun" includes surrounding himself with less-than-favourable influences and does not include me...not cool.  >:(

Anyway, I've stuck with my Pantene DMR routine for 6 days now...and my roots are really beginning to show it.  :P  I don't know how long I'll be able to hang with this. Perhaps I'll switch to Restoratives after clarifying on Friday. Perhaps I'll just go back to Herbal Essences. Maybe I'll try Biosilk...maybe I'll just agonize over it all in true gawth fashion. Ugh.  :P  ::)

I'm getting to the point where I just kind of don't care about my hair anymore.  :o  Blasphemous words here, I know. But seems like nothing works and it's all a bunch of wasted effort for so little payoff. I'm starting not to treat it all that gently anymore...and then I get mad at myself when I brush or finger comb too fast or too harshly, or hear those little snaps. Help!!

Maybe I'm just stressed. But my hair is really going to suffer for it. I haven't been eating or sleeping or treating myself well at all. I think I need to relax. But with everything that's going on, I have no idea how that's going to happen.  :-/

Oh yes...and the co-worker that likes me asked me if my boyfriend and I would move in with him since his roommate is leaving. Not to mention, he still finds time every day to swing by my desk and talk to me. Dude...GIVE IT UP ALREADY!!!!

I swear I am just going to snap.

Don't snap.girl :(  Everything will be ok.  While your man is out listening to bands,you do what you like to relax and feel better about yourself.  Things have a way of working themselves out in the end,so don't sweat it! :)
As for the Biotin,from what I know it really is used for the skin first and the hair second.  That's why I say try the silica to see what happens.
If you do go the Biosilk way,I think you'll really like it.  Over here my way I think it's $30 for lemme think,the 16oz. bottle.  Not sure,but I remember it being alittle pricey!  What we don't do for our hair ;D
Let me know how things works for ya on both ends.
Peace,
Curlgirl

*hugs*   :(

*group hug Trisha & Curlgirl64* Thanx, you guys.

After work on Wednesday, I was struck yet again with the urge to herbal.  ;D  That and pick up some necessities for the home. So off I went to East County (I refuse to shop in the inner city - it's a ghetto).

While in the parking lot at Target, a big silver pickup honked at me. At first, I almost didn't respond. But I turned to look, and it was my parents.  ::)
   My mother rolled down her window and asked what I was doing "way out there," seeing as it's so far from where I live. Then they both said that they were on their way to dinner, and invited me to join them. So I hopped into the truck, leaving my car in the parking lot.

At dinner, my father told me that his mother's condition is now "hour to hour"  :'(  and as if that weren't enough... my aunt (his sister) has just been diagnosed with a rare, incurable kidney disease.  :(

Needless to say, I am now not only forced to accept my family's mortality...but also my own. My father, sister and I are all quite concerned now for our future health. And now that I think about it, it makes me even angrier at my boyfriend for his smoking habit. I mean, good God, there are enough things in this world that can kill us involuntarily. Why in the world would anyone add to them by their own choosing?!  ???
   I realize, of course, that this is all making me even more cynical than I already am. People are such idiots and while that may not shock me anymore, it disgusts me ever further.  :P  I think Jhonen Vasquez wrote it best: "If they really had a desire to live, they would've been more aware of how easy it is to die, would've chosen their actions more wisely."

*sigh* So...hair.  :-/
   Yesterday, I did a clarifying wash with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, a vinegar rinse, Herbal Essences Light conditioner and plenty of cool water. My hair felt suuuuuper soft, without the greasy roots, thank goodness.  :)  It also smelled amazing.  :D

Today, it will be standard procedure. Herbal Essences Replenishing S & C and the leave-in conditioner. I bought all of these things when my parents dropped me back off in the Target parking lot after dinner.  ;D

The thing I love about Herbal Essences is it gives my hair a completely different texture and feel than Pantene. Perhaps it just returns my hair closest to its natural state...but there is this luxuriously soft but kind of "hard" feeling about it at the same time. I dig it. I like that it doesn't leave a coating or a residue behind. I like the way it leaves my hair feeling light & airy...and that fragrance. God!!  ;D

Speaking of which, I'd better hop in the shower & get ready for work. Hopefully things will work themselves out soon. *sigh* Tragedy, chaos...and Herbal Essences. That's where I'm at right now.  :P

 I can't stand it I know what you're going through,been there in a different way myself... :(  Just hang in,because just when you think things are so bad or too dark to see anything positive,.....it all turns out for the best.  It could be for something you want or it may turn out for the best of another person or people concerned.  Just don't give up,hang in because you will endure and be fine.  Not that I want to sound like a "Polly Anna",but it will be ok and the turmoil will be able to be dealt with,whether you scream,laugh,cry or be inside yourself.  Ok,ok
As for the smoking......... >:( I can't stand it either.  I used to smoke from age 10-22.   :o I'm now 41 and thank goodness I quit when I did,it's so disgusting,really.  We've better thing to buy,like shampoo,oil,conditioner, hairsticks!!!  You stay strong!!

((((((Huggggz Angel))))))

I think I know all too well what you are feeling.  It is sooo hard trying to compute the impending mortality of the ones you love.  It was hard enough on you with trying to accept your grandmother's, but now you've got your aunt thrown in the mix as well.  I am so sorry that you have to be experiencing all of this...compiled with your dear bf's antics.  I wish I was there, I'd hug you so hard I'd smoosh you!  And then we'd paint each other's nails black, and braid each other's hair, and....I don't know, what else is it that girls do?  Oh yeah!  EAT TONS OF CHA-CHA-CHA-CHOCOLATE!  ;D  (I'm sorry- I never did much of the girlie stuff  :-[)

Okay, on to your greasy-root problem....what method do you use when you are washing and conditioning your hair?  Do you condition from your roots down, or your ears down?  I do from my ears down just for that reason, putting any kind of a conditioner on my roots makes for greasy, flat looking hair.  :-/  I know that you use a lot of leave in treatments and hair masks, do you think that they have anything to do with it?  Do you apply any of those to your roots?  The only thing that touches my roots is either shampoo, vinegar rinse, or aloe gel, never any conditioner or oils...I get greasy enough on my own!  :P  Just thinking here....

Anywayz, try to hang in there girl  :-*, we all love you and are here for you...we'll pick up where bf leaves off!  ::)

Love ya, magz

We're here for ya!!!  Stay strong

(((((((((((group hug Magz & Curlgirl64))))))))))))

Curlgirl64: You are such an inspiration! My boyfriend has been smoking only a little longer than you did, so if you can do it, I know he can.
   I know he could quit if he was really willing to put out the effort. That may be where the two of you differ. YOU were willing & you worked for it. Him...not so much.  :-/

Maggie: The only things that ever touch the roots of my hair are shampoo and the leave-in's, and I suspect both. Especially the former.
   When I condition or treat, I do only the length and never the crown. And the only oil that ever touches my hair is a spray mixture of mostly water and it goes on the very tips only.
   I think that Pantene's Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo and 2 in 1 are just heavy on the conditioners & cones. The Daily Moisture Treatment (leave-in) also contributes to the greasy roots factor, so the answer might be as simple as just switching to a lighter line...like Classic Care or Smooth & Sleek. *shrug*


Quote:

I wish I was there, I'd hug you so hard I'd smoosh you!  And then we'd paint each other's nails black, and braid each other's hair, and....I don't know, what else is it that girls do?  Oh yeah!  EAT TONS OF CHA-CHA-CHA-CHOCOLATE!

lmao Come over anytime! You'd be the ultimate girlfriend in my book!  ;D  We could totally hit up the Godiva chocolatiers in the malls. Plenty to do here in the big city.

Haven't heard anything about my grandmother for a few days. I guess/hope no news is good news.
   My parents considered flying up to WA this weekend to see her, but my grandfather called and said there was no need. Good sign? Bad sign? Neither?  ???
   In the mean time, I've been praying for her every day. Mostly for a miracle.

Quite a turnaround in my boyfriend lately. In a wave of drama on Saturday night, he explained that he was sick of spending so much time apart and leading separate lives. Sunday, he promised, was for US. We went to Disneyland late in the afternoon. It should've been awesome...but it was insanely crowded and, as I discovered too late, he had been chewing gum with phenylalanine in it the whole day!!  >:(  He is phenylketanuric, of course, so by dinner time, he was quite ill. I had to take him home immediately after dinner. We only got to go on 2 rides in Disney's California Adventure (I hate that park).  >:(
   For the past few nights, he's made dinner for both of us and seems to be making an effort to spend more time together. He even took me aback yesterday by announcing his decision to stay with me forever and bringing up a unique idea for our wedding.  :o hehehe I don't know whether to be stoked or run for my life.  ;D

The wedding that I did have some small part in on Saturday went quite well. My sister, her boyfriend and I helped decorate the pizza parlour with balloons and candle centerpieces. The colours were black, silver and red...and the place looked awesome when everyone was done. There were candles, streamers, coloured tablecloths, favours, you name it.
   The bride and groom wore matching black & silver bowling shirts with their names & wedding date embroidered on. My father was the best man and my mother, the "best woman"....the bride thought that the whole "matron of honour" thing was passé.  ;)
   During the reception, we had bread, antipasta and, of course, pizza.  ;D  Then my father pulled out one of his guitars and sang songs with the groom. It was great.

As for my hair, well....ugh.  :-/  I'm ping-ponging again. Pantene DMR = greasy roots, Herbal Essences = tangles. I just don't know. I need to clarify yet again tomorrow.
   If I stick with Pantene, I will most likely end up switching to a lighter line. Or maybe to Restoratives.
   Maybe I'll just try to make it work with Herbal Essences somehow. I don't know.  ???  I'm getting really burned out on the hair thing. I've mentioned that before. Oy.

*shrug* Something has to work. Until I discover just what that is (at least for now), I think I'll just focus on the more mechanical things...like combing and scalp massages. And I must remember to oil the ends every single day. I'm just terrible with that lately!
   I'd really love to actually reach my short-term goal (listed below) this year, but that won't happen if I keep abusing my hair & depriving it of what it needs.

Anyway, the morning schedule left my biological clock a mess & I've been tired all day today. Time for some much-needed and well-deserved shut-eye. Peace out!

:-[thanks,but it's what you want to do that you do.  If he really really wants to;he will.  I'm beat myself,so I'll see ya later! :)

Today I did a clarifying wash with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, Clean-Rinsing conditioner, a vinegar rinse in a pretty Fiji water bottle and plenty of cold water.
   No more greasies, I am happy to report, and my hair smells great!  :)

I've been thinking that I'll just use what I have for now, as far as products go. There's almost no point in going to the store & buying more of anything, because I pretty much already have everything I could ever want. All I have to do is open up the bathroom drawers. Much more cost-effective that way, too.

So yeah, new strategy: use what I already have until it's gone, starting with Herbal Essences.

Alright...other news. *deep breath*

I will be taking yet another forced hiatus away from the net, as my copy of Windows expires in 5 days. So if I'm absent for a time in the near future, you'll know why.

My father took a plane to WA this evening. My grandmother is not expected to make it through the weekend.  :'(  I'll still continue to pray for a miracle until I can't anymore.

This afternoon, I also learned that the family dog...a 10-year-old yellow lab named Bodie...has cancer. Bone cancer, which has already spread to his lungs. He has been aging pretty fast lately, and can no longer do the active things he loves most.  :'(

What else? Hmm....my boyfriend is sick, my car insurance was cancelled today, my registration papers are ruined, one of my rear taillights is burned out, 2 of our 3 horses are dying....it's like someone or something is trying to play a terrible joke on me or something. I'm not going to tempt fate by asking what else it can throw at me...but I can hear it laughing. Laughing as I cry.

Anyway, yeah....tragedy, chaos, Herbal Essences.  :-/  :P

Big big hug to you!!!  I feel so bad that these things are happening to you and your family.....I hope and pray that peace,serenity,balance and calmness are very near for you.  I'll be thinking of you.........

So much for miracles.

My grandmother passed away today around noon.  :'(  :'(  :'( Apparently she was only waiting for my father to arrive before she felt that she could. She was surrounded by her husband and 3 children.

I got the news at the end of my shift at work today. My mother's cell phone wasn't working, so my father had to reach her at work. I answered, but he didn't want to talk to me, he wanted my mother.

Very rarely have I ever known my father to cry. I have seen it happen only a few times...one of them was when our first dog died from cancer.  :'(
   In any case, he was crying when I answered the phone, and I knew what had happened.  :'(

Strangely enough, I believe that I had known even before that...at least on some wavelength. Perhaps more subconsciously than anything.
   One thing my grandmother gave me through the miracle of genetics is a legitimate 6th sense. She was psychic, and so is my father, and so am I, at least a little. Part of that gypsy heritage, I guess. We have always been able to sense things on very delicate wavelengths. I probably sound like a kook...but it's the truth. I believe that I may have actually been aware of her passing the very moment that it happened.

Anyway, I remained strong and professional after my mother started crying...only because she needed me to be. I have been crushed on the inside all day, and for whatever reason, just haven't really managed to let it out yet.

In any case...that's pretty much been my day, or at least the weight of it.

It's a partial and definite relief to know that she is no longer suffering and is free and happy. And that she has been reunited with her parents, who were also taken too soon.
   But there is also the matter of what is left behind. Her husband will be a wreck, if he isn't already, and my father won't be much better. I suppose that all of us will be for awhile...in our own ways.

So...yeah...in other news, as if it matters...

Washed twice with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo and conditioned once with the matching conditioner. Used the Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner, but forgot to oil the ends & they're drying out! That was kinda not my fault, though, because my boyfriend decided to hog the bathroom right as I needed to do this, and before he was out, I had to leave for work.  >:(  :-/
   For the past 2 days, I have been using only my RS #45 comb on my hair - no brushes. I'd like to see what the "no brush" technique does for my hair, if anything.

My Newport News order finally came today. I had ordered a pair of jeans and a vintage-ish blouse, but neither one of them fit.  :-/  That's 3 things that I've ordered recently that haven't worked out, counting a shirt that I got from JCPenney. Grrrr...  >:(  Clothes shopping sux.

Anyway, nothing new to report besides what I've already mentioned, so I guess all that's left to do is sleep. Catch y'all on the flip side.

Curlgirl64: Thank you for thinking of me. I truly appreciate it. Surprisingly, peace and serenity are not far off.

God bless you, grandma. You were the first person ever to call me your angel...now I get to call you mine. Until we meet again...

Angel Spun,
  I'm SO sorry for your loss!

:'(  Angel,I am so sorry.......my heart is with you and your family.......when you do "let it out" it will be such a relief of emotion,pressure and then the calm comes......I'll be thinking of you

I am so sorry for your loss.  I will keep you and your family in my prayers.  You have many happy memories that you will have forever, I hope they will help you through this difficult time.

I just noticed I've been sitting here staring at the cursor for minutes now, thinking of what to say.  I realize now that words aren't always the man for  the job, so here's just a huge ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Know that lots of love & prayers are coming my way for you.

All love, magz

I'm so sorry for your loss. *hugs*

(((((((((((group hug, everybody)))))))))))))))  Thank you so much. *weak smile*

The last few days have been confusing in the way I seem to be handling my dear grandmother's death. I'm either so well-adjusted or so overexposed to pain, loss and unfairness that I haven't reacted the way I always thought I would. It's all very strange, this near absence of passion. I have cried very little yet.
   Perhaps the weight and collective grievance of her funeral will pull me out of my funk. For now, I seem to be just walking around in a haze, with a deep and silent sorrow underneath it all. I can say that since I got the news, it is all I have been able to think about. This might just be one of those cases where random memories throughout time will bring a sudden, uncontrollable rush of tears. I don't know. Like I said, very strange.  :-/

Today I have been neglecting my hair. It's past 2:00 and I haven't even washed it yet.  :P  Kinda gross, but I'm kind of in this "what's the rush?" type of mood. It's Saturday, for crying out loud. I've worked my keister off all week - it's time to relax!
   Perhaps I'm just waiting for the hours of heat and light to pass by so I can start my day...at night.
   When I finally get around to that, I'm going to do a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo, a white vinegar rinse, Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner and plenty of cool - cold water.

Trouble is...my boyfriend's father (who lives next door and manages the apartments) is home, and I hate taking showers while he's home. He likes to scream at us for how much water we use.  ::)  But he can kiss my pallid posterior because I'm sure that the insane cost of rent more than covers it. Oy.

So...what do you do when some loathsome slimeball has your phone number?  ???
   Yesterday, between jobs, I (quite unexpectedly) ran into an old acquaintance from high school. *ahem* A most unfavourable acquaintance. It all happened so fast, that it's like a blur of shock and horror to me now. We recognized each other, exchanged a hug, each asked how the other was doing, exchanged updates...all of the typical social procedures for a case such as this. And then he slipped me a piece of paper and a pen so I could write down my phone number...just to catch up, mind you.
   My first instinct was to refuse, but it all happened so fast, that it seemed surreal in a way. I wanted to give him a fake number of some sort, but found myself writing the real one down! Oops!!  :P
   As I bid him farewell and turned away, I immediately scolded myself for not writing down a fake number of some sort. Anything would have been better than giving that weasel my real phone number - what a thoughtless, idiotic thing to do! *smacks forehead* D'oh!  :-[

Well, nothing I can do about that now...which brings me back to the question....what do you do when an unholy character has your phone number?
   I've been thinking about rambling in French if he actually does call, but 1.) he would recognize my voice, 2.) my voicemail message is self-identifying. *sigh* Egad.
   For now I'm just really hoping that he doesn't call. Ever.

Anyway, I'll try not to think about that too much, as I have enough distress already. For the moment, I think I'll just do a scalp massage to some nice, relaxing music...like Metallica.  ;) Just kidding.  ;D

Hugs for you Angel Spun.  Grieving is done in stages.  When you understand that, you can better deal with the process.  You seem to still be in the "unbelief" stage - still not sure it has actually happened - you are in shock.  Your time to cry will probably still come.  The funeral is when the reality may finally hit you and the tears will flow.  Crying is a necessary stage.

I hope for you, that you will be able to get thru each of the stages and will be able to hold the happy memories in you heart.

As for the person with your phone number - nothing you can do about it now, but wait to see if they call you.  If/when they do, you can be "distant" in hopes they won't continue to contact you.

I'm so sorry about your loss  AngelSpun. Big hugs for you.I wish things get easier for you and your family.

Oh, Angel Spun, I'm so very sorry about your grandmother.

I can relate to your reactions towards it. When my dad passed away, I had all sorts of reactions ranging from shock, anger that he had died, and a kind of numbness because of all the other stressors going on at the same time. I think BB's right when she said that it might not hit you until the funeral. The morning after I got the news about my dad, I felt fine and thought I was okay about it. However, later in the day when I saw his body at the funeral home, I totally lost it because I finally realized that he was gone.

Anyway, I don't mean to draw attention to myself, but I wanted you to know that what you're feeling is natural and others here have gone through something similar. If you want to talk about this some more, please feel free to PM me.

(((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))

I am sorry for your loss (((hugs)))

deepest sympathies, my dear  *hugs*

Thank you, everyone.

Still the drama continues.......

My boyfriend suggested that we go up to Disneyland on Sunday. Though I couldn't afford it, I agreed anyway, and the driving commenced. We were not yet halfway there when an argument (of sorts) ensued...about auto glass of all things...and we turned around and came home. Not one word was exchanged between us the whole way back...an hour of miserable silence - ugh!  :(

When we arrived home, he parked, handed me my keys, tossed me some money for the wasted gas, and we parted ways. He went to waste time with his friends....I went out east to shop and visit my parents. Nothing mends a woman's ailing heart like shopping, you know.  ;)

Anyway, my parents dragged me around with them all day, as they had some shopping of their own to do. We also made plans for our trip to WA this weekend (finally, we all get to go!). Unfortunately, said plans force me to wake up at 2 am on Friday morning - ugh, ugh ugh - but my grandmother is worth it.
   One thing that really bothers me is...we're flying. I hate flying. I hate the idea of flying. I keep having these horrible visions of crashing...and burning...and dying. Dying without working things out with my boyfriend first. Dying on the way to a funeral...I know there's some irony there. And as if losing his wife wasn't enough, what on earth would my grandfather do if he lost ALL 4 of us AT ONCE?!
   Man. Deeeep breath, Angel. Everything will be alright. Odds are in your favour. Just calm down.  :-/
   Anyway, so, yeah....did I mention I don't like flying?

In hair news, I ended up not washing it at all on Saturday. Bleagh.  :P  Well, ok, it wasn't that bad...but not something I care to repeat.
   Sunday, I did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse, and Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Followed with the usual leave-in's: Pantene Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Moisture Treatment. My hair felt more like its usual old self again. Ahhhhhh...
   Today, it was DMR all the way. Washed once with the 2 in 1, follwed with the Intensive Restoration Treatment for 1 hour. Rinsed that out, and chased with DMR conditioner, then just for kicks, followed that with Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner. I'm just trying to get rid of the bottle.
   The usual leave-in's followed, though I haven't oiled in the last 2 days & it shows.

I wonder what grandma would think of all of this hair business. She once privately expressed concern to me that I had some sort of obsessive-compulsive disorder.  ::)  She's probably looking down on me right now going, "Tsk tsk...it's even worse than I thought." Ah well.  ;D

One more thing...I'm typing this at work because as predicted, our "copy" of Windows expired. By the time my boss gets the phone/internet bill, I'll be long gone. Bwahahahahahaaaaa!!  ;D

At work again.

I was delayed so badly this morning, that I didn't have time for a treatment, and that sux because I won't be able to do another one until at least next Wednesday.  >:(  D'oh!

For whatever reason, I decided to test myself and see just how fast I could take a shower. Need to practice before the weekend while I'm in WA. Unfortunately, that involved (and will involve) taking some hair damage.  :(  And I was only able to get it down to 29 minutes. *sigh*
   I will try to treat my hair like gold for the next 2 washes. This weekend will not be kind to it.  :(  But after that, I'll do some serious repair. I'll have to.

Anyway, I have a 6:30 flight to WA on Friday morning. The plane should touch down at 9:30. I am hoping & praying for a safe, successful flight...both ways! It may be silly, but flying scares me to death. I haven't been on a plane in 21 years, and I didn't have such trepidations when I was younger. I wish I didn't now! God help me.  :o  :'(  :(

Anyway, if everything goes well, I will return late Sunday night or early Monday morning.

I am looking forward to seeing all of my (remaining) family in WA. I haven't been there or seen some of them since I was about 13. It will be an experience to remember.

Right now, I can't even manage to write all of the horrors running through my mind. Superstitious, or something...like if I write it, it will come true somehow. Hogwash...isn't it?  ??? Ugh. Please wish me well!!

Take a DEEEEEEP breath.  Think happy thoughts. I know a number of people who have a fear of flying.  I fly alot and fortunately it does not bother me.  Statistically, I am less likely to have an accident on a plane than I am driving to work.  I may not totally understand the physics of getting that huge metal tube up into the air and down again safely, but I trust the people who do understand the principles and have faith everything will go well.  Try to think of a graceful eagle flying along side of you, guiding you and your plane to your destination.

Everything will be fine.  :)

Bring something to do on the plane, like a book or watch the in flight movie.  I use to fly back and forth from New York to Toronto when I was dating hubby.  I found night flights less nerve wracking.  Don't worry you'll be fine!  :)

Here's to  wishing you well, Angel ;D  Don't worry everything will be ok.  You'll look back at this in a few days and you'll feel relief.

Angel, I feel exactly the same way before I fly!  Scared to death!  But once the plane takes off and gains altitude,  I look out the window and feel so lucky that we live in a time when we can see such sights!!  I hope the same thing happens to you, but if not, I hope the rest of your trip goes well, and that you enjoy seeing your family.  

Back in black.  ;)

Both flights were successful, obviously. Thank you all sooo much for your encouragement!

The morning flight to WA was easy enough...rough through SoCal, but pretty smooth from central CA to Seattle. The winds were blowing with us, and we actually ended up reaching Seattle earlier than expected.  :)
   The return flight was another story, however. Not only were we delayed for an hour while they fixed the wings (with everyone sitting on the plane), but the brakes burned up just before take-off - egad! You could literally smell them burning from inside the cabin.  :o  The winds were rough and the flight was shaky...and I never realized that planes were so loud! Anyway, I'm never flying again...if I can help it.  :P

It was kinda cool looking out the window and seeing towns, fields, snow, trees, mountains, bridges, lakes and everything else in such a small scale. Almost like looking at a very miniature model.

Washington was not the way I remembered it...it was actually sunny a lot of the time, and I didn't get to eat a single blackberry.  :(  But it was good to be back just the same. To see the trees...and my mountain...and my family.

