Hello everyone, I don't have very long hair but I'm working on it. I have very badly split ends and i think I just need to cut it all off and start fresh, but I really don't want to. I have tried to twist and cut the ends that stuck out but I have some health hairs that stick out too because my hair is layer and I have a lot of broken hair so its all different lengths I hate it, but I desperatly want it long and healthy. I have done a lot of research of takeing care of hair and I'm doing pretty good with it now, but I just don't know what to do. I know my hubby doesn't want me to cut it even though he says he don't care. If you guys have a way of me not having to cut my hair please help, I would like to keep it but if not then I will cut it.                      legomypago

The longer you stay on this board, the less desire you will have for a cut.

WELCOME!!!  ;D ;D

You said you have "healthy hairs that stick out too".. but I think those are probably just hairs that are growing in, and not yet their full length. I have a bazillion of those... they have tapered ends.

Look forward to seeing your posts ;)

Anais

WELCOME! I trim off any split ends that I have one at a time hair by hair. Its a big job but I don't want to cut the good ones off with the split ones so sometimes when Iam just waiting in the car or something like that I just take fingernail clippers and snip off any splits I find. Also when I have something on TV that I don't have to pay close attention to I will snip off split ends. I don't know of any other way than by doing it one at a time that you can avoid getting the good ends along with the bad.

hello!! don't give in if long hair is what you really want!!

i am totally addicted to cutting split ends, to a degree i am not even able to find more than one a week. i don't use the twisting method at all, i just search like that over the whole lengths (i have layers too grrrr).

@ anais: do you mean with "tapered ends" those ones who have a very fine and fragile end? in case yes, i call them the baby virgin hairs, and i cut off their fine tip question to have something to cut!  ;D

You say you don't have very long hair...how long is your hair? If your husband doesn't want you to cut it off, it must be pretty long in his eyes.

The worst thing you can do is cut off all your hair, good and bad. That will make it take much, much longer to grow. Guys who are trying to grow long hair do this all the time, sometimes setting themselves back a year or more because of a bad trim.

The only time you would have to do a drastic cut like that would be if your hair was so badly damaged that formation of tangles results in even more damage.  

Combining this with regular conditioning and oiling will give you healthy hair as soon as possible.

If your hair is shoulder-length or longer, I suggest starting regular monthly 1/2" trims. While you do this, your length will not be increasing, but the health of your hair will improve noticeably within the first few months. Feel free to skip a trim any time you don't feel like it.

My hair is almost 20" long below my shoulders. It was to the bottom of my bra  :'( but i had my mother-in-law trim it and I ended up with a few inches gone. I have been trimming my split ends and working on the but there are so many and I have a baby so I don't always have a lot of time to sit and trim. My splits have splits and those splits have splits sometimes too. But I have noticed as I have been cutting off the bad ends my hair has been smoother which is a nice feeling. I had a perm put in my hair about 4 months ago maybe and i had one just three or four months before that one that didnt want to take. Yeah I know really bad idea too close together will never do that again. I'm tring really hard not to cut my hair, it helps that I really don't want to and know that my hubby don't want me to.

How do I oil my hair? I have heard a lot about it, but haven't tried it. I do usually  massage my scalp and then try to rub what oils i got off my scalp onto my ends. Oh and what are good oils to use and where can i get them?

Jojoba is good. It's a little expensive to buy it in a natural food store, but a little bit goes a long way. I also use a blend of that and coconut oil, which may need to be warmed a bit if you don't live in a warm climate.

Take a drop or two on your fingertips, blend across your fingers and palms, and work into the ends of your hair. You can do this when your hair is either wet or dry, some people have better results with wet hair. A few strokes with a brush will even out distribution of the oils. This will make a huge difference in the dry feeling of your ends and their tangliness.

The perm thing, though, that explains the condition of your hair. Bad. Very bad for long hair. You need to come to peace with your natural hair if you want to have long healthy hair.

Welcome legomypago!!  I second what ekatherine said
in her first post.  when I first found this site abut 6 months ago, I was going to chop my hair because it
was dried out and frizzy from highlighting every 2 mos
along with blowdrying and curling irons.  I read over
the "Ultimate Guide to growing long hair, and I trim off
about 1/2" .every 1-2 months.  Because of this my hair
has only grown about 2 inches in 6 months but it
is MUCH healthier.   Now i can go 3 months without a
trim and this time maybe even a little longer. (No longer
than 4 mos for me, though).  I'm SO glad I didn't cut my hair off!

Oh please don't cut the "fragile" tapered tips! (unless it's for a routine dust trim of course, 1/8 inch off ALL ends) In my experience, the virgin tapered ends are less likely to fray and split than the already-cut ends. I believe that cutting exposes the inside of the hair shaft, while the virgin ends are still "sealed". Just a thought. :-*

And no more letting the mother-in-law trim your hair! ;D ;D Here's how many longhairs self-trim: http://members.fortunecity.com/feye/trim/ ...and Feye ROCKS!

Anais

tapered ends indeed don't seem to split, but they do seem to have often damage right above the end. maybe it's just my idea.