On Friday afternoon, my grandfather took my immediate family to the funeral home for a viewing. Oh man, did that mess me up.  :'(  My sister too. We both broke down in tears at the sight of it...I can barely bring myself to write about it. I'm not sure that words could ever do justice to the experience.
   I will say that what we saw in that coffin was not our beloved grandmother. Just her shell. Just what that God-foresaken disease had left behind for the earth to reclaim.
   Her trademark smile and spark of life were gone, and I realized that day just how much a person's soul accounts for what they are as a person. And I thank God that her soul is forever free from pain and suffering.

The service on Saturday was lovely. Flowers of all different types and colours were everywhere.
   My family rode in stretch limo's to and from the services...I had never been in a limo before.
   My father and his band had recorded a few songs to be played while people were taking their seats inside the chapel. A video of pictures from throughout my grandmother's life was set to Bette Middler's version of "Wind Beneath My Wings" and played during the chapel service. I think that's when the tears started for me. They didn't stop until the day was half over...and I still have much grieving to do.  :(
   At the end of the service, they opened the casket for the family to pass by and say their final goodbyes. But I stayed in the private family section of the chapel, part of a floral arrangement blocking my view of what lay inside the casket. I didn't need to see that again. The first time messed me up more than enough. That's not how I want to remember her.  :'(
   After my grandfather put a necklace that she had often worn on her, they closed the casket, and that was when I stood up to leave with everyone else. I ran my hand along the top of her coffin as I left the chapel. In our limo, we followed her white hearse to the gravesite, where I kissed a red rose and laid it on top of her coffin. Beautiful ceremony...but nothing could ever be good enough for her.

After that, the limo's took us to my aunt's house for a reception. This was not the typical sombre post-funeral reception, either...it was more like an Irish wake. Food and family everywhere. It was great...just amazing to see everyone in the same place. Even my surrogate parents from KS were there. All of my younger cousins are bigger than me now...most of them are taller than my father!  :o  What a beautiful reunion.

Sunday, we had planned to get out and do something with my grandfather...but people just kept coming over and we ended up doing exactly what we'd done for the past 2 days - just sitting and talking! I don't think that was what my grandfather wanted.  :-/  Ah well. There's always next time.

Speaking of him, he's taking everything extremely well. At least on the outside. My family is quite worried about him. They think it's a front. But I wonder if in fact he's just very strong, well-adjusted and relieved. A co-worker of mine said that he was probably prepared for my grandmother's death...and she's probably right. In any case, I usually handle things in a similar fashion...and I wonder if he is where that ability comes from.

So what happened to my hair all of this time? That is for the next entry to explain...

Hair. Yeah. Not such a success story.  :P

I washed it on Friday and Saturday mornings, using the same DMR products...with dreadful results!! When I tried pinning my hair up for my grandmother's funeral on Saturday, my roots were so greasy, it looked like I hadn't washed my hair in a week!  >:(

So Sunday, I didn't even bother washing or conditioning or anything. Just let cool water run over it and called it good. The showerhead that I used on Sunday resembled the kind found at the beach...good for rinsing off boogie boards, but not so good for one's hair.  :-/  The spray was harsh and the water flow was just awful.  :P  I let my hair air dry and just put it up in a bun for the day. Surprisingly, there was less grease when I didn't wash it than when I did! Needless to say, I haven't touched anything in the Daily Moisture Renewal line since.

I was grateful for my own showerhead on Monday morning. I did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo, a 1.5 L vinegar rinse, a second Purity wash, and then followed with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner. The greasies were gone!  ;D

Today is my second day using Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense S & C, and I am really liking it so far!  :D  The conditioner hasn't burned my neck, my roots are perfectly clean - not a trace of oil anywhere. The shampoo seems to be concentrated and makes a wonderful, big, soft lather. The conditioner, when left in for awhile, acts as a treatment in itself, which works excellently with my capping routine. The combination of both products leaves my hair softer than it's ever been in it's life and clean! Really the best of both worlds. Plus, it has a loooovely fragrance...kind of like green tea. I'm thinking of buying a bunch of green tea-scented products to compliment it.  ;)

Speaking of green tea, OMG...I had a wonderful blackberry green tea blended crème frappuccino from Starbucks today. It was awesome!!  :D  Blackberries are my favourite fruit (thank you, WA), so anything with blackberry in it...you best believe I'm all over it.

Anyway, so I guess this is the next phase of life. The next chapter in this ongoing drama seems to involve green tea, blackberries, Pantene Restoratives, relief and acceptance.

Until next time.

Yay, you survived the flight(s)!!   ;D
From reading about your grandmother's viewing and funeral, I am now more convinced than ever that (when I die) I do NOT want anything to do with an open casket, viewing, sad funeral service, etc.  I like the idea of a party of sorts, to celebrate the person's life (not mourning their death).  
*hugs*

I am not an advocate of open caskets.  The one exception was when my grandmother who had Parkinson's died.  It was soothing to see her relaxed and no longer shaking.

I realize some people need to see the body for their closure - to realize the person is really gone.  That is fine for them, but I would rather remember them as lively, fun loving, alive people.  I've made it quite clear to my family that there will be NO casket for me.  I want every part of my body that anyone wants or needs to be used and the rest can be cremated.

I'm glad you survived your flights and there are good memories of being with family for the funeral.  Your grandfather has probably not yet had the death hit him full force yet.  Spouses can take longer - after the funeral is not uncommon.  After all the fuss and vistors are done, then they realize how alone they are.  Be sure to send a card or give a call in a week or two to let him know you are still thinking of him.  

*A hug for you and a prayer for your grandmother*

If you ever come to WA, you're welcome to come pick blackberries on the highway with me. :P

I'm glad you're back and I've been thinking about you and hope you're managing.  I truly appreciate you sharing your thoughts and feelings with us all.  It made me realize even more that people who are sick,elderly or nor are very precious to us and we need to reach out more......I even told my grandmother yesterday that when it warms up somemore I'm coming over with my scooter and she in her wheelchair and me in my scooter are going for a ride!!!  She agreed ,which socked my mother.  Even though she may not remember(dementia) I'll remind her we have places to go and people to see!
Always remember your grandmother is looking down at you and smiling...............

Wow...nearly a fortnight has passed since my last entry. Between losing Windows and my dear grandmother's passing, I'm afraid that I've missed much here.  :-/  So I'd just like to say:

Curlgirl64: Right indeed. I think that taking your grandmother out is a great idea. I sure wish I could have just hugged mine one last time.  :'(

Anais: Blackberries are the fruit of the gods...although the deep forest ones are better. The soil by most any roadway is known to contain lead and probably many other things that could affect the fruit.  :P
   (((((((hugzzz)))))))) and thank you for the prayer - I'm sure she appreciates it.  :)

BB: I favour a cremation service over open caskets any day. Fortunately, that's something I only had to deal with once (and believe me, that was more than enough!). As aforementioned, I purposefully did not look when the casket was opened during the service.
   As for yourself, I do hope that you get to walking and biking again soon. Here's wishing you a fast & complete recovery.  :)

Trisha: I agree...although when someone passes away, mourning is inevitable. At best, we can but mourn and celebrate simultaneously.


Quote:

Always remember your grandmother is looking down at you and smiling...............

Either that or shaking her head and muttering, "God, she's even crazier than I thought!" Er...I would prefer the former, of course.  :-/

As I told my boyfriend the other day, the idea of my grandmother visiting me once in awhile used to terrify me...but now I'm more or less OK with it. I just need to remember that it's her beautiful spirit that will be visiting...not the body. *shudder*

The night before last, I pictured her as she was...alive with her signature smile and sparkle, radiant light glowing all around her. With this image in my mind, I fell asleep smiling.
   Granted, I woke up several hours later and vomited...twice...but that was because of the bad soup I'd had for dinner before that. Oy.  :-/

In other health news, I've been more careful about what I've been eating lately. Today I allowed myself some coffee and chocolate, and am not proud of it. Man, I sound like a ninny.  ::)

I have also begun a new strength-training routine of sorts. Just to reclaim the muscle mass that atrophied under the influence of a past prescription.  :P
   This month I have devoted to my arms. I have to break it down into different zones because if I tried to do everything at once, I'd lose focus and interest, like countless times before.
   But right now is a good time to do this because it has actually taken this long for my body to respond to the new medication, which doesn't affect it so adversely.

As to my hair, I am still on Pantene Restoratives: Breakage Defense for S & C. Still liking it, although I'll admit that the fragrances of Herbal Essences still tempt me. Oy. Thank goodness that shampoo doesn't get jealous!  ::)
   Only one leave-in: Pantene Light Spray Conditioner. It works OK by itself, although it does contain oil, which I'm not particularly fond of. I prefer to keep oiling to an absolute minimum: on the very ends of my hair only, as my skin reacts furiously to oil.

Speaking of which, I have been trying to use up my extra virgin olive oil, but it is so heavy, even when mixed with water, that I think I shall retire the rest of the bottle to the kitchen.
   I don't have all kinds of extra cash to spend on jojoba or anything like that, so baby oil will just have to do for now. It's been working well so far anyway.

Hoping to get a new copy of Windows soon so I can drop by here more often and actually reply to some of these posts. No idea how long it's been since I even checked my e-mail. Egad.
   
Well, that's all for now. Or at least all I can squeeze into one post for the moment. Peace.

Good luck for your journey towards better health! Just don't be too hard on yourself- little steps will take you far.  :)

Quote:

I don't have all kinds of extra cash to spend on jojoba or anything like that, so baby oil will just have to do for now. It's been working well so far anyway.

OOO!  OOO OOO! *waving hand in the air*
I have the better part of a bottle left (what size is that--4 oz?  6?  I don't know) that I would LOVE to send you.  I quit using jojoba a few months ago because my hair didn't like it.  But, frugal person that I am (you're not the only one, BB!), I can't bring myself to throw it away.  Would you take it off my hands, pretty please?  If you PM your name/address I'd be deliriously happy to mail it to you!!   :)

Galadriel: Thanx so much.  :)  I wish you the very same.

Trisha: How very kind of you to offer. But right now, I think I should really focus on using what products I already have. There are soooo many bottles of this, that and the other under my bathroom sink and I'd prefer to get rid of some before adding any more!  ;D  Thanx again anyway.

Today I washed with Pantene Restoratives shampoo and then left the Intensive Restoration Treatment in for over an hour. After rinsing that out, I followed with the Pantene Restoratives conditioner.
   Pantene Light Spray Conditioner was the only leave-in. No oil today. Oops.  :-[

I am still being wishy-washy about products. I used Pantene's Daily Moisture Renewal line for years without a problem, and yet recently it has left a terrible greasy residue at the roots.
   The fragrances of Herbal Essences intoxicate me - I love them! I used Herbal Essences for several years before switching to Pantene, but things have changed since then. The products changed, my hair changed (I guess) etc. etc. Now they don't seem to do as much for my hair. But...those scents...!
   I had figured that Pantene Restoratives would be the best of both worlds. A combination of all of the things I love from both DMR and HE...and I was pretty much right. It makes my hair suuuper soft & resistant to tangles like DMR but doesn't leave my roots greasy & has a lovely scent like HE. It's like if Pantene and Herbal Essences had a baby, it would be Pantene Restoratives.  ::)
   So why am I not completely satisfied? Shouldn't I be? Is that even possible for me anymore? Do hair care products cover the full extent of my disappointment or is it something deeper? I've been more unsatisfied and critical with everything lately. Or at least it seems that way. Is that someone else's fault or is it mine? Maybe that's just me being unsatisfied and critical of myself.  ???  
   *sigh* I don't know anymore.

Ahem. So...yeah...in other news, my boyfriend called today while I was at my first job to tell me that he'd finally bought a copy of Windows!  :D  Hopefully he's been able to get everything working by now. After I finish up here (my 2nd job), I'll go check it out.

Speaking of my beloved, he called yesterday while I was at my 2nd job and asked if I wanted to go to Disneyland. Needless to say, I shut down the computers, cleared my agenda & went up with him.  ;D
   Unfortunately, the day ended up not living up to its potential. The park was swarmed (even though it was a weekday) with zillions of idiot college kids on their spring break. Foolish mortals...  :P  Maybe we were the foolish mortals for not foreseeing this.  :-[
   Anywho, after just 3 rides, we left. Just as we were leaving our tram in the parking lot, however, my boyfriend hit his head on one of the tram's metal railings. He's been a jerk ever since.  >:(  :'(  hehehe Perhaps if I were to hit him in the head with something equally as hard, he'd be nice again. *evil grimmace* Man, I'm such a punk.  ;D

Anyway, the fitness routine is going well. My arms are feeling tighter & more defined already...and it hasn't even been a week yet.
   Diet is another story...not that I'm on one. Today I've eaten nothing but crap & am sooo not proud of it...not that I'm proud of anything. And today, a co-worker gave me a sundae from McDonald's...not that I minded.  ;D  Hopefully dinner will change this pattern. That or I'll just down a box of Fire Hot Tamales and crash for the night.  :P  Whatever.

Alright, I'm going to finish things up here and then head home. Working late is so cool because I don't get stuck in rush-hour traffic!  ;D

Peace out.

Haven't bought any new hair products in awhile. I consider this an exercise in restraint. Forcing myself to just use what I have until it's all gone.
   My boyfriend is helping with that, too. He's using the remnants of my Herbal Essences because he normally uses Fruit Fusions anyway. His hair is exactly what Herbal Essences makes of it. It has that verrry soft, silky, but hard at the same time feel. But the shampoo totally dries out his scalp & gives him bad dandruff. The conditioner also burns the back of his neck the same way it does with me. So there's nothing wrong with my skin after all. I guess Herbal Essences just does that!  :(

When we went out (yeah, you read that right...WE WENT OUT!!!) to dinner last night, he actually received a hair compliment and then some! Granted, this came from my sister who works at the restaurant that we went to. But she came over and told him that his hair looks so good now that it's growing out. She also told him that he & I are a beautiful couple. She was just full of compliments last night.  ;D *sigh* That girl is still my ray of sunshine.

Anywho, as for me, I'm still using Pantene Restoratives, but am gradually tiring of it. I guess the thing is...my fine hair needs a conditioning shampoo in order to combat the tangles. An opaque crème-type shampoo, rather than the transparent gel forms. The gels never fail to let my hair tangle, and where there are tangles, there is inevitable breakage...that's exactly what caused so much damage to my hair before.

When I was younger, I used Suave S & C, brushed my hair when it was wet, left my hair down all day and just ripped right through the tangles with a brush. I washed it in hot/warm water and sometimes used a blowfryer...sometimes styling products.  :P  Needless to say, I had a lot of split ends during that time. Dyeing it black and bright red on occasion didn't help things, either.

I wonder what faux pas I'm doing now that I'll look back on in the future and cringe. "Why oh why did I ever give into the fragrances of Herbal Essences? And did I seriously use a wall-mounted showerhead? What was I thinking?!"  ::)

Anyway...I need to clarify in a few days, so that means getting some vinegar on my next grocery run. Hopefully that will be today or tomorrow.
   The only question is.....do I keep using Restoratives after that, or do I go back to one of the basic lines? And if I go back, do I pawn the rest of my Restoratives bottles off on my boyfriend? *chuckle* Poor guy. He gets all of my reject stuff... that's not to say that I have poor taste.

So yeah, it's Easter Sunday and what am I doing? NOTHING! With the exception of making up some mac & cheese for lunch. That's right...no church, no family gatherings, no honey baked hams  :P  just me and my eeevil heathen gypsy self. I might stop by my parents' place if I go into East County today to shop. Other than that, just bummin'.... I'm still wearing my pj's and last night's makeup  :P  and it's past noon! Bleagh. I hate being disgusted with myself, even if it is nothing new.  :P

Anywho, time to fix that & start getting stuff done. Hopefully my hair won't tangle too much in the process.
Peace!

Perhaps you can slake your lust for the fragrance of HE by blending e.o.'s or finding a perfume that's close to the smell.  Then you can have the fragrance without the irritation?

I understand--just thought I'd offer!   :)

I appreciate it, Trisha.  ;)

Sakina: That's a good suggestion. I do know where to get some candles that smell exactly like Herbal Essences. But as far as a perfume or something...that might make the problem worse because I would want my hair to smell the same way. So it all matches. I know, I'm just weird!  :P
   The way I see it, I need to find a fragrance (or collection of them) that smells way better than HE, so I will no longer pine for it. And I have some ideas for that as well......

Anywho, I've pretty much decided that I can't take Pantene Restoratives anymore. Oh the formulas are fine, but the tangles that result are not.  :(
   I have more or less decided to go back to Pantene's main lines. Either Daily Moisture Renewal or Classic Care. I might even try out the light brown Expressions line, as I've heard good things about it.
   Slap me on the wrist, Maggie. I deserve it.  :-[  :P  ;)

This morning, I walked into the bathroom to discover that my boyfriend had been using my Conair seamless comb.  :-/  Now, I don't mean to sound possessive, but I just generally don't like it when he uses my stuff. Without my permission, that is. I know, I'm terrible and selfish and an awful, awful girlfriend.  :-[  :(    But for one, he smokes, so I don't like him touching my stuff. Even if he has just taken a shower. I mean, that putrid stench is still on his hands and in his pores even afterward.
   For two, he either loses or breaks almost everything he touches. We all pay good money for our combs, brushes and hairtoys, don't we? And I certainly can't afford to be replacing them all the time. Somethings cannot be replaced.
   Yes, I know. See above: terrible, selfish, awful girlfriend. We've established this.  :P

So, I did what would come naturally to any woman in this situation and cleaned like the fury!! I washed my seamless comb and was inspired from there.
   I emptied out my oil spray bottle and washed all of its components. Then dried and refilled it with one part baby oil and the rest water. See, it previously had an olive-oil/water mix in it, which was really doing nothing for my hair...except making it very greasy.

After that, I made a 1L vinegar rinse and cleared every product from the shower. I then wiped down the rim of the tub where most of my hair products, etc. sit and placed only what I needed on it.
   Today, I will clarify with Pantene Purity shampoo and my vinegar rinse, and follow with the Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner.
   As far as leave-in's go, I'll do the usual Light Spray Conditioner, but lighten up on the Daily Renewal Treatment.

I was going to do a deep conditioning treatment this morning, but I've pretty much decided that I can no longer endure the tangles & snapping caused by Restoratives. They're still good products, just too expensive and too light for my hair.

Strength training is going pretty well so far. I'm already noticing a difference in my arms and it's only been 10 days.  :)  I can't believe I'm almost 1/3 of the way done...or that I've been consistent for this long. I'm quite anti-commitment when it comes to exercise, so this is rather surprising. Maybe I'm more committed than I thought. Or maybe I was just thoroughly disgusted with what my previous meds had done to me. With the shape that they had left me in. Maybe I just missed my rock & roll figure and was determined to get it back (I am).  ;)
   In any case, it's going well. I know it's going to be a loooong uphill battle, but if I can keep my current perspective about it, I should succeed.

Oh yeah, I also went on a total grocery run yesterday, so eating garbage all day long is a thing of the past.  ;D

With any luck, my hair will respond to all of this positive change. Not to mention, the weather is warming up and the days are getting longer. I hate that, but it's the only way my hair grows. *sigh* Can't we all just get along?

That begs the question: What is it exactly that causes hair to grow during the warmer months? Is it the heat or the light?

Ah well. That's all for now. I must get ready for work.
Lay-tah!

Alright. I give. I accept that I am a hopeless flake & may never settle on one S & C. But maybe that's OK.
 
Today I clarified again....this time with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, Clean-Rinsing conditioner and a vinegar rinse in a 1L Fiji water bottle.
   I used the Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner, too, before detangling with my RS #45. After the length started to dry, I sprayed the ends with my baby oil/water mix.
   My hair dried much faster than it does when I use Pantene. *raises eyebrow* Hmmmm....

What's more...when it was totally dry, I took a BBB that I'd stashed in my purse and ran it through my hair one small section at a time, from the bottom up. Then I ran my Conair Velvet purse brush through it....man, did it feel satiny!  ;D
   I put it up in a looped ponytail before too long, though, just to keep myself from playing with it too much.  ::)

Tonight, when I took my hair out of the loop, I was shocked to discover that it wasn't the least bit tangled!
   I'm going to use the Rainforest Flowers Replenishing S & C that I bought after work today & see if the same thing happens. *crosses fingers* This could be good!

Anyway, I must work early tomorrow, so the sooner I get to bed, the better. 'Night!

As planned, I used my new red Rainforest Flowers S & C this morning. Shampooed and conditioned twice each...and my hair still felt quite soft and smooth as the water cascaded down the length.
   The regular Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner was my only leave-in before detangling. I had to oil before the ends were really ready for it because I was running late, but everything worked out OK. The ends didn't suffer (one side did get a little over-oiled, but no biggie) and I made it to work on time.  ;D

In a short amount of time, yet again, my hair was completely dry, so I took my BBB out of my purse and ran it through my hair. Followed with my Conair Velvet purse brush, just like yesterday. And again, my hair felt (and smelled) great! I put it up in a looped ponytail with a velvet scrunchie, and it has been that way ever since.
   Well, except when I took it down for a bit after washing my face, but even then, I was able to run my new Conair seamless comb through it no problem. No tangles!!!  :D
   I am shocked and pleased and possibly converted. Maybe there's something to gel formulas after all.  ;D

I've been fighting the urge to measure my hair until the first of May. If my hair has grown at all this month, I don't want to ruin the surprise. Plus, a watched pot never boils. I would rather see all of this month's growth at one time, rather than agonizing over the slightest bit of growth every few days. Does anyone else think this way?

One thing I've noticed about Herbal Essences is that it seems to make my hair shinier than Pantene did. Or at least it looks that way today. Who would've thought?

Well, I don't want to ruin a good thing, so I'll try not to count my chickens before they hatch.  :P  Ugh, my mother always used that expression!  ::)  My point is that I don't want to jinx anything. I'm just going to ride this wave for all it's worth and hope that I (or my hair) won't be spit back onto the sand. Er...obscure boogie boarding references....ugh!  :-/

Yeah, so...life. Or the complete lack thereof.
   I've changed my avatar and text yet again. Oooooooh.  ::)

Right now I'm doing just one load of laundry...MINE! HA!
   I haven't seen my boyfriend all day. *eye-freaking-roll* After staying up all night playing online poker with his friends, he finally went to bed at around 4 am.  >:(
   I had to be up at 5:15, so I totally appreciated being woken up when he came in. Not.  >:(  In any case, the alarm went off right on schedule, but I didn't stop it. My boyfriend tried to (I think), but all he did was pull the alarm clock off of his dresser and wrestle with it, pushing every bloody button on its surface except the one that would stop the alarm. Freaking A, why are men so retarded when they're tired?! I swear, this is the 2nd guy I have known to do stuff like this!  ::)  Now that I think about it, it actually seems kinda funny, but at the time, I was like, OMG - are you kidding me?!  :-/
   My boyfriend never replaced the alarm clock on his dresser, but instead dozed off again while still holding it next to him. Not wanting to get up yet, I laid there for about 10 minutes myself, until the alarm went off again.
   Same as before, he woke up and started furiously pressing buttons in an incoherent stupor before I finally just reached over him and turned the blasted thing off myself. Oy.
   With that, I was up as I have been ever since. Before I left for work was the last time I saw my beloved today. I tried calling him after I came home, but got no answer. *shrug* Alright.
   From the absence of his disc golf bag, I conclude that that is what he's been out doing. From the fact that he's been gone for over 6 hours, I conclude that disc golf isn't all. Perhaps he got some last-minute side work. *sarcastic laugh*

Anywho, whatever. That's about all I can say. He's a big boy whether or not he chooses to act like one, so I wash my hands of it and choose to focus on myself. Speaking of which, it's past 6:30...dinner time.  ;D  Chicken soup, anyone?

Today was another red Rainforest Flowers day.  :)

Washed once with the Replenishing shampoo and then left Pantene's Intensive Restoration Treatment in for almost 2 hours. After rinsing that out, I chased it with the Replenishing Rainforest Flowers conditioner.

Today's leave-in was Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner again. It's nice being down to only one leave-in. Especially one that contains less oil than all of Pantene's. I think that helps a lot.

Just oiled a few seconds ago. I think my oil mix is starting to turn...will have to make another one soon. Perhaps not before I send the spray bottle and its components through the dishwasher.

I like the way that my hair takes less time to dry when I use Herbal Essences vs. Pantene. There's far less "down time" air drying before I can put it up in a bun or looped ponytail.
   On the subject of updo's, I wish I was more proficient in creating them. French twists are my favourite, but I can never seem to do them right. It's not that I have anything against my velour scrunchies. I just would like to be able to do something besides the cliché ballerina bun and looped ponytail. The latter especially is so jr. high!  :P

My hair is getting longer. I've been noticing it for awhile now.  :)  Sometimes I feel it brush against my arms when they're bare. Sometimes I feel the ends on my back in the shower. But it's definitely getting longer. Even my, er..."boyfriend" (and I use that term loosely) has noticed. Ohh I do hope that I am able to reach my short term goal this year. I hope I hope I hope!!
   I'm not scheduling a trim until July. That will be 6 months after my last trim. I don't have any splits and the ends aren't horridly dry yet...of course, it's still only April.  :-/ I'm going on 4 months since my last trim. Not too much longer.

Strength training is still going well. I've been diligent about it every day, sometimes even extending or adding to the routine (or both). I like to think that my high school body is still hiding under there somewhere and I'm determined to get it back. Or at least as close to it as I can get.
   Tomorrow will mark 2 weeks that I've been on this little program. The day after that will be the halfway point. Man, I hope I stick with this.
   Next month is going to be the toughest. After the arms comes the abs and while that's my favourite area to work, the training will also be the most intense.  :-/

Well that's about it for now. Other than my rat "boyfriend" finally going to bed at 8:00 this morning, after I was already up & treating my hair. That's a new record for him. Ugh. But that's what the quotes are about. If he's not going to act the part, he's not going to have the part. Pish.  :P

Anywho, work awaits....and today is payday! Woohoo!  ;D

I've been reading through your past posts to catch up and wanted to give my late, but heartfelt condolences about your grandmother. I hope you and your family are doing well.

I also wanted to give my opinion. You can take this or leave it. I don't even know if it's my business. If it's not, tell me off and I won't mention it again: Your relationship with your boyfriend doesn't sound all that healthy. He doesn't seem to have his life together enough to be spoiling yours. You may want to consider giving him some space (physically at least) to consider where his priorities are and if he can get his life/attitude/personal priorities (who he wants to spend time with) etc. straightened out. This is only from what I've read in your posts. I may be in the wrong. That's your call. I just think that you could be doing so much better if you both had your space and he wasn't always ruining your day.

On a lighter note, good to hear your hair is growing daily closer to your goal. Keep it up and it will surprise you one day.
In all humility,
Meg

Work was nuts yesterday. Paychecks were delayed and had to be sent by a different carrier, who got the zip code wrong. A supervisor had to chase the delivery truck all over San D, hold them up and race back to my building to deliver them. Then I, of course, had to sort through them. Meanwhile, everyone kept asking, "Are they here yet?" and "Can I just have mine now?" and the phone rang incessantly.
   I sorted through payroll faster than I ever had before, made sure everyone got a check, notified supervisors of their arrival and simultaneously dealt with customers on the phone. Whew!  :P

After clocking out, locking up the building and depositing my check, I drove out to East County to wash my car after months of neglect.  :P  :P  :P
   After 6 hours of cleaning, it looks pretty good. My parents even bought me some sweet new floormats, as my old ones were royally trashed.  8)  The trunk & backseat still need work, but all in all, it looks much better than it did. Mercedes' are just the kind of cars that should never be unkepmt. They have too much prestige for that.

Last night, I found myself wondering whether it might not be better just to fix the car that I have, rather than buying a new one. Granted, it would likely be a short-time fix. I could invest in fixing it up, making it gorgeous, but how long before that $10K engine knocks out? Things to consider...

Anyway, kept my hair back in the looped ponytail all day. Even while washing my car. At night, when I took it down for bed, it combed out nicely - no tangles! I was impressed.  ;D  I surrender to the power of herbal.

As predicted, my beau was still awake when I returned home. Playing online poker until the ungodly hours of dawn. Without a word, I just went straight to bed. It had been an exhausting day.
   He finally crashed at 4 am.


Quote:

I also wanted to give my opinion. You can take this or leave it. I don't even know if it's my business. If it's not, tell me off and I won't mention it again

lol You're so sweet, Meg. Telling anyone off just isn't my style.  8)  ;)  Everyone's entitled to their opinion.
   Where he's concerned, I've already distanced myself physically and emotionally. If he wants my love, trust and respect, he'll earn it.
   And thank you so much for your condolences. The family and I are doing alright, though any mention of my grandmother still tears us up somewhat.  :'(  Last I heard, my grandfather will be coming down in a few months and staying for awhile. He's going to help my parents redo their entire kitchen.  :o

Hair: I have a mayo treatment in right now. In an hour or so, I'll take a shower and immerse myself in the goodness of Rainforest Flowers.  ;D  I think I'll do another treatment then too...Pantene's Intensive Moisturizing Mask.

Exercise: Today marks 2 weeks that I've been working on my arms. They still feel tighter. I've recently increased the amount of reps from 10 to 13. My biceps are subtly getting bigger. Tri's are still nowhere near what they were in high school.  :(  Curse you, Ortho Tri-Cyclen! Curse you infinitely!!!
   Ah well. I'm not even halfway done yet. There's still time to improve.

Other: I'll likely go back into East County today to finish my car. Being able to see things during the day - especially in overcast, diffused lighting - helps a great deal.

Well, that's about all for now. Late.

Today marks the halfway point in my exercise. Woohoo! This also means keeping the reps between 13 and 15. Hope I can do it!

Washed once with Rainforest Flowers Replenishing shampoo today, then left Pantene's Intensive Moisturizing Mask in for over an hour. After rinsing it out, I chased it with Rainforest Flowers Replenishing conditioner. Oh, it burned.  :(  But that was probably because I washed twice yesterday. That tends to dry out my skin.  :(
   Today, I decided to try the new bottle of Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner that I had sitting under the bathroom sink. Big surprise: it's different!! Instead of a thin stream, it now actually sprays out! It smells the same, but now contains even less oil than before.  :D  Dig that.
   Oiled the ends as usual today. I'm finally getting back into the habit of it.

Chips are still down on the "relationship" front. I'm not sure why I even bother using that word...it's not like we have one anymore.  :(  Things would be so much different if I were independently wealthy....er, I mean financially independent.  8)

Hair: Washed once again today with my Rainforest Flowers shampoo. I worry a little bit more every day because of it. The back of my neck is starting to dry out again.  :-/
   For now, I'm trying to shampoo only once at a time to see if that will help. If it doesn't, then the formulas are still too harsh for me, and I will have to move on...again.

Treating yet again this morning. This time with Pantene's Intensive Restoration Treatment from the DMR line. After I rinse this out, I'll follow with the matching Rainforest Flowers conditioner & hope it doesn't burn too much.  :-/

I'm starting to care less about fragrances, I think. At least in hair products. It seems that no matter what I use, the scent always fades away eventually, and my hair ends up smelling like funky carrots anyway.

Exercise: So I'm finally past the halfway point - woohoo!  ;D  I've also moved my routine from my bed to the weight bench, since a more solid surface seems to add to the resistance.
   Everything is still at 13 reps. That might just have to do. I'm anxious to start ab training, but still have 2 weeks of arms left to do.

Other: Have renewed my fascination with Jessica McClintock. Her "New Victorian" line is right up my gothic little alley. Oh, my next paycheck cannot arrive soon enough!!!  ;)

So your hair is, what?  --Around 21 inches, right?  I think we're around the same length   :)  ...and you wash your hair every day?  Washing every day doesn't hurt it--doesn't dry it out or anything?  The reason I ask is because I'm not sure I like this wash-every-other-day routine.  I mean it's okay but I've always been a wash-every-day kind of gal and it's been hard changing habit.  You're also tempting me to try Herbal Essence shampoo, girl!!!  Is this Rainforest Flowers s+c you've been talking about in the HE line??  Cause I'm thinking I may have to switch!!    ::)

For some reason, Herbal Essences just never seemed to do it for my hair.  I loooooooove the way it smells, but it alway left my hair kind of weighed down and dull, whereas the Pantene leaves my hair feeling light and shiny.  Every so often I'm drawn back into the lure of HE, I always want to try it again, just to make sure it doesn't work for me I guess.  :-/

See, now after talking about it I want to try it again.  No, no, no!  :-X

Quote:

So your hair is, what?  --Around 21 inches, right?  I think we're around the same length     ...and you wash your hair every day?  Washing every day doesn't hurt it--doesn't dry it out or anything?  The reason I ask is because I'm not sure I like this wash-every-other-day routine.  I mean it's okay but I've always been a wash-every-day kind of gal and it's been hard changing habit.

That's right. It's about 21 ¼ inches right now, fine, thin and naturally straight...and yes, I wash every single day. Not just because my scalp/skin is naturally very oily, but also because I enjoy it. I love the fragrances & the feeling of being clean. Plus, with all that your hair encounters on a daily basis, I think it's gross not to.  :P  Of course, that's just me.


Quote:

You're also tempting me to try Herbal Essence shampoo, girl!!!  Is this Rainforest Flowers s+c you've been talking about in the HE line??  Cause I'm thinking I may have to switch!!  ::)

lol Well, I have to say...I used Herbal Essences' classic line for years before switching to Pantene about 6 years ago. I was a bona fide Pantene addict and bought just about every product that they made. I was totally hooked on their Daily Moisture Renewal line and used it since it was very first launched. hahaha This is starting to sound like a Pantene-aholics Anonymous meeting or something.  ::)
   Anyway, something changed recently...be it my hair or the DMR formulas, I don't know. But I decided to go back and try Herbal Essences again, seeing as I could never be free from the lure of their fragrances!!  ;D  ;)
   Lo and behold, I settled on the Rainforest Flowers Replenishing S & C...and it works like a charm! At least so far. I'm really glad for it, too, because it just generally works better for me in all areas. It's much less expensive than Pantene, it doesn't weigh my hair down with excessive cones and conditioners, the leave-in conditioner contains way less oil than any of Pantene's leave-in's...even the bottles are prettier.  ;)  I am just loving it so far.

No, it doesn't dry my hair out, but it does dry out the back of my neck a bit. Especially if I shampoo twice. But a dab of oil-free lotion & I'm good to go.
   Also, it helps if I oil just the tips of my hair every day to moisturize/protect/combat tangles. Being that I have very fine, thin hair, it tangles easily. I haven't had a problem with that with Herbal Essences lately...at least, so far.  :)

So yeah, HE all the way. It's working well for me. I'm hooked.  8)

Magz: I totally know what you mean! At least for the most part. I used to swear by Pantene and for a long while, it was the only thing that worked for me.
   My experiences were just the opposite, though: I found that Herbal Essences made my hair too light, and my hair was dependent on the cones & conditioners in Pantene. I came to rely on the "heaviness" of it. But over time, I guess things just got too heavy. My faithful DMR formulas built up on my scalp, rendering it extremely greasy. If I used it more than 3 days in a row, it would look like I hadn't washed my hair in a week.  :P  I think that all of P & G's formulas underwent recent revisions.

Anyway, my Pantene items are shelved for the time being, as I'm happy with what I'm using now.  :)  

Hair: Washed twice today with Rainforest Flowers Replenishing shampoo. My hair didn't need it, but I'm running out of conditioner much faster...guess I felt the need to "compensate" this morning.
   Conditioned once with Rainforest Flowers Replenishing conditioner and put on my bright purple shower cap while attending to my other "shower duties." After finishing all of that, I removed the cap and rinsed out the conditioner. Then I chased that with another (smaller) dose of conditioner, and rinsed. Just for extra softness, I suppose.
   The usual Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner today. I've actually been using the new & old formulas simultaneously, just to help drain the old bottle faster. Out with the old, in with the new.
   Detangled with my RS #45 as usual before frantically throwing things into my purse to prepare to leave for work. I didn't have time to oil while I was home, so I tossed my oil spray and RS #32 into my purse and took them with me to the office, so I could just oil after I arrived.
   I made it on time, thankfully. Just in time to let the Operations Manager and IT Manager in through the front door. After clocking in, I dashed to the ladies' room and oiled the ends of my hair.
   Unfortunately, in my mad rush to leave the apartment on time, I forgot my velour scrunchie, so I ended up leaving my hair down for the entire shift.  :-/

After leaving work, I headed out once again to the area where I grew up so I could get some shopping done. The sky was covered in clouds of various shades of gray. It's been trying to rain here for the past 3 days...unsuccessfully so far.  :(
   I grabbed "lunch" from Starbucks - a tall decaf mocha and a slice of reduced fat cinnamon coffee cake - and ate it at one of the tables outside.
   Across the way from me, at another table, 3 women sat smoking and talking, with their children around (poor kids). One was just a baby. The other was an adorable little girl with a long ponytail, about the same colour as mine. I watched her for awhile as she played with her toys on the rocks and with the plants surrounding her mother's table. Lost in her own little world. God, to be that young again!
   To be so enraptured with small parts of your environment that they seem huge. Small puddles become great, beautiful lakes. Little ravines become winding, treacherous rivers and simple backyard gardens become exotic rainforests. Forgetting everything else is inevitable when you're living vicariously through your toys. There's such an innocence of imagination there. I'd give anything to be able to do that again. To live so much in a single moment that everything else disappears.
   As I got up to head to the store across the parking lot, I smiled down at the little girl as I passed her. Of course, she took no notice...nor would I have at that age. *sigh*

Finding myself yet again at Target, I picked up only what I needed: facewash, shampoo & conditioner for myself and shampoo & conditioner for the boyfriend. Mine are Herbal Essences Replenishing, his are Fruit Fusions Hydrating.

Exercise: In a few days, I will have wrapped up my 3rd week of arm training. It surprises me that I've actually stuck to the routine every day.
   There are blisters forming on my hands from gripping that dumbell all the time, and my muscles are slightly sore and quite exhausted. But...I did say muscles.  ;)

Other: My beau and I have worked our recent probs out...kind of. He still spends ungodly hours glued to the computer playing online poker with his friends...while talking on the phone with them at the same time. But now he saves that mainly for while I'm at work.
   Yesterday, he won tickets to the Coachella Music Festival in Indio, which takes place this weekend. This time, he actually wanted me to go. But as psyched as I was to do so, I cannot.  :'(  3 days in the desert without a shower, with dirty, drunk and high kids is bad enough...but impossible while Aunt Flo is scheduled to visit. No thanx.  :P
   So he's going alone, and I not only have that to worry about, but also where he's going to come up with rent, which is due upon his return. He still isn't working, and I only have half. *sigh*

Anyway, that's all for now. Peace.

Hey, Moonshine.  If I may, I suggest keeping a spare scrunchie in the glove box.  ;)

Sorry you can't go to the festival.  The radio station I listen to is giving lots of tickets away.  I love live music, but (maybe this is my age showing) I'm not sure I'd be up for the physicality of it.

Any chance you can get yourself a pair of lifting gloves?  It will prevent blisters and is a big help when you go up in weight-it gets harder not to hold the weight so tight while maintaining your form which will tear up your skin.  Keep up the good work!

ditto on those lifting gloves,but make sure they are fingerless and extra padding in the palms.

lol Moonshine...I like it.  ;)

Sadly, I cannot keep anything in my car's glove box, as it is still soiled from many a coffee spill. Long story.  ::)

Rent is due in 2 days and I have to overdraw my account in order to pay it.  :(  Needless to say, I won't be spending $$ on anything for awhile! Ah well...another check will be coming soon. 'Tis the benefit of having 2 jobs.

The blisters on my hands are starting to fade and turn into light calluses, anyway. Ha. Just like with guitar.

Anywho...I did it!! Successfully finished week #3 of arm training!  ;D  Only 9 more days of this. I'm ready for it to be over...and yet, I'm not. Either my eyes deceive me, or there is definitely more definition to my arms now. I don't have the kind of muscles that bulk up or anything, but there are definitely little bumps where they are. Lines are clearer, arms are tighter.
   It's funny. When I first got the idea to do this, I thought to myself, well...in a month, you can have the same arms that you have now...or you can have better. So I chose to act and don't regret that decision at all. If I didn't do anything to reclaim my body after meds messed it up, that would have been letting the meds win. I shall not surrender!

In hair news, yesterday, I washed once with the usual Rainforest Flowers, then followed with Pantene's Intensive Moisturizing Mask for an hour. After rinsing it out, I chased it with Rainforest Flowers conditioner as usual. Then detangled & oiled the ends...a little too heavily. Had to put my hair up in a velour scrunchie bun.
   When I took it down before bed, it smelled so weird! Not like Rainforest Flowers at all!  :-/

We had a going away party/potluck for the District Manager at job #1 yesterday. He doesn't actually leave until next Friday, but I'm going to miss that guy just the same.  :(  He has a great, laid-back managerial style that works better for all of us. He realizes that he can't be everywhere at once, and if there's a problem, he lets you come to him.
   His replacement is the exact opposite. The micro-manager who hangs over everyone's shoulder, critiquing their every move. At least, this is what I have heard. He has worked at our location before and earned quite a reputation in the process. But I'm not one to judge. I don't know the guy & haven't really seen him in action yet.
   Plus, I'm not worried about it. I celebrate 1 year with Airgas on Tuesday. Woohoo! I'm not sure how much longer I will stay there. I need full-time work (or at least full-time pay  ;)).

One of the fillers in the Industrial department died at 8:30 on Thursday night. He was not yet 60 years old. Apparently, he had been battling pneumonia for 2 weeks, and also had emphysema. That right there is an argument for not smoking. I want to share this story with my boyfriend when he returns.

Also, payroll screwed up again and a lot of people who got live checks on Friday had their checks bounce. This happened in February also.  >:(  >:(  >:(  I was one of those lucky few...and rent is due on the 1st. Yay!
   Fortunately, they issued good checks to us yesterday. The bank didn't even put a hold on mine. So now I can almost make rent.  :-/

About halfway through my shift, one of the Industrial guys came up and just started chatting with the Cylinder Control Specialist and myself. Working with 90% men is so much fun! I swear, it's like being put up for sale in a meat market for every drooling idiot to ogle.  >:(
   Don't get me wrong, I love my co-workers. But no one is entirely discreet when they're "interested." Even on a purely physical level. Especially men.
   Usually, I make small talk brief because my phone could ring at any time. When that happens, people usually just walk away. But this guy actually hung around in my office, waited for me to finish the call and engaged me again in meaningless chatter. It was awkward. And he's certainly not the first guy to do this. Ugh!  ::)

I know how they "see" me...the cute little receptionist who's relatively new to the company and can't be any more than 19 years old. HA! The male "mentality" - I can't stand it! I've wanted to goth it up more at work. The naive part of me wants to believe that less people would be "interested" if they knew I was goth. Of course, I also know that this might only make things worse. You think I was born yesterday?
   I make no apologies for what I merely observe. If someone wants to interpret it as male-bashing and be offended by it, let 'em. But no one would be offended by it if they weren't guilty of something...eh??

Anywho, I have no idea what to do with my hair today. To treat or not to treat? I can't wait to measure on the 1st. For weeks, I've been wondering how much (if any) growth I've gotten lately, with the weather warming up and all. heh With the exception of the past several days, which have been very cloudy and cool. I love that kind of weather...but I also want my hair to grow.

Peace!

Finished my red Rainforest Flowers bottles yesterday. This morning, I decided that I didn't care for the "thin" feeling that it left my hair with, so...... *sigh*

Today I did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo and a vinegar rinse. Then followed with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Didn't cap today...just simply rinsed the conditioner out after a few minutes.

No leave-in's, no wet combing...just separated the wet strands by hand. I still don't think my hair is quite dry yet, but man, it's frizzzzzzy!!  :P  Yes, we straight-haired's get the frizzies too. Blugh.

Waiting for me tomorrow, I have the diluted remains of a Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal 2 in 1, and my same DMR conditioner. Let's see how this goes.  ::)  I don't want to drop tons of $$$ on new hair stuff right now.

That said, I did pick up a bottle of Suave lavender & lilac conditioner to use after my DMR conditioner. If I use it on my whole head, it may help with the greasy roots problem that the DMR 2 in 1 is known to cause.

My boyfriend is having fun in Indio. Last night, he went gambling with his friends and grandmother, and won $210 playing Texas Hold 'Em.  :)  So we're ok on rent....this month.
   Madonna should be going onstage out there in a few minutes, and Tool follows. *sigh* I still kind of wish that I could have gone...but there will be other shows, of course.

What bothers me most about all of this is the loneliness. I keep reminding myself that it's not any different than usual....he's never here even when he is here. Still....I can't help but miss that wayward punk.  ::)
   hahaha As I'm typing this, Hank Williams' "I'm So Lonesome, I Could Cry" comes on the radio. Perfect timing, whoever was responsible...  ;)
   Anyway, I accidentally made enough spaghetti for 2 tonight (oops). Out of habit, I guess. Anybody hungry? The sauce is vegetarian, don't worry.  ::)

Anyway, can't think of anything else to write, other than I hope my Jessica McClintock skirt arrives soon!!  ;D

Laterz.

Woohoo! It's measuring day!  :D  I wonder if my hair will be dry before I have to leave for work. It would be a bummer to have to go all day and night working with my hair down before I had the chance to measure. Perhaps I'll stand outside for awhile...even though it's overcast.  :-/

My boyfriend is due back in the late afternoon or evening. I can't wait to see him, and I know the feeling is mutual.  :)  I just hope to God that he didn't do anything stupid/illegal. Last night, a friend of mine said, "Just try to trust him." His words keep echoing in my mind.

According to plan, I washed today with my diluted Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal 2 in 1. Surprise: no greasy roots! The last time I used it, I had the "greasy roots" feeling after just 1 washing.
   After that, I put Pantene's Intensive Restoration Treatment in, capped, and I now have less than half of an hour before I can rinse it out.
   When I do, I'll simply follow with my new Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner & call it good.

I hope I'll have time to actually put on some makeup today. That'd be nice. I haven't worn any in the longest time.  :-[  Maybe my hair will dry completely while I'm doing that.

In other news: Only a week left with my arm training. I am sooo glad that I chose to do this! My arms are indeed looking better than they did at this time last month, and I'm up to 18 reps now!  :D  So much for atrophy! Now, if I can only get the rest of my body to comply.

I now have 2 Jessica McClintock orders in the works. What a rush! I've never bought anything from a real designer before...well, unless you count bebe, but that's more of a high-dollar chain, I suppose.  ::)  Weeeeeeee!! Expensive Victorian spoils!!  ;D

Alright, it's just about time to rinse. Catch y'all on the flip side.

Well, day 3 washing with my diluted Daily Moisture Renewal 2 in 1 found me again with greasy roots, so today I clarified.

I washed once with Herbal Essences clarifying shampoo, rinsed, poured on my vinegar rinse, rinsed that, washed once more with my Herbal Essences clarifying shampoo and rinsed again. Hair was suuuper squeaky clean, but fragile.
   I followed with the matching Herbal Essences clean-rinsing conditioner, rinsed out after a few minutes, capped my hair and went about the rest of my shower. After that was done (and it takes awhile!), I conditioned a second time with the HE clean-rinsing conditioner. Hair smells heavenly!  ;D

No leave-in's or oil or anything today. Just let my hair air dry at the office, separating the wet strands whenever my hands were free.
   Today was a good day to clarify, since I had the early morning shift.  :P

On the subject of work, there is absolutely no shortage of it these days. Both of my jobs are getting progressively more demanding, and my shifts grow longer. Arrive extra early at the 1st, stay extra late at the 2nd...  :P
   That might be a good thing if 1.) it didn't cut into everything else that I need to do, and 2.) I was going to reap any financial benefits from it.
   Alas, every cent I'll get tomorrow (pay day) is already spoken for.  :'(

Life is pulling at me from all different directions now. Everyone and everything require more than I actually have to give to them, be it my jobs, my boyfriend, my bills, etc. etc. etc.....and it's really beginning to take a toll. I'm beyond burned out. To the point that I just kind of don't care about anything anymore.  :-/

In other hair news, I've been suppressing the urge to dye my hair some dark, gothly colour - like plum or burgundy. Herbal Essences has a new line called Colorflirt with no ammonia or peroxide, and only lasts about a week. A Level 1 type.
   The colours are great - I'd love to try them, but I know that's bad.  :(

My Jessica McClintock skirt arrived yesterday.  :D  It's a bit fuller and more formal than I expected, but absolutely gorgeous nonetheless! Definitely one of the most beautiful pieces I have ever bought.
   I got to try it on last night (like I'd been dying to do all day while I was at work) and surprise, surprise....it fits perfectly! A personal tailour could not have done a better job. The waist is perfect, the length is perfect (right down to my toes, even when I wear heels) and that lovely swish of real taffeta when I walk...  ;)

I have a few more items coming. *chortle* Building credit was never so much fun.  ;D

Still doing ok on the arm training front. Today, I did chair dips and wall push-ups in addition to the usual stuff. Only 4 more days. I think I've pretty much gone as far as this light training stuff will get me. My reclaimed muscles are solid to the touch now when I flex them. heh Hopefully I'll be able to do as much for the rest of my body.

Alright...that's all for now.

"I'll see you all a little later."

Good luck on the whole "spending money as it comes in thing". I'm doing something similar.
Your skirt sounds so wonderful.  :D Do you think we could get a picture?
Meg

hehe Thanx, Meg.  ;)  I really wish I had a digicam! I'd be posting pix like a nut if I did. *sigh* Maybe on one of these paychecks....  ???

Got a call from a rep at JMC today regarding my next order. Apparently there was a glitch on their website and, long story short, I'm going to have to cancel said order.  >:(  Grrrrrrrrr! I was so looking forward to this one, too!  >:(
   Ah well. There will be more in the future, no doubt.

My "boyfriend" and I have finally hit the wall. The details are too personal and difficult to explain, but "the end" that everyone knew was inevitable is drawing very near. There is simply no way to repair the recent damages. At least no way that I can see, and at this point, it just isn't worth trying. I'm done.

The vet has given the family dog 2-4 weeks to live.  :'(  Just seeing him in his current condition tears me up. The leg with the bone cancer in it is badly swollen and useless. He can't walk on it. It's hard for him to move or breathe...he is never comfortable. He's dying...and so am I. Seeing him this way kills me. Why do the worst things always have to happen to the best people?
   He's such a happy dog. More than that, he's a happy soul...someone who just loves life and is very easy to please. The simplest things in life make him extremely happy. He doesn't deserve what's happening to him.
   Neither did my first dog...who also died of cancer.  :'(  My grandmother didn't deserve it either. But like I said before, life isn't fair...and neither is death.

In a way, I'm glad because this dog actually made it 10 years. My first dog was only 6 when we had to put her down.
   But I'm torn. I want to spend more time with him before he goes, but it hurts me to see him this way. And I definitely don't want to be around when the time comes to put him to sleep. Oh Lord, I couldn't take that.  :'(

All of my work is finally done at my 2nd job. For now.  :-/  But at least I get a much needed break!

In hair news, I washed twice today with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo before mixing Pantene Intensive Restoration Treatment with the last of an old bottle of HE Replenishing conditioner. I applied this conditioner blend to my hair, and left it in for an hour.
   After rinsing that out, I chased with a few other things. It all seems like a swirl of conditioners...pink, purple, white...I hardly remember just what went on. I know that I used my Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner, and finished off that bottle of HE Replenishing conditioner...and that my hair smelled and felt lovely afterwards. I guess that's what matters.  ;)

Only one leave-in today, as it should be. Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner...before detangling with my freshly washed RS #45. Oiled the ends today also, and after my hair was dry and brushed, I put it up in the usual velour scrunchie bun.

After leaving work and running a few errands, I visited my parents. My father had invited me to dinner at Claim Jumper earlier, but we ended up going to Del Taco by their house instead.
   My father again suggested that I move back in with them. Just for a year, he bargained, while I save up some money. *sigh* I think he really does miss me. Or at least he thinks he does. But my mother certainly doesn't...and that's just one of countless reasons why moving back in is not an option.

So...that's life for now. The drama continues.  :P

:'(  Hugs for you.  This has been a tough spring for you.  I hope everything eventually works out for you and you can enjoy your life.

:-[ :-[ :'( :'( (((((((((hugs)))))))) why is stress so contagious?? :-X

May God bless you, and protect you always Angel !

Thanx, BB and Beesan. ((((((((hugz 4 you both)))))))))

I don't think that my hair or skin is such a fan of Herbal Essences as my nose is.  :(  I love the fragrances, but that's about it.
   The back of my neck is beginning to dry out already. After what, 3 days? And I've noticed a dramatic increase in snapping, tangles and hairfall. OY! Why oh why can't something work?!  ???

Pantene's Daily Moisture Renewal worked great for years, and now all of a sudden it leaves me with the greasiest roots ever! I wonder what changed. Is it the 2 in 1? The Daily Renewal Treatment? All of the DMR formulas? What gives, man?

I've been thinking about switching to the Classic line. It's lighter...maybe it will work. But what do I do with all of the other stuff lying in wait under my bathroom sink? *sigh*

So ends my 4th week of arm training. I'm up to about 20 reps now on a good day. My arms are definitely tighter and more solid now, but my left bicep is noticeably more developed than my right. I find that funny/ironic, considering it was the weaker one of the 2 in the beginning. But whatever. Only 2 more days of this left and I'm sure they'll even out once I stop working them twice a day, every day. I'm sure that the blisters/calluses on my hands will disappear also.

Haven't seen my "boyfriend" all day, not that that's new. He's probably still working with his friend. Days ago, he told me that that was the plan. He has all of tomorrow free, though. I wonder what he'll do with it.
   Perhaps he'll apologize from his heart of hearts for acting like such a jerk lately. And I'll apologize, too, and then everything will be ok.
   Right. Then he'll announce that he's quit smoking and become decidedly Christian, he'll promise to never embarrass me again by drinking his face off at a party, he'll promise to never stay up all night playing online poker or ever leave me lonely again, and then, he'll drop to his knees, present a 5 carat diamond ring from Tiffany's and freaking propose. HA!
   *chuckle* Ahhh sarcasm. What better way to deal when life constantly screws you over?

At least my hair will always be there for me. Although probably not if I keep treating it the way I have been lately. I think it definitely needs a lot of cones and conditioners. That seems to be the only way to keep it from tangling hopelessly. But how to manage those greasy roots, eh? We shall see...

oh Angel!!! Big hugs to you!!!  I feel so bad,but know that you're going to be better than ever.  It hurts so much when a pet is in pain.  I know I've had many and it doesn't get easier,you just are prepared more,in a way.  It's crappy!!!!  The boyfriend,ack!  Don't even blink,just keep steppin and hold your head up high! :)

*hugs* to you, baby--do what's best for YOU and nobody else.  

((((((((((hugzzzz, Trisha & Curlgirl))))))))))))) You guys rock.  ;)

On Saturday night, I decided that I'd had enough with the tangles & hairfall, and that the following morning, I would return to the safe haven of Pantene. I guess that really is what just works best for my hair. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
   Also patched things up with the wayward beau on Saturday night. Surprise, surprise....we both apologized.  :o  My faith in miracles is restored, though he's still far from perfect. More on that later.  :P

Sunday morning, I clarified. Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse, Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, followed with my Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner. I could literally almost hear my hair say, "Ahhhhhhh...."  :)
   Sunday evening, I went to Souplantation for dinner...with my beau.  ;D

Monday, it was DMR again. The 2 in 1 and the conditioner. Light Spray Conditioner and Daily Renewal Treatment as leave-in's, and oil on the ends. This wasn't too bad for the first day, but I wouldn't want to repeat the process just yet. I think my hair still needs some "adjusting time." It's much easier going from crème formulas to gels than vice versa. If my hair is ever going to be comfortable with the DMR line again, it will have to be approached in stages. I have a plan...

After work yesterday, I ran out to the usual Target that I patronize (heh heh) in East County and bought Pantene Classic Clean shampoo, Classic Care conditioner, another Light Spray Conditioner (my current bottle is running low), the Deep Fortifying Treatment and some other stuff. Did you know that the Hershey company makes Cherry Cordial Kisses?! OMG!  :o  :D  I had to get some! And they're delish, of course!  ;)

So anyway, I used the Classic line this morning and am impressed for the most part. The conditioner is thinner than DMR, naturally, but at least my roots aren't greasy. I'll just go with this for awhile.

Oh yes...and yesterday I completed 1 month of arm training.  :D  Wooooooooooooot!!!
   My boyfriend commented this morning that my arms were "buff"...of course, this was after making fun of me yesterday for the "lightness" of the free weight that I'd been using.  >:(  Needless to say, I took his "buff" comment with a grain of salt.
   Sad little man just doesn't get it.  ::)  I'm not doing this to get "buff." I am merely trying to reclaim the figure that was destroyed by medication some years ago.
   I will say this much, though...my arms are now twice as strong as they were at this time last month. I can throw that dumbell around with ease. Er, the free weight dumbell, not my boyfriend.  ;)

Bad news for the dog, I'm afraid. My mother informed me yesterday that our formerly vivacious yellow lab is not expected to make it through the week. He sleeps a lot, barely eats and needs to be medicated 3 times a day. He can no longer live as he once did and that's horrible.  :'(  My mother says that she'll be surprised if he makes it to the weekend. It would take a miracle, I suppose...

Once again, I'm having internet problems, so my entries may be intermittent for awhile. I'm typing this at work and need to go before I run up the phone bill.  :-/
   I have ab exercises to do, lunch to make and a hair treatment to do tomorrow.

Until next time.

yay on the good stuff!  hugs to you on the not good stuff.  
Feels real good about having a month under your belt on arm work,eh?  Good for you!!!

lol Thanx, Curlgirl!  ;)

A month's work is definitely an improvement. I hope the rest of my body is as easy to reform...

it's one day at a time and when you need to rest....REST!  I speak from experience and teaching on this one!!  Sounds like you're doin fine :)

:-[ Oh, I wish there was something I could do to help you. Right now, you get a hug. <<<<<<<hug>>>>>>>>
I hope your days get better. I hope your dog doesn't suffer too much. I've lost a dog that way. It's hard. Keep going.  :-*
Meg

Thank you guys. I really appreciate it.  :)

Today was a dose of something new on the hair front. Before my shower, I dry combed my hair with my Conair seamless comb as usual. It's been easier to comb & brush through since I've been using Pantene again.

Washed with Pantene Classic Clean shampoo & left the Restore & Renew deep fortifying treatment in for an hour. That stuff is thicker & richer than I thought!  ;D     After rinsing it out, I followed with Pantene Classic Care conditioner and then finished off with Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

My only leave-in today was Pantene Light Spray Conditioner. Didn't have time to oil, as I had to rush off to work. Once my hair was dry, I put it up temporarily in a loop ponytail until my break at 3:00...then I brushed it and twisted it into a bun. Couldn't find my burgundy velour scrunchie, so I had to wear my light blue one.  :-/

After finishing at both jobs, I went to my parents' house to see my dog for the last time.  :'(  He laid in his bed most of the time, so I sat with him and pet him. He nearly fell asleep while I was doing that. It was cute. And for once, I didn't mind getting covered in white hair (I wear all black) or licked on the chin for one of his dog kisses.

Quote:

It hurts so much when a pet is in pain.  I know I've had many and it doesn't get easier,you just are prepared more,in a way.

You're right, it never gets easier. A co-worker told me today that if it does get easier, then something's wrong.
   
When my grandmother died, I wished that I'd gotten to hug her just one last time...but she lived 2 states away.  :'(  My dog doesn't, and tonight I spared myself from wishing the same thing with him. I'm glad that I got to see him one last time, though it breaks my heart.
   Before climbing back into my car, I paused outside on my old street, in the dark, and just enjoyed the rural suburban silence. The quietness of the neighbourhood, the stars, the darkness of the sky, the brightness of the moon, the constant chirp of crickets. But mostly just the silence. It's peaceful.
   Quite the contrast from the constant clamour of the inner city. It's funny...when I was younger, all I wanted was to get the heck out of that suburban "small town" ASAP because nothing ever happened. I wanted action, a change of scenery, a new and different life. With God's ironic sense of humour, that was exactly what I got. Now I find myself once again appreciating East County for its silence and tranquil charm. *sigh* The grass is always greener, I guess...

Today was my 2nd day of ab training, and ohh man, am I sore! I knew this month was going to be hard. But somehow, it's easier than I expected.

Anyway, my net connection is restored, obviously. heh That was quick. And now I'm off to bed, as I have the early shift tomorrow - ugh!

Bye for now.

Glad you got to spend time with your dog.  I'm sure it was beneficial for both of you.

Thanx, BB...it was.  :)

La la la hooray for indecision!  ;D  Today I washed twice with Pantene Classic Clean. Just once would have done the trick...I guess I was just curious to see what would happen if I washed twice. Wanted that really clean feeling. But that didn't exactly happen, so I immediately had second thoughts about it.  :-/  My roots in back actually seemed greasier after the 2nd washing. WTF?  ???

Anywho, followed with Classic Care conditioner, capped as usual while doing other shower stuff. After rinsing it out, chased as usual with Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner. I'm wondering whether a 2nd conditioning actually does anything. It didn't the first time I tried it.  :-/
   I guess I just wanted an extra layer of softness & fragrance. But it seems that no matter what I use, my hair always ends up smelling like funky carrots anyway. So yeah, now I'm having second thoughts about the whole 2nd conditioner step.

Used Pantene Light Spray Conditioner before detangling with my RS #45. Didn't have time to oil today either. Oy...not a good habit.  :P  Today's style was a velour scrunchie bun, again. I found my burgundy scrunchie last night.

Ugh...my boyfriend has one of his friends over & he is so loud & swears constantly! Which, in turn, makes my boyfriend swear (because he's a sheep). >:(  They're doing the 13-year-old thing again...playing video games and chugging soda. I came home from work early for this?  ::)  *chuckle*

Anyway, back on the hair subject, I'm starting to have 2nd thoughts about using Pantene again as a whole, which sux because of how much $$$ I just dropped on my new Classic line stuff.  :-/
   But the reason behind it is...it seems that my "greasy roots" problem is being caused by all of the Pantene products that I use. I have no idea as to why they're suddenly affecting my hair this way...I used most everything in the Daily Moisture Renewal line for years without a problem until now. I don't get it.  ???

heh When I left the office today, my mother told me to "go do something, even if it's wrong."  ;)  She said that her father always used to tell her that. hehehe It sounds like pretty good advice at the moment. I have the whole day to do anything I want. The key is to actually do something. Hmmm... lunch might be a good place to start.

So I'm out to find adventure...peace!

OK, WTF happened to Herbal Essences?! http://www.herbalessences.com/us/  ???  Talk about reformulation!  :o  My boyfriend will not be pleased at all.  :-/

Today should be a magical day...it's a combination of so many things that I love: Saturday, the 13th and a full moon!  :D  So why haven't I accomplished a single thing on my daily agenda? I'll tell you (as if you care)...

My top priority for the day was to sleep as long as possible. Sleep in, sleep late, sleep all day, if I wanted to! After the week I've had, I need and have earned it.
   But apparently, Mr. Sleep Apnea himself had other plans...which included the usual taking up the whole bed to himself, trapping me under his heavy limbs and breathing on me.  >:(  Ugh, I hate that! He, like every other male, is a total mouth breather, and OMG, smoker's breath in the morning!!  :P  :-X  :P *faint*

So I got up.  >:(

Other priorities for today included washing and treating all with Pantene, but....one step into the kitchen changed all of those plans.
   It was like a scene from some nightmarish movie...dirty dishes piled everywhere with food still on them, trash and papers strewn haphazardly across the counter, pots and pans still sitting on the stove with stuff that had boiled up out of them and run down the sides.  :o

I immediately began washing dishes, which led to cleaning the refridgerator, which led to the microwave, then the counter, then the sink, etc. etc. After over 3 hours of cleaning, one side of the kitchen is decent.  :-/  There is much left to do, but better left for another day. I'm exhausted.

So with today's "plans" hopelessly dashed, I find myself asking, what's next? I haven't taken a shower yet and it's after 3 pm.  :P  If I decide to eventually fix that, I'm not even going to bother washing my hair. I might light condition it with my Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner, but aside from that, what's the point? Hopefully the night holds more promise than the day has.

My parents were planning to put our dog to sleep today.  :'(  I want to know if they followed through with that...I want to know my dog's status, if he has one anymore...but I don't want to call them. If they had to do that, then they'll need some time to themselves. As much as I'd like to know what's become of my friend, it would be selfish of me to barge in on their time of grief.
   I know that my father must be an absolute wreck right now. Not only did our first dog die of cancer, but the man just lost his mother to cancer only months ago. Now this.  :'(

What I need to do is just take a shower and then pray for everyone. Maybe I'll shave, too. I need to.  :P

The night brings clarity and tranquility, so maybe things will make more sense after that full moon rises.

God be with you, Bodie, wherever you are.

oh angel,bless the pup wherever he is(most likely Rainbow's Bridge,which is the best place to be!!)  Hope you're relaxing through the evening,too!

Thanx, Curlgirl.  :)

Hallelujah! Today I washed with Pantene Classic Clean shampoo. It was like putting on a lovely old dress from the closet and realizing that it still fits.  :)
   Left the Deep Fortifying Treatment in my hair for over an hour. After rinsing it out, I followed with Classic Care conditioner and then Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

Spritzed in a good amount of the Light Spray Conditioner before detangling with my RS #45. Then oiled the ends...a bit heavily, which is actually ok because I have my hair in a bun.

Finally got to shave today, as I'd needed to. My legs have been sparkly all day because Olay's In Shower Moisturizer has glitter in it. I've realized that I actually like it when my skin sparkles. Egad, I'm a glitter goth.  ;D

Got to wear a tank top today, too. I don't think I've worn one since I started (or finished) my arm training. I've been flexing in front of almost every mirror in the house. hehehe

I'm almost a week into ab training, and am beginning to notice the same natural progression as with my arms. The muscles are definitely tighter and always seem to beg for more exercise. This month, I just may indulge that more.
   Today I worked both my abs and arms, and all of the muscles seemed to like it. I may devote much of my time on future weekends to exercise. Let my boyfriend laugh and tease all he wants, but I am making some real progress.  8)

Another part of the kitchen got thoroughly cleaned and sterilized today. I was even able to scrub the coagulated oil splatters off of the backsplash behind the stove. Me evil dæmon of an ex-roommate had put them there, as he liked to deep fry absolutely everything he ate in canola oil...and that stuff splattered everywhere! It completely destroyed the underside of our kitchen hood and ruined the backsplash. I've cleaned both several times, but that crap is stuck on there like rubber cement. It took a great deal of scrubbing, cleaner and hot water to remove the splatters from the backsplash. I'm just glad that they came out!
   I'm still slowly purging our place of the dæmon's evil influence. Bloody imbecile. I wonder if he's causing his new roommate as much agony as he caused me.

But speaking of him, I finally cleaned and restored 5 long mirrors that he'd found in the alley behind our apartment. He'd brought them in, intending to hang them in "his" room, but never did, and didn't bother to take them with him when he left.
   My boyfriend & I figured that we could use them, so I cleaned all of them up today in hopes that he'll hang them when he gets home. 3 will go in the living room and 2 in the bedroom. It will be nice to have some full-length mirrors around so I can actually see how awful my outfits look before I leave the house.  ::)

A few moments ago, I called my mother to say hello and wish her a happy Mother's Day. My dog is still alive.  :)

Well, that's all for now. Gonna make up some pasta now 'cause I'm starving!

Suvived another workday - whew!  ::)  I actually made it home a little early, having passed on my 2nd job today. When I drove by the office, my boss was still in there (on the computer that I need to use), so I just went straight home...like I wanted to do anyway.  ;D

This morning, I finger combed through my hair as usual, but then used my Conair Velvet brush instead of my seamless acrylic comb. Call me crazy, but the brush actually feels more comfortable than the comb, and there is less snapping. Not really sure why, but I'll go with it.

Today's routine was a repeat of yesterday: washed once with Classic Clean shampoo, then left the Deep Fortifying Treatment in for at least an hour, maybe 2. Rinsed and chased with Classic Care conditioner and then Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

Only leave-in today was the Light Spray Conditioner, as I didn't have time (yet again) to oil the ends.  :(

I swear, I am going to make myself diabetic one of these days. It seems like all I've eaten for the past 3 days is pasta & bread...not that we have anything else at the moment.  :-/
   I've just made a plate of spaghetti for myself, as I'm not really sure what time my boyfriend will be home. He had side work to do in a beloved, small mountain town about an hour away.

Curious thing about spaghetti noodles. Pretty much everyone prefers them a different way. Some people just throw them in a pot with water and boil them until they look "done." Others prefer to leave them boiling for a looooong time so the noodles absorb so much water that they look more like linguine than spaghetti when they're "done."
   Me, I add fresh ground salt and olive oil (yes, the same olive oil that I used to use on my hair) to the water, boil them for 10 minutes and - al dente! Magnifico! Or something.  :P

Come to think of it, people are pretty diverse when comes to sauces, too. Most people probably like the meat-flavoured type. Some love meatballs, some love to mix browned hamburger into a meat sauce.
   I am not big on meat sauces. Yeah, they're alright, but I prefer anything with veggies, cheese, garlic and herbs. The less carnivorous variety.  ;D  Oh yeah, and pile on the snow cheese.

Wow, did I really take up that much space just talking about spaghetti?! I need a hobby.  :P

Anyway, that's all for now. Nothin' special. I think I'll go light some black candles and listen to Depeche Mode now.  8)

Hey Angel Spun-

I so seriously love Depeche Mode....my favorite album was Black Celebration.   My very best friend stole the cassette for me when I was 14......It was stollen from me a few years later, never owned Depeche since.....

sorry to bother.  Bye!

No bother at all, Nancy!  :D  I totally dig DP too.

My favourite album is Violator, but I bought it. I'd never steal anything.  ;)

I didn't ask him to steal it.... :-[

lol Nan.  ;)

Washed and treated again today. Pantene Classic Clean shampoo, Deep Fortifying Treatment (for an hour), Classic Care conditioner, then Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

Didn't have time for any leave-in's today, as I was late to work.  :(

Tomorrow I plan to compensate in a major way. I'm getting up early to do the full thing: shower, planned outfit & accessories, makeup, the works!! At least, if my skin cooperates.  :-/  It's been rebelling against my laziness lately.

Yesterday I completed my 1st week of ab training. My stomach is already tighter and a teeny bit flatter. Yay!  :D  I will kick the aftermath of those evil meds yet...just watch!

In other news....I got a snake!!  :D  My boyfriend brought him home from the site that he's been working at up in the mountains. He's a cute little gopher snake named Jack. Only a few years old, from what I can tell.
   He's totally non-venomous and has no teeth. Just a long, black tongue that he uses to smell things. His colouring is in desert neutrals: cream, beige, tan, black and russet...and he has lovely copper eyes. I might pick him up when he becomes more familiar with his new environment.
   The only drawback is that gopher snakes are carnivorous, as constrictors are and omg, I am not feeding live mice to anything!!!  :o  :'(  I'll make my boyfriend do it.
   Otherwise, it's cool. I've never had a snake before.  :)

Tonight we're going to Balboa Park to release some feeder fish into one of the ponds.  ;D  Well, at least we're getting out & doing something!

Anywho, that's about all I can think of at the moment. Time to scare up some fun!  ;)

Ooh, snakey!  ;D Will we get to see a picture of him some day? I was wondering, most pet supply stores here sell frozen mice and rats for snake food. :) Maybe you could see if your local store sells those too.

Oh I love snakes ;D.  Never had one though but I always wanted a corn snake.  There soo neat!  A friend of mine had a ball python and dinner time was always exciting, for me at least ::)  Hey you can get pinkys for you snake, there the little dead frozen mice and train it to eat that.  

Best of luck!  ;D

my ex-finance had a Bermese Python that was 13 feet long and I have a pic taken with her.  She was soooo heavy that after a few minutes of standing with her I had to sit down!!  That was back in 96 and sadly to say she is longer around!!!  I wish I could post the pic for all of you to see,she was amazing!!!!!!!!!

Wow. Snakes can be fun. I've never had one, but it would be an adventure. :)
Meg

Great idea, Galadriel & Lisabelle! Thanx for the tip. I will definitely look into getting some frozen "pinkies" for Jack. I'm really not sure when he last ate.  :-/
   Although, all he wants to do right now is sleep, mostly under his heat lamp (which is a cool shade of aqua blue, rather than red). Of course, that's what snakes usually do, isn't it?

*chuckle* When I first told my mother that I'd gotten a snake, she immediately replied, "You mean [your boyfriend] got a snake...not you. You wouldn't want a snake. Snakes are icky."
   LOL  ;D  She may as well have come right out and said, "No child of mine would want a snake!" So I'm contentedly ostracized, yet again, for my ohhh-so-eccentric tastes and even caused her to revert to using infantile words like "icky."  ;D  I so love being the freak of the family.  ;)

Didn't get to go all-out today, as my skin was most contrary to the idea. But I woke up too late to do it all anyway. *sigh* Better luck next time...whenever that is.
   Though I still wish it could have been today. One of the warehouse guys (of a particularly opportunistic reputation) had the nerve to ask my age this morning at work.  :o  Of course, I reminded him that he should never ask such questions of a lady, and he said that he knew...but that I appeared (to him) to be about 21.
   21?! I must say, that is the oldest age that I have ever been mistaken for. *sigh* I must be losing it.  :(

But it shouldn't even matter. No one there would have the slightest interest if they had any idea what I was really like. If I walked around in full-fledged "goth mode" all the time, many of them might be completely turned off. It does tend to have a polarizing effect on people. *shrug*

Anyway, hair was simple today, as I hadn't much time. Washed once with Classic Clean shampoo, conditioned with Classic Care, capped and did all of the other usual shower stuff. Then rinsed out the conditioner, followed with Suave Lavender & Lilac and that was it.

I am pleased to report that I not only used Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner before combing, but oiled the ends afterward.  ;D  I was sure that I'd overdone it with the oil, but it absorbed completely as my hair dried. YESSS!

Today it's mostly been twisted up in a velour scrunchie bun, but I changed it to a looped ponytail for working out when I got home.
   Speaking of which, I finished all of my work at the 2nd job yesterday and worked the early shift at the 1st this morning. So now I have nothing to do until 12:30 pm tomorrow!!  :D  Freedom is beautiful.

As of now, I am waiting for a face masque to dry while glancing every so often at Jack, who has been sleeping in the same position under his heat lamp for almost an hour. I like watching his scales move slowly as he changes positions. Almost like watching the Moray eels swim at Sea World. Such graceful creatures they are...

Oh yes...speaking of Jack, he does indeed have teeth. Tiny ones which are only sharp enough to "scratch" human skin. But due to gopher snakes' diet of rodents & other small beasts, their mouths are festering with bacteria, and a bite would mean instant infection. Bleagh.  :P  I hope it never comes to that.

Balboa Park at night is awesome!!  :D  It had been years since my last visit, and the place is even more fascinating than I'd remembered. I really must spend more time there. It's the perfect place for an art/science/history/nature freak like myself.  ::)  I'd like to go back and try to see if my fish are still alive.

Alright...I'm going to stop rambling before this entry gets any longer/more boring.  :P  Peace out.

Ugh...it's early.  :P

My bum of a boyfriend woke me up at around 6-something when he immediately started getting ready for his disc golf tournament. His alarm went off shortly after. Hey, what is it with guys being so incompetent in the morning that they can't manage to turn off a simple alarm clock?  >:(

Anyway, the morning got even better when he turned the bedroom light on...and left it on, though I wasn't even supposed to be awake for another few hours.  >:(  Men are so considerate...
   Then his coffee grinder wouldn't work, and that ruined his whole morning. He pounded and beat that machine trying to make it work...and looked like a monkey or a caveman in the process. It was comical...until he started acting like a jerk.  >:( Then he began searching every place in the house for money so he could run to the donut shop and buy a cup of coffee. Pathetic...the desperate measures that addicts take to get their chemical "fix."  ::)

He later accused me of ruining his coffee grinder and got snot on me for the umpteenth time this morning when he leaned over to kiss me. Of course, I turned away, but how disgusting!!  :P  :P  :P When I told him to blow his nose because he was grossing me out, he got up, spouted the usual bitter, "Whatever!" slammed the door and left. Men and maturity have never mixed.  :P

But all of this after I bought him a healthy dinner last night and took care of him because he wasn't feeling well. Ingrates, all of them!  >:(  Alright, I think I'm done venting.  :-X

My snake appears to have eaten last night. My boyfriend insisted that pinkies were too small, so he put a small, male, albino mouse in the terrarium. Kind of a cute little thing.  :-/  Jack didn't even seem to notice the mouse at first, and I doubted that he would or could eat it.
   But, sly, nocturnal beast that he is, Jack waited until we humans had retired for the night. This morning, the mouse was gone, almost as though he'd never been there at all. Jack was curled up under the branch in his terrarium, having made clean, discreet and swift work of everything.
   Now he's resumed his usual place on top of the branch, near the heatlamp. Food, sleep...what more do you need, eh, Jacky? Life of Riley...

So....hair.

Today's routine is the same as yesterday's. Wash once with Pantene Classic Clean shampoo, leave the Deep Fortifying Treatment in for an hour, rinse and chase with Classic Care conditioner. Then finish with Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

The only leave-in as usual is Pantene's Light Spray conditioner. Detangle with my RS #45, oil the ends and air dry. Same old story. Bless those pearly bottles, though. Pantene might not smell great like, say, Herbal Essences, but it has saved my hair from certain destruction.

I think that after my Classic bottles are empty, I will move onto the Smooth & Sleek line. Green is good.

Still tempted to colour my hair, though I know it's a bad idea. A bad idea with short-lived results. But still...the idea of having a hair colour with more "presence" is an appealing one.
   I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with light brown. Light brown is beautiful and has a presence and a character all its own...but I've never preferred it over, say, black (oooh!) or dark red. I definitely have the right colouring for the latter. *sigh*

On a better note, it is getting noticeably longer.  :D It's such a tease to be just inches away from my short-term goals.

Still going strong on the exercise front. Only 20 more days of ab training. Only? That seems like a lot.  :-/

Ah well. That's all for now. Laterz.

A little different today.

Started things off with an hour-long mayo treatment. Then washed with Pantene Classic Clean shampoo and gave another hour to the Deep Fortifying Treatment.

While all of this was going on, I invested in more personal maintenance and spent the day trimming, plucking, painting and conditioning.

After rinsing the Deep Fortifying Treatment out of my hair, I followed with Pantene Classic Care and Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioners successively. Only problem is after all of that, I don't think that all of the mayonnaise got rinsed out.  :-/
   But I might do a heavy oiling later on and just take care of all of it with a shower tomorrow morning.

Only leave-in so far has been Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner.

Oy! So much to do, so little time and even less money.  :(  I need to go grocery shopping because we're out of absolutely everything and both the boyfriend and I need clean clothes before tomorrow morning. I could easily remedy that, but it would mean having nothing left over for rent. I hate getting my last check so early in the month!  :(  Alright, enough griping.

I agreed to housesit for my aunt & uncle at the end of the month. That's always such a hassle, but it will allow me to take care of my boyfriend's HUGE, perpetual pile of laundry that's always festering against one wall of the bedroom.
   Plus, my aunt & uncle have a wicked cool shower with dual heads....the kind that you can hold onto. Much more convenient than the stationary type. They also have a fireplace, internet access and a new puppy and kitten. Should be fun.  ;)

I was supposed to go to my cousins' ice skating show tonight, but I have way too much to do and absolutely nothing to wear (literally, it's all dirty). I'd like to call ahead and tell them that I'm unable to make it, but they're going to be disappointed and probably lay on one of their oh-so-subtle guilt trips.  :-/
   Maybe I'll just tell them I forgot.  :-[

Anyway, exercise is still going. But I'm kind of at that discouraged point right now, where it looks hopeless. Pointless. Futile. *sigh* I know that working out every single day for over a month couldn't possibly be in vain, but that's what it's beginning to feel like.

Alright, off to the grocery store.  :-/

Boy does it suck to be a member of my family right now.

Our beloved yellow lab, Bodie, was put to sleep at 6:00 this evening.  :'(

To make matters worse, tomorrow marks 2 months since my grandmother's passing.

When I arrived at work this morning, my mother advised me to come over after my shift if I wanted to say goodbye again. But I never got the chance.
   I was almost to my parents' house at around 5:35 when my father called on my cell to tell me that he had loaded the dog into the truck and was taking him to the vet. This was the 3rd time in my life that I have ever known my father to cry. But the man is a wreck. As if losing his mother to cancer not 2 months ago wasn't bad enough...
   We also lost our first dog to cancer. Her name was Dixie...half rottweiler, half chocolate lab...all black. She had been a friend of Bodie's when they were young...and she only lived 6 years.  :'(

I know that they are together again, and in a better place. I've asked Jesus to look after both of them until my family and I (God willing) can be with them again.

After shopping for about an hour, I figured that my parents would have returned from the vet, so I finally headed out to their place.
   They were both in tears. I joined them on the couch to talk and watch TV...and mourn. Once again, I knew that I had to be strong. If I broke down, it would only intensify their grief, so I held back the tears. Just like when my grandmother passed. And my first dog.
   My father was detatched. Toward the end of my visit, he grabbed a pillow from the couch and laid down by where I was sitting to sleep. He said that he was too depressed to stay awake.  :'(  God bless him.

They invited me to have some spaghetti that my mother had recently made, but just as I was delving into the dutch oven, my boyfriend called and suggested dinner at Souplantation. So my visit was cut shorter than I would have wanted, but it was ok.

Dinner was alright, though I didn't feel much like eating. And afterwards, I swung by the local Claim Jumper to see if my sister was there. But she had already left...so I went home.

So...hair. *sigh*

I don't think that I will ever use mayonnaise on it again. Not only did it leave me with greasy roots and hair that smelled like mayonnaise,  :P  but it didn't seem to moisturize my hair at all! What a waste.  :P

This morning, I clarified with Pantene Purity shampoo and a distilled white vinegar rinse. Followed with Pantene Classic Care conditioner and Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

No leave-in's. Just let it air dry without combing, and put it up with a velour scrunchie.

In other news, summer is steadily approaching. *groan*  :-/  So during my shopping trip today, I bought some sunblock and a water-resistant mascara. I have everything else I need to make it through...I think.

Exercise is...going.  :P  I still need to do another morning and evening workout tonight. Results are slow.
   While at my parents' house, I jumped on the scale in my sister's bathroom. 125.5 with all of my clothes & big ol' boots on.  ;D  Doing better than I was...but still nowhere near where I need/want to be.

Alright, this entry is long enough. I've covered it all and am too depressed myself to keep typing anyway. So peace out for now.

Be at peace, Bodie. We love you.

Im so sorry about Bodie and your Grandmother!  I hope things will be easier for your family.  

  On a lighter note, Wow that is my dream goal weight...... one day. ::) I used to be like that in HS. now it is no where even close to that number. :P

Hang in there!  I'm so sorry about Bode.  I'm sure he has crossed the Rainbow Bridge and is playing with Dixie and all the other dogs that have crossed before him.

Angel, you have my most sincere sympathies.  4 years ago we had to have Sparky, our sheltie, put to sleep.  I won't go into details because it still hurts--I'm tearing up as I'm typing!  Just want you to know I'm right there with you, emotionally.  *hugs*   :-/

Angel

You've made me cry. :'(

I know dogs are in heaven because the Bible says that we will find all the desires of our hearts there.  You'll see him again.  (My mommy and daddy will help take care of him, ok?)  Crying again....God, I'm such a big baby.

Hope all is better soon.  Thinking about ya. :)

Curlygirl22: Thank you kindly. I hope things get better too...but they say that things like this always happen in 3's.  :-/
   Don't feel bad about the weight thing...you're probably much taller than I am. Most everyone else is.  :-[
BB: Rainbow Bridge sounds like a beautiful place to be. If there are horses and lots of food on the other side, I know he'll be happy.  ;)

Trisha: Thank you kndly for your sympathy. I'm so sorry about Sparky!  :(  Perhaps he & Bodie have met in the great beyond.
   Losing a member of your family is the worst, and dogs definitely fit into that category!

Nancy:

Quote:

I know dogs are in heaven because the Bible says that we will find all the desires of our hearts there.

That's one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard. I haven't read all of the Bible, but it can be so comforting in times of trouble!
   Terribly sorry about your parents - that has to be the absolute worst! *wipes away your tears* And you're not a baby. I appreciate your thoughts.  :)

You guys are making my scalp tingle.  ;D  That happens when I feel sincerely cared for. It probably sounds weird, but it's been that way all my life...and it doesn't happen very often.

"The future's in the air
can feel it everywhere
blowing with the wind of change..."
   (The Scorpions)

Today marks 2 weeks of ab training...and 2 months since my grandmother's death.

It was a sunny day. I got a chance to try out y new summer "makeup" (which consists mostly of very high SPF sunblock  ;)). I think I have found the sunblocks which leave behind the least amount of greasy film.
   Even still, being coated in sunblock always makes my hair feel thin and lifeless and gross, so during the warmer months, I just put it up & forget about it.
    Been looking for Chapstick Ultra (SPF 30) but no one seems to carry it anymore.  ??? Ah well. Maybe I'll just go with a blackberry shade of Cover Girl's Triple Lipstick.

The indiscreet sales rep who always flirted with me was fired today. Er, not for openly flirting with me...for something else. Either way, my boyfriend should be happy.
   I don't like to see a co-worker lose their job, but it's a relief to know that he won't pester me ever again. I took somewhat malevolent delight in removing his name from the birthday and anniversary lists. *smirk*

Today, I washed once with Pantene's Classic Clean shampoo, conditioned with Classic Care conditioner, capped while doing all the other shower stuff, then rinsed. Finished, as usual, with the usual Suave Lavender Lilac chaser...which is thankfully almost gone.

The only leave-in was Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner. No oil.  :-[

That overwhelmed/confused feeling is upon me once again where hair products are concerned. It seems I'm never satisfied. Herbal Essences is not even a concern anymore, as they have utterly desecrated everything they once stood for.
   Should I stick with Pantene? Should I try TRESemmé's Anti-Breakage line? What about Pantene Restoratives? Or Smooth & Sleek? What about Suave Professionals?  ???  :P

Just calm down, Angel. Exercise, laundry, bed. Plan? Plan! OK...gone!

((((Angel Spun))))  I'm so sorry.   :-[  It's never easy to lose a pet.  I was a mess after Agatha P. died; I even missed a day of work.  

I figure in Heaven I'll have to have 20 laps and 40 hands to deal with all of my pets who're waiting for me.   8)

My sympathies to you and your family.  

Angel Spun, I'm so sorry about Bodie. I hope you and your parents are feeling better (especially your dad).

(((hugs)))

I'm so sorry, Angel. It is hard to lose a pet that you love. (((((hug)))))
Meg

((((((((((((((13, juri & wishing)))))))))))))))  Thank you for the kind words. We're all hanging in there as best we can. My parents are noticing how big & empty their house is without the dog & his things.  :'(  My father is still taking it the hardest.
   They're having Bodie cremated, and his ashes will most likely be spread at the ranch where we keep our 3 horses. That was his favourite place to go and where he was happiest.

Hair: Yesterday was just another wash & condition day. Nothing out of the ordinary, although I did finally oil the ends.
   Today, no oiling, but I washed & treated & all that jazz. Left the Deep Fortifying Treatment in for an hour. Conditioned the crap out of my hair as per usual.
   After spraying with Pantene's Light Spray Conditioner, I combed my wet hair from the bottom only up to about ear level. Didn't bother with anything above that - just let it all air dry.
   When it did, I detangled with my Conair seamless comb and then used my Velvet purse brush to help smooth my hair into the usual velvet scrunchie bun. It's still that way now.

Work: Hours are getting scarce and the check I'm expecting from my 2nd job is now 5 days late!  >:(

Exercise: Still going, but I forget to do my nightly exercises sometimes and have to make up for them the next day. Disappointing.

Life:  :P  Let's not go there.

Anyway, that's all for now. Later.

I am so sorry to hear about your "pup"!  I haven't had a chance to read and catch up on journals so I'm sorry I'm late,but my sympathies are with you,Angel.

Aww, thanx, Curlgirl! (((((((((hugz))))))))))) I do appreciate it.  :)

The "empty nest syndrome" is beginning to set in for both my father and grandfather. Both of their homes seem too big and quiet and empty without their loved ones.  :(
   My grandfather has agreed to come down from WA to help my parents completely remodel their kitchen. That should help everyone in many ways.

On Friday afternoon, while I was at work, my father called and asked if I wanted to go to Disneyland this weekend.  ;D  Of course, I accepted, albeit with a slightly guilty conscience for all of the obligations that I would be postponing even further.  ::)  But whatever...a girl's got to live.

I had just enough time to go straight home from my 1st job, throw a few things into a backpack and then rush to my parents' place. Left my car at their place (where it was safe, thank goodness - no parking tickets!  :P) and rode up with them in their car. First stop was the hotel where we'd be staying that night. As my father was checking in, my boyfriend called & asked where I was.  :-[  ;)  My mother encouraged me to ask him to come up and meet us, so I did...and he agreed!

After that, my parents and I went on a few rides in the park before it closed. My favourite ride has some new changes that I am totally not thrilled about.  >:(  :P
   My boyfriend showed up just as the park was closing. We shopped for a bit afterwards and went to the bar in the Grand Californian hotel, but all of us were too tired to do anything, so we just ended up going back to our hotel and crashing.
   
The morning was interesting with all 4 of us trying to get ready simultaneously...but we made it work. We went on a few more rides in both Disneyland and Disney's California Adventure before finally heading home around noon. I gave my backpack to my boyfriend for him to take home and rode back with my parents, as my car was still in their driveway.

Traffic turned the usual 1 ½ hour trip into 4 hours of road rage & agony.  :P  But we finally reached their place safe & sound and I left right after to go shopping and grab something to eat before heading home. I bought 4 new bodywashes in beautiful fruity fragrances and a coconut lime body spray (haven't used it yet).
   After that, I grabbed lunch from Jamba Juice, then was off to JC Penney to pick up my latest order.  ;)  2 pairs of pants & a set of 3 lovely cannisters. I'm more impressed with the latter.

By this time, I was feeling quite exhausted - I hadn't slept well (or at all) last night and after a day of running around in the freaking SoCal SUN, every ounce of my energy had been sapped. Finally after arriving home, I just crashed.

So what was my hair doing in all of this time? Well, nothing. That's the bad part.  :P  Yesterday, I realized that even Pantene's Classic line had been loading my roots up with gunk - most specifically in just one place in the back. But that was it. I'd had it.  >:(  I left my hair up in a bun for the night while running around at Disneyland.
   This morning, I hadn't time for a shower at the hotel, so I just jumped in and rinsed my hair with cold water. Left it in a looped ponytail until I got home this afternoon. It was flat, oily and disgusting. I hate that feeling...I can never go too long without a shower.  :P
 
When I finally took one, I did a clarifying wash with Pantene Purity shampoo and a white vinegar rinse. Followed with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense conditioner, and finished with Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner.

No leave-in's tonight (that would have made it take even longer to dry), but my hair and the rest of me are feeling much cleaner & refreshed. Though I realized that I did get a little sunburned today.  >:(  The sun has never been a friend of mine.  :P

Anyway, so that accounts for the first half of my weekend. What do the next 2 days have in store? Guess we'll just have to see.  ;)

It's nice that you took some time to have fun and spend time with loved ones!  Good for you.
:)

Well well...another day has found me with clean hair, clean dishes and a clean kitchen!  ;D  Despite my boyfriend's best efforts to completely trash all 3, I am not letting it happen!

Today I washed once with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo, conditioned with the respective conditioner, capped, finished the rest of my shower, rinsed, then chased with Suave Lavender & Lilac conditioner. Very simple.

The usual Pantene Light Spray Conditioner leave-in, and today I actually oiled.  ;D

My snake shed, and today I actually watched him eat a mouse!  :o  I am so morbid.  :-[  But my boyfriend said that it was pretty necessary to watch from time to time to see how long it takes for a snake to devour its prey and how far they have to stretch their jaws...just to be sure that what they're eating isn't too much for them, I guess. Even so, part of me wishes I hadn't seen that.  :P  My stomach still feels strange even hours later.  :P  Man, reality sux.  :P  :P

Today I also rather impassively realized that I have the ability to end any type of relationship suddenly and effortlessly if I feel the need. Must be another side effect of divorce.
   Of course, I'm not referring to my boyfriend, but rather someone else whom I had cared for and confided in for quite sometime only to have them end up verbally trashing goths for no reason at all, ultimately proving themselves to be...well, let's not go there.  :-X  
   *shrug* I've given them far more credit than they deserve by writing this much about them anyway. Good riddance.

Well, that's about it for today, aside from the usual slings and arrows. I shall go now and try to make the most of the night.

Hey Angel Spun-

Just wanted to let you know that I'm so loving your avatar picture thingy.   Very cool.

hehe thanx, Nan.  ;D

Alright, I think I have time for an entry.

Today I treated, using the last of both my Pantene Deep Fortifying Treatment and Intensive Restoration Treatment. Washed first with Pantene Restoratives shampoo.
   I'm really not sure how long I left the treatment in for, but I chased it with the Restoratives conditioner afterwards.

Used Pantene Light Spray Conditioner before detangling with my RS #45 as usual, but my hair dried before I remembered to oil it! Drat! I have to remember that when using a gel shampoo, my hair dries in like 0.2 seconds!  :-/

So hmmm...what else?
   My boyfriend is still a jerk. I only had until 5:00 this evening to be here and he chose to spend the day playing disc golf and at the beach with his friends.  >:(  But whatever. If I'm not "entertaining" or "interesting" enough for him then....whatever.

So what's going on at 5:00 that I have to leave for? Dinner with my 3 young cousins, of course.  ;)  I haven't seen them in so long.... I'll be housesitting for them for 3 days this week, so they need to introduce me to their new pets and show me how to take care of them. They have a new puppy & kitten, so it should be fun.  ;D

I talked to the guy that I mentioned yesterday and realized that his comments weren't directed at all goths, just the poseurs in his area. But still...he acted like a jerk all day yesterday and I really think it would be for the best if I just severed the ties with him. Or at least if we didn't talk as often. It's just a gut feeling I've had for awhile.

Exercise is going well. I'm finally starting to see some definition in my abs...thank goodness....it's been almost 3 weeks!!
   Unfortunately, I'd need way more than the next 11 days to cut away all of the excess flab that's been hanging around that area, but other areas need worked, too. I can always come back to this one.
   I wanted to go to the beach with my boyfriend this afternoon to score some cardio, but didn't have time & he didn't feel like waiting for me to get ready. *sigh*
   Ah well. I have all summer to boogie board my brains out...and I plan to, no matter what the cost. I hope my hair won't dry out hopelessly...I'll try to remember to oil it heavily before pulling it through the waves every day. I can't stand the idea of wearing a swim cap...at least for now.

But on the subject of hair, why does everything I use have to suck in some way? I swear... Pantene's Daily Moisture Renewal was my main squeeze for years, and now all of a sudden, it leaves my roots greasier than motor oil.  :P  And not just DMR...I've recently noticed that ALL of the basic Pantene lines do this.
   Herbal Essences rocked my sox, but they've changed their fomulas yet again and are now targeting the teenage pop culture mass market more than ever. It's no longer about the sensuous experience anymore...now it's all about style and colour and trend. Just like everybody else.  :P
   Pantene Restoratives seems to be doing well for my roots, but the conditioner thins out drastically when applied  ???  and leaves a chemical burn akin to the ones that Herbal Essences used to cause.

Unfortunately, I don't have the option of just never washing my hair again (which kinda sux, I mean think of the $$$ we could all save!), so I'm really at a loss as to what to do next.
   For now, I think I'll just use the crappy stuff I have, buying some time while I think things over. Oy...why can't something just work?!

Whew! Just finished my nightly exercises. Today makes 3 weeks that I've been training my abs. Only 10 days of this left.  :(  I'd love to extend this another month - my stomach could really benefit. But then, I've already lost almost an inch from my waistline.  ;D
   Just firming up and slimming down a little at a time. I can't imagine how much better I'll feel when I'm finished with everything. Then next year, I can really begin working the zones and building upon the fledgling muscles that I'm creating now. That will be fun. I miss my 8-pack.  ;)
   Tomorrow morning will be the real test, though...I'll actually face...the scale!  :o

Tonight is my first night housesitting. The animals are all behaving well enough...except for the kitten. Ugh! She is a holy terror!
   I've brought (and started) only my own laundry this time. If my beloved wants his done, he'll have to do it himself. I'm not his bloody maid!
   Didn't get to see much of him today, either. I left the apartment early, thinking that I had the early shift at work...only to arrive at my 1st job and discover that my mother was already there. So I went shopping in East County (more on that later  ;)). Anyway, my boyfriend called as I was wrapping up the evening shift, and arranged to meet me at Souplantation for dinner.
   When I arrived there, his truck wouldn't start and he told me that he'd gotten a ticket for not wearing his seatbelt and almost got one for speeding.  >:(  That's such a turn-off. Gawd.

Anywho, after dinner I went straight to my aunt & uncle's place and proceeded to unpack the things I'd bought earlier in the day.  ;)
   You see, while I was in East County, I ran back & forth to different stores picking up new hair stuff! I read ingredient lists, compared prices, the whole 9. And I ended up getting Suave Daily Moisture S & C, TRESemmé leave-in spray conditioner, Suave 2 Minute Recovery Deep Conditioner and Pantene Intensive Restoration Treatment. I also got a new Chopin CD and these yummy chocolate peppermint sticks...with peppermint in the middle, chocolate on the outside (like a York peppermint pattie) and peppermint sprinkles (like crushed up candy canes) on top of the chocolate. They're pretty good...made by Choxie. I stuck the last of them in my freezer at home.  ;D

So tomorrow will be a hair day. I rinsed out my little oil bottle and mixed up a new oil treatment for the ends of my hair. Tomorrow I'll have to remember to oil early because my hair always dries so much faster when I don't use Pantene. I really hope that this will be the beginning of a great new discovery. A hair epiphany of sorts.  ;D

Alright, time to go wash my hands and check on laundry. Until tomorrow, this weary spirit rests.

Hey Angel,

I feel your pain with not knowing what to use on your hair.  Just seems like no matter what I'm using lately I'm just not getting the results I want.  :-/  I'm still playing all withing the Pantene line, but the ones that used to be my fav's just aren't doing it for me lately, maybe it's just my hair!

Good for you on keeping up with your exersizes, that takes a lot of discipline, makes me really miss going to the gym!  I actually had a six pack going this time last year, the winter ate that right up!  :P

I hope you and your family are getting along ok without your furry buddy, we've been through it too, I know it's hearbreaking and far from easy.  (Hug)  I'm so attached to my pup, it's rediculous!  I think she fills the void in my life where I feel kids should be, so I'm probably way too attached to her and she's by far a very spoiled dog, I'll be destroyed when her time comes.

Take care, my prayers are with you!

maggie

Frick a frack!!!  >:(  >:(  :P

Why is it that every time I think I'm onto something, it always ends up going terribly wrong? Or at the very least not working?
   So much for my "hair epiphany."  :-/  >:(  The new stuff just isn't doing it for my hair, so I think I'm going to look into getting my hard-earned $$$ back from Suave.

It seems like anything that isn't loaded with cones and conditioners will just leave my hair a tangled mess. Ugh! I hate having fine hair sometimes! The way it "gums up" and catches on itself and floats in the air for a moment if I turn my head quickly for its complete lack of weight or substance....it really is like spider webs! No wonder it friggin' breaks off all the time. Just sneezing could do it, I think!  >:(


Quote:

I feel your pain with not knowing what to use on your hair.  Just seems like no matter what I'm using lately I'm just not getting the results I want.   :-/  I'm still playing all withing the Pantene line, but the ones that used to be my fav's just aren't doing it for me lately, maybe it's just my hair!

Oh crap. That's not very encouraging, considering that I just bought 2 more mondo bottles of Daily Moisture Renewal.  :-/  I figure...either it's going to work or it's not. I'll give it one more try. If it turns out that Pantene has really screwed over all of their loyal patrons by changing their formulas yet again, then I'm boycotting them forever. It's just not worth shelling out that much green for something that doesn't work.

If this fails, then...wow, I don't even know what I'll do. I may be forced to try the new brightly-coloured, wavy-bottled, happy like totally omigod NEW Herbal Essences.  :o AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!  :P  :P Or not.

Actually, if my expensive DMR squeeze fails me, I'll probably just stick with Suave. It's not great, but at least it's cheap.

Tonight, I'll put the experiment to work. I've brought my silver basket of Pantene goodies with me, and I'm going to do a sort of cure-all.
   I'll start with Pantene Purity shampoo and a vinegar rinse to clarify. My second wash will be with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo, then leave the Intensive Restoration Treatment in for an hour. After that, rinse and chase with DMR conditioner.

Leave-in's will be Pantene Light Spray conditioner and (maybe) Daily Renewal Treatment. Then oil. I'll probably be up late enough for it to dry so I can see the results.

If my roots are gunked up with grease, then, well.....let's not think about that for now. Dang. I want my Chopin CD!  :-/

It's my last night housesitting, thank goodness. I haven't had nearly as much time as I would have needed to look after the plants and animals. I just try to keep all of them alive as best as I can, despite having to rush off to work. Tonight, I may take the puppy for a walk while my hair dries. It will give me something to do.
   There's nothing to eat here. Nothing healthy at least. And I miss my boyfriend.  :(  I finally broke down and did a few loads of his laundry, though I'm worried about driving them back home becuase my car has no oil and if I blow up that $10K engine, I'm screwed.  :-/  Man, why can't life ever be just a little bit easier??

My father decided not to collect Bodie's ashes.  ???  >:(  :'(  I have no idea why and I am totally not liking that! He should have been laid to rest at the ranch where he was happiest. I don't think my sister would agree with our father's decision, either. Not cool.  :(  But whatever. I know that Bodie is free and happy and with Dixie again.

Alright, I'm going to see if I can hop in & out of the shower before my boyfriend calls me back.

Thank you for the prayers, Maggie. I need them right now.  :-/

(((((((Angel))))))))  Big hugs to you, hang in there girl. :-*

Your proposed hair routine includes a lot of conditioning products.  If you find your head/hair being greasy, try just leaving one or two of the treatments out and see if that helps.  Too much of a good thing can sometimes be bad.  :-/

Hope you find a routine that works for you.

Egad!!  :o

Grease! Tangles! Breakage! I just can't win! And WTF is up with my ticker?!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*shoots everything*

http://www.edgillett.com/images/MachineGunKitty.gif

Last night I washed and clarified as planned with my Pantene stuff, but only got as far as the Intensive Restoration Treatment before tiredness took over. I left it in for an hour, rinsed, then went to bed with wet hair, tired as heck and not really caring about anything anymore.

Just as I'd feared, when I woke up this morning, my roots were grease city.
 
BB: It wouldn't be the conditioners because those never touch the roots of my hair. Pantene shampoos cause this well enough on their own. But the leave-in's make it worse.
   I now understand why my hair was so disgusting at my grandmother's funeral. It's like I owe it to her to stop using Pantene...or something.

Lisabelle: ((((((((((((((((hugzzz)))))))))))))) Thanx, girl.  :)

Oy. It's my last day housesitting. Thank goodness. I can't take much more of this, and neither can my skin. It's been drying out terribly for days and the only lotions in the house are loaded with irritating oils & perfumes.

One thing, though...I am definitely going to ask my boyfriend (yet again) about getting a handheld showerhead like the ones they have here. They rock!

*sigh* I miss him.  :(  This week has been crappy for both of us. I'd really love to do something this weekend, just the 2 of us. Maybe get away somewhere, maybe just stay home & enjoy each other's company for once.  :-/  Yeah right! He'll spend the weekend downing caffeine & cigarettes, playing disc golf and working on his truck. I'll be alone to do whatever as usual. There won't be any time for "us." There never is. What am I thinking?  ::)  Silly, sorry little dreamer.

Anyway, this morning I woke up early, did my morning exercises and jumped in the shower. Washed with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo and followed with the 2 Minute Recovery Deep Conditioner. It's almost time to rinse that out.

One more week of ab training. Upper abs are tighter & more defined. Everything below the waistline is crap. The waistline itself is crap. *sigh* I wish I had never taken Ortho Tri-Cyclen.  :'(

After a few loads of laundry, some packing up and some housekeeping, I'll be done here....and not a moment too soon! The animals are driving me crazy!! Especially the psycho kitten and the puppy. The lack of discipline that this family exhibits is deplorable. But I don't think they view pets as important enough to pay that much attention to. Pets aren't treated as family members, they're treated like...animals. Little creatures to fawn over when the mood strikes and otherwise ignored over the more "important" things in life. When one dies, they just get a new one like it's nothing. I'm sorry, but that entire mentality disgusts me.
   
Alright, time to rinse. My next entry will be made safely from the familiar surroundings of "home."

LMAO@ the psycho shooting cat!  ;D

Angel,that kitty is just way too hilarious!!!  I totally relate to your and Maggie's hair dilema.  I'm not so happy with either Pantene,Biolage,Dove,Quidad or anything else that's on my shower tub ledge. >:( :( ::) :P  I think maybe this may be a call back to nature,so to speak.  Maybe soemthing all natural?  I may give it a try or maybe pick up some Nexxus Therapy and Humectress.....it's been a couple of years since I used those and maybe my hair would be shocked and curl the "right" way or I may be in a single braid or bun permanantly!!  Can't be so bad if I'm going to use my collection of LL sticks!!! :P ;D  Hang in there girl!!

That crazy cat is a hoot.  My stomach hurts from laughing!!  Thanks for that  ;D

I'm sorry you're struggling with your products.  Have you ever tried baby shampoo?  My hair isn't anything like yours, wish I could be some help.

Doesn't it suck to be at someone's elses house with out the right stuff??  I always get teased about all the lotions and potions I drag along-eventhough they're a necessity!  I hope you skin feels better soon.

Hang in there, puddytat.

Today marks 4 weeks of ab training. I have only 3 days left. Those 50 crunches a day are easy now, and I swear the upper half of my torso is smaller. It appears that way every time I see my reflection somewhere. Perhaps this zone training idea was a good one for me  after all.  :D  For now, I won't worry about numbers. Just about how I look & feel.

Actually got a lot of work done at my 2nd job today...and still made it home early! I also mended fences with my "goth-bashing" friend.  ;D

My boyfriend has said that he will spend more time with me. He seems determined, at least in word. But circumstances haven't, of late, played much in our favour. Though they haven't been terribly hindering.
   Last night, work kept him out until 9:00, when I was supposed to be going to bed, for my early shift the next morning. But he came home and insisted that I get ready to go out. Even though I was exhausted, I agreed, and we ended up going to dinner.
   Tonight, he helped yet another friend move and locked his keys in his truck.  ::)

After a long and confusing struggle, I seem to have found a solution to my hair problem, too!  ;D
   For the past few days, I've been trying something, having it go terribly awry, then having to clarify the next day, then trying something else the next day with the same repetitive results. So yesterday I finally just clarified with my left over Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo & Clean Rinsing conditioner. No leave-in's.
   This morning, I washed with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo and conditioned in kind. Followed with TRESemmé Detangle leave-in conditioner, detangled with my RS #45 and just let my hair air dry...even though it was cold, overcast & drizzly today.
   But ohh man! My hair felt so soft & light! It was good. A little oil and it might have been perfect...but the ends dried before I could oil them!

I definitely liked the old Herbal Essences better, but I absolutely refuse to buy the new version. Pish posh, there's nothing herbal about them anymore!  >:(
   So Suave it is...at least for now. I'm just relieved to finally find something that works.

The back of my neck is badly dried out from so many harsh chemicals and clarifying washes.  :P

And the truly bad news? I got sick over the weekend.  :(   Changes in the weather have not been kind to my sinuses.
   I went to work yesterday with almost no voice at all, and what little I had came out sounding like a cross between Kirstie Alley and Steven Tyler. It was husky, faded and about an octave deeper than usual...like I'd spent the last 20 years of my life chain smoking.  :P
   Although a customer who called my work actually said that it sounded sexy.  :-[  She was this funny Asian lady. "Oooh wow, you have sexy voice! Is very husky and smoky and sexy!" LOL Thank goodness we were only talking on the phone because I'm sure I turned beet red.  :P

Anyway, dinner was interesting last night, having no voice and my boyfriend choosing a very noisy restaurant. The waitress could barely make out what I was saying, and I had to write down everything I wanted to say to my boyfriend in the pocket journal that I carry with me, and slide it across the table to him.  :-/

Today I'm a little better. My voice has come back a bit more. I sound more like a hoarse lady once again, rather than a chain smoking guy. It will be awhile before I'll be able to sing, though, for all of the build-up that's still in my throat.

That's where I'm at right now. No longer on a shooting spree.  ;D  For now.

wrote on Jun 7^th, 2006 at 2:46am:

Although a customer who called my work actually said that it sounded sexy.  :-[  She was this funny Asian lady. "Oooh wow, you have sexy voice! Is very husky and smoky and sexy!" LOL Thank goodness we were only talking on the phone because I'm sure I turned beet red.  :P

ROTFL! Oh man, that is hilarious!! But seriously, I hope you feel better soon, Angel Spun!

I'm glad that, for the time being, your life isn't as drama filled and you've finally found a successful routine for your hair! ;D

Hope you are feeling better quickly and your voice returns.  However, having a deep sexy sounding voice might not be ALL bad! ;D

Feel better,Angel!  I'll make ya laugh....when I was very little I had a deep deep voice and one of my uncle's always called me the nickname Foghorn!  Hearing a deep voice from a little kid makes you wonder where the heck did that voice come from?????? :P  Alas, mine  was not permanent and neither will yours be!

Alright...a quick little entry, then I'm off to bed.

Hair: After examining my hair in the mirror at work for a bit, I noticed that Suave might still be up to its familiar old tricks. My hair seems dry and it might be getting that "gummy" feel that cheap shampoos leave it with.
   I also realized just how badly I need a trim. Wasn't planning to get one until next month. I hope my hair can hold out for another 23 days.  :-/

Yesterday (?) I sent away for a sample of the new Herbal Essences. *sigh* I'm not expecting anything great...just keeping the door open as a last ditch effort.

Today I washed with Suave Professionals Daily Moisture shampoo and followed with the 2 Minute Recovery Deep Conditioner, which I left in for an hour. It was easy to rinse out. Then chased with Suave Professionals Daily Moisture conditioner.
   The texture of Suave Professionals conditioners is creamier than Pantene or Herbal Essences, and they don't contain cones. Maybe that's part of the problem.

Detangled with TRESemmé leave-in conditioner and my RS #45 as usual...then actually oiled today.  :)  It's amazing how quickly my oil solution is absorbed. Maybe Suave really is drying out my hair...worse than I thought.

Still have the horrid dry, rashy skin on the back of my neck. It eats up even the richest Curél lotion in no time. *sigh* Why me?

Work: Nearly fell asleep at my desk several times today. I know better than to stay up so late when I'm sick & my weary old corpse is desperately wanting to repair itself.
   I didn't even go to my 2nd job today, being so tired and having tons of things to do...none of which I actually did.  >:(  Grrrrrrr.

Tomorrow is another big work day. What fun.  :P

Health: 2 days left of ab training, and I just finished my night exercises. There are definite, solid muscles in there now, just like with my arms. Slowly but surely, I'm rebuilding myself.

Still sick, but getting better. My voice is still bad...but getting better. Still can't sing, but desperately want to. It's instinctive to me, almost like a reflex or something. And not having the voice there is....ugh. haha Only a singer knows what it's like.  ::)

Thank you Juri, BB & Curlgirl for your well wishes. Your encouragement helps chase this little bug of mine away.

lol @ Foghorn. Poor Curlgirl. My voice is naturally just a touch deeper than most women I know...even when I'm not deathly ill. But I'm also notoriously softspoken.
   Right now, though, I still sound like a guy who's spent the last 30 years of his life strung out on hard drugs.  :P  Even my boyfriend has said it's anything but sexy. Ah well.

OK, enough rambling. Time for bed. Pleasant dreams, all.

Doing much better today. I got my voice back, and can even sing again!  :D  Though there's still a lot of throat junk in the way, so I have this constant little cough. But that's pretty normal for me, unfortunately.  :-/

Yesterday was just a basic wash & condition routine, as I had the early shift at work.

Today, I actually had some time, so I mixed up my very first batch of Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment. Had to let it sit in the fridge while I was in the shower because I heated it up a little too much. Whoops.  ::)
   Washed with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo, finished shower, then squeezed all of the excess water from my hair with a towel.
   Retrieved the thickened Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment from the fridge & applied it in the tub so it wouldn't get everywhere. While I was doing that, my boyfriend marched right into the bathroom & proceeded to *ahem* use it while I was still in there.  :o  >:(  Man!!

Let the treatment sit in my hair for an hour. It got really thin & ran down my neck a lot. The back of my neck stung like crazy because it's still raw & peeling from the rash.

When I finally rinsed it out, I was pleasantly surprised to find that my hair wasn't the least bit sticky from the honey. Just quite soft. It all rinsed out very well.
   Followed that with Suave Daily Moisture conditioner. I still want a bloody handheld showerhead!  >:(

Leave-in's were TRESemmé Detangle & a new oil solution that I just mixed up today. It consisted of baby oil, aloe vera gel and water. As a result, my hair has been an oily mess all day.  :P
   Note to self: Either don't use aloe gel next time or use wayyyy less oil!

As for Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment, overall good results so far as I can tell. I might have to use it a few more times to know for sure. If nothing else, though, it's a good way to use up my Suave Deep Conditioner.  ;D

I may have figured out a way to make Pantene work for me again, though I'm not going to test this theory until all of the other products lingering under my bathroom sink & in the shower have been used up. It will take a few months to burn through all of it, and by that time, who knows? Maybe Pantene will have fixed their greasy shampoo problem. *crosses fingers*

In other news, I'm finally done ab training. Woohoo!!  ;D  The results are about the same as with my arms: tighter, more definition and definitely more muscle mass, but still under a faint puffy layer of flab. That part will be the last to burn off, but when it does, I should have some wicked tone.  ;)
   Tomorrow I begin working on the next zone: the gluteus muscles.  :-X  Can I say that?  :-[

Lately, I've been eating as if I have a tapeworm or something. I just can't seem to get enough food! And when I do, it's such a short time before my body burns it off. Yesterday, I ran to Subway between my 1st and 2nd jobs and got a 12" turkey sub on Italian herb & cheese bread with all kinds of stuff on it, Baked Lays chips & a raspberry iced tea. All of it disappeared fast...as in less than an hour.
   The past few mornings, I've woken up with a gnawing, empty stomach ache. The kind that tell me that my stomach is digesting itself because there's nothing in it, and that it's only a matter of time before I start shaking, sweating and possibly passing out.  :-/  This isn't "weird," I'm just a touch on the hypoglycemic side.
   I think my metabolism may be speeding back up (finally!!). It was insanely fast before I started taking Ortho Tri-Cyclen. I could eat truckloads and not gain a pound. Maybe one day, it will be there again.

Emotionally, well, I'm a mess right now. So what else is new?  ::)  Stoic without, turbulent within. As usual.

Anyway, that's all for now. Peace.

Glad your voice came back, Angel Spun! I guess now you can say goodbye to that chain smoking, drug using old geezer that was trapped inside you. ;D

Hi Angelspun, glad you got your voice back. BTW, i used to use the Ortho- Tri patch and it really messed up my body. Also my metabolism. Goodluck to you. The side effects are bad and i will never use it again.

Hey angel spun.Is it possible that maybe you have a thyroid disorder.I'm just curious having one myself.

Birth control tends to bring it out in the open.It seems to set the symptoms into motion.Feeling tired,slowed metabolism.Do you have any other symptoms like cold or heat intolerance,heart palpitations,excessive hair shedding?

It might just be the birth control.But it couldnt hurt to ask your dr.Alot of people have it and dont even know,or are misdiagnosed.Its really easy to test for.

Quote:

Glad your voice came back, Angel Spun! I guess now you can say goodbye to that chain smoking, drug using old geezer that was trapped inside you.  ;D

Yup, I've replaced him with an elderly Jewish New Yorker.  :-/  But at least I can sing.

Curlygirl22: Yeah, I had to learn the hard way, too. But any hormonal drugs have the potential to mess you up big time. Because hormones control everything in the body, something that alters, regulates or changes them in any way can change the way your body works...and it changes everything!
   One of my aunts takes Prednisone for her Still's Disease and it messed her up in all the same ways, just on a much larger scale. Poor gal.  :(

longhairdreams: Nope, no thyroid disorder. Just a body that's struggling to reclaim its old self...and winning.  ;)

Yesterday I did a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment and used up the last of my Suave Deep Conditioner. Oh man, it smelled funky, but at least it's gone now.

Today I did it again using Pantene's Intensive Restoration Treatment. Much better smell and much better results. And I made enough to use tomorrow also.

I washed today with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo, squeezed out the excess water with a towel, then left Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment in for well over an hour (yesterday, I left it in over 2 hours). After rinsing, I chased it with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, then with Suave Daily Moisture conditioner. My hair was soft and strong afterwards.

Spritzed on Pantene Light Spray Conditioner (trying to avoid the crown so it wouldn't get greased) before detangling with my RS #45. I think I am going to have to retire that faithful old comb soon.  :'(  One of the teeth is breaking off and hair gets caught in the crack & pulled off! I try to avoid using that area of the comb when wet combing, but it still gets me sometimes.
   It's even worse with my boyfriend, who rips it through his hair repeatedly...from the top down. I swear, that boy isn't going to have his new long locks very long at this rate! I've tried teaching him how to take care of it, but do you think he listens? Does any guy?  ::)

Anywho, I diluted my oil solution yesterday and used it today. It's better but still on the heavy side. I guess the aloe content really does make that big of a difference, given that it suspends the oil in the water longer.

Ah well. Hair dried nicely with the ends just slightly oily, so I put it up in a neat scrunchie bun.

The past 2 ½ days have been spent in a blind, mad rush of cleaning. Especially the bathroom, which hadn't been touched since before the dæmon ex-roommate left. It's quite a relief finally doing away with the evils he left behind.
   Speaking of evils, bleach has been a necessary one for removing his ghastly traces.  :P  And that is never good for someone who wears nothing but black. I've already destroyed a towel & 2 pairs of pants. Maybe more. Oops.  :-/

My boyfriend has actually helped out quite a bit, selling things at the swap meet or donating them, hanging mirrors and straightening up the living room. He says we will eventually get new linoleum flooring and repaint the walls.
   In time, it will be almost as if his idiot cousin was never here. I'm not even so upset about my ruined bookcase anymore, because I'll eventually get rid of it.

So I've been thoroughly exhausted and aching for the past few days, but my apartment is looking way better. Plus, I love the idea that I'm burning zillions of calories in the process. Reaping the double benefits.  ;)

That's all for now. C-ya!

Had to clarify today. I'm not sure when the last time I did that was, so I'd say it was definitely time. Plus, I didn't get to take a shower before work this morning, so I sat for 5 hours as a festering greaseball.  :P

Used Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse and Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. No leave-in's. Ahhh!

I wish to God that the Daily Moisture Renewal shampoo worked like it used to. I'd go back to Pantene completely in a heartbeat if it did! I'm sick of experiments gone awry. Oh why can't they make the crème shampoos good again??  :-/

Today I finally figured out my Fia hair type. I am 1aFi....and my ponytail is only about 1 ½ inches in circumference.  :o  Spiderwebs, I tell you. I have spiderwebs for hair!

In other news, health is failing a bit. Need to go grocery shopping...and actually sleep once in awhile.

My snake has become rather active during the day. He likes crawling all over the rock house that I built for him. He has learned to burrow and dig in the gravel in his terrarium as is natural for his type, and he seems very interested in everything that goes on outside of the terrarium. He often stretches up to sniff at the screens that open at the top. I think he wants out, and I can't blame him, but I also think that we're still mutually afraid to touch. He still tends to think of me as a "big, scary giant that wants to eat him" and I worry that he'll bite in his own defense, which would mean instant infection for me.  :P

Anyway, that's about it. I have a headache & really need to brush my teeth. Other than that, blah. That's about all I can say.  :-/

Been using Suave Daily Moisture shampoo, Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner (since I have tons of it under my bathroom sink still) and Suave Daily Moisture conditioner in that order.

Hair feels soft when wet but still frizzy & funky when dry. The Suave shampoo is most certainly not doing as much for my hair as Pantene's former DMR formula, but...what can ya do? *shrug*

For now, I'm just using what I have, getting rid of everything before buying anything new. What's the point? I already own everything out there that appeals to me and all of it sux.  :P  Just for different reasons.

What confuses me is why my hair has been so frighteningly frizzy lately. I swear, ALL of the shorter pieces are sticking out like crazy & giving me that stylish "electroshock" look.
   The weather is clear & hot, so it's not a humidity thing. And it can't be a cone (or lack thereof) problem because it does that whether I use them or not. My hair just seems to want to do its own thing for the moment, so I just keep it up with the usual velour scrunchies.

For now I'm trying to just do what I have to do (wash, condition, treat, detangle, oil) and just forget about it and get on with my day. If none of the things that I have lying around my bathroom can help it, then it just can't be helped.
   Right now, I'll just give it what it needs & wait for better things.

Angel, maybe you're in a growing stage where the shed hairs are getting longer and they're not long enough yet to lay down by themselves.

Thanx, Sakina...I suppose that's possible.  ???

Today I washed with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo & left Pantene's Intensive Restoration Treatment in for an hour. After rinsing that out, followed with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner, then Suave Daily Moisture conditioner.

Only one leave-in today: TRESemmé Detangle. I like the way it smells, but it's leaving my roots pretty greasy too.  :P  Not as bad as Pantene...

Today I was able to finish off my Suave Daily Moisture conditioner and get rid of the bottle. Also got rid of one little bottle of Pantene DMR conditioner. Yay! 2 down!  :D

I plan to find alternative uses for what remains of my Pantene DMR shampoo. A household cleaner, a bodywash, etc. and only use it on my hair as a last resort, after everything else is gone.

Today I finally washed all of my combs & brushes in the dishwasher, as I've been meaning to do for about 2 weeks. It's nice to have them all clean & gunk-free.
   My boyfriend has taken to using my seamless combs & leaving lots of scalp particles stuck to them & hair wrapped around the teeth.  >:(  Shameful the way he "takes care" of his hair. I've tried teaching him the right way so many times & he just doesn't listen. *sigh* Like with most everything, really.

My faithful RS #45 finally lost its loose tooth today.  :(  It broke off so cleanly that there don't seem to be any harsh edges or anything, but I'm not letting that side of the comb touch my hair anymore, just to be on the safe side.
   I tried detangling one side of my hair with my Conair seamless comb...and sadly, it doesn't work as well for the purpose as my RS #45. It's better for dry combing.

Didn't have time to oil today, as I was in something of a rush to get out of the apartment. Plus, my oil comb was still drying anyway.
   My boyfriend had one of his buddies over, and both were chowing down on burritos and trying to watch Jack eat the mice that my boyfriend had brought home for him. I reminded them that Jack doesn't like it when people watch him eat.
   Honestly, I don't get it. Snakes eat rodents every day. What's the big deal? I certainly don't feel the need to watch every single time it happens just to watch something die....ya know?  :P  But some people do...

We won't give pause until the blood is flowing

I need to watch things die... from a good safe distance
Vicariously I live while the whole world dies
You all feel the same, so...

Why can't we just admit it?

-Tool, Vicarious

That song plays through my head every time my boyfriend and one of his buddies gather around the terrarium to try and watch Jack eat. *sigh* That poor snake...

Anyway, it's late & I've worked all day. Time to crash.

I have that sticking out prob too :P
But i found something that could help. What i do is, when my hair is still wet, i comb my bangs (mine are chin length)to the back and then tie a scarf, banadana...ect. over it, then take it off when it dries, it looks really flat at first, but then you could comb/brush style or whatever.
HTH you too :)

Angel-

I have all these little hairs that stick straight out too, only mine are thick, wiry, and grey.  If yours are your hair color, count your blessings! ;)

Hope things are going better....Later.

Quote:

If yours are your hair color, count your blessings!  ;)

lol Alright, I guess I will!  ;)

Washed as usual today with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo, then left a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment (made with Pantene DMR conditioner) in for an hour. Rinsed and followed with Pantene DMR conditioner.

Sprayed in TRESemmé Detangle before wet combing with my broken RS #45. Didn't get to oil - my hair dried before my boyfriend got out of the bathroom.  ::)

Made the critical mistake today of going outside in the afternoon.  :P  I got lunch from Jamba Juice, then went shopping...in an outdoor mall.  :o  It was hot. *smacks forehead*
   The new Herbal Essences is out. I checked out the displays at Wal*Mart, and am anything but impressed. They're still in 12 oz. bottles, still the same price and 3 of the new lines have the 3 classic old fragrances. They have new lines, new fragrances, a whole new look & new vibe. The bottles are brightly coloured with a wave shape to them, and there's ditzy jargon and Q & A's on the back. Painfully marketed at teenagers.  :P

Today I also learned that the Biosilk conditioner contains oil.  >:(  I was so looking forward to trying it, too. Man, it's like the stars are aligned in a mutual conspiracy against me.
   I looked through every line at both Target and Wal*Mart and have come to a rather bleak conclusion: I hate everything.  :-/  More specifically, everything seems to hate my hair. I may have to look to a higher power when it comes to hair stuff.

Returned home feeling completely defeated and collapsed on my bed, falling asleep until 5 pm. 'Tis a decent hour to rise, but the sun is still out in full force. Few things I hate more than SoCal in the summer.  :P

I have a canker sore just below a bony impacted wisdom tooth that's making one entire side of my lower jaw hurt constantly and mercilessly. I squeezed too much oral analgesic gel on the area this morning and numbed about 50% of my mouth. haha Now I spot-apply it with a Q-tip.

Today, I dry oiled like a normal person, using a drop of olive oil on either side of my hair. It's alright, but I don't care for the "pulling" sensation, no matter how lightly, when running my palms down the length of my hair. I much prefer my wet oiling technique.

Tomorrow, my childhood best friend is getting married, so I suppose I'll be attending her wedding. We have been out of touch for several years, but she was a maid in my wedding, so I guess it's only right that I go to hers.
   Bad enough that I haven't a clue what to wear, nor anything clean to wear anyway (at the moment), I also have no idea what to do with my hair. It's going to be at the beach in the afternoon, so it will likely be windy and hot, but I worry that wearing my hair up will appear too formal.
   Now that I think about it, I'm totally unprepared for events such as this. Formal I can do, except that I don't own any pumps...just boots. And super casual is easy, just....nothing between the 2 extremes.  :-/  I have velour scrunchies and bobby pins up the wazoo, but no clips or small barrettes or anything. Wow, this is going to be tough. I almost wish I knew what everyone else will be wearing.
   Oy, my nails look bad, also.  :(  Maybe there's a way I can rock the slightly-underdressed, charming antisocial look. Guess we'll see...

The wedding yesterday was beautiful. The ceremony took place in my favourite part of town and the reception was held in the bride's parents' backyard. Everything was quite elegant, but with a kind of contemporary feel. The bride arranged every detail herself from bussing guests to and from the ceremony to the catering to the centerpieces on the tables at the reception. It must have been a pretty easy (yet still stressful) feat for her, being that she is a hotel concierge and arranges parties for a living. Beautiful job on her part.
 
I ended up just putting together a simple skirt, sleeveless top and boots. Minimal makeup and jewelry, and twisted my hair up almost to the top of my head, securing with 2 bobby pins and letting the ends do whatever they wanted. Not my favourite style, but it worked.
   90% of my "makeup" was actually high-powered sunblock, and I ended up being the only person at the end of the night who hadn't gotten sunburned. Ironic, of course, because I was the palest person there.

It was good to see so many people that I'd been close to while growing up, whom I hadn't seen in years. The bride's father even remarked that I looked younger now than when he last saw me, and asked if I'd taken some sort of anti-aging potion.  ;D  I get that a lot, actually, given that I admittedly don't appear a day over 19. Aquaintances often mistake me for being younger than my 22-year-old sister, which makes both of us laugh.

Years of estrangement between the bride and I had definitely taken their toll, and we didn't find much to talk about. I did spend more time hanging out and talking with her family. Her older sister gushed how she hadn't seen me in years...she is usually so stoic and mature that her moments of pure sentiment really catch me off guard. Like I never know how much she likes me until then...I wonder if others get the same impression of me.

Anyway, all in all a good night (except for my wisdom tooth which hurt so badly, I had to OD on painkillers  :P). My parents and I sayed fairly late, but not as late as others because we all had to work the next day.
   When we arrived back at my parents' place, my father took care of my ailing car and told me to visit more often. I agreed to do so, aware that distance tends to make us miss one another.

It was about 11:00 pm when I finally returned home, worn and tired after a long day exposed to the elements. My boyfriend came home just as I was going to bed...said he'd been out with a friend. *eyeroll* I was tired and figured that I could just take care of everything the next morning, so I ended up falling asleep with my makeup on et al. Fortunately, I did remember to take the pins out of my hair.  :-/

Today was my day to recover. I did a simple wash and condition with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo and Pantene DMR conditioner. Spritzed TRESemmé Detangle leave-in conditioner on the length of my hair before wet combing from the ears down. The crown of my head doesn't really need to be touched.

I exfoliated and masqued my face today to compensate for not washing it last night and to completely eliminate any leftover traces of sunblock or makeup. Today I'm just going to let my skin breathe.

While my masque was on, I oiled the ends of my hair, which is now almost dry. After brushing my teeth, I suppose I'll head out and pick up something to eat before going in to work.

Once again, I have no idea where my wayward beau has gone. Probably playing disc golf again, rather than doing what needs to be done. *sigh* But...whatever. I'm just going to worry about myself for now.

Yesterday, I wrote all of my new contact info on a piece of paper and slipped it into the bride's wedding card box. I really need to have personal calling cards made up like they used in the Victorian era. They're classy and convenient...and really help in situations like yesterday's. I wish I could have given one out to everyone there. I should look into that...

Another thought: I must give my Scissor Lady a call to schedule my trim for July.

Until next time.

The Victorian Trading Company has calling cards.  There are other, cheaper places, or you can buy the sheets of cards and print out your own.  I'm not overly fond of the rough, perforated edges of the DIY cards, but they're cheap and easy.   8)

Ooh thanx for the tip, 13. Those are very pretty....but I'm looking for something a little darker.  ;)

Ahem. Yesterday, after a whopping 3 hours' sleep, I got up for the morning shift at work (UGH!) and decided, stupidly, to wash with Pantene DMR shampoo (UGH! UGH!) and follow with the matching conditioner. My hair was instantly coated in a thick layer of waxy, disgusting polish and looked like I hadn't washed it in days.
   Oh Angel, when will you ever learn?! Just let it go, girl. It's not going to get better.  ::)

So I spent the day with greaseball hair.  :P

Today, I washed twice with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, and used a 1L vinegar rinse in between. Followed with Herbal Essences Clean-Rinsing conditioner. No leave-in's today either.
   My hair smells great (I already miss the old Herbal Essences), but is STILL coated with the gross, waxy, greasy remnants of Pantene.  >:(

I'm not sure what to do now. It looks like I'll just have to clarify every day until the greasy roots are gone.  :-/

Oy, I don't think I'll ever buy Pantene again. Even if they change their formulas yet again. Especially not the crème shampoos. They have caused me way too much strife over time and in important situations. I should not have had to go to my grandmother's funeral looking like I'd washed my hair with motor oil.  >:(  I should not have to compensate with 2 days of clarifying for just one wash with DMR!  >:(  I should not have to shell out that much of my hard-earned $$$ for crap that doesn't work!  >:(  OH, I hate them!
http://www.edgillett.com/images/MachineGunKitty.gif

I am now avoiding anything distributed by Procter & Gamble whenever possible. They are an evil corporate empire with dual diabolical missions to screw me over personally and maim innocent lab animals.  :P

I rather wish that Softsoap made hair products. Wouldn't that be cool?  ;)

Until then, I will just continue to use what I have until it's all gone.

Yesterday, I took my boyfriend to the locally famous Casa de Pico for dinner. I had my usual Tacos Victoriosos, which is 2 tacos with lightly fried shells, shredded beef, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, etc. etc. plus 3 salsas in separate bowls and a concha of pico beans. hehe My boyfriend said that he wished he'd gotten what I had.  ;D  It was his first visit to Casa de Pico (such a gorgeous place!) and I'll bet he can't wait to go back. Especailly after that giant raspberry margarita he sucked down.  ::)  :P

After that, we went to the Target across the parking lot and got a bunch of stuff. I got both of Softsoap's Pure Cashmere bodywashes and like them a lot! Softsoap & Dial are my favourites... now if only I could find hair stuff that I was as happy with. *sigh!*

So today I had the morning shift, with my 2nd job immediately following. After that came errands. I didn't get a shower until after 8:00!  >:(  Bleagh! Talk about a greaseball.

I washed twice with Pantene Purity shampoo with a vinegar rinse in between, then conditioned with Pantene DMR conditioner. Decided to finish things off with something new. Earlier in the day, I had mixed up a little bit of honey, some milk and a lot of hot water in a 1L bottle. I left this milk & honey rinse in the freezer & fridge until my laundry was done.

I poured the rinse through my hair and didn't rinse it out. No leave-in's, just air drying...my hair felt strange & smelled like milk.  :-/  Then I noticed that a strand of hair from underneath was dry already and felt quite starchy. So I decided to make the most of it and started scrunching the rest of my hair while it was still damp into waves.
   My hair dried like that, so now I have this starchy, wavy "beach hair." haha This is why I tried the new milk & honey rinse at night, when I didn't have to go anywhere but to bed.  ;D  If I ever decide to try it again, I'll rinse it out next time.

Good news is, I finally got all of the grease, grime, oil and Pantene gunk out of my roots!  ;D  I will never use a Pantene crème shampoo again! In fact, Pantene will be lucky if I buy anything besides their treatments anymore.  >:(

Tomorrow, I'll go back to using up my Suave Daily Moisture shampoo and Pantene DMR conditioner. I may do a Snowy's Treatment, too. My hair probably needs an extra moisture boost after all that clarifying!

I'm still not sure what I'll get after all of my bottles of this, that and the other are used up & gone. But it will take awhile to go through them, which leaves plenty of time for something new & exciting to come out. Here's hoping.

Still haven't called my Scissor Lady yet. I really need to get on that so I can hope to schedule a trim close to the 1st.

It appears that my boyfriend has once again been sucked into the abyss tonight. He left to get dessert almost 2 hours ago.  :'(  *sigh* I'm not sure I even want to know...

Alright, I figured I should make an entry now before today becomes tomorrow.

Sadly, I waited way too long before washing my hair today, so I had to clarify. Pantene Purity shampoo, twice, with a vinegar rinse in between. Same as always. But on a good note, I was able to finish off my other 13.5 oz. bottle of Pantene DMR conditioner. One more bottle down! Yes!  ;D

Tomorrow, I'll go back to using Suave Daily Moisture shampoo, and break out my 25.4 oz. bottle of Pantene DMR conditioner. It's the last bottle of DMR conditioner that I have, and I will use it as a regular conditioner until my bottle of Suave shampoo is gone. Then I will switch over to the remains of my old Herbal Essences, and use the rest of the Pantene DMR conditioner for Snowy's Moisture Treatments only.

Still haven't called my trim lady. Man! What's wrong with me?! I haven't really done anything today! I hate that!!  >:(  It's like I completely let one whole day of my limited life go to waste. UGH! What the heck, man?!  >:(

Tomorrow, I must do a lot to make up for it. Well, I did a load of laundry tonight...does that count?  ???

My boyfriend is out at the pier fishing with his idiot cousin. And has been there for the past, oh...3 ½ hours? It's totally dark outside, but nevermind that...  :-/
   *shrug* He's been kind of a jerk for awhile yet anyway. This morning, he was all moody, just throwing things around, so naturally, I asked him what was wrong.
   "Nothing," was his reply. "Or at least nothing that I care to talk about."  *eye-freaking-roll* God, what a chick!  :P  I just shrugged and walked away. What else can one do at that point? If he wants to kill whatever is left of the relationship by lack of communication, so be it. If it's going to die, then let it die.
   Besides, if it was more of his faithless Doom's Day anti-American, anti-Christian, alien conspiracy bs, I don't want to hear it anyway.  ::)  He's been really big on that lately & it's all driving me up the wall. In addition to all of his other wonderful habits.  :P

I realized today that a relationship should never get to the point of "I don't want to hear it." Oh, I know it happens. But it shouldn't. If your lover has something to say, you'd better listen, darnit! And if you would seriously rather not listen (or rather that they not talk) because you think they're a lunatic, there's a problem.

I've been thinking an awful lot today (and writing an awful lot) about someone I should no longer be thinking about. Certain ghosts from the past belong in the past. And yet this ghost has been crossing my mind often. God help me, I'm going crazy....crazier.  ::)

I think really I'm just bored. My life is in the same boring rut that it was when this "ghost from the past" first wandered in and shook things up. I remain grateful to this person for doing so, but maybe I wish I had someone like him - no, someone far better - to shake things up again.

Anyway, no leave-in's today. My hair feels thin as ever, but soft. Like spiderweb.
   Speaking of spiderweb...don't you hate that awful snapping sound in your ears when you walk into one?! Not to mention that feeling that something's on you and you have to do a boogie dance to get it off.
   Oy! That happened to me last night as I was looking for a place to hang the floormats for my car after washing them. I figured I'd just hang them on the fence on the side of the house as usual. I even swung one of the mats in front of me to break down any invisible spiderwebs that might have been there. But of course, I walked right into one anyway. And the spastic hokey pokey followed naturally. Along with some girly shrieks. lol

Alright, I'm going to put my laundry in the dryer and get some shut-eye. Lord only knows when Bozo The Clown will be home. But he shall not sink my Cheerio, oh no. My hair will not suffer! Yeah, ok. Goodnight.

Spiders, lots of fun!  Since we moved to the other flat we have been having problems with this ugly black bug in the bedroom.  I don't know they are but lastnight one bit me!  It was in a pair of shorts I had on the bed. It really hurt!  I squished the little begger, who, bit me on my bum.  Man I got a dime sized welt from that one.  Needless to say I was doing the figget all night.

Ack, ack ack!! Bug bites suck!  :P  Hope yours goes away soon, Lisabelle.

Man, is it hot today!  >:(  Few things I hate more than SoCal in the summer. Ugh! But July will be here soon. Very soon. Wow, as in next weekend! And the quicker it goes by, the quicker August will arrive. Ahhh. What in August could possibly have a heliophobic goth all riled up? Well....everything, not counting the sweltering heat.
   
August marks several important events for goths. For one, all of the autumn/Halloween goodies come out at Michaels! And what goth couldn't spend an entire day in the air conditioning, surrounded by Halloween goods?
   For two, many clothing companies start getting their black velvet and lace-laden frocks in for the fall/winter seasons. All hail bebe's ultra-gawthy fall lineup!
   For three, Bats Day falls on the 20th this year, and I am definitely going to try to make it! I have an annual pass and a working vehicle. There's just no excuse for missing it this time.

But yeah....that's August.

Today, I washed with Suave Daily Moisture shampoo and left a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment in for an hour. Then rinsed out and followed with Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. Ahhhhh...
   My only leave-in so far has been TRESemmé Detangle. My hair always dries before I can oil it these days - it's nuts! Maybe I'll use the dreaded dry oiling technique later on.

I tried calling the scissor lady today. She wasn't home.  :(  That's not good seeing as she'll need advanced notice and I want to schedule a trim as close to the 1st as possible. Oy. I'll try back later, I think.

The onyx and marcasite brooch that I ordered last week arrived on Friday! Woohoo! It's lovely. I think the next thing I order from Target.com will be a bedframe. haha

Tonight, I'm going to my parents' place to pick up the floormats that I left drying on their back fence and try and clean the spilt mocha mess out of my car.  :P  It has no cupholders, so if I have a drink in the car and have to hit the brakes really fast because some idiot almost runs into me at an intersection when I have the bloody right of way, then it's a fiasco. But I digress.  ::)

Anyway, that's all for now. I'm off to browse JMC to see if they have anything new.

"I tried bodysurfing once, but how often do you find a corpse?"

wrote on Jun 25^th, 2006 at 8:25pm:

"I tried bodysurfing once, but how often do you find a corpse?"

LOL!  That's great.  ;D

Quote:

Bats Day falls on the 20th this year

I must know; what IS Bats Day??  

Also, I've been meaning to ask...if I'm drawn to the "dark side" of things, so to speak, but would probably never have the guts to go 100% Goth--does that make mean I'm, like, a closet Goth??   :)

wrote on Jun 25^th, 2006 at 4:29am:

I even swung one of the mats in front of me to break down any invisible spiderwebs that might have been there. But of course, I walked right into one anyway. And the spastic hokey pokey followed naturally. Along with some girly shrieks. lol

**giggle**

Quote:

Also, I've been meaning to ask...if I'm drawn to the "dark side" of things, so to speak, but would probably never have the guts to go 100% Goth--does that make mean I'm, like, a closet Goth??

hehehe Trisha....could be.  ;)  Though it probably just means that you're "darkly inclined."

And to answer your question, Bats Day In The Fun Park is an annual goth event held in and around the Disneyland Park and Resort area. You can find out more about it at http://www.batsday.net

Only 13 more days of glutes training left. I may just be delusional, but I think I've noticed something of a difference. Ah well. What I really need is cardio. I must try to make it to the beach as often as possible this summer.

Now...hair. 3 bottles down! Woohoo! Yesterday I finished up my Suave Daily Moisture shampoo, and went out with a bang. Did a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment for an hour, then rinsed and followed with Pantene DMR conditioner. Actually had time to oil yesterday, so all was good.

Today, I used the last of my Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo and Clean-Rinsing conditioner. Used the old Herbal Essences leave-in, but didn't have time to oil. I was late to work as it was, after putting on my typical summer goth regalia...only to have it rain today.  :-/

Pantene has 2 new lines that I'm interested in: Ice Shine and Restoratives Time Renewal. But I'm not sure. I'm still apprehensive about shelling out that kind of $$ for Pantene when they messed up my DMR line so badly. Maybe I'm just being childish and vindictive and holding a grudge. I understand that companies change and renew their products at will, so getting too attached to something seems like a mistake almost. If I'd taken Pantene Restoratives with me to WA instead of DMR, my hair would have been perfect for my grandmother's funeral. So...we'll see. It will be at least another month before I have to worry about buying new hair stuff again.

For quite awhile, I've been wanting to make my own gawthy hairtoys. Just start with some basic, hair-friendly accessories and add dark flowers, ribbons, strips of black lace, etc. to them. Then see what kinds of different, messy, tragic updos I can make with them. Man, I need a digicam!

I'm still flirting with the idea of colouring my hair.  :-/  Perhaps I'll experiment with different semi-permanent (level 1) colours - the kind that last about a week and only coat the hair, but don't penetrate it. Just to see which colour I like best.

Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with my fawnish light brown. I think that light brown hair in general is beautiful in its own right, and I love the red tint that my Celtic heritage has given to mine.
   Light brown has an innocent, natural and universal appeal about it...but does it readily scream, "GOTH!" Not really. Certain hair colours just lend themselves to the look better than others do. I don't know why.

Just an entirely hypothetical idea, of course. I don't know if I would ever colour my hair again after swearing  it off so long ago. Lord knows there's certainly more important things to spend my hard-earned $$ on...like fall shopping sprees!  ;D

Well, that's all for now. Peace!

wrote on Jun 27^th, 2006 at 7:56pm:

I'm still apprehensive about shelling out that kind of $$ for Pantene when they messed up my DMR line so badly. Maybe I'm just being childish and vindictive and holding a grudge. I understand that companies change and renew their products at will, so getting too attached to something seems like a mistake almost.

No, you're not being silly.  I really hate it when companies "change" formulas on me at random.... :P

What's wrong with being attached to a product that works for you?

Quote:

I understand that companies change and renew their products at will, so getting too attached to something seems like a mistake almost.

Yeah, but why do they insist on fixin' what ain't broken??  And they ALL do it--from shampoo to the food industry.  Why can't good enough be good enough?!   >:(

I totally agree, novusfemina & Trisha. Companies should leave well enough alone, but they don't. Why? Because fresh appeal brings fresh $$$. Companies want to stay current as much as the rest of us. Maybe they want to market to a different audience or latch onto the latest trends. Or perhaps the materials that they typically use to make their products go up in price, so they use new materials to cut costs. There are lots of reasons. But ultimately, it's all done in the name of the almighty dollar.

Anyway, I've been using up the remains of the Fruit Fusions Hydrating formulas. Yesterday, I did a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment. Today I washed twice. Leave-in's have been Herbal Essences old conditioning spray. *sigh* It will be missed. Yesterday I oiled. Today I didn't have time.

Today I helped one of the reps in the credit dept. play a joke on another rep. Rep #1 bought flowers for rep #2 and had me arrange them in a vase from rep #1's home...so they would look like they'd been delivered that morning. I even clipped the bush just outside of my office for some added greenery. Then I added water and rep #1 had me make out a little floral tag with our office address & the name of a local floral company that I completely made up. Rep #1 had me make out the tag because rep #2 would recognize her handwriting. Anyway, we had it say "To: [rep #2], From: [the company's most notorious...erm....opportunist, shall we say]. Then I walked in and delivered the arrangement to rep #2, who was floored. She even called said opportunist to thank him!  ;D  It was a hoot.

Anyway, temps are still soaring out here. So much for rain!  >:(  What's worse is that I live in a 2nd story apartment with no a/c...in the middle of a dirty concrete jungle. Ugh!  :P  This is torture.

To make matters even worse, my boyfriend is still being a jerk. heh So what else is new?  ::)  I'll only continue this charade until a.) I can miraculously afford to support myself,  b.) I can't stand it any longer, or  c.) he leaves. Things will be easier once we reach WA, one way or another. I must keep that in mind.

Well, that's all for now. It's just miserable. Work, work, work. Hot, hot, hot.  :P

3 more bottles down.  ;D

Yesterday I finished off the Fruit Fusions Hydrating shampoo and my Pantene Intensive Restoration Treatment. Today I finished the Fruit Fusions Hydrating conditioner. Thank goodness, too - it's been burning the back of my neck. But it shall burn me no longer...begone!!

Today, I had some time as I was waiting for the washer & dryer to be freed up....so I decided to give my hair some extra TLC.
   Washed twice with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo, then did a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment (made with Pantene DMR conditioner & extra aloe, as always). Left it in for over an hour, rinsed, then followed with the last of my Fruit Fusions Hydrating conditioner. Then used the Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner. Lastly, I finished with a milk & honey rinse, which was rinsed out.

I spritzed my hair down with Herbal Essences Leave-In Conditioner before detangling with my broken RS #45. That's when I first noticed trouble. My hair was rather difficult to detangle...there was unusual resistance. I knew it had to be caused by the milk & honey rinse.  :(

With the insufferable heat, I ended up falling asleep before my hair dried. I made sure not to lay on it, and it was still straight when I woke up.

Once my senses were recovered, it was time to measure. 22 ¼ inches was the grand total for this month. What?! That couldn't be right! I measured again.
   Sure enough, 22 ¼! What the heck, man?! A quarter inch of growth in a month? In the middle of the summer, no less! And after getting ½" last month....how could this happen??
   Maybe that milk & honey rinse was a bad idea. Maybe my hair was wavier than I thought after sleeping. Maybe all of this light & heat is actually causing the growth rate to slow?? Too weird. I'll measure again tomorrow.

Just got off the phone with my scissor lady. FINALLY!! I have a trim scheduled for Friday morning at 9:00.  8)  Woohoo!!
   My last trim of the year. After that, I can readjust my ticker & find out whether I will reach my short-term goal this year. *fingers crossed*

"Karma police, arrest this man..."
   Well it seems that life hasn't gotten any better for the dæmon ex-roommate. Apparently, all of the months he invested in massage therapy school have amounted to nothing. I'm not sure what became of the business that he shared with his accupuncturist roommate....especially after discovering that his gf and said roommate were having an affair.
   In any case, he's now working at a local gas station for $8/hr. *chuckle....giggle* LOL!!!
   I know I shouldn't laugh at another's misfortune....but I like to think of this as karmic retribution.
"This is what you get when you mess with us"  Bwahahahahahaaaaaa!!!

Anyway, so....Friday. I must do all that I can to have my hair in tip top shape by then.

Oh yes, and things are much happier on the homefront. My boyfriend has stopped being a drama queen long enough for us to work things out. lol I swear, that guy is more of a chick than I am.  ::)

Nothing else to report. 'Til next time.

(quotes courtesy of "Karma Police" by Radiohead)  ;D

Angel-

"Darkly inclined"....I like that.... :)

Today's routine was simple enough. Washed once with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo, conditioned twice with the matching conditioner.
   Sprayed in Herbal Essences Leave-In Conditioner before detangling, as usual, with my broken RS #45. Just left my hair down to air dry...more like get blown around by all of the fans in the apartment.

When my hair was mostly dry, I experimented with a double bun updo, and added my first homemade gothic hairtoys - black roses on barrettes. Didn't turn out so well.  :(  But that's why it's called an experiment, right?
   If my hair had been drier and my hands not recently moisturized, it may have been neater. But the barrettes didn't turn out the way I wanted, either. I'll see about making them with a different type of barrette.

I will have to learn how to make various kinds of slightly messy updo's. See what I can come up with...

My parents had bought me a ticket for the county fair & called me early this morning, asking if I wanted to go with them. I wanted to, but couldn't.  :(  I was nowhere near ready & still had laundry to do. So I won't get to go this year.  :(  *sigh*  But it's alright, I guess. It will only be running for a few more days, so everything I would want to see is probably gone already. Besides, walking through 90° heat on the black pavement, whilst wearing all black isn't my idea of fun anyway.  :P

God, what a boring day! I mean, I did absolutely nothing, and I hate that!! It's like losing a day from life. What's the point of the gift if you don't use it? It's depressing...and coincidentally, my music of choice for the moment seems to fit the feeling perfectly: "Let Down" by Radiohead.  :-/

Anyway, tomorrow should be more eventful. I'll do a Snowy's Treatment...and maybe go all out in full summer goth mode for work. Actually look like I made the effort instead of like I just rolled out of bed & threw on yesterday's clothes (which I sometimes do).

Friday is my trim...I have to pamper my hair until then.

Oh yes, I measured again this morning, and still find the length at 22 ¼ inches.  :(  Yes, I suppose ¼" of growth is better than nothing, but I was hoping for at least twice that. *sigh* Yet another let down. *Plays the song again* Something is wrong. I should have gotten at least ½ inch! Alright, Angel, just....let it go. No point.

Disappointing day. Maybe some online shopping will cheer me up (doubt it). Peace, people.

Maybe some hair toy shopping? :-/  Can't hurt,right?

Yikes. When I hoped that the next day would be "more eventful," I certainly did not mean like this!!

So much for full summer goth mode. After only 2 ½ hours of sleep, I got out of bed, did my morning exercises and whipped up a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment.

After showering, washing once with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo, I applied said treatment & left it in for exactly an hour. I like it much better when they're timed precisely.
   After rinsing, I followed with Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner.

Sprayed on the usual Herbal Essences Leave-In Conditioner before detangling with my RS #45...then after my hair had dried just a little, I sprayed a bit of Pantene Daily Renewal Treatment on the length. Then I threw my oil spray bottle and oil comb into my purse & dashed off to work, figuring that I would arrive with ample time to oil the ends of my hair at work.

Dead wrong.  :(

At the intersection just before my work parking lot, my car died. I immediately put on my distress signals and tried to restart it....nothing. Again and again I tried, but to no avail.
   A police car pulled up behind me and the officer stepped out. heh That's one advantage of working across the street from the local courthouse - there's always a cop nearby. He came over to my window & asked what happened. I told him that my car had suddenly died. He had me put it in park & start it again, which it was willing to do, but shifting into drive, it did nothing.
   At first, the officer suggested that I call a towing service, but I ended up calling my mother in the office and explaining what happened. She told me to ask some of the other associates in the store for help. Thank God that my position allows me to be so well-acquainted with everyone, because within minutes, I had the store manager, the warehouse manager and a few other brawny, male associates pushing my poor Mercedes into the lot, with the officer following. After thanking all of them for their help, I ran into the office, clocked in and gave further details to my mother. She then called my father, and I got to repeat the story. Thank God that he works nearby and that his day was done already...he was in my work parking lot within minutes, checking things out.
   
As fate would have it, my transmission is completely shot, and it will cost about $3,000 for a new one.  :o  Not only do I not have that kind of scratch at this point in time (especially right now), but the car isn't even worth enough to justify that kind of an expense. No, I fear that today was my last ride with old Cedric.  :'(  Which leaves me SOL for the time being.

After leaving my boyfriend 2 voicemails, briefly explaining what had happened, he finally called me back a few hours later. He said he would drive me home when my shift was over...and he did. And I introduced him to a co-worker who had wanted to meet him. And for awhile, everything seemed almost ok.

Until we started driving, that is. Then he jumped into jerk mode. Of course, after the day I'd had, that was all I needed. I went into emotional overload, which always results in a complete shut-down. When emotions are useless, I turn to logic. So I set thinking about what to do about my car situation.

With some serious budget tweaking, I might be able to afford payments on something new (something with cupholders, perhaps!!!). My father said that he would take me car shopping within the next few days, if that was the route that I wanted to take. And as far as I can see, that's the only way. As dearly as I love my partner-in-crime Mercedes, it simply isn't worth its own repair bills.

So things are all up in a whirl right now. A new car would mean serious changes...a new job, a new place, who knows? And who would have thought that a simple wish for more excitement would result in major, life-altering happenstance?  :-/

Good Lord, first my grandmother, then my dog, now my car! No mercy. It's rather frightening to think that with all that this year has taken from me, it's only half over.  :(  I need to have a good cry....just as a release of tension. But it will only happen when it's ready.

Alright....enough drama!!!!!

I like to read your work. So, so sorry about the car. What year was it? .
G

Thanx, naturalauburn.

It was a 1991 Mercedes 190E that I nicknamed Cedric. He will be missed.  :'(

I feel that  car pain.  I burried a 60 and 92 Valient, and a 84 land cruiser ( had just made it wonderful  husband wrecked it), Its hard to say goodbye. Im close with my Dad too.

I dream of a Mercedes, but I crave a 83-85 DLS
 Im new so sorry about typing that!I read the intro that we are not supposed to talk about stuff here, where do I talk to you?

G

Sorry about the car! :( RIP,Cedric....A beautiful car is waiting for you and you will be ok.

Another night on the couch. Got very little sleep again last night, but was able to talk things out with a friend over AIM first, which helped a bit.
   Finally got some of the tears out after listening to Radiohead's "Fake Plastic Trees." Something about the melody and the way the song progressed just brought them out naturally. It was rather cathartic...but I have more still to shed.

Between then and now, I've pretty well decided on buying a new car if the payments can be made low enough. Money would be tighter than ever, but it seems to be my only practical option. If I don't do this now, I'd just end up doing it next year or perhaps the year after. And I don't foresee the future being any more stable than the present. I must act.

As far as hair goes, I washed twice today with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo, then did a Snowy's Deep Moisture Treatment for about 2 hours. Rinsed and chased with Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner. My hair feels wonderfully soft when wet.

Herbal Essences Leave-In Conditioner afterward, as always, then let my hair dry just a little bit before spritzing Pantene Daily Renewal Treatment onto the length. Let dry a little bit more, then oiled the ends.
   My hair looks & feels healthiest on the top, where the least product is. The length is a little crunchy from the Daily Renewal Treatment and the ends are greasy from the oil. But that's alright, because it's all twisted into the usual velour scrunchie bun anyway. Out of sight, out of mind.

I suppose this is how it will be until all of my remaining hair stuff is gone. I will probably have to start buying Suave everything if I get a new car, which I'm not thrilled about, but I suppose I can live with it. We all have to make sacrifices. My hair is no exception, I suppose. For now, though, I'm not spending any money....just using up what I have.

Circumstances as they are, I have no idea how I'm going to make my Friday hair appointment.  :(  Boy, this is gonna get interesting.

Things are no better on the relationship front...but at least it's giving me something to write on. Little phrases are going through my head, which means that a poem is likely in the works. Maybe song lyrics. We'll see how it materializes.
   Not to mention, he'll eventually be the one crying when I love someone better.

Right now, I'm deserted...my friends, family and boyfriend are all out and I am stranded without wheels. Man, it sux to be a prisoner in your own home...not that it's anything new to me.

And that's all she wrote.

((hugs))I know how you feel, mind you I do not drive, I would rather ride a mule!  
Sorry to hear about your car.  What you can do is find out the price it is now and take a 1000 bucks off and sell it.  A good car to get is a Volvo, the live forever! I suggest a 900 or a 940.

Hair: Washed twice with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo, then did another Snowy's Treatment...for over an hour, I'm sure. After rinsing that out, I followed with Herbal Essences Replenishing conditioner.
   
Sprayed in Herbal Essences Leave-In Conditioner and detangled with my RS#45. Hair was a little resistant...so I spritzed in a little Pantene Daily Renewal Treatment also. No oil today.  :(

During my break at work, I examined my hair in the mirror before brushing it and putting it up in a loose bun. The broken pieces are definitely moving, slowly but surely, down the length of my hair. They're about 8 or 9 inches from my scalp, which means that they're at least 16 - 18 months old (but probably older). And that means that they were likely sustained due to extremely high levels of stress. Beyond 16 months ago, my life was a scary mess.  :P  So it makes sense.

Work: As I was finishing up my shift at my 1st job, the Area Vice President asked me to step into his office.  :o He promised that it was nothing bad. But still....  :o
   I was nervous (I was thinking that he was going to ask why I always wore black or something), but he said I didn't have to be, and asked me to have a seat in one of the chairs by his desk. He then explained to me that I was getting a raise!! Not a huge one, but my first-ever raise with this company just the same.  :D
   He then told me that he'd been flooded with compliments by customers...compliments about me! Raving about how "pleasant" I was!!
   He also asked if I planned to stay with the company awhile (he sounded hopeful). Apparently, he seems to think that I have potential, and he would make sure that I got a full-time position if one came available in another department.  :o
   As I left his office, beaming & blushing, he finished by saying, "Good job!"

By the time my boyfriend came to pick me up, I was grinning ear to ear.

I went from that to my 2nd job where a paycheck was waiting for me! Woohoo!  ;D

Life: My father scored the deal of a lifetime on a new car for me. A family friend works at a Toyota dealership, and my father had them hold a brand new, Phantom Gray Corolla CE just for me. He was able to get it at $5,000 off the regular price as well. As of 7:00 tomorrow morning, that car is officially MINE!!!  :D

No word yet on my ex-husband's condition. It's ironic. All of these good things are happening to me while he lies in a coma in the hospital. All of this happiness, but with a heavy & sad undertone. It's strange. Should I feel guilty?
   I feel...grateful. Truly blessed. Because I have all of these new & wonderful opportunities in life. Because I have each & every day conscious, to spend as I choose. Because I actually get to enjoy and see and live through each day. He doesn't.  :(  Many people don't.  :(  So I'm grateful that I can.

I had a dream about him last night. That he survived and I saw him. And I hugged him just because I was so thankful that he was alive...but he was different. Kind of trembling and fragile. But at least he was alive.
   I told my boyfriend about this dream and he said, "Maybe he woke up. You should find out." He then added, "That's when they speak to you. While you're asleep."
   I hope to God he's right. It sounds half crazy. But only half. On the other hand, he just might have something there. At least, I want to believe he does.
   I imagine that if my ex's condition had improved, I would have heard about it by now. But I mustn't lose faith. I'm going to keep praying...and I hope that everyone else will do the same. I'm trying to get as many people praying for him as possible.
 
Even if we're not part of each other's lives any longer, a life is still a life...and horrible things like this just shouldn't happen.

Anyway, it's late and I am going to get my hair trimmed tomorrow after all.  :D  My boyfriend agreed to take me. I'll have him get one too.  ;)

So until then.......goodnight, all.

Good for you sistah!  Congratulations are in order for your raise and for your new set of wheels, finally, some good comes your way!  ;)

I said prayers for your ex last night, I hope they come through for him.

Good luck w/ your trim today, I'm in need of (another) one myself, but I'm procrastinating because I love the length it's at.  Yeah, yeah, I know, procrastination is a  bad bad thing, but this is me we're talking about... ::)

So much for my trim.  >:(

I woke up early, jumped in the shower...washed once with Herbal Essences Replenishing shampoo and followed with the like conditioner.

Sprayed on a heavy dose of Herbal Essences Leave-In Conditioner all over my head & detangled with my RS #45. Then doused my hair in oil spray, using up the last of the bottle.

Jumped into my boyfriend's truck and headed wayyy out to East County to see the scissor lady...just to be greeted by an empty house. I tried calling before we left home and she didn't answer then.
   So we left her place in search of something to eat. After that, I went to call Scissor Lady again, but discovered that she'd left a voicemail on my phone....saying that she'd been called into work that morning and would call me next week to reschedule.

>:( AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  >:(  >:(  Why couldn't she have done that before we drove all the way out there? Well, I'm not going to complain too much. I love her. It's just quite an inconvenience to my boyfriend & his gas bill. Not to mention to my hair!

So now I have to go through the rest of the day as a total greaseball. Man, is this gonna be fun!  :P

At least I get my car today.  ;D  My father is leaving it in the parking lot at my work, and I'll be driving it back to their place when I'm finished. I'm going to try and help them demolish their kitchen. They're totally remodeling it.

Anyway, so that's my story for today.  :-/

Cover your Hair!!!!!  All that dust and ick from the demo. work will be all in your hair especially if you are all greasy!  How's the new car?? ;D

Quote:

It's just quite an inconvenience to my boyfriend & his gas bill

Not to talk bad about your bf, Angel, but I wouldn't worry about it too much--I'm sure it's the least he could do, given everything you put up with from him!   ;)  

Curlgirl64: The new car is GREAT!! It's a very basic model, but the a/c works wonderfully, which is mandatory here in SoCal. It has a cd player, which I've never had before in a vehicle. And it even has cupholders!!  ;D  Those desperate trips to Starbucks between jobs will be much easier now.
   It has a cloth interior, which I've also never had and actually prefer. Leather is horrid during the scorching hot summer months & bloody cold in the winter. Plus, you can vacuum, shampoo and steam clean a cloth interior, which sterilizes it. Leather has to be polished & oiled. Bleagh!
   
Trisha:  lol I think you may be onto something there.  ;)

Man, what a busy weekend! I spent almost all of it at my parents' house, helping them remodel their kitchen. It's going to be beautiful when it's all done, I'm sure, but what a lot of work! Egad, they're knocking down walls, hanging drywall, rewiring everything. My boyfriend is doing their new plumbing...for free.  :)  What a good guy!

My mother and sister went to the hospital on Saturday to see my former husband, and I went with them. They could only take one of us in at a time, so my mother went in first while my sister & I stood in the hallway, talking with my former father-in-law. Next, it was my sister's turn, so my mother & I talked with former FIL.
   While my sister was in there, my ex nodded off & fell asleep, completely exhausted from the events of the day. He needed his rest, so I didn't bother going in to see him. I had learned enough from my former FIL to be greatly encouraged.
   My former MIL had asked if he wanted to see me. She said he had looked confused and then gave her a thumbs down. She didn't know what to make of that. It was shortly before he fell asleep, so he either didn't want to see me or didn't understand. But it's alright.
   Both of my former in-laws were very grateful that my family & I had shown up. It was good to see them again, but I don't plan to make a habit of it or anything. The past still belongs in the past.

I hope and pray that my ex will make a complete recovery...and hopefully come back to the world a bit wiser this time around.

I also learned new details surrounding his accident. It was 3:30 am when he crashed in a desolate area of my hometown. A friend of my sister's said that they had seen him at a bar earlier that night. When my father heard this, he was immediately convinced that my ex had been drinking before the accident. He is an alcoholic. And I'm sorry to say, but if that was the case, then he got what was coming to him. Hopefully this will be a real wake up call for him.
   He hadn't been speeding, but he did have some alcohol in his system. Enough to impair his judgment, I wonder?

Anyway, today I have an interview with the Sales Manager at my 1st job. The same guy who interviewed, and rejected, me for the department last year. It appears that one of his new reps isn't working out very well and will be leaving. Now the Sales Manager and the Area Vice President have discussed my joining the team.
   The only problem is that I don't really want to do it anymore. I'm not any more qualified for the position now than I was last year, so I don't know why they would ask. But the Area Vice Prez does throw his weight around quite a bit, and people obey him. It's overwhelming, actually. I really don't know what to make of the whole situation. And to be honest, I'm not really even going to try. I'm not going to sell myself, because I honestly don't care. The money would be nice, but there are just as many drawbacks.

Anyway, a few days ago, I used up & got rid of ALL of my remaining Herbal Essences products. Herbal Essences can kiss my gritz.
   Yesterday, I clarified with Pantene Purity shampoo, a vinegar rinse and Pantene Daily Moisture Renewal conditioner. No leave-in's. Clean start.
   Today, I washed twice with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense shampoo, and followed with a Snowy's Treatment, which I actually have to rinse out right now.
   I'll follow with the matching Restoratives conditioner, then use Pantene Light Spray Conditioner before detangling. I won't have time to plan an outfit or put on makeup. In fact, I don't really even have time to be typing this right now. Oy! There just aren't enough hours!!! Peace.

Well, fingers are crossed anyway for the interview.....  :)

If all else fails, at least you'll have the experience of another "do you really want the job" meetings.

Sometimes bad things have to happen to force us to change directions when we don't have the strength or courage to make the changes on our own.

You've had several good things happen - a raise, a new car, and a potential new job.  I think you are heading down a new path towards bigger and better things.  Go with it and see where it takes you!

I figured I would make another entry tonight, while I'm waiting for laundry to finish, because I may or may not have time tomorrow. *sigh* Busy, busy, busy...  :P

I actually ended up keeping my hair down for the majority of the day. It was very soft and fine, and was behaving itself pretty well. The problem I have with only detangling from the ears down is that the hair on top dries flat against the crown. There's no "lift" if I don't detangle the top. But detangling the top puts leave-in conditioner on the roots, which makes it oilier than necessary. Plus it's harder to detangle on top. Oy. I'd rather have flat, healthy roots than greasy, broken ones.

Tomorrow will be another Restoratives day. And every day thereafter until my Restoratives bottles are gone. I'm going to buy a Suave Professionals S & C next, but I can't decide which ones. I want to try the Humectant formulas but their base detergent is ammonium lauryl sulfate, which I have heard is the harshest one.  :(  But omg, the formula smells like coconuts!!!

On the way home from the hospital on Saturday, I got a call from a friend that I hadn't heard from in a long time. She said that she'd lost my number, and had to get it from my boyfriend - twice - while he was helping her and her husband move.
   She wants to get together this weekend so we can catch up. It should be totally fun.  ;D

The meeting with the Sales Manager went unexpectedly well. I had been wrong, it turns out, on a few points.
   For one, it wasn't he who had rejected me for the department the first time. It was the former Area Vice President, whom he had discussed my possible "promotion" with. The new AVP thinks that transferring to the other department is an excellent idea. I have a meeting with him when he comes back to our location.
   For two, the representative whom I had heard wasn't working out is "working out" just fine. It is a different rep who already left the department that they are trying to replace.

In any case, I still didn't "try" or sell myself. I didn't have to. I walked right in from outside, with no makeup and my hair all a mess, into the Sales Manager's office and we discussed the possibility like the co-workers that we are. He still wants me to fill the position, and thinks that the new Area Vice President will be in agreeance.
   If it all works out, it could be a very big opportunity. Very big.

So tomorrow will likely be a "summer goth" day, if I can manage to get up early enough. I will have to become accustomed to waking up at 5 am every single day if I'm preparing for a full-time position. I'm worried for my hair. With such a demanding schedule, I certainly won't be able to treat it as often as I currently do. I may have to settle for once a week.  :P  I hope that's enough! I'll have to remember to just oil the crap out of it every day and be diligent about regular trims.
   
Speaking of which, I haven't heard anything yet from Scissor Lady. She's supposed to call me this week to reschedule my trim. It's been 6 months since my last & I don't think I want to push it to 7! The ends are visibly drying out, and I totally don't want them to split.

Anyway, I just finished the last of my, er, posterior exercises for the month. Tomorrow, I begin training the hips. Still haven't made it to the beach for cardio...but I really want someone to come with me.  :(

Alright, laundry's almost done. Man, I doubt I'll be getting up at 5:00. It's almost 11:00 now.  >:(

Yay for a tush of steel!  ;D

I'd love to go to the beach.. it is just waaaayyy too hot around here to go anywhere but in the AC...  :P

Things sound very promising,Angel!  Good for you,you deserve it!! ;D

Thank you kindly, Curlgirl.  :)

Novusfemina: LOL @ tush of steel. I'd have a long way to go yet before I could make that claim.  ;)  But it is a little better back there. lol
   I know what you mean about the heat. UGH!  :P  We don't have such insufferable humidity out here - just dry, scorching desert climate. The beach has the coolest temps - I'd gladly take you with me!  ;D

So no summer goth thing today. 5:00 am....what was I thinking? I didn't even get up at 6:00!  ::)  This full-time thing is going to be one heck of an adjustment. But it's surprising what I'm able to force myself to do when I absolutely must. I learned a long time ago that if you want to accomplish anything, you have to work your tail off.

Today I washed & conditioned with Pantene Restoratives Breakage Defense S & C respectively. Used Pantene Light Spray Conditioner before detangling with my RS #45. Didn't really have time to oil...yet again. I'm so bad about that!  :-[

Left my hair down for most of the morning and brushed it out with my Conair Velvet purse brush when it was finally dry. Then I ducked into the ladies' room for a minute to check my hair in the mirror.
   OMG I wish I had a digicam!! My hair had dried so smoothly and perfectly, it looked like one of the traditional hair pix that so many long-haired ladies here post. Mine would have fit right in, and I would have been able to show everyone what these caramel spiderweb strands really look like and how close I am to BSL...gosh darnit!  :-/
   Hopefully my new position will allow me to afford a digicam in the future. Not to mention repair my Rebel!!! I miss it so!  :'(  I've been deprived of it so long, that I've just gotten used to going without. Photography used to be my LIFE!

So today after work, I finally broke down and bought new S & C. Suave Humectant. I just want to try it, ok?? Some things you just can't know until you try.

In a few days, my Restoratives will be gone, and I had a bunch of other stuff to pick up anyway, I figured that making 2 trips wouldn't be very efficient. So I just got the S & C now. It's waiting for me in the silver wire basket under the sink...which is now surprisingly empty.  :)

Today I made up a chart to help me determine just how much hair growth I've gotten every month, and how much I can expect to get in a year. Apparently, my hair grows slightly slower than most people's....I multiplied the past 6 months' growth by 2, and according to that, I can expect no more than 5 ½ inches of growth per year. Minus what I take off every 6 months with trims. That sux!!  :(  So far this year, I've gotten 2 ¾" total. *sigh*

I'm beginning to wonder just how long I can procrastinate on trims. If I could get away with only getting one trim per year, that would be awesome!! My hair would be so long! I think that would really be pushing it, though. The ends dry out after about 5 months, though they never split. I don't want to ever give them that chance.

Weekday #2 and still no word from Scissor Lady. I've thought about just going into a salon...dun dun dunnnnnnnnnn  :o  But we all know what would happen there, eh?  ::)
   *snip snip snip* "Wow, your hair is so thin!" *snip snip* "Have you ever coloured it?" *snip snip snip* "How about highlights?" *snip snip* "Do you want it layered? How 'bout a body wave?" *hack hack hack* "Here, let me style it for you." *yank yank yank, rip rip rip, rat rat rat, snap snap snap* "Alright, now we'll blowdry...that'll be $87.50...see you in 2 weeks!"  :o  :o  :o

I think not. Let's just hope that Scissor Lady calls soon!

Anyway, I'm totally brainfarting right now. I forgot everything else that I was going to say.  :P  So...'til next time